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About The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933 | View Entire Issue (May 25, 1900)
ON THITHER COAST. Sew Gold Field on the Siberian Shore Will Bo Opened to Ameri can Hlneri. New gold fields rivaling in richness the deposits of Cape Nome will be opened to American miners, if the ex pectations of the members of the Rus sian expedition, which arrived in New York on the Campania, on its way to Northeastern Siberia, are fulfilled. Vladimir Wonlarlarsky, a colonel of the Russian Imperial Guard, obtained the contusion of the Siberian tract which the expedition is to examine. ' There were more than 40 applicants for the grant, which had been songht with eagerness since the discovery of gold on the American side of Behring sen. By means of conrt influence, Wonlarlarsky carried off the prize. He formed a cflmpany in Russia, which planned the present expedition, headed by A. Bog danovitch, a Russian engineer. It ir understood that a subsidary company has been formed in England in con nection with the concesHion, but sec recy is maintained in regard to the English and American interests. Miners who have visited the Siberian coast by stealth have reported that it it practically the same as the Nome coast, cormirting of a strip of beach, behind which lies a tundra, or belt of gold bearing sand. Many companies have been formed to work dredges and pumps off the coast of Cape Nome, in order to draw ud the oreoioos sand where it reaches the beacb. It is expected that the operation of these appliances will be prevented by the beach miners, and that apparatus in which large capital bus been invested will be idle, unless now fields ar opened to it. If the ex pedition to Siberia, finds what it ex pects, the company will invite pumps and dredges to cross to the Mberian shore and operate there upon payment of a royalty. Ilooley, the English promoter, has nothing to do with the plan. George D. Roberts, who is a veteran California miner, will be a member of the explor ins party. Mr. Roberts has made study of gold deposits in sea sands, and has a plan for A trading the gold from the frozen tundra. The expedition will sail from San Francisco about June 1, after the Russians have conferred with the Russian minister at Washington. It will return abont November 1, and expects then to make a complete report of the possibilities of the region. Mr. Roberts said today that, from information' he had received, the de posit of gold on the Siberian coast promised to be the most valuable ever discovered. No attempt will be made to work the tundra'this year, but the party hopes to be able to make some contracts with American owners of pumps and dredges. Northwest Notes. The Oregon Ilopgrowers' Association last week sold 670 bales of hops. A telephone exchange with 20 sub scribers is to be established in Canyon City, Or. The Umatilla Indians have invited the Nex Perces, of Idaho, to join thera in a" Fourth of Jnly celebration that will last about a week. The Shamokawa, Wash., creamery is now turning out 175 pounds of gilt edge butter daily. It finds a rdy market in Portland at top-notch prices. The new creamery located at Nor way, Or., has commenced operations. The plant is complete in every respect and is in charge of a competent man ager. Camas Prairie, southeast from Hepp ner, Or., is a great dairy region, and 800 cows are being milked there. The creameries pay 82 to 83 oents per 100 pounds for milk. The original townsite of Prairie City, Or., was 80 acres. A land company has just platted additions to the extent of 3114 acres, providing lib erally for depot grounds, repair shops, etc. Asotin, Wash., will soon have a bank, arrangements having been made to establish such an enterprise there by E. J. and V, L. Thompson, recently of Wisconsin. The bank will be organ ized under the state banking laws and will begin with a paid in capital of 125,000. The Anti-Saloon Leagut, at Colfax, Wash., has a membership of about 8i, persons, who are antagonistic to the saloon, and more especially to such as may violate the liqnor selling laws. Active work is to be begun by the organization against the liquor trafllo in tho near future. Grant connty offered a reward of $450 for the recapture of Al