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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 7, 2005)
30 FILM ......... ▼......... Queer ears The Phantom off the Opera hile college theses and lxx>ks have under taken the task to deconstruct exactly why gay men are so drawn to Broadway musicals, one of those shows that defies easy categorization as “queer friendly” is Andrew Lloyd Webber’s The Phantom of the Opera. Sure, it has a tragic and misunderstcxxl lead male who hides his true self, hut who wants to and a ccxlpiece, Schumacher’s overly gaudy compare their closet to the dank dungeons of stamp is all over the screen. rhe Phantom—or their hair-don’ts with a mis But is it fair to blame the director for set shapen face? designs that kxik as if King Midas got touchy- Yes, it has a comely heroine in Christine, feely during an orgy? After all, by now, even who’s tom between suitor Raoul’s true love and Schumacher must realize no one comes to his money and the Phantom’s charisma and career films expecting subtlety, so he gives none here. advancing lessons, hut Christine is neither the Which is not to say that his Phantom is a fail take-charge ballsy bitch nor the oppressed ure. Au contraire. Schumacher’s Phantom is so woman we secretly r<x)t for, both of which are close to Webber’s, stage version that 1 had to popular themes for showtune queens. research to figure out what few scenes were miss Yes, Phantom has shamelessly-stolen-from- ing from the original (to make rixim for a dread Puccini music that swells and recedes, yet it fully shcx-'homed-in origin for Li’l Phantom). also alternately threatens to induce sleep or Gerard Butler does an acceptable turn in confusion, depending on the length of the love the lead role, thankfully not aping Michael ballads or the five-person counter-songs. Crawford’s original take on the character. So it must be the chandelier. Gorgeous and Emily Rossum is a pretty and winsome Chris full of crystalline lights, the crashing chandelier tine, and both Minnie Driver (as a bitchy diva) is as orgasmic a sight-for many gay men as a car and Miranda Richardson (as an uptight ballet jumping through a fireball is for hetero guys. mistress) shine. Only Patrick Wilson dis Gay director Joel Schumacher knows chan appoints, showing both zero charisma and a deliers, as well as gilded statuary, dark-cloaked lack of lip-sync ability that would make Ashlee men in shadows and overwrought music. After Simpson blush. all, this is the man who went from The Lost —Andy Mangels Boys to Batman & Robin, and although the Phantom has not been reimagined with nipples W < Tone-deaf musical directors Joel Schumacher and Kevin Spacey can’t compete with visionary artist who’s actually losing his hearing Beyond the Sea obby Darin died when he was 37. Kevin Spacey is 46. His Darin biopic, Beyond the Sea, is dead in the water. Although Spacey acquits himself nicely doing all of his own singing and dancing, one can never escape the fact that he’s just tix> old to play a baby-faced lounge singer. Darin enjoyed a huge pop and film follow ing in rhe 1960s—he was the highest-paid singer in Vegas—but his life was a race against time. A bout of rheumatic fever left his heart damaged at the age of 8; his d<x:tor predicted he wouldn’t live past 15. This Sword of Damocles sparked his frantic work ethic and tireless ambition. Darin’s story—his drive and his meteoric rise to fame; his celebrity marriage to Sandra Dee, the No. 1 box office star at rhe rime (imagine marrying Julia Roberts); his political awakening; and his surprise discovery that his sister was The Phantom menace: A young singer (Golden actually his mother—invites dramatization. Yet Globe nominee Emily Rossum) is charmed by a | Spacey, who is credited with the screenplay, has mysterious specter who haunts the Paris Opera written a downright dull movie filled with silly house (Gerard Butler) in Joel Schumacher’s cliches. (“Memories are like moonbeams; we do gaudy musical what we want with them.” Huh?) B I VIDEO MAGAZINES While the supporting cast (including Boh Hoskins, Brenda Blethyn and, especially, Caro line Aaron as his sister) is terrific, when an actor writes, directs, produces and stars, you naturally f<x:us on him, which brings us hack to the age problem. Older men playing opposite much younger women is an established movie tradition. (Remember Clint Eastwixxl and Rene Russo in In the Line of Fire or Richard Gere and Winona Ryder in Autumn in New York? lek!). But seeing Spacey w<x> Kate Bosworth (Win a Date with Tad Hamilton!) as Sandra Dee just feels wrong. In the film, Darin’s manager calls him “brash, c<x:ky and arrogant.” But the middle- aged Spacey, with his doughy face, deep lines and double chin, doesn’t exude a young man’s energy and enthusiasm, no matter how hard he tries. I can’t help wondering what Beyond the Sea would have been like with Matt Damon or Ewan McGregor (who was so Darin-like in rhe musical number that played during the closing credits of Down with Dive) instead. —Floyd Sldaver TOYS NOVELTIES LOTIONS AND MORE... VIDEOS /\& LOW PORTLAND t seems to me poetry is better than prose, and ptxjtry with music is heightened poetry. And that’s what opera is—it’s heightened experience.” That’s how gay artist David Hockney sum marizes his passion for the fat lady in The Col ors of Music, screening Jan. 9 as part of the Northwest Film Center’s 22nd annual Reel Music Festival. (See Page 24 for details.) As an opera virgin, I wasn’t sure what to expect from this documentary, which takes us behind the scenes to watch the celebrated painter design sets for several productions per formed around the world. It turns out Hockney brings a fresh outsider’s perspective to the stage, adding new visual flavor to old musical compositions. Mixing media is nothing new for H<x:kney, whose works include 1961 ’s We Two Boys Clinging Together, a painting that incorporated graffiti-like text from a Walt Whitman poem, Kevin Spacey rocks the cradle with Kate Bosworth in the Bobby Darin biopic Beyond the Sea TABOO ADULT VIDEO DVD David Hockney: The Colors of Music $4.95 MULTI-CHANNEL ARCADE WITH VOYEUR GLASS 237 S.E. MLK BLVD 503-239-1678 VANCOUVER 2330 S.E. 82ND AVE 503-777-6033 4811 NE 94TH AVE 360-254-1126 Gay artist David Hockney creates The Colors of Music and 1967’s Illustrations for Fourteen Poems by CPC Cavafy, a series of etchings to accompany homosexual verse by the Greek writer. Nonetheless, it’s impressive to see Hockney remain relevant at the age of 67. He makes a sly reference to current events in his analysis of the Eric Satie ballet Parade: “The messages are against war. We begin, as it were, with the ugli ness of war and end with the innocent vision of a child that thinks kindness is our only hope. I like that.” Sadly, Hixzkney is going deaf from a genetic condition, so he doesn’t have much longer to enjoy the music that accompanies his colorful décor. But he maintains a bright outlook on life that is a joy to behold: “We are all touched by tragedy...yet we’re not, unfortunately, all touched by the comic. Life must have two sides.” —Jim Radosta jH
