U. S. SENATOR FROM SOUTH CAROLINA
Recommends Pe-ru-na
For Dyspepsia and Stomach Trouble
Mother Goldfish— Where hare yon
boon, W illie T WUUo—Only Joet around
the globe, ma.— Ohicago News.
Bmellne— Baza and I can hardly un­
derstand each othgr orer the telephone.
Edgar— W ell, talk one at a tim e
“ K now hlm? I should u y so! W e
are huabanda-in-law.n “ Eh?" “ Our
w ires w ere divorced from the same
at O ther
Has
These Rem edies Do N ot Reach the
Seat o f the D ifficu lty, W hich
Is R eally Catarrh.
“ She told me that I might hope.“
“ B etter look out! I'v e known girls to
say that when they intended to accept
a chap.” — Puck.
“ Smith has lost his Job, an4 Pm
hustling to get him another.“ “ You
are*
“ Yes. I ow e him ten dollars,
and Fm afraid he’ll be needing I t “ —
Pack.
f
.
Stranger—Seems to me this crowd­
ed street is a Queer place for a hospi­
Bean the Signature of
tal. N ative—W ell, I don’t know. T w o
trolley lines m eet here.—N ew York
W eekly.
“ H ow did you get your black eye.
Sambo?“ ' “ W ell, boss, yer see I waa
out a-lookln’ fe r trouble, and dls 'ere
eye was de fast to find I t ” — Yonkers
Statesman.
Philanthropist— Why did yon change
the title o f “ T h e Ladles’ Home” to
“ Old Ladles' Hom e” ? Mrs. Du Goods
— f t was becoming too crowded.— N ew
York W eekly.
H e who is guilty of equivocation may
Cotton exports for 1908 were 9378,*
Parker—W e’ r e moved again. Barker
well be suspected of hypocrisy.— Maun- 000,000; more than a million dollars a
— You have? Parker—Yes; the chil­
day.
dren w ere so noisy that w e couldn’t
stand w hat the neighbors said about
them.— D etroit Free Frees.
Yeung lady— I can always tell your
work the instant I
artist (delighted)— C in you, really?
Young lady— Easily. The women all
look alike.— New York Weekly.
“ W oman Is naturally o f a clinging
nature,” observed he. “Yea,” rejoined
his w ife, “ but she isn’t to be compar­
ed w ith a man when It comes to hold­
ing on to a 95 bill.” — New Yorker.
Sam Shinbone—Fse
thlnkin’ ob
m arrying dat youngest Jackson gaL
Mose Johnson— Don’t do It, nigger—
|on’t do I t W hy, (lat gal never kep’
a Job fo r over tw o weeks In her life.—
Ex.
Prospective Benedict—Are yon w ill­
ing to become everything or nothing
for my sake?
Prospective Bride—
Yea, i f yon leave out the “ nothing“
part o f the proposition.— Baltim ore
American.
*
“ B ring, me some coffee,“ said Mr.
Nurox. as he finished his dessert
“ Demi-tasse?" inquired the waiter.
“ Sure, I f that’s the best you g o t end
say, bring- one o* them little pots fu ll
of i t ” — Philadelphia Press.
“ You are always more or less skep­
tical about what you aee In p rin t”
“ Yea,” answered the man who baa his
own Ideas about things. “ Truth may
be at the bottom of a w ell, but it isn’t
an ink w ell.” — Washington Star.
Husband (o f popular author)— Do
you mean to M l me, doctor, that my
w ife la Insane? Doctor— No. not ao
bad as th a t but she ^ h op elessly fool­
Husband— W ell, that’ s a relief.
a ish.
I was afraid her usefulness as a w riter
is was impaired— Life.
A prison visitor recently asked one
o f the prisoners how he came to be
L yd ia E* Pinfcham 's Vegetable Compounds there. “ W ant,” was the answer.
« D ear M tul PnncHAsc:— Ignorance and neglect are the canse of “ H ow was th at pray?" “ W ell, 1 want­
untold female suffering, not only with the laws of health but with the ed another man’s watch. H e wasn’t
of a cure. I did not heed the warnings of headaches, organic w illin g I shotUd have I t and the Judge
rm.lnn, and general weariness, nntil I was well mgh prostrated. I knew I wants me to stay here five years.” —
had to do something. Happily I did the right thing. I took Lydia E . Tit-Bits.
BA-M inAlVK
and was rewarded in a few weeks to find that my aches and pains dis­
appeared, and I again felt the glow of health through my body. Sinoe
I have been w ell I have been more careful, I have also advised a number
o f my sick friends to take Lydia E . Pinkham ’s Vegetable Com­
pound, end they have never had reason to be sorry. Yours very truly,
Mug. M a t F a i r b a n k s , 216 South 7th S t, Minneapolis, M inn." (M rs. Fair-
s. P i n k h a m :— F o r over two years
re than tongue can express with
idder trouble. M y physician pro­
trouble catarrh o f the bladder,
il&oement of the womb. I had a
re to urinate, and it was very pain-
is of blood would pass w ith the
bad backache very often,
riting to you, and receiving your
itter, I followed your advice, and
L ittle W illie, who is a Philadelphia
boy, bad been watching a dog chasing
his tail fo r three mlnntee. “ Papa,” he
asked, “ what kind of a dog la that?”
“ T h a t” wild the father, “ la a watch
dog.”
W illie was silent a moment
“ W ell,” be Anally said, “ from the time
he takes to wind him self up I guess
be must be a W aterbary watch dog.”
— Philadelphia Ledger.
