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About Cottage Grove sentinel. (Cottage Grove, Or.) 1909-current | View Entire Issue (Jan. 21, 2021)
Cottage Grove Sentinel Community Community B1 THURSDAY | JANUARY 21, 2021 Humor at the Speed of Life Pet Tips ‘n’ Tales James Kazad — (Remembrances of life before COVID) Open contempt for those in better shape is first step to a healthier you L ike millions of Amer- icans, I recently stripped down, prepared myself for the worst, and stepped onto the scale. Soon after, I retrieved the scale from the front yard and accepted the fact that, yes — it proba- bly was defective. At my wife’s sugges- tion, I tried our neigh- bor’s scale. This led to the discovery that, of the 23 scales I tested with- in a five-mile radius of our home, every single one was off by exactly 11 pounds. Being a jour- nalist, I had to wonder: Was this a widespread problem? Were we being duped into needless ex- ercise by faulty scales? I immediately brought this to the attention of my editor, who, realizing the implications, told me to stay out of her candy drawer. The truth is, I have no one but myself to blame for putting on these ex- tra pounds. This is why, every year around this time, people just like me make a commitment to start going to the gym. I know this because I recognize most of these people from last year. We all have the same expression: grim deter- mination mixed with a sense of purpose in knowing that, afterward, there’s a KFC right across the street. We come dressed with headbands and towels over our shoulders even though we spend most of our time wandering around the gym looking for our water bottles. After making this real- ization, I was motivated to do things differently this time. Never again would I splash water on my face, then stand close enough to someone to appear as though we are workout partners. It was time to get serious about fitness by accepting the fact that the closest I’ll ever get to having buns of steel is if I happen to leave the bread box open overnight. I’m 54, married and have four teenagers; what do I need washboard abs for when I know perfect- ly well that my wife gets more turned on by me doing the laundry? With these things in mind, I put together a list of goals that will mo- tivate me because they’re actually achievable. First: Buns of steel are out. Instead, I will settle for buns of aluminum foil; as long as they can hold their shape and don’t leak, I’m happy. Second: I understand that my metabolism is slowing down and, as a result, my body’s fu- el-burning efficiency is similar to a Humvee. Unless I’m careful, I will also weigh as much as a Humvee. Third: I will no longer waste my time compar- ing my body with anyone else’s, especially if theirs is better. This should make my workouts twice as productive since I will be avoiding eye contact with everyone else at the gym. And lastly: I will stop using the scale as my measure of success. What’s the point, real- ly? They’re all wrong any- way… Bohemia Mining Days elects board, plans for 2021 festival At its Jan. 5 meeting, the BMD Board of Directors elected its 2021 officers: President Don Williams, Vice President Dave Johnson, Secretary Sylvia Kitterman and Treasurer Linda Oxley. Former Festival Coor- dinator Cindy Weeldrey- er was appointed to the board and joins direc- tors Skye Hefner, Jimmy Schaper, Linda Sexton, and Wanda Mosegard. At its Nov. 11 meeting, board members appointed Cottage Grove City Coun- cilor Kenneth Michael Roberts as its newest Bo- hemia City Marshal, suc- ceeding the late Bob Ehler. Roberts becomes the fourth marshal since the annual event began in 1959. In addition to Ehler, the previous marshals were Henry Isaacs and Gary Williams. Not knowing if a large- scale community celebra- tion will be permitted in mid-July, the board creat- ed a “bare bones” admin- istrative budget of $4,452 for this year. Research is underway to create an add-on bud- get to produce a modi- fied, smaller scale 1- or 2-day event (without cre- ating Bohemia City) on July 17-18, if the current COVID-19 restrictions on large-scale events are lifted. At its Jan. 27 meeting, budget assumptions for the smaller scale event will be finalized and the 2021 budget will be ad- opted. By early May, it will be clearer if a community celebration can happen so the board set May 1 as its “Go-No Go” date for event planning purposes. Tax deductible dona- tions to support BMD can be made by check, mon- ey order or credit card. Credit card donations can be made online at www. BohemiaMiningDays.org or by mailing a check or money order, payable to BMD, to PO Box 1297, Cottage Grove, OR 97424. ODFW invites artists to compete in annual wildlife stamp art contest Artists in Oregon and throughout the world are invited to compete in one or all three of ODFW’s 2022 stamp art competi- tions. The winning artist in each contest receives a $2,000 award and winning artwork is used to produce collector stamps and oth- er promotional items with sale proceeds benefitting Oregon’s fish, wildlife and their habitats. For more information on contest rules and to or- der art prints, visit www. dfw.state.or.us/stamp_ contest/index.asp Stamp art contests: • Habitat Conservation Stamp — Art entries must feature an eligible species from the Oregon Conser- vation Strategy in its natu- ral habitat. Species include birds, mammals, reptiles, am- phibians, fish, inverte- brates, plants and algae. See contest rules and entry form with a list of eligible species. • Waterfowl Stamp Contest — Art entries must feature the North- ern Shoveler in its natural habitat setting. See contest rules and entry form. • Upland Game Bird Stamp Contest — All en- tries must feature the Chu- kar partridge in its natural habitat setting. See contest rules and entry form for more information. Entries will be accept- ed between Aug. 27 and Sept. 24, 2021 by 5 p.m., at ODFW headquarters, 4034 Fairview Industrial Dr., SE, Salem, OR 97302. Artwork can be mailed or hand delivered. Pack- aging tips can be found on the final