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About The Albany register. (Albany, Or.) 1868-18?? | View Entire Issue (March 27, 1869)
PUBLISHED KVERr'sATPRBAT BT COLLINS VAXCiEVE. orrtci ok corxeb of teurt- isd first-sts., OPPOSITE W. W. PARR1SH CO.'S STORK. TERMS IX ADVANCE. ' Oo Teir..i.. i.J,:t.i v...,.lThre olWi Six Months .'. Two Dollar Single Copie. ...... ....... 1... ......... Ten Lenti ADVERTISING RATES. One Coluinn,' per Year, $10r; Half Column, $60 ; Quarter Column, $35. Transient advertisements per Square of ten lines or less, first insertion, $3; each subsequent insertion, $1. : t ? BUSINESS CARDS. AliCAWIT BATH MOUSE. THE TJXDERSIGXED WOULD RESPECT fullv inform tho citizens of Albany and vi- cinitr that he has take charge of ..this establish ' ment, and, by keeping clean rooms and paying strict attention to business, expects to suit all those who may favor him with their patronage. Having heretofore carried on nothing but First-dau felair Dressing' Saloons, ' he expects to give entire satisfaction to all. SSr Children and Ladies' hair neatly rut and shampooed. JOSEPH WEBBER. , GEO. W. GRAY, D. D. S., GRADUATE OF THE CINCINNATI DEN tal Collage, would invite all persons desiring artificial teeth, and first-class dental operations, to give him a call. Specimens of Vulcanite Base with gold-plate linings, and other new styles of work, may be C lean at his office, in Pajriah & Co.'s brick, (up stairs) Albany, Oregon. I Residence Corner Second and Baker sts. 2 ; u. rice, in: PHYSICIAN AND1 SURGEON, A LB AIVY, OREGON. OTTICE ON SOUTH SIDE OF MAIN street. Albany, September. 19, 68-2tf . C- POWELL L. FLISS. Powell' & ' Flinn, , A TTORNEYS & COUNSELLORS AT LAW and Solicitors in Chancery, .mm -. . WVi: Albany, Oregon. ' Collections and conveyances prom ply attended to. 1 W. HITABIOEL. F. M. REDFIELD. Hiltabidel & Co., DEALERS IN GROCERIES AND PRO Tisions, Wood and Willow Ware, Confec tionery, Tobacco, Cigars, Pipes, Notions, etc. Main street, adjoining the Express office, Albany, E. A. Freeland, DEALER IN EVERY DESCRIPTION OF School, Miscellaneous ,and Blank Books, Stationery, Gold and Steel Pens,Ink, etc., Post office Building, Albany, Oregon. Books ordered from New York and San Francisco. 1 S. H. Clauyhton, , NOTARY PUBLIC AND REAL ESTATE AGENT. Office in the Post Office building, : Lebanon, Oregon. Will attend to making Deeds and other convey ances, also to the prompt collection of debts en " trusted to my care. ; c. Mealey & Co.; MANUFACTURERS OF AND DEALERS in all kinds of Furniture and Cabinet , First street, Albany. J. N. BOLPH. A. SMITH. J. B. MITCHELL. Mitchell, Dolph & Smith, ATTORNEYS Ann COUNSELLORS at LAW, Solicitors in Chancery and Proctors in Ad " miralty. Office over the old Post Office,. Front street, Portland, Oregon. . I NEW ENGLAND MUTUAL LIFE INSURANCE CO. or BOSTON. INCORPORATED lc"35. Cash assets... $7,000,000 00 r Caak. distributions of 1867 526.5A3 55 1 Total surplus dividend 2,727,573 55 Losses paid in 1867 381,600 00 Total losses paid. 2,796,100 00 Income for 1867- 2,203,808 00 -ir 'H extra charge for traveling to and from the Atlantic States, Europe, Oregon, or the Sandwich Island. ' - "-- "- ; All Policies non-forfeiting, and governed by the j nom-forfeitmg law of Massachusetts, Policy holders the only persons who receive divi dends in this Company, which are declared and paid annually ; first dividend avail able t the payment of ihfi second ,' if ain.l prroinm. AH Policies L . ' . remain in force as long as there'is any surrender 2701 FORFEITURES I Thil old and popular Company, (the oldest Mu tual Lift