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About Medford mail tribune. (Medford, Or.) 1909-1989 | View Entire Issue (May 15, 1961)
10 A MONDAY. HAY IS, 19BI MEDFORD MAIL TRIBUNE. MEDFORD. OREGON Family Council Bailor Notei lb. family Coun cil conslita of a Judge, a peychla trUt, laro clergymen, aewepapor eeltor, a women'e editor and tw wrltera lack artlolo U a ummarjr of aa ' attual cato history The Coancll report on problems thai have been dealt with by responsible eg ooelee and couneelore. - ; Aaron F. - They omitted me from the guest-list and I'm hurt. Bessie S. - He never showed nip at previous family affairs. Aaron F. - Even though I had full intentions of attend ing two recent celebrations in our family, things-came up at the last minute which forced me to absent myself. Now I learn that my sister's son was married two weeks ago at sumptuous hotel, and I wasn't even invited. This hurts me. I'm still close member of the family Whether I show up or not at the parties, I usually send a gift. I'm in the theatrical busi ness where "anything' can happen, and I can't ever be sure of going through with appointments made in ad' vance. . ' o ' Bessie S. - The family of my son's bride is not wealthy, Her father is a hard-working grocer. They were paying $60 a couple for the guests at the wedding. And they asked us to limit our invitations to 20 couples. Actually there were about 80 couples we felt we wanted or ought to invite, and trimming the list was torture, Aaron Is in the habit of ac cepting all invitations and never showing : up. Just month before to wedding, he made us pay for two empty places at our Stiver Anniver sary banquet. Tms time we asked someone wa were sure of. The Ceuncilt Has there ever been an elaborate and formal family wing-ding where some one isn't sore? Those are the natural occasions for relatives . with axes to grind to bring them tr a sharp point and settle them. The axe, here, teems to be Aaron's. The etiquette books ' not withstanding, there art no musts about wedding invita tions. They need not be bound by family relationships ex clusively. When choices must be made, a close friend who baa been a mainstay through ups and downs can be sub stituted for a blood relative who hasn't the least idea who's marrying whom! If Aaron is really the fond uncle he protests he is, he won't make this omission the basis for a family feud. In stead, he will try to see the problem Bessie had and ac cept her reasoning. Evidently she's not the only member of the family Aaron antagonized by. saying, "Yes, yes," and then not appearing. Worse. Aaron probably doesn't even apologize. And still worse, he aends a gift "usually" but not always, after expensive places ara reserved for him. A con frontation with previously of fended relatives might not have been pleasant at this wedding. , There'll be other parties and we hope, ' through Bessie's good offices and Aaron's good humor, he's returned to the "live prospect" list. His ex cuses may seem lame. They may be interpreted as mask ing a lack of interest or de sire to meet the folks. But. despite all the "events" a the atre man attends, we'll wager he welcomes a ohance to swap reminiscences with great- aunt Hattie and see how little Bert ram turned out. However, Aaron must be less casual about skipping a celebration. And Bessie must acknowledge that her brother reauy noes lead an unpre dictable life, and excuse an absence for which he is genu Inely contrite. In this instance, besides being contrite, Aaron might be "big" enough to send the newlyweds present even though he was involuntarily absent. . 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