Oregon City enterprise., June 06, 1878, Image 4

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Wit and Ilnmor.
Lumber dealers always have the lar
gest board-bills.
An honest, man is like an under-done
' steak Very rare.
A Dutchman repeated the adage, "Birds
mit one feather goes mit demselves."
A new storv, by Jlrs. Hoey, is entitled,
"All or Nothing." About a lawyer, we
suppose. -
Man lives not in the present but in the
future. At 7 A. 31. he looks for noon ; at
1 P. M.he begins to sigh for C o'clock.
There ought to be some way of utiliz
ing the tramps. Even alligator hides are
worth seventy-five cents each ia Louisi
ana. Tiieiie may be a "time for every
thing," but the time to finish the Wash
ington monument has never been dis
covered. There were a gang of gypsies in town
the other day. To a man with only one
shirt a gypsy is an object of dreamy con
templation.
A Columbus man tays he started in
thirty years ago to make $1,400,000. lie
has got the fourteen, but the ciphers
uotner him. .
It isn't the supremacy of the capital
ists that the disaffected classes in this
country object to so much as working be
tween meals.
The subject of a New Ilaven man's
address was, "What shall we live oni
We didn't get the particulars, but we
think it is eggs.
A Piute chief owns a high silk hat,
and is so careful of it that, bis but being
leaky, he keeps it covered with skins in
a hole in the ground.
A New York Irishman who had a pup
RDd a larjre dorr, cut two holes in the
kennel, one big . one for the dog, and a
little one for tho pup.
A man was walking along a Chicago
street sinsins. "Heaven is mv home."
'Don't you feel homesick?" yelled
small boy who passed him.
People who attempt to cut boardiDg-
house pie-crust with a fork, should re
member that time thrown away can never
bo recalled. Oil City Derrick.
Bob Isoehsoll says: "Woman has
the right to do as she pleases." Well,
whether she has or not, that's exactly
what she does if she s married.
E. Burd Grubb is captain of a militia
company in Philadelphia. Wou't the
American eagle scream when it sees Burd
Grubb that it camiot cat. Worcester
Press.
A Bridgeport man has been 'twenty
years perfecting a machine to enable him
to fly over Niagara Falls. It would have
been cheaper, we think, to have taken to
the bridge.
Jem Mace says that although the God
dess of .Liberty on the new dollar seems
to be in very good training he will fight
her lor the championship of America,
and afterwards tend bar for her. New
York Herald.
A tom-cat is a more independent ani
mal than man. When a man comes home
at 2 or 3 o'clock in the morning lie slips
in as quietly as possible, but a tom-cat
don t seem to care. The later the hour,
and the nearer the house it approaches,
the louder it will yell.
The sexton of a parish church in county
Armagh was about to lose his wife. She
begged him to bury her in Tyrone,
among her own kindred, forty miles
away. "Indeed, Peggy," said he, "I'll
try ye here; but if you give any trouble,
I'll take ye up and bury ye in Tyrone."
"JonN,M said a poverty-stricken man to
his son, "I've made my will to-day."
"Ah!" replied John, "you were liberal to
me, no . doubt." "Yes, John, I came
down handsome. I've willed you the
whole State of Virginia to make a liv
ing in, with the privilege of going else
where if you can do better."
A German peasant, in early railway
days, was taken to see the performance
of a locomotive. lie had never known
carriages to be moved except by animal
power. Every other explanation failed
. to make the matter clear to him. After
long reflection, therefore, and seeing no
possible escape from the conclusion, con
fidently, to his companion, "there must
be horses inside 1"
Mr. Wheeler of New Hampshire
who died worth $11,000 seems to have
been a pleasant sort of a man. His will
says "Expend it all on my tombstone."
Ex. Some of the heirs have .already
filed objections to this, and the money
will probablv be expended on the law
yers. Mr. "Wheeler will be extremely
fortunate if he gets a hemlock slab for a
tombstone. Oil City Derrick.
Mr. Barscm insists that animals won't
driuk whisky. And what does this prove,
Phineas? Do they know how to waltz,
or to sing, or to conduct law-suits, or to
preach sermons? Do they wear high hats
and insist on new bonnets for Easter? Do
they purchase milk at six cents a quart,
and are they partial to baked beans? Great
and unequaled circuser, what new hum
bug is this? Buffalo Express.
P. T. Barnum says : "I tell you. as a
showman, you can't make animals drink
whisky. They know better." The
showman is mistaken. : Wo once heard a
woman call out of a second story window
to an object that for nearly an hour, had
been trying in vain to unlock the front
door: "Drunk again, you old hog, are
your' And if a hog lsu t an animal,
what is it? Norrislown Herald.
An uptown retired builder, who ex
periences great satisfaction in dwelling
upon the fact that he is a "self-made
man, is jriven to poking sticks right and
left without regard to politeness or pro
priety. The other day, in a crowded
store, he commenced bantering a ne'er-
do-well of doubtful antecedents, who
drifted into town some years ago, wind
ing up his remarks as follows: "Say
now, did you ever have a father or moth
er?" "Sartin's you live," came back the
reply, like a shot ; "I m none of your self-
made men.
"Wht, how d'ytlo, 3Irs Careful are
all your folks pretty well?" asked one
neighbor of another, whom she met in
Hempstead a few days ago. "Oh, yes,
pretty well, thank you that is, about as
well as usual. Father hasn't "been quite
well Bince ho banked up the cellar last
fall, and overworked himself ; thinks he
hurt his side.' And mother has got the
rheumatism so bad she hasn't been able
to get down stairs for a week; Matilda
Ann has a 6light touch of the diphtheria,
to the doctor says; Jimmie can't ppeak
above a whisper, for a sore throat; Susie
is just getting another rising in her ear.
and the baby has had two more spells of
i-roup. My husband can hardly do any
work on account "of his sore eye, and I
thought I'd die last night with neuralgia
in my head but we're all about as com
mon. How's you folks?"
