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About Medford mail tribune. (Medford, Or.) 1909-1989 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 31, 1960)
MEDFORD MAIL TRIBUNE. MEDFORD, ORB. Family GRAY'S FURNITURE PROVES "THERE IS A SANTA Council 12 A T ""SI Editor'! Notel The ramlly Coun cil conilfti of a Judge, a peychla. trlst, three cleriymen. a newspaper dltor, a women'a editor and tw writer! Each article U t. summary af an actual case history The . Council reports on prohlema that have been dealt with by responsible agencies ana counselors. ' Herbert R. - We should tick It out for the children'i take. , ' Mona R. - There's no love left, so it s not a good home Herbert R. - I admit my marriage holds 'no attraction lor me. Mona and I married right after the war, 14 years ago. We hardly knew each other. Just wanted to settle down. Now we have two kids, a girl of 13 and a boy who's 10. And I'm just the guy who pays the bills. Mona's an ice berg to me and she has the kids treating me like a jerk But I believe in sticking to a bargain, even a bad one. O.K., we have nothing in com mon. We can't even agree on -where .to take a' walk! She wants the shop windows, I , . U !. n , always comes back alone. Even so, there are the chil dren. For their sake, Mona should keep this 'home to gether. It's better for them to have a father around, even if they don't appreciate me Maybe we can get some help to find some good in . each . other and make this miserable life more bearable. Mona R. - Our marriage was a terrible mistake. Now It's just an empty shell. This is no life for any of us and it certainly isn't a happy home for the children. I try to be civil to Herbert in front of the children. But when we're alone there's either complete silence or an gry, hateful words. And we're alone ' a lot because our friends are tired of acting like umpires between us when we argue. ... At first I thought we could stake a go of it, even though we couldn't see eye-to-eye on anything from house furnish ings to cheeses. We kept busy fixing up a home, caring for the baby. Thenftve moved and the second one cam along. But after a while we had to take a ftod look at each oth er, Then I. knew I had mar ried a narrow-minded bore. And I realized he had no feel ing for me. , . Why keep up the farce? Maybe we can each find our real male yet. Meanwhile the children should not be the excuse for chaining the wrong people together. Tht Council) Since the reason for discord and the imminent separation of the E.'s is incompatibility rather than a "third party," we're in clined to agree with Herbert's proposal that they stick it out and seek counseling. Staying together "for the children's sake" often, by dint of sincere effort, can lead to ataying together for many Jther reasons. Surely there was some spark of friendship between Herbert and Mona which led them intoflliarriage. A counselor might help them think back to the days when each pledged to lead the other to a happier life. Despite the clinkers and ashes, there may be a chance of re-igniting that spark. It sounds like an uphill job all the way, It will require, as Dr. Paul Popenoe counsels all husband and wives, not going 50-50 but going 100-100 to achieve a satisfactory mar riage! But think of the prize! A ISth and 20th wedding anniversary may loom on the immediate horizon instead of a doubtful first one with a new mate. Fourteen years in Herbert's and Mona's lives will be rescued from the ash heap. Adolescent children will have the emotional support of a united family, headed by a father and mother who have discovered the good qualities in each other and have ac cepted the quirks as jajirt of the "for better or for worse" deal. For Mona to consider separ ation and divorce, without aeeklng ways to repair her marriage, indicates that she doesn't know her own powers for changing her relationship I with Herbert for the belter. Also, that she doesn't realize j how tragic and serious a step I divorce often is. Recently a judge suggested Hint the prin cipals to a divorce wear black because it is a "sort of fu neral." Moribund as this marriage seems, Herbert and Mona should be able to revive it, both for the children's sake and - as they may well find years hence - for their own. (Copyright 1860. Central Features Corp.) Older office workffs art as productive as younger ones, according to a Labor Depart ment report. ;;MT ; 4 -A . l i II I MM 11 III a sa a &::: pga a 4 i a ; a J . receive $50 CHECK ;v.: ''-.Reg-W. fSf " I from' Us to spend af. Gray's ( $250'Cl ' VT J VrT- 7 CnS Or for Toys at- . VALUE T1 7 MOO R E'S ' v-L. latching Club Chair or Platform Rocker plus '" in FREE TOYS or Christmas Gifts teTV vs Buy 5ora and As 11 '!8'''Kik-.. ' j i Chair (or rocker)' ' ' t s v r . A Shown Above - - f1 p e: '7T n., If receive S50 CHECK Mffi$S ' : V'1 from Us to spend at Gray's-- f :$2?0'l : X-5 Or for Toys at -- V VAIUI M0 ' : ;:: MOORE'S ItSi' pi T f'VYX ifjr,- Si I Delivery ,V I ,. 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