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About Oregon City enterprise. (Oregon City, Or.) 1871-188? | View Entire Issue (Sept. 1, 1876)
' "T1 : ; w - ..' 1 - V ' s - .'. r ( ft 1 DEVOTED TO NEWS, LITERATURE, AND THE BEST INTERESTS OF OREGON. V OL. 10. THE ENTERPRISE. A LOCAL NEWSPAPER FOR THE Firmer, Business Man, k Family Circle. ISSUED EVERY FRIDAY. FRANK S. DEMENT, rBOrBIETOB AND PUBLISHES. OrriCIAL PAPERTOR CLACKAMAS CO. pprrrln ENTERPRISE Builcltnff, one J 2th3 "McnWing. Main St. Term of SnlmcrlpUoii t . tn Yfar. In Advance $2.50 glnf i wufj " Six Months 1.50 TeruM pt Advertising " . t A . - IntlnillnC iraniei ii. a cnnnn nftwdVO nil legal n. -.. r , i50 iin one wrote ... -- ....,., ii bsnupnt Insertion . " One Column, one year -jg- ,.. 120.00 01) 00 nnainesa Card, 1 squaro. one year 1-2.00 SOCIETY NOTICES. oki:c;ox i.oicii-J no. 3, 1. 1. o. i'.. Meets every 'llmrsnay evenin2t7U o ciock, m mo Odd Fellows Hall, Main MMilwrH of the Or der are invited to attend. Jly order kciuxca ii:ki:i: i)ic; NO. ..k...l .,! ill-Ill 1 llS- A-Ji dav evenings each month, gT3'X f 7'i o'cloirk. in tne una Fellows' Hall. Members of the Degree aro invited to attend. MULTNOMAH LOU CIS NO. 1, A.l & A. M., Holds its regular com- A iminications on the First and -gr Third Saturdays in earn month, at 7 o'clock from the 3Uh of Sep. tember to the 20tU of March; and 7'i oVlo.'k from thaOth of March to the Jfitlx of Soptemler. I'.rethren in gootl standing aro invited to attend. lv order of W. M. FAf.LS 11SCAMPMHXT NO. 1,1. O. O. V., Meet at Odd Fellows' Hall on the First and Third Tues fl:i nf Mch month. Patriarchs in good standing are invited to attend. It US I y H8 8 C A R D S. .1. V. NOIllilB, PHYSICIAN AND SVRGEON, r(),Hw IT-St:ilrs in Charman's P.rick, Wain Street. tf lR, .rOIIN WELCH d e ?i rrsT, --0: OFKICK IN ORRCOX CITY, OKKGOX. Hl-'t aU Price PaiJ f.ir Comity Orilnr. HUELAT & EASTHAM, ATTO RN E YS-AT-L A W POTtTIAXD hi Opit.'s new First street. OUKGOX CITY Charm a n's stair. sej brick, .".0 brick, u; tittf JOHNSON a McCOVVfJ ATTORNEYS C01WSEL0RS 1T-L.UV. Oregon City, Crogon. 7"VIU practice In nil tho Courts of t If tat. Special attention given to eases in the U. S. Land Onic at Oregon City. 5aprl872-tf. L. ,T. 15 AH IN ATTORNEY-AT-LAW, OREGON CITY, : : OREGON. Will State. practice In all the Courts of the Nov. 1. 1S7, tf JOHN M. KACOX, IMPORTER AND DEALER In Rooks, Stationery, Terfuni ry, etc., etc. Oregon City, Oregon. V.At the Tost Office, Main street, east aide. W. 11. HHJHFIELD. Established since '49. One door north of Pope' Hall. Main Mrcft, Oregon City, Oregon. A n assort ment of Watches. Jewel ry, inil S.-th Thomas' Weight Clocks I nt wVvlolt nrn ronwn..l 1 renresented. "Rpalrlns done on short not ice, and h ankful for past patronage. Caali p:tlil fjr County Oriler J. H. SHEPARD, I3oot and Slioe Store, t)ne door north of Ackerman Rros. Boots and shoes made and repaired as Cheap as the cheapest. Nov. 1. 1875 .-tf CIIAS. KNIG-IIT, CAN IY, OREGON, PHTSICIAN A NO DRUGGIST Prescriptions notlc. carefully filled at short ja7if. MILLER, MARSHALL &C0., OAT THE IIK1HEST PRICE FOR JL wheat, at nit ttmes, at the Oregon City Mills, And have on hand FEED and FLOUR Y sell, at market rates. Parties desiring reed, most furnish, sneks. nov!2tf IMPERIAL FY1 I LLS, LaRocque, SaTier & Co. Oregon City. lkridTmnnn.antlyI7-n,v,tf fr sale Flour, wS3SSi?SJ Jt?d nlck Parties purcliaalBfc feodmust furnish th aack- r TheChofcei Blue, Black, or Gray 1 BY ZAVARR VILMSI1CRST. Said Blue Eyes, " I will love vou Long as the heavens above vou Arch earth with azure hue"; Soft as the Mowers awaken Jieneath the breath of Spring, And sweet as rose-leaves shaken Their silver dewdrops lling III kisses rain on you." Said IJlack Eyes, ' I'll adore j-ou, Although the tempest o'er you Snatch hope and heaven from view ; When lightnings tear asunder The sky's red golden field When Uattle hurls his thunder, I'll make my breast 3-our shield, And die with joy for you." Said Gray Eyes, " I will love you, E'en though the skies above vou Turn bleak and dull as lead; Though youth and iy forsake .you, And life grow cold and drearj A heaven of love I'll make you, A thousand fold more ,'?ar, , When all but love isk-dtfuu," Was it Worth a It was in the autumn of the year 1782 that a surgeon of Boulogne, of tho name of Etienne Lefebvre, re ceived a letter, not