Keeton, held for murder, and William Wallace, charged with horse stealing, and it was divided equally between William By ram and Ray Short, of Canyon City; Ed Luce and liamp Officer, of John Day, and W. C. Gibbs, of Susanville. G. W. Kiger lias a contract from the government to furnish 2,000 tons of rock to be placed behind the spur dikes recently constructed in Tillamook bay. As it is seen that the dikes are doing the work for which they were intended, the rock is for the purpose of making them permanent. Mr. Kiger will re ceive $1 a ton for the rock. Failing to get all the saw timber needed into the river last winter, be cause of lack of snow, William Codd, the Colfax sawmill owner, has deter mined to haul the necessary logs to water on wheels. An outfit of 10 or 1 2 big teams was sent into the woods on the upper Palouse river for this pur pose. The necessary feed and supplies were taken from Colfax.. This will be a rather costly method of floating saw logs, but the lumber demand is good aud it is found necessary in order to meet the calls. A hardware man of Independence, Or., sold nin incubators and nine brooders recently, and the Inference is drawn that chickens will be numerous in that market this year. John 8. Ilerrin, who owns one of the finest bands of sheep in the Rogue river valley, numbering 2,600 head of the French merino breed, is engaged iu hearing, having a fore of six men. He has introduced a ' alioep shearing machine, run by footpower, the three clippers being the first in this section. They take off more wool than the old hears and do a humane Job. BRADSTREET'S REPORT. Wheat Blgher oa CnfaYorable C'op Reports. Braditrett's says: Continued dull ness in many branches and a further shading in several staple lines consti tute the leading features in the busi ness situation this week. The weak ness of prices is displayed in lower quo tations for corn, pork, butter, cheese, wool and cotton among the great agri cultural products and petroleum and lead among the mineral products. Wheat is slightly higher, partly owing to less favorable crop reports here and abroad. Continued dryness in the Northwest has given the spring wheat situation a less satisfactory appearance and there is little improvement noted in the winter wheat sections of the central west. It is doubtful, however, if the dry weather has as yet really affected the spring wheat, the chief complaint coming from the lumber in terests, which reK)rt low streams inter ferring with the forwarding of supplies. The industrial situation is, on the whole, rather muth better than for some time past, in that new disturb ances are fewer and some old ones have been settled. But practical tie-ups in Chicago are still unbroken. At St. Louis all kinds of business have been hurt by the strike of street railway employes, and uncertainty at other cities, particularly in Die building trade, has had an unsettling effect upon lumber. Wheat, including flour, shipments for the week aggregate 5,178,422 bush els, against 3,480,574 bushels last week. Business failures in the United States for the past week number 155, as com pared with 174 last week. Failures in the Dominion of Canada are slightly more numerous, numbering 24 for the past week, againstl9 last week. PACIFIC COAST TRADE. Seattle Markets. Onions, $9. Lettuce, hothouse, 40 45c doz. Potatoes, $1617; $1718. Beets, per sack, 50 60c. Turnips, per sack, 4060o. Carrots, per sack, $1. Parsnips, per sack, 60 75c. Cauliflower, California 85 90c. Strawberries $2.25per case. " Celery 40 60o per doz. Cabbage, native and California, 1. 00 1.25 per 100 pounds. Apples, $2.002.75; $3.003.50. Prunes, 60o per box. Butter Creamery, 22c; Eastern 22c; dairy, 1722c; ranch, 1617o pound. Eggs 18c. Cheese rrg-iSc. Poultry 14c; dressed, 14 15c; spring, $5. Hay Fnget Sound timothy, $11.00 12.00; choice Eastern Washington timothy, $18.00 19.00 Corn Whole, $23.00; cracked, $23; feed meal, $23. Barley Rolled or ground, per ton, $20. Flour Patent, per barrel, $3.25; blended straights, $3.00; California, $3.25; buckwheat flour, $6.00; gra ham, per barrel, .$3.00; whole wheat flour, $3.00; rye flour, $3.804.00. Millstuffs Bran, per ton, $13.00; shorts, per ton, $14.00. Feed Chopped feed, $19.00 per ton; middlings, per ton, $20; oil cake meal, per ton, $30.00. Fresh Meats Choice dressed beef steers, price 8c; cows, 7c; mutton 8c; pork, 8c; trimmed, 9e; veal, 8)g 10c. v Hams Large, 13c; small, 13. 