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About Spilyay tymoo. (Warm Springs, Or.) 1976-current | View Entire Issue (July 20, 1995)
SpilyayTymoo Alcoholism, drug addiction cause woman to lose more than self-respect, -identity r -t. .... -i .'i -i j L- i tV.k Mn nna rtii1i4 nirk nn m while 3 owns, successes and failures shape a lifetime, I was drunk. I had the courage to stand up sometimes for tlie better, sometimes for Hie for myself. But in the long run, I was too worse. Many individuals become powerless ashamed to face those people because of victims by merely being in the wrong place at the stupid things I did or said while I was the wrong time having no tools with which to drinking that bottle or can of courage. manage adversity, iucn is tne story you are mm una w mnjr i u i The abuse began when she was 7 or 8. "I have forgiven him. He's doing his own suffering now. I'm pretty sure he has regrets about it." about to read. The individual will re main anonymous, through necessity, for fear of serious personal injury. All tliatwillbe told about her identity is that site is a 28-year-old tribal member and a life long resident of the reservation. In her relatively short life, "Tina", as she will be referred to, has learned that above all, honesty is the only way to sur vive; the only way iobevinthehealing process that will hopefully help her to overcome the many losses she has faced. She also tells her story to help others maybe, just maybe, she says, someone will read it and take a closer look at their lifestyle. Tina was bom in 1967. Her life as a child was "decent", she says. Decent is a generous word considering she was sexually molested by two family mem bers when she was seven or eight. The molestation lasted for about a year, Tina remembers. "I tried to tell my mom but I was threatened and beat up. I have for given him. He's doing his own suffering now...I'm pretty sure he has regrets about it." As a grade school student at Warm Springs Elementary, Tina "didn't fit in" with her classmates. "I was always made fun of, and beat on by them." Tina feels tuio mA tVio mnloctaHnn mav have been the beginning of her downward spiral, things people prob- "Since then, I haven't really like myself. I ably wouldn't miss." was a loner throughout my school years Tina would sell or with low self-esteem, no friends and low hock items for what grades." money she could get I was a dropout and started in Alternative "Although I was probably discovered by i t: n AtU.u-. Aittarant rwrsrns. thev told me nothing. members to alcohol. "After so many years of drinking and see ing so many lives taken because of drinking, I slowed down." However, there is a more powerful an tidote for pain co caine. "I was intro duced to cocaine when I was 21 while doing some labor work. I loved outdoor work and I also loved my kids, a lot. As my use of coke increased, the interest in my work and responsi bilities decreased." At first, the cocaine was offered to her at a re duced cost or even free. "I was working by now so what little cost the cocaine was didn't matter. I could afford what I used and I made sure that I had plenty of friends who would share their cocaine with me if I didn't have the money....Soon those friends ran out too." The ever-increasing need for a fix and a higher high far out weighed all sanity and reasonableness and controlled every aspect of her life. She began stealing to support her habit. "Little things at nrst, "I tried to stay away from the coke but I couldn't. I dumped everything for ;he new love of my life-cocaine." my life, cocaine....I thought of these things when I was snorting my last quarter, u.. awani uiinHnur in mv hnnse wondering to myself 'Why the hell did you do it again? $500 in one day and nothing to show for it.'" Remorse, shame and guilt pepper Tina's life. She knows she is ultimately responsible for her own actions and must face the consequences. "I was full of guilt and shame, telling myself 'no more'." They were empty words, empty prom ises. She has said these same words many times and expects to say them again. She has entered treatment centers four different times but could not stay straight. She was 22 or 23 when she entered her first treatment center. She entered the last one when she was 27. She completed three of the four sessions. "I would end up by myself again thinking the same thoughts again." If someone really wants to change, they can. "Some will tell