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About The Asian reporter. (Portland, Or.) 1991-current | View Entire Issue (July 6, 2015)
OPINION Page 6 n THE ASIAN REPORTER July 6, 2015 Volume 25 Number 13 July 6, 2015 ISSN: 1094-9453 The Asian Reporter is published on the first and third Monday each month. Please send all correspondence to: The Asian Reporter 922 N Killingsworth Street, Portland, OR 97217 Phone: (503) 283-4440, Fax: (503) 283-4445 News Department e-mail: news@asianreporter.com Advertising Department e-mail: ads@asianreporter.com General e-mail: info@asianreporter.com Website: www.asianreporter.com Please send reader feedback, Asian-related press releases, and community interest ideas/stories to the addresses listed above. Please include a contact phone number. Advertising information available upon request. Publisher Jaime Lim Contributing Editors Ronault L.S. Catalani (Polo), Jeff Wenger Correspondents Ian Blazina, Josephine Bridges, Pamela Ellgen, Maileen Hamto, Edward J. Han, A.P. Kryza, Marie Lo, Simeon Mamaril, Julie Stegeman, Toni Tabora-Roberts, Allison Voigts Illustrator Jonathan Hill News Service Associated Press/Newsfinder Copyright 2015. Opinions expressed in this newspaper are those of the authors and not necessarily those of this publication. Member Associated Press/Newsfinder Asian American Journalists Association Better Business Bureau Pacific Northwest Minority Publishers (PNMP) Philippine American Chamber of Commerce of Oregon MY TURN n Wayne Chan The “do-as-I-say, not-as- I-do” advice for my son Correspondence: The Asian Reporter welcomes reader response and participation. Please send all correspondence to: Mail: 922 N Killingsworth Street, Portland, OR 97217-2220 Phone: (503) 283-4440 ** Fax: (503) 283-4445 News Department e-mail: news@asianreporter.com General e-mail: info@asianreporter.com SUBSCRIPTION RATES (U.S. rates only) Individual subscription (sent bulk rate): q Half year: $14 q Full year: $24 q Two years: $40 Individual subscription (sent first class mail): q Half year: $24 q Full year: $40 q Two years: $72 Office subscription (5 copies to one address): q Half year: $40 q Full year: $75 q Two years: $145 Institutional subscription (25 copies to one address): q Half year: $100 q Full year: $180 q Two years: $280 NEW SUBSCRIBER / ADDRESS CORRECTION INFORMATION FORM: Subscriber’s name: Company name: Address: City, State, ZIP: Phone: Fax: E-mail: Mail with payment or Fax with credit card information to: The Asian Reporter, Attn: Subscription Dept., 922 N Killingsworth Street, Portland, OR 97217-2220 Phone: (503) 283-4440 * Fax: (503) 283-4445 q q q For VISA, Mastercard, or American Express payment only: Name (as it appears on the card): Type of card (circle): VISA Mastercard Card number: American Express Security code: Expiration date: Address of card: The last four issues of The Asian Reporter are available for pick up free at our office 24 hours a day at 922 N Killingsworth Street, Portland, Oregon. Back issues of The Asian Reporter may be ordered by mail at the following rates: First copy: $1.50 Additional copies ordered at the same time: $1.00 each Send orders to: Asian Reporter Back Issues, 922 N. Killingsworth St., Portland, OR 97217-2220 The Asian Reporter welcomes reader response and participation. If you have a comment on a story we have printed, or have an Asian-related personal or community focus idea, please contact us. Please include a contact name, address, and phone number on all correspondence. Thank you. ’ve heard that as parents, we live vicariously through our kids. While that may very well be true, I think I’ve taken it a step further. Apparently, as my son comes of age, I’ve managed to perfect time travel. A few weeks ago, I went to Tyler’s high school open house to meet with his teachers and see how he’s doing. Before I tell you about the open house, though, I should let you know a little about Tyler. He’s 17 years old, plays varsity tennis, watches what he eats, works out a lot, and has become a very good-looking young man. To give you a better idea, I can tell you what some lifelong friends said when they saw Tyler recently: “Tyler — You are so handsome! You look like a young version of your dad!” Now, you might think that, along with Tyler, I could also take that line as a compliment, but it’s hard to do when they’re referring to a specific version of me and make no mention of the current one. But let’s get back to the open house. So as we walk onto campus, Tyler sprints a few steps ahead of us. Within a few seconds, he is surrounded by three or four classmates, all girls, chatting him up, smiling as they walk to their classrooms. My first reaction was to wonder why Tyler felt he needed to spring ahead of his mother and I in the first place, but I figured that whatever the reason was, it would probably make me feel completely inadequate, so I decided to leave it alone. As their little group reached the class hallway, the girls dispersed and my wife and I were allowed to walk with him the rest of the way. Still curious, I decided to ask Tyler about his friends and get some insight as to who they were. Tyler’s answer was succinct and was very familiar to me based on any important question I’ve ever asked him: “I dunno.” Following the open house, and after seeing throughout the evening that Tyler was friendly with a number of girls at the school, I thought it might be a good time to sit down with him and have a heart-to-heart talk. Not about the “birds and the bees,” mind you, because at 17 years of age, he knows what goes where. It also wasn’t the talk about him needing to I “be a gentleman” now that he was of dating age. That wasn’t my concern. No, I felt it was time to have the “Here’s what you’ve got to do” talk. This is the talk where a father gleefully coaches his son on how to be wildly popular with the girls at school, and it always begins with the line, “Here’s what you’ve got to do.” For those who might not be aware, fathers who start off their talk with the line, “Here’s what you’ve got to do,” are almost always ignoring the fact that: 1. The lack of success meeting girls in their youth almost certainly doesn’t qualify them to provide advice now. 2. Any actual success they might have had in the past must now be amplified with wild exaggerations in order for the advice to have any plausibility now. That’s why time travel is so helpful. With time travel, I can conveniently erase memories like: 1. The time I took a date on a small sailboat at a neighborhood lake and got the boat stuck in a shallow area, requiring me to jump in with all my clothes and push the boat free. 2. The time I went to the county fair with a date for an entire day and then completely did not recognize her when she said hello at school the next day. In my defense, she was wearing her hair differently. 3. The time I drew a big valentine and left it in my girlfriend’s class just before she took an important exam for everyone to see, then later realized I had put it in the wrong classroom. 4. The time I went on a few dates with a girl and did not recognize her when we both showed up at a holiday party a couple months later. I imagine you’re sensing a pattern here, but in my defense, she was wearing her hair differently. Yet, despite these unfortunate events in my past, I must be qualified to impart some wisdom on the topic of dating, because I ended up marrying a beautiful and amazing woman. If I hadn’t done that, there would be no son for me to coach now. If you ask me, I’m a smooth operator and have every right to give the “Here’s what you’ve got to do” speech to my son. If you ask my wife, she’ll probably say she decided to marry me after I promised not to take her out on any more boats. Opinions expressed in this newspaper are those of the authors and not necessarily those of this publication. Wondering what events are going on this week? Check out The Asian Reporter’s Community & A.C.E. Calendar sections, on pages 10 and 12.
