Condon globe., April 13, 1906, Image 4

Topics of
the Times
Tli new battleship's dl?.y speed Is
calculated to make tUo Virginia reel.
The world is Indeed a stage, but the
spectators lire uot charged admission
; fees. ', -' '
s Vuele Satn is about to shut down the
.' lid ou F.erlug Sea, but be cau't soul
, It No seals left ' -
When a young man luforms a girl
,'that oho la the light of bis Ufa, be
, probably means a flashlight
President Roosevelt can find a sure
cure for race suicide in the Senator
Clark uiillion-dollar-baby plan.
One-half the world doesnt know
- how the other half lives because fully
oue-half mind their own business.
An old bachelor says that matrimony
Is an excellent training school for
women who are ambitious to enter the
lecture field.
Dr.. Dowle didn't allow bis modesty
to restrain htm from naming three
men to do the work heretofore per
formed by himself.
Yale's athletic reserve fund has
grown to nearly $100,000. Maybe this
is proof of sport for sport's sake, but
It looks like business. 4
An army girl In New York who mar
ried an octogenarian is now seeking
a divorce. She probably thought that
octogenarian meant eighty millions. .
"A wife Is a luxury," said a Chicago
Judge, but he didn't pretend to give an
exhaustive definition. That would re
quire several pages of the dictionary.
After reading Secertary Wilson's re
port tbe. farmer must be couvuiced
that he Is rich, even If be wears one
gallus and his principal asset Is a yel
low dog.
"Will the coming man marry?" asks
Dr. Madison C. Peters. It depends
somewhat on the fancy of the woman
to whose house he is coining. How
often does he come?
There Is plenty of heroism in the
country, but the hero does not pro
claim his merit from the housetops.
The hero-rewarding commission "may
have to employ detectives.
"Why," asks a foreign visitor, "are
not your college students revolution
ists?" Evidently this gentleman has
not seen them going through some of
their revolutions on the football field.
George Westinghouse, Jr., has en
tered his father's shops as an appren
tice on the same terms as the other
apprentices. Still, the other appren
tices wouldn't be taking long chances
In swapping futures with blm.
Sir Horace Plunkett wants to make
a study of the dietary of the Ameri
can farming class. We will be inter
ested in his remarks when be arises
In the British Parliament full of hog,
hominy and wisdom, and gives a re
sult of bis investigations.
It Is a great thing, tbls glory and
honor of nations. For tt men go and
shoot at perfect strangers without an
Introduction and are shot at by them.
Those who are killed are heroes and
get their names misspelled in a list
The more of these there are the great
er the glory and honor redounding to
the credit of the nation supplying
them. Tbe nation measures Its glory
and honor by the number of Its citizens
slain. So this honor and glory must
be a fine and noble thing.
Some Western college professor has
made a suggestion which seems to
strike at the root of the football evil.
It consists of two propositions first,
that membership on an Intercollegiate
football team be conditioned primar
ily on the candidate's being a gentle
man In the best sense of the word, and
that at the least indication of hoodlum
Ism seen by his associates or coaches
be be punished by Immediate removal
from the list of available players; and,
secondly, that this motto be continu
ously forced upon the attention of all
contestants in intercollegiate sports:
"It Is far better to lose fairly than to
win unfairly."
Books and merchandise committed to
the malls misdirected or underpaid find
their way into the Dead Letter Office,
and are sold by auction In Washington
Just before Christmas each year.
Countless misunderstandings and
heartburnings have been occasioned by
tbe mistakes which the auctioneer's
Luge pile each year represents. Per
sons for whom the articles were In
tended wonder why they never beard
from old friends, particularly those far
away from home, and those who sent
these things feel hurt because the sup
posed recipients have never been polite
enough to make acknowledgment No
one can look at tbe stacks of misdirect
ed articles without realising the deslrn
Mltty of a charitable Judgment of those
who, we think, have treated us shab
bily. The Dead Letter Ortlce collec
tions constitute a touching arpenl for
leniency.