X
The Romance of Accident.
Many of our most important inven
tions and discoveries owe their origin to
the most trivial circumstances; from the
simplest causes the most important ef
fects have ensued. The iollowincr are a
few culled at random for the amusement
of our readers :
Tiie trial of two robbers before the
Court of Assizes of the Basses-Pyrenees
accidentally led to a most interesting
archaeological discovery. The accused,
Itivas a shoemaker, and Bellier a weaver.
by armed attacks on the highways and
frequent burglaries, had spread" terror
arounu the neighborhood of bisterton.
The evidence against them was clear;
but no traces could be obtained of the
plunder, until one of the men gave a clew
to the mystery. Itivas in his youth had
been a shepherd-boy near that place, and
knew the legend of the Trou d'Argent,
a cavern on one of the mountains with
sides so precipitous as to be almost inac
cessible, and which no one was ever
known to have reached. The commissary
of police of Sisterton, after extraordinary
labor, succeeded in scaliDg the mountain,
and penetrated to the mysterious grotto,
where he discovered an enormous quan
tity of plunder of every description.
The way having been once found, the vast
cavern was afterward explored by savants;
and their researches brought to light a
number of Roman medals of the third
century, flint hatchets, ornamented pot
tery, and the remains of ruminants of
enormous size. These interesting dis
coveries, however, obtained no indul
gence for the accused (inadvertent) pio
neers of science, who were sentenced to
twenty years' hard labor.
During the Thirty Years' War in Ger
many, the little village of Coserow, in
tho i.sland of Usedom, on the Prussian
border of the Baltic, was sacked by the
contending armies, the villagers escaping
to the hills to save their lives. Among
them was a simple pastor named Schwerd
ler, and his pretty daughter Mary. When
the danger was over, the villagers found
themselves without houses, food, or mon
ey. One day, we are told, Mary went up
the Streckelberg to gather blackberries;
but soon afterward she ran back joyous
and breathless to her father, with two
shining pieces of amber each of very
great size. jSne told her father that near
the shore the wind had blown away the
sand from a vein of amber; that she
straightway broke oil" these pieces with
a stick; that there was an ample store of
the precious substance; and that she had
covered it over to conceal her secret.
The amber brought money, food, clothing,
and comfort; but those were superstitious
times, and a legend goes that poor Mary
was burned for witchcraft. At the vil
lage of Sttlmeu, amber was first accident
ally found by a rustic who was fortunate
enough to turn some up with his plough.
Many valuable literary relics have been
preserved by curious accidents, often
turning up just in time to save them from
crumbling to pieces. Not only mineral
but literary treasures have been brought
to light when excavating mother earth.
For instance, in the foundations of an
old house, Luther's "Table Talk" was
discovered "lying in a deep, obscure hole,
wrapped in strong linen cloth, w hich was
waxed all over with beeswax within and
w ithout." There it had remained hidden
ever since its suppression by Pope Greg
ory XIII. The sudden falling in of a
celling, for example, of Eome chambers
in Lincoln's Inn, revealed the secret de
pository of the Thurloe state papers.
Other literary treasures have turned up
iii an equally cuiious manner. Milton's
essay ou the "Doctrines of Christianity"
was discovered in a bundle of old dis
patches; and it is said that one of the
cantos of Dante's great poem was found,
after being long mislaid, hidden away
beneath a window-sill.
It is curious to trace how the origin of
some famous work ha? been suggested
apparently by the merest accident. We
need ffut remind the reader how Lady
Austen's suggestion of "the sofa" as a
subject for blank verse was the beginning
of "The Task," a poem which grew to
formidable proportions under Cowper's
facile pen. Another example of
"What great events from trivial causes spring,"
is furnished by Lockhart's account of the
gradual growth of "The Lay of the Last
Minstrel." The lovely Countess of Dal
keith hears a wild legend of border di
ablerie, and sportively asks Scott to make
it the subject of a ballad. The poet's
accidental confinement in the midst of a
yeomanry camp gave him leisure to medi
tate his theme to the sound of a bugle;
suddenly there flashes on him the idea of
extending his simple outline so as to em
brace a vivid panorama of that old border-life
of war and tumult. A friend's
suggestion led to the arrangement and
framework of the "Liy" and the conce;
tion of the ancient harper. Thus step
step grew the poem that first made its
author famous. The manuscript of
"Waverley" lay hidden away iu an old
cabinet for years before the public were
aware of its existence. In the words of
the Great Unknown: "I had written the
greater part of the - first volume and
sketched other passages, when I mislaid
the manuscript; and only found it by the
merest accident, as I was rummaging the
drawer of an old cabinet; and I took the
fancy of finishing it."
The characters in "Oliver Twist" of
Fagin, Sikos and Nancy, were suggested
by some sketches of Cruikshank, who
long had a design to show the life of a
Loudon thief by a series of drawings.
Dickens, while paying Cruikshank a visit,
happened to turn over some sketches in
a portfolio. When he came to that oDe
which represents Fagin in the condemned
cell, he studied it lor half an hour, and
told his friend that he was tempted to
Changs the whole plot of big 6tory not
to carry Oliver through adventures in the
country, but to take him up into the
thieves' den in London, show what this
life was, and bring Oliver through it
without sin or shame. Cruikshank con
sented to let Dickens write up t.- as many
of the drawings as he thought would suit
his purpose. So the etory'as it now runs
resulted in a great measure from that
chance inspection of the artist's portfolio.
