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About Eugene weekly. (Eugene, Oregon) 1993-current | View Entire Issue (Jan. 18, 2007)
Savage Love Abbreviations: A Asian • B Black • Bi Bisexual • C Couple • Ch Christian • D Divorced • F Female • G Gay • H Hispanic HWP Height/ Weight proportionate • J Jewish • M Male • NA No alcohol • NAm Native American • ND No drugs • NS No smoking P Professional • S Single • W White • Wi Widowed • ISO In search of • LTR Long-term relationship Participants in Eugene Weekly Personals must be 18 years or older. To ensure your safety, carefully screen all responses. First meetings should occur in a public place and participants should not divulge addresses. Eugene Weekly does not screen or investigate individuals who place or respond to personals ads and makes no representation as to the character of these individuals. Eugene Weekly will not be responsible for the consequences of any interaction. Not all voice boxes contain voice greetings. DEW...YES, YOU! I WANT TO BE KEPT WANTS IT WIDE Miss you bad! Love U, not only when your sleeping, but always! Think about you every day, still checking my bushes for U. Ha Ha. I need you..Love Me! ☎ 9484 I’m ready to be spoiled by a real gentleman. Lonely? Need a change? I love dates, romance, sensual touches. Must be hand- some, kind, very generous, goal oriented, financially secure, active, 30+. Take care of my bills, I’ll take care of you! I’m kind, pretty, sensual, 40, classy, ready for something new! ☎ 9555 WM, 47, 5’11, 195lbs, extremely bi or gay curious. Tired of play- ing by myself. ISO of someone who is not afraid to stretch a new bottom. ☎ 9492 GABRIELLE You’re the most beautiful per- son in the world and I love you more than anything. Sincerely, your dork boyfriend. ☎ 9483 CRUDE OIL Kyoto. Telegram from Kuala Lampur. Pirates off Coast of Africa. Tribal Leaders in the Americas. Islam and the Russian Federation. Tip off the Iceberg, for your 25th birthday, hugs. ☎ 9384 MASSAGE PSSST, HEY! Breakfast with the Blues every morning on 91.9 KRVM, pass it on! Couple, 40s, ISO fit, account- able, playful couple or women for connection, learning, mas- sage and friendship. If you have any questions come check it out BABY! ☎ 9374 OPEN MINDED LET’S HAVE SOME FUN Open minded WM seeks F or Bi couple for NSA sexual encoun- ters. Kinky, open-minded and discreet. Nude beach, photog- raphy, video. Age & race unim- portant. Let’s play! ☎ 9499 Honest. Have a relationship that lacks. Discretion needed. Strong, clean, handsome male. Love to be safe, secure sup- port system for a female and/or couple who like to wig- gle and show off. ☎ 9542 Fun prof. C seeks intelligence 25+ S/Bi/F to help fulfill your new Year’s resolution of new friends and experiences. Must like cats & herb. ☎ 9494 NEW YEARS RES ISO DOM COUPLE WM, 5’11’, 240lbs, long brown hair, brown eyes, seeking dom- inate, mature couple for bd, ds exploration. I have limited experience but wish to push the envelope as well as bi side. SHE’S SO FRESH! Just like lemonade! Eugene proudly welcomes Jade! 223- 6249. PLATINUM PLEASURES To find a male and female cou- ple for a ltr! I am an experi- enced married male, 5’7, 165 lbs, 57, healthy and cute. You don’t have to be Ken and Barbie. Just interested! ☎ 9480 Eugene’s Hottest New Service! Classy, Professioinal,discreet Hot Ladies! Our #1 Goal is making you happy and cumming back for more. Now selectively hiring Female Entertainers. 5 4 1- 6 0 6 - 9 4 6 2. RESPOND NOW A PLEASANT SURPRISE!! 07’ RESOLUTION IS? Buying prepaid calling cards at Eugene Weekly can save you money! Call 484-0159 or visit 1251 Lincoln St to buy your cards today. Sensual, busty, classy, pretty& attentive. Wanna play? Kristi, 337-7847. DESIREE’S ESCORTS Oregon’s hottest in adult enter- tainment. Beautiful ladies, upscale, classy, sensual, profes- sional, discreet and confiden- tial. Open 24 hours, your pleas- ure is our business. Call 541-431- 7065, www.desireesescorts.com NICE LOOKING COUPLE Nice looking couple looking for other couples 21-50 or male/ female individuals swing with. Must be STD free, discreet, and open minded. Let’s have some adult fun! ☎ 9479 MADISON Sinsual Erotic Xtacy. BBW, 42DD, 200 lbs. 10am-10pm, Mon-Sat. Incall Only. 988-0562. BE CHOOSY Not finding “the one”? Place your own ad! It's free, easy, and full of possibilities. WORDS OF PURE WISDOM by Dan Savage I recently met the straight cousin of a good friend. On the night of our first meeting, I ended up rimming, blowing, and getting fucked by him. And he blew me—badly. Since then, I’ve given him another blowjob. That night he slept with his arms around me and he repeatedly muttered to me— drunkenly—that he loves me! I have since gone out with the friend and the cousin several times to straight bars and have watched the cousin pick up girls, which is fine. I am not in the market for a fucked-up only-straight- when-sober boyfriend. But I do want to have sex with him. So here are the stupid questions: Is he straight? Is he gay? Is he bi? Why does he only want to fuck me when he’s drunk? Now he wants to go on vacation with me and I don’t know if I want to keep messing around with this “straight” hottie, even if he does have a beautiful, big, juicy cock. It’s not like I can see marrying him. What is a confused gay guy to do? Straight Cousin Unlikely Marry Keep jumping on that beautiful, big, juicy cock, of course. We advice professionals are never supposed to advise people—at least in print—to jump on a beau- tiful, big, juicy cock unless there’s a chance they’ll ride that cock all the way to the altar. Did Ann Landers—at whose desk I am delighted to be typing the phrase “beautiful, big, juicy cock”—advise a single