Daily evening Albany democrat., July 21, 1888, Page 2, Image 2

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Daily Democrat.
NATIONAL lKU!L'IiATIllTICKET,
For;Prji..i--nl-aaoVEll 3LKVBlAN'D,ef N.-r York
or Vioa PraklMt-.tLt.E!( G. TilURM.VN, of Ohio.
FjrH'rxllW.lal Elector,
ur n R1LYK17. uf'Linn coultv.
W. H. EPKINUKK." ol Multnomih county.
E. K, SK1PWOKTH, ol UmUlIu, count;,
HIIX NYE ON THE TARItT.
On board a Western train the other day
I held in mr bosom for over seventy-five
miles the elbow of a large man whose
name I do not know. .He was not a rail
road hog or I would have resented it. He
was built wide and he couldn't help it, so
I forcave him.
He had a large, gentle, kindly eye, and
when he desired to spit he went to the car
door.opened it.and decorated the entire out
side of the train, forgetting that our speed
would help to give scope to his remarks.
Naturally ,as he sat there by my side.hold
ing on tightly to his ticket and evidently
afraid that the conductor would forget to
come and get it,I began to figure out in iny
mind what might be his business. He had
pounded one thumb so that the nail was
black where the blood had settled under it.
This might happen to a shoemaker, a car
penter, blacksinith.or almost any one else.
So It didn't help me out much, though it
looked to me as though It might have been
done by trying to drive a fence-nail through
a leather hinge with the back of an ax, and
nobody but a farmer would try to do that,
Following up the clew.I discovered that
he had milk on his boots, and then I knew
I was right. The man who milks before
daylight in a dark barn when the thermom
eter is 28' below zero,and who hits his boot
by reason of the uncertain light and the
prudishness of the cow, is a marked man.
He cannot conceal the fact that he is a
farmer unless he removes this badge. So I
started out on the theory, and remarked
that this would pass for a'pretty hard win
ter 01 stock.
The thought was not original with ine,
for I have heard it expressed by others
either in this country or Europe. He said
it would.
"My cattle has gone through a mowful
o' bay sence October and eleven ton o'
brand. Hay don't seem to have the good
ness to it thet it hed last year,and with their
new process griss mills they jerk all the
juice out o' brand, so's you might as well
feed cows with excelsior and upholster your
horse, with hemlock bark as to buy brand."
"Well, why do you run so much to stock ?
Why don't you try diversified farming and
rotation of crops ?"
"Wel!,prob'ly you got that idee in the pa
pers. A man that earns big wages writing
'Farm Hints' for agricultural papers can
make more money with a soft leadpencil
and two or three season-cracked idees like
that'n I can carryingof'em out on the farm.
We used to have a fellow in the drug store
in our town that wrote such good pieces for
the Mural Vermontcr, and made up such a
good condition powder out of his own head
that two years ago we asked him to write
a nessay for the annual meeting of the
Buckwheat Trust,and to use his own judg
ment about choice of subject. And what 1
do you s'pose he had selected for a nessay
that took the whole forenoon to read f "
, "What subjectjou mean ?"
Yes."
"Give it up !"
"Well, he'd wrote out that whole blamed
intellectual wad on the subject of 'The In
humanity of Dehorning Hydraulic Rams.'
How's that ?"
"That's pretty fair."
"Well, farmin' is like runnin' a paper in
regard to some things. Every feller In the
world will take and turn in and tell you how
to do it, even if he don't know a blame thing
about it. There ain't a man in the United
States to-day that don't secretly think he
could run airy one if his other business
busted on him, whether he knows the dif
ference between a new milch cow and a
horse hay rake or not. We had one of these
embroidered night-shirt farmers come from
town bettcr'n three years ago. Been a
toilet-soap man and done well, and so he
came out and bought a farm that had noth
ing to It but a fancy house and barn, a lot
of meddcr In the front yard,and a Southern
aspect. The farm was no good. You
couldn't raise a disturbance on It. Well,
what docs he do ? Goes and gits a passle of
slim-tailed ycller cows from New Jersey
and alms to handle cream and diversified
farming. Last year the cuss sent a load of
cream over and tried to sell It at the new
crematory while the funeral and hollercost
was goin' on. I may be a sort of a chump
myself.but I read my paper and don't get
left like that."