4; breakfast bacon, 12)c; dry salt sides, 8c. Portland Market. Wheat Walla Walla. 61 52c; Valley, 52c; Bluestem, 54o per bushel. Flour Best grades, $3.00; graham, $3.50; superfine, $2.10 per barrel. Oats Choice white, 86c; choice gray, 83o per bushel. Barley Feed barley, $14 14.50; brewing, $16.00 16.60 per ton. Millstuffs Bran, $13 per ton; mid dlings, $19; shorts, $15; chop, $14 per ton. Hay Timothy, $9 11; clover, $7 f.6i); Oregon wild hay, $67 per ton. Butter Fancy creamery, 80 85c; seconds, 45u; dairy, 2580o; store, 22i25o. Eggs 13o per dozen. Cheese Oregon full cream, 13c; Young America, 14c; new cheese 10c per pound. Poultry Chickens, mixed, $4.00 4.60 per dozen; bens, $5.00; springs, $3.603.60; geese, $0. 60 (S 8.00 for old; $1.6036.50; ducks, $6.007.00 per dozen; turkeys, live, 1415o per pound. Potatoes 4065oper sack; sweets, I 3 40 per pound. Vegetables Beets, $1; turnips, 75c; per sack; garlic, 7o per pound; cab bage, l.Ho per pound; parsnips, 76; unions, 3c per pound; carrots, 50c. Hops 2 80 per pound Wool Valley, 1213o per pound; Eastern Oregon, 10 15c; mohair, 27 lOo per pound. Mutton Gross, best sheep, wethers and ewes, 8?4'c; dressed mutton, 7 JJbC per pound; lambs, 6 luC Hogs Gross, choice heavy, $5.00; light and feeders, $4.50; dressed, f5. 00 (356. 50 per 100 pounds. Beef Gross, top steers, $4.00 4. 50; cows, $3.504.00; dressed beef, 6 7?4 0 per pound. Veal Large, Qi$THc, small, 8 ?sO per pound. Tallow 5fi)j'c; No. 3 and grease, S.W 40 per pound. San Franeiteo Market. Wool Spring Nevada, 1416oper pound; Eastern Oregon, 12 16c; Val ley, 2023c; Northern, 1012o. Hops 1899 crop, ll18o per pound. Butter Fancy creamery 1717,St'c; do seconds, 1616e; fancy dairy, 16c; do seconds, 14 loo per pound. Eggs Store, 15o; fancy ranch, I7c Millstuffs Middlings, $17.00 0.00; bran, $13.50 13.50. k t' Hay-Wheat$6.509.50;wheatanMf. oat Id.00c49.00; best barley $5.00v: 7.00; alfalfa, $5.006.50 per to straw, 2540c per bale. r hl p Potatoes Early Rose, 60 65c; Ort, gon Burbanks, 70c$1.00; river Bui. banks, 407oc; Salinas Burbankb 80c 1.10 per sack. I Citrus Fruit Oranges, Valencif $3.753.25; Mexican limes, $4.00tf 6.00; California lemons 75c$1.5c do ohoice $l.753.00 per box. Tropical Fruits Bananas, $1.50( ,ou per ouncn; pineapples, notv inal; Persian dates, 6 6. So per pound. HOUSE FOR PIGEONS. FLOCKS SHOULD HAVE A HOME OF THEIR OWN. 4. Large Number of the Birds Mar Be Kept in One Home if It la Ar ranged in the Proper Manner Cats Their Foe. Cats are too fond of pigeons to be permitted to get anywhere near them, and In the arrangement of a bouse for these birds care Is to be taken that these animals cannot disturb them. I 'or a small flock a small bouse may be made round or with eight sides, and with three or four floors. Each side will have a door for the pigeons to enter, and this bouse Is set on a pole firmly placed In the ground and eight feet high or so, and having two cross bars safely fitted to it so that a ladder may be used to get up to the XTERion or no ion noes. bouse. This will do for a dozen birds, half males and half females, for pig eons pair, and each pair must have its own nest For larger flocks a house may be made on the top of a barn, and If the barn has a cupola on top of It, this la the very thing. Twenty, or even forty pigeons may be kept In such a place, but It will be necessnry to have a trap door at the bottom which must be care fully closed every time the house is left, after having been visited. But larger flocks may have to be provided for, and a small flock will soon become a large one, for although these birds have only two young ones In the nest, yet they will nest several times In the year, and the young ones soon go to keeping bouse for them selves. A large number of pigeons may be kept in one house If It Is arranged In a proper manner. And pigeons If left to themselves will soon bring their owner Into trouble, for they are apt to go on to neighbors' newly sown fields, and gather up the seed with much Indus try. This, however, Is easily prevent ed, for these birds love to stay about their home, and If they are regularly fed