Image provided by: Yamhill County Historical Society; McMinnville, OR
About Yamhill reporter. (McMinnville, Or.) 1883-1886 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 4, 1883)
A SONG BY A CONIEVTED FELLOW. “No more than’one might ! interrupted Joscelind, with i catory motion of the hand. | ants are mere frauds, nowadays!" “And nothing goes right snout the | place." I “Nothing ‘ever’ does!" said Josce- ’ lind. , | Uncle Black eyed r, her qneerly. don’t know what his temper has got. to be,’ said she, and I’m going to' Oh, ’tis all on» to ma, all one, Whether I've money or «hather I’ve none. show him.’ And, bless her sweet heart, her plan has worked like a He who has money can buy him a wife, charm!” And he who has none o tn be free for life. It had, in good truth. Uncle Black He who has money can traie if he choose, wa3 a changed man. And Joscelind And he who has none has nothing to lose. had relapsed into the original sun He who has money hi» cures not a few, shine of her temper- and all the do And he who has none on sleep the night Thi„ waH llito different froln the de- mestic wheels of Black Grange through. . • x1. . , termined cheerfulness and systematic seotued to revolve on velvet. He who has money can »quint at the fair, . good spirits of her three sisters. But Uncle Black took all the credit And he who has none escapes with much ' At breakfast, the next morning, to himself. He never knew that Jos care. Uncle Black began to scold, as usual, celind had taught him a lesson. He who has money can go to the piny. i “Fish he. “This ----- again!" said ..... ----- . “We get along nicely,” said he. And he who hue none at home can stay. makes four mornings in the week “now that my niece. has subdued »,„.1 tish. » ” those little tempers of hers.” we’ve had He who has money can travel about. And hi who has none can do without. “I detest fish!" said Joscelind, ____________ And Joscelind ______ was his ___________ heiress and j pushing away her plate with a gri- darling after all—for he will always He who has money can be coarse at will, mace. lieli ive that it was he who “formed And he who hue noue can be courser still. “And the rolls heavy again!” \ her character.” BIG SWELL. all sorts NOTORIETY. Ranks high—Old butter. A shell race- Oysters. Ara the New.pi.per> to Bl»,,,,.. . Curious Circumstances that Brought dent An.wer to u Great * Food for thought—fish. Together Billy Cripps and Jimmie clant. ot 'Hu. Billduck. The light guard—a glass chimney. Match safe—the married man. This is the view that some p^l Another mammoth cave—the latest “Streaks o’ wet weather mos’ alluz are taking of the prevalence of* I leather failure. fetches bad luck,” said the Old Set The hight of the season—cayenne cide and other forms of violent chi —that the newspapers are parth I tier of Pipe county. Pa., “but I never pepper. sponsible. They give more ot U. I see a wet season sech ez this un’s ben A leading feature at a horse show— but I think o' the bully luck that The halter. space, according to their eh...J*! Billy Cripps tumbled into in tbe fall All dogs have their daze when hit to news of this kind. Persons of (L I o’ '39. Uncle Jonas Billduck had a with a club. lower grades of intelligence especially I farm down in Jersey. Durned if I - There’s always room for one mower read the criminal records. eonceptioZ I don’t b’lieve tbe apples they raised —in the hay field. of murder and self murder becom» I Coal men are familiar with the familiar to them, and when som, | on that farm of a season would a weighs that are dark. bought the hull o’ Lackawack. Billy The successful photographer ¡8 a crisis comes the mind turns mon I He who han money can drink the Lett wine, i growled Uncle Black, breaking one ! wanted to marry Jonas ’ darter Je- _ _ i -------------- -**• --------- swiftly to the thought! that ends with I And he who hat none with the gout will not | open. man of oxteusive views. the CANDLES AND LAMPS OF ANTIQUITY. pine. inime, but tbe ole man didn’t seem to a blow or a pistol shot than it would I Guns kick a good deal 4he same as “Please give me the plate. Uncle . It is from a passage in Apuleiue’s like the notion, though he hain’t He who has money the cash most pay, if it were not already saturated with I men do — with what ’ s in their breech- And he who has none Bays “Charge it, I Black,” said Joscelind; ana she rang | Metam, IV. that we get the most val nothin’ agin’ Billy ’cept that he 1 es. such ideas. And this is only partnf I the table-liell sharply. ■ liable and conclusive information on pray.” Orain merchants seldom indulge the general indictment which¡is often I Betty, the cook, a stout, good- this point. A noise being heard in wa’n’t rollin’ very much in wealth. Ke who han money must die some day, “Wall, in '36 the apple crop was , in short stories; they prefer cereak. made—that publicity is one ol th I And he who has none must go the same way. humored Irishwoman, made her ap- the middle of the night we are told pearance. _ _ j that the household come in with I immense. Uncle Jonas he’d more'n i Can anybody give ub the address crying evils of the age. These crities I Oh, ’tin all one to me, all one, “ Betty, ” said Miss Darkridge, “ be "ta-dls, lucerna, sebaeeis, et ceteris. ” -' “ ji ( lutriua, nruatriB, ri vricun, say that nothing is sacred again« I j big sheer, like the rest on ’ em. One • of the man whose name is Legion! Whether I’ve money or whether I’ve none [ I so good as to throw these rolls out of that is, with torches of pine, lamris. 1 day a smart neighbor o’ his’n got an When a Wall street man goes to a the inquisitiveness of the newspaper, I winrLuv " A_11 _ ____ Jl._ _ _ J __ _ ?_ . _ .L!-L the window.” i tallow candles, and was tapers, which . idee. He come to Jonas and argied sulphur spring he gets a taste of Private life is invaded, and the titre« I UNCLE BLACK'S HEIRESS. light of the press beats into even I Betty stared. therefore clearly proves that candles, I that mes' likely the chances was, ' “futures.” home. ”1 “Do you hear what I tell you?” both of wax and tallow, were in use b’gosh, that nex’ year the apple “I can get along with him. j, ; ■ said The original D ’ Arc horse is sup- There <Are newspapers and news I Miss Darkridge, with emphasis. | at this date. It seems, however, that very sure,” said Joscelind Darkridge. j And Betty flung the rolls among the candle was probably used by the crop’d be a dead failur’, an’ taat [ posed to have been that which Joan papers, of course, and some of them I “Nobody could get along with him!” j | the rosebushes, where they were I poorer people. At all events, the nat’rally there’d be a big call for first rode. have a good deal to answer for I chorused the three other Miss Dark speedily devoured by Cato, tbe New ! lamp was a mark of respectability, as dried apples. Is the black man who runs the Those that make a trade of sensation “‘Now, Uncle Jonas,’ says he, ridges in unison. ’ three-card game a native of Monte foundland dog, and Rob aud Roy, the ■ in another verse of Martial (Apoph, ’ ‘we’ll jist kind ’ogo pardners lik», an’ plism are not scrupulous as to either Uncle Black was the personage of setters. j 42) we find that an apology is made i peel an’ dry a snortin’ ole pile o’ ap negro ? their matter or their manner of pre whom they spoke—a crabbed, ill- | I two “But what am I to eat for break-I for the use of a wax light instead of ' pies this fall, lay ’em over, an’ ketch i A newspaper reporter accidentally seuting it. But a little reflection will tempered, little old man—who lived fast? ” bewailed Uncle Black. j a lamp: the market heavy when it gets a 1 knockel a ladder down, but immo show any one that these form com in a superb old country seat among I Grackeis, of course, said Josce -I «Qi» tibi nocturnes pmstabit cereua igni diately set about righting it up. hankerin’ fur sech goods nex’ fall,’ paratively a small class among the the Catskills. lind. “Anything is better than im- j Subducts eet puero uamque lucerna tuo.” “The idee struck Uncle Jonas, an’ A sailor is called an old salt be journals of the country. Charles He had money to leave, but bis periling one’s digestion with such Juvenal (III. 287) also speaks of the niecesand uephewB secretly believed stuff as this! And Betty, if you send , “breve lumen candehe.” In theBrit- he sot the hull family pselin’ apple», ' cause the minute he gets on shore he Dudley Warner, in speaking on the | subject of the press two or three that it would be a deal easier to go to up any more fish in a month, you may I jBh Museum, too, there is a fragment an’ 'twa'n't long’fore tney had 4(X) or is in a pickle. California or Golconda, or some of consider yourself discharged—do you of a large candle found in Vaison. 