The remarkable picture of the Jew
malefactor in the condemned cell, bitin
his nails in the torture of remorse, is as
sociated with a happy accident. The
artist bad been laboring at the subject
for several days, and thought the task
hopeless; when sitting up in his bed one
morniDg with his hand on his chin and
his fingers in his mouth, the whole atti
tude expressive of despair, he saw his
face in the cheval glass. "That's it!" he
exclaimed ; "that's the expression I want."
And he soon finished the picture. Cham
bers' Journal.
A iiandbill announcing a picnic for
colored people, in Kentucky, reads thus:
"Persons attending are requested to leave
patois and razors at home."
The eye is the index of the soul.
Some Negro Stories.
I. THE BIGGEST FOOL.
A traveller he was travellin' along, an'
he stop at de fust house be come, an' ast
'em to gib him sompin to eat. So dey
sarnt de olest gal down in de cellar fur to
cut some bacon; jsnishe stay so long dey
all went down t&hG what she bin doin'.
An' dey fin' her settin' on de steps, cry
in'; an' dey ast her what wuz de matter
wid her. An' she say she wuz tinkin'
'bout what the must name her fust son
when she done git married; an' 6he
couldn't tink 'bout no name, so she
'lowed she mus' cry some. So den dey
all sot down by her an' ups and cries too.
So den de traveller he go down too, an'
he fin' 'em alls a cryin': and so be tuk
his hat, aD' says: "Good-by, folks.
When I tin' some mo! folks any bigger
fools dan you alls is, den I come back dis
way an' marry dat olfest gal." So he go
way widout no dinner. An' bime-by he
come 'cross one ole 'oman had done scrub
her house. Au' she got a wheel-borror
and was a-wheelin'. An' he ast her what
wuz she doin'. An' she say : "I'se tryin'
for to wheel some o' dish ere sunshine
into my ole house, fur to dry de floor, an'
ebery time I gits a big borrer full o' 6un
it all go 'way 'fore I gits in de shade.
'Pears like it Hint no 'count no how, dis
old sunshine 1" Den de traveller he say:
"You ole fool! Opou you' door an' let
de sunshine on you' floor. Dat de way to
do."
So den he went 'long a little furder,
an' he foun' a man had done have a par o'
breeches made; an' dey wuz de fust par
o' breeches ebber he have. An' he done
tie 'em up in de tree, an' wuz tryin' fur
to jump into 'em; and ebery time he
jump he jump too high. So den he feel
mighty bad, an' he say : "How is I gwine
to get into dem breeches no how?" An'
den he run an' jump one mo' time; an'
hejumpoberde breeches agin. An' de
traveller he say: "You big fool! Take
dem breeches down an' pull 'em ober you'
legs dis-sa-way."
So de man tank him, an' de traveller
went long little furder, an' be fin' a man
sawin' logs in de wood. An' he ast him
what wuz he doin'. An' he say: "De
cows done come an' sleep roun' my house
las' night; an' dey litter up my yard so
bad I gwine to saw some logs l'ur to move
my house away." "You big fool!" say
de traveller. "Go long home and git' a
shovel an' clear up you' jard, au' let de
old house 'lone." So dat man tank him
an' go home.
Au' de traveller he travel 'loEg some
mo'; au' he come to a noder house, dat
have grass growin' ou de roof. And
dere wuz de ole man an' de ole 'oman
tryin' fur to haul dey cow up onto de
roof lur to eat de grass. An' dey done
tied rope roun' dc ole cow's neck, so him
tongue hacgin out. And de ole oman
say : "Jes look at de cow I He want dat
ar grass so bad him tongue stickin' out."
"You ole fools!" say de traveller. "You
chokiu' de ole cow to def. Go 'long on
top de house, on' cut de grass an' trow it
down.
So den dey tank him. An' he say :
don' travel, to de end ob de fools. So cow
I gwine back fur to marry dat olest gal.
So he go back, an' he fm' em' all sittin'
dar, cryin' yit.
II. KILLING THE RABBIT.
One day Bear and Fox dey ketches
Rabbit, an' dey savs: "Less us burn dis
ole Rabbit up." Kase Rabbit he steal
ebery ting dey makes. An' so dey light
one big hre, to trow Rabbit in; an Rib
bit he jes' larf. An' Fox say: "What
you larrjn' 'bout, my Brudder Rabbit?'
Au' Rabbit he say: "Kase you alius
gwine to trow me in de fire; an' I was
born in de fire, me an' my mammy too."
"Is dat so?" Fox say. An' den Fox an'
Bear scratch him head an' tink little bit.
An' den dey say: "Well, ef you wuz
born in de tire, you an' your mammy too,
den we gwine trow you in de brier-patch.
So den R tbbit he 'tended like he wuz a
cryin'; an, arter dey done trow him in
de brier-patch Rabbit he jump up an'
say: "Guod-by, Brudder Bear. Good
by, Brudder Fox. Dis is my home. Is
you ebber see anybody borned in de fire?"
S den de R ibbit he broke an' run, an'
Fox au' Bear dey run too. An' ole Bear
he ketch Ribbit gittin' ober de fence.
An' Rabbit feel de ola Bear hab hold of
his leg. So he say: "Brudder Bear, you
got hoi' de fence 1 Let go de fence, an'
ketch hoi' ob my leg !" So Bear he let go
Rabbit's leg, and ketch hoi' ob de fence.
