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About Herald and news. (Klamath Falls, Or.) 1942-current | View Entire Issue (July 15, 1963)
"DENNIS THE MENACE" "Hi.Mcm! Aw telephone calls Atom mv Half Million , Elevated To CHICAGO (UPI) - More than a half million Americans will be elevated to new heights this year via the nation's commercial airliners. A survey compiled by United Air Lines showed that over half these novice air travelers will be traveling over routes they once covered by car, train or bus. A majority will journey more than 1,000 miles from home. Shorter travel time is the prime object of three-fourths of the new Clergyman To Aid OS Chronic Liar By ANN LANDERS Dear Ann Landers: My heart aches (or the young boy who wrote and said he was a chronic uar ana aian t know how to stop. The poor i lad said he nev er told lies that S would hurt, flnv- t body. He just SH dreamed up sto- ries to mane himself seem more important or to make his humdrum life seem more glam orus. I was like that when I was a youngster and I took my prob lem to a wonderful clergyman. He "cured" me. Perhaps the same technique will work for him. Here it is: When you hear yourself weav ing one of those fabulous yarns bring the story to an abrupt end with a ridiculous phrase such as this: "And then I shot myself and died." Smile and add, "Beat that one if you can." This is an easy way of saying, "It was all in fun and I didn't mean it." - EX-PREVARICATOR Dear Ex: Thank you for the suggestion. It sounds workable and I hppe the boy tries it. Dear Ann Landers: Erma is a dear friend of whom I am ex tremely fond. The standing joke about her in our crowd is that she was an 11-month baby and lias been late ever since. Erma lives near me. She doesn't drive but I do, so that means I pick her up several times a week. She's one of these disorganized people who. no mat ter how far ahead she plans, she can't seem to get herself togeth er on time. I have sat out in front of her house for as long as 25 minutes chewing my finger rtails. Each time I tell myself I am never going to pick her up again. But she is such a lovely person I can't bring myself to do it. Last week we arrived at a fu neral 20 minutes late. This week we missed the door prize draw ings at the Ladies Aid. I don't remember the last time I heard a meeting called to order. I dis cussed the problem with my hus band last night. He said, "This is one for Ann Landers." I agree with him. Can you help? NO NAILS NANCY Dear No Nails: Erma is not going to change unless she has :jjiiuwiti r m KAY BROS. CIRCUS JULY 18th Two Performances 1 P.M. and 8 P.M. ALL-STAR ACTS Klamath Auditorium General Admission $1.00 Children (Under 12) 50c Doors Open 1 Hour Early Before Performances PRESENTED BY LINKVILLE KIWANIS CLUB " 5 Americans New Heights flyers, according to A. J. Beve-I rett, market research manager! for United. "To illustrate, a family living in Ohio or New York can easily spend 12 or 14 vacation days at a West Coast vacation spot if they fly there and back," he said. Half the first-time flyers will be vacation-bound, the survey indi cated. Women appear to be the most adventuresome in the sur vey results, as 60 per cent of those experimenting with air trav el will lie female. to. And she doesn't have to so long as you continue l(i sit out In front and wait for her. The day you tell her that you won't slop if she isn't out in front then do it that will be the day when Erma pulls up her socks and gets herself ready on time. Unill then wear mil- tens. Dear Ann Landers: I once read in your column that you thought it was perfectly all right for peo ple to take home from restau rants the food they were unable to eat at the table. What do you tiiinK ot the following? We attended a beautiful wed ding last week. The woman next to us had a large beaded hand bag almost the size of a shop ping bag. After the dinner was served she wrapped up the rolls and put them in her handbag. She then got herself four pieces of wedding cake, wrapped them in paper napkins and put them in the bag, "for the children." Later in the evening when the dancing started, she dumped all the nuts into a plastic envelope which she had brought from home. Then she grabbed all the candy. The woman didn't leave one edible thing on that table. When she noticed me looking at her she said, "I hate to waste anything." What is your opinion of this? GOGGLE-EYED Dear Goggle: The woman had no right to clean up the table. It would have been permissible for her to ask the hostess If she might take an extra piece of wedding cake or two for her chil dren, but it was downright boor ish to swarm all fiver the rolls, nuts and candy. This amazing new guards against spills . . . wards off common soils . . . prolongs life of fabrics. Call on us today. CASCADE Laundry ond CLEANERS Opp. Post Office Ph. 4-5111 or 2-2531 BROADWAY CLEANERS 4615 So. 6th Ph. 4-6403 There Are Still BOOXVILLE, Mo. (UPI) I There are still giants in this land. Often you have to get out of the big cities to see them clearly. 