they will not wander away after food. But If it la thought that the home fields may be Injured by the birds, It may be said that where pig eons have had full opportunity to run over wheat or oat fields (or peas, of which they are extremely fond), yet the seed they eat Is well spent on them, for as a rule the thinning of the seed will Increase the crop, so that the yield at harvest time is often much larger than It would have been but for the pigeons thinning out the seed. If the pigeon house Is kept at the barn, or on It, the birds will not wander away to the fields, unless to one quite close to them. A house large enough for a hundred pigeons Is shown In the draw ings, both the outside and Inside of it The house Is ten by eight feet and the walls are eight feet high. The ar rangement of the Inside Is shown in figure 2. The nest boxes are placed on shelves fastened to the sides of the house, and a roosting platform Is made In front of the shelves. The shelves are supported by props, and the little doors on the outside open on to them. There Is a box In the house in which food Is kept Tor use In stormy weather when the birds do not wish to go out To get a good view of the Inside of the house, bend one band so as to make a short of tube to look through, and use one eye only, shutting the other. This makes the perspective very plain, and shows just bow the house wonld look If one were In It Of course these birds, like all others, must be kept very clean, and the house ihould be swept and sanded twice a week. It will be the least trouble to do 't every day, when a few minutes will lufflce to do the work. The floor should be sanded after every sweeping, and the nests should be dusted with a mix ture of sand and fine gravel, wood ash es and sulphur. There will be no trou ble with vermin If thorough cleanliness Is observed and above all things the sweepings of the bouse should be dls posed or sareiy in trie Darnyard or away from the house, for there Is noth- INTERIOR OF no EON HOUSB. mg more likely to harbor lice or fleas tnd supply a breeding-place for them, ban the sweepings of the house. The nest boxes are each four feet long, nine Inches wide, six Inches high In the front, and ten Inches In the rear. They are divided by partitions luto Ave apartments, each having a separate en trance, which Is four and a half Inches high, and three wide. The picture shows only one side of the house, the other side Is fitted In precisely the same way, and the ends may be occupied by nests as the stock increases. The two e.l-m Ajfta-rootA., tdJf ..tlA ' he ,1 -n ki .7 lMt bom bim " -u TS ins reelings JvM"i uuiuviiae. vue snouiu not overlook the spiritual side. meal without Its cheerful greeting and kludly weather talk. Not even if he would, could he be left out of those' genial discussions begluning witn. "See by the paper we're goiug to bave No one ever feels neglected In ar Milling bouse. No one ever baa try markets and at the country hotels and boarding houses, so that while much pleasure and amusement may be enjoyed, quite a little money may be made as well. But we may be sure that this result will not happen unless the right attention is given, and this Includes regular feeding, and watering, the right kind of food, especial cleanli ness in the house, and protection from cats and winged enemies. MISTAKE OF A NEWSAGENT. Hia Bucolic-Looking Customer Waa a Chicago Detective in Diagulee. When the west-bound New York spe cial on the Michigan Central stopped at Dowaglac, Mich., last Wednesday an elderly man, who possessed all the outward characteristics of a country man, boarded the train and took a seat in the smoker. lie announced in a loud voice to the traveling man across the aisle that be was coming to Chicago to see bis boy. He also gave out the in formation that this was his first trip to the city. The news agent beard him and gave the wink f,o the commercial traveler. It had been a bad trip for the agent and he expected to unload a good share of bis stock on the man from Dowa glac. He tried unsuccessfully to sell him maps, views of Chicago, photo graphs of celebrities, and other things. The countryman's purse remained closed. Presently the wise butcher passed down the aisle with a basket of apples on his arm. He stopped before