Insurance Company in this country) insures at the low- I The stability of this Company, with iU past his tory, increasing capital and business, aud the sat isfactory manner in which it has discharged its obligations Jn ba.Jst,.rernafaB.tees for the future such as far-seeing and careful men require in their investments. Persons generally, who thoroughly understand tho workings of Life Insurance, are anxious , to avail themselves of Unequitable fmrrisions; - ; Full Information will be given to those who Horn Office, 39: State Street, Boston. ; ,T. Pacifq Bfeoob? TJfficee, s 4 O 30 Montgomery street San Francisco. Room 8, Carter' e Building, Portland, Oregon, EVERSOIff 9k ZXAXNE3, Ctaneral Ats. KUSSEJLJL fcEEKEV8, JLgt s, Albany, September 19,1868-27 ' A LL those knowing themselves indebted to us ftX. are respeeUolly requested te call and settle immediately. . . 4 . , . .;,it A - fHd account nwt oe ttUftdi -.-ti a,x , BEACH -4 MONTEITH . aibaayi October lOtt, '68, ALBANY ADVERTISEMENTS CEO. F. SETTLEMIER, X K. IJ Gr Cr I S T. (Successor to D. W. Wakefield,) Parrl8hs New Building-,' First Street, ALBANY, OREGON, " DEALER IN Irugs and Medicines, CHEMICALS, PAINTS, OILS, GLASS, ETC. All articles warranted pure and of the best quality. Physicians Proscriptions carefully compounded. Albany, Out. 17, lS68-Ctf , , PICTURES . J, A. WI5TER, HAA'ING PURCHASED the well-furnished . PICTURE GAEEEItY formerly belonging to A. B. Paxton, is prepared to make - i . Fliotosretplis 2 from "Carte de Visite" up to life size. Also, AMBROTYPES & "SUM PEARLS!" Any person who has had card pictures mado hero since the Gallery, burned down (ISC'!) ran get pictures from the negatives at the rate of three dollars per dozen. . Having had eight years' experience in the bus iness, I believe that I can insure to give satisfac tion. . J. A. WINTER. Albany, Sept.. 19, 186S-2tf Good Iictxxies I MADE: IX CLOUDY WEATHER ! J. A. WINTER. Oct 31, lS6S-$tf Hew Columbian Hotel, Nos. US, 120 and, 122 Front street, PORTLAND, : : : OREGON. ED. CARNEY, PROPRIETOR. The targ-est, Best and most Convenient Hotel in Portland! Located in the center of business and near all the steamboat landings.' Board and Lodging1 From one to tiro dollars per day according to the room occupied. JgSf Rooms newly furnished and well ventil ated. Superior accommodations for families. Z3 The New Columbian Hotel Coach will bo in attendance at all the landings to convey pas sengers and baggage to and from this Hotel 17 jz1 Free ol Charge ! 69 .ttentloxi! FARMERS ! TIILL JTIEiV ! . AND ALL HAVING MACHINERY ! T is h HE ALBANY LARD OIL FACTORY has resumed operations, and is prepared to furn- by the quantity. Different grades are kept on hand for sale, at different prices. The No 1 Grade is Warranted to be ' strictly Pare ! 31- Orders from abroad respectfully solicited. All orders should be accompanied by the cash. Cash or Soap will be paid for Pure Lard and rancid or scorched Grease, delivered at the Factory. McCOBD & GEORGE. Albany, Jan. 2, 1869-17 FIRE MD MARINE INSURANCE. Insurance Oorrrpaixy Nos. 416 and 419 California Street, San Francisco, Cal. Stockholders Individually Liable. ' Cash Capital, in Gold Coin, 8T50.000. : Deposit in Oregon, $50,000. Losses Promptly and Equitably Adjusted. THIS COMPANY having complied wifh the laws of Oregon, by making a deposit of fifty thousand dollars, is now prepared to effect insur ance against Loss or Damage by Fire, and also against Marine and Inland Navigation risks, on liberal terms. r . . - GUSTAVE TOUCHARD, Pres. PHAS.;I. HAVENr Sec'y.J ; J , W. W. Parrisn & Co., '-- ; Amenta for Albany. ' Albany, jannary 9. 