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About Hermiston herald. (Hermiston, Or.) 1994-current | View Entire Issue (April 18, 2015)
OPINION A4 HERMISTONHERALD.COM SATURDAY, APRIL 18, 2015 EDITORIAL • COMMENTARY • LETTERS HermistonHerald VOLUME 109 ɿ NUMBER 25 -(66,&$.(//(5 6($1+$57 6$0%$5%(( JEANNE JEWETT EDITOR MNHOOHU#KHUPLVWRQKHUDOGFRP 541-564-4533 REPORTER smhart@hermistonherald.com 541-564-4534 SPORTS REPORTER sbarbee@hermistonherald.com 541-564-4542 MULTI-MEDIA CONSULTANT jjewett@hermistonherald.com 541-564-4531 .,0/$3/$17 OFFICE COORDINATOR NODSODQW#KHUPLVWRQKHUDOGFRP 541-564-4530 To contact the Hermiston Herald for news, advertising or subscription information: • call 541-567-6457 • e-mail info@hermistonherald.com • VWRSE\RXURI¿FHVDW(0DLQ6W • visit us online at: www.hermistonherald.com ANNUAL SUBSCRIPTION RATES 'HOLYHUHGE\FDUULHUDQGPDLO:HGQHVGD\VDQG6DWXUGD\V ,QVLGH8PDWLOOD0RUURZFRXQWLHV ......................................................................................... $42.65 2XWVLGH8PDWLOOD0RUURZFRXQWLHV ...................................................................................... $53.90 7KH+HUPLVWRQ+HUDOG8636,661LVSXEOLVKHGWZLFHZHHNO\DW+HUPLVWRQ +HUDOG(0DLQ6W+HUPLVWRQ25)$;3HULRGLFDO SRVWDJHSDLGDW+HUPLVWRQ253RVWPDVWHUVHQGDGGUHVVFKDQJHVWR+HUPLVWRQ+HUDOG (0DLQ6W+HUPLVWRQ25 3ULQWHGRQ recycled $PHPEHURIWKH(20HGLD*URXS&RS\ULJKW newsprint Mind your own biscuits — Some simple solutions up to a point M L ast year I wanted to smack myself for missing the chance to write about the Kacey Musgraves country song “Follow Your Arrow.” Luckily, Musgraves has now released the similarly themed “(Mind Your Own) Biscuits.” Both the former (about the futility of changing to please others) and the latter (about the futility of trying to judge/change others) follow in the tradition of crowd-pleasers such as “Mind Your Own Business” (Hank Williams, Sr.), “Family Tradition” (Hank Williams, Jr.), “Long-Haired Country Boy” (Charlie Daniels) and “Garden Party” (Rick Nelson). All of these songs have a point to make, but our disdain for prudes and busybodies can tempt us to give the points too broad an application. Although some songwriters tend to pander to the “rowdiness is next to godliness” set, please think of this column as a corollary rather than a rebuttal. Following your arrow/ dream/urges is a bedrock part of America, but the principles espoused in the aforementioned songs cannot be treated as absolutes. If your “thang” happens to be running the state’s biggest meth lab or setting a record for drugging and raping coeds or shooting unarmed suspects in the back, obviously there is a problem. True, countless personal choices have absolutely no impact on anyone else. But we live in an interconnected world. If your actions do affect someone else’s property value, insurance premiums, tax bill, sleep patterns, etc., they’re entitled WRDQRSLQLRQ³,¶P¿QH with your biscuits, but if I have to pay for that unplanned ‘bun in the oven’...”) Sorry if I’m going out on a limb here. Ignoring the elephant in the room has such a proven track record in families, business and politics!!! Discernment and acknowledgment of nuances are virtues to be valued above knee-jerk reactions. There is a vast difference between (a) using high- powered binoculars to gather bedroom gossip and Letters Policy '$11<7<5(( TYRADES! &DJOHFROXPQLVW EVWDWLQJ¿UPO\WKDW\RX will not let your 6-year-old child pay a return visit to a home where loaded high- SRZHUHG¿UHDUPVDUHOHIW lying around in the open. The adage about not judging a man until you’ve walked a mile in his moccasins usually applies, but you could try out the entire shoe closet of some people and not come close to justifying their wrongheaded actions. Granted, some societal problems arise from arranged marriages or being IRUFHGLQWRDQLOO¿WWLQJ career path. But headstrong, impulsive, self-centered actions account for vastly more of the business for drug rehab programs, battered women shelters, Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University, jails, prisons, loan