the Dowaglac man's seat leaned over, and said, loud enough to be heard from one end of tho car to the other. "Apples, three for a cent" and passed on. Now, as a matter of fact his apples were selling at the rate of three for a dime, and everybody knew it His offer to the "yeoman" was unnoticed apparent ly by that party. In a few minutes the agent returned from bis trip through the train, and the countryman beckoned to bim. "Gi'me six apples," be said, and held out his hands to receive them. "All right; three for a dime," the butcher said, as he took six Northern spies from his basket and dropped them Into the passenger's lap. "Now, young feller," said the Do waglac man, "when you pranced through here a minute ago you offered the fruit to me three for a cent. Here's 2 cents for six. Now, run along and be good." "No, you don't " But the agent was Interrupted by the loud shouts cf the other passengers, and retreated to the baggage car. And George Tousley. the Chicago de tective, who had been In Dowaglac on business, divided bis six apples with the commercial traveler. Chicago In ter Ocean. A CUBAN BEAUTY. Senora Abren Is Rich, Charming, Dem ocratic and a Widow. Senor Rosa Abrue Is the richest and probably the most beautiful woman In In Uncle Sam's new possessions. She Is the queen of Cuba society and is a "Cuba llbre" democrat from the crown of her head to the tip of her pearl-encrusted slipper. And she Is a widow. She is possessed of a plantation near Havana covering an area of 20,000 SKNORA. ROSA ABREU. acres under perfect cultivation devot ed to coffee growing. Her income, as may be imagined, is enormous. During the Cuban-Spanish war her plantation was idle, most of her 500 workmen having gone to the front But the patriotic beauty paid every one hla wages all for the good of her coun try's cause. This charming woman lives In a magnificent mansion at Cerro, a pretty little suburb of Ha vana. Her drawing-rooms are noted for their splendor and delusiveness, and officers of the army and navy vie with one another for her favor. But as yet she is heart whole, and, It is freely said, she Is by no means unwilling to change her condition in life when she can find a man who will realize her ideal. She Is especially fond of Amer icans because, she says, Americans "can achieve great deeds," while Cubans and Spaniards can only sigh and play upon a mandolin or guitar. Stand t p to Fit Shoe. "Feople would find less difficulty with ready-made shoes," said the experi enced salesman, "if they would stand up to fit them on Instead of sitting down. Nine persons out of ten, partic ularly women, want a comfortable chair while they are fitting a Bhoe, and It Is with the greatest difficulty you can get thera to stand for a few min utes even after the shoe is fitted. Then, when they bctin walking about they wonder why the shoes are not so com fortable as they were at first trial. A woman's foot Is considerably smaller when she sits In a chair than when she walks about. Exercise brines a larcer quantity of blood into the feet and they swell appreciably. The muscles also require certain space. In buying shoes this fact should be borne In mind." A Legitimate Business. From the district court at the national capitol comes the judgment that the sale of newspapers on the streets Is a legitimate business, and that newsboys have a right to enter street cars and sell papers to passengers, provided they behave themselves and leave the car when their business Is finished. One newsboy was forcibly ejected from a car In Washington some time ago, and had a leg crushed by a car running on the other track. He has just obtained an award of five thousand dollars dam ages from a jury, with instructions to tie above affect. RAISING OF BELGIAN HARES. A New Industry In Southern California That U Proving ProBtable. It is not difficult to become a Bel gian hare fancier; all one has to do is to get a pair of bares. To the inquir ing skeptic the only objectionable fea ture of the fad that now dominates Southern California is the dreadful possibility of the industry. One of the foremost breeders of Los Angeles has made a table of calcula tions showing that if there were no in terference one pair of rabbits in five years' time would have 5,000,000,000, 000 