bearing any sig nature, requesting him to repair on the following day to a country-house which was situated on the road lead ing to Calais, and to bring along such instruments us would be o re- quired for performing an operation L.efebvre was at that period well known as a distinguished and suc cessful operator ; so much so, in deed, that he was not nnfrequently sent for from great distances. He hail served for a considerable time in the navy, and his manners had, therefore, a certain degree of hlnnt- ness ; but, when j-ou once became acquainted with him, you could not help liking him for the natural and unaffected goodness of his heart. He was naturally som -what sur prised at this anonymous communi cation ; for, although the time and place were, as already stated, men tioned with great minuteness, there was no clew afforded by which tho writer could be identified. lie, therefore, came to the conclusion that some of his jocular friends were making fun of him, and he did not keep the appointment. Three days afterwards he again re ceived a similar summons, but couched in more pressing terms than the first, and he was informed that at 9 o, clock in the morning a car riage would be sent to bring him to the place where he was anxiously expected. Accordingly, next morn ing, sure enough, on the last stroke of 'J, a carriage drove up to his door. The doctor no longer made any hesi tation, but at once took his seat in tbe carriage. As he was getting in, he inquired of the coachman where he was to be taken to ; but the man. appeared either not to know, or did not choose to teli ; but, as In; spoke in English, Lefebrve said to himself, ' So it is an Englishman to whom I am summoned," and he accordingly prepared himself for an exhibition of eccentricity on the part of one of that nation which een now is so little understood by Continentals. At length the carriage stopped, and the docter hastened into the house. He was received at the entrance by a iine louking young man of about twenty-live vvars of age, who re quested him to walk into a large and handsome room on the lirst floor ins accent showed him to be an Englishman. The following conver sation then ensued between them : You have sent for me," said the doctor. 1 am very much obliged to you for the trouble vou have taken in coming here, rejoined the ,nirlish man. 44 lie so good as to seat your self at the table, where you will find chocolate, coffee, or wine, in caseyou would like to partake of anything before commencing the operation. " lint first show me the pat;ent. 1 wish to satisfy myself that an opera tion is absolutely necessary." It is necessary, Monsietir Lefe bvre ; pray bo seated." I have entire confidence. in yon ; only listen to me. Here is a purse containing 100 gni neas. whish I offer vou as a fee for the operation you are asked to per form, no matter what the result may bo. In case of j"our refusing com pliance with my request, you see this pistol, it is joaaeu, ana you are in my power. As I hope for salvation, I will blow your brains out. " Sir, I am not to be deterred from doing what I consider proper by any fear of your pistol. lint what do yon desire ? What am I expected to do?' " You must cut my right leg off." " With all my heart," answered tho surrreon. thiDkintr this was a characteristic specimen of those mad English; "and your hand, also, if necessary or desirable. However, unless! am greatly mistaken, your leg is perfectly sound. 1 saw you wulk down stairs with the greatest activity. What can be the matter with your leg?" " Nothing ; but it must come off. " Sir, you are mad." lhat is no concern of Monsieur Lefebvre." yours, W hat harm can that handsome limb have done ? Jsone at all ; still you must make up your mind to amputate it." "Sir. I have no acquaintance with you ; give me some proof that you in ftouua mina, naturally de manded the doctor. the doctor. 