Image provided by: Morrow County Museum; Heppner, OR
About The Ione independent. (Ione, Or.) 1916-19?? | View Entire Issue (Oct. 5, 1928)
V f Embarra$s!ng Pedestrians In one of the busy streets of fllnsgow, Scotland, recent l.v were n mured by iwivl strains of music Issuing apparently from young no m n n, who was Mushing furiously. She had Just bought orlnble radio sot thnt hml not boon phut off when she left the store. While he was on the street theltlas (row station began broadcasting nml she did not know at first how to shut oil the machine. Blackttone Sir Wllllnm Iilackstone published In 1705 a volume entitled "Commen taries on the Laws of England. " This was the first and only book of Its kind in Knglnnd, and it came to be regarded as nn authoritative revela tion of the law. While It has ceased to be of much practical value as an authority in the courts, It remains un arbiter on all public discussions on the law or the constitution. Garage Floor A layer of cinders six Inches thick makes a very satisfactory floor for the home garage. The cinders should be thoroughly stamped down, a hose be ing used to wet them down during the operation. This floor absorbs grease, oil and gasoline that may leak out of the mechanism and It Is, moreover, practically dustless. Novel Menu When Jackie returned from his first party his mother was eager, of course, to hear all the details of the festivity. When asked what he had to eat. Jackie said "rink Jumbo and thumbs:" Ills mother, quite mystified, tele phoned his hostess, and found that cherry Junket and lady fingers bad been served. Lord Effingham A good many towns In the United States are called Effingham. There Is always a renron. During the Revolu tionary war, Lord Effingham resigned Ms commission In the English army, refusing to fight the Americans after England employed the Hessian mer cenaries. E. W. Howe's Monthly. Expensive Advice "Olve the children hammer and saws," reads a column of advice to parents. Tes, let the little darlings practice on the piano lees cr the bed atpad. Some lovely and nnlque pat terns can be traced on dresser fronts with the claws of hammer, for In stance. Louisville Courier-Journal. Training Inditpentable Oh, yes, yon can browse amund and pick tip a living without an education, bnt even a Jackass, to be of any use In the world, must be trained. If your only ambition Is to lire yoo have al ready accomplished that and may as well move on. Houston Post-Die-patch. The Looie Handle Is there anything so annoying al to have an umbrella whoe handle comes olT each time yon raise It? Fill the cavity In the handle with melted alum and then quickly press the stick Into it. holding It firmly until It sets. Heart at Body't Monarch tr. William Harvey, who demon strated the circulation of the blood through the body, dedicated his book describing his work to the king, stat ins that "the king In his kingdom Is like the heart In the body." Meaning of F ence Fence soon will be nothing bnt country word, for In the cities fences have almost been forgotten, tt ts a word, though, full of romance, being shortening of defense the first os of a fence being to keep out foes. Woman't Weapon After all, the woman who never sheds tears ts not as lovable a the woman who occasionally sobs. Emo tionalism In women makes ber admir able. Atchison Olobe. A Fellow Feeling Ton can't realize bow Bolshevist feels If yoo nerer have bought a $.15 suit and beheld the same kind In the window nejt day reduced to I14.9S. Human Nature When two start Into the world to gether, he that ts behind, nnless his mind proves generous, will be dis pleased with the other. Collier. Cott of Englith Roadt The main roads In and i round Lon don and other large English cities cost approximately $1,000 er aifle an nually to maintain. n E e p if v t . . - " ii l n WELL CR MONEY BACK Your rit.t llmlnaterl or fM rf undtd l tli WkjrifcN A&( KANCtwc ftivclnadmlnliler. irtg I fit nr. L. J. IXan laimnjf sion-turqfcal met hud of treat mcnt, (Uud by ut cicluclvrly) Kemarkutrlf lucent alto with n tlierK fetal and Culonallmciilf. bendlOIMY lor rKl.h 10O v naac book Ivlnd da-tail and liECTALw COLON CLINIC W N Tl n H " ' LIFE'S LITTLE 3- JESTS 2S STICKING TO DIET Two friends who had not met for a long time sat In a restaurant talking. "How Is old Snagcs, the company promoter, getting on?" Inquired oue. "Oh, he's not beeu feeling very well lately," was the reply. "He has to keep to a very strict diet Just a little of certain special food." "What's wrong with him?" queried the other. "Indigestion? Insomnia? "No. In prison." London Tld-Blts. EASY TO FIGURE "Say Jim, what's tliet blank space np there fer where all them ads are?' "Don't you know Bill? Why that's for the people what can't read, silly." Take 'Em Tou nerd ne'er sk her for a kiss. For the tips of cut Llitit Are Just an Invitation, Bo, To In and gat buey. For Hit Own Improvement Mr. Newglit Holtail says he met you on the street and yoo refused to recognize him. He's common folks and all that, I know, but he's dia mond In the rough. His Dnusbter I know he's a dia mond la the rough. That's why I cut him. The Stay-at-Home "Tour wife U busy with politics?" "llrlllluntly," answered Mr. Meekton. "Tou huve to do a great deal of reading to bold your own?" "I do. And I find It difficult." "What do you read? "Mostly the cook book." Washing ton Star. Meeting Man't Needt "Tou have made some wonderful ex plorations of ancient tombs." "I have," said the eminent archeol oglst. "And I am Inclined to think that the ancients would have