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About Medford mail tribune. (Medford, Or.) 1909-1989 | View Entire Issue (May 18, 1958)
t v:.v. &jm&J&9 yjy TLX by Dick Hyman Plymouth, Mass.: Epitaph on tombstone in Old Hill Cemetery reads, , "If I was so soon to be done for, Why was I ever begun for?" Natchez. Miss.: Old law says it is illegal for elephants to drink beer. Graham, N. C: Register of Deeds received a year-old marriage license in the mail with a note: "I'm sorry to have to send this paper back to you, but I have been stood up." Mt. Clemens, Mich.: When police asked Melvin Reno why he was driving his car on the sidewalk, he muttered: "I'm too drunk to be on the street." i Kansas City, Mo.: Help-wanted ad in Kansas City . Star: "Wanted healthy, rugged girl weighing over . 300 pounds to be sawed in half by upcoming prestidigitator; have good act, but present partner is thin and sawing-in-half routine too short." . Waukesha, Wis.: Woman won a divorce from her husband because he made her nervous getting up at five o'clock every morning to scrub the floors and do the ironing. Baltimore, Md.: Frederick Steeg, 24, got a divorce on grounds of desertion after he read the note left behind by his wife. The note read: "Dear Freddie . . . Don't be so good to your next wife." Seattle, Wash.: The judge suspended sentence on Ben Trigg on condition that the next time he "feels a drunk coming on," he chain himself securely to a tree. Boston, Mass.: It is illegal for any citizen to take a bath unless he has a written prescription from a doctor. Trenton, N. J.: The road sign of a combination beanery and gas station near here says, "Eat here and get gas." Lawrence, Mass.: Found in the want ads: "For Sale, my husband's 50 puppies, $25. Telephone 34744. If a man answers, please hang up." Enosburg, Vt.: Epitaph of Anna Hopewell reads: "Here lies the body of our Anna, Done to death by a banana. It wasn't the fruit that laid her low, . But the skin of the thing that made her go." 17 T7 71 'child psychiatrist ' CHIU'V & C '. PSYCHIATRIST P tav lev aphis mi milter rain yourplflfrts mi fel&i ! Look at the leaves for danger signs Then control both aphis and mildew in jane opera tion with the scientifically right spray combination. OF NEW SHOOTS oLEA'pOR cwTO'Wf SHELTER FROIA APHIS suck young growth; harden buds, distort leaves, stunt growth.. IS0T0X Garden Spray which contains Lindane, Malathion and DDD, controls aphis, red spider and a wide variety of other garden insects. 0 D D D D 0 D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D D 0 D D D D D D California Spray-Chemical Corp . , THEV ALSO FEED ON TENDER AXILLARY BUDS BETWEEN LEAF AND STEM I GRAYISH PATCHES APPEAR ON YOUNG ROSE LEAVES IN EARLV SPRING EARLY DISEASE SPORES WEAKENED THISgUD-IT MAY NEVER OPEN it WIND AND WATERING SCATTER MILOCW-MAV INFECT REST OF GARDEN BY MO-SUMMIK MILDEW weakens buds, grays leaves. ORTHORIX Spray, a fungicide (containing calcium polysulfide), con trols powdery mildew and several other plant diseases, helps keep new , growth healthy. Make your hose do the work. The ORTHO Spray-Ette, attached to your garden hose, will mix and apply ISOTOX and ORTHORIX Sprays in correct dilutions. Makes spraying as easy as 7J waterine. l$OTO0 irSssH T.H.'S REG. U.S. PAT. OFF.: ISOTO. ORTHORIX Richmond. Calif., Washington, D.C.. Family Weekly, May 18, 1958
