Newberg graphic., April 08, 1909, Image 3

Rid of Spring Humors
impure or effete matter« accumulated in the blood during the winter
eaoee in the spring euch disfiguring and painful troubles as boils, pimples,
and other eruption«, also weakness, lose of'appetite, that tired feeling.
Sentad to-day to the guests o f the W ol­
cott and U w ill be tbs’ Initial presepta-
The beet mediehte to take is H o o d ’s Barasparilla, which thoroughly
cleanses the blood, and effects permanent cures by giving healthy funo-
Q fite £©i\\\y
tional activity to the stomach, liver, kidneys, bowels and skin.
H o o d ’s Sarsaparilla effects its wonderful cures, not simply beeause it
eontains sarsaparilla, but beeause it combines the utmost remedial values
o f more than 20 different ingredients, each greatly strengthened snd en­
riched by this peculiar Combination. These ingredients are the very rem­
edies that successful physicians prescribe fo r the same diseases snd ail­
ments. There is no real substitute fo r H oo d’s Sarsaparilla. I f urged to
buy any preparation said to he “ just as good,” you may be sure it is in­
ferior, costs lees to make, end yields the dealer a larger profit.
Begin.taking H o o d ’s Sarsaparilla today, in the usual liquid form o r in
the chocolated tablets known as Ssrsatsbs. 100 Doses One Dollar.
Nan— Well, there’s one thing aboet
lack, anyhow. He speaks right out what
ho thinks. Yon always know where to
find him.
Faa— That’s so. I nearly always find
him hare when I come.
“ Hiss Pinnule, may I — er— call on
yon?"
“ No, indeed, sir; yon have known me
six months, and yoo'vo never sent ate a
picture postcard.”
One o a U n d o H ires*.
O nly One
IMO Q U IN IN E ”
C ity Niece— W ell, Uncle Hiram, how
that is LAXATIVE BROMO QUININE. Look did you enjoy tbe tea with tbe slices o f
Sor «ho slanature of E. W. GROVE. Used ths
lemon In K?
world ever to Cure a Cold in Ona Dav. tSe.
Uncle H iram — Tea? Gosh, g a ll I
W h o r e the T ro u b le W a s .
thought that was pure out-and-out cir­
"O ld chap, why don’t you make up your cus lemonade.
mind to marry and settle down?"
“ Yon chump, it takes two minds to dp
Pete de Pickpocket— W ot ye lookin’ at
that, and I haven’t quite got FredaSi
mind made np yet.” — Chicago Tribune.
that paper fur?
W atty de Winder Smaeher— I want to
find out whuther them di’ monde I lifted
out o* that plate glaaa front las’ night is
wuth |S or 15,000.— Chicago Tribuna ,
CASTOR
IA
lor Infants and Children.
Tfct KM Y ob Han Always Bought
' *T never was so shocked in my life,*
said Mrs. Lapsling.
“ Peerley Winter
green U trying.to get a divorce from h «
husband. She says she has found out
that they made a mistake when they wen
married: he isn’ t her real infinitive.“
M e tis s r .
The octopus* appetite clamored for pulp
Over the country he hnngrily strode.
Ho swalldwed a forest or two at a gulp
And picked bis teeth with the fork
o f tbe road.
— Chicago Tribune.
from the East and Middle W est
and can place you in touch with
buyers with money.
Let-us h ea r w h a t you have fo r sale
ATLAS LAND COMPANY
OREGON
It W ill
Cost You
tpmrttoos for samples of the
i l l mitts over produced,
farm to rear exact asssar*.
TOWER’S FISH BRAND
V * l VW \ V WATERPROOr
I'SsS& fc O IL E D
L v **S \ garments
^GlfT-DURAHf-aiM
jOUARANICQ^UiitPfiOff
kv S U I T S * 3 8 2
SUCKERS *3 —
V
E ta 4 Sewva
says. Th e management has been Im­
pressed fo r three or four mouths w ith
tbe general untidiness o f waiters, bell­
boys and other employee exclusive o f
the clerical staff and yesterday tbe fa l­
lowing pronunciamento was Issued:
“ Beginning on this date every em­
ploye o f tbe W olcott who comes lu
contact with tbe guests o f tbe botri
w ill report d aily to klias Cora M. P a r­
ker, the official manicure, to bave his
or ber finger nails dipped, cleaned,
polished and filed.
“ T h is order Is mandatory and no ex­
cuse w ill be accepted fo r disobedience
except Illness or other excuse which
tbe management «h a ll deem to be rea­
sonable. SRj
“ A room has been provided fo r the
manicure near the
waiters' dressing
room, and she w ill be on duty from
8:80 a. in until 6 p. in.
“ No charge w ill be
made fo r tbe
service, which.tends to promote cleanli­
ness and
which w ill appeal to tbe
guests o f the hotel. There Is no rea­
son why tbe finger nails should not re­
ceive the same attention as the hands.’’