their counselors half-truths and say what they think the counselor wants to hear," says Tina. This helps no one. "Treatment is for someone who want to learn something about themselves and to try something different." She feels treatment should be reserved for those Iwho really want to change, not because; they have to. Coming down off the drug was "very depressing," and painful for Tina. "I was ; v tired of my way ; of life but I was v X afraid to die." JvTina has at- V tempted suicide i; many different V times. "Luckily, I V didn't succeed." ,: Tina also feels v anger toward V herself and her v dealer. "On more whpn t AiA fraH mv food use anv more. Someone was released on stamps, the cocaine was doubled in price, a weekend pass and the inmates were all because food stamps were not cash." anxious for the person to get back, be Tina has discovered one important cause heshe would have drugs. I prayed thine she is not alone in her troubles, for strength to not usc.It worked, be- . .. a . l "Throughout all my alcohol and drug experiences, I thought I was the only one going through this here in Warm Springs. I thought I was a no-good person, that I didn't deserve any better. But I know I'm not the only one....There are many, many others who are in the same boat. We spend $50, $100, $500 a day on our coke habits." More importantly, Tina has discovered that she is not the only one who is seeking refuge from a self destructive lifestyle. Trouble follows Tina. She lost her mother a few years ago. "Then I was kicked out of my house. I found my boyfriend with an other woman, my best friend was having her own problems. I was, again, all alone. I had hit my bottom. That's when I realized I had to do something for me, tor my kias. "I say a prayer to keep the drugs away from me, a prayer for my.... friends, my family, my kids, myself." cause the person didn't come back to: jail." i Tina has a limited support system. She ; relies heavily on her counselor at the' Community Counseling Center and; prayer. But, she feels she has no best, friend on whom she ; can rely when' things get really; tough. Lack of self esteem has also led Tina into abusive; relationships. Men; have beat her up! and verbally; abused her. "I would push and push until my man would beat me. Then, he would feel really bad and be gin to cry and then treat me nice." It; was the one way; she knew she could get positive attend tion from her mate As she looks; back on her life, Tina feels her diseased began when "I was very young, not too; long after I was sexually molested. You Tina has developed a sense of self- see, it begins with the children. My goal is appreciation. She must continually "con- to fight this disease, to learn to be respon- vthan one occa- sion, while in Madras, shop ping for grocer , ies, with what little money or :t food stamps I $ had left, I would I almost go into a rage, seeing my drug dealers there loading up with carts and carts of vince" herself that she is a "good person, a human being, a mother, daughter, sis ter, friend." She no longer wants to use nor does she want to be "sitting there alone again, with no money. I am learn ing to separate myself from my drug ad dictive behaviors. Now and then, I do cuss myself out, beat myself up. Then I think about it. I think about my drug life and, that if I keep putting myself down, I'll go right back to drugs, looking for a false happiness." beli-douDt ana pegin- sible, to teach my kids, to let my kids know I'm here for them so they won't turn to a false hope and happiness as I did." ; Tina has learned, also, that she needs to take care of herself, to "grow up, to forget, and to forgive myself and others." She feels one must learn from the past and then forget it "I have to forgive my self and stop beating myself up about past actions such as stealing and lying. J must forgive my mends and the tamuies nine to return to her old irresponsible who have done wrong to me and stop o .. . . , . n. - a cu f.,i iu klrt FHi iraHon on the reservation." At 16 years of age, Tina was introduced to pot. "It helped me to feel better, or so I thought. I never did accomplish anything at all for the next four years." Tina used the AE classes as an excuse to get out of the house ;"just to get stoned." Then, when she was 19, she was introduced to alcohol. "It ' gave me the courage, or so I thought, to utt l fw mi nnfhinr trrnrpries. Thev had new cars, vans, pick- They didn't know how