44 Will yon consent to my wishes, Monsieur Lefebvre?" ' As SOOn aS VOn can ncci'n-r. ow adequate or reasonable motive for so unnecessary an operation. x cannot at present enter into any explanations, m a year, per naps, x wm do. so. But I will bet you, sir, that then vou will edge that my" reasons for my present seemingly-extravagant conduct nro most. pure manly and. noble,, and. OREGON CITY, even rational." " It is quite impossible lor me," remonstrated the surgeon, " to com ply until yon tell me your name, place of residence, position and family." " You shall be made acquainted with all these particulars at some fnture time, but not at present. I beg you to consider me a man of honor." . " A man of honor does not utter unjustifiable threats against his doc tor. I have to perform a duty even towards you, who are a stranger to me. My reasons for refusing to accede to your absurd request are, as yon must admit, sound and just. Do yon wish to be the murderer of a large family ?" " Well, Monsieur Lefebvre," re plied the Englishman, taking up the pistol, " I will not fire nnon von. and J yet I will compel you to cut of ieg. vv uai you remse ilo to oblige me, through love of gain or fear of a bullet, you shall do through human ity." "4 How so, sir ?" 44 1 intend to shatter my leg with this pistol, and that, too, before your eyes, answered the Englishman, who accordingly seated himself, cocked the pistol, and then took deliberate aim at his knee-joint. Lefebvre rushed forward to pre vent him, but the Englishman coolly exclaimed : '4' Do not come near ; if you do, I fire. Xow only answer me this ques tion : Do you wish to prolong my 6nffering needlessly ?" 44 Sir, yon are mad," answered the doctor in despair; 4 but have your own way I am 'ready to do as you wish." Everything was ready for the op eration. As soon as the surgeon took up his instruments the English man lighted his cigar, and declared that he would smoke until tho ope ration was concluded. He kept his word. The lifelsss leg rested upon the floor, but the Englishman still smoked on. The operation had been performed in a most masterly man ner, and. thanks to Dr. Lefebvre 's skill and attention, the patient soon became perfectly recovered, al though, of course, he had to be sup plied with a wooden leg. He re warded the surgeon, whom he had earned to esteem more and more every day; thanked him with tears in ins eves for the great obligation under which he had laid him; and in a short time started for England. About two months after the pa- ient's departure the surgeon receiv- ed tho following letter from En; land. Inclosed you will receive a token of my boundless gratitude. a bill of exchange on mv banker in Paris for n,.r00 francs. Yon have render ed me the happiest of nif n by rid ding me of a limb which was an ob stacle in the wav of my happiness. Learn, then, the reason of w hat you termed my madness. Yon assured me that there could be no justifiable motive for so singular a mutilation. I offered 3 0U a wager, and I think yon were right in refusing it. After my second return from tho Last In dies, I became acquainted with Su san Black, the most accomplished and fascinating of wouk h. 1 sought her hand in marriage. Her fortune and family were such as met with the entire approbation of my parents. As for me, I thought only of her charms. I was soon happy enough to gain her affections, a fact which she did not attempt to deny;b it she, at the same time, firmly refused to become my wife. In vain did I be seech her to do so; in vain did her relations all second my desire. She was inflexible. For a long time I could not discover the reason of her opposition to a marriage which she herself confessed would make her happy; until, at last, one of her sis ters revealed the fatal secret to me. Susan was a marvel of beauty, but she was so unfortiinateas to have a wooden leg, and she had consequently con demed herself to eternal celibacy. My resolution was quickly formed, and I determined to become like her. Thanks to yon my dear Lelebvre, my wishes weie soon accomplished. I hastened to gain information of Miss Black. The report had been spread, and I myself had taken care to write to my friends in England to the same effect, that I had the mis fortune to fracfnre my leg, and that amputation had been found abso lutely necessary. Every one express ed the greatest concern at my mis fortune. Susan fainted on the first occasion of my presenting myself. She was for a long time inconsol able, but at length she consented to become my wife. It was only on the morning after our marriage that I confessed to her the sacrifice by means of which I had at length been enabled to gain her consent to be mine. The avowal increased her love. Oh! my excellent friend, had I ten legs to lose, I would give them all up for the sake of my beloved Susan. So