An' Rabbit he jump and run, and arter a
while he come to de road. So he lay
down side de road an' 'tended like he
wuz dead. An' bime-by de old fish-cart
come 'long, and de old tishman see dead
Rabbit Hying by de road; so he jump
down -mi' trow him in de cart. Go den
Rd-' i iie watch an' watch, when de ole
m ,i lookin' t'oder way, an' he trow de
ih out in do road, an' he keep on' trow-
ijr em out. An' uen he jump out too,
an' pick up all de fish, till he got one big
Iwsket full, an' den he start fur to go
home. An' he meet Fox. An' Fox say:
"Brudder Ribbit, whar did you git all
dem fish?" And Rabbit say: "Brudder
Fox, dis wuz de way. I see an ole fish
cart a comin', an' I jus' lies right down
in de road, an' hole my troat out fur de
wheel to go ober. An' de ole Ashman
when he hear my bones crack, he trow
out some fish in a basket; an' I jumps up
an' runs home dis-sa-way." So den ole
Fox go 'long till he come to de road, an'
den he lie right down in de middle of de
track, an' bole him troat out forde wheel
to go ober, jU3' like Ribbit done tole him.
An' sho 'nougb, bime-by de ole fish-cart
come 'long an' Fox he lie right still; an'
hil all his bones crack, an' ole Fox done
dead !
Americcs Symmes, son of John Cleve
Symnies, who invented the curious theory
that the earth is hollow, open at the
poles, and capable of being inhabited
within, wants to be attached to the How
gate expedition to the Arctic regions in
order that he may have the opportunity
of proving his father's theory to be true.
He is bound to go into that hole if he
can Gnd it. It is his by right of inher
itance, and it would be unjust to deprive
him of his right. Let him go," by all
means. It he never comes back, we c
at least imagine him dwelling happily
that inner world w here the rigors of the
Arctic regions are escaped, and from
whence tho bears return fat and com
fortable in the Spring. Portland Tran
script. The experiment of heating cities by
steam seems likely to prove successful.
At Lockporr, N. Y., the past winter, three
miles of main pipe were laid which sup
plied steam to seventy takers, who were
thus enabled to heat their houses at no
greater expense than their ordinary out
lay fur coal, and at a great saving of la
bor. It will be a great alleviation of the
inconveniences of our rigorous climate
when we can turn on the steam, a9 we
now do gas or water, and be comfortable
without the care of the furnace. Port'
land (He.) Transcript.
i-S
COURTESY OF BANCROFT LIBRARY,
UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA,
BERKELEY, CALIFORNIA
That Paint of Ours.
. vnr anipv article, written
iiiiuna iio' f --J
of new carpets
and Averill paint, inspires a few thoughts in
sympatny witn your remarks. vicunu;
u o-rtHin.sa " Sr sava the cood book, and I
fully believe in the statement. A man's sur
roundings governs nis every mougui mm
many of his acts. The pure and the beauti
ful !j .inn.tinir Tilth i A enressin s. and in
duces a state of mind antagonistic to the cre
ation of hijfh tnougnis or nooie ueeua. m
conzratulate vou ou your altered condition.
showing that you are blessed with wide
awake governors ; may the editorials prove
the virtue 01 paint ana crystal bujusum. a-"
excuse now for diny dishes being served up
to the many readers of the Rukal,.
I too am in tne rmasi 01 renovation. iu
Pleasant must keep its name trood. So we
espied the advertisement of the California
Paint Company in the Kcral; we gave our
order and a supply is somewhere on the way.
lhis Averill paint is Decoming popular iur
its intrinsic value. "-Not like many patent
nostrums; it requires only to be used and
seen to bring it Into favor.
John Taylor.
Mr. Pleasant. Tuolumne Co.. Cftl. Mining
and Scientific Pre.fi. -
New Employment Office.
New entemrises of everv character, tend
ing to benefit the public, we hail with pleas
ure, and one that strikes us with considera
ble force, at the present, is the fitting up of
the premises. No. 626 Clay street, San Fran
cisco, next door to Frank G. Edwards carpet
store, for a Bevfr, flrst-cUas Iutelligence and
imployment Olhee by those gentlemen wuo
have so lonsr pleased the public in their ef
forts while ia the employ of Crosett & Co.,
in whose establishment they have been the
leading men for a number of years, Mr. Han
sun bavin? charge of the female, and Mr.
Ewer of the mat department. They now
propose trying the business on their own
account, under the Arm name of C. R. Han
sen A Co., and their Ion? experience and
practical knowledge of the wants of the
community well entitle them to a large share
or patronage. One or tbe great points of
their success will be in the fact of Mr. Han
sen speaking fluently the German, French
and Scandinavian language?, and his large
and extensive acquaintance among those
nationalities must add greatly to their suc
cess; tnetr mode of doing business must
commend itself to all seeking domestic help.
The skill of the mechanic, the labor of the
artisan, tbe farmer, tbe dairyman, tbe mills
and mines, the hotels and restaurant?, in
fact, every branch of iudustry enn there find
practical and ellicient help. Tbey intend
devoting their whole euergies in making
their ouice one of a high grade, and "in their
vocabulary there shall be no such word as
fail;" they intend that every order shall be
tilled promptly to the minutest detail, and no
euort will be spared to place right employes
in tne rigut place; thus, the two great ends
will be accomplished, viz.: tbe employers
will And themselves surrounded with good
and ellicient help, while the faithful domes,
tic, and all classes, male and female, will rJnd
ready assistance to obtain good positions in
their various vocations. Their old friends
will remember their exertions in the past,
and give thftu their patronage in the future;
and we urge upon those seeking a reliable
ollice and not thoroughly posted, to call
with, full confidence upon tbe new Employ
ment Otlieo of C. K. Hansen & Co., 020 Clay
street, San Francisco. is. F. Chronicle.