500 bushel» o’ dried apples on hand. | Nobody ever thought it necessary years ago, said that the moral too« Uncle Jonas's house wa’n’t a very of a newspaper was usually higher those fabulous places, and dig fort hear?” near Orange, and said to belong to , large un, an’ it stood ’bout fifty foot to urge a pawnbroker to take more than that of the community in which unes out, nugget by nugget, thau to ! interest in his business. “But, my dear, l am rather fond of I the first century A. C Such candles from the line o’ a pastur’ lot b’longin’ it was printed. There was no little stay at home und earn them by mak fish, Rowing men always said it would truth in this observation. Even the ” put in the old gentleman. were probably provided with wicks to Hoppy Dusenberry. Nor mor’n ing themselves acceptable to an old take a strong team to beat Hanlan, most sensational newspaper hardly “One can t eat tish the ‘whole time, consisting of tbe pith of rushes rude- gentleman who had as many augles said Jos 'elind, imperiously. “Here, i jy covered with crude wax or tallow. 100 foot from one side o’ the house, and it has taken a Teenier. furnishes crime and scandal enough as a rose diamond, and as many Betty, this coffee inn t fit to drink! Candlesticks lor these existed, and whar they was only one winder, an’ It is a grave question in onr mind to satisfy its readers, and the respect prickly spikes of temper and dispo and the toast is burned; and you ; later on they had a spike to penetrate , that was up stairs, they was quite a whether Mr. Courtney could beat an steep knoll, an’ at the foot o’ this able newspaper has to make up in sition as a porcupine. must have put the cooking butter on • the butt of the candle. However, the Naomi Darkridge had tried it first. the table by mistake!’ Let these er name candelabrum was more gener- Jonas hed built a high wall. The i egg.—[Cincinnati Enquirer. He can’t mind to do without the custom of s groun’ twixt that an’ the house was i even beat the shell. large portion of the community be Naomi was a soft voiced, slender girl, rors be rectified at once.” j any HpplieJ to the pillar on which the stony, an’ wa’n’t used fur anything, When Fogg was asked regarding cause it will not pander to a diseased with a head which reminded one of a Betty retired, with an ominous I oil lamp stood or from which it was so Jonas concluded to spread his the latest additions to the English appetite for details of revolting crimes drooping lily. of her stiffly-starched apron. ! I suspended. Since no attempt was dried apples on boards twixt the language, he said he would ask his or unclean gossip. There is another “No one can help loving Naomi,” rustle “My dear,’ said Mr Black, rather luaJo to . provide for tbe current of r house and the wall. He built a roof ................. on which the newspapers are »aid Mrs. Darkridge, as she kissed her apprehensively. “Betty is a very old —‘---- -------------- ' proper combus over 'em, an’ thar he had ’em stowed wife. She always had the last word. point air so necessary for daughter good-bye. The tailors of America will meet liable to be misunderstood by the servant, and—•” tion, these old lamps smoked exceed away snug enough. But in three weeks Naomi came in convention at Philadelphia next public, through lack of information. “I don’t care if she is the age of “Wall, that fall Billy Cripps was month. We presume they w;ll meet The public doos not see, and there back, half frightened out of her wits, i Methuselah,” said Joscelind; “no ingly—so much, indeed, that it was fore cannot appreciate, the vigilance “He scolds so dreadfully,” said body can be expected to put up with the duty of one of the slaves of the pesterin’ the old man more'n ever to to discuss measures, not men household to go round each morning let up an' give him Jemine. One day which is exercised in every respect Naomi. “Aud he looks at me as the such wretched cookery as this!” The man who uses profane language and wipe the soot from the pictures Jonas got mad. able newspaper office to keep such wolf must have looked at Little Red “I really think she is not so bad, and statues. In one ease, however, “ ‘See yer. Billy.’ says he, ‘I’m a may have considerable dash about news out of its columns. More care Riding Hood. Oh, mamma, 1 couldn’t | if—’’ him, but he is running a risk of going at the ErectliQum of tbe Athens, gittin' durn tired o’ this. They ain’t stay there, not if I was to be made “Ob, pray don't apologize for her, Acropolis, the lamp, which was of no use. You’re jist ez likely to git I where they have altogether too much aud discretion are needed in thii matter than the average reader real richer thau Miss Burdett Coutts her Uncle Black!” said Joscelind. "They ■' pure gold, was provided with a flue. Jemime ez 1 am to be a livin’ over colon. izes. The system of news collection self!” are all shiftless, lazy creatures, who I This was a very large lamp, requir thar in Hoppy Dusenberry’s pastur! A St. Louis brewer was killed the becomes more complete every year, Magdalen Darkridge went next; I must be discharged promptly if they other day by being struck with the ing to be tilled but once a year. Cal Now. the fus’ fine mornin’ you come and the field is swept more thorough but Magdalen, although a fine, tall don’t do their duties.” limachuB designed it for the qew tern 'long this way an’ find me a livin’ head of an exploding beer barrel. girl, with a spirit, of her own, was Uncle Black began to look fright pie about 400 B. C., but the smoke over thar, jist walk in. tell me, an’ Getting at lager beads is extremely ly each time than the time before. The wheat and chaff come in together cowered by Uncle Black’s savage eyes ened. He had kept Betty, Sylvia and was found to be so great an evil in | i then you kin walk off with Jemine.' dangerous. and it is the province of the clean in less than a week. old John for ten years. Was it pos anything designed for such a purpose “Ez mad ez he were. JonaH had to The editor who kicked a poet down newspaper to see that as little of the “I’d sooner sweep crossings for a sible that he had scolded at them for that the lamp was provided with a laugh to think o ’ the joke o ’ the stairs apologized to a friend who had latter is used as possible. Probably living," said she, “than to be Uncle | ten years, only to have Joscelind chimney in the shape of a bronze thing. Billy ho toddled off an’ made come in to steal exchanges by saying the average reader would be surprised Black's heiress.” Darkridge outscold him now? palru tree inverted. But however up his mind that he and Jemine that he couldn't help it; he had a if he could see the quantity of news And so she camo homo without loss “1 wouldn’t be too short with 'em, magnificent and elaborate the design, couldn’t never hitch. sole for poetry. of time. that is thrown qsideeach day because my dear, if I were you!" he remon it is certain that the economy of the “The season had been wet all Rhoda Darkridge, in no wise strated. “Poor creatures!” exclaimed Mrs. it is not of a kind that ought to come lamp remained stationary. " It was through the summer, an’ was keepin’ Grosgrain, looking at the pictures of before the eyes of his girls and boys abashed by the successive failures of “Then lot them do their duty!” her sisters, was the third one to try said Joscelind, with tbe air of an em i generally filled with olive oil and pro it up. One night, jist arter Jonas nude savage women; “no clothing of At the same time, the papers must vided with a wick of either oakum or had give Billy Cripps his last walkin’ any kind! I wonder what the poor print the news. The widespread Black Grange and its possibilities. press. But sha also succumbed before the j “We are all mortal," pleaded Uncle of the dearer Caspian flax (cotton.) papers, there come up an ole tearer things have to talk about?” publication of a murder arouses a Occasionally, Pliny informs us, bitu of a rain—one o’ them warm fellers terrible scourge of Uncle Black’s [ Black. A girl named Gable in a New Eng whole community, and often brings a men was used to till the lamp. Italy, that soaks right iD. There was a tongue. “I expect every one around me to in some parts, being rich in springs rippin’ wind come ’long with it. I land town shot and wounded a bur thousand eyes and ears to tbe help “It’s scold, snarl, snarl, scold, from live up to their conditions,” said Jos of that mineral and pretrolium. Fur recomember twere on Saturday night, glarwho was trying to get in at a of justice. Then, too, there is a morning till n'ght!” said .Rhoda, as celind. I natural aud pardonable curiosity with ther east, and especially among the fur Uncle Jonas’ family alluz took a window. It was a good thing for regard to some sensational occur in three days’ time she tearfully re him that it was not a house of seven Uncle Black ate the rest of his tribes dwelling on the shores of the rest Sunday mornin's, not