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About Tillamook headlight. (Tillamook, Or.) 1888-1934 | View Entire Issue (Dec. 29, 1921)
QUEAL, squeal, said Pinky Pig. SX. • aqoeal. Broth* “It most certainly la," sald Sammy Sausage. “I’ve never heard of anything sc nice." said Master Pinky Pig And his mother added, ^It’s fine squeal, squeal, it’s fine 1 MI m Ham. An^. grunted five times, one grunt after the other to show that she agreed. “What are you all talking about?' asked Bod Top, the rooster ^"You dont know?" asked all the “Oh yea, I know," said Red Ton. crowing proudly. “Then why did you aakF inquired Brother Bacon. "Ton haven't much sense,” said Bad Top. “Of course I don’t know or I wouldnt have asked.” “Well did I ever," grunted Miss Haiu Ton said one moment ago that you did know and now you say you dont know. Which do you mean? Do you know what we were talking about or dont your “Yes,” said Sammy Sausage, “that la what we would like to know." “Well," said Red Top, "I don’t know, and If I had I wouldn’t have asked you. When I said I knew I thought you all had sense enough to know that I was joking. It seems that none of you can take a Joke." "Take a joke," repeated Brother Bacon. “You say that none of us can take a joke. Well, why should we? A joke isn’t anything to eat. What would we be doing with a joke I'd like to know.” "Yes,” aald Porky Pig, “we’d all like to 1 know what we would do with a joke.' And all the pigs squealed. "We’d like to know what we could do if we took a joke. It’s nothing to eat so why should we take it?” Red Top the rooster clucked and crowed and grinned. “This is the best joke.” "What do we care about it being the best joke?” asked Brother Bacon. "We’ve already told you we didn’t care about a joke because It was noth ing to eat. We don’t care whether it is a best one or not. Now if you were talking about a best dish of food —that would be different” "Yes, that would be quite different." squealed the other pigs. "I was wrong)” said Red Top grin ning. “Of course you have no wish to take a joke because it is nothing to eat. I meant, of course, that it was a joke when I pretended I knew what you were talking about just after I had asked you that question. I wouldn’t have asked you if I had known, as I have said before. And I wouldn’t have bothered to have had a litle joke with you if I had thought that you didn’t care about joking. In fact you care about nothing but eat ing.” All the pigs grinned and twisted their little tails. "We show we’re regular pigs," said Brother Bacon. "We’ll forget about jokes and jek- _ _ ——*vp. iwi dm you were talking about. I would —__________ like to hear. I don’t know really. That’s ths truth. And that’s not a joke" “We were talk ing about It be ing such a good thing.” explained Miao Ham. “What is suck a good thing?" asked Red Top. "This Idea of New Years reso lutions.” said Miss Ham. “You see we heard that every year around this time folks and creatures began making good resolutions. And we've made ours. We think they’re fine and we hope to live up to them.” “That’s good.” said Red Top. “But what are your resolutions?" be asked after a moment. “To got all we can to eat, each of us,“ said Miss Ham. “and never to think or worry about anyone but our- selves.” “Well, I never." said Red Top. “You don’t know much about the real mean ing of good resolutions, but what should I expect? After all your are only pigs." “Pigs with good resolutions,” posted Miss Ham. Old Oilcloth. •■■■• Bank Bldg. Ground Floor The wassail bowl or loving cup, filled with spiced ale, was In use in New Year celebrations In Old World countries, and children would go about the streets caroling. • • • In England December 25 was the New Year’s day until the time of WM- 11am the Conqueror, His coronation occurred January 1, hence the year was ordered to begin on that day. England, however, gradually fell Into unison with the rest of Christendom, and began the year the 25th of March. The Gregorian calendar restored Jan uary 1 as the gateway of the year but it was not until 1752 that England adopted this date. « • • The custom of exchanging New Year presents still bolds in France and the Latin countries. Crabtree has new community hall. 1 nsai^ Pacific Abstract Company L. ▼. EBERHARDT. Prop- Happy ®ew year to evrybuddy an it wont be Christmuss agen for a hull yeer an its my berthday <o- morrer but I dont gess I will get nothin cause my fother he sod bi.» pocketbook is got a blow out from Christmuss an its a flat tire now. jlm dash Mister Pioveaon what lives up to Wheeler give Judge Stanley I a hundred dollars for Christmuss I gesB an Judge Stanley he give It 10 the county to pay bills with, He wus rested for havin sum raisin mashes an so when him an Julge Stanley talked about it Mlstor Pio- veson he sed he wood make it all rite so Judge Stanley sed well you jess hand over | a hundred dollers an that will fill up the bill. Raisin mashes is to make you happy for Christmuss I gess. jlm dash Sheriff Aschlm an Mister Luc at an Mlater Holden wus up to Bay City to a party to Mister Larson’s house wlch la cashier up to the bank thare. Nobudy wus hurt. Mister Fred Messersmith’s broth er is here to stay all the time now from Springfield wich is the capithe of Illnols. He alnt a pollertishun he is jess a gentleman. The cheef sed you cant be both. He sed neer evrybuddy in Springfield Is a poll- ertishun the cheef did. He’s got his fatniy with him .also. jlm dash