One la forced to wonder not that
there Ib fighting, but that there Is not
much fighting that the practice of
hazing should become dangerous or lm
possible. Courage, physical and moral.
Is supposed to be one of the marks i f
the naval officer, but have the cadets
not been establishing a system of cow
ardlce In permitting themselves to be
mauled by young brutes without mak
ing a fight for It? When a new boy
enters an English public school be
must Inevitably fight lie Is forced to
fight by some youth who attempts to
put an Indignity upon him, and when
tbe affront Is given the battle Is on.
Tho English system seems to be the
better one. It la possible to understand
the code which Impels a midshipman
or other youth to fight to preserve hi
self-respect but it is hard to under
stand the code or state of mtnd which
coerces the future officers of the navy
to submit tamely and submissively to
brutal Indignities.
Cultivated and prosperous people
often complain that the working ser
vants of cities are Ignorant, Job-seek-Ing
and Incompetent Yet seldom does
the mau of cultivation and means go to
work for his community In the hum
bler offices where there Is much labor
and little honor or political Influence.
But there are exceptions. A young
novelist is mayor of Toledo. A mil
lionaire has been appointed superin
tendent of streets in Cincinnati his
wealth was acquired before he entered
the office. A late fire commissioner of
Syracuse was a millionaire and college
graduate; he built a model engine
house at his own expense and Im
proved the department by his own
example. Years ago an Indignant citi
zen of Boston complained to the mayor
that the street sweepers were an un
gentlemauly crew. "I know It" re
plied the mayor. "I've tried to get
our first families to wield the brooms,
but they won't do it"
Most English-speaking persons think
that the bust place for a Chinese is
In China. He no soner migrates to a
country Inhabited by users of English
than tbey begin to tell him how un
welcome he Is. The history of Chi
nese Immigration in tho United State
Is familiar. Laborers were needed on
tbe Pacific coast and tho Chinese
came, or were brought, In large num
bers to supply tbe demand. Then the
white men began to protest against
the competition of the Asiatics, and
after a time Chinese laborers were for
bidden to enter the country. The situ
ation In the gold-mining region of
South Africa to-day is similar to that
In California when the Chinese began
to flock there. The mine owners have
not been able to get white or black la
bor enough to work their mines to
their full capacity. A year ago the
Importation of Chinese coolies began,
and now there are forty-flve thousand
of them In the district They were ad
mitted against the protest of the Brit
ish colonies in the southern Pacific,
and in spite of the objections of pub
lic men in Great Britain. Already the
question of discontinuing the policy
has become a party issue in England.
The Liberals declare that the condi
tion of the Chinese is practically one
of slavery. Moreover, they ahsert that
the Chinese have made life unsafe in
the mining district; that men are
afraid to leave their families alone,
and that it has become necessary to
barricade the doors and windows of
the houses at night and to sleep with
firearms within reach. All this Is de
nied by the adherents of the govern
ment who maintain that the situa
tion Is exaggerated or wholly misrepre
sented, and that the introduction of
Chinese labor has made South Africa
prosperous. A most serious phase of
the situation is that the three or four
hundred million Chinese at home arc
beginning to tike note of the treat
ment of the Chinese away from home,
and are resorting to retaliatory meas
ures against foreigners In China.
Belf-Defenae.
Saleslady I am resigning my posi
tion. I'm going to marry Mr. Kash
collar of the necktie counter.
Manager Why not keep on work
ing, anyhow?
Saleslady Gee! You don't know
Bobby. If I don't quit my Job he'll
quit his. Cleveland Leader.
Not If Me Is Good.
Little rreddy (after listening to tbe
usual matutinal quarrel between his
father and mother) Mamma, if a lit
tle boy Is very, very good ail the time
when he is little, does he have to got
married when he's grown up? Fnm-ille-Journal.
