uFor me,
evolving Into
being bisexual
has coincided
with a general
sense o f wanting
to move beyond
ex tern a l
d efin itio n s
o f m yself"
freedom has had an expendable tac
tion, a political bargaining chip— It
may lx* that the hi segment is that
bargaining chip, or maybe it’s trans-
gendered people. T he point is, it you
don’t fit neatly into the box, you
aren’t ‘one ot us’; therefore, we don’t
want you or your ideas, experiences,
voice in our club.”
In this, Dillinger sees hypocrisy.
“It is rather sad th.it some people
in the [gay and lesbian) community
continue to perpetuate discrimination
against other people when we’ve
struggled st) long and hard to tight this
kind ot poisonous thinking,” he says
with conviction. “It battles me that
people tail to see the hypocrisy in
fighting so passionately for gay rights and then
turning around and criticizing or verbally bash
ing bisexuality.”
And even though Heche’s name brings ven
omous taste to France’s mouth, she clearly sees
the hypocritical oppression and its root. "We
fear that which we do not understand. Unfortu-
nately 1 am guilty of this, as well. The gay and
lesbian community has made such strides in
changing the norms of our society by challeng
ing the ‘rules’ that the heterosexual culture con
sider as standard. Then, we make our own set ot
rules by which we believe that everyone should
live within. Are we any better than those who
oppress us?”
Parker, who is African American, believes
the same types ot oppression that exist in
American society toward ethnic minorities
Bi-specific resources
lthough many organizations serve the
bisexual community, here are a few local
and national resources specifically addressing
hi issues:
A
BiNet Oregon
www.hinctor.org
O f her partner of four years, France says: “1
do not understand her attraction to both men
and w om en.... She’s been shaped by specific
conditions in her own life that are unique from
my o w n .... Each of us has a vastly different
perspective.”
And even though France loves and is
comm itted to her partner, for her, the strug
gle is one of shared values. “Religious beliefs,
■
social agendas, political agendas, family,
environm ental; the list is long,” she says.
And she believes they are at the cornerstone
of relationships.
“After the hedux>m, after the passion, we
must have something that unites us.... There
is a fundamental shared value for gays and les
bians of sharing that experience with another
— Meg D a ly
gay or lesbian person...experiences like com
ing out to family, friends, the hate, the fear of
play out in the
others,
the fear within ourselves,” states
gay and lesbian
France. “If we don't share that experience
culture, ttx)—
w ith our partner because they don’t identify as
even within the
gay or lesbian, but instead they identify as
G L B T initials.
someone who just wants to be open to any
“There does
experience that life offers, then there is a part
seem to always he
of us that they cannot understand.... Like
a way to develop
wise, there is a part of them that we do not
a social hierar
understand.”
chy: gay then les
Occasionally, tor example, her partner
bian at the top,
notices someone of the opposite sex and com
bisexuals in the
ments on his appearance as sexy or desirable.
middle and trans
# # A
'
“1 really cannot relate to her on this level,"
sexuals at the
W >. à
"
a
France concedes. “In tact, it can feel alienat
bottom," Parker
ing to me, even though I am not threatened
points out. Like
by
it. It is more than being threatened, it is
wise, in main
more like a disconnect between us, which I
stream society,
attribute
the need to share core values that
she says: “Men at
bind us together."
the top, women
Like her, France hopes other queers will
in the middle Meg Daly identified as lesbian for six years before falling in love with her
examine their own relationships and maintain
and people of male partner and embracing bisexuality
an active dialogue in order to break down social
color at the bot
barriers. She says, “1 would challenge us to lift
oppressed," asserts James, referring to that
tom. 1 think it is unfortunate that we care to label
our ideals beyond the ‘rules’ that we seem to set
which is based at the rcx>t of the unknown. “So,
ourselves and allow this type of classism and pho
for our society."
there is an attacking that takes place to keep
bia to exist anywhere.”
W illiam s adds:
‘the other’ at hay,
And behind the hierarchies are a new set of
“Som
etim es
the
while the entire time
queer niles.
worst prejudice is
we don’t allow our
“My own feeling is that the gay and lesbian
perpetrated by those
selves to recognize that
community has adapted to the norms of our soci
who have experi
other within us...lim
ety; this [in turn) seems to grant us rights in passing
enced
prejudice
iting our ability to
judgment on what is acceptable and not acceptable
them selves. If we
richly honor ourselves
in our culture for sexual preference,” says France.
— Y asm in e B ra n d e n
really want freedom,
and others th r o u g h ____________________
"We broke free of the constraints that were placed
if we really want a
full-on acceptance.”
upon us to allow us to live with our gay and lesbian
country
where
equality
is cherished, we have
Williams
figures
people
are
afraid
that
partners. Then we made new rules to ban any other
got to put away our fear of what’s different
“somehow if someone is something that you
deviant behavior.... Shame on us.”
and open-heartedly embrace diversity." JH
are not, you are perverse and will be pun
ished. Well, guess what? It’s OK to be whtx*v-
GlNA D acxiet T is a Portland free-lance writer
er the fuck you are. Billy can wear Mom’s lip
who identifies as lesbian and is a 6 on the
stick and pumps. Suzic can fix cars and cut
Kinsey scale. She can be reached through
her hair short. Chris can wear all the leather
|:iJ‘Y ear plays a heavy hand in any strong
www.
ginadaggett. com .
he/she fancies.”
aversion— especially where someone is
VBf, %
i
flU
Pr*.* * » •*
. ■■ » ■ ~ * ; - %
: '■ :i *
y
i 'i
mmÊ
m
i
Mila i- v*
“By Id en tify in g as blf
you affirm the complex
spectrum o f sex u a lity "
BiNet U SA
www.bisexual.org
Bisexual Information Web site
www.bi.org
Bisexual Resource Center
www.biresource.org
Portland Bisexual Women
portlandhiwomen@comcast.net
The mirror
Portland Bisexual Community Forum
503 - 285-4848
At Woodbury; & M u lo n e th e re a re 4
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H om e
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L ife
n e ed s a n d lifestyle.
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work fo r
y o u
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^
(^praperlles IB