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About The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933 | View Entire Issue (Dec. 2, 1893)
oocl River Glacier.
It's a Cold Day Vhcn We Get Left.
HOOD U1VKR, OREGON, SATURDAY. DECIPHER 2, 181)3.
Sfcod livcr Slacier.
'i i'i.imiKii itvmir hatiiiioat Mnnsirxj t
, Tlio Glacier Publishing Company.
m um mi' i ion imiicc
l.i . ,
' 'i Ih.
Grant Evans, Propr.
neiii Oak, . Hood River, Or.
Suiting mid llaii culling urntly dun.
Nulmhu linn liuaiuntuf .1.
Sina Mo ollii'iitli lint driving out
111.' Ill'llllull IX,
Armor plates f ir tint Mniiadnntk nr
muting ai i In Man' I-I.ind navy yard.
Ihcloeat Nulllii'lli lilillum! IH Slflir-
iii t'l.Min I loi u ili-iui mid yard ut ' ii-
Tin' ( 1 1 1 ir i--hh mine near Present t, A.
I , u In. It Ii.ih hull hill' lor two years, in
I'i'ii iiiiii.r. out, itnd work w ill soon
I i. Mil l.utttcll, son of the late linn
I 1 1 1 1 K . I.uiiri'll, I'niii'il state special
II,'. 'lit lor Alaska, lilt been appointed to
HI. in, I ;i IllllllT.
At I'li. iilrllo, Iilitho, mi edict Inm gone
f.'illi :n." Iicuccforl h no iiiiiri ii'il Woman
HI II h In .1 1 I It'll III, III shall he employed in
tin1 .iililii' schools hi ik teacher.
'I In- resignation of Horace W. Hying-
I'Hi, I (illcrlnr of Internal Krvi'llili' for
Hi. a i a 1 1 1 1 1 1 disiiict ol California,
li.t-. In i n accepted by Secretary 'hi linli.
H-rai I'. Mill of Oglcli, I'tllh, I him
Im u s nii'iii r.l in ten years' imprison
(i.i lil lor embezzling 5.riO,tHKI of tlic fund
ul ihi' Coinu.cicial National Hank of
Tin' ,h'mii1' urn getting rrn.lv to
nniBip ilou ii iihiii the Oregon Hoard of
1 :.;!!. i!tutloli. Itceinbcr 20 IH till' dale
Nnling of I ouliti county set for llie
A lung mill stormy w inter is predicted
hv Hie klauialh Indians of Oregon.
i 1 1 . I. ,i-i' I heir prophecy oil till! Intivc
iiii iilH of the wil l 1 1 I and other like
IhoimiK Cruse, the llelcnii millionaire
hanker, is ii vei v nick limn. 1 1 ih physi
cians have advised Ins prompt removal
In I'.iliioi inn. M r. ( 'ruse is the diseov
I'lci ul the famous I iriimluminiin mine.
Kxpi'i in ( iititn to have loiinil it short
.! hi over 1 1. 000,000 in llm v .title of tile
wilier p. mil icccntly purchased hv llie
iiiv of Taconi.t Imiiii I'. It, Wright oi
I'llilieh'lphia (or 1 ,750,000. Experts
plm'e llie value of the plant lit (7-10,000.
I'lie has ili'Vil-litleil nlnillt 8,000 acres
ui p, mIiiic an. I limber Ian. I on tlx.' Sunlit
Miirgucniit ranch near ('iipittritno, Or-
an;c 1 "'I" I V , mi. I he mm li ih ow hoi
hv K ( I'Neiil ami llie Nevada I'.ank oi
.Sin I'l.iiieifco. I'. (iiircm'H large liee
nun li a- ' lest ii eyed.
A In. Angcies dispatch says theSouth
itii t nit l 11 ii in I :.i 1 1 1 ' ml Complin) oll'ered
n iiiniihei oi tramp work for it week or
ten day ul s.t lengthening n levee to pro
tect ii.i Hick, promising $175 it day.
Si. me of them wmkeil it few hours;
dilieiH a ilny, lint nil iiit at tho end of
llie second day.
The Mokelumnc Uiver Miimifnetitrinjt
Ciiinpaiiy him pelitioned the Hoard of
Supi rviMir for permission to Hunt Iohh
(lim n the Mokeliimne river, thei'.ouipiiny
to i lean out. that river ho that loinn
Itmv he made pochihle. The upier I'orku
ol lhe Moki liiinne river hsh throujih nil
exh iiMve region of lino timber land rieb
in nijjiir pine.