long as I live, rely on ray gratitude. If ever you visit England, do not fail to come here, so that I make you acquainted with my wife; and then, tell me whether or not I was out of my senses. Yours, faithfully, Asthuk Oxlet. Monsieur Lefebvre answered the letter of his English friend in the following terms: Sir: Accept my best thanks for your very general present, for so I must term what you have sent me, having been previously magnificent ly remunerated for my trouble, as you were pleased to term it. I wish you, as well as your charming wife, all imaginable" happiness.' True it is that to give a leg in exchange for . beautiful, tender, and virtnous wife is not too much, provided the happiness endures. Adam sacrificed one of his ribs to become possessed of our common mother Eve, and morn than one man. has laid down OREGON, FRIDAY; SEPT. 1, 1876. his life for the sake of his beloved. Notwithstanding all this allow me to adhere to my former opinion. For the present yon are doubtless right, for yon are now in the honeymoon; but at some future time you will ac knowledge the truth of what I ad vanced. I beg your attention to what I am about to say. I fear that in two years you will repent of hav ing your leg amputated above the knee-joint. You will think that to have it cut off lower down would have been quiet sufficient. In three years you would ba pursuaded that the sacrifice of a foot would have answered all purposes; in four, that of the big toe; in five, the little one; and, at last, you will jhave confessed that to have parted with a nail, with out necessity, would . have b?en a piece of egregious folly. All this I assert without in the slightest degree Impugning tho merit of of your ad mirable helpmate. In my own youthful days I would have, at any time, given my life for my mistress, but never my leg, for I should have feared repentance for the rest of my days. Had I really done so, I should have every moment said to myself, "Lefedvre you are a madman." With highest consideration, yours very obediently. Etiexxe Lefebvre. In the year 1793, during the Ileign of Terror, the surgeon of Bolcgne, having, been accused of being an aristrocrat by one of hig younger professional brethern who envied him his practice, was obliged to take refuge in London, in oi-der to save his neck from the guillotine. Being without employment or acquaintan ces, he inquired for the residence of his former patient, Mr. Oxley. He was directed to it, and, on arriving at the house, he sent up his name, and was immediately admitted. In a huge arm-chair, seated before the fire, with a bottle of wino beside him, sat a portly personage, whose size was so great that it vas with difficul ty that lie could rise to welcome hi'. visitor. "Welcome, Monsieur Lefe vre," exclaimed the huge English man. "Do not be offended at my receiving you in this manner, but my cursed wooden leg - won't allow me to do anything. You have come, no doubt, my friend, to see if in the long run you were not right." 44I am a fugitive seeking an asylum among you." "You shall stay with me, for you aro real y a wise man. Yon will console me. Do you know my dear Lefebyre, that, had it not been for this abominable wooden leg render ing me unless, I should by this time have been Admiral of the Bine. I spend my life in reading tho news papers, and in curses that I am tied here when everybody else is up and doing. Ilcmaiii here; you shall comfort me." "Your charming wife can doubt less do that better than I can." "Oil, as for that, no. Her wood en leg prevents her from gadding about and dancing; so she has, a re source, given herself up to cards and scandal. There is no possibility of living alone with her; in other re spects she is a good .enough woman." "wnau was x rignt, tnen.' ex claimed the surgeon. "Oh, a thousand times, my dear Lefebvre but say no more on that subject. I was an unutterable fool. If I bad my leg back again. I would noi pari with the paring ot a single nail. Between 01 rself, I must have been crazy; but keep that to y ou rsel f . " En 'j UsJi Magazine. Kissing in Austria is perhaps justly regarded as too serious a mat ter to be trifled with on the stage An ii-usirain manager would be as much surprised at seeing the lover in a play kiss Ins beloved in earnest, a; at seeing uie villain in a play stab his victim in earnest Hence a scandal, the other