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About La Grande evening observer. (La Grande, Or.) 1904-1959 | View Entire Issue (April 30, 1910)
LA GRANDE EVENING OBSERVER MONDAY. MAY 2. 1910.' PAGE SIX. The n i 1 crap Book Collecting a Nickel. The conductor looked worried and was in an ugly mood. lie bad been counting tils cash, and it was evidently short, as hU scowl declined as he dropped it back in his poc k et and glanced at the indi cator. Just then two worklngmen, one an Italian and the other an Irishman, boarded the car and found seats. The conductor call ed for the fare, and each man handed j 11,10 d,me ne stT' J dropped . them In and turned away without giving any change. " ' "I want da nick," complained tho Neapolitan. "You've got your nick. No more ticks for you. Beer and the conduct or lunvcul tn thA rear platform. The Italian sat meekly In silence, but uio iriautuau employed different tactics. He went to the doorway. "Olm me folve clnts change," said, be to the conduct or. "You've got all the change you're going to get," was the retort "See here," ex claimed the Irish man, "you may play that chune on hand organ, but you can't play It on a harp. Gimme folve clnts." And he got It ' y.r-fxwj (jnrrj there i"' " Tla OU Paduy riyuuT Ar ye t boss?" "I nm." said Mr. Ilobart "Well, thin." yelled Flynn, "sthlck yor head out ' av th second sthory windy wbolle 01 sthep out on th sold walk. 01 want to talk r yer-Lippta-cott's. THt COKDCOTOB LOOKED WOBBIED. "gimme rorvx currs." . Let Us 8mile. The thing- that goes the farthest toward making life worth while, , That costs the leaat and does the most, la Juat a pleasant smile. The smile that bubbles from a heart that lovea its fellow men Will drive a war the cloud of gloom and co the sun again. : It's full of worth and goodness, too, with manly klndneaa blent It's worth a million dollars and doesn't cost a cent f , , National Magaslne. ' The Fool Man. !;;A man who prided himself on bis keen sense of. humor., bad been In vited to an evening party. He wanted to go,1 but his wife declared' that the bad no gown suitable for the occasion and asked him to tend regrets to their boat ess., Tho man went down to his WSee and penned this facetious not of declination: K"v ; : . ;.. "We regret that your kind invitation bust be declined for all tho conven jtional reasons, bur tho real reason Is that half the family has nothing, to wear, My 'wife's latest dross Is over three weeks old, and her bat Is twelve bours out of date. Yon will appreci ate the hopelessness of the occasion and excuse us."1 v; t ; .., lie thought this pretty good, and be determined to write a note to bis wife also explaining that be would not; be at borne for an early dinner, as she bad asked him. He said In this, note: "I have turned! down your Invitation because I am going out to another evening party where the guests are not expected to wear anything of Im portance. Borry I won't be there to kiss you good night' t . ' And then the fool man carelessly gent bis wife's note to the hostess and the hostess' note to his wife. At FLEASANT REMARK. It Was the Only Ono the Crank Made During the Game. At a whist club in Brooklyn was an old fellow who enjoyed the reputation of being a great crank, and his an imadverelons against his partners were so severe and . his manners generally so bad that it was rare, indeed, that he could get any one to play with him.. One night, however, a man happen ed in from the west and the avoided one promptly assailed him with a re quest to "sit ln.t The western man was about to comply when be was quietly taken aside by one of the mem bers of the club, who told him the reputation of the crank. "I don't care," he said. "I can stand It I guess." At the end of the evening be was approached once more by the curious member. ' "Well," said the member, "how did you manager "First rate." "DWn't be insult your "Why. no." . ' , ' "Didn't he browbeat your "Not at aU." "Didn't he say anythingr "Nothing special. He only spoke once during the whole course of the game." ' "Whit did he say then?" "Why, I didn't get the cards out right In the last round, and be looked over at me very pleasantly and said, "Why, you can't even deal, can your -Life. ' The Tale That taft Told. While spending the winter In Geor gia before bis inauguration as 'presi dent Mr. Taft went to the city , of Athens to deliver an address to the students of the University of Georgia. He met a member of the faculty a stanch Democrat who said: "Judge, I voted the Democratic tick et, but wanted to see you win." Judge Taft replied: "You remind me of the story of Br'er Jasper and Br'er Johnson, who were both deacons In