Three indict incuts Imvo been found at
PrcMoti, A. I'., iijninst K. W. Kreneli,
the (le)Hised I'roliale .hldo ami County
School Supei iiileiiileiit one lor embez
zlement, one for forgery and one for
nihiiiK' ft waiiant knotting it to be
fraudulent. French ban been in jail
since his arrest in September.
Secretary of the Navy Herbert has or
dered ihe' removal of t bit following olli
U'inl of Vallejo lor oU'eiifive parlienn-'.4-i,,:
A. 1.. llatbeway. eliiul eleik Bteitiu
ciikrineeiin deparlmeiit, IfMOO a year;
A. Iluriiap, ell i ef chemist, a yeur;
C. duster, clerk, U.OllO a yenr. TIii-fo
iilaceswiil be tilled an follows: A. 0.
iiiiiilv, Oakhuid, chief clerk ; P. Mckin
ley, Oakland., t lieinift ; 1). Murpby, Val
J. I.ee Carroll, con of cx-Oovernor
Carroll of Maryland, is a noted hunter,
lie is at Tm'oniit on bis way to India to
hunt tigers and elephants. Monday Mr.
Carroll made up a party of friends, se
cured itiiides and started for the Cascade
Mountains on n goat-hunting expedition.
Tuesday tho guides quarreled between
tlienifeives, and one of them named Re
vere was shot. Carroll, who was entirely
unused to tho barbarous scenes enacted
(y the guiik'H, determined to return to
Ai',''liti1R or proimd ppaco at. tho
San KianeiHCo Midwinter Fair have been
received i:i such huge numbers that it
was necessary for the fair management
to make application to the Park Com
missioners for sixty additional acres of
(Tionnd. which was granieu tneni. iiie
r . . . ....
iviinsition e rounds now cover a snaco of
ian.ii-.res. It has also been decided to
build an annex to tho manufacture' and I
liberal arts building. 1 his annex will
.n in tho rear of tho building, and wi'l ,
bo seventy-live feet in depth, and will
run the entire length of the main build-
Artificial teeth lire made of paper.
('(Miking by electricity grows in favor
The world's hop crop is over 11,(100,000
Poiirthousaud Kiiglinh clergymen want
The wealth of Kiigland is out minted at
There are about '10,000 slum and leather
llrtiiH in this country.
South Africa has lots of sheep, but
only one woolen mill.
American giniu nlevators are being in
troduced in lenniiiiy.
Oiie-tlijnl of the telegraph operators
in Kughtnd are women.
Half the ocean ships of the world are
ow ned by ( ireat lirilitin.
The cotton in ills of .In pan giveeinplov
inent to r.'.IHH) operatives.
The entire stock of irnld In the world
is less than (K.IHXI, 000,1100.
'lhe length of all the canals of the
moi Id is nearly '..'0,000 miles.
In PitrH, Purlin and Vienna there are
butchers who sell holHellesh,
There is a tunnel K00 feet long on
one of the .Mexican inilroads.
Three thousand locomotives arc owned
by the Pennsylvania railroad.
The lirsl cotton mill in this country is
said to have been at Peverlv, Mass.
There are r00,000,000 of I'.ngli-h ca
itnl invested in American railroads.
Postoii ms , nil) 17.020 new buildings
in the past decade lit a cost of 1 HI.OO.I,
4V.t. ( n an averag" a locomotive engineer
travel- ','0,000 miles in the course of a
The mint of Philadelphia hns a collec
tion of over H,00() coins of dillerent na
tions. The cost of an ironclad is nliout f-100 a
ton. This includes guns and all equip
ments. 'lhe net private indebtednes of the
American people amounts to 10,700,-
The llrsl rocking chair was mnde on
the llrewster fit'ii:. Kingston, Mass., by
a fai in baud in 17NI).
Fitiures show that the total rsilwsv
mileiiL'e of the country on June 30, IHOIl,
was 171 M'.l.h'l miles.
The biggest quill toothpick mill is in
Paris. Norway leads in the manufact
ure of wooden tisitbpicks.
Nickel of the best ijualitv is now sell
imr at f0 cents and line silver at nliout
$11 per avoirdupois pound.