1869-18 r 1 t M. G0TTGETREU, "Importer and Dealer in the choicest brands of HAVANA & DOMESTIC CIGARS, Chewing' & Smoking- Tobacco, - Pipes, Stems, Snuff, Playing Cards, Stationery, Cutlery and Notions, , , l -nr. I 'jfo.'iir -Front . Street; I ; ! Cor." Morrison, opposite Western Hotel, '1- r0RTtAND, OREGON. j aU Goods at Wholesale or RetaJL-5; 3L Country orders carefully put up, at lewest rat9i.Sl;iK .r. -;;Wt ja96918 ; PORTLAND ADVERTISEMENTS. W."R. SEW ALL. GEO. B. COOK. COSIflOPOEITAiV HOTEL. (rORMEHLV ARRipOSl's,) Front street : : i Portland, Oregon. THE UNDERSIGNED, HAVING PUR chased this well known Hotel, are now pro cured to offer the traveling public better -accommodations than can be found elsewhere in the city., , . . Board aud Lodging S3 oo per day. Tho Hotel Coach will bo in attendance to con vey Passengers and buggago to and from tho Hotel free f chary e. SEWALL & COOK. Office Oregon & California Stage Company, E. G. Whiteiioi:sk, Agent. 2tf BUGIITEL'S Pn()T0GRAPII GALLERY, S THE ONLY ESTAELISHMENT IN Oregon that is thorouchlv preijared to do all the different styles of work in the art. Photo graphs from card to life size. Tho new' cabinet carils, Ac, Ac. Pictures eulargcd, retouched in India ink, painted in water-colors; by 3Vlre. B. J. Rumsey. Pictures that are fading can be repro duced in this way. Negatives carefully preserved so that additional copies mav be had at any time. . JOSEPH BUCHTEL. Portfand, Oregon. t OREUOIV SEED STOKE. PRODUCE AND COM3IISSION WAREHOUSE 2 Consigniuenta of Produce solicited. nl K. E. CDATFIELB, ( Opposite the Western Hotel,) PORTLAND, OREGON. WESTERN HOTEL, PORTLAND, ORKGON, DORCY & HOLIV.ES, PROPRIETORS. HIS HOTEL IS LOCATED NEAR THE Steamship Landing. The Hotel Coach will be in attendance at all the Landings to convey passengers and basrage to and from tho House FREE OF CHARGE, i:i9-lS AIWEItBCAIV EXCHANGE, -CORNER OF- Frout and Washington Streets, PORTLAND, OREGON. X,. P. W. Qnimby, - - - - Proprietor. (Late of the Western Hotel.) TniS HOUSE is the most commodious in the State, newly furnished, and it will be ths endeavor of the Proprietor to make his gncste comfortable. Nearest Hotel to tho steamboat landing. Thu Concord Coach will always be foun at the landing, on the arrival of steamships and river boats, carrying passengers and their bag gage to and from the boats free of charye. House supplied tcith Patent fire jctinjuinJiers. ALBANY ADVERTISEMENTS. E. F. RUSSELL, ATTORNEY AT LAW. JAMES ELKINS, VOTARY PUBLIC. RUSSELL & ELKINS, (OSce in Farrish A Co.'s block, First street.) Albany, Oregon. HAVING TAKEN INTO CO-PARTNERSHIP Jasiks Elktns, Es(i., ex-Clerk of Linn county, we are enabled to add to our prac tice of Law and Collections, superior facilities for Conveyancing', Examining Records, and attending to Probate business. Deeds, Bonds, Contracts and Mortgages care fully drawn. . . Homestead and Pre-emption Papers made, and cjhims secured. Salc3 of J Real Estate negotiated, and loans effected onf collateral securities on reasonable rates. . C All business entrusted to them faithfully and promptly executed. i , RUSSELL A ELKINS. Albany, Oct. 10, '6S-5y NO MORE HIGH PRICES FOR ALBANY Come and buy Goods at prices of 1860. J. E. BENTLEY, SEN., HAVING RECEIVED -FROM SAN FRAN uisco, by latest shipments, the largest stock of Boots and Shoes ! . Consisting of the following lines of Goods : Gents'; Fine Sewed Boots, Gents': Fine Pegged Boots, . l : Boya and Children's Boots, Ladies and Misses Boots, Kid Congress Gaiters, : And Children's Gaiters, i Rubber Over-Shoes, and