Image provided by: Morrow County Museum; Heppner, OR
About The Ione independent. (Ione, Or.) 1916-19?? | View Entire Issue (April 23, 1926)
Doctor! Say This Prescription is Good for Worn cn . . .(. .' , t. " ' . 1 Portland "I tliluk to well of Dr. Fierce's Favorite Prescription a woman 'i medicine that I take pleasure in giving Ihil statement for publication. One time I was in a run down and nervous state of health due to weakness and functional diiturliancet. I had very little blood, lost in weight and got very tlim and pale, I got where I could not do mv work, I wai advised ly a doctor to lake I)r, Pierce's Favorite Preserip tion and it wat a life-tavrr to me, 1 grew lining and well, gained in weight, my nerves were In good condition and I never suffered any more (rom my former trouble." Mrs, T. F. Crady, ?)i Vancouver Ave. Your health it your moit valuable asset. So, why not get tint Prescrip tion today from your druggist. Write lr. I'ietce, President of the Invalid' Hotel in lluffato, N. Y, if you feel the need of medical advice, free. They "Ansletad" Little Hilly RlKhy cam In from playing with bla wee trousers torn. Mr. Hlgby was much put out and ai-oldi-d Hilly. "Well, mamma," be aald, "The boy wanted to play bear and thy Just snalated and analsted that I be the bear, o they put me In a barml and a big old nail sprang up etui tore my pant." Capper's Week ly. Couldn't Make the Grade. Janl bad been taken to the borne for feeble minded, but the doctor's examination proved her merely sub normal, o aba was snt bark (o the orphan's home. Held Mamie to Anna In a burnt of confidence. "Janle was sent away to be an Idiot, but she couldn't paaa and had to com back." Pasturage In Marsh. Itomney marali In Kent, England, Is protectud by a seawall of great thick Eras and the guardianship and drain age of the swamp Is In the hand of a apecUl ancient corporation. The level lands afford pasturage for vast flock of aheep which form the princi pal Industry of this section. , Remarkable Remarks. I have rad many bad books, but Done of them ever harmed m. I have bard much bad conversation, but It never harmed mo, most of It proved a warning. It I fall Into a aewer, you may be sure I wilt scramble out as soon a possible. Bo will anyone. K. W. Howe. Storing Flour, Under proper storage conditions flour should keep entirely satisfac torily for three months. Much of the high-grade wheat flour Is kept for a considerably longer period of time. aven for a year or more, and such flour is satisfactory for bread-making purposes. Power of Vibrations. A Iloslon violinist says be can put nut a fliimo with the vibration of his fiddle. Ilut that's nothing. A saxo phone slightly oft key can put out an entire orchestra. Cleveland Plain Dealer. A Common Feeling. "Somo of us wouldn't mind reform Inn," remarked the Man on the Car, "but we wouldn't Ilka to have a re former reform us." Toledo Blade. His Dllsmma. A beaten camlldnte In politics never knows whether ha has a defeat to live down or a moral victory to live up to. Natural Question. Diner (to the doorman as ha loaves expensive restaurant) Er tell ma la there any charge for going out 7 London Opinion. You Want a Good Position Vnry well Talis the Accountancy and Ktiaineaa iHnu-nment, mvat Hcrtaji 1, Calculator, Comptometer, Htnorm prlr, Hcntnanahlp, of Commercial Tih err bourse at Behnke-Walker The forsmoat ttuatnaa Collets of the North weet which has won more Accuracy Awards and Gold Mortals than any otbor eohool In Amarlu, Hand for our Hucoess Catalog. Hour til Street aaar Morrison, -nmna, nr. isuo m. waianr, tr. P. N. U. No. 17, 1928, AHORSE SOLD FOR BEANS By WILLIAM T. ELDRIDCE (0( br Short Starr fak. Co ) W can Imagine old David Harum chuckling over this Yank horas dsal, whsre a sly old horas fancier sot th "double-eroas" In a dsal that bs ax psstsd to gat aomsthlng for