It might be well for parents to re
member that spoiled children coins
home to roost
PUTS 8AIL ON HIS 8LEI0H.
Yovajr Farmer Katrlcetea ltttuavlf
from lr4lmat fer lacvnaltr.
A reut.rkable adventure befell a
Tolley, N. I)., man. While the Tolley
Topics did not hsvo a reporter ou the
spot, It secured and printed tho story,
but without those side lights uud high
lights that the Incident seems to de
mand.
Michael Pattlson, a young farmer
near Tolley, was driving home In his
sleigh across tbe prairie. Tho wind
had beateu down the snow, the war:u
wave bad melted the top layers and
the cold ulghts bad froscn them until
there was a crust on the snow Unit
would bear a nuiu's weight. The
horse, remembering the barn, was
making rapid time for home wheu the
sleigh went into a thuuk-youmit'uin
and remained there. The horse and
shafts went ou home.
PaUlson stood In the road, stamped
his feet and cussed the luck. A tierce
wind was blowing In the direction of
home and he bad about made up bis
mind that It would be fairly easy to
walk the ten miles wheu an idea
struck blm. It was a life saver.
Paulson pulled the sleigh out of the
rut and dragged It out on the prairie,
The wind was so fierce that the sleigh
would almost skid along of Itself. But
Paulson, with two slats - and some
wire, rigged np the lap robe as a sail,
gave the craft a running start. Jumped
In and was at once slipping across the
prairie like an Iceboat The only trou
ble was that there was no eertalu way
to guide the craft But Pattlsou hung
one leg out behind and did some little
steering with it Fortunately tbe wlud
was In exactly the right quarter or we
would have to do some lying about
how Tattlson "tacked."
Facts compel us to admit however,
that the wind was rtxht The craft
quickly overtook the astonished horse,
who bad now reduced himself to a
trot and soou left him hull down In the
distance. In fact, the sleigh and oo
cuoaut arrived homo twenty minutes
ahead of the brute and in snubbing up
banged into the barn so hard that It
frightened the cow.
When the hero of this tale told It
on the streets of Tolley the Tolleyans
started a Uttlo and looked surprised.
Some of them whistled softly and
looked meditatively away at the hori
zon. Others doubted. Minneapolis
Journal.
MILLIONS OF LIVE STOCK.
IncrM of IpanUh AnlruaU I m
ported Into America.
The Increase of horses, cattle and
other domestic animals imported by the
Spaniards to the- new world was mar
veloua The Gnceta de Mexico for Oc
tober, 172.S, reports that In the month
around the city of Puebla alone there
had been sold 10,OU) mules at $10 a
head and 10,000 horses at 18, 20 and 24
reals (f.&0 to $0) each.
In 1742, when Admiral Vernon threat
ened the Mcxlcau coast one haoendado,
Don Fernando do la Campa, Conde Han
Mateo de Valparaiso, offered 1,000 sad
dle horses for the defense of Vera Cms
and promised 60,000 more if needed!
The figures of this Increase astounded
the most cxiierlenced travelers and
some of the shnrjost polemics In early
American history were leveled by ex
perts against Eurojiean armchair hls
torlnns who fancied that the horse, ox
and other beasts had "deteriorated" In
America. The world certainly had
never before seen any such multiplica
tion. What It amounted to Is Indicated by
the fact that vessels and whole fleets
sailed for Spain laden exclusively with
the hides of cattle already In . 1JW7
Acostn noted the exportation of 100,7."1
hides from San Domingo and Mexico
alone In one flota. The prices to which
these animals fell are even more signifi
cant if compared with prices that
ruled at the time of tho conquest In
1780 good work oxen could be tonight
in the City of Mexico at $10 the yoke
and In Guadalajara for $0. In Nueva
Gallcla a good horse could be had for
$2 and a mule for $3, ana It was' not
uncommon to buy n manndn of twenty-four
mares with their stallion for
$25. In Chill at the same time one
could buy a gooil trotter for $1.