Shoes of all Descriptions. , Gentlemen's Boots Made to Order! On short notice ; and with neatness and dispatch, ALL KINDS tXF REPAIRING DONE! ' Sole and Upper Leather for Sale At the lowest figures for Cash. Give me a call and see for yourselve , ;. ' . - f , f 2tf , Iteal Estate for Sale ! ' THOSE WHO DESIRE TO PURCHASE" A good Lathed and Plastered New Frame Dwelling1 House, two stories in hight, kitchen and wood-shed at taohed, with private barn, well situated - in the city of Albany, will do well to call, without delay, on - RUSSELL A ELKINS, ; Albany, Oct 17, '88-6 Real Estate Agts. ; . : : - ,-1 Administrator'a Notice. Estate of Z. if. Bond, deceased. NOTICE is hereby given by the undersigned administrator, of tha above named estate, to the .creditors of, and all persons- having claims against,, said deceased, to present tha same, with necessary vouchers, within six months from this notice, to the undersigned at his residence, six miles- south of Peoria, Linn county, Oregon. ; JAMES SHERRILL, , . - -Psbv 11, 186923 -. i -v , , . ;r Adm. r ii'ir-i'-'ii .a . Svsszu. 4 SLLim,Atty. ; NEW ADVERTISEMENTS. Albany Weekly Register JOB PRINTING ; oppic: First street, (Zpite Purrish a? Co.'s store,) Albany ; s : Oregon. AVING a very fair assortment of material we are prepared to execute, with neatness and dispatch, all kinds of JOB raiJJIETGr such as ; Jland-hifls, Programmes, JJ ill-heads, -i ' Cards. Ball TicJcets, ! Pamphfots, ( Labels, ! ' JUanl-s of : all kinds, 1 . 1 at as low figures as a duo regard to taste and good work will allow. When you want anything in the printing line,. call at the Register office. Flax Seed Agency. -o- E. ; CART WRIGHT, Sole Agent for Oregon. A FULL SUPPLY OP THE FOR LOANING TO FAKIWCEKS. - Addross, ; I ' E. CARTWRIGHT, March 1 3, 'C9-27 Albany, Ogn. i NOTICE. : " THE ANNUAL ASSESSMENT LIST, under the Ui S. Internal Revenue Law, for Divis ion No. 5, eonsistiuir of Linn, Lane aud Benton counties in the District of Oregon, will bo open for public examination and correction at my office, in Eugene City, from the 12th day of March to the 22d day of March, 1869 ; where all persons claiming deductions or abatement f taxes, in consequence of erroneous asestneiil must do so in writing before the expiration oTtfiis notice, as no deduction will be allowed after the list is closed and turned over to the collector. Eugene City, the 10th day of March, 1S69. E. W. FOLSOM, U. S. Assistant Assessor, mlSn2 5th Div., Dist. of Ogn. TL. O O HERE I PJ-OU THAT WANT BARGAINS -IN FURNITURE! Such as Chairs, Tables, Bedsteads, Wash stands, etc. : Crockery, Carpets, Bedding, Looking-glasses, Doors, Sash, Blinds, and in fact any thing in the line of house-keeping, are invited to call at the residence of J. B. Sprengc-r, and make your selection, as he will sell everything saved from the fire that destroyed the Pacific Hotel at the very lowest rates, for a few days. Call early and get the first choice. Residence on Second Street, We?t of Washing ton, Albany, Oregon. J. B. SPRENGER. I ' RATES OF TOLL OVER THE Willamette Vallev and Cascade Mountain Wagon Road To Deschuttes River : Four Horse or Mule team... $t 50 Two " " " .". 00 One " " 2 00 Ox teams, three yoke..... 4 50 For every additional yoke 50 Loose horses, per head 25 " cattle, per head 15 " sheep cr hogs 3 Teams returning empty, half price. Pack animals, loaded.- 50 " " unloaded 25 Horse and rider. 1 00 To Kisli Lake : Four horse or mule team, each way 2 00 Two " " " 1 50 One " " ' " " 1 00 Pack animals, loaded 50 " unloaded 25 Horse and rider J . 