nothing. "rfCAN8r Questioned Deacon - Brown. I J "Benns," nodded 81 Burns, In sgreeuiunt The deacon stroked his whit whiskers meditatively and eyed Mr. Burns' cherubic face. Mr. Burns, trader In all things where a dollar was likely to change bands to Mr. Burns' sdvsntuge, was known, at times, to have a penchant tor prac tical jokes. Deacon Brown was a very sedate person and never, knowingly, walked Into a situation which would result In his being made to appear ridicu lous. Yet this offer to part with a good horse, over which there had been a dispute as to weight, appeared filled with doubtful proiiortlona. "You autd 'heuns'J" mused the deacon, eying the placid beast 81 rubbed his round red cheek. "Beans, Deacon," he admitted. "Of course you may be able ter plrk the heft of horse; I ain't snyiu' you alu'L You ral'lat she'll touch eleven sixty and quit right thnr." "She won't go a mite over eleven seventy," snapped the deacon, a trifle Inclined to reseut the Insinuation that he could be nilatukrn. "You be climbing. Deacon eleven seventy." "lie's gettln' ready ter hedge," chirruped little Mr. llctts, who bad wandered out from behind the notion counter of his store Into the warm aunshlne and closer proximity to the argument Tb shrill voice. Intended to be a whisper, did not fall to reach Deacon Brown's sharp cars, and be Bushed the least bit "Kleven sixty," he snapped. "I said It and I stund by It." Then," milled Mr. Burns, "I cal lata ahe'll go Dor. And I'm so sot oo think In' I rsn guess the heft of a bursa that I'll take beans fur her." Perplexity filed th watery eyas of th pillar of th church. "It's a queer way ter sell," b mut tered. "Wall," suggested Mr. Burns, "yon alnt obliged to buy." But th deacon was anxious to buy. As much a he feared trnps and many had been set for him still ba believed he could endure th rink of being made to look ridiculous If he might buy a horse and pay In beana "llow'd yer put It BIT" b Inquired. "You say she'll go eleven sixty. If she goes eleven sixty-one you get th mare, and I get on bean." With the deacon's nod, titer cam B gaap from th encircling villagers. Mr. BetU looked at Mr. Jones; Mr. Bluipllng, the hardware man, regarded Mr. Cutler, th fishmonger; others, with dubious beadahake turned, wide eyed, upon their neighbors. 81 Burns was th last man to be thought of as a foot But this prop osition I "If sb goes better!! sixty one T frowned th deacon. "If she goes eleven sixty-two yoo get th mare and I get two beans two pounds better'n you say, and th bean fvr th fust pound doubled." "Yes," agreed th deacon, growing eager. "If sb goea on pound better still you pay four beans." "And If she foe slxty-fnurt" "Klght beans. Sixteen if sb goes slxty-flv." "You ain't trying to soli me no balkcrT demanded the deacon, fac ing Mr. Burns suddenly. "You hsv tried her," answered Mr. Burns. , Tlie deacon nodded and pondered. Then he thrust his hands deep Into his pockets snd drew a sigh as his eyes considered the prlxe, as good ss his. "SI Burns," he proposed, "I sln't but wondcrlu' If you be gone plum daffy, but I'll take yer." "Yer church says something about being yer brother's keeper," suggested Mr. Burns, th merest smlla touch ing the corners of his eyes. In solemn conclave th deacon and Mr. Burns, the mare following, the village In attendance, proceeded to the scutes. Mr. Belts officiated, nicely balanced the bar feeling the Importance of th occasion and the mar was led onto the plutform, "Twelve hundred Jest," announced the owner of th dry goods store. Tb deacon's fac broudeued Into ons expansiv srallei It was not so much of a disgrace to miss by the mer matter of forty pounds when, to offset whut little chagrin he might feel, came the ownership of good horse for a few beans. "Wall, SI," he chuckled, "you can six 'cm up fur heft. But I ain't kicklu' at yer bavin' the better