Tbe promulgation o f tbe edict was
follow ed by two w aiters making Im­
mediate application ‘ fo r treatment—
Serath Carro# and Antlpolus Choganoa.
Carro# has a large hand w ith spa tu­
la ted fingers caused by close attention
to tbe strings o f a violin and to bal­
ancing salvers on his finger tip s CUn­
gano# has a long, slender hand, with
oval n a ils Bach candidate was polish­
ed o ff In ten minutes.
“ Fine,” said Carrot. " I like him.
Th e yonnga lade, she very nice. Don’ t
hurt, Just a little tickle.**
Wit of the Youngsters
T h ere A r e B i M f M e u .
Some necemary things, you’ll note,
Can never be done by rule.
You caa’t loam how to milk a goat
A t a correspondence school.
cwWve bowcVs, c\eos\se&
\\ve system
;
A s s is t e o w m o v a s o n u n g
p w w a T v e w jy
etVfe bewejvcvoX
»always buy tW
■ V a s a tla le d U a f i a s .
“ I ’ve often thought,“
Mrs. Lapsling
was saying, “ I should love to see that
erouderfnl atmospheric freenomenon they
call the garage in the desert.”
About 75,000 fox skins are sold out of
Heine every year. Very few of the aly
animals are shot. Many are killed by the
us- of poisoned bait, while hundreds are
killed in drives.
■ to
C laim
te
D totlaetiea.
The rising atatsaman oa his wadding
tour waa revisiting tha scenes o f his
childhood.
“ T h is my dear,” he said to hU bride,
“ Is tha old homestead where I was born.
Do yon see that ancient log cabin?"
“Yes”
‘‘You have no idea what st range emo­
tions fill me when I look at that little
cabin, klyrtilla. I — I wasn't born in it,
yon know."
g l e e . Sea A m en ities.
The shark was reviling the skate.
. "Y ou ’re such a cheap eual” said the
shark.
“ Worse than that," sighed the akatr '
M a k in . fa r B treavth.
Bacon— Experiments with sugar u
doesn’t matter.
W e are w illin g t#
food made in the French army hav«
move anywhere yon want to go.
shown that it is a great source o f m u»
R s t h ls a D e S a lte .
cular energy.
Tha detect I ts waa trying to get a dew.
Egbert— I guess that Is a fa c t Jual
“ When your husband left you,"
he
see bow strong the sugar trust la.—
•aid. “ flld ha drop any intimation as to
Yonkers Statesman.
wbera ha might ba going?"
"N o, sir." answarad tha sharp ck taxed,
r s l l r to Bo w is e .
thin lipped woman. "A ll ha arid was
“ I ’ m not going to give my non a col­
that ha wanted to get away, that he was
going to get away, and he didn’ t c u e a lege education,” observed n fellow wh«
dura »there ha w en t"— Chicago Tribune. won’t let oa print his unme, “ becaus*
I wont him to get on rapidly. I lost
the first Job I ever had by undertaking
So correct my employer’s gram m ar."
9
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■ ■ -
-
— -
-
-
You may any your financial Judg­
ment is pretty good i f you are wise
enough not to risk it bucking tbe stock
market or board o f trade.
(«set nr
C resi Cl: i \ i
BAKlINI¡TPOWDER
"1"
Egg-Phocphat»
nu DO MI
TUT AST
fOWMt WU
:iMH0 PDWCi’ C»*"» A FULL POUND 2Sc-
D07NTIK
m
c
«£ .* ¿ £ 2 ,
Pettit*a Eye Salva fo r 2 0 c
elievea tired o r overw orked eyes,
tope eye aches, congested, inflamed
r sore eyes. A u druggists or H ow ard
tros., Buffalo, N . Y .
.G olden
W est
C O FFEEt
T E A SPIC ES
BAKING POWDER
PUTNAM
T h e "D e a th B a t t o a " A M s to the
•a h sva r T r a v e le r 's S eeerttp.
S afety In railroad travel is a vitally
interesting topic, and an article in the
Circle, .entitled,
“ Making
Railroad
Travel Safer,” gives some remarkable
illustrations o f the many Inventions
and automatic appliances which tend
to guard tbe pqbllc from danger,. Out
o f these is called tbe “ death button,”
making provision as it does In case of
the sudden death or in activity o f tbt
one In charge at the moment on line»
where electric current baa been in­
stalled as a propelling power.
Th e well-known "“ denth button," now
In use In the Manhattan subway trains
is a safety device la line w ith this fu­
ture development
In tbe top o f the electric control lei
handle, which is moved^in a circle ovet
a row o f contact buttons by tbe m otor
man when he regulates the speed. Is a
little plunger which -to -the- real- fac­
tor In throwing the electric current ofl
and on. It sticks through ffifi^handlt
aud I* held up by a spring. * *
Before ho can get any curasfit at all
this button must be pushed down by
the palm o f the motorman’s band, aftet
which he can move the handle about
and adjust the strength o f the current-1
st w ill.
