U. S. SENATOR FROM SOUTH CAROLINA
Recommends Pe-ru-na
For Dyspepsia and Stomach Trouble
Mother Goldfish— Where hare yon
boon, W illie T WUUo—Only Joet around
the globe, ma.— Ohicago News.
Bmellne— Baza and I can hardly un
derstand each othgr orer the telephone.
Edgar— W ell, talk one at a tim e
“ K now hlm? I should u y so! W e
are huabanda-in-law.n “ Eh?" “ Our
w ires w ere divorced from the same
at O ther
Has
These Rem edies Do N ot Reach the
Seat o f the D ifficu lty, W hich
Is R eally Catarrh.
“ She told me that I might hope.“
“ B etter look out! I'v e known girls to
say that when they intended to accept
a chap.” — Puck.
“ Smith has lost his Job, an4 Pm
hustling to get him another.“ “ You
are*
“ Yes. I ow e him ten dollars,
and Fm afraid he’ll be needing I t “ —
Pack.
f
.
Stranger—Seems to me this crowd
ed street is a Queer place for a hospi
Bean the Signature of
tal. N ative—W ell, I don’t know. T w o
trolley lines m eet here.—N ew York
W eekly.
“ H ow did you get your black eye.
Sambo?“ ' “ W ell, boss, yer see I waa
out a-lookln’ fe r trouble, and dls 'ere
eye was de fast to find I t ” — Yonkers
Statesman.
Philanthropist— Why did yon change
the title o f “ T h e Ladles’ Home” to
“ Old Ladles' Hom e” ? Mrs. Du Goods
— f t was becoming too crowded.— N ew
York W eekly.
H e who is guilty of equivocation may
Cotton exports for 1908 were 9378,*
Parker—W e’ r e moved again. Barker
well be suspected of hypocrisy.— Maun- 000,000; more than a million dollars a
— You have? Parker—Yes; the chil
day.
dren w ere so noisy that w e couldn’t
stand w hat the neighbors said about
them.— D etroit Free Frees.
Yeung lady— I can always tell your
work the instant I
artist (delighted)— C in you, really?
Young lady— Easily. The women all
look alike.— New York Weekly.
“ W oman Is naturally o f a clinging
nature,” observed he. “Yea,” rejoined
his w ife, “ but she isn’t to be compar
ed w ith a man when It comes to hold
ing on to a 95 bill.” — New Yorker.
Sam Shinbone—Fse
thlnkin’ ob
m arrying dat youngest Jackson gaL
Mose Johnson— Don’t do It, nigger—
|on’t do I t W hy, (lat gal never kep’
a Job fo r over tw o weeks In her life.—
Ex.
Prospective Benedict—Are yon w ill
ing to become everything or nothing
for my sake?
Prospective Bride—
Yea, i f yon leave out the “ nothing“
part o f the proposition.— Baltim ore
American.
*
“ B ring, me some coffee,“ said Mr.
Nurox. as he finished his dessert
“ Demi-tasse?" inquired the waiter.
“ Sure, I f that’s the best you g o t end
say, bring- one o* them little pots fu ll
of i t ” — Philadelphia Press.
“ You are always more or less skep
tical about what you aee In p rin t”
“ Yea,” answered the man who baa his
own Ideas about things. “ Truth may
be at the bottom of a w ell, but it isn’t
an ink w ell.” — Washington Star.
Husband (o f popular author)— Do
you mean to M l me, doctor, that my
w ife la Insane? Doctor— No. not ao
bad as th a t but she ^ h op elessly fool
Husband— W ell, that’ s a relief.
a ish.
I was afraid her usefulness as a w riter
is was impaired— Life.
A prison visitor recently asked one
o f the prisoners how he came to be
L yd ia E* Pinfcham 's Vegetable Compounds there. “ W ant,” was the answer.
« D ear M tul PnncHAsc:— Ignorance and neglect are the canse of “ H ow was th at pray?" “ W ell, 1 want
untold female suffering, not only with the laws of health but with the ed another man’s watch. H e wasn’t
of a cure. I did not heed the warnings of headaches, organic w illin g I shotUd have I t and the Judge
rm.lnn, and general weariness, nntil I was well mgh prostrated. I knew I wants me to stay here five years.” —
had to do something. Happily I did the right thing. I took Lydia E . Tit-Bits.
BA-M inAlVK
and was rewarded in a few weeks to find that my aches and pains dis
appeared, and I again felt the glow of health through my body. Sinoe
I have been w ell I have been more careful, I have also advised a number
o f my sick friends to take Lydia E . Pinkham ’s Vegetable Com
pound, end they have never had reason to be sorry. Yours very truly,
Mug. M a t F a i r b a n k s , 216 South 7th S t, Minneapolis, M inn." (M rs. Fair-
s. P i n k h a m :— F o r over two years
re than tongue can express with
idder trouble. M y physician pro
trouble catarrh o f the bladder,
il&oement of the womb. I had a
re to urinate, and it was very pain-
is of blood would pass w ith the
bad backache very often,
riting to you, and receiving your
itter, I followed your advice, and
L ittle W illie, who is a Philadelphia
boy, bad been watching a dog chasing
his tail fo r three mlnntee. “ Papa,” he
asked, “ what kind of a dog la that?”
“ T h a t” wild the father, “ la a watch
dog.”
W illie was silent a moment
“ W ell,” be Anally said, “ from the time
he takes to wind him self up I guess
be must be a W aterbary watch dog.”
— Philadelphia Ledger.