on me thur. I'll fetch down yer sixty beans next time I drive 'in." "How many?" mused Mr. Burns, "Sixty?" questioned th deacon. "On fur the fust," mused Mr. Burns, two fur the second, four fur the third, eight fur the fourth. Then sixteen fur the fifth, and thirty-two fur the sixth. Ooln' on, as was to be the way, sixty-four fur the seventh, on hun dred snd twenty-eight fur" "Oh, wall," broke In the deacon," Til' male 'ft er bushel, 81, and that will be a mite mora than' comln' t yer by rights." "Suppose we see on that," suggested Mr, Burns. "Mr. Betts, en a w use your store fur a moment?" ' (Jladly, Mr. Betts offered arcom modutions for the settlement of s question which seemed to have great er possibilities than nuy of the at tending crowd funded. With paper and pencil Mr. Burnt bent over the cleared counter. "Jim," he suggested, figuring slowly, "will yer go In snd git s quart of beans from TlbblnsT" With th return of th messenger, Mr. Tlbblus In his wuka, and all of Mr. Tlbbln' customers, Mr. Burns dumped the benns upon th counter. "Count 'em, Betts, snd cast out the broken one," and bs went back to bis figures. The deacon, resting one foot and then the other, held silent as long as possible, "What In tarnation, 81, ba you count In' a quart of beans fur? I'll make It two bushels, and I cal'late then you'll be gettln' niore'n you should have comln' ter yer." "So," mused Mr. Bunts; "wall we'll see," and ha went on with bl grow ing column of figures. II was throtiuh with his task be fore tb quart of beans was counted snd meditatively his cigar turned from corner to corner of his mouth as b watched th flies on tb screen door. At last Mr. Betts drew a sigh. "I ain't sayln' I'm jest right," be ad mitted, mopping bla brow, "but them are In piles of one hundred, and I makes It three thousand, four hun dred and alxty-two beana In a quart" Mr. Burns nodded. "If th deacon ain't objertln'," he suggested, "we'll call It even three thousand and four hundred." "SI Burns," thundered the deacon, "what has the number of beans In a quart got ter do with this thlnT Mr. Burns glanced up from his paper to which be bad been adding more figures, "It means, deacon, that thar be on hundred and eight thousand, eight hundred beau In a bushel," he an nounced. "Wall, I alnt sayln' thar ben't am IT snapped the deacon. "Which being th rase," went on Mr. Burns placidly, "it means that you owe me Jest about 11 v million bushels of besus fur that thar mare." Th deacon got his mouth open snd bis eyes, but Do sound escaped from him for a long moment With him was the audience, sgape. "Wbatr suddenly roared th dea con. "It was on fur th fust two fur tb second, snd so on, doublln' each pound," explained Mr. Burns, patient Ah "At twenty pounds It comes to fir hundred snd four thousand, two hundred and eighty-eight beans, less I've mude some slip. Kur th twenty fust pound over eleven sixty It be double that number which" "Nothing of the sort" roared the deacon. 1 Mr. Burns held forth bis paper, and tb deacon grabbed It With th aid of all who could get within sight, Mr. Burns' figures were gone over. Suddenly, the deacon threw the paper on th counter. "At two fifty a bushel fur beans. Deacon, that thar mar stands yon Jest about twelv million dollars," sug gested Mr. Burns. "You go to Jim jlckey," thundered the deacon, and went out the screen door, startling every fly on th wire. "Say, St," Inquired a breathless voice from th door, "what do yer suppose th deacon will do? II left th mar." "I cal'late," mused Mr. Burns, "the deacon will Jest as soon pay the flgur I sot on her when he fust took a fancy to her. Lest If he don't I dilate I'll have ter tlo her out thar In tb square as his property and ao label her." "Yes," suggested Mr. Betts and Mr. Tlbblns In one breath. "Wall," mused Mr. Burns, "it could be" and he wrote hastily upon a piece