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About Hermiston herald. (Hermiston, Or.) 1994-current | View Entire Issue (Jan. 14, 2015)
WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 14, 2015 HERMISTONHERALD.COM • A3 COMMUNITY Class gives blended and stepfamilies tools to ease transition BY MAEGAN MURRAY HERMISTON HERALD Francis Gossler knows from ex- perience the issues that may ensue when two families come together to form a blended or stepfamily. Gossler said when she married her husband, Dave Gossler, two years ago, their children handled the situation in very different ways. While her daughter accepted it right away, her son took a bit more time. 7KH VDPH ZHQW IRU KHU KXVEDQG¶V children. “You have two different families FRPLQJ WRJHWKHU ZKR DUHQ¶W XVHG to the same parenting styles, same rules,” she said. “There can be a lot of resentment and tension.” Gossler said while her children were used to doing chores every ZHHNKHUKXVEDQG¶VFKLOGUHQGLGQRW follow the same routine. She said her KXVEDQG¶VFKLOGUHQZHUHDOVRXVHGWR having more activities such as sports available at their disposal, while her children were not. Combine those differences with varying disciplinary practices and WKHDOUHDG\GLI¿FXOWWUDQVLWLRQRIWKH families merging, and Gossler said she and her new husband had to develop a system of their own. She said they worked together to create a family dynamic that would allow them to work out some of their dif- ferences and come up with some compromises, as well. Gossler said she realizes it cer- WDLQO\GRHVQ¶WFRPHHDV\DQGDORW of work is sometimes involved. “It can be really hard,” she said. In the last few years, the Goss- lers had been involved in a divorce care class with another couple, Tra- cie and Jake Broyles, at New Hope Broyles said the biological parent needs to take the lead when it comes to disciplining their own children, while the stepparent needs to step back. “Just because your parenting skills worked when raising your VRQGRHVQ¶WPHDQWKH\ZLOOZRUNWKH same with my daughter, and vice versa,” Tracie Broyles said. Jake Broyles said parents in families frequently feel they can just merge the two families togeth- er, and everyone will be happy, but LW GRHVQ¶W ZRUN WKDW ZD\ +H VDLG to compare it to something tangi- ble, families are like ingredients. +H VDLG VWHSIDPLOLHV FDQ¶W MXVW expect to be blended up together in a blender where they will turn out creamy and smooth. He said families are more like a crock pot MAEGAN MURRAY PHOTO — each person is a different ingre- Francis Gossler, from left, Tracie Broyles and Jake Broyles offer a class for blended and stepfamilies each dient, and everyone will cook at a Wednesday night at New Hope Community Church. different speed. The couples hope the class will Community Church. Last year, the parents and family members with a Tracie have been married now for provide parents and families with a two couples decided the Hermis- set of tools they can use to ease the 14 years, they learn things from the few more ways to deal with certain ton community needed a class to merging of stepfamilies, as well as book and the class they teach every issues that arise. Gossler said the work to become help provide tools for stepfamilies provide those families that have al- week. Many things, they said, they to build stronger relationships and ready been established tools with ZLVKWKH\KDGNQRZQZKHQWKH\¿UVW a cohesive stepfamily is a never-end- ing growing process. ¿JXUHRXWV\VWHPVWKDWZRXOGZRUN how to grow together. The book got married. “I think through our whole lives, for them. costs $14, however if a family can- Tracie Broyles said, between the The class was so successful last not afford the book, the group can two of them, they have four kids, or we will still be working through year that the two couples decided work out a way to get them one at two each. While three of the four things,” she said. “Dealing with to offer the class again this year. no charge. children were adults by the time she graduations, vacations, kids and While the class, which runs for eight The class is free to anyone who and her husband got married, Tracie grandkids. This is a life-long pro- ZHHNVKDGLWV¿UVWVHVVLRQODVWZHHN is interested, and it takes place at %UR\OHV¶ GDXJKWHU ZDV LQ KHU PLG cess. This class helps give you some WRROV , NQRZ ,¶YH WDNHQ PDQ\ RI both couples said people can start 6 p.m. Wednesday nights at New teens at the time. the class at any time. Hope, 1350 South Highway 395, as Jake Broyles said he quickly these home and used them in my ³,WGRHVQ¶WKDYHWREHLQFKURQR- SDUWRIWKHFKXUFK¶VIDPLO\QLJKW$ OHDUQHG KLV SDUHQWLQJ VW\OH ZDVQ¶W own home.” Jake Broyles said the class may logical order,” Jake Broyles said. home-cooked meal is provided to necessarily going to work for Tra- “You can proceed through the book those who are interested at 5 p.m. FLH %UR\OHV¶ GDXJKWHU +RZ WR GLV- be a Christian-based