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About The Bulletin. (Bend, OR) 1963-current | View Entire Issue (Jan. 13, 2022)
The BulleTin • Thursday, January 13, 2022 A7 DEAR ABBY Write to Dear Abby online at dearabby.com or by mail at P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069 Dear Abby: For the past three years I’ve been with a man I believe is the love of my life. Early on, he admit- ted to a porn addiction that has plagued him his entire life and sabotaged past rela- tionships. With my support, he began his first real attempt at recovery, which included a team of mental health prac- titioners. His progress over the past three years, while not linear, has been tremendous. He’s an entirely different person. I would describe our rela- tionship as 90% joyful, 10% agony (he has had four brief relapses, during which he has said incredibly hurtful things to me). I agree the cycle must be broken, and only he can do it. A week ago, he had a diffi- cult relapse and ended our re- lationship. His therapist feels he needs to be on his own to focus on recovery. While I am devastated, I agree. But I can’t understand why he’s giving up on us forever and making big decisions like get- ting off the mortgage on the house we bought less than two years ago. He swears it has nothing to do with me, and that if it weren’t for this addiction, he would spend the rest of his life with me. If his plan is to live alone, be single or celibate, and focus on recovery, why wouldn’t he also pause on major financial decisions? Why is he so completely done when there is clearly hope for recovery and reconciliation? — Broken-hearted in Oregon Dear Broken-hearted: You have involved yourself with someone who has a terrible track record when it comes to relationships. Whatever his plans for the future may be, he does not want a committed relation- ship with you, nor does he want the financial responsi- bility and the tie to you that the house represents, which is why he wants off the mort- gage. It is now time for you to start looking after your own needs and goals. If you stay busy and don’t isolate your- self, it will lessen the pain you are feeling. Dear Abby: My brother di- vorced his first wife 10 years ago. Since then, he has mar- ried a wonderful woman my family adores. The problem is, my ex-sister-in-law insists on showing up for family events, which makes these celebra- tions extremely awkward. Even her children recognize how uncomfortable her pres- ence makes everyone. I don’t mind being the “bad guy” and telling her that she’s no longer welcome at family events, but I don’t want to cause an ugly scene. How can I diplomatically (but firmly) tell her to stay away? Any suggestions would be appreciated. — Flummoxed in Philadelphia Dear Flummoxed: What a sad situation. Your BROTHER, not you, should deliver the message to his ex, well before she shows up at your next family event. He should inform her that when she shows up uninvited, her presence makes everyone uncomfortable, and it would be best that she not impose again. You could lessen the hurt by occasionally seeing her separately, depending upon the circumstances of the divorce. YOUR HOROSCOPE By Georgia Nicols Stars show the kind of day you’ll have dynaMiC | POsiTiVe | aVeraGe | sO-sO | diFFiCulT MOON ALERT: There are no restrictions to shopping or important deci- sions today. The Moon is in Gemini. HAPPY BIRTHDAY FOR THURSDAY, JAN. 13, 2022: you are focused and driven to achieve what you want to do. you are smart, hard- working and organized. This allows you to accomplish a lot. This is a quieter, slower-paced year with a stronger focus on partnerships and close friend- ships. Take time out for yourself to focus on your needs. ARIES (March 21-April 19) Conversations with your daily contacts are important to you to- day. you won’t take them casually. you want something real and genuine to take place, not superficial chitchat about the weather. (although, lately, the weather is not that superficial.) Tonight: Make plans. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) you have money on your mind today. This is why you might be fo- cused on your possessions. you might want to clean something, repair it or take care of it in some way. you might feel possessive and resistant to lending something to someone. Tonight: Be thrifty. GEMINI (May 21-June 20) Today the Moon is in your sign, which will make you more emotional than usual. however, the upside is this: For two days every month when the Moon is in your sign, your luck slightly improves! Try it. ask the uni- verse for a favor. Tonight: Be practical. CANCER (June 21-July 22) Today you prefer to play things low-key or work behind the scenes because it feels better. you feel more comfortable. safer. (you like to have a warm feeling in your tummy.) stay out of the limelight. Find a cubbyhole to do your work. Tonight: research. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) Today your interactions with friends and groups are more im- portant. a conversation with a friend might be significant. Perhaps this person will spur you to reassess your future goals. you also might give further thought to your relationship to a group. (“are these my people?”) Tonight: Get advice. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) For two days every month, the Moon sits at the top of your chart, which calls attention to you. in particular, bosses, parents and the police no- tice you more than usual. (hmmm, good to know.) eyes are on you today, so be aware in case you have to do some damage control. Tonight: listen. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) Today you long to travel or do something to expand your hori- zons. you’re hungry for life, adventure and exciting experiences! if you can travel, by all means, do so. Go someplace you’ve never been before. shake things up a little. Tonight: learn something. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) Today your emotional experiences are more intense than usual. For example, you might attract people to you who are powerful and intense. Possibly, you desire something that belongs to someone else. you might feel envious or jealous. (We’ve all been there.) Tonight: Check your finances. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Because the Moon today is directly opposite your sign, it means you will turn your attention to your most personal relationships: spouses, close friends and partners. you might be a bit needy. Conflicts will be more emo- tional. Guard against knee-jerk reactions. Tonight: Take a moment to think things through. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) Very likely, you will have to set aside some part of your day to per- form a service for someone, do a favor for them or work on their behalf. This doesn’t mean you’re being a martyr. it’s just what’s happening. you also might give more thought to your health or a pet today. Tonight: Work. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) This is a playful, fun-loving day! you want to play and socialize with others. sports events, fun activities with kids, social outings, movies, the theater, long lunches and dinners with friends will be great choices. romance might make your heart go pitter-patter. Tonight: Teach. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) Today you will be happy to cocoon at home and relax among familiar surroundings because it feels good. you also will welcome an op- portunity to do some navel gazing and take stock of your life and what’s happening at the moment. (it’s good to check in now and then.) Tonight: listen to family. TODAY IN HISTORY By The Associated Press Today is Thursday, Jan. 13, the 13th day of 2022. There are 352 days left in the year. Today’s Highlight in History: in 2021, President donald Trump was impeached by the u.s. house over the violent Jan. 6 siege of the Capitol on a charge of “incitement of insurrection,” becoming the only president to be twice impeached. in 1733, James Oglethorpe and some 120 english colonists arrived at Charleston, south Carolina, while en route to settle in pres- ent-day Georgia. in 1794, President George Wash- ington approved a measure add- ing two stars and two stripes to the american flag, following the admission of Vermont and Ken- tucky to the union. in 1898, emile Zola’s famous de- fense of Capt. alfred dreyfus, “J’accuse,” was published in Paris. in 1941, a new law went into effect granting Puerto ricans u.s. birth- right citizenship. novelist and poet James Joyce died in Zurich, swit- zerland, less than a month before his 59th birthday. in 1982, an air Florida 737 crashed into Washington, d.C.’s 14th street Bridge and fell into the Poto- mac river while trying to take off during a snowstorm, killing a total of 78 people, including four motor- ists on the bridge. in 1987, West German police ar- rested Mohammed ali hamadi, a suspect in the 1985 hijacking of a TWa jetliner and the killing of a u.s. navy diver who was on board. in 1990, l. douglas Wilder of Vir- ginia became the nation’s first elected Black governor as he took the oath of office in richmond. in 1992, Japan apologized for forc- ing tens of thousands of Korean women to serve as sex slaves for its soldiers during World War ii, cit- ing newly uncovered documents that showed the Japanese army had had a role in abducting the so- called “comfort women.” in 2000, Microsoft chairman Bill Gates stepped aside as chief ex- ecutive and promoted company president steve Ballmer to the position. in 2001, an earthquake estimated by the u.s. Geological survey at magnitude 7.7 struck el salvador; more than 840 people were killed. in 2011, a funeral was held in Tuc- son, arizona, for 9-year-old Chris- tina Taylor Green, the youngest victim of a mass shooting that also claimed five other lives and critically wounded rep. Gabrielle Giffords. in 2020, at a royal family summit in england, Queen elizabeth ii bro- kered a deal to secure the future of the monarchy; it would allow Prince harry and his wife, Meghan, to live part-time in Canada. Ten years ago: The italian luxury liner Costa Concordia ran aground off the Tuscan island of Giglio and flipped onto its side; 32 people were killed. Five years ago: Federal prose- cutors in detroit announced that Takata Corp. had agreed to plead guilty to a single criminal charge and pay $1 billion in fines and res- titution for concealing a deadly defect in its air bag inflators. lord snowdon, the society photogra- pher and filmmaker who married Britain’s Princess Margaret and continued to mix in royal circles even after their divorce, died in london at age 86. One year ago: Five-time Olympic swimming medalist Klete Keller was charged with participating in the deadly riot at the u.s. Capitol after video emerged that appeared to show him among those storm- ing the building. The u.s. govern- ment carried out its first execution of a female inmate in nearly seven decades; a Kansas woman, lisa Montgomery, who strangled an expectant mother in Missouri and cut the baby from her womb, re- ceived a lethal injection at a federal prison complex in indiana. sieg- fried Fischbacher, part of the en- tertainment duo siegfried and roy who performed in las Vegas with their famed white tigers, died at 81. Today’s Birthdays: actor Frances sternhagen is 92. TV personal- ity nick Clooney is 88. Comedian Charlie Brill is 84. actor Billy Gray is 84. actor richard Moll is 79. rock musician Trevor rabin is 68. r&B musician Fred White is 67. rock musician James loMenzo (Mega- deth) is 63. actor Kevin anderson is 62. actor Julia louis-dreyfus is 61. rock singer Graham “suggs” McPherson (Madness) is 61. Coun- try singer Trace adkins is 60. actor Penelope ann Miller is 58. actor Patrick