"What arc the pro-pect for farmers In
your state ?"
"Well they arc pore. Never was so pore,
in fact.sence I've ben there. Folks wander
why boys leaves the farm. My boys left so
as to get protected, they said, and so they
went Into a clothing store, one of 'cm, and
one went into hardware, and one is talkin'
protection in the Legislature this winter.
They said that fnrmin' was gettin' to be like
fisliin' and huntin', well enough for a man
'hat has means and leisure, but they
coiddn't make a livin' at it, they said. An
other boy is in a drug store, and the man
that hires him says he is a royal feller.
Kind of a castor roval fc'ler," I cried
with a shriek of laughter.
I Ic waited until I had laughed all I want
ed to,and then he said :
"I've always hollered for high tariff in
order to hyst the public debt, but now that
we've got the National debt coopered I
wish they'd take a little hack at mine. I've
put in littv years farmin'. I never drank
licker in any form. I've worked from ten
to eighteen hours a day ; been economical
in clozs and never went to a show more n
a dozen times In my life ; raised a family
and learned upwards of two hundred calves
to drink out of a tin pail without blowit.g
their vittles up my sleeve. My wife work
ed alongside o' tne sewin' new seats on the
boys' pants,skiminin' milk,and even hclpm
me load hay. For forty years we toiled
along together and hardly got time to look
into each other's faces or dared to stop and
get acquainted with each other. Then her
health failed. Ketched cold in the spring
house, prob'ly sRimmin' milk, and washin'
pans,and scaldin' pails, and spankin butter.
Anyhow she took in a long breath one day
while the doctor and me was watching,
her, and she says to me, 'Henry,' says she,
I've got a chance to rest,' and she puts one
tired, worn-out hand on top of the other
tired, wore-out hand, and. I knew she'd
gone where they don't work all day and do
chores all night.
"I took time to kiss her then. I'd been
too busy for a good while previous to that
and then I called in the boys. After the
funeral it was to much for them to stay
around and eat the kind of cookin' we had
to put up with, and nobody spoke up
around the house as we used to. The boys
quit whistlin' around the bain, and talked
kind of low to themselves about goin' to
town and gettin' a job.
"They're all gone now, and the snow is
four feet deep up there on mother's grave in
the old berryin'-ground."
Then both of us looked out of the car
window quite a long while without saying
anything.
"I don't blame the boys for going Into
something else long'sother things pays bet
ter ; but I say and I say what I know
that the man who holds the prosperity of
this country in his hands, the man that ac
tually makes the money for other people to
spend, the man that eats three good, simple,
square meals a day and goes to bed at 9
o'clock so that future generations with good
blood and cool brains can go from his farm
to the Senate and Congress and the White
House he is the man that gets left at last
to run his farm, with nobody to help him
but a hired man and a high protective tar
iff. The farms in our State is mortgaged
for over $700,000,000. Ten of our West
ern States I see by the the papers has
got about three billion and a half mortgages
on their farms, and that don't count the
chattel mortgages filed with the town clerks
on farm machinery, stock, waggins, and
even crops, by gosh 1 that ain't two inches
high under the snow. That s what the
prospect Is for farms now. The Govern
ment is rich, but the men that made it, the
men that fought perarie fires and pcrarie
wolves and injlns and potato-bugs and bliz
zards, and has paid the war debt and pen
sions and everything else and hollered for
the Union and the Republican party and
high tariff and anything else that they was
told to, is left high and dry this cold winter
with a mortgage of seven billion and a half
on the farms they have earned and saved a
thousand times over."
"Yes; but look at the glory of sending
from the farm the future President, the
future Senator, and the future member of
Congress."