75 Ox team, three yoke 2 00 To Upper Soda Spring : - Four horse or mule team, out and back 2 50 Two " .. .. . 2 00 One " " " 1 00 Horse and rider, . " 50 Loose animals, ' " 25 Ox teams the same as horse teams. A. HACKLEMAN, W. W. Pabkish, Pres. Sec. March 20, 1809-28 BTOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN, that the annual school meeting of District No. 5, Linn County, Ore gon, will be held at the school-house on Monday, the 5th day of April, 1869, at 1 o'clock P. M., for the purpose of electing two directors one to fill vaeancy for one year and one for the full term and one clerk. Also, to levy a tax to re pair school-house and fence. By order of the di rectors. A. N. ARNOLD, Clerk Maroh 18, 1869-28 ' ofDisUNo. 5. NOTICE. Guardian's Sale. BY VIRTUE OP AN ORDER to mo granted by the County Court of Polk county, Oregon, at the February term, 1869, I will, on Tuesday, 30th day of March, 1869, at 10 o'clock A. M. of said day, at the door of the Court House in Albany, Linn county, Oregon, offer for sale at public auction, tho following de scribed real estate in said Linn county, to-wit : The -undivided- one-tenth part of tho donation land claim of John Ingram and Larrisea Ann In gram, deceased, claim No. (56) being part of sec tions 1, 2, 11 and 12, township 16 south range 4 west ; also part of seotious 1 and 12, township 16 south range 4 west, oommencing at Henry Hays' donation laud claim south-east corner, thence east 61 rods, thence north 204J rods, thence west 109 rods, thence south 71 rods, thence east 48 rods, thence south 133i rods' to the place of beginning, containing 99 acres, from S. P. Hamilton. There is of the donation 254 acres, 160 acres of this subject to the life estate of John Sutton, leaviug 193i acres clear of any incumbrance. , Teems or Sale United States gold coin: r A. 6. HAMILTON, Guardian : j ..... of Francis M. Hamilton, r j ,. Bvbos W. IlAnrLTOjr, j . . : '. Melissa J. Hamilton. February 15, 1869-24w4 .. SATURDAY, MARCH 27, 18G9. AGRICULTURAL. HOW TO KEEP EGOS FRZ5H. As detailed in the Maiao Parmer, the following very simple plan we have never tried , and know nothing practically whether it be effectual or not. We found it in the "Farm Journal," quoted from the "English Agricultural Gazette." Vre pas3 it over to our readers for their consideration. Take a half-inch board of any conve nient lenth and breadth, and pierce it as full of holes (each one and-a-half inches diameter, as you can. I find that a board two feet and six inches in length, and oue foot wide, has five dozen iu it, say twelve rows of five each. ; Then take four strips two inches broad, and nail thera together into a rectangu lar frame. Kail this board upon the frame, and the work is done, unless you choose to nail a beading arouud that too. Put your eggs in this board as they come from the poultry house, the Small end down, and they will keep good for six months, if you take the following pre cautions : Take care that the eggs do not get wet, either in the nest or after wards. (In summer, hens are fond of laying among the weeds or grass and any eggs taken from such nests in wet weath er stiDuld be put away for immediate use.) Ieep them in a cool room in summer, and out of the reach of frost in winter. If two boards be kept, one can be rilling wr.i'e the other is emptying. Tre writer accounts for the preserva tion of eggs in this way by supposing that the yelk floats more equally in the white, and has less tendency to sink down against the shell, than when the egg is laid on one side certainly, if the yolk touches the shell it spoils immedi ately. HINTS TO HOUSEKEEPERS. IJow to keephot water always in the house. Let your wife find out that you visit another woman, and you will never afterwards be out of hot water. This is infallible. 