night, at the imperial opera. A handsome tenor, Bastiano Widmann, having to kiss t!.e sophrano, Signorina Giov anni, Lortzing's opera of the "Ar monrer," that lady at the rehearsal i ll . . . . requested mm to "make believe in the correct Vieennese manner. In sieaa 01 which, wuen the proper mo ment came at the first performance, tho handsome tenor plumply and resonantly kissed the artonished so phrano upon her rosy lips. Signo- rino (jriovanm, after the curtain fell. went in a pretty rage to the manager and complained. The manager sent for the handsome tenor and reqested him to restrain his ardor for the fu ture on pain of a worse thing. When the second representation took place, Signorina Giovanna, dis trusting him, exclaimed, loud enough for the horse to hear, "1 will excuse you from the kiss." The handsome tenor, incensed at the in suit, responded in a stage whisper, 44 Thank God for that 1 Who wants to kiss such an old thing!" The house sat appalled. Signorina Gio 9 1 SY . . vunm nounceu on me stage, and tne handsome tenor has been bidden apologize or abscond. Vaxdebbilt b Wisxrxo at Whist - commodore vanuerimt. says a Aew ioik irwnne reporter, 4 was always very fond of cards, whist and l 1 1 , -M- . point eucnre. ne never played po ker or gambled at the faro table. I asked him once as to the larg amount of money he ever made at whist, and he said that whe : the Southern men were in their glory he r cr rrr won zu.uuu in one day. These are the cholera mixture days, when the unripe watermelon makes its periodical visitation and seems to forget that a man s stomach isn't" ball room. A Philadelphia fashion writer has the audacity to print apropos of low AlA4 corsages, mat noi one woman in a hundred bas a neck, and shoulders worth showing. The Queer Case of "Orpheus C. Jicrr. A correspondent of the Chicago Tribune writes from New York : You know R. C. Newell, who under the non de nlume of " Orpheus C. Kerr," has furnished the country with some of its richest and most pungent; humorous literature du- mg the last fifteen years i ion re member his famous letters from the Mackerel Brigade " during the 11 war, ond how his comicaiiy saga cious criticisms convulsed the army and molded public opinion ? Col- fox and Frank Carpenter, and tbe Rev. D. Neill, the entertaining par son, like to tell how "Old Abe" went around with Newell s book in his pocket repeating its shrewd allego ries and reading its fun to command ing generals and Cabinet officers, and especially how " he once gave Grant a lesson from it. Well" New ell is now in a bad wav, and unless there is a radical c ange he cannot live a month. Since closing lus de licious and pop alar "Social Studies" in the World, three years ago, he has been on the working editorial force of the Graphic, editing the weekly and contributing sketches and humorous poems to the daily. He has not been absent from his desk a day in a vear. but for the past twenty-seven dayshe haseaten nothing whatever. I mean just this. It will be four weeks to-morrow since a mouthful or a crumb of food passed his lips! Dur ing that' time he has lost thirty pounds of flesh, and now, though five feet 10 inches in height.he weighs only 102 pounds. He has drank one cup of coffee every morning, and has taken a small gl ss of milk punch every other day, and this has been his entire nourishment, unless his two daily cigars may be supposed to have nutritions qualities. His con dition is getting to be a problem for t- e doctors, especially when it is added that he walks a mile and a half every day, 0:1 his way to the office and back, anddrivesont two or three times a week with his fine hors . Ile'is very weak, but has no feeling of faintness or hunger, and is cheerful as the sun. Newell is a man of forty, and has independent means. His habits have always been rigidly temperate. His family are profoundly alarmed at his condition, but he declares that he cannot eat. There as obvi ously no physical impediment, as in the case of hydrophobia, for he can swallow as easily as ever, and promises his friends that he will try to eat. and accordingly sits down to every meal; and even puts morsels-to his lips, but then, without nausea, there comes what he calls 44 nervous revolt," and the food is rejected. Yamlerbilt's Fortune. The New York Tribune has been some trustworthy trying to obtain estimate of Commodore "Vanderbilt's wealth, but without success. Cur rent rumors for several ye rs as cribed fabulous wealth to Astor, Stewart and Vanderbilt. The for tunes were said to exceed $80,000,- 000 each, and were popularly sup posed to reach $100,000,000. But this is a very large sum of money. and few people stopped to think what was meant by $100,000,000. Mr. Astor was worth in all, not more than from $45,000,000 to $50,000,000, and Mr. Stewarts fortune did not exceed $25,000,000. Those acquaint ed with his business affairs know that he was constantly carrying a heavy margin of indebtedness on his purchases not beyond his ability to carry, and not sufficient to embarass him but materially lessening the aggregate worth of his estate on a final settlement and winding up or his affairs. Mr. Vanderbilt has not needed to own a majority of the stock of the New York Central and Hudson River Railroads. It has been suffi cient for him and his sons, with a few ch: sen friends, to control $40,- 000.000 of tlie stock. Had his death not been so long anticipated this valuable property would probably be subjected to the fluctuations of the market for a time after his demise, and a forced sale of the stock would not yield the figures at present quoted on the market, but his best friends do not anticipate anything like a convulsion. In view of this contingency, it is understood in the inner circle of the Commodoie s ac quaintance that he has disposed of his immense interest in the stock to his sons, which will effectually pre vent a panic and keep the control of the roads in the hands of those who have so long managed them. Mr. Vanderbilt will not let the public into the secret of hismisfortnne. He is willing enougn 10 oe considered worth SIOO.000,000, but the exact figures never will be known outside of his family if he can avoid it. The actual value of his estate cannot even be estimated with any certainty. To say that he is worth from forty to sixty millions of dollars is as near as any outsider can get at it. A c orrespondent says : ''Sundown chapeanx are very ugly and should only be worn by those who possess a prettv, youthful face. Now, the question arises who is to be the judge of those faces, and if every wo man is to be her own judge , then wont every woman wear a chapeaux ? Grounds of Argument. '-'dith : 1 - . A say, ltegy, now is it mat one 01 our cows is brown and and the other white? Reginald: Why, you silly any one knows that. It's the white cow that gives the milk and the brown cow that gives the coffee. A Kentucky schoolmaster whose wife was one of his pupils had occa sion to punish her one day. The next day the schoolhouse door bore this inscription; "School closed for one week ;, schoolmaster ill." A Turkish Joe Sffller;- The Turks, grave and majestic, as they are often supposed to be, have a traditional Joe Miller, one Nasr Eddin, commonly called Nasr-Eddin-Hodja (i. e., the abbe, or half priest, half teacher) . And just as there was a real Joe Miller, who was more or less, in some sense or other, the origin of the jest-book named after him, so there seems to have been an actual Nasr-Eddin, who lived in the days of Timour the Tartar, or Tamer lane, (a.d. 1335-1405) him of the one eye and the game-leg and who dared to jest with the terrible soldier, even to his face. Now that it looks more than ever as if tlie Turks were to be dislodged out of the encampment they have so long occupied in Christendom, there is a certain propriety in remember ing once more anything characteristic of them ; and this ancient' collection of jests is worth something as show ing that, barbarious as they are, they had some tincture of the mirthful ness which is so important a common bond of man to man. If they enjoy fun, there must be something good in them. The best known story of Nasr Eddin is often found in collections of anecdotes ; it is that of his thrice fooling the assembly of true be lievers out of a sermon by three successive jocular replies. The first time he ascended the pulpit, he said, " O true believers ! do yon know what I am going to say ?" They re plied, 44 No." Whereupon he asked, 44 Of what use to preach to such ignoramuses ?" and came down from the pulpit. The next time, when he asked the same question, they answered, 44 Yes, we know." Whereupon, he said, 44 Then it is useless for me to tell you ;" and came