sharks and the like — in spite of the ubiquitous “And I turned out OK!” mantra. Maybe you never signed on to be a role model, but that’s just part of the human condition. I never signed on to get callouses from continually biting my tongue. Let’s meet in the middle. Always examine your motives. If you’re giving advice, are you really trying to be helpful? If you’re receiving advice, are you rejecting it for good reasons or because you have a chip- on-the-shoulder response that everyone who disagrees with you is a hypocritical hater? The wishy-washy think their relatives, friends and co-workers are ALWAYS right. The hardheaded think their relatives, friends and co- workers are NEVER right. If we could all develop the common sense and intestinal fortitude to judge life’s events on a case-by- case basis, life could indeed be gravy. — ©2015 Danny Tyree. Danny welcomes email responses at tyreetyrades@ aol.com and visits to his Facebook fan page “Tyree’s Tyrades.” Danny’s weekly column is distributed exclu- sively by Cagle Cartoons Inc. newspaper syndicate The Hermiston Herald welcomes original letters for publication on public issues and public policies. Submitted letters must be signed by the author and include the city of residence and a daytime phone number. Phone numbers will not be published. Letters may be mailed to the Hermiston Herald, 333 E. Main, Hermiston, OR, 97838; or emailed to editor@hermistonherald.com odern life can get awfully complicated. In our continuing quest to navigate these state- of-the-art raging rapids while keeping body and mind upright, we should be forgiven the occasional tendency to overthink things (like the previous sentence). What America really needs right now are some simple common-sense solutions. And we here at Durstco are honored to offer up a couple of modest proposals. • The California Drought. It is estimated there are more than 1,100 golf courses in the Golden State. How hard would it be to replace all the fairways with green-colored cement? It’s be a quick and easy way to save thousands of gallons of water a day. On the plus side, golfers get true bounces and double distance on drives, resulting in lower scores and precipitating a rise in self-esteem. It’s the ultimate California win-win. • Homeless Problem. Give the indigent all across the country free bus tickets to New Orleans. They’d fit right in with all the Phish fans who never left after the band’s various Jazz Fest appearances. • Gay Marriages. All gay wedding planners in :,//'8567 RAGING MODERATE &DJOHFROXPQLVW states that discriminate should order double wedding cakes with two grooms and two brides on top, and when the magic moment arrives, toss the superfluous genders away. Or let the new spouses eat them. • Keeping Iran From Getting The Nuclear Bomb. Hand Israel a map to all Iranian nuclear production sites. Oh wait, they probably already have it. Never mind. • Traffic Congestion. Any moving violation or parking ticket results in a driver’s license being taken away for 30 days. Of course, Uber drivers will rule the world. As long as they don’t get a ticket. • Education. More nuns. • Rising Income Inequality. Take a little money from all the really rich people and give it to really poor people to kind of even things out. Novel idea, but bet it would work. • Obesity. Move all kitchens to the third floor. • Drugs. All drugs are legalized, but can only be purchased from state government outlets. Then merge operations with Department of Motor Vehicles. • Climate Change. Just ignore it. It will go away. Or we will. • Corrupt Politicians. Whenever a politician is caught lying, cheating or stealing, they are legally bound to participate in an aversion therapy program and forced to watch recordings of Joe McCarthy while riding a stationary bike next to Lance Armstrong who exhorts them to “move it, Chubby” through a bullhorn. • Voter Turnout. Free pizzas. But only one to a customer. Even in It is estimated there are more than 1,100 golf courses in the Golden