Ask 5Tour Grocer for Paul Reiger's
Concentrated Flavoring Extracts; or if you
want to get a still stronger article, ask for
Paul lleiger's Treble Extra Flavoring Ex
tracts, not surpassed by any in the world. If
you want a delicious glass of Lemonade, ask
your grocer for Paul lteiger's Lemon Sugar.
Essence of Jamaica Ginger, and Powdered
Bristol Bath Brick for cleaning knives and
forks, tinware, copper boilers, tfce. Above
articles sold everywhere and manufactured
by Paul Reiger, 511 Front st., San Francisco.
Wanted. A good Agent in every city,
town and village in the United States, to
take subscriptions for the Commercial Ad
vocate, the only anti-Catholic and conserva
tive labor paper published in America. Sub
scription 1-3.00 a year, in advance. Good in
ducements will be otlered to Agents. Write
for terms and full particulars.. Address Com
mercial. Advocatk, 5125 Montgomery Street,
San Francisco. Cal.
Physicians of high standing unhesitating
ly give their indorsement to tbe usi of the
Graefenberg-MarshaH's Catholicon for all fe
male complaints. The weak and debilitated
find wonderful relief from a constant use of
this valuable remedy. Sold by all druggiste.
f 1.50 per bottle.
Ctna Mowers, with double motion and
latest improvements and "extras," at greatly
reduced prices. Berry & Place, corner Mar
ket and Fremont streets, San Francisco.
Meadows Magic Liniment is a sure cure
for Neuralgia, Headaches, Rheumatism, etc.,
or money refunded. It is sold by all drug
gists, at 50 cts. a bottle. Abrama & Carroll,
Agents, San Francisco.
J. W. SHAEFFER & CO'3 GREEN SEAL
CIGARS are made from finest Havana To
bacco. 323 Sacramento st.. San Francisco.
Photographs of superior finish at Morse's Palace
of A rU 417 Montgomery street, San Francisco.
Buttkrice & Co.'s Patterns, ipring styles. Send
stamp for catalogue, la 4 Post St., San Francisco.
TitRTn Saved. Filling Teeth a specialty. Sets of
Teeth from $18 upward. Teeth extracted without
pain. DI4. MORFFEW, ISO Sutter street, S. F.
All. Photographs made at the New York Gallery,
No. 5 Third St.,S. F., are guaranteed to be first class.
Prices to suit the times. J. II. P tbbs. Proprietor.
Crobbtt it Co., Clay street. S. F., are pre
pared to furnlth help of all kinds at short notice,
for hotels, mills or farms, both male and female. Send
your order to thein. They are prompt and reliable.
Fob the best Photographs aud the lowest prices go
to the old and reliable establishment of WM. SHEW
No. 115 Kearny street, San Francisco, established in
1851, and formerly located on Montgomery street.
Connolssrurs
And others, not satisfied with the goods and prices In
the interior, would find it to their advantage to for
ward their orders to the old and well-known Grocery
House of C. J. Hawlrt & Co., established In 1853.
It has one of the largest and best selected stock of
goods on the Pacific Coast Tlease favr us with your
orders. We guarantee satisfaction or refund the
money. Goods shipped to any depot or boat free of
charge. Do not hesitate to send your orders. C. J.
HAWLEV & CO., Wholesale and Ketail Grocers, S15
and 217 Sutter street, San Francisco. P. O. Box 844.
Purchasing Agency.
Any parties desirous of haying goods purchased for
them in San Francisco can do so br addrensincr xir-m
rW. H. Ashley, who will send samples of goods for
weir inspection, to tne latie i would say that I
have a nrst-clasa establishment for Dress-making, and
am prepared to execute country orders with dispatch.
Being engaged in business here I have the advantage
of buying goods direct from the Importers at whole
sale, and would give my patrons the boneflt of same.
Goods purchased and sent C. O. D. Send for Circular.
Addreas Mas. W. H. ASH LET ISO Sutter street.
Boom 51 San Francisco.
lven Away. A superb pair of 6x8 Chromos,
Worthy to lrame and adorn any home, and a Tt ree
Months subscription to Lkibcpk Hours, a charming
16 p. ice literary paper, lull of the Choicest btorlea.
Poetry, etc Sent t ree to all sending K fteen CenU
(stamps taken ) t ny postage. The publishers. J. L.
Patten & Co.. 162 William St., S. Y., Guarantee every
one Duuole Value or tnonev sent. iftii0 in prizes and
big pay given to agents. Write at once!
1 ONTGOMtKY'S TKMPKKANCK HOTEL.
1VL Second St.. San Francisco. t Mt-al Tif uwiTki
50
Mixed Cards, with name.ln case. 13c. 25 no i alike
.i-.. uiiii ivrv. Aiwaicr lpin., r oreHl VI 1 1 I f.
Elegant UartU, Oriental, Morning-Glory, etc no
JJ -l aUk,with nanie,Qc. I.B.Haveiis.fenmiiiit, N . Y .
gfT - JUU free. C.D.PlKB &Co..AuguMa,Me!
UK. fcJ I I.ltf :... DOTIMT, 0X5
Marht lrt. Wan fraiiflnco.
H
OMAN HAIR! Th Cheapest A No. 1 goods In the
City. A. B. SAMPSON, i IP Second btreet, S. K
CARCE GOODS, Book. Photon. Ac. Sam.
f pie A Catalogue, 3c. Paris Book to. Chicago, 111.
RllflC P.EVOLVERS. Price List Free. Address
UUIIB Great Wetern Gun Works. Pittshnrc. p
i "I VAVf V iws"ira.-n c
J Marble, am;., no two alike, with name. 10 cts..
postpaid. NASSAU CAUD Co.. NSBAr, '. Y.
PWIKHK If. KAKF.lt. Lithographer,
I A. 4 fife f'lttV C C IP Unn. ..... . .