descendants. Fortunately, how ever, the butcher and the furrier form an interference to the outcome of this calculation, else humanity would be shoved off the globe and this earth be come one vaist hutch. It is this extraordinary willingness of the little creatures to increase and multiply that provides the largo profits made in their breeding. In and about Los Angeles there are now ovei 60C "rabbitries," as they are called, each of which contain from 50 to 500 head of valuable stock; a careful estimate puts the number of high grade rabbitt in Southern California at 300,000. The occupation is the subject 0) newspaper jest and topical song hu morist, and in many respects partakes in a spectacular manner of the craze for town lots which swept over South ern California in 1887 like a financial sirocco. The hare faddists, however, claim with reason that there is no speculative feature about their occupa tion and that there can be no danger ol disaster. Hares can be eaten and are eagerly-sought for as an article of food; their pelts are of value, bringing from 25 cents to several dollars each, accord ing to quality. These in the hands ol skillful farriers make sealskin garment! and muffs almost as beautiful as the real thing. In the city markets the flesh of these creatures is as surely fonnd as the roast of beef or the leg oi mutton. It is very popular and the tourist is sure to demand it when he hears encomiums of it uttered by gourmets. It is from the demand for blooded stock that most of the money comes. The services of high grade bocks bring their owners in as much as $4,000 a year. And the aristocratic does are even more profitable. Here is the case of one that was shown at the recent Hare Exposition of Los Angeles. She is named Red Biding Hood, and her owner refused a cash offer of $1,500 for her. This seems like a fabulous price for a rabbit, but the declination of the offer can be more readily under stood when it is stated that the owner obtains an income from this doe alone of $3,000 to $3,500 a year by the sale of her progedy. These figures make the rabbit about the only creature in the world worth its weight in gold. While the industry has only been seriously taken up for a little over a year, experts say that there was at least half a million dollars' worth oi the stock on show at Hazard's pavilion; by the time the next show is held it is safe to state that the value of the stock will be three times that amount. It is difficult to get any average state ment of profits from the business, fox it is too young, and those that follow it have not got the experience that in sures an evenness of income. It can be seen at once, however, that there must be a good profit nnder even ad verse circumstances, and ordinarily a large return on the investment. The capital required is almost nothing. A pair of Belgian hares, a dry goods box for a hutch, and a city lot can produce enough feed for the stock. The pelts bring from 25 cents to a dollar eaoh, while the carcass for meat will bring from 50 cents to 75 cents, and for very large, fat creatures even a dollar. As a doe will have from eight to 15 at a litter five or six times a year, the prob lem of making money resolves itself simply into the provision of sufficient space for the youngsters to frisk about in. The absence of hard work, the neces sary neatness and cleanliness and the ease with which one can engage in the business have of course attracted women, so it is thought that fully half of the rabbitries of this locality are in the hands of women; and the most striking cases of success are among that sex. Dr. Elmer Piatt, general manager of the American Breeders of Belgian Hares, considers that the industry is just in its infancy. "A new feature that our organization intends to take up," he said recently, "will be the canning of hare meat and the tanning of their hides. In both of these branches there is good money to be made in fact, the possibilities of the business are just beginning to be ap preciated. The industry has passed the fad stage and now has assumed the proportions of an important commercial factor." The Belgian hare show vt ill be an annual feature in Los Angeles, and will be held in San Francisco, Seattle, New York, Chicago, St Paul and other places. f