5 How to bone turkeys. Get up at 2 o'clock A. M. The darker it is the bet ter. Climb over your neighbor's fence and bone the first gobbler you can. You had better bone two or three while you are at it, as it saves trouble. . You will find this plan very economical. To make hasty pudding. Make your pudding, and leave it out on the door step to cool, carefully shutting the door afterwards. In five minutes -return and you will find it the hastiest pudding imaginable, it being perhaps five or six squares off already. The best beats Those on which the policemen have the least trouble. Never have dead beats about your kitchen. How to obtain calve's head jelly. Consult one of the outside butchers, and question his veracity on the subject of mutton, and incidentally accompany the rebuff with an insinuation that he is of canine extraction. You will have calves' head jelly pretty soon. Pickles Always be disputing with your relatives. A very sour pickle will be the consequence. These pickles are usually put in family jars. To clean house. Get. up an alarm of fire and invite the members of the fire brigade into your premises. They will provide a bountiful supply of water and wash the house thoroughly until request ed to delist. i Irish stew. This is a favorite viand variously prepared. The most expedi tious method is to attend a wake and in troduce a discussion on the wrongs of England, through Ireland's ingratitude. The recipe is from the works of ancient Scald. ' ". ' CURES FOR FELONS. As there is much needless suffering from felons, we deem' it a duty to give the following remedies : .. Take a portion of the bark of sweet elder, or hops will do, put it with some sweet cream into a cup, and boil a short time; then put in a lump of saltpetre twice a3 large as a pea, let it slowly dry away to the consistency of a salve, which apply to the. felon. The saltpetre is the cure, but the elder bark and sweet cream aid in easing the pain. As felons some times make it ; necessary to amputate a finger or hand, (if left alone), they should be attended to immediately. - f Here is another cure : As soon as the parts begin to swell, wap the affected part with a cloth thoroughly saturated with tincture of lobelia, and the felon is dead: An old physician says . lie -j has known it to cure in scores of cases, and it never fails if applied ia season. Uu Hakd o.v the, ,4,,J5LOOU.,' -A the Russian Emperor's daughter speaks Ger man imperfectly and the Bavarian King is a poor French scholar and knows not one word of Russian, the two loversjhaye to do their billing and cooing in - broken language. The fastest time" on Record is , that of an Australian horse which ran ten miles in 23 minutes and 35 seconds. ' Why is a patch of corn like a dunce ! Because it's always liable to have its ears pulled. ' ' ' - ' "; The House has refused to increase the pay of the Justices of Supreme Court or the pay of Department Clerks. ; ' , '. '-' "Especially shun whisky, fast women and the United States," were the dying words of a man who was hanged in Canada the other day. :f . ( It is estimated that the State of Ne vada in 1SU8. produced 16,000,000 in bullion. ' ... ''";, The first medical diploma e ver ' " given in Russia was received by M'me Kasche warow a feck weeks since. i . VARIOUS ITEMS. ' ' Why is a hen immortal ? . Because her son never sets. , , . A poor woman can see more sympathy in a six-pence than in streams of