down. The third time, having taken coun sel together, the congregation pre pared an answer which they thonght would corner their joker-preacher, and said, 44 Some of us know, and some don't." Whereupon he prompt ly replied, 44 Let those who know, tell those who don't;" and ence more came down. This is an easier way to savo sermon-writing than exchange. Some of the stories about Nasr Eddin are too much of a bar-room kind for general society, and some (also omitted in this account) are rather flat ; but taken together they represent the Hodja as a curious parallel, partly to Joe Miller and partly to such historical buffoons as Archie Armstrong, Will Sommers, Tarlton. and their facetious frater nity, who were, perhaps, all of them, full as foolish as funny. There is also an odd similarity in some of these stories to the Irish sort of jokes called 44 bulls." Thus, the Hodja dreamed one night that he was offered nine aspers for something, but demanded ten ; and upon this being allowed., he demanded nineteen, but woke up ust at that point ; and perceiving hat there was neither cash nor cus tomer, he turned over and shut up lis eyes, saying, " Oh. well, my riend, give me nine, then." This is exactly the case of the rishman who dreamed that the Pope offered him either cold punch or jot ; and having chosen the latter, and having waked np before the servant came back with the hot water, he told" his dream, adding. with much sincerity, 44 And now it's thronbling me that I didn't take it cowld."- -Editor's Drawer, in Har per s Magazine jor aeptemoer. A Frenchman's Contest with Enjrllsh. Our readers have doubtless heard of the Frenchman who so sadly mis used shall and wi7. Falling in a river ho cried out, 44 1 tcill drown; nobodv sliall help me." But it is lard work for many to whom Eng- ish " comes by nature," to use these words correctly. Another Frenchman was sorely pnzzled by the usual English saluta tions. In 1 rench the ordinary salu tation is " Comment vou8 portez-vous?" iterally, How do you carry your self? It is significant of national character, for deportment, or one's physical carriage, is very important in i ranee. A friend one day asked this Frenchman, who had begun to speak English " How do you do? " "Do vat?" " I mean how do you find your- sen?" ' Saire, I never loses myself." "Eut how do you ft el ?" " Smooth ; you just feel me." If I were to have only one blessincr and no more in tins world, and were .... to be asked what it should be. should answer, without hesitation. cungeuiai companions, mere is no trouble such companionship cannot suneu, ijo joy ir, cannot; increase I he poorest dwelling the most meagre fares, shared with people whose thoughts are one's own. catch one s meaning at once, and enjoy tbe came thing, would be better than al ine luxuries the world could give snared oy those whoe presence is disagreeable to us. They may be ever so good bet ler than one's self even but that don't mend the matter. It is thing impossible to help in any way What can you do if you love mn Bic and the other hates it ? If gay assemblages and innocent amuse ments please one. and the solitude o a hermitage another? If this sees tbe ludicrous side of every question, ana that take everything in solemn seri ousness ? If, when one makes a joke the other asks, gravely, "Do you think Tthat ?" Doleful are the. hours the two must pass together, and miserable are their lives if bound by ties that cannot be broken. NO. 45. Attractiveness in Women. Personal' atttwtlons most girl possess, at any rat& in a sufficient degree to render them attractive to somebody;" for although there mre standards of beauty, yet these do not prevail with all people. The follow ing sensible article from a leading paper in the West j. will appiy to the ladies here as well as to the women of the locality for which the article was intended :: '"There is something wonderful in' the difference of aspect which the same face wears to differ ent beholders. Probably the philo sophical explanation of this is that which is hidden from all becomes immediately -atsd instinctively ap parent to the eye of lore. How can a moderately good-looking girl in crease her attractions ?. By culture. She musk cultivate- br mind. An ignorant, illiterate woman, even if she attracts- attention, cannot retain the interest of an' intelligent man, She most do this by reading, by study,, reflection, and by familiar conversation with the best and most highly educated persons with whom she comes in contact. Hilt the hearrt must be cultivated as well as the head. " Of all things," exclaimed an elegant and refined gentleman 44 of all things, give me softness and gentleness in woman." A harsh voice, a coarse laugh ; trifles like these have suddenly spoiled many a favorable impression The cultiva tion of the-heart? mnst: be real, not feigned.