to approach me," ups and their kids had new clothes, new ' i ...J., -.rJ nrn " Whia Tina Inst eave Tina. Tina has had a hard time understand ing drug addiction and its affect on her. "I thought I was going crazy. Why did I neglect my responsibilities? I tried to stay away from the coke but I couldn't. I dumped my kids, my family, my job(s) gave me uic uuuiagc, niv.ng"v 1 face up to people and tell them what I and my self-respect for the new love of tnvs. eandv and vov." What Tina lost, somebody else gained. "I thought of my family and my kids who had nothing to eat. I cursed the dealer and their family, for they were robbing me and my family of the things we could have had. I spent all of my money onmy dealer for my drug. I even exchanged my food stamps behaviors are "warning signs of my next fix' Tina says. Though not a particularly religious person, Tina has turned to God for help more than once. "I say a prayer, a prayer to keep the drugs away from me, a prayer for my drug addicted friends, for my family, for my kids, for myself." Tina says she often feels unworthy of prayer, that "please" is the hardest word to utter when she is in need. A recent stay at the Warm Springs jail was particularly memorable for Tina. She says "drugs are easier to get inside of the jail than it is outside....I used when first in jail. But drugs were the reason I was in jail and I didn't want to Need help? Call the Community Counseling Center at 553-3205 using it as an excuse." She feels the help she needs will come through intensive counseling and the "good Lord above."i Tina sees drug addiction and alcohol; ism spreading fast, "infecting the young and old," alike. "It's not just cocaine, but prescription medications" as well. ; What the future holds for Tina is un clear. The bright spots in her life she tends to downplay include the fact she has her GED, the fact that she is not on public assistance, taking in the "free money" as she calls it, and the fact that she has been clean for two weeks. Her goal is to go to school at Lane Community College. "I don't know if I'll ever do it." There is concern among community members that once someone does go to treatment, the person must come home to the same destructive environment. There is no safe place in Warm Springs for those who have stopped abusing. Tina's advice to the Warm Springs community: "Be a team. Do not criticize or punish the per son but help them. Encourage them." New BIA fingerprint service offered ! Thanks to a newly established Bureau of Indian Affairs service, In- dian tribes and schools can now bet I ter protect their children by using a ' fingerprint service that will detect ' the past criminal history of prospec ; tive and newly hired employees. "We are very pleased to announce ; this important and needed new ser ; vice, which will help to ensure the i safety and well-being of our Indian ' children, says Assistant Secretary for Indian Affairs Ada E. Deer. : The BIA's Division of Law En forcement services has hired Secu ' rity Specialist Kay Hayes to serve as its liaison with the Federal Bureau of ; Investigation background checks through the fingerprint service can contact Hayes at the Division of Law ' Enforcement Services, Operational ' Support Branch, PO Box 66, Albu ' querque, NM 87103 (The office is located at 123 Fourth Street SW, Room 217, in Albuquerque). The ; current cost for each fingerprint search is $22. Information about procedures and training is available by calling Hayes at (505) 766-8000, fax (505) 766 1425. "This is a great opportunity for tribes to comply easily with The Indian Child Protection and Family Violence Prevention Act (Public Law 101-630) and the Crime Control Act of 1990, Child Care Worker Em ployee Background Checks (Public Law 101-647)." says Ted Quasula, the director of the BIA's Division of Law Enforcement Services. Under the Crime Control Act, each Federal agency and facility, including those operated under contract, are required to perform a fingerprint check for each existing and newly hired em ployee who provides child care ser vices to Indian children (under the age of 1 8). The FBI fingerprint search includes a check of past state crimi nal history. However, the FBI search does not include local or tribal crimi nal histories. Pharmacy procedures explained SpUyay Tymoo Publisher: Sid Miller Editor: Donna Behrend ReporterPhotographer: Saphronia Katchia ReporterPhotographer: Selena T.Boise