The prospect now is that more than
1,000,000 tons of sugar will be made in
Cuba during the season of 8!M.
lindoners drink H.KOO.OOO gallons of
milk yearly, or little more iIihii two gal
lons for each man, woman and child.
The making of lucifer matches is a
State monopoly in France, Spain, Portu
gal, Italy, ( ireece, Koitmiiuia and Servia.
In the matter of well-kept country
roads it is staled that New .Jersey leads,
and that Southern New Fngland follows.
Last year New York citv paid for its
school bill H.000.000, for its amusement
bill $7,000,000 and for its drink bill J00,
000,000. A check for X5,:i:;.'t.(r0 on the P.unk of
Fngland in payment for the Kimberly
diamond mines is said to be thu largest
In everv mile of railroad there are
seven feet and four inches not covered
by the rails the space left between them
On the Mex'cnn pension roll there are
names of 15,215 survivors and 7. '2X'2 wid
ows, and something over 11,000 cases were
pending at latest reports.
Pennsylvania furnished 00,000.000 of
the 170,000,000 tons of coal mined in
this country this vear. Illinois was sec
ond, with 18,000,000 tons.
In I!rn7.il it is not rustouinrv for ser
vants to reside in llieiremployer's house.
They come to work early in the morning
and return home in tho evening.
Mrs. Levi P.Morton has leased the
house formerly occupied by Senator
.tones of Nevada in order to supervise
the complete education of her daughters.
F.verett Chauncey Rumpus of Quincr,
Mass., a member of the present freshman
class of Harvard, is completely blind,
hut. intends to take the full course for
the degree of bachelor of arts.
Now that Marshal McMahon is dead,
France has only one living citizen who
has been Pre-ident, and that is Carnot,
the present occupant of that high oflice.
Thiers died in 1877 and CJrovy two years
Russian women and Japanese men are
pronounced by those competent to judue
the best of the world's workers with the
needle, as shown in tho embroidery ex
hibits in Chicago.
The Prince of Wales is very fond of
wearing old clothes, probably because
ho doesn't have to.
Gardening was Gounod's pet hobby,
and almost to the last day of his life be
was able to busy himself among his
roses and geraniums. But mentally the
composer was a wreck long before death
Bisliop do Goesbriand of St. Albnns,
Vt., at the ace of 77 is the oldest Bishop
in the United States. Ho has been a
priest fifty-seven years, and lately cele
brated the fortieth anniversary of his
elevation to the Bishopric.
Governor Feter Tnrney of Tennessee.
although 70 years old, is still fond of
hunting fox ond deer, and lias a pack of
hound? at his home (called "Wolfe's
Craig ") in the southeastern part of the
State. He follows the hounds on horseback.
CliinihH of (.old Quart.
Foil ml in Colorado.
TKRRII1LK DROUTH IN (JKORfilA.
Colorado Minor Decllun to Acrept
Work at a (ireat I y Red tired
Rate The A nurcli 1st s.
The associated bunks of New York
have ij'.HI.lHIO.OOO in gold.
A short cotton crop and dry weather
are reported from Texas.
The Republicans of St. Ijuis carried
the Scliisil Hoard election.
Baltimore trolley cars must be
vided with a life-saving fender.
Over .'!00 lynchings have, taken place
in the South during the present year.
Big chunks, of quartz full of gold have
I.e. 'ii struck on a claim at Cripple ('reek,
Terrible drought bus dried up wells
and springs in Georgia's mountain dis
tricts. Philadelphia has got the liberty bell
back from Chicago, and business has
A movement has been started to es
tablish a steamship line between Gal
veston and Tainpico.
Failure to answer a New York jury
not icii or exnlnin his delinoupneies imav
cost Carl Scliurz $100.
The Chicago Presbvlery has deixised
and suspended Rev. Totberoh from the
ministry of lhe church.
The Iiuisiana taxpayers are requested
to pay their taxes at once and save the
pii lil ic schisils from closing.
There is a general movement through
out the country toward hiuher injurandi
rates on larm-propwrty risks.
The first Application of a woman to be
a notary politic in .New Hampshire lias
liecii refused by the Governor.
Many Indiana pensioners learn thev
have lieen dropped from the list on pre
senting their vouchers at Indianapolis.