amily Resemblance. A young gentleman took his little sister with him while caliini; the other evening at a house where he is a regu lar visitor. ine uttie girl made her- self quite at home, showing great fond ness for one of the young ladies, hug ging her heartily. "How very affectionate she is!" said the lady of the house. "Yes; so like her brother!" re- speeded the young lady, nnthinkingly. Buffalo Courier, LET US ALL LADGH. JOKES FROM THE PENS OF VA RIOUS HUMORISTS. Pleasant Incident Occurring the. World Ovr-Sy lngs that Are Ckssr fol to Old or Toung-Fuunj Salec tiaa that to Will Enjoy. But I cannot engage you as a house maid when you tell me yourself that my friend across the street discharged you for eavesdropping." "But the temptation was so great. You see, you don't know what It was I heard." "On second thought I will employ you. Run and take off your hat" New York World. Went Too Far. Jilted lover Why, why do you give me up. Marguerite? Do I not carry out your slightest wish? I would give up aiy last penny for you my last crust it bread I would run my very feet off 0 do your bidding. Marguerite That's Just it. I cannot bring myself to marry a man who Is so easily led. New York World. A Great Difference. "Jerry Pontoon, tell us something about Oliver Cromwell." "Which version, ma'am?" "I don't understand." "Magazine or history?" Too Bad. Rooster Why, what brought you to the place of solitary confinement? Hen Bad judgment Rooster How's that? Hen I roosted too low down. Expensive Economy. "Madge, we can't afford new clothes this spring." "Well, then, Albert, we must move. I don't mind wearing my old duds In a new neighborhood, but I won't stay here and wear them." Indianapolis Journal. Amenitlea of the Clnb. Mrs. A. Who on earth Is Miss Jen kins in mourning for that she perpetu ally dresses in black? Mrs. B. Her husband. Mrs. A. Why, she never had any. Mrs. B. I mean the one she has sought for all ber life and never found. New York World. The Telltale Compliment. "Dear me! I must be getting old." "What makes you think so?" "People have begun congratulating me on holding my own." Had a Fretty Good Hunch. "How did you come to pluck np enough courage to propose to Miss Frisbie, Bunting?" "Well, she suggested that I had bet ter not send her an expensive valentine this year, but save my money to go to housekeeping," confessed Bunting. Detroit Free Press. On State Street. "You say he bowed to me, Jen? Well, I don't want any of his old bows." "Then why don't you return them?" Unabaahed. Good Man I fear that you have been drinking hard of late, my man? Larry Niver a dhrop, yer riverince. Good Man But your nose is very, very red. Larry Oi big ye'r pardon, yer river ince, it's anly th' refliction from th' rid flannlls Ol wear. No Fnn for the Parse. "Did you go to the girls' college ben efit supper, major?" "Yes, little gal." "They say it was a circus, major?" "No, it wan't little gal. If it had only been a circus I could have bought a bag of rancid peanuts for a nickel, Instead of paying 50 cents for a burnt ball of popcorn." Obituary, Editor Callowman, the cigarette fiend, is dead. Publisher I can't help It Editor-But he always paid up his subscription. Publisher-Then I guess we'd better give him a puff. Boon to Be Accommodated. "Yes," said the sentimental Filipino, "there's nothing more pleasant than a sylvan retreat" "I'm glad you like the idea," an swered the general. . "We take to the woods again to-morrow."-Washineton Star. Soared. Quinn-The money Simms had In bank went up the first year. De Fonte-What happened the sec ond year? Quiun-Why, the bank went up. A Cheap Extrication. "How did you finally get rid of that man who wanted you to become a mill ionaire by letting him put you In on the ground floor of a mining scheme?" "Oh, I gave him 25 cents to buy his lunch."-Chicago Times-Herald. K4ectrical Disturbance. HardacreI reckon Zeke Grublot was surprised to find he could buy a lightning rod from the agent for J2 " Crawfoot-Why, man, he was thunderstruck. Those Dear Girls. Miss Chellus-What a lovely piece of lace that Is. Miss Amy Bell-Yes, Isn't it? Mam ma gave me that when I first came out Miss Chellus-Really? How well it has worn: Philadelphia Press. Oetend'a Idea. Ostend, take tbi3 sprinkler and wa ter the rubber plant"" rubber is waterproof." Superfluous Effort. "Here's a quarter for you, poor man, said the sympathetic old lady, "aud f hope you will stick to your resolve nevi er to be dishonest" "I will, mum," responded Wear? Wiggins. "Wot'i der use ov Bteallof when yer kin git money dls easy.'U Philadelphia Record. ' k An Innovation. Ida A bicycle suit of khaki would b Just the thing. ? May I don't see why? j; Ida It wouldn't show the mud. 