Checks, Drang, Notes. Corporation fegaU. &c , Ac.
REVOLVER FREEbox?KTddwr
J.JJown boo, 136 and 138 Wood bt., Pittsburgh. Pa.
Out of Tune.
When tbe tones of a musical instrument
become harsh and discordant, we say it is
"out of tune." Tbe same may be said of
ihat far more wonderful and complicated
piece of mechanism, the human structure,
when it becomes disordered. Not only actu
al disease, but those far more common caus
es, overwork, mental anxiety, and fast living,
may impair its vigor and activity. Tbe best
remedy for a partial collapse of the vital
energies, from these as from other causes, is
Hoste Iter's Stomach Bitters, which is at the
same time an agreeable and mind cheering
cordial, and the best possible invigorant in
all cases of debility. It is an incomparable
6tomachic and adi-bilious medicine, eradi
cates fever and aarue. and prevents subse
quent attacks. It remedies with certaiuty
and thoroughness bowel and kidney com
plaints, dyspepsia, nervousness, rheumatic
troubles, and manv other bodily ailments.
It also counteracts influences which predis
pose to disease.
AJEWEST NOVELTIES AND NOTIONS. FKESH
1.1 est goods. Uuttoiii prices. Catalogues free
SADLEK & CO., 116 Post, btreet, San Francisco.
C It. IIAI,t.JIAlKA(;riltKK
Piunoiortes. Factory and Salesroom. A
Tyler Street. San Francisco. Send fur Price Lint.
CUOSSETT DENTIST
Sfo. lO Third Ntrert, !n Franelseo.
i nnv nnuu acccdc wAXTEn.Foit new
LHUI UHlllHUUbnWaud salable articles.
Flue Inducements. For particulars address A.
COPLIN, 4JO Uth street, Oakland. Cal.
GILHAM'S GREEN OINTMENT,
FOK all external diseases of the Horse, has no equal
For sale by Traders, Druggist and Harness-maker.
MAIN 6t WINCHESTEU. San Francisco.
'lfls'9!.
a day smre made by Agents selling our
Chromos, Crayons, Picture and Chrome
Cards. 15 samples, worth ., sent.
postpaid, lor M5 Cents. Illustrated Catalogue irm.
J. xl. B 1 1 f UKU a ua a. eua i u J . iimmouiojo.
cmjn rriD niici solid gold mounted
OCllU Tun Ullb Cameo, Amethyst and
Quartz Kings. t7.5U each. At 11. MVtliS & SON'S
Imhu Otiicea, 237, S3 and 4Q Kearny Street. S. F.
MY POULTRY CIRCULAR TELLS HOW TO
double egg production of ht-us, raise chickens
without loss from disease, etc. Sent tree to any ad
dress. C. P. S 1'oN E, Mission Market, San Francisco.
A LADY IN SAN FRANCISCO HAS RECENTLY
effected some wondtui cures In the restoration
of Paralytics aud also lu Nervous Diseases, tabe has
been Induced to otfer hrr services to the public. Ap
ply to tl latu fat., bet. Howard and Folsom, S. F.
WANTED ACENTS 'ioi'.i-co1'
Kiilai'ttrd, lu ludia Iuk and Water Colors. The
oldest Copying House on the Pacific Coast. Send for
circulars io RIKOLK BROS., xtt t Post atreet, S. F.
-EESES ADJUSTABLE STENCIL.
THE
IV best mad olall sizes, lu bulk, in
foutx.
mid in alphabets. Price List lrue.i ' ,.L
SADLKli & Co.. Pacific Coast Agents, l-MU
Po Strc t. San Fihiicihco. ' 11
Tfl DDIUTCDC-tW Brevier, SIX) s. Min
I U mill I LnO ion, .) tb. Non. areil (or any
part of thefe ionts ), all in good order and nearly new,
lor sale st less thau half price. Also, an Adams hook
press and several fonts wood type. Iinpr-sious of
type, with rrice, sent on request. D. V. STIlKETT,
3t Clay Street, San Francisco.
RECITATIONS AND READINGS
FROM
sii.viesii:aki; axu tiii: poets,
I
Ar r RIVATE PARLORS AND DRAW-
tne rooms, or at public entertainments. OLIVER
BROOKS, Actor and Elocutionist. Also, receives
a limited number of pupils. Forms reading clas-.es
and manage dramatic c:ub.s. OttU-e hours from m s.
M. to t m. and i to 4 p. m. Call or address No. 3iU
Post Street. San Francisco.
frfc
A NEW BROOM
SWKEPH CI.EAJi." The Patent Elastic, war
ranted never to get shaky on the handle in the hot
test and dryeM climate. Auk your grocer for it. Man
ufactured only by ROiilNSON. lOH LEIC & CO.. Si IS
aud Stl7 Sacramento Street. San Francisco.
INTERNATIONAL HOTEL,
SX a.ua S2tt Mearnr HI., Man Fraurlara.
HI SO and V'C OO PER DAY.
H. C. PATRIDttB. ... Pbopkiktob.
Two Concord 'oavch. with lht name of tht
Hotel on, will always be iu watting at the landing tc
convey passengers to the Hotel free. J4rBe sure yoo
get into the ricnt Conch; : you do nut. they WiC
Charlie ron.
100,000
NEW YORK CIGARS!
JUST RECEIVED EX RAIL. AND FOR SALE
AT LOWEST MARKET RATES.
KOZMINSKY fc BRO .,
202 Sansome Street, San Francisco.
THE UNIQUE BOON!