dempsey is 56. actor su- zanne Cryer is 55. actor Traci Bing- ham is 54. actor Keith Coogan is 52. TV producer-writer shonda rhimes is 52. actor nicole eggert is 50. ac- tor ross McCall is 46. actor Michael Pena is 46. actor Orlando Bloom is 45. Meteorologist Ginger Zee (TV: “Good Morning america”) is 41. ac- tor ruth Wilson is 40. actor Julian Morris is 39. actor Beau Mirchoff is 33. actor liam hemsworth is 32. nhl center Connor Mcdavid is 25. “(South Salem is) usually the team that wins the league, so to start out league play with a win over the projected top team in the league was fun to do. We just played as a team, which is what we need to do every game.” Mountain View Continued from A5 Sophomore Kasey Booster found fellow sophomore Avery Andrews under the basket to take the lead with 15 seconds left, then Booster put the game out of reach with a pair of free throws in the closing seconds. It was Mountain View’s first win over South Salem since the two schools joined the MVC in 2018. (The teams did not play each other during the short- ened season last spring.) The Saxons won by an average of 25 points in the four previous matchups. “They are usually the team that wins the league, so to start out league play with a win over the projected top team in the league was fun to do,” said Booster, who scored 24 points including all 12 of the Cou- gars’ points in the first quarter. “It was stressful, but we did a really good job of picking each other up and giving each other energy. We just played as a team, which is what we need to do every game.” The Cougars thus far this season have been a composed group despite being relatively young. The starting lineup Tuesday night included just one senior in Angelina Glasser, Outdoors Continued from A5 Mountain whitefish have a subterminal mouth, which helps them feed on a variety of food items on the bottom of streams such as immature — Kasey Booster, Mountain View girls basketball player Brian rathbone/The Bulletin Mountain View’s Angelina Glasser shoots a layup during the Cou- gars’ win over South Salem Tues- day night at Mountain View High. one junior in Allie Neet, and three sophomores in Ruby Haarberg, Booster and An- drews. Mountain View also has a new coach this season. Corbett — who spent nearly a decade as an assistant coach at Moun- tain View prior to coaching the Redmond boys team — took over for Megan Dickerson, who led the program the previ- ous four seasons. “We all went in with a pos- mayflies, stoneflies and cad- disflies, which the Deschutes River has in abundance. “We have known for a long time that the Lower Deschutes River has an abundance of mountain whitefish, which anglers frequently catch while itive mindset,” Booster said. “We thought that even though we were having a new coaching staff, it doesn’t mean we can’t be a winning team with a good record.” When Corbett stopped coaching after the 2015-16 sea- son at Redmond, he thought his time leading a program had come to an end. “I wasn’t sure I was going to be a head coach again,” Corbett said. “It has been a great start to the year and I can’t complain about that.” MVC play will continue for Mountain View Thursday night at Summit. e Reporter: 541-383-0307, brathbone@bendbulletin.com angling for trout,” said Jason Seals, ODFW Deschutes Dis- trict fish biologist. “However, we never suspected that the Deschutes could have the state and possible world-record mountain whitefish, so this was a great surprise.” Simons Continued from A5 McCollum has missed 15 games after suffering a col- lapsed lung and is now await- ing the birth of his first child. Portland is also without fellow starters Norman Powell be- cause of COVID-19 protocols and Larry Nance Jr. because of right knee inflammation. Simons is hardly alone among the league’s young play- ers who have been garnering more minutes as coronavirus cases spike. Miami’s Omer Yurtseven, 23, has had double-digit re- bounds in his last 11 games and was the first NBA player this season to have four con- secutive games with at least 16 rebounds heading into Wednesday night’s game against Atlanta. He’s been get- ting more playing time while Bam Adebayo and Dewayne Dedmon are both hurt. “I think everybody’s see- ing it this year, probably more so than any other year ever in the NBA, is that young guys are getting opportunities and they’re taking big-time advan- tage of it,” Sacramento Kings interim coach Alvin Gentry said. “You look at a kid like Simons, who everybody feels like is a good player. As to how good that is? Well, if you play on a team with the two back- court players (the Blazers) have here, there’s just not a whole lot of time for you to play. So now that he’s got extended minutes, you can see what he can do.” Craig Mitchelldyer/aP Portland Trail Blazers’ Anfernee Simons, left, dribbles around Atlanta Hawks’ Clint Capela during the second half Jan. 3 in Portland. One of the pitfalls of taking over the starting job, and ca- pably performing in it, is that defenses are now keying in on Simons. “I’m learning every single game, playing through mis- takes, trying to be aggressive in certain areas. I know a lot of teams are going to start throw- ing me a lot of attention,” Si- mons said. “Just being prepared for that and know how to counter it. I think I’m handling it pretty well.” Simons is in his fourth sea- son in the league. He was a first-round draft pick by the Blazers in 2018 out of the IMG Academy in Florida. When he moved into the backup point guard role ahead of last sea- son, Lillard wholeheartedly en- dorsed him, saying: “I believe in Ant.” “They just want me to play my game. Everybody’s say- ing shoot the ball, make plays, and everybody’s giving me the confidence to do that,” Simons said. “So it makes it much eas- ier. I’m not going into the game worrying about the burden that’s on my shoulder, or the weight that’s on my shoulder.”