'f Two Uplift era. I "What!" exclaimed the orator, "wna two things are helping mankind to gS up In the world?" "The alarm clock and the stepla der," answered the dense person Iu tb': rear of the hall. Baltimore America! A Rlaah at Hla Beard. He Miss Simpson, I'm a self-mad man, j She Yes? Well, why didn't you stud the fashion plates In regard to will kers? Chicago Record. j Had One at Home. A class was being examined in spel Ing the other day, when the teach" questioned a little girl as follows: 1 "Ethel, spell kitten." ; "K, double 1, double t, e-n," replle" Ethel. ! "Kitten has two I's then, has It?" sal the teacher. 1 "Yes, ma'am," answered Ethel, cot fldently; "ours has." i Papa In for It. t "Mamma, what would you do if tlrf big vase in the parlor should get brol en?" said Tommy. "I should whip whoever did it," sal Mrs. Banks, gazing severely at her lit tie son. I "Well, then, you'd better begin to ge up your muscle," said Tommy, "c papa's broke it." i The Agony of Fear. Benevolent Old Gent Are you n afraid you will fill a drunkard's gravt Thirsty Thingumbob Not on yer lif De fear wot haunts me dreams is dJ I'll die sober. Philadelphia Record. Knew His Products. r "He writes for the funny papers." f. "Yes; it must be a funny paper thas will print anything he wrltes." delphia Bulletin. Phil' Desperate Economics. "Joe, there's a collar and cuff tru started." f "Oh, gracious! I've been turnin mine upside down; and now I suppo I'll have to turn them inside out"4 Indianapolis Journal. A Pleasant Reckoning. "It is queer about Cousin Valeria' old admirers." j "What Is queer?" "Why, the further she gets awa from them the more numerous they a, pear to her." Shouldn't Ask Foolish Questions, j Mabel Do you believe the peace co. ference will accomplish anything, M Bohawk? Mother Don't be silly, Mabel! 11 Bohawk Is the leader of our churt; choir. New York Press. The dog Just my luck! They've gon and fenced that Hon in so's I can't gt; at him! t A Heartfelt Definition. "Say. pa. what Is an adult?" "An adult Jimmv. is a nerson wh: doesn't kick out a good pair of slion every two weeks." Two Heads on One Pair Shoulders, I "I peeped into the parlor as I can along the hall," remarked Mr. Fam.'( mqn, "and I saw quite a strange freai of nature." iTnliqf - 1 1 . . . . . 1 1 s jicuiijr i cAL-iaiiueu 3irs. r amniuu. "Edith is there with her young man." "Yes, I saw two heads on one pairs shoulders." Philadelphia Press. Arousing the Cook. Stubb I compel our cook to keep alarm clock in her room. Fenn Does the gong arouse her? oiuoo iso; put it arouses mv wti and then she goes up two flights t stairs ana raps on the cook's door. Magnified Admiration. "When would you call a man real; great?" "When he gets to be as ereat as ten-year-old nenhew thinks he ls."- Chleago Record. Marvelous Speed 01 Arctnrus. On a summer evening you may Arcturus high up in the south or souti west in June or July, and furtht' down in the west in August or Septen ber. You will know It by its red colo: That star has been flying straigt ahead ever since astronomers began t observe it at such a SDeed that h would run from New York to Cbicagf in a small fraction of a minute. To; would have to be spry to rise from yotf chair, put on your hat and overcoat an gloves and go out on the street while was crossinc the Atlantic ncpan fron New York to Liverpool. And yet If y should watch that star all your Uf' and live as long as STtethuselab, yf would not be able to see hat it move.? at alL The innrnov that It r--ii!1 nisi i in 1,000 years would be as nothia- alongside Its distance. Youth's Cot pan ion. Russia's Aaiatin Possess! na. Russia's Asiatic possessions ire thr times the size of Great Britain's, b"1 hold only 23,000,000 inhabitants. compared with Great Britain's 237,01 Annihilation Obstructed. IPMl lira flpJ k-lf i uw subjects, ,