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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 21, 2011)
business directory * OREGON'S LESBIAN/GAY/BI/TRANS/QUEER NEWSMAGAZINE OCTOBER 21,2011 41 J ß ] 503 . 236.1253 Promote Your Business Here » REAL ESTATE “It all starts with TIM PITTS Broker. Licensed in the State of Oregon Selecting the ideal real estate tim@livingroomrealtors.com 503 - 317-4312 professional can make buying or selling a home less stressful and more fulfilling. Where do you start? LIVING ROOM With a cup of cofTce perhaps REALTORS Donald Falk Principal Broker, g r i c r s abr ol Experience Licensed in Oregon A Washington » VOLUNTEERING JO E L H A M L E Y Principal Broker, ABR The Real in Realtor 18 YEA RS E X P E R IE N C E 1902 SE Morrison St. • Portland, OR 97214 COCKTAILS AT CLOSING Direct: 971.506.9499 OUR RANCH OR YOURS www.welcomehomepdx.com See my display ad in this issue. 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Call 503-823-0239 or email Girlstrength.pb@portlandoregon.gov w ayne a v is WANT TO ADVERTISE H ER E? P rin c ip a l B ro k e r ( if»\ KcalKslalc Celia J. Lyon C all Principal Broker THE POWER OF ONE •// ( 503 ) 319-4057 hddavisC« realtytrust.com CeliaLyon.com • CeliaLyonf« aol.com Meadows Group Inc. • 1902 SE Morrison or Call Toll Free 1.888.420.MOVE (6683) S E E M Y D ISP LA Y AD IN TH IS IS S U E ( 503 ) 294-1101 www.realtytrust.com/hdwaynedavis 503.236.1253 Fax Ext. to. 503.236.1257 www.justout.com L et’s talk alm ut your need » and cre a te a strategy fo r your future. everything you Nervous About Our Nellie Son D f . a r M s . B e h a v i o r : My partner and I are two proud masculine gay men. We are socially and economically successful in the straight world. W e’ve been together for a decade, and are raising a son together, who is now 8 years old. We haven’t wanted Jeff to grow up in a gay ghetto, so we’ve exposed him to a broad range o f people and ac tivities, including sports and stock-car racing. In the last year or so, Jeff has become quite nellie. f le ffounces, he lisps, he wears scarves on his head, and he watches M omm ie Dearest over and over. We found a copy o f Oprah magazine under his pillow. He asked for a formal tea set for his birthday. Plus, we’ve heard him make his favorite Barbie doll sing the theme song 1 take hers away. I f I really loved her, would I want To make / love more to her? — Confused D ear C o n fu s e d : 31 ms. behavior . BY M ER YL COHN We haven’t wanted Jeff to grow up in a gay ghetto, so we’ve exposed him to a broad range of people and activities, including sports and stock-car racing. In the last year or so, Jeff has become quite nellie. He flounces, he lisps, he wears scarves on his head, and he watches Mommie Dearest over and over... to Cats. Jeff is a sweet, wonderful child, hut we First you say, “I love this woman!” Then you wonder if deeper love would make you feel more passionate, even though your tepid response is not specific to this relationship. Does the ob stacle to your passion feel physical? Emotional? You say that “negative factors” influence your lives together. This could mean that your mother lives with you, you’re broke, the cat pees on the bed, or you have a chronic yeast infection. You seem to have trouble identifying your feelings, or at least being honest about them. Therapy may help, but you should also rule don’t understand why he’s so queeny; neither absolutely do nothing positive for your little one o f us is effeminate. nellies self-esteem. D e a r M s . B e h a v io r : out a physical problem. I f you do nothing, you For the past three years, I’ve been in my may lose your relationship, in which case i\fs. This feminine behavior is not offensive to You can try to heat the bov into butchness, first lesbian relationship. I love this woman! Behavior would bet that lukewarm sex follows us, hut we’ve tried so hard to provide a loving send him to a military school where they’ll do it But she wants to make love more than I do you like a had dream to the next one. Or, to he neutral environment for our son, and we worry for you, or confine him to his room every time he and feels that I do not want her like she less dramatic about it, you may find that you that outsiders will think that we’re teaching Jeff acts faggy. Or, you can do what the best straight wants me. Now I worry that I am under- just have a low libido. to be gay. W hat should we do? parents ultimately do: Accept the fact that you sexed or inhibited. Everything else between have a lovely poofter for a son, and he grateful us is good. — S a ru iR for his creativity, sensitivity and sense o f style. D ear S and R: Don’t worry what “outsiders” think; the But if you are indeed capable o f erotic ecstasy, then mediocre sex is a big drag. Ms. Behavior In a previous relationship with a man, I also would suggest that you try everything— psycho didn’t feel passionate, but I stayed with him therapy, an exorcism, prayer, pelvic exercises. This because I loved him. is not just to please your girlfriend, hut so that you I f your son showed more masculine signs ones prone to judging you will do so regard o f being gay (like asking for chaps for C hrist less of what you do or how Jeff acts. And the I do want her, but not with the f requency or mas, and hiding copies o f Honcho under his loving ones will remain that way whether or passion she needs and wants. W hen we have pillow), you would feel more comfortable, not your son is a sissy. sex (about once a week), it is intense and excit can sec how magnificent unbridled passion will feel to you. Even if it’s just for a moment or twtv since his queerness would he more closeted. Buy Jeff a tea set for his birthday. And throw ing. Some negative factors influence our lives M ery/ Cohn is the author o f D o W h at I Say: But trying to force him, however subtly, to in a few pretty scarves, just to show him how together, which affect me. But should those M s. Behaviors G uide to Gay and Lesbian he the kind o f queer you find acceptable will much you love him. other problems reduce my passion? It doesn’t Etiquette. E m a il mshehavior^Paol.com.