IADIESand gentlemen, save yonr money. Avoid
J humbiiggery and the clianccsof being crippled
All who are afflicted with hard or soft Corns, Bullions,
Wart. Moles. Jec.&c. SURG EON'S MAnS will remove
them completely and at once, and witnout knife, pain,
soreness or scurritlcatiou. One application only re
quired. Recommended by leading lamilies. Price,
post-paid, i.5'1. N. It. Fetid or olleusive Arm-pits,
Feet, &i, which arises from diseased perspiratory
ducts. Try the HEUB-DISIN FECTOIi, an actual and
the only remedy of i lie kind. Price, $2. Orders sent to
all parts of the country on receipt of price. Address
P. K. LOPEZ, M. D., care or M. Doetus Ferdenan
derz'a S. F. laboratory. Agent. xlS Kearny St.. S. F.
100.000 llos.
CHOICE SMOKING TOBACCO,
Packed in two, four and eight ounce Sacks from
Forty to Sixty-five Cents per Pound.
These Tobaccos 111 b fonnd superior to any in the
market for the price. We will send them to anyone
address in lots of not less than five (5) pounds, C. O. D
Address,
E. BRIGGS & CO., Tobacconist.
52S and 5X7 Market St.. San h ranclsco.
CAMERON HOUSE,
510 Sacramento St., cor. Leldesdorn,
ban Francisco.
TH. BAILEY. FOR FIFTEEN YEARS PRO
J. prlctor of the Old Portsinomh House, ban
Francisco, has leased the above House, and having put
the same In good order and repair, will be happy to see
nis old customers, and will endeavor to make them at
home, as at his former location.
CLIPPER SPRING BED!
fS PROOF AOAIXST BED BUGS AND VERMIN.
A. I lrr-class Hair Mattress furnished. Sent C O 1)
to any address in the country. Price from 7 to tu"
i- '! ',x-Pd!f, measurement of bedstead. C. D. &
E. H1NCKLY, New Montgomery Street, S. F
PACIFIC WATER CURE
Eclectic Health Institute.
NORTHWEST CORNER 7th AND L STS.,
SACRAMENTO, CAL,.
,5e,in? f?lly PrePared to treat all forms of disease on
the latest and most scier.tiac principles, together
?' K?odrooms Rml """rd, we with confidence ask
H.F lc patronage. For further particulars ad
dress M. K. tLAVTOSI, 31. !.. i'roprlrlor.
FOR SALE,
SCHOOL LANDJWARRAHTS
LAND SCRIP.
orNeada? LoCBtcd and Tltle Secured In California
Attorneys Tar Land Claimants.
23 Commercial t. San Francisco.
ALREKT MAU A CO.VS
oror Savon
Aslr yonr Grocer for U and take no other, a It is the
aPjor fml'7 "fe. Each bar weighs one full
r?. r-T.?.?re-r"0 ",e "gents for the Pacific Coast
I'll. Km,K.LL TOILET WIAFS. These Toilet So-ps
EMPtROR snV0N '"JPrted- Kemember the name,
-HIet'M Cream Dry Hop Yeast, warranted to please.
Oillet'sB D mhle Extracts, the purest and strongest.
Millet's Lemon Sugar makes the best lemonade.
"I1'" Baking Powder, always sure to please.
J?-?'" tnr sale by ALBERT MAU & CO.
Wholesale Grocers, 1 and 1S California Street.
San franciseo. '
H. P. GREGORY & CO.,
a and 4 California St.. S. F..
Bole Agents or the Celebrated
SPIDER HOSE!
A brand of Rubber Hose made ex
pressly for e on the Pacific Coast
Costs no more and guaranteed to out
last auy other made.
T ROCK BOTTOM PRICF.S. DOUBLE F4RM
45 peret. Single Buggy Harness. ilsT.'iS
Si r.", KTil.- "DeI !.nic' all complete. j to
California Rati.
Saddle nn n.hl.l.A. . .. . . '
. . . . . - ... . ,r t rm 1 1 will Btnfiiria uu.
-h.? ' r, ach' w,th (nchos. I
set.
Side
... . . . . uoiesaie caaaiery Dealer
CALVE RT'S
CAKBOLIO
SHEEP WASH
per gallon.
T. W. JACKSON. Ban Fran
Cisco. Sole Agent for the Pa
cific Coast.
Yerba Buena Bitters
Purine the Blood.
Yerba Buena Bitters
Rsiulates the Livery
Yerba Buena Bitters
Regulates the Bowels.
Yerba Buena Bitters
For Biliousness.
Yerba Buena Bitters
For Liver Complaint.
Yerba Buena Bitters
Cures Dyipepsia.
Yerba Buena Bitters
Cures Jaundice.
Yerba Buena Bitters
For Indigestion.
CRANE & BRIGHAM, Agents. S. F.
JULY 4, 1818.
WORKS!
AM- KINDS.
Our own make, extra size
and quality.
Fire Crackers!
All sizes, from Gold Chop
to Giants. We are closing out our lre worts ana
uller Nperlal Iuducrinrnt to the trade.
CHURCH & CO., San Francisco.
ENRIGHT'S
STRAW BURNING ENGINES
I RESPECTFULLY beg leave to Inform the public
and parties intending to purchase
Portable Straw-Burning Engines,
For threshing purposes fo" 1878. that I ofer for sale
this senson STKAw-B L'RN'I NG ENGINES, superior
to any I have heretofore made, at reasonable prices,
and that I will gl ve a satisfactory bond to any party
buyinK an Enelue from me or my agents, and that I
will protect them In the use and right of using, and
against all Patent law suits.
JOSEPH ENRIGHT. San Jose, Cal.