page of the con- test rules. We welcome all ages and skill levels to partici- pate. A panel will judge art- work based on artistic composition, anatomical accuracy of the species and general appeal. All artwork submitted will be showcased at a free art show open to the pub- lic. Collector’s stamps, art prints and other promo- tional materials are pro- duced from first-place artwork. Proceeds from product sales are used for wildlife habitat improvement, re- search projects and con- servation efforts. Interested artists are en- couraged to visit ODFW’s stamp art competition webpage for more infor- mation on the contests and to view entries from previous years. from ODE and Oregon Health Authority is pend- ing. • There will be no Crow Middle School sports this year. • The county is still ob- serving the corners on Stoney Point. Please con- tinue to follow the speed signs, slow down, and stay in your own lane. • Utility work continues on Cottage Grove-Lorane Road for 4-5 miles from about 1 and 1/2 miles east of Lorane to just over the hill towards Cottage Grove. Be alert and prepare to slow or stop as flaggers advise. Workers are along the road. • Lorane Christian Church will continue to hold drive in church and inside to meet the needs of their members and the Community. All wear masks and maintain distancing. It is a spot of normalcy in this day of COVID-19 where so many churches are closed. Thank you. LORANE COUNTRY NEWS Contributed by Lil Thompson for The Sentinel • The CAL District asks for patience as they begin to prepare for returning to the classrooms. The state is expected to release new guidance on Jan. 19. Our district wants to make sure a correct de- cision is made based on the guidance, the needs of the families, and the safety for all. • Any high school stu- dents interested in partic- ipating in sports should look at the District web- site or the weekly BUZZ. The district is still un- sure if sports will be al- lowed, but students need to be ready. Pick up pa- perwork from Cathy in the office and physicals need to be completed by the first day of practice. Call ahead to keep dis- tancing. • Proposals for first day of practice are as follows: - Football: Feb. 8 - Volleyball: Feb. 22 - Cross country: Feb. 11 Additional guidance By Mary Ellen “Angel Scribe” Bumping into a Miracle Mary Ellen, Whyspurr and Myster E. share their latest miracle. I n December 2020, when COVID was keeping us in- doors, I drove to Best Buy shortly before they closed on a mission of purr-chasing a freezer for homemade cat food. With the virus numbers increasing, I was concerned that food supplies or meat plant production might slow. My cats’ household rule, “Do not run out of food,” always needed to be upheld. As you know, Best Buy is known for electronics and appliances — not cat supplies — which makes this an even more amazing miracle. Once a freezer was located, the clerk said, “We can de- liver your freezer tomorrow.” Then he added, “The deliv- ery company will leave it at your door. They won’t come in because of COVID concerns.” “What good is that?” I replied feeling helpless. “I am 70 and won’t be able to drag it in.” He insisted three times, “That’s the way it is.” A masked-male customer purr-chasing a refrigerator close by said, “Here is my phone number. Call me when it arrives and I will help!” His act of kindness was a fast answer to a prayer! A miracle? Then the clerk exclaims, “Oh-Oh, it can’t be delivered for two weeks.” I said, “That won’t work. I have a batch of cat food to freeze.” I turned to the masked stranger and boldly asked, “What are you doing in the next 15 minutes? If I take a freezer now, it would solve all my problems.” The tall, broad man said, “I will follow you home.” Then he added, “You know it is a funny thing. I came into the store to buy a food saver to package my kitten’s raw food. The store is out of them and instead I ended up buying a mini fridge.” Then like a good pet parent, he pulled out his cell phone and shows photos of his gorgeous kitten. He then followed me and the freezer home, hefted it out of the car trunk, put it over his shoulder and carried it inside. Within an hour of making the late-night decision to purr-chase a freezer, with all the paw-tential delays, one was plugged into my wall! What are the odds of us both showing up on a cold- dark Wednesday night, in a store (not known for pet supplies), at 7 p.m. with sparse customers, both on a mission for cats’ homemade food? Cat Angels? Christmas Angels? An act of kindness? All the above? The cats don’t care as long as they have me to answer their every whim; a bed to sleep on, Animal Planet to watch, food in their furry tummies — which they deserve; of course. Stay alert: You never know when or where your next miracle will appear. Note: The good Samaritan’s kitty story will follow in a few weeks. TIPS: • Atira, a Seattle Tips ‘n’ Tales reader, wrote, “Prior to discarding face masks cut the ear straps to prevent them from blowing around dumps, off trucks, into waterways and strangling animals or make their ability to walk or feed themselves life threatening. If you see masks or gloves beside a storm drain, use a produce bag in your pocket to retrieve the items so they do not go into oceans, rivers etc. saving wildlife.” • Steve in Houston, Texas wrote, “The word ‘dumb’ does not refer to animals’ intelligence, it describes their verbal communication abilities with humans. The Web- ster Dictionary defines ‘dumb’ as; lacking the power of speech, mute, inability to talk. Pay attention to your pets’ bodies which are constantly communicating with their ears, eyes, fur and tails. It is a sign of our intelligence to pay attention — we don’t want to look ‘dumb’ in their eyes.” Pandemic restrictions have made finding stories as a “rover” reporter difficult, so email your stories: an- gelscribe@msn.com I am looking for another miracle. I have 111 pet mira- cles ready for publishing. Know a publisher? Thank you. Follow Pet Tips and Tales on Facebook. https://www. facebook.com/PetTipsandTales