gittin’ up lated her experience to her parents. rences that must be satisfied. When breakfast with but little appetite. Dead Sea. bitumen and naphtha were ’fore half-past 6 or 7. That Sunday Gables. “Ob, ycu don’t know nobody can Sylvia, the housemaid, was finishing The better class of people—those men hear of a friend’s death, they know—what a dreadful man Uucle dusting his library as he entered it. much used as illuminating agents, mornin’, though, there come a ran at are eager to know tbe details of his and for other purposes. It may be the door »’fore 6 o’clock. Jonas got who have a proper respect for them sickness, or the accident that befell Black is!” “ Not through yet? ” growled Uncle selves and their surroundings — will suggested that the sacred pit tireNep- up an ’ dressed hisself an' went down. “Oh, hang the old scamp!” said I have nothing to do with watermelons, him, or if he has gone astray, to Mr. Darkridge, who was of a free- [ Black, the fretwork of wrinkles once ti was of this nature. The well- Thar was Billy Cripps. understand how and why. This is a more coming into bis brow. because they are always so seedy. known Egyptologist, Mr. Basil “ ‘ Mornin ’ Uncle Jonas, ’ says he. and easy nature, and thought his human instinct, to which few of us I “ Sylvia, ’ said Miss Darkridge, Coopor, has suggested the following “ ‘ Mornin. ’ says Uncle Jonas. Why ¡ b Miss L., who tells so many are superior. It is the delicate duty girls a great deal too sweet and nice severely, “ if this happens again, I as the origin of the word naphtha, ‘What in the name o’ the grizzly untruths, like a microscope? Because to be snarled at by any rich old dispense with your services! namely: N A, water of Phtha, the king be you doin’ yer this time o’ she is a magnifying lass. [Critics of the newspaper to satisfy it without miser. “Let him alone. My daugh shall going so far as to make its news Look at that clock!" Hephrestos, or Vulcan of Egypt’s day.’ will say this pun doesn’t “g;” but we demoralizing. ter needn’t go negging for any wan'» ‘My dear,” said Uncle Black, “Syl deities, the god of fire. This idea re “‘Wall, says Billy, ‘I were jist all know who the critics are. ] money.” If the extreme publicity of the pres Bitt here Joscelind. the youngest, via is generally a very good girl, l ceives some support from the fact goin’ by, and seen as you’d moved A young man went into the kitchen, ent day is an evil—and there are if — ” that the Indians who sold the first over inter Hoppy Dusenberry ’ s tallest and prittiest of the four girls, where his girl was baking, and in when it seems so—what, shall "Dear Uncle,” interrupted Josce 1 petroleum (as Seneca oil. and used it I pastur lot, I thort I'd drop in an’ advertently sat down on a hot pie times ■poke up: lie said of the love of notoriety! largely in their rites of worship, lind. “ pray permit me to be the judge ! walk off with Jemime jist ez you “I’ll go!” said she. just from the oven, now boasts that This is the other side of the shield. “You don’t know what you are un of these matters. You have ruled termed it fire-water, which name is tole me to,' says he. he “descended from the ‘upper crust.’ ” The newspapers are accused of prying now applied to alcohol. — | Journal of your household with a slack and in “Sure ez guns, thar were Jonas’s dertaking,” said Naomi, with a shud “It seems to me that the lard is into the affairs of the home, filling the Society of Arts. dulgent baud altogether too long. I: house standin’ plumb over the line der —------- --------------- inter Hoppy's pastur lot. You see diminishing rapidly, Mary.” said the their columns full of offensive per “He'd wear out a stone;” said Mag 1 shall now institute a refoim.” And poor Sylvia had never moved CINCINNATI CULTURE AS SHOWN BY THE the high wind o’ the night afore hed mistress to the servant girl. “Yes’m,” sonalities, etc., and some of them are daleu. PORK MERCHANT S DAUGHTER. lifted the roof ofTn Jonas' dried ap was the reply of the maid; “butthen not without sin in tbe matter. But “He's a ghoul!” shuddered Rhcda. about so briskly, as she did that day. ! know when you bought it that do the public ever'think of the striv Old John, the gardener, was notex- _ In tbe elegant o _____ ____ __ of _ a ple shed. The warm rain had belted you drawing-room “I can get along with him, I am it was short’ning. ing and labor on the part of a large i empt from bis share of