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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Dec. 5, 2003)
uFor me, evolving Into being bisexual has coincided with a general sense o f wanting to move beyond ex tern a l d efin itio n s o f m yself" freedom has had an expendable tac tion, a political bargaining chip— It may lx* that the hi segment is that bargaining chip, or maybe it’s trans- gendered people. T he point is, it you don’t fit neatly into the box, you aren’t ‘one ot us’; therefore, we don’t want you or your ideas, experiences, voice in our club.” In this, Dillinger sees hypocrisy. “It is rather sad th.it some people in the [gay and lesbian) community continue to perpetuate discrimination against other people when we’ve struggled st) long and hard to tight this kind ot poisonous thinking,” he says with conviction. “It battles me that people tail to see the hypocrisy in fighting so passionately for gay rights and then turning around and criticizing or verbally bash ing bisexuality.” And even though Heche’s name brings ven omous taste to France’s mouth, she clearly sees the hypocritical oppression and its root. "We fear that which we do not understand. Unfortu- nately 1 am guilty of this, as well. The gay and lesbian community has made such strides in changing the norms of our society by challeng ing the ‘rules’ that the heterosexual culture con sider as standard. Then, we make our own set ot rules by which we believe that everyone should live within. Are we any better than those who oppress us?” Parker, who is African American, believes the same types ot oppression that exist in American society toward ethnic minorities Bi-specific resources lthough many organizations serve the bisexual community, here are a few local and national resources specifically addressing hi issues: A BiNet Oregon www.hinctor.org O f her partner of four years, France says: “1 do not understand her attraction to both men and w om en.... She’s been shaped by specific conditions in her own life that are unique from my o w n .... Each of us has a vastly different perspective.” And even though France loves and is comm itted to her partner, for her, the strug gle is one of shared values. “Religious beliefs, ■ social agendas, political agendas, family, environm ental; the list is long,” she says. And she believes they are at the cornerstone of relationships. “After the hedux>m, after the passion, we must have something that unites us.... There is a fundamental shared value for gays and les bians of sharing that experience with another — Meg D a ly gay or lesbian person...experiences like com ing out to family, friends, the hate, the fear of play out in the others, the fear within ourselves,” states gay and lesbian France. “If we don't share that experience culture, ttx)— w ith our partner because they don’t identify as even within the gay or lesbian, but instead they identify as G L B T initials. someone who just wants to be open to any “There does experience that life offers, then there is a part seem to always he of us that they cannot understand.... Like a way to develop wise, there is a part of them that we do not a social hierar understand.” chy: gay then les Occasionally, tor example, her partner bian at the top, notices someone of the opposite sex and com bisexuals in the ments on his appearance as sexy or desirable. middle and trans # # A ' “1 really cannot relate to her on this level," sexuals at the W >. à " a France concedes. “In tact, it can feel alienat bottom," Parker ing to me, even though I am not threatened points out. Like by it. It is more than being threatened, it is wise, in main more like a disconnect between us, which I stream society, attribute the need to share core values that she says: “Men at bind us together." the top, women Like her, France hopes other queers will in the middle Meg Daly identified as lesbian for six years before falling in love with her examine their own relationships and maintain and people of male partner and embracing bisexuality an active dialogue in order to break down social color at the bot barriers. She says, “1 would challenge us to lift oppressed," asserts James, referring to that tom. 1 think it is unfortunate that we care to label our ideals beyond the ‘rules’ that we seem to set which is based at the rcx>t of the unknown. “So, ourselves and allow this type of classism and pho for our society." there is an attacking that takes place to keep bia to exist anywhere.” W illiam s adds: ‘the other’ at hay, And behind the hierarchies are a new set of “Som etim es the while the entire time queer niles. worst prejudice is we don’t allow our “My own feeling is that the gay and lesbian perpetrated by those selves to recognize that community has adapted to the norms of our soci who have experi other within us...lim ety; this [in turn) seems to grant us rights in passing enced prejudice iting our ability to judgment on what is acceptable and not acceptable them selves. If we richly honor ourselves in our culture for sexual preference,” says France. — Y asm in e B ra n d e n really want freedom, and others th r o u g h ____________________ "We broke free of the constraints that were placed if we really want a full-on acceptance.” upon us to allow us to live with our gay and lesbian country where equality is cherished, we have Williams figures people are afraid that partners. Then we made new rules to ban any other got to put away our fear of what’s different “somehow if someone is something that you deviant behavior.... Shame on us.” and open-heartedly embrace diversity." JH are not, you are perverse and will be pun ished. Well, guess what? It’s OK to be whtx*v- GlNA D acxiet T is a Portland free-lance writer er the fuck you are. Billy can wear Mom’s lip who identifies as lesbian and is a 6 on the stick and pumps. Suzic can fix cars and cut Kinsey scale. She can be reached through her hair short. Chris can wear all the leather |:iJ‘Y ear plays a heavy hand in any strong www. ginadaggett. com . he/she fancies.” aversion— especially where someone is VBf, % i flU Pr*.* * » •* . ■■ » ■ ~ * ; - % : '■ :i * y i 'i mmÊ m i Mila i- v* “By Id en tify in g as blf you affirm the complex spectrum o f sex u a lity " BiNet U SA www.bisexual.org Bisexual Information Web site www.bi.org Bisexual Resource Center www.biresource.org Portland Bisexual Women portlandhiwomen@comcast.net The mirror Portland Bisexual Community Forum 503 - 285-4848 At Woodbury; & M u lo n e th e re a re 4 A u to Real Estate Broker ; Million Dollar Club a g en ts to se rv e y o u r n eed s. We take tim e to ex p la in co v era g es a n d m a k e H om e Service is the Key.. ^ reco m m en d a tio n s b a s ed o n y o u r L ife n e ed s a n d lifestyle. If it' want to work fo r y o u Elise Campbell, c r i , abr ! 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