After this It seems almost gratuitous
to remark that many Mexican gentle
men owned 50,000 head of cattle and
horses apiece and some far more, or to
recall the fact that one Mexican cav
alier, Juan Ordunn, about 1050, had on
his hacienda in one year a "crop" of
30,000 calves.
Moon Ik Coimtant.
The old Idea that changes are taking
place on the moon carefully has been
Investigated by M. Puiseux, a French
astronomer. Going over all records,
from the earliest observations to the
latest be concludes that the reality of
the supposed changes has not been
proved, and that the varying sensitive
ness of tho retina to faint objects Is
sufficient to account for differences
seen, while different conditions of ex
posure might explain ull appearances
In the photographs.
If you are the right sort of man the
world will hour of you after your de
HAD CATARRH
Congressman Mcekison Gives Praise to
Pc-ru-na for His Recovery,
v . L ,-'
v ..- n- .
WW
BrriWLIAVTi . . .M ; , , .
CONGRESSMAN MKKISON PRAISES FE-RU-NA
Hon. David Meekisos, Napoleon, Ohio, ex-member of congress, Fifty-fith
district, writes:
"I have used Severn) bottles of Pcruna and I feel rrrntly brnrfttlrd Ihrrrby
from my catarrh of the heed. I feel encouraged lo believe that II I ums K short
time longer I will be fully able to eradicate the dici of thirty ycnrV standing."
DAVID MftklSON.
ANOTPER SENSATIONAL CUREt Mr. Jacob L. Davis, Galons, 8toue county.
Mo., writes: "I luve been in bad health for thlrty-reven years, and after tak
ing twelve bottles of your Parana I am cured. "Jacob L. Ivis.
If you do not derive prompt and satisfactory renults from the tine of Peruna,
wri'e at once to lr. Ilsrtman, giving a full statement of your care and lie will
be pleaged to give you his vnluabte advice gratis.
Address Dr. Ilartniar, President of The llaitmnn Sanitarium,, Columbus, O.
Chinese Girl Slor Home.
Chinese girls as a rule are not Sent
to school ; the mother superintend
their training In housework. As soon
as the girls are old enough they are
taught to cook, sew, make and mend
clothes and Indeed do nil domestic
work. Hut the enlightened Chinese
sends his daughter to soli ml wheu near
a mission or some other school.
CITQ Iermnnly Curwt NnntinrnrrrnuiinrM
I I Id ftrr nrtilny'uiuirir.Kllit)'ii(irriit Nrv
lnwlorfr. Mfm Tiir FrrvSt'J IrlnlhoillrnndlrfWIiw.
1'r. It. a. KlliMUd.jUlArua St.. fbllxlultibla, l a.
So, Thvrvl
"Ha! You refuse me. then, proud
leauty? Well, I know your reasons?
Were I rich you would bo but too glad
to accept me."
"Mayhap, it Is even so, Itupert Fltz
goobler. I5ut by my troth you would
have to be a whole lot richer than
anybody else In the world, I'll tell you
that" Cleveland Leader.
MotBewwlll find WtmU.w'i 8oothtn
Ryrup the bent romeily toiue (or tholr chlUma
Jurlug the tu-thlng fdrlwl.
Lnr I'hlluaophr. I
Mrs. Ascum Doesn't that lazy hus
band of yours work for you at all? ,
Mrs. Jackson 'Deed, ma'am, ho say '
ho ain't gwlne tor, kuse he's a-tryln to
lib up to tho bible teachln.
Mrs. Ascutn What bible teaching?
Mrs. Jackson lie say do bible dono
tell us dat "Contentment am bettah dan
grent riches," so he des nacher'ly bound
ter be contented. Philadelphia Press.
Dr. Laurence I. Flick, an expert on
tuberculosis, is pliuining an International
convention, to be huld in Washington iu
1008.