- A' woman who studies to appear rather to be good and gener ous, seldom succeeds in deceiving the other sex in these respects. She who in truth seeks earnestly to pro mote the happiness of those aronnd her is very apt- soon to obtain ad mirersamong men. Above all other requisites in a- woman is conscien tiousness. Without this one touch stone of character, no matter what her charms aud acquirements, sho cannot expect to command the lasting regard of any man whose love i worth having." Jersey Cattle. The London Agricultural Gazette strikes the following, hard blows at those who value color as a mark of pure blood : If the value of Jersey stock is to rest on color, deterioration will sure ly follow of those useful qualities that are far more noticeable in the good, old-fashioned, parti-colored cow, than that which will be found among the generality of fine, high. bred, whole-colored fawns, grays, or foxey, so-called Jerseys, I have owned hundreds of-acclimated Jersey stock, and have never, as a rule, found the whole-colored such larger producers- as- many parti-colored ones ; in tact, oyiar tne most ontter- producing cow T ever possessed was not only parti-colored, but the most ugly and ungainly beast oz tne lot, yet her stock- have never failed to show their butter-making qualities. The true type of a Jersey cow is, in fact, an animal that will not make meat. I do not say that this is not improved upon by acclimatization and a slight introduction of a har dier breed, of which what are teamed Chichester Jerseys are the best de scription. Neither do I say that Jersey breeders 011 the island itself have not in some instances a breed that shows a disposition to make some flesh,-and very probably s may then be following up the require ments of fashion, yet I maintain that pure Jersey should throw the bulk of her feeding qualities into butter, and with little to flesh. The parti-colored Rood cow may have but a white spot, especially under the belly, but throughout the bodr the rich, yellow skin, under any col ored hair, will be found black. white or fawn. I have seen the com mencement of a whole-colored herd, the property of a noble dulre, to ob tain which I have seen wealthy and large-producing cows sold off to pre vent an animal remaining with the slightest stain of other than one color. Remarkable Self-Sacrifice. This (says the Boston Globe J is a true story. The happy circum- . stances occurred on last Sunday eve ning. He estrortet her to ana from church, and upon arriving at her home their discussion of the sermon and the extreme heat suggested an invitation, readily accepted by Charles, that they step into the house and partake of a cooling glass ol lemonade. She led him to the dining-room, and there found naughty brother Ben about to squeeze the last lemon in the house for his own individual benefit! Calling him aside she induced Ben, by means of sun dry threats and promises, to dissect that lemon and make Charlie and herself a glass. A self-sacrificing thonght stroek herf " No, Ben," said she, " put the jiiice of the whole lemon into Charlie's glass and bring me a glass- of waterv He won't no tice it, there's no light in the par lor !" Ben was making one good, strong lemonade,- as- directed, when Charlie quietly slipped at and re marked: "I say, Ben F put the juicer of your entire lemon in your sister's glass and bring me some ice-water, there is no light in the parlor, and she won't notiee it!" Ben's forte i in obeying orders. With- a merry twinkle in his eye he draak the lem onade, then carried them each a glass of water, which they drank witb much apparent relish, asking eaeb other between sips "if it was sweet enough TT And naughty brother Ben, with the taste of that lemonade in his month, stood out in the hall and langhed till his sides ached, to hear tbem assure each other that it was just right!" and so refreshing!" 'so palatabU