of Mr. Belt's wrapping paper, and held the sheet before him. Those who craned their necks read : Deacon Brown's Mar. Sold for Beans. Consideration five million bush els, based on weight over eleven sixty particular from anybody at murket value. Price In cash, twelv million dollars. Sold. Sculptor'i Seal George Julian Zolany says: "While all sorts of scales and measuring sys tems have been evolved at various times, few, If any, modern sculptors go beyond the proportlonul measure ment by which the height of the hu man figure Is divided Into eight parts, taking the head as a unit, or ten parts by taking the face as a unit Person ally I prefer the latter because It ap plies with accuracy to a large number of fixed points of the body. The length of the upper arm front shoul der to elbow Is exactly two fuce lengths, while another two lengths give the accurute distance from the elbow to the second Joint of the fin gers, etc." Sfars Mad Special Study Th first photographs of stars ever attempted In the United States were made at the Harvard observatory In law, and ever since the work has been continued so that now the observatory has a file of thousands of plates which sre not duplicated at any other Insti tution. This monumentul work lists over 225,000 sturs, and gives their brightness, position and spectral type. New York Times. .... ' THE NEW AFFLICTION y DOUGLAS MALLOCH BEHOLD her fixed snd glassy look, Behold her wrinkled brow 1 How Was It reason thus forsook The lady, anyhow? Behold her pule and pallid face: Her maddened gaz Is fixed on space. What does she seek, and also why, This lady wttb the glassy eye? Around her are tb ones she loved, But now she gees them not: The little circle where she moved It seems she ha forgot For now th looks In manner wild On what was one her darling child, A child sb scare remembers now; Ah, yes, what alls bar, anyhow? How aad a reason, dlsenthroned, When reason's light has died, Alas, bow grievously she groaned, How deeply then she slgbed. Her gaze Is fixed upon th star, As If she sought In realms afar Tb author of sou awful doubt I wonder what It's sll sbout? - Behold ber fac, her empty face; Intelligence has fled, Ber maddened gaz Is fixed on space, I wonder, ss I said. Just what sb seeks where planets whirl I wonder Just what alls th girl? Aha, I have It 1 I declare, It's Just th cross-word puzzle stare I kjr Mcciurs Newepsper Srodlcale.) "If you wsr busy bslnf trus To what you know you ousht te do, You'd be so busy you d forest rks bluadsrs of th folks you've met" THE UNEXPECTED GUEST IT AMUSES most of as when we read of tb efficient and capable nouaewlfe who, confronted with unex pected guests, goes to her larder and greets a cold fowl, a bunch of crisp celery and a Jar of mayonnaise, which ah ulckly prepares Into a delectabl aaJad. With rolls, coffee and pre serves, ah acts before her guests a most agreeable luncheon. Bow won derful, when true, but the pity la, It Isn't The fact Is, she Is more often ootrouted with a dish of cold boiled potatoes, a dried tomato "leaning hard against It withered skin," and a tough and world-weary steak, which haa refused to nourish th family. Anyone, efficient or otherwise, with a well stocked larder, may produce an excellent meal, but the woman who has to start In from the vegetable eel' lar and the flour barrel, to prepare a meal and (till looks out cheerfully on life. Is both an optimist and a genius. Te fortify this optimism an emer gency shelf Is Indispensable. Even when th grocery Is Just srouud the corner, It Is wise to have a well stocked shell Each housekeeper will stock her. shelf with the scceasorles snd relishes especially adapted to her .needs. A few cans of fish, such as salmon, sardines, tuna, lobster and codfish balls, which may be used In various dishes, hot cold or as salads. , A few cans of vegetables such as