•
Mrs. Househunter—This bouse does
not seem to be very substantially b u ilt
Even the floor shakes when w e walk
on i t Agent— But, madam, thla floor
is— er—the very latest thing In spring
dancing floors. All the newest honses
have them. Mrs. Househunter— And
the stairs creak terribly. Agent— Oh.
w e don’t make any extra charge for
those
patent
burglar-alarm stairs,
m id im .— Chicago News.
Dick— Say— seen a letter o f mine
lying around, gray envelope? Sweep
M ops making the bed)— Do you mean
a letter starting off, “ Dearest Dickie,”
and asking you to come down and
spend Sunday, and telling you bow
lonely she has been all the week, and
ending up, “ Your own little Gladys” ?
Dick— Y e—ts. Sweep (going on mak
ing the bed)— Then It’s in yonr top
chifloaisr drawer.— Tale Record.
m. U OUILUK.
I f you do not derive prom pt and sat
isfactory results from the use of Pera
na, w rite at once to Dr. Hartman, g iv
ing a fu ll statement of your case, and
he w ill be pleased to give you his val
uable advice gratis.
Address D r. Hartman, President of
The Hartman Sanitarium , Columbus,
Ohio.
Apply to NATHAN BICKFORD, »14 P St.
hundred to wun ovah to Lnnnon?
Washington, D. c. 6 th N. H. Vols., 1*61-66.
F a ta « •What’s the object?
“ Golf.
“ Good! I f you learn how to play golf,
“ Oh, I don’t want to play It. I want
to learn how to pwonownee it.”
W E W ANT
AGENTS
$150 and up per
month to ener-
^
" town in Oregon
Washington and Idaho. Dignified, hon
orable, permanent and immensely profit
able employment at home or on the
road; something new; send stamp or
call at office for details.
SQUARE DEAL BROKERAGE CO.
129 Seventh Street,
Portland, Oregon
CURE Horses
of
HEAVES,
Diatesnper, Pink B j t o r Indigestion. A great BLOOD PURIFIER ARB CO I
MTIOHCa and a sure care for all ailments from which heaves arise.
C U R K D 9 A M O9 9 9 9 .
I t o r . kam using Prassten H w n Powder, the p u t right month* and In that Um« ha,
s in d || hors— o f B a n s . 14 o f Distemper tad 0 o f Chronic Cough. Tbs Premia
■ tm .iUn k in gelnsS a great lepnteMos ln täte ttsB aa—B rass Sshncks, »«w a sh ,» . 1
PRICK! A T DKALMUS, M et BY M A IL , SO*
warning * symptoms; will soon ? prostrate
‘woman. She thinks womans ^safeguard
Footlnltt (energetically helping at
basaar)— W on’t you put In for a ralfie
for this cushion?
V isitor— Ch. no,
thanksl
Footlnltt—O f coarse, It’s
rather useless and gaudy, and so forth;
and personally I think the design’ s
rotten. But do put In fo r It l V isitor— '
No. thanksl I made lt l— Punch.
E z U . 8. Senator M . 0 . Bntler, from
Sooth Carolina, was senator from that
state for two terms. In a recent letter
to The Perana Medicine Co., from
Washington, D. C ., says:
••I can recomm end Perana tor dys*
sta and stomach trouble. I have
a using y ou r m edicine fo r a short
period and I fe e l v e ry much relieved.
It la indeed a wonderful m edicine be
sides a good tonic.” —M . C. B utler.
The only rational nay to cure dys
pepsia is to remove the catarrh. P e
rana cores catarrh. Parana does not
produce artificial digestion. I t cores
catarrh and leaves the stomach to per
form digestion in a natural way. This
is vastly better and safer than resorting
to artificial methods or narcotics.
Perana has cored more cases of dys
pepsia than ail other remedies com
bined, sim ply because'it cores catarrh
wherever located. I f catarrh is locat
ed in the head, Perana cures i t . . I f
catarrh has fastened itself in the throat
or bronchial tubes, Parana cares it.
When catarrh becomes settled in the
stomach, Perana cares it, as w ell in
this location as in any other.
Perana is not sim ply a remedy for
dyspepsia. Perana is a catarrh remedy.
Perana cares dyspepsia because it is
generally dependent opon catarrh.
K
In Use For Over 3 0 Years.
Pinkham ’s Vegetable Compound faithfully, according to directions,
D igestive R ei
Been Invented
r i B i v h v u u i d an a v o u i u u i i u u u g . a u u
lu u ru
•re various kinds of it. Many plates never
were right. Others are properly made, bat
the mouth la not put in proper condition
tor wearing the plate.
W
,.j ,
*
a
n
If yonr platoa are In an;
we* will be gled to mate an examination
d
tell you the cause of trouble.
We extract teeth wholly without pain and
nil work is at lower than reasonable rates.
H H H H H H I H H Extracting free when platee or bridges are
i>tL M. A. « u s
ordered.
’ISE BROS., Dentists
Open evening till •
u a i. r. m - ,
*—
Sundays from » to 13
Oregon, Main 'MJtt
mmsmm
W rite fo r Catalogue and P rices
IV E B ETTER satisfaction than
anything on the market at any
thing like the price, because they
are made of good material to stand
“ Oregon roads” —iron corners on bodies,
braces on shafts, heavy second growth
wheels, screwed rims.
G
ttltS ttt
I f yon want to feel sure that yon are
getting yonr money’s worth, ask for a
“ Bee Line” or a M itchell Buggy.
WE GUARANTEE THEM.