It is said that the attorneys for Pren
lergust, the assassin of Mayor Harrison,
will try for a change of venuo from Chi
Four hundred persons have Ikpii ar
rested in West Virginia within ten days
for nioonshing and illicit retailing of
A H.tltiinore and Ohio train recently
niadu the run from Akron to Chicago, a
listanee of V2 miles, in eight hours and
'the Georgia House of Helegates has
voted down a proposition to increase the
pav of the .Judges of tho Superior Court
from 2,000 to $2,500.
From January to Octolvr of this vear
78,4;t4 aliens arrived as cabin passengers
in this country, making an incroaso of
;!2,741 over last year's arrivals.
A Oenver dispatch savs that " the
union miners are standing out lor their
old wages and refuse to accept an oiler
of $2 25 for eight hours' work."
The United States Histrict Court fined
the St. Iiuis and Mississippi Uiver
Packet Company $1,000 for carrying gas
oline on a passenger steamboat.
The great viaduct of the Wilkesbarre
and Eastern railroad over Panther creek
has been completed. It is more than
l,(i00 feet long and KilJ feet high.
Thev lynched a white man down in
Virginia tho other day for assaulting a
negro girl. The color line is fast giving
wav belore one with a nooso in the end
Over 50,000 Russian Jews have landed
at the port of New oik in the ten
months of this year according to the of
licial report of the Commissioner of Im
migration. Bridgeport's (Conn.) coffee house, es
tablished as a result of temperance agi
tation, earned 25 per cent dividend its
first year. In that time 180,000 meals
have been furnished.
The Javanese people, who formed such
a center of interest in the World's Fair,
have departed for their native land and
each man takes with him a trunk, a
sewing machine and a gun.
Colorado declared for female suffrage
by a majority of about 4.000. The min
ers are sain id nave voted lor it to en
courage immigration of strong-minded
women from Aew hnglaiut.
A railroad is to be built to the summit
of Whiieface Mountain in the Adiron-
lacks, the height of which is 5,000 feet.
The road w ill be thirteen miles long, and
will begin work noxt spring.
At the children's building in the
World's Fair, where babies were cared
for and checks given to their parents to
insure safe redelivery, only one baby out
of 10,000 remained uncalled for.
But very little money ia being loaned
in Kansas, and farmers are finding it
hard to secure renewals of their loans,
which are becoming due. The cause as
signed by the loan companies is the fear
of hostile Populist legislation.
Louis 1'. Menage, whose extradition
has been asked from Guatemala, was
President of the Northwestern Guaran
tee Loan Company of Minneapolis,
Minn., which failed last Mav. Menage
made away with at least $3,000,000 be
longing to the concern and its clients.
The bodies of Alexander McClelland
and his son Oscar, who disappeared from
Centralia, III., in 1881. have been dis
covered in a pond, where they were
buried and staked down. A brother of
the deceased senior McClelland is sus
pected of committing the crimes. The
discovery has created great excitement
FttOM WASHINGTON CITY.
The Commissioner of the general land
(illicit has ordered Inspector Cannichael
to investigate the nppraisememit of lots
in the townsiteof Port Angeles, Wash.
Many occupants have protested that the
appraisement is unequal.
Seervtsry Herbert is quoted as author
ity for the statement that there will be
mi immediate change in tho command of
tin! naval forces at Rio, which devolved
upon Cantain Picking of the Charleston
when Admiral Stanton was recalled.
Representative Hermann having made
sal isiaelory showing to the department
mai ine seiners in the vicinity of Ivi
son in Lane county, Or., were too much
inconvenienced to wait until July next
for new mail contract to deliver their
mails, an order has Isien issued that pro
posals be invited at once for mail service,
to commence January 1 next.
Commissioner Lamoreaux of the gen
eral land ollice has decided in favor of
the Great Falls Water Power and Town
site Company tho case which involved
Mm whole town of Great halls, Mont.
'1 he deci-ioii is that the townsitu com
pany is an innocent purchaser and under
the act of March A, 181)1, could not be
disturbed in its jioisession of tho prop
erty. Lieutenant-Colonel Charles R. Green
leaf, llipnty Surgeon of the United
Stales army, lias been relieved from duty
in the War Department and ordered to
assume charge of the medical supply de
partment in San Francisco, relieving
Lieutenant-Colonel Joseph P. Wright,
Heputv Surgeon-General, who will as
sume charge of the medical supply de
partment in St. Ixiuis.