reader to jump on a beautiful, big, juicy cock once in the 16 decades she was writing her col- umn? Did Abigail Van Buren? Has Billy Graham? No, no, and I’m guessing not. (I don’t read Graham’s syndicated advice column religiously, so I can’t rule out the possibility.) It’s not just that my advice-giving colleagues disapprove of premarital and/or no-possibility-of- marital sex. The whole culture has a problem with it. We all believe that sex should have some noble purpose—in theory, at least. The possibility of marriage is just the easiest and most obvious. But sex can have a noble purpose even when marriage is out of the question. Needless to say, an Ann Landers or a Billy Graham can’t see the noble purpose in a fag jumping on the beautiful, big, juicy cock of a drunken straight boy. I, however, can: One day BBJC is going to have to reconcile the person he is—and the people he fucks—when he’s drunk with the person he is when he’s sober. Every night he spends with you, SCUM, brings that day of reckoning eight or nine inches closer. So take the straight boy and his beautiful, big, juicy cock on vacation for his sake, SCUM, if not your own. And finally, an answer to the stupidest question: gay, straight, bi? My money’s on gay. Yes, there are a handful of straight men out there who will, when impaired or imprisoned, make do with a little man ass. And, yes, booze can bring out the inept cocksucker in many a bisexual dude. But a “straight” guy who makes drunken declarations of same-sex love is 110 percent faggot. I am a 48-year-old gay man and have been in a committed and monogamous relationship with a wonderful man for 20 years. I am not sure how often people together this long have sex, but for us it is about once every three or four weeks. This is plenty for me, but my husband’s libido seems to be getting much stronger than mine. About two years ago, he asked that we add “adventure” to our sex life. He has bought dildos, vibrators, and leather garb and wants me to use them. He wants me to call him fuckhole or slaveboy when we are intimate, and he wants to try nude vacations and three-ways. I should add that my husband is coming up on 40 and is quite the hottie. I, on the other hand, have not aged as gracefully. We also have small children and I don’t think it is appropriate to have these things in the house. Last week, he asked me to take him to a resort he found online for his 40th where I can fuck him in front of other men. Is this a normal gay midlife/about-to-turn-40 crisis? Slaveboy’s Husband Has Hesitations find sex partners! Meet real people for sex Sign up FREE Get laid TONIGHT www.orsexsearch.com 5SJBMDPEF0UIFS$JUJFT No, it’s not, SHHH, but is that relevant? Because like it or not this is the midlife crisis that your husband is having—not that I would normally characterize a strong libido as a crisis. To me it sounds like someone who settled down at 19 and wants to live a little while he’s still limber enough to really enjoy it. And I’m sorry, SHHH, but it’s your duty to indulge the little fuckhole. When two people marry, they’re not only making a solemn vow to be there in good times and bad, in sickness and in health, but also to be complete and total whores for each other. It would save countless marriages—and cut my mail in half—if this was made explicit in standard marriage vows. Perhaps the American Family Association could get on this. As for your issues, SHHH, bringing sex toys and fetish wear into a house with small children? You won’t be the first or last parents with a lock on their bedroom closet. Slaveboy and fuckhole? Perhaps not every time you have sex, but a little dirty talk isn’t too much to ask. Three-ways? Well, that’s something you have to be down with or it could do permanent damage to your relationship. I prescribe more discussion. Public sex in skeezy gay resorts? Most skeezy gay resorts allow nudity, SHHH, they don’t require it. He can run around naked and you can remain clothed. As for the public sex, if you agree to go to the resort, he has to agree to take no—and take it cheerfully—for an answer if you don’t feel comfortable doing him with witnesses. He’s a wonderful man. He has needs. Meet ’em. As a guy with a serious cuckold fetish, I agree with your assertion that a man can’t require his wife to have sex with other men. So before my wife and I were married, I told her about my romantic abnormality (on one of our first dates, in fact). She was into it and we embarked on a series of sexu- al adventures beyond my wildest dreams. She enjoyed cuckolding me and was great in every other way, so I married her. A year later, the cuckolding stopped. She said it was time for us to grow up and be adults, end of discussion. I offered a compromise: I’ll jerk off if she makes up stories about fucking other guys. No deal. You’ve stated that it’s okay for a spouse to go outside of the marriage to seek satisfaction when the partner refuses to help out. Obviously, this is impossible in my case. Am I doomed to jerking off alone with my fantasies for the rest of my life? Unlucky In Cuckoldry No, you’re not, UIC, because you’re going to get a divorce. You were up-front about your “romantic abnormality,” UIC, and your wife presented herself to you as someone not just willing and able, but delighted. And you married her in part because you were sexually compatible. If she felt that cuckolding wasn’t something that adults should do—was she a toddler when she was cuckolding you?—then she was obligated to say so before the wedding. A new Savage Love podcast is available for download every Tuesday at www.thestranger.com/savage. mail@savagelove.net SAVAGE LOVE IS PROUDLY SPONSORED BY: JANUARY 18, 2007 39