But should he drop dead at his roet,
or fo r any reason remove his hand
from the lever, tbe little button would
■print up from contact, the . current
would leave the motors and the caj
atop.
ere infectad or "oxposod.” L quid, siren
B ood and Glanda, espala tha po'
tamper la Doss and Sharp and i
stock remedy. Curas Lo C ’
nay ramedy. She and ft a
K s* and «10 a
It. Show to your druaalst
win set it for
In case o f accidents, cuts, wounds, barns,
Scald*, sprains, bruin *, etc., nothing will
so quickly take awav all pain and soreness
as Hamlins Wizard O.L
“ and I ’m very proud o f you." "W e ll,"
Th e Old Mao— Sir, I was violently
continued tbe little fellow , “ I can gc
opposed to the match.
to bed without saying my prayers,
Th e Young Man— I know i t — Cleve­
land Leader.
usual time, so Clifford sa id : ’Mamma
says I must never ask fo r anything tc
eat, but I ’m a w fu lly hungry, Just the
sa m e”
DISTEMPER »
An estimate by the geological survey
/
places the country's production of Port- / '
land cement in 1006 st 40,000,000 barrels, f ( J
a decrease from 1907 of nearly 20 per l-r|
cent.
W
"A n d remember, dear,” said small
"A m
F red’s mother, “ that George Washing- Without
ton never told a lie.” “ Ota, w ell," re- e f Engli
Joined Fred, “ he hadn’t any the best
“ No,"
"N ow that wo’ re to be under civil see-
‘Toit l
vice,” said the crossroads postmaster, o f me. I never told owe, either.”
Teacher— Now, H arry, suppose I had
’ and I may have to take an examination
wuw day, I ’d better be picking up all a mince pie .and gave one-sixth to
------
tbe Information I can.”
Johnny, one^sixth to Tomm y, one-
Thereupon he proceeded to read all the sixth to W illie and took h alf o f it m y­
postal cards.— Chicago Tribune.
s e lf; w hat would be left?
H arry
(p rom p tly) — I would.
. •
W h a t C oal# She D e l
Tbe Young Man— I wish to thank
“ Mamma,” said 0-year-old Edgar one
you. sir, fo r giving me your assistance evening, “ haven't I been a good boy
in persuading your daughter to m arry to-day?”
“ Yea, E dgar," she replied,
H e K xplataa.
“ W hy is It, professor,” asked the young
man with the bad eye, “ that when Chris­
topher Columbus discovered this country
be didn’t eettle down and stay here?"
“ Doubtless yon are aware, my young
friend." answered tbe professor, "that the
Spaaish form of his name was Chrlateral
Coloa.”
“ Yea. sir.’
“ Well, a colon doaa net mean a (nil
atop. W e will return now, young gentle­
men, to the consideration of tha isaaon."
— Chicago Tribuns.
<■ (k * ■ « • ( • ( ( • ftaa>.
The Girl ( pzmiug her (air band over
hie brow )— There, A rth u r! Hare 1
charmed your headache away?
Arthur— Tea hare, dear I You’ re mj
t " I w as tro u b le d w ith cram ps in the
watch Haaell
stom ach f o r six years. I tried many
kinds o f m edicin e, also was tm ated
by th ree doctors.
" T h e y said that I had nervous dys­
pepsia.
i took tha m edicine fo r tw o
T h e Preieeeer.
years,
then
I gp t sick again and gave
The Doctor— 1 can’ t help feeling sorry
for n y friend Huddle ford.
lie owned up e ll hopes w f g e ttin g Cured*
unite an estenehre chain of golf parka,
" I saw a testim on ial o f a man whose
dud he’s Jnet gone Into bankruptcy.
case was sim ila r to m ine, b ein g cured
The Professor— I one; hie chain wae no
by Para n a , so thou gh t I w ou ld g iv o it
s'ronger than hie weakest links.— Chicago
a tria l. I procured a b o ttle at once,
Tribune.
and com m enced ta k in g it.
" I have taken n in eteen bottles, end
am en tirely cured. I b elie v e Peruna
is e ll that is d a im o d fo r it .’ ’ — M rs. «1.
C . Jam ison, 01 M erchant 8 t., Watson,
Amateur Dramatist— Well, yoo’ve sees vid e, C al.
my play. Tell me what you tkink of it.
Dramatic Critic— I will. I ’ ll give you
Mine straight talk.
Amateur Dramatist— Straight
talk?
Great Scott!
Are yon going to draw
the deadly parallel on me?
Parlln ft Orendorff Co., Canton, III.
FADELESS
DYES
PRESIDENT TAFT’S
WHITE STEAMER