ReporterPhotographer: Bob Medina Secretary: TinaAguilar Founded in March 1976 SpUyay Tymoo is published bi-weekly by the Confederated Tribes of Warm Springs. Our offices are located in the basement of the Old Girl's Dorm at 1 1 15 Wasco Street Any written materials to Spilyay Tymoo should be addressed to: Spflyay Tymoo, P.O. Box 870, Warm Springs, OR 97761 (503) 553-1644 or 553-3274 - FAX No. 553-3539 Annual Subscription Rates: Within U.S. - $9.00 Outside US. -$ 1 5.00 Spilyay Tymoo 1995 With the move to the new Warm Springs Health and Wellness Center in October 1993 the pharmacy de partment has undergone some changes. Hopefully we can answer a few of the questions you've had. Q. How do I get cold medicine from the pharmacy? A. There are forms located on a table outside the pharmacy. Fill out the names and chart numbers of the family members who need medicine and drop the paper in the slot. This form can be used for non-prescription medicine only such as Tylenol, cold medicine, diarrhea medicine, diabetic supplies, antacids, bacitra cin ointment (for minor scrapes) and athlete's foot cream. You still need to bring your chart to the pharmacy to obtain any medications prescribed by your doctor and some non-prescription medications such as insu lin, Mycelex-y and hydrocortisone cream. Q. I don't like to wait a long time for medication refills, what is the quickest way for me to get my medicine? A. Call a day ahead! You can call our medication refill hotline at 553-2475 24 hours a day and leave your full name and the medication you need. Or you can call the clinic at 553-1 196 and ask for the pharmacy department to tell us what you need. We prefer that you call a day ahead (before you run out of your medi cine) so that we can be certain to have your medicine ready. This only works if the doctor authorized refills for you. Otherwise you may need to see the doctor to get more medicine. Q. Do I need my chart to get Nix? A. No, just come to the pharmacy and give us the names of all house hold members that need to be treated. We will then supply you with enough Nix for everyone. Q. Do you fill prescriptions writ ten by doctors who don't work at the clinic? A. If we have the medicine in our pharmacy we will fill your prescrip tion. If we do not stock the medicine and you were referred to an outside doctor and you are eligible for out side care, we will pay for the medi cine in town. If we do not stock the medicine and we did not refer you to an outside doctor we will not be able to fill or pay for your prescription. Q. How long will you keep my medicine in the pharmacy if I can not pick it up right away? A. We keep your medicine for 5 working days. If it is not picked up by then we will cancel the medicine and send your chart back to medical records. If your medicine has been canceled, bring your chart to phar macy and if appropriate we will reis sue the medicine to you. Can you believe it? Dr. Tom Creelman has practiced medicine in Warm Springs 20 years! Celebrate with him and the Health and Wellness Center staff Friday, July 21 at a barbecue and open house beginning at 12 noon. Community members are encouraged to attend, share a meal and a story or two! Kah-Nee-Ta Highway crash claims two . : , - " ' ' ". . -4 . i - . " I I - if' , r 1 ' . ! ' . . " ; ' - ' ... ... - - - - t , - 1 J ' . ' -v ' , . . - ' " . ' . ; . ' - "" " - 1 - 4 '' ' ' t ..... A June 24 accident claimed the lives of two children. On Saturdav. June 24th. 1995 at noon, officers of the Warm Springs Police Department were dispatched to Hwy 3, also known as the Kah-Nee-Tah Hwy., and Upper Drycreek Road for a motor vehicle crash. A Plymouth mini-van, driven by 33-year-old Gerald Hoptowit, Sr. of Warm Springs, was north bound on Highway 3 when he attempted to make a left turn onto Upper Drycreek Road. As he made the turn the ve hicle was struck on the passenger side by a south bound Nissan pickup driven by 41 -year-old Mohammed Fani of Seattle, Washington. Another passenger in the mini van three year-old Gerald Hoptowit Jr., and the driver, Gerald Hoptowit Sr. were transported By Warm Springs Fire and Safety to ML View Hospital in Madras. Monammed Fani and his wife Judith were also taken to Mt View Hospital but were later transferred to SL Charles Medical Center in Bend. The cause of the crash is still un der investigation by members of the Warm Springs Police Department, Bureau of Indian Affairs, FBI, and the Oregon State Police.