"That looks well on paper; but what docs
it really amount to? soon as a farmer boy
gits in a place like that he forgets the soil
that produced and holds his head as high as
a hollyhock. 11c beliefs for protection to
everybody but the fanner, and while he
sails round in a highty-tighty room with a
fire in it night and day, his father on the
farm has to kindle hisown lire in the morn
ing with elm slivers, and he has to wear
his son's lawn-tennis suit next to him or
freeze to death, and he has to milk in and
old gray shawl that has held that member
of Congress since he was a baby, by gorry !
and the old lady has to sojourn through the
winter in the flannels that Silas wor at the
rlggatter before he went to Congress.
"So I say, and I think that Congress ag
rees with me, Damn a farmer, anyhow !"
He then went away,
Bill Nye.
MCALISTER & WOODWARD.
Homeopathic Physicians & Surgeons
Obstetrics, Treatment of Chronic Dig.
eases of woman und children a specially.
All calls promptly attended day and
nlijht.
Office in the Flinn Block.
BINDING TWINE.
We start In this season with 60,000
pounds of absolutely pure manilla bind
Ing twine, which we will sell at as low a
price as inequality of the goods will ait
mit. There in very little of the pure in
tbe market, and a great deal of poor twine
is being offered at low prices. We would
be glad to till your orders for tbe best.
Stewart dt Sox. j
E FITTIf
I haye just received au ir.voicrjof the celebrated
Thompson Glove Funic Corset,
one of tbe oldest rd mott reliable trake known. I also keep a full assortnie..
The Ball's Coil Spring Ilealh Corse,
Dr. Warner's Health Corset,
Besides a full line of
FRENCH WOVEN CORSET
and cornets varying iu price from 50 cents to 3.00 eacb. I keo, ext a sizi t
and lengths cf abdomiaal, nursing, and Miaaes corsets, and everything ir
waists for chil.'ren and Misses. 1
Samuel E. Young.
THE PLACE.
By all means call on
3arker Brothers,
Successors to Coin Fox, Ur your
Groceries,
Produce, Baked Goods, Etc., Etc.
Their goods are the host and their prices
reasonable.
FOR THE LADIES
Bargains in Millinery,
FINE TRIMMED HATS, BONNETS,
FL0WERS.RIBB0NS1ACES, PLUMES,
SATINS, VELVETS, ETC.,
At Very Low Figures.
These goods must no, soleome earlyland
got nrsi cnoice,
MRS. E,J, 0'CONNER
AT COSTS
Having decided to o'oaejout oubusioess here, we will eelljour j '
ENTIRE STOCK
-OF-
Co thing, Furnishing (Ms.Hati, Cipj, Traaks,
At Cost !
G. L. BLACKMAN,
Successor to B. W. Laiigthn.
DEALER IN
DRUGS, MEDICINES,
CHEMICALS, BRUSHES,
SOAPS, COMBS,
nd everything kept in a .first-class Dnii
Store. Also a flue ntock of pianos sue
organs.
ALBANY. OREGON.
FOSHAY & MASON,
-nxau us Utah
Drnggistsand Booksellers,
Agents for John B. Alden's publications,
whloh we sell at publisher's prices with
ostageadasd.
ALBANY, OHECOH.
Those wisbina bargains will call early before tbe steok isbroken, as these
goods mus; be Boid within the next 90 days.
C. B.Roland & Co.
JULIUS JOSEPH,
Manufacturer of Choice Cigars
-AND DEALER IN-
FINE IMPORTED AND KEY WEST
I.gHrs, Plug ann Smoking Tobaccos, Meerschaum and Briar Pipes, and alfall
line ofSmoksra' Arjsles, Also dealer!
CALIFORNIA AND TROPICAL FRUITS,
Next door to Burkhan dt Koeney's Albany, Oregon,
C. J. DILLON,
WHOLESALE MANUFACTURER OF
FURNITURE,
FRANCIS PFEIFFER,
PROPRIETOR 0 J
Albany Soda Works-
And Manufacturers of
CHOICE CONFECTIONERY,
We are aow prepared to Mil at whole
sale, always fresh and pure at Portland
prlots to dealers, Wa also keep a full
line of
Nuts and Tropical Fruits.
OUR
CIGAR AND TOBACCO
department is cornet, We keep the
rsry finest stock ef saiokjagand chewing
bacco, meerschaum and 'brier pipes that
delight to smokers,