1 refer, in this instance, to the finest Harrigan and Hart vaude vine-type act now rampant on television. It is composed of Jerome Han- na Dean, commonly known as Diz zy, and Harold Henry Reese, commonly known as Pee Wee, and they broadcast "The Game of the Week" on Saturdays and Sundays on about 50 per cent of the LBS network. The unlucky half of the network that doesn't get them includes all the major Large Dogs Now Loved CHICAGO (UPI I - There are signs that large dogs, after being rejected the past few years in fa vor ot apartment-sized canines. are staging a comeback. The German Shepherd, on the basis of a 13 per cent gain, dis placed the poodle during the past year as the most exhibited dog in championship ocmpetition, ac cording to a poll (by the Quaker Oats Co.). The increasing popularity of big city "K-9 Corps" and other fac tors connected with protection of life and property combined to hoist the shepherd into the top position. In the champion competition category, poodles dropped to sec ond place despite an increase of four per cent, while dachshunds showed a six per cent loss to re tain third place and cocker span iels registered a five per cent loss to remain in fourth spot. Poodles, however, continue to be the most popular dog in number of stud book registrations. Another big dog, the boxer, so lidified his fifth place exhibition ranking with an increase of four per cent. Collies showed a small gain to hold the sixth position. The powerful Doberman clung to seventh place, holding on with a minor gain, while Great Danes registered a six per cent gain to strengthen their grip on eighth Chihuahuas stayed in ninth, with Shetlands moving up one place to tenth. CARD SUITS Four suits of the familiar pack of cards represent the four orders of society in -the Middle Ages. Spades, an adaptation of the scep ter, represented the nobility hearts, modification of a chalice, depicted the clergy; diamonds, the merchant class; and clubs, an adaptation of an acorn or a stave, represented the peasantry. EE SHETLAND PONY EVERY TUESDAY GET YOUR FREE TICKETS AT Jay Hawk PETROLEUM 2135 So. 6th or So. 6th and Crest PROTECT your DRAPES and SLIPCOVERS with miracle SotWiDjuf. development from Sanitone NEW METHOD Cleaners 1453 Esplanade Ph. 4-4471 Jft, J . milk p5 . "C'V "''X league cities, which means 20 of, our biggest towns are bereft. They do a running comment on what is going on at the baseball game of the moment, throwing in accounts of their own titanic ca reers in the baseball of yore, and divers other matters, while you look at the game. (Anytime Deanj says the word "yore," incidental-! ly, he's pronouncing the word your. I I took it all down for about four innings one day, and 1 still don't believe it. However, I offer the following fragments: Dizzy: "Yeah, that pitch I used to throw had a vapor trail." WJ-i V I f- p,w- ftv-X!'T,Kv ii. f . MMio I'! 'fWl Coldbrook Vegetable mi nine mm nmnnirnni-- Dial Soap , fe"- 3 - :,i "5 j m .a b rsr f , y . ST. 87c ;. mfmT' Seedless ; AJM C Snowdrift ,' TQnfe U.S. No. 1 Quolitv Shortening ' ' r 'VC Sweet ond juicy ID. Li "-J j-q 1 mPJ'? or snack time nibbling. 3-lb. can OYC Xp CatgfoO0d Peaches L"3 ... 19c Bell Peppers 3125c ;.. 2129c ""ges 5 1 Carrots Cri!p "J s"appy ,r'l 10c Bananas Fary 6 .s,.1.00 Mustard - TUNA 4i$l JELL-WELL 6 s49l 20 Vi or j 1 QAQlity "eih11 , iBoloana . iq .ItW FISHCAKES LINK SAUSAGE RATH SMOKIES Preooked, ready A( beef N(JW Vacuum packed to heat and serve. toste treat, lblLOC smoked sausages. 12 o, pkg, for y breQkfast speaa it. fi. 2 oz pockages Ea. J Giants But Not Pec Wee: "Really? That was pretty good, Diz." Dizzy: "Yep, a lotta times the umpire hadda call 'cm by the sound." Two Bump Heads Dizzy: "Look at that! I never seen two ball ketchers butt heads in my life hardern they did. They're laid up, all right, they're hurt but boy, it was somep'n to see on television. Pee Wee: "He has a three point, five-eighths earned run av erage." 'I can't swear to this one. but it sounded like "three, point, five-eighths.") HERALD AND NEWS, Klamnih Z, o ; SKt&GJ Thompson v . COPYRIGHT lwa, SArEWAY STORES, Dizzy: "He dove back in there If he'd a-slud, he'd a-made it." Dizzy: That batter's shakin' his head he don't know. I don't know what he don't know, but I know he don't know. Look at tliem um pires, they don't know neither. They're talkin' to each other and shakin' their heads like they don't know. And that third base coach, he's liftin' his hands he don't know. And I don't know. If I knowed what they don't know, I'd tell ye." Pee Wee: "Podres has always had a bad back. He stood outta Kalis, Oregon Monday, More variety? Of course! Finest quality? Naturally! Greater savings? Yes, yes! These are just a few reasons there's always more for you at Safeway. You'll find USDA Choice meats, close-trimmed to remove excess waste and fat; sparkling fresh fruits and vegetables; famous brand groceries; .. . ii. . r I r X f tizing delicatessen Tooas; Tavorire thing on INCORPORATED Always the service for a while with a bad back. Pee Wee: "Where Diz?" you gom Takes Leave Dizzy: "Get a steak sandwich. Be back in 20, 30 minutes." Dizzy: "Stan the Man's on first. Now he tosses his skull cap over to the coach so that it'll lighten the load, case he has to run to second." Dizzy: "Got a wire today from George (Doaks, or some such name i. Says he remembers when I's just breaking in when I s 17 and he said at that time that this July 15, 19(13 PAGE 7 your shopping list. Pricei effective Monday, July IS thru Wednesday, July 17 ot Safeway in Klamath Falls . . . Wa t r3 .. ........ lorvt tho right to limit. Bn The City boy would be a great pitcher. And George, if you're listening in today, I wanta tell you, you was right. I was a g-r-e-a-t pitcher..." Dizzy: "Folks, reason we had da laugh up here at that was that if that guy hadn't swang and hit it, it woulda hit him r-i-g-h-tl in the belly." perfect frozen foods; fresh bakery treats; appe- I .1,1 . l.: M... . neairn ana Deaury aias Mrs. Wright's Famous WE GIVE III rvir I III re- wmm Dean is meticulous in his lin guistics and never would commit the grammatical gaucheria of us ing "like" as a conjunction, when all the other broadcasters use the more tidy "as." Like the follow, ing, on a windy day: "That high fly was blown right in from cen ter field, as you seen on your screen. CANCEL YOUR MORTGAGE Through , . . Equitable' Living Iniuronco John H. Houston Sfrvlcw- Since l!P'M , . . practicuuy every ill I