asparagus, string beans, tomatoes and peas. A Jar of sslad dressing and one of cheese, olives, pickles, a few cans of soup of different kinds. Jams snd Jellies and a few packagea of crackers or biscuit Two or three kinds of cookies stored In air-tight Jara, a fruit cake to be used on state occasion. With such a supply, a cupful of tea, coffee or coco, one may furnish many different kinds of appetizing meals. If fortunate enough to live In th country with plenty of eggs, butter, milk snd cream, on need never fear a raid of unexpected guests. (A 1IH, Wsatsrajlswspspsr UbImli 00H0 How It Started By Jean Newton STOOL OF REPENTANCE" WE ARE familiar with this ex pression In reference, to people who are supposed to realize that they have done wrong and who wish to be forgiven or excused for their sin or whatever mistake or misdemeanor they may have committed. 4"Let htm take his place on the stool of repen tance," has often been said, "before be expects consideration from us." The saying comes to us from the records of an old custom, current In the Middle ages In Scotland. The "stool of repentance" was a low stool on which persons had to sit who had committed so offense which brought upon them the censure of the church. Remaining en the stool throughout the service, st Its conclusion the penitent had to stand up and receive tb cen sure of the minister for his transgres sion. We are familiar also In common speech, when the reference Is to a person who Is a strict disciplinarian or one who does not forgive easily, that he or she "will mak you sit en the stool of repentance fur that I" tCserrlghl kr Tk Ball (radii).!, lasj PHDTI Alin wav J. sLir-jViisUr Children, 10 cents Any Time. Continuous 1 to 11 p. W have a wean iransDortauon thm .,,. y, tf it . Qtt day or wsak. FRANKLINS 171.00 AND OTP ALL WORK GUARANTIED Dundee Auto Repair & Machine Works Th Oldest and Best Equipped Repair Plant In Oregon Knat Water and Hnltnon Bt., Partland, Oron Rant V91 ;VLINOER ORINDINO CRANK SHAFT GRINDING GEN. OVERHAULING Hrr-t L. -.to;".. t DROP IRELAND'S SANDWICH SHOP 'Whereto Eat J. Bos LwKbc 2S snd 35 w- rrrprt' FOLKS! 121 (tilth fin-ret Best Horse Collar Made All long rye straw stuffed. 1 Insist on having th ooUar i with th "Klah" Ubal. Hi your dealer doae not handl i this brand collar, writ to us ' P. SHARKIY A SON 61 Union Av.. Fortlan. Ore. Dont Buy From Peddlers. A school principal taking up a col Icetlon for flowers from the faculty walked Into the kindergarten of the school. The principal had Just suc cessfully solicited a donation from the kindergarten teacher and was passing out, when Johnny piped: "Teacher, I wouldn't buy anything from that man. Mother always says to buy In the stores snd not from those ped dlers." Presidential Abode. Following the attack apon the exec utive mansion In 1814, It was painted white, to obliterate the damage done by fire. In popular parlance It was soon called by Its now familiar name, although officially It was known as the executive mansion until Theodore Roosevelt put the stamp of his ap proval on the name "the White House." Methodist Pioneer. The first Methodist preacher In America was Philip Embury, who had been In the Irish Methodist conference before coming to this country In 1761 He found a number of Irish Metho dists In New York city and gathered them Into a email congregation that held its meetings in hts house. Paper Out of Data. What once was known as "butcher paper," the dark, heavy, brown paper used to wrap up meats, is no longer manufactured In any great quantity in the United States. It has been re placed by what Is known as "bogus mantle." The old butcher paper was msde from straw. Simple Home Remedy. For Matrimonial Heartache: A lump of pride dissolved in a glass of common sense. Bwallow Immediately and settle with a kiss. Add a dose of wholesome compliments. Repeat as