tears. Most of the shadows that cross our path through life are caused by bur standing in our own light. r Why is a restless ' sleeper like a law yer? Because he lies on one side, -then lie turns and lies on the other. a i; A Yankee doctor recently got up a remedy for hard times. It consists of ten hours' hard labor well worked in., ., Why is it important for a physician to "keep his temper?" Because if he did not, he would be apt to "lose his patients." "' 1 Squibbs, in view of the last election, gives it as his deliberate conviction that ducks may lay eggs, but only c;eese lay wagers. ... - - . ., ;'-. ",;:-i.i! It is said "President Johnson ; Trill go out of offiee poor." : Poor, in reputation we surmise. According to Shakespeare, this makes him indeed poor. A clergyman "out West" furnishes trie following novel epitaph, which tre I hate not seen before : ' Here lies the mother of children five;., Two are dead and three are alive. The two that are dead preferring rather To die with the mother than live with the father. , Ananias B. Knott has obtained a di vorce from his wife, in St. Louis, oh the ground of "cruel and abusive treatment' lie was Knott, her husband, and she was Knott, his wife. Now she is not;-.that is to say, she is Knott, and he is divorced, still he is Knott. Why not? ' '. .... We do not, care .not, and will not add another knot to this knotty couple of Kuotts. ,. 1 A windy orator, after a lengthy , effort, stopped for a drink of water. . s ; , ; "I rise," said Bloss, "to a point of order." Everybody started, in wonder what the point of order was. j .-- i ; 1 i: "What is it?" said the speaker.- . j "I think, sir," said Bloss, ''it is out of order for a windmill to go by water. , By one decisive argument, ' ; . , Tom gained his lovely Kate's consent ' To fix the bridal day. I "Why in such haste, dear Tom, to wed ? I shall not change my mind," she said. "But then," says he, "I may.". A distinguished New York actress Iafely introduced a lawyer' in "company, who was not at all backward in sounding his own praise. ' .!'' "He is a mighty smart , man," an! ac quaintance remarked soon afterwards. "I know it," she replied ; "he told mo so himself." ' - " " A clergyman, '. who was consoling a young widow on the death of her' hus band, spoke in a very serious tone, re marking that he was "one of the Jfew. Such a jewel of a Christian you cannot find his equal, you well know." ' ' " To which the sobbing fair one replied, with an almost broken heart, "I'll bet I will." , :V 1 Are those hells ringing for fire ?" in quired Simon of Tiberius.' " tL " ' ' "No, indeed," answered Tibe : "thejL have got plenty of fire, and the bells- are ringing for water." . ,? , - , v-Sbl "Did you ever know such a mechaoibal genius as my son?" said an old. lady. "He has made a fiddle out of his . own head, and has wood enough for another' It is better' to have strength of princi ple than mere muscle, but better yet to have both. . A man who ia strong in 'ia tellect and instep is on the best terms, with nature and the world. ' . There is a place down in Virginia where old maids never' get t6 be over thirty-five. - They live up ' to that age and then go back to twenty-five; and to finally go out of the world. as Iresh .and fair as a pumpkin blossom. A, Swift, who reasoned, upon the folly of the dread of death, sums, up thus x' fit is impossible that anything bo natural, Bo necessary, and so universal, as,.;deatb, should ever have been designed by Prov idence as an evil to mankind." " 4 The -woman who marries for "money !a not overstocked with delicacy. 4 , i -. n?