V MT IT A TTPMnc
who goes straight to work lo curs
Hurts, Sprains, Bruise
by ths use of
Sto Jacobs Oil
and saves tlmo, money and gets out of misery quickly.
It Acts Like Magic. Price, 25c. and 50c.
18 YEARS HERE
And rtolnit dental. work a'l tli tlini' tliat la
IIih r-ciirl o lir VV. A. Win,, Inniire
Inlillnliinaiit am exiirri di'lilliilpi who r i
c.impi'tHiit to pirlorin the most loniumm
dcntiil niiHruilona. No mailer Hi nmure
ol Hie w irlt, tlieru la a iiuin here to do it.
WISE BROS., DENTISTS
UK. II. A, BTUIIDKVAXT, Speolallat oo
t'hllilren'a Teeth mill Ilgulallnn.
Ka'tlna Itldir., Th'nl and Waah'nrton Mia
s a. m. to v p. ni, Humtiij-a u to la. Ma n Vint
Work Dint on Weekly and Moathly HywtsHx
m ' -i
Vii 'teWt f i - 11 I n il.iH '
OR. W. A. WliC
THIRTY YEARS
y
.... is'W ' i
SMlttSMHim
IMwntr of Tlmo.
Tliry woro itisi-ussing tlio ennnl,
"1 don't think. nl. tun, "t!mt Hi.
low stayed down tlurt long phoukIi t
lenrn anything tilmtit roiuliilntu."
"Oh, I diiunn," mi M biioiIhtj " mna
can Rt't eiinnidornhlu bit up by tloa la
Ions Va twenty-four bourn."
A M'AIUN TKKH Cf UK KiUl I'lt.M.
ttrhlltn, til int. II ov.iint. rriitriiilliif I'lli. Inl.
ilium rt niiilKiiU. il in rt- umi inimiy if I'A.O
OlM Uf-M l I. t.iL'iirv 111 1 In U il.i, t tfk;
Tbe Wr ,r It.
The Mlsus Mary Ann, please ex
plain to me how It U th.it I saw yoi
ktssliiK a young man In tho kitcheu
last nlk'tit.
The Maid Sure, I dunno how It Is.
ma'am, unless yen were lookln
through the keyhole. Cleveland
Leader.
Thr in moro Catarrh In this iwctlnn of the
cnuniry ihnu nil utn. r itUmaei put lu-ullu'r.
ami until thn livt tow yi'urn iiti.i.-.l i.. be
liiouriUilo. 'nr i Kr.'ntniuiiy i'ril.ici.ir n.
iiounc il tt loi-sl ilfviio, kihI l.rfniTliH'illo 1
ruiituilli-a. Hint ,y o itininiitly fulling to rure
with loi'M trenttn.mt, iiroiimiiiceit ltliieurel.lu.
(ti-luni'o hai pri.v ii trrh to li a cnnMUu
tioiml (llHiane, ml t'n'rofuro requlrpt cumtliu.
tlijnal truatiiient. Hill's Catarrh Cure, tumm.
faiHurml by F. I. Clis-ney Co.,ThIoi1i, Olilu, I
th only coiintltiitliiiial euro on the market. It
In taken Internally In down from lOilropato a
tRjoti(ul. n a in directly ou tho blow! and
mill! miimrfaeeaot tbe yiitum. They oiler one
hundred dollar for nnv eaiio It lulU to euro,
bend (orclroulnra and tentlmonlftli.
Aiidresn. K. J. t I1K.NKV A CO-.TuledO, O
Bold by Hrui,'irM,7.'.c.
Uali'd family 1'IlU are the boat,
Imnitlnntton.
Randy Gritty George went tip do
road an' told all de ladles In do way
side cottages dat I once had a castle
in France an' nn automobile.
Dusty Gee! Wld sue;, a ,,,-ess ngent
as dat yer ought to git on do stage.
rn nrctn Z
X
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Y
Y
Y
V
X
X
Y
Y
Y
X
Y
X
WM'i
oa. r. p. wise.