•
Mrs. Househunter—This bouse does
not seem to be very substantially b u ilt
Even the floor shakes when w e walk
on i t Agent— But, madam, thla floor
is— er—the very latest thing In spring
dancing floors. All the newest honses
have them. Mrs. Househunter— And
the stairs creak terribly. Agent— Oh.
w e don’t make any extra charge for
those
patent
burglar-alarm stairs,
m id im .— Chicago News.
Dick— Say— seen a letter o f mine
lying around, gray envelope? Sweep
M ops making the bed)— Do you mean
a letter starting off, “ Dearest Dickie,”
and asking you to come down and
spend Sunday, and telling you bow
lonely she has been all the week, and
ending up, “ Your own little Gladys” ?
Dick— Y e—ts. Sweep (going on mak­
ing the bed)— Then It’s in yonr top
chifloaisr drawer.— Tale Record.
m. U OUILUK.
I f you do not derive prom pt and sat­
isfactory results from the use of Pera­
na, w rite at once to Dr. Hartman, g iv ­
ing a fu ll statement of your case, and
he w ill be pleased to give you his val­
uable advice gratis.
Address D r. Hartman, President of
The Hartman Sanitarium , Columbus,
Ohio.
Apply to NATHAN BICKFORD, »14 P St.
hundred to wun ovah to Lnnnon?
Washington, D. c. 6 th N. H. Vols., 1*61-66.
F a ta « •What’s the object?
“ Golf.
“ Good! I f you learn how to play golf,
“ Oh, I don’t want to play It. I want
to learn how to pwonownee it.”
W E W ANT
AGENTS
$150 and up per
month to ener-
^
" town in Oregon
Washington and Idaho. Dignified, hon­
orable, permanent and immensely profit­
able employment at home or on the
road; something new; send stamp or
call at office for details.
SQUARE DEAL BROKERAGE CO.
129 Seventh Street,
Portland, Oregon
CURE Horses
of
HEAVES,
Diatesnper, Pink B j t o r Indigestion. A great BLOOD PURIFIER ARB CO I
MTIOHCa and a sure care for all ailments from which heaves arise.
C U R K D 9 A M O9 9 9 9 .
I t o r . kam using Prassten H w n Powder, the p u t right month* and In that Um« ha,
s in d || hors— o f B a n s . 14 o f Distemper tad 0 o f Chronic Cough. Tbs Premia
■ tm .iUn k in gelnsS a great lepnteMos ln täte ttsB aa—B rass Sshncks, »«w a sh ,» . 1
PRICK! A T DKALMUS, M et BY M A IL , SO*
warning * symptoms; will soon ? prostrate
‘woman. She thinks womans ^safeguard
Footlnltt (energetically helping at
basaar)— W on’t you put In for a ralfie
for this cushion?
V isitor— Ch. no,
thanksl
Footlnltt—O f coarse, It’s
rather useless and gaudy, and so forth;
and personally I think the design’ s
rotten. But do put In fo r It l V isitor— '
No. thanksl I made lt l— Punch.
E z U . 8. Senator M . 0 . Bntler, from
Sooth Carolina, was senator from that
state for two terms. In a recent letter
to The Perana Medicine Co., from
Washington, D. C ., says:
••I can recomm end Perana tor dys*
sta and stomach trouble. I have
a using y ou r m edicine fo r a short
period and I fe e l v e ry much relieved.
It la indeed a wonderful m edicine be­
sides a good tonic.” —M . C. B utler.
The only rational nay to cure dys­
pepsia is to remove the catarrh. P e­
rana cores catarrh. Parana does not
produce artificial digestion. I t cores
catarrh and leaves the stomach to per­
form digestion in a natural way. This
is vastly better and safer than resorting
to artificial methods or narcotics.
Perana has cored more cases of dys­
pepsia than ail other remedies com­
bined, sim ply because'it cores catarrh
wherever located. I f catarrh is locat­
ed in the head, Perana cures i t . . I f
catarrh has fastened itself in the throat
or bronchial tubes, Parana cares it.
When catarrh becomes settled in the
stomach, Perana cares it, as w ell in
this location as in any other.
Perana is not sim ply a remedy for
dyspepsia. Perana is a catarrh remedy.
Perana cares dyspepsia because it is
generally dependent opon catarrh.
K
In Use For Over 3 0 Years.
Pinkham ’s Vegetable Compound faithfully, according to directions,
D igestive R ei
Been Invented
r i B i v h v u u i d an a v o u i u u i i u u u g . a u u
lu u ru
•re various kinds of it. Many plates never
were right. Others are properly made, bat
the mouth la not put in proper condition
tor wearing the plate.
W
,.j ,
*
a
n
If yonr platoa are In an;
we* will be gled to mate an examination
d
tell you the cause of trouble.
We extract teeth wholly without pain and
nil work is at lower than reasonable rates.
H H H H H H I H H Extracting free when platee or bridges are
i>tL M. A. « u s
ordered.
’ISE BROS., Dentists
Open evening till •
u a i. r. m - ,
*—
Sundays from » to 13
Oregon, Main 'MJtt
mmsmm
W rite fo r Catalogue and P rices
IV E B ETTER satisfaction than
anything on the market at any­
thing like the price, because they
are made of good material to stand
“ Oregon roads” —iron corners on bodies,
braces on shafts, heavy second growth
wheels, screwed rims.
G
ttltS ttt
I f yon want to feel sure that yon are
getting yonr money’s worth, ask for a
“ Bee Line” or a M itchell Buggy.
WE GUARANTEE THEM.