the general Cinciuuati pork merchant ’ s mansion in on 'em, and soaked inter ’ em very sure,” said Joscelind, brightly. class in the community to get them President Grevy is fond of going [ turmoil. Miss Darkridge chanced to a large company was assembled. All through an ’ through. Wall you And she packed up her little trunk, i I overhear her uucle reproaching the the luxury that wealth could com know dried apples. They jist begun into the kitchen and bossing the cook. selves into the newspapers—yes, and and went to Black Grange. old man for some fancied neglect in mand contributed to the gratification to swell an’ swell. They couldn’t [New York Journal. Thereby revers even their home affairs! This hunger It was sunset—a red, flaming sun for notoriety is seen in all classes— set, like one of Gifford’s pictures— the flower beds, whose diamonds, j of the guests. Upon a blue satin push the wall down, but sumpin’ had ing the usual order cf things. The rich and poor, learned and ignorant when she came up the terraced flight j ovals and cresents of brilliant colors divan the pork merchant’s daughter, to give. That sumpin’ were the cook generally bosses the gravy. If business men, professional men, of step* that led to the old house. | were the pride of his horticultural gorgeous in silks and pearls and dia house. Ez them 500 bushels o’ ap we were that cook we’d gravy the writers, soldiers and poets. This Everything blushed blood red in the heart, and she came promptly to his monde, was conversing with a friend. ples kep’ a doublin’ tfieirself in size, boss.—[Boston Star. J Presently her father approached and they jist quietly puihed that house “What are you going to do when tendency, too, has to be held in check deep light, and Joscelind could see I Rid. along, b'gosh, never wakix.’ a mortal you grow up if you don’t know how If the growth of the newspaper has how lovely was tbe scenery; how sub “Gardening, indeed! Do yon call! RR’d: developed the vice of publicity, it has “Pauline, I want to say a word to up in it, till they landed it safe an' to cipher?” asked a school teacher of itself stantial thia old gray house, with its this gardening?” she said. “Uncle been developed and impelled by a slow boy. sound over on Hoppy Dusenberry ’ » square towers and semi circular, col Black, I'm astonished that you keep 1 you.” “I’m going to be a school teacher a kindred vice—the love of publicity' ------- ’ lot. Wall, o’ course Jonas onnaded porch. Uncle Black stood such a man as this about the place!" | The girl arose and accompanied t pastur And the torrent of taunts and re- l>*'r parent to the seclusion of a bay couldn't go back on his word, an’ and make the boys do tbe ciphering,” 1 —I New York Tribune. on the steps, in a wig and black silk i Billy got ' de gal. But the dried ap- was the reply. " stockings, surmounted by huge silver preaches which she showered upon window. A DELIBERATE SEARCH FOR CHEEK. the luckless head of poor old John “Pauline,” began the old man. pies was «p’ilt.” kneebuckles. “Too bad! only one instead of two We hear of all sorts of develop And the Old Settler took his um- weeks’ vacation this summer!” grum “No you are Joscelind’’’ said Uncle was enough, as that individual ob “there's a couple of Cleveland dudes >n the dining room having a hot talk brella out of the wood box and went bled Racket throwing himself back ment in ideas in these days, but the Black, surveying her with little twiuk-1 aervad, "to make one.s flesh creep.” "My niece is a young lady of spirit »bout Copernicus. I was afraid they home beaming.—[New York Sun. ling eyes, like black beads. in the hammock. “Never mind, dear.” latest is that of a young man of my “Yes, I am Joscelind!" said the I and energy,” apologized Mr. Black, were going to ask me to decide the replied tbe consoling Mrs. R; “you acquaintance who is natuAlly modest retiring, and who has deliber bright-cheeked girl, giving him a when at last Joscelind had gone back j dispute, so I made some excuse n to get “ ! M ore H eartless than a C at .