The annual reportof Tillman, Register
of the Treasury, shows that in Octo!or,
18112, the value of registered bonds which
were supposed to lie held by persons of
foreign nationality amounted to about
$18,800,000. of which only $4,8.30,300 ap
jH'Bied upon the foreign ledgers. ' It is
evident," says the report, " that a large
projiortioii of the registered bonds owned
abroad are controlled by agents residit -n
There is mu :h complaint among ex
hibitors over the dehy in awarding
World's Fair medals. As many of the
exhibitors expect to make the most of
their medals in an advertising way, thev
complain that tho great delay will rob
them of much ol the commercial advan
tage which they expected to reap in re
turn for the heavy expenso involved in
making t'ie World's Fair exhibit. The
design by St. Gaudcns for official medals
is here, hut the contracts for manufact
uring the medals has not yet Iwen award
ed, and it is still even uncertain whether
the work may not be done by the United
States mint. The plan of the Treasury
officials contemplates medals of elegant
w orkmanship that would require four or
live months, as it would necessitate
stamping some of them 400 or 500 times,
and it does not seem probable the work
will lie completed before next summer.
The blame is laid to the Committee of
Awards or to Designer St. Gaudens for
not furnishing the designs earlier.
Secretary Carlisle has received from
tho Commissioner of Immigration at
San Francisco a reK)rt, accompanied by
sworn testimony, nliout the landing in
San Francisco of twelve Russian con
victs, who escaped from confinement and
were picked up by passing vessels and
brought to this country. The men are
now under arrest in San Francisco, and
the question that complicates the situa
tion is w hat to do with them. While the
greatest secrecy is maintained at the de
partment atiout the contents of the offi
cial report, it is believed five Russians
were political prisoners, in which case it
is said our immigration laws do not in
terfere to debar them from landing. At
the same time the Rupsian Minister,
Prince Cantacnr.ene, has interested him
self in having them turned over to the
Russian authorities. The matter has
assumed such an important phase that
Secretary Carlisle has taken it into his
own bands and will confer with Secre
tary Grcsham on the fate of the Rus
sians. Sumner I. Kimball, general superin
tendent of the life-saving service, in his
annual report to Secretary Carlisle states
that at the close of the last fiscal year
the establishment embraced 244 stations.
The number of disasters to documented
vessels w ithin the tield of the operations
of the service during the year was 427.
There w ere on board these vessels 3,56o
persons, of whom twenty-three were lost.
The estimated value of the vessels in
cluded in tho disasters was $6,414,075,
and that of their cargoes $ 1,684.000. Of
this amount $6, 442. 605 was saved and
$1,055,570 lost. The number of vessels
totally lost was eight. The cost of the
maintenance of the service during the
year was $1,231,893.45. The general su
perintendent states that the fears ex
pressed in former reports of a threatened
decadence of the service, excited by the
frequent resignations of many of the
best snrfmen on account of the" meager
ness of their pay, have been dispelled
by the recent increase granted by Con
gress. Hiram Hitchcock, President of the
Maritime Canal Company of Nicaragua,
has submitted to the Secretary of the
Interior the annual report of the com
pany, which wss not due until Decem
ber 1, but sent it at the request of the
Secretary, who desired to use some of
the data in his annual report. President
Hitchcock says that since the appoint
ment of a receiver for the Canal Con
struction Company little work has been
done. The Secretary was referred to the
last report as to the present condition of
work. Since organization $1,055,811 has
been paid into the treasury, all for stock
subscribed for at par except 48,871,
which came from other sources. There
was paid out forconstruction and admin
istrat ion expenses 830,788 in cash and
31.000 shares of stock, par value, which
are worth $3,190,000. The company is
obligated for $ 6.355,000 of its first-mortgage
bonds. It has issued 180.000 shares
of stock, par value $18,000,000, in pay
ment of concessionary rights, privileges,
franchises and other property.
A Great Mexican Revolutionary
Leader Put in Prison.
TWO AMERICANS IN TROUBLE.
Leaders of the Brazilian Insurrec
tion Have Decided to Hoist
the Imperial Flair.
Evictions are agitating Ireland again.
There is a "craze" in France for am
Russian statesmen plan a State mo
nopoly of tobacco.
The Manchester (England) ship canal
is practically complete.
The mind of M. Herz, the Panama ca
nal intriguer, is failing.
The leading scientists in Germany are
puzzled over a blue man.
English miners refuse to agree to pro
posals to settle the strike.
An English syndicate wants to start a
big bank at Havana, Cuba.
A new Ministry has been formed in
Greece with Tricoupis as Premier.