Mister Hacjet wlch is from Long Prairie sed the storm put his lttes on the bum but he got them fixed up for Christmuss Jess the same so he cood see what wus in his stock in I gess In the mornln. Jim dash Mlater Page had am cumpaey up to his house wlch wus Jess his daughter from Orenco I gees cause she looks like him. jlm dash I seen Mlsa Patterson jess now na she sed she never dun so much blsnees in her hull life like she did ChrMmusa. She sed peepte got hats what alnt never got hats from her before an corsets also. FORGET PAST, START ANEW WITH NO APOLOGY FOB YESTERDAY youth, because fno person is exempt from moral obligations. There is no age limit in life’s battle. When we are through with the world the world is through with us. Too many persons consider it fashionable to "retire” at a certain age, and that age is getting constantly low er. If one has not found life’s pltg-e before forty, the more the reason for his doubling his efforts after forty. A man should not consider withdrawing from life's toil at fif ty, and one should not think him self old at sixty. Gladstone was do ing the best wtork of his life at eighty-five, and at eighty-seven toured England on a speech-mak ing trip on behalf of Armenia. Little streams often dry up the desert, but great rivers run strength to the bea, and turn wheels of commerce before they finally plunge into the ocean. Small lives are easily discouraged, but every great life is rooted in the past, blossoms today and bears fruit tomorrow. The gieat life is ahead, because we have the blessed results of yes- today’s experience. The future is full of promise. America’s greatest history is yet to come. 1921 was far better than 1920; 1922 will be better than 1921, if we will make it so. We shall find this a very good old world, if we ate willing to do our part. "Success consists not in never falling, but in rising every time fall." —Nathan Howard Grit. Box Up All Mistakes ejpd Troubles That Never Happened and Bury Them Deep. N SCOTLAND New Year s day has even more impor tance than Christmas. High land laddies form proces sions and go from house to house singing and receiv ing food and gifts. From Scotland also comes the curious superstition that it is unlucky to take anything out of the house on New Year’s day before one has brought something In; hence members of the family may be seen carrying a piece of coal or any small object Into the house, to prevent misfortune during the new year. • • • A quaint New Year custom In Her- fordahlre, England, is to weave black thorn into a crown, singe it slightly over a fire and stand around It repeat ing the words, "Old Cider." The crown is then hung up for luck during the year. • * * im Both Phones: Ball ll-J P. 0. Box 1»7 I visited a penitentiary one time. The turnkey went before, unlocked all the doors and carefully locked them after we had gone through. We went from cell-house to cell house and from corridor to corridor. We could not go back, but we could go forward.. Forget about last year. December 31 locks its doors forever. You can’t unlock '.those doors. What has been done cannot be undone. Perhaps you be gan your life’s journey quite a- while ago, 1900 is gone! 1910 is gone! 1920 is gdlpe! Those years all sped by and they are locked for ever. They are gone with lost op- portnittes, wasted privileges, brok en pledges. You cannot call them back. Regrettable it is we cannot go back, and, with the added experi ence of years live a portion of our lives over again. Every high- minded person would do different ly if he was given the last ten or twenty years to live over. But why think over the past? Why nurse the unfortunate in your bosom? You catjnot go back if you would; if you are sensible you would not if yo could. To brood over life’s un forgotten past only doubles the present load, makes one more mor ose and crabbed, and deepens the furrows in One’s brow. Wipe off the slate. Box up all omissions, all “shallow miseries,” all mistakes, all. the troubles trat Sever happen- ed—and bury them. Head erect, Then about face! chest out, shoulders back, and— Look every per- forward march! son squarely in the eye, make no apology for ysterday, for tomorrow is before you. The new year I b yours. The world lies at your very feet. This Is not a message simply for PERFECT POLITENESS. On arrival of a train in Nairobi Station the other day three lions entered a carriage. It speakB well of the court esy of the passengers that to a man they gave up their seats.—Punch < London). A LINE TO GET ’EM: Who’ll be the first dealer to advertise; "Get an automobile or an automobile wl't get you?”—Greenville (S. C.) Pied mont. Complete Set of Abstracts of thss Records of Tillamook County TILLAMOOK OREGON TOPS! Standard Top Recovering Outfits for Fords everything ready to put un same put on $i 1.50 ANNO UNCEMENT ic i cw i crmo f omao i o ie H» Ford Rear Curtains put on $3.50 Celluloid in side curtains J4c square inch. All other tops in proportion. See me before buying AX/Ehereby notify the toade that we will Order by mail for Ford Tops. discontinue carrying dairy feed in stock after Weight 11 pounds ready to ship. January 1st, 1922, and will handle same orders for cash only LITSCHER TOP SHOP Phone Bell 38 J Tillamook, Oregon ■X CONOVER & CONOVER TILLAMOOK, OREGON ECONOMY CLEANERS a: Cleaning, Dyeing. Pressing, Repairing Hats, Cleaned and Blocked Moder» Nqafpment htWaettea GaaraateM 2nd Ave. E. Bet. 3rd and 4th Sts. • Tillamook, Oregon