program, but however you want.” before the class starts. The dinner cipline and communicate with their having a Christian background is Broyles said the class follows costs $3 for adults and $2 for chil- step-children, he said, is one of the not necessary. “This class is for anyone,” Tracie the book “The Smart Step-Family,” dren. most important tools he learned Broyles said. E\5RQ/'HDO7KHERRNSURYLGHV Though Broyles said he and from teaching the class. Honoring Martin Luther King Jr. Annual MLK Community Peace Walk planned Monday in Hermiston BY SEAN HART HERMISTON HERALD Since 2001, a local club has honored Martin Luther King Jr. with an annual march in Hermiston. Hermiston Black Inter- national Awareness Club President John Carbage said people should begin gathering for the MLK Community Peace Walk between 11:30 a.m. and noon Monday outside the Hermiston United Method- ist Church, 191 E. Gladys Ave. After welcoming re- marks by Carbage, the at- tendees will sing “Lift Ev- ery Voice and Sing” during the short march west on Gladys Avenue, before turning south on North First Street, east on East Main, north on Northeast Third Street and west on Gladys, ending with a ceremony at Hermiston City Hall. From there, the proces- sion will continue back to the church for a ceremony from 1 p.m. to 2 p.m. in the sanctuary, followed by refreshments in the fellow- ship hall. Carbage said Brandon &OD\WKH3DFL¿F1RUWKZHVW Chapter president of Union 3DFL¿F 5DLOURDG¶V %ODFN Employee Network, will deliver the keynote address about how his life has been DIIHFWHG E\ .LQJ¶V OLIH DQG legacy. “I think Martin Lu- ther King opened a lot of doors,” Carbage said. “I am the manager of terminal op- HUDWLRQV IRU 8QLRQ 3DFL¿F 5DLOURDG DQG , ZRXOG QRW be in the position that I am in if Martin Luther King had never took that walk ... had never stood up for civil rights. I would not be able to vote today. I would not be able to lead other people that were not of my same race. We would not have a black president if it was not for Martin Luther King.” About 100 people usu- ally attend the annual gath- HULQJWKDWFHOHEUDWHV.LQJ¶V work in civil rights for all minorities, Carbage said. Although the local African American community is comprised of only about 60 or 70 people, he said, the we have in the community. 0DUWLQ/XWKHU.LQJZDVQ¶W for uplifting the black man. He was for uplifting the mi- nority, for minority rights. At BIAC, we want to be an DOOLQFOXVLYH JURXS VR LW¶V not just for blacks.” People will gather between Former BIAC president 11:30 a.m. and noon Monday DQG 9LHWQDP YHWHUDQ 5RE- outside of Hermiston United ert Davis said, each year, Methodist Church, 191 E. Gladys the walk has “a beautiful Ave., for a march and ceremo- response and participation” nies honoring Martin Luther from Hermiston residents. King Jr. The community walk, “It kind of warms my culminating in a ceremony at heart because it shows Hermiston City hall, will take there are passionate peo- place from noon to 1 p.m. A cer- ple around that are con- emony will then take place from cerned about civil rights 1 p.m. to 2 p.m. at the church, and equality and fair hous- followed by refreshments. ing, fair living and raising up awareness to the spirit area is home to many mi- that Martin Luther King norities. was representing,” Davis “You have such a broad said. “As a pastor and a ci- melting pot here in Herm- vilian, he stood up for all LVWRQ´ KH VDLG ³,W¶V QRW SHRSOH,¶OOXVHRQHRIKLV based on how many Afri- quotes: He says that God can Americans we have in is not just interested in WKH FRPPXQLW\ ,W¶V EDVHG EODFNPHQ+H¶VLQWHUHVWHG on how many minorities in all men.” MLK Community Peace Walk 22 nD ANNUAL Tri-Cities Sportsmen Show Friday, Saturday, Sunday January 16, 17, 18 at in Pasco &RI PM s 3AT AM PM 3UN AM M PM Featuring Carbage said the club was started to promote the MLK Community Peace :DON ZKLFK LV WKH FOXE¶V largest event, but funds are also being collected to provide scholarships for local minority students who will attend a local college. He said the club will ask the students to speak at the annual walks. The club also supports the Hermiston Warm- ing Station and mentors young men experiencing domestic issues, he said. Currently, about 20 people are members of the BIAC, which meets at 2 p.m. the second Saturday of each month at Starbucks, he said. “We do have members from all races currently holding positions in the club,” Carbage said. “We encourage all people to MRLQ :H¶UH GHDOLQJ ZLWK older members, so we need some young mem- bers to keep the club going to keep the dream alive.” For more information, call Carbage, 541-701- 7073. Phone and Internet Discounts Available to CenturyLink Customers The Oregon Public Utility Commission designated CenturyLink as an Eligible Telecommunications Carrier within its service area for universal service purposes. 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