President Carnot of France has liegun
a cruHade against the sulphur match.
Levi P. Morton has placed his two
daughters in a convent at Tours, France.
The Bank of Spain has subscrilied
5o.0O0 to carry on the fight against the
French scientists have devised an arti
ficial larynx, which is claimed to enable
the dumb to speak.
Germany means to raise increased rev
enue from tobacco and bourse transac
tions. It is becoming more costly to main
tain the peace of Europe than to carry
n a dcBiruciive war.
A British syndicate is reported to lie
ready to advance money to gain control
of the Nicaragua canal.
The famous Chinese giant, Chang, died
at Bournemouth, England, November 5.
He stood eight feet high.
Milan police recently nabbed sixtv
three Anarchists at one meeting and
great quantities of documents.
Miss Rye, the English philanthropist,
has introduced 4,000 English pauper
children into Canadian homes.
The citizens of Sebastopol have placed
wreaths upon the tombs of the trench
soldiers who fell in the Crimean war.
The Brazilian government has pur
chased nine torpedo boats in Europe
four in England and five in Germany.
The royal opera house of Munich has
offered a prize of 8,000 marks or a new
German opera by a German or an Aus
trian. There is talk that European powers
will view with displeasure the eftort of
Spain to extend her territory in North
Empress Eugenie has declared her in
tention to spend the whole winter at her
villa of the Cap, near Mentone, on the
Lord Colin Campbell has turned up in
Bombay as a counselor employed to de
fend twenty-nine Mohammedans impli
cated in the great riots.
Honduras lias apologized for firing on
the American mail steamer Costa Rica.
The apology is entirely satisfactory to
the United States government.
Having partly abolished gambling
among army officers, Kaiser William
now plans legislation against betticg on
horses and public card-playing.
The navigation of the Dead Sea is the
latest step in Oriental progress. The
Sultan has sent two sailing boats there,
one for freight and one for passengers.
Paris advices assert with great posi
tiveness that an assured result of the
visit of the Russian fleet will be the re
election of President Carnot next year.
Prof. Tyndall has recently returned to
his English home from seveial months'
sojourn in Switzerland, by which his
health is said to have been greatly bene
fited. Letters from Acra on the West African
gold coast say that the King of Asbantee
was stoned to death recently by insur
gents in the streets of Coomassie, his
Tho New York Times' London special
says: The European backers of Brazil
ian insurgents are pouring out gold by
the millions in the hope that Admiral de
Mello may overthrow the Republic.
The London Times learns through a
private channel that the leaders of the
Brazilian insurrection held a conference,
at which it was decided to hoist the im
perial flag and direct their efforts toward
a restoration of the monarchy.
The smock frock, which from tiue im
memorial down to twenty years aso was
universal in the costume of the British
workingman, has almost entirely disap
peared, and in France a similar fate has
overtaken the traditional blue blouse.
The London County Council has bought
forty-one acres of Hilly Fields, Brock
ley, as a park for Southeast London.
The Council wishes to buy four acres
more, but must raise $14,000 more before
it can do so. The whole cost of the land
will be $215,000.
The Pope will hold a consistory in
February, when several Cardinals will
be created. The question of conferring
the purple on Archbishop Ireland has
been raised, but the Pope seems to have
abandoned that idea, being afraid of of
fending the Jesuits, who are still very
powerful, and who, it is known, have op
posed Archbishop Ireland. Consequently
no American Cardinal will be designated
at the next eongiitory.
fill Dfinerlptlnn of n Intorruptnrl Wed
deereilitur Ml jonsoim btf brother gf.t
marled on toosd.-t nitit over at his gurl
bouse an pa & ma went 2 the wedin an tide
me. Ml an mo wos 3 get hi-r al nitoan hud
a grate time, al the pirple went up stairs a
w. the presunts wat won standin on the
tables, thay was fine. 1 ov the pnunfs
was a toilet set. a toilet set Is a wash bnin
an a bowl an things like that, all ov the
toilet set wos not on tho table, bil node
ware It wos hided an lie got the other part
cut an put it on the table 2. Mis brothers
url wasorful mad.
just b 4 tho wedin com? ncid bil sed 2 me,
georgie, say nothin, but things isal fixed
an we r pono 2 liaiv fun.
tiny marched down stairs with the rnin
Istur a head an Mis brother an bis purl
blind, she bad tvito moskito net on her
bid an he had on a vest with al the front
cut out so that ii cooil see bis shirt, he
luked gud an so did she.