contrib uted more to human progress If they bad paid less attention to private monuments and more to skyscrapers." BROWN AS A BERRY "Ob, how perfectly glorious you look, Mrs, Van Lucre, wltb tbat won derful cout of tun." "'Scuse ire, lady, but youse has got me mixed. I's Mrs. Van Lucre's Dew cook." Wildcat A wildest sits upon a tree, In fretful contemplation. I'm (lnd you'r j-jit a feline free, And not a speculation. In Thit Age "Tou seem to be willing to listen to these hard luck stories." "Yes, It Is sometimes a relief to hear about somebody who Is Inefficient." Louisville Courier-Journal, Hardly the Thing "Slinkespeurenn stuffs seem to be the go. like me a success slogan or quotation." "'Neither a borrower nor a lender be.'" "Hut this is for a bunk." Fithing "Hear about Flubdub? "No." "lie went fishing one dny and his wife didn't see him again for sevtn yea rs." "I haven't that much pntlence with the flali." Louisville Courier-Journal. Might Get Hooked Gilbert Never tell a girl yoo love her. tieruld Why not? "She'll probably believe you. ''111 OUR COMIC SECTION Events FINNEY OF THE FORCE uOTS- wuv sore, wats " ,1;, ScE!:HEC! xA ' LOTS-, 1 I FOINCl-AMHAVC f WuL I tT A NlCt? vV ' 1 ofS csTATf' VvaAAXlVW0S?KSI5?J l' WNTrSf WrtO SMS. WAREAL A. V "7 iKTEBESTtD-BOTIH Srfll 'I f SM SA THE FEATHERHEADS Drive Yourself Fanny ' wm WN,lls 1 & U oor of ouj (o-Stoo 1 I "Im I y' CABS OH W AV'. U ON flGHIVt eTfaataraHawapaparUalot) I oSnoPlUS- in the Lives of Little Men A Means to Another End "Cafe of the Godt" Jt was the Idea of the Chaldean and I'luloiilt! philosopher that the "itatw of the gotU" was located In t'nprl coriius, say Naluro Miiiiln. Through this l released by, tlealh returned to heaven, whllsj Ihroiigh the "gale of u" In the con. slellittlou of t'linwr, souls tlesceiided from heaven In the bodice of men. The poelllons of these two "gates" correspond to the poslllous of the two solsllces, winter mid summer respeo lively. Cfttalina Iiland Yieldi Many Ancient Treasure Aviilon, Sanla Oilullim Island, CaU An ntlempt to follow ancient trull to the longlost Muhtt temple o( fliliilgclilnlch, the Hun Ood, ha r. suited Instead In the discovery of the burial place of a email Indian prln cess of 11,000 years ago and evidence Indicating that child sacrifice were muilo In wholesale fashion by tribe of the Channel Islands, oh the coast of California. ' Within tt stone urn weighing 131 pounds and fashioned skillfully a though by modern tools win fount! the skeleton of an Indian girl be tween five and seven years. Her bauds apparently had clutched the rim of nn urn, whose rich ornnmenta tlon of wampum bespeaks her royal lineage. In a circle with the urn ns a en ter were counted by I'rof. Italph (illd den, curator of tho Calallna museum of Channel Inland Indiana, Ihn skele tons or 01 children burled III tier four deep with small heads touching cio ll other. Ileneiilli them Was tho skeleton of a seven foot num. A sx-ar blade still wns II tod In the ribs. The Bund wlllilu thit funeral urn hud the flpiienrnnce of ground crystal apparently, ncconllng to the dlacov t-rcr, a sacred sund uetl In tha Imrlul of Indian royalty awl " far dlf fcri-nt fr that which bnd sifted oer the graves of the other children. Tliemi llutla lis well as a wealth of olnlillnn ktiin-a, sinr points and ar row heiuls ami hundreds of other ar il. Irs of MBttipuiii'liiliild stone end bono have provided material over whlrh tilltlih-n tins puttied since be dlscoered them. IMio thin piece of slate he believes to be a stone map, boles having been drilled to Indicate trails to the four tmiln btirjlng grounds on Santa Cala Una Inland. "It Is plausible," (Hidden suld. "that the slriinite child burial within the urn and those surrounding It were the result of a natural dentil of little girl of high rank and the sluy Ing of fit attendants and plnymutc with her. Or they nil limy have been killed In Borne religious ceremonial rile. "It Is even possible the prlncras may lime been ghen some potion nml bur lei! nlli. Tin, wnv Hi snintl hstuls clutched the outer rt tit of the bowl aillfce tills a liosillilllty." Wampum Inlaid In four broken circles mi the rlin of the urn with "gates' leading In the four points of Him r,ilni,tiaa leuil f It I ilil.-n In li..ll..ia the burial place may l near the site or the temple or liltiigrliinirll. Cuffer Stored lor Winter Tim liepartmeiii of Agriculture suy that for buiter, to be stored for win ter llc, pasteurized sweet crenni should be used, churned al a low teni-IM-ruture and the butler washed s that It will be firm and waxy. Holla or prints ol butter should be wrapped, In parchment butter iner, placed In A bIoimi criH-k, and covered with siroiig brine. Ilutler should I stored In as eiMil a place as la avnllnble and In a place free from odors likely to be al soi bed by the butler. Popular trio three meals a day. WhenRod Sours Lots of folks who think they have "liitllgeNllou" have only an acid condi tion which could be corrected In five or ten minutes. An effective nntl add like Phillips Milk of Magnesia soon restores digestion to normal. I'hllllps does away wit Ii nil that sourness and gas right nfler meals It prevents the distress an npt to occur two hours lifter eating. What a pleas ant preiiarulloii to tnkt-1 And how good It In for the system! t'nllke a hurtling dose of soda which Is hut temporary relief nt best I'lillllp Milk of Magnesia tietiirnllzee mini times ll volume In ncld. Next time hearty meal, or too rich a diet ha brought on tha least dis comfort, try PHILIPS 1 Milk . of Magnesia