the Shlloh Baptist church, although avowed enemies.. "Br'er Jasper died, and the othedea. cons, told Br'er Johnson be must say something good about the deceased on Sunday night At first he declined, but finally consented. ; u- ; 'Sunday night, when time for the eulogy arrived, he arose slowly and said, Urederen and state ren, I prom ised ter say sump's good, 'bout Dea-eon- Jasper tonight, an' I will say we all hopes he's gone, whar we knows be ain't" - - ' " ' .; i A Word ef kindness. There are Uvea of wearisome mo notony which a word of kindness can relieve. There is suffering which words of sympathy' can make more endurable, ' and often, even " In the midst of wealth and luxury, there are those who listen and long In Tain for some expression of disinterested kind ness. Speak' to those while they can bear and be helped by you.' The Doctor's Order. ' An old farmer was walking out one day looking very glum and miserable. He waa a man who ordinarily dearly loved a joke. But Jokes seemed ' a long : way , off Just then, and the old I man was thinking deeply , when be was accosted by a tramp, who' made the usual request for a night's lodg ing and something to eat as be ex plained be had bad nothing for two I -: :. Struck a Sksptie.; - A food faddist was lecturing to a large audience1 on the marvelous re sults to be obtalued from chewing soup or eating nut butter or some thing of that kind. lie was lean and small and not a very Imposing person ' physically; but, swelling out his chest, be slapped It thrice . with the palm ,,: and cried: "Friends, two years ago I was a walking skeleton, a haggard, miserable t wreck. Now, what do you suppose i brought about this great change In mer . . ' ,.. ; He paused to let his words sink u, ' tand a voice asked: i "What changer l' ' ; Wanted Plenty ef Room. U A solemn looking .Irishman entered ,n business bouse and, walking up to one of the men employed on the lower floor, asked: . . ,; 1 . "la there anny cbanst far a mon f get a Job ar wur-rk berer v.. "I don't know," . saia the man. 'You'll have to see Mr, nobart" "An phwere Is her . ' V "Up on the second floor," was the .answer ' -ShaH Ol walk up an talk to hlmr "No need of that Just whistle In that tube, and he'll speak to you," Dolntlng to a speaking tube. The Irishman walked over to the tube and blew a mighty blast In It Hearing the whistle, Mir. nobart r to the tube and Inquired: ' "' WlLKXD ON BIM. whole days. The effect upon the farmer when he said this waa magic al, t "Why, man," he said, "I've been looking for you all day." Ana then without more ado he knocked him down and walked on him rrom one end to the other. The tramp sui up, loosing very Btaggered, and aaea mm why be had done that "ww said he, "my doctor has or- norta me to walk on an mntv tnm. and bow that I have fulfilled bis nctlon I can go and have a good d: Newest Dishes Tastiest Flavors Best Seiyed Ice Cream Selder's Gonfectionery Store mm i1 it ... ' . Unless Tour. Underwear Fits. ; Lewis. Underwear is nade to Fl, and Fit to wear. Because- Every garment Is made tlr BEST TABS of Its kind procurable. 1 - V ' Shorter stitches are taken Jlha a on any ether make of underwear. ' ( , r year ly all of the thread us for stitching Is TURU THREAD SIlK. AH BUTTON HOLES are with THREAD SILK. Only FIRST GRADE BUTTONS ARE USED. All BUTTONS are sewed on with SILK THREAD. . The CUFFS AND ANKLFS are so knitted and shaped that they wiU hold the sleeves and legs of the garments In shape. ".:'t -iL f. A STRAP Is put on the SHOULDERS of each shirt and union suit which Is' elastic and yet does not 1ft the garment sag and drop down on the arm. . A NECK OF SPECIALLY KNITTED DESIGN s put on each skirt snd union -suit V Onr Full Fashioned Good are FULL FASHIONED THROUGTIOUl nre hand knitted and conform to the lines of the body..'; " .,' -.'S..; - . '.,";.. V,- : V ' ' Gar cut and sewed goods n re made on SPRING NEEDLE Mi'chines. .The latter cost twice as mnch as latch needle machines; tli fabric h FIRMER; garments made from these HOLD THEIR SHAPE BET TER and wear longer. For twenty-fire years LEWIS underwear has been recognized as the HIGHEST QUALITY of any made. And cost no more than inferior makes. "If its the Style we have I" teMTni L i.,. "It is asrled by the promoters of the t that there ista ViMt .6untv6f - out almost daily to creameries in distant localities.', - in the Air. 27th issue f:6f, Ae:Moriiiii&S stated that not a can of cream liad been shipped ;::;by;a:&r'rroL;& A CORRECTION v We overlooked the fact that two cans were shipped out last summer. Thiactstdan be veir ified by , the express office records. : Sif 7 nroiids.-";Thr Insurgents Toteo-wnn ti : --.t- .