a nothcr man wot dident hniv no front In
bis vest set down 2 pla the pianer wen thay
corned along an be banged an bunded on
tho keys, but tho pianer woodent maik no
evri 1 Iuked supriwd an the ministnrnn
the gurl wot was gone 2 b married an bils
brother stud out in tho ball waitin 4 the
march 2 commence, but It dident com
menceso thay come ahead without anl
bil sed 2 me, low like, gorgie, i put a bed
slat acrost the strings 1q the pianncr so it
bil had a lonz peace ov wire stickin out
on the side ov tie doorway so wen the bride
corned alonij it caught in 2 her vale an
pultxl it off. she wos jsst orfel mad, but
she dident no wat niaht her vnle come oft.
then they stud up in the front part or
the room an commencid 2 git married.
the minister sed, du u taik this lawfulll
weddin woman 2 b yure wife. 2 luve her an
a boy, in helth an death.
bils brother kinder chocked an his neck
got red an his shirt bosom creaked an he
clenched his fist on ho opened his mouth
an dident say nothin, so he shutitagane
an opened it an sed yes. i wos rele sorri
4 him, coss tho way he went i thote he wos
gone 2 haiv a spasm.
then tbe ministur sed, du u taik this
man 2 live in helth an honor in deth 2 b
yure lawfulli wedf.in husMnd, an du u
sware In tbe presence of tLc court that the
afydavit Is true 2 yure nowkdge, an wil u
b true 2 him in all your vous.
the gurl looked strait at the ministur,
au her faic kep gettin witer al the time an
she wos picking leaves off her dress. Wen
the ministur got duntalkin she Iuked down
at the floor an sed yes so low that no 1 cood
then bil went out in the hall an listened
2 the marriage thro the keyhole.
then the minister sed, if thay Is anibodl
here wat noso of ani reason wy this mar
riage should not go let him spit it out or 4
evir bold his tong.
tbe mic.tur stopped an 4 abotcahalf
minit no 1 sed ani thing, but thay al Iuked
a round the room at each other an bils
brother Iuked orful uncomfortable.
then bil shoved open tbe door an yelled
in with a voico liko a old man.
i demand that this marrige stop.
u never seed such a time in al yure life
like thay wos thair. al the women screamed
an the gurl wat was gone 2 b marrid fainted,
she nocked over a high pianner lamp an it
set fire 2 sum papir roses.
then evri 1 yellid fire an bi an bl the en
gines cum. tho minister run out in 2 the
street with som ov tho roses wat was on
fire an they plade tho hose on him. bils
brother wanted 2 kill thu man who had sed
the weddin must stop, bil jounson was
afraid to go home aftir.
p. s. the weddin is put off. gorgie.
New York Mercury.
A Bad Break.
Parson Whangdoodle Baxter of the
Thompson Street Blue Light tabernacle
made a pastoral call at the flat of Sam
Jobusing, the object of the visit being to
remonstrate with Jobnsing for eating pea
nuts during divine worship. Sam heard
his pastor's voice and hid behind a curtain,
while Mrs. .lohnsing received the pastor
and assured him that Sara had gone up tbe
Hudson on an excursion. Unfortunately
tbe curtain did not quite reach the floor,
and some large, generous feet protruded.
"So, you says dat Sam has done gone off
on a skurshon?" queried the dusky cleric.
"Yes, parson, and he specs ter be gone all
day," replied Mrs. Johnsing.
"Well, be so kind and tell Sam when he
gits back dat de nex' time he goes on a
skurshun he had better take his feet erlong
wid him," at the same time prodding Sam's
feet with his cane until he roared. Texas
Tramp I'd like to do something to pay
fer all this, but I'm a cripple, mum.
Housekeeper You don't look it. What's
Tramp Writer's cramp, mum. I've been
keepin a list of all th' people wot offered
me work, mum. New York Weekly.
A Rambunctious Pet.
Miss Citygirl (before the accident) Look,
Mamie. That must be a pet lamb. See
how it Is frisking to meet us. It doesn't
seem at all afraid. Harper's Bazar.
Which Is a Reflection.
Jones (to intoxicated friend) Good heav
ens, man, here's your wife! Let's turn
His Friend No (hie). She'll never she
us. She's looking at her reflection in the
window to she ii her hat's (bio) on straight.