—Fri- know, half a loaf is better than none.” and ately set about curing himself of I to the house. I out aud come to you. J Now ’ kiaa. tell mo. (]ay morning a little three year old The convicts working in chain I basfifulness and acquiring cheek by# “Verra like you, sir— verra like who Corpenicus, “You’re lata!” said Uncle Black. •«»> was iti * »> i anyhow?" ’ ’i i- Andy Glover’s in Schley gangs in Alabama coal mines die at “ < Ob, “I am late." said Joscelind. "I you!” said old John, scratching his b, father,” exclaimed I auline. county. Gi. was delighted beyond the fearful rate of eighty-seven per . regular course of expedients formal : ing himself conspicuous and crest- , “I how could , you be so ignorant? „ ___ Why, measure, aud called his sister's at- thousand per month. thought the old thing of a stage never i ¡lead. | ing remarks. Therefore comes he "Like me!" said Mr. Black, slowly. Rny »chool-boy knows who Corperni- tent ion to h “nice ittle bushy tail would have got hero. The horses Eleven police justices in New York And he stood tor full five minutes, cus was. He sailed from Palos, I R1I1W)11 fairly crept and the roeds were kitten playing on the barn with the draw salaries of ¡$8,000 each, or nearlv in and out of church at udiwu * I hours, stands up in the cars and f quite speechless and motionless, star- j Spain, on the (( ca horrul” me 3d .M of or August. August, 1492, 141'2, and o[ ld cat. ( •• " The sis^r looked and was * *^Iuerlca “It's a dreadfully warm day," ling down at the mossy rim of an ! ** following surprised to see a squirrel romping as much as the judges on the Su sits down on the boats, scramble# preme Bench at Washington. for front Beats and places of obsei' I ancient sun-dial, half sunk in the October. growler! Uncle Black. . . over the roof of the barn with the The M omen's Christian Temper vation everywhere; and in a general “I'm almost roasted." sighed Josce- velvety grass. The * venerable purveyor of swine house cat. They seemed on tbe best “Like—me!” gazixl exnltingly at his daughter a terms, would roll over together, just ance Union of Missouri has sixty-five way tries to copy some of his bn#- lind. "There's no khowin' the masther,' moment and then said, with a sug- life® two playful kittens. Glover’s unions, forty-five of which are aux fling associates. I regret that so far “The whole summer has been in f(imlly on for a long while at iliary to the new State organization. | his efforts are not promising to avail d,” said Bel Betty, in the geetion of sadness m his tones: tolerably warm,” said the old gentle . he's that changed,'' 1 kitchen, a week or so after. “ > He’s as man. 1 auline. my child, if I had your antics of the squirrel and cat Some Cincinnati Hebrews have : much toward the end desired. But “We might ns well l»e in the tropics mild as a lamb and as peaceable as a b™>nsl might have been a I nited An older acn of Mr. Glover's then been eating clams, crabs, frogs' legs it must not be inferred that all these states Senator from Ohio. —[Brook tooka shot gun and killed the squir- and other forbidden fruit, and are I young men at the theaters who come and done with it,” retorted Joscelind, kitten." “Sure, isn’t that jus* what the i *^n ,L8Kle- flinging off her shawl and fanning I pel, whereupon the cat became getting criticisms from Jewish papers. in late and leave early and rush for young lady told said Sylvia, herself vehemently. ---------- - *• ----------- ' strangely distressed and would not ' The body of a fox was found near the door at the close of each act Uncle Black gave her the key« that “when she came down into* the Sydney Rosenfeld has completed be comforted. She walked around Newport the other day. after a fash trampling over dresses and French night, just as he had three times be kitchen that first morning before the an i arrangement with Michael Gunn, Clunn. mewing and calling, bnt but the poor ionable hunting party had returned boots and disturbing alike feminine fore given them to her three sisters. tire waa lighted, and told ns as she of Dublin, to produce his comic little squirrel did not go to the call. from the chase. The verdict of the flounces and equanimity, are pupil# “I shall expect you to take charge was goin’ to try an experiment and opera, "The Mystic Isle," in London. Her playmate being dead, the cat hid coroner's jnry was, “Died from fatty of his school.—[Boston Globe. ___,__ __ _______ of the whole establishment,'' said he. we wasn't to mind a won! she said, They mi^ht “strike ___ ile” by firing off in the barn and kept out of sight— degeneration of the tissues, caused ,, ground hog very obviously make* ‘cause it was all by contraries. ‘He n Gunn . ’s piece in this The servants are miserable—” . country? i [Sumter Republican. by lack of exercise.” ths best sausages.