often as needed. Fond of Their Coffee. The native of Algeria takes strong black coffee In the street, purchasing the beverage from venders who boll It over portable stoves. Changed In Meaning. "Rival" originally meant "one who rtves on the opposite bank of the stream." The word Is taken from the Latin "rlvalls" and Is related to our "rivulet." Power of Love. It there Is anything that keeps the mind open to angel visits, and repols the ministry of III, It Is human love. N. P. Willis. NORTONIA HOTEL Ton Win Feel Bisht st Rons Ben Sail mi Cea&al IsmasUi lake. Excellent Cafe. Bpeelal Weakly Rates. Bus Meets all Trelna. Utk aad Stark. PORTLAND. OREGON PALACE HOTEL 44 Washing ton St., Cor. 12th at. Earnestly solicit your patronage. Teu will hav all th comferu of your own ham. Very reasonable rale and prompt and oourteoua aervtc. Olv u a trial AUGUST K Si ATX Manaeer 4 CHICKS miV'JII blued tMtMl niulrr Hlnte KiitMYol !!hr "Urn. stno our fiMuutle Wwld Bwortl Slrsla Wh. I.5h..rue. IS ire. ran Xfcr 'NWir ""'" sVtler ekleks, bttr veliiae, better efrvlre. Free eslsli'S QUEEN HATCHERY Jay Todd I4SO ISTAvaHUS - SaATTLa MARRY IF LONELY: Join "The Successful Correspondence Club." Re liable; Descriptions free. BOX 654, OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA. OFFERS A MARKET for your PRonurp VAUDEVILLE PICTURES m. Portland, Oregon. few solect car that are big value. Re by. Expsrt repairing and Storag by Mats. Eves. 15c 25c ANDERSON A RICK MOTOR SERVICf otter Franklin Service 402-1 Hon St. at Ninth. ForUanS, Or. Bltoadway 1701 ORECON'S FINEST BEACH RESORT HOTEL Moderate Ratsa. Varltd Amusement TWO COLF UNKS. SF.AStnP. HOTEL SEASIDE. OREGON PORTLAND, or V!5 WaihlnatiM Street. CUT FLOWERS I FLORAL DESIGNS Clarke Brosw Flortata, x7 Morrison St. WE BUY Hides, Pelts, Wool, Mohair, Tallow, Cascara Bark Horse Hair. SaaS as rour shipments. We mail roe check tka asiBs oajr we receive ssoda. Portland Hide a Wool Co. im Wsss Amsf stars, fiaiuae, sarsaa. Oangerl The six most dangerous foreign game animals are the African lion, the African buffalo, the rhinoceros, the Af rican elephant, the man-eating tiger of India and the Indian leopard. Col Theodore Roosevelt considered the lion the most dangerous game of all. The grixzly bear is held to be the . most dangerous American game ani mal Credentials. Football Coach (to applicant for place on team) "What experience have you hadr Applicant "Well hut summer I was hit by two autos and a truck." Boston Transcript Superfluities. A Chicago doctor aays that colds are due to modern luxuries. There Is nothing that most of us would more willingly dispense with than these widespread maladies. The Drawbacks. The two great drawbacks to the happiness of the motor tourist are the billboard and the board bill. The New Yorker. BE The world is a playground for those who are healthy. Nature knows the way to health. Take Iiarkroot Tonic Feels Much Improved. "I hav ben In poor health for some time, system generally run down and aurrerlna; with sever ronetlpstlon. On m-ommendatlnn I tried your Hnrkrout Tonic, and after uln two boll lea I began to feel Improved In every way." MRS. MINNIE CAMPBELL, Portland. For Sale by All Druggist Nature's Own Tonic y i R is er l? Your Health Demands HI M Y celebrated treatment for files and other Rectal and Colon ailments is so sure, so sate, so easily obtained that K Is folly to post pone proper care until your health It en tirely broken down. My new 10()-p.ie Illustrated book, which Is yours for the asking, discusses those diseases, contains score of letters (rom patients, describes my methods snd state my unqualified LuAK ANTES, to per manently relieve you of Piles or refund your Ice. Write or call today. I. DEAN. M D.Inc POHTIANO OFNCM; SEATTLE OFflCtt: Dr Daan Bulllflng sos-sil Sln BuiMme S TM AWCLMAIre 6TM Am O PINC I 1 MM i C t- t.nVSeee i' - W t