State. How hard would it be to replace all the fairways with green-colored cement. Chicago. • Federal Debt. Just ignore it. It will go away. Or we will. • Greed-Centric Corporations. More nuns. • Economic Growth. Inveigle Starbucks to increase caffeine content of drinks by 10 percent. Prompting people to stay up longer, leading to a corresponding leap in consumer purchasing. • Racism. Once a year, each registered voter receives a one night’s stay in a five- star hotel with all expenses paid, and after an extended trip to the hosted bar, is encouraged to enter a darkened ballroom with mattresses covering the floor and everyone hooks up with members of the opposite sex with total legal impunity. Within three generations, the whole country will be the exact same color. Tawny. So there you have it. Some simple common sense solutions to save this country stress. No need to thank us, we’re only here to help. — Copyright © 2015, Will Durst, distributed by the Cagle Cartoons Inc. syndicate. Will Durst is an award- win- ning, nationally ac- claimed political comic. Email Will at durst@ caglecartoons.com LETTER TO THE EDITOR T3$ Zill Eene¿t Oregonians down the road at ConAgra or your neighbor’s farm, by supporting trade you are supporting them. Washington is abuzz about some- As we speak, the president and his WKLQJPDQ\RIXVNQRZ¿UVWKDQGKDV administration are negotiating trade a profound impact of Oregon: trade. DJUHHPHQWV LQ WKH $VLD3DFL¿F UH- If you haven’t been following it, you gion and Europe that have the poten- might want to. Here in the Columbia tial to expand trade and bring even Basin region, chances are you know more jobs and opportunities here to someone whose job depends on Oregon. But Oregonians can’t har- trade. Consider this: Over 484,000 ness these incredible opportunities Oregon jobs depend on international without Trade Promotion Authority, WUDGH RQH LQ ¿YH DQG WUDGHUHODWHG or TPA. employment has grown 4.6 times Under TPA, Congress opens up faster than total normal employment. the negotiating process by requiring Whether it’s your friend who works congressional consultation and out- lining negotiating priorities for the president. If we want the best possi- ble trade agreements for Oregon and the United States, Congress must pass TPA. It’s no secret that Hermiston is a major transportation hub, and with the Port of Morrow just up the road, we can’t afford to stand on the side- lines. The trade debate is heating up in Washington, and I encourage you to urge our Congressmen to pass TPA and get the best possible deal for you, your neighbors and friends. ROD HARDIN HERMISTON ELECTED OFFICIALS STATE District 29: Sen. Bill Hansell, R-Umatilla Co., 900 Court St. N.E., S-423, Salem, OR 97301, 503-986- 1729. 101 S.W. Third St., Pendleton, OR 97801 (541) 278-1396. E-mail: ssen.billhansell@state.or.us. District 30: Sen. Ted Ferrio- li, R-John Day; 900 Court St. N.E., S-223 Salem, OR 97301, 503-986- 1950. 750 W. Main, John Day, OR 97845, (541) 575-2321. E-mail: ferr- ioli.sen@state.or.us. District 58: Rep. Greg Barreto, R-Pendleton; 900 Court St. N.E., H-480, Salem, OR 97301, 503-986- 1458. E-mail: rep.gregbarrento@ state.or.us. Website: http://www.ore- gonlegislature.gov/barreto District 57: Rep. Greg Smith, R-Morrow, 900 Court St. N.E., H-280, Salem, OR 97301, 503-986- 1457. P.O. Box 215, Heppner, OR 97836, (541) 676-5154. E-mail: smith.g.rep@state.or.us. FEDERAL U.S. Sen. Ron Wyden Sac Annex Building, 105 Fir St., No. 201, La Grande, OR 97850; (541) 962-7691. E-mail: kath- leen_cathey@wyden.senate.gov; (Kathleen Cathey, community repre- sentative); 717 Hart Building, Wash- ington, D.C. 20510, (202) 224-5244. U.S. Sen. Jeff Merkley One World Trade Center, 121 SW Salmon Street, Suite 1250, Portland, OR 97204; (503) 326-3386; Dirksen 6HQDWH 2I¿FH %XLOGLQJ 6'%% Washington, D.C. 20510. (202) 224- 3753. U.S. Rep. Greg Walden (2nd District) 843 E. Main St., Suite 400, Med- ford, OR 97504, (541) 776-4646, (800) 533-3303; 2352 Rayburn +RXVH2I¿FH%XLOGLQJ:DVKLQJWRQ D.C. 20515, (202) 225-6730