PATENT ADJUSTABLE BUGGY TOP.
rymS BUGGY TOP 13 LIGHT, STRONG AND
-1 durable. Adapted to scats of all classes of vehi
cles. Si different sizes. Irlce SU5. Orders
filled by e.rpres C. O. D. Llberi discount to the
trade. Agents W nU'd lu California. Oregon. Nevada.
Colorado, I'tah, Wyoming, Washington. Idaho. Ari
zona and New Mexico. Address J. F. PLCMBE,
Manufacturer and Proprietor, corner Main and Fol
som streets, San Francisco, Cal.
MOODY" & FAKISH,
COMMISSION MERCHANTS,
210 UavU tttreet.
- Nan Franrlsco.
Wool Bazs. Twine, Sheep Shears, Sheep Washses,
Sulphur and Tobacco for sale.
Ns.elty Beefsteak hprerer.
It will positively mate the tough
est stea k tender. It is a perf ect suc
cess. Testimonials from parties us
lng It would fill a volume. No. 1,
Family Size, 5tc No. 2, Hotel size,
SI. Samples sent In box, with circu
lars, etc.. postage paid. AGENT3
WANTED. Beware of counterfeits
and spurious Imitations. The genu
ine Improver can easily be recog
nized by date of patent on handle
and eonenve Ktel nuttlncr.rwl.ita
TOM WILSON, SC9 W. Ukm ttu, Chuato, fuauu and bola Maori.
CAN BE MADE
Every Day!
Vsinir tho Tirnv
Well Bori.no end
CHIXR. ThA lfthmr la oil HrtnA .--!. -v .. .
iRht swindle. ou pet your money's worth, ia
machinery and tools. Cirenlnrs Im.
Address. IXO.HlS fc SwjiA.V Tiffin, Ohio.
OPIUM, MQRPHINEor LAUDANUM
Hiabit Cured!
Without pain, prostration or loss of business, "all
correspondence strictly confidential." Prion from
8 to 620 per montn money refunded if patient
Is not relieved. Address ioclc Box 1014. or rail np
on E. P. ItrswELL.SOa Mason St. tsan Francisco.
R. HOE CO.'S CHISEL
Tooth Mill Eduer and Shop
Saws. Warranted Superior to
all others. R Hoe ic Co.'s
Printing Preses, c. Albany
Lubricating Compound and
Cups. World Standard Cylin
der Oil. Send for Circulars.
I.1..TATI1M A OO...M Frrnmnl ...
V.
-A.. LOZIEE,
Importer and Dealer in Foreign and Do
mestic KIItI. Good Talkins Parrots
always on hand. Good Slnsini? Canary
Birds a hpccialty. SentC. O. D. to any
part of the country. Send for Price List,
4l Kearny Street, San F rancls. o.
AGEUTS-P,7oa WANT THE BEST LINE
I of Chromos and Frame in
America!' Do yon want the lowest prices and fr-ee
outfit) f If so. address
ALBERT DURKEE CO.,
H Monroe Street. Chlc&fro
FIRE
COMPRESSED COFF
ABSOIUTELY PURE
The Compressed Coffee Is In no sense an extract or preparation from, coffee, but simply the best
carefully selected, roasted, ground and compressed after a formula which at once fixes ami permanent re
tains all I ts exhilarating and refreshing qualities, among which are caifeone (the volatile oil) and the ca'fiel'
acid (or astringent property ) which lose nearly If not qnite all their virtues before rhey reach the table of
the consumer. In any of the old methods of preparing colfe for immediate use. This fact Is well understood
by experienced coffee men, and to supply the tiiiavoHinhle deficiencies, chiccory. stale bread rve certain
barks and other foreign substances have been added. In the way of adulteration, until now the pedpfe scarce
ly know what pure cotfee is. And with the belief thit dealers and the best class of consumers will welcome
and sustain me in my efforts to supply a pure, wholesome and delicious article, 1 now otfer it direct to the
public, at tne same price as ihe various kinds of prepared cotre.
This coffee is an equal mixture of the very best Java and Costa R1ca. and Is put up in handsome stvle.
under the brand or "MOCHA yUALIT V," and those who once use It will call for no other It Is rture rich
delicious and wholesome. It never falls to give satisfaction when properly prepared It' la healthful It
saves money. It is put up in convenient packages for use. .
For Sale by all Grocers and at the Manufactory.
51 FREMONT STREET, SAN FRANCISCO.
A. P. ADAMS, Patentee and Manufacturer.
UNIVERSITY MOUND COLLEGE
RAN FltANCisrn '
HTFor Catalogue, apply to
JOII.V UAnilLE, K. A., ITJncipai
BUSINESS COLLEGE.
QOA POST STREET, SAN FRANCISCO. THI
OZiJ oldest and most complete Commercial Col.
lege on the coast. Elegant halls; new rurniture; thor
ough instruction ; practical teachers; hlh standlna
with the public. Students can commence at e-i
time. Day and evening session. Circulars may be
bad free on application.
KELLY STEEL BARBED WIRE
The Best and Cheapest. Send for Circukr.
UlXTIXOTO, IIOPUI.VS A CO.,
San Francisco and Racrnmen to. General Azes'a
Pacific Coact. ror
Oil for Family Use.
NONPAREIL VSi
A OT"P AT 0,IL' 150 dpK- F!re Tm
a1J JL Xi fl 14 In 1, 2, and 3 gallon cam.
UlA V UL O Faucet and Plain
PRATT'S KAM,AXT M"
GF.OKGE 3f. BLAKK, Agent,
123 California St.. Room 13.' - Saw Fbakcisoti
LATTIN SPRING BED,
SOMETHING XEW. THE BEST IX rSE. EN- I
dorsed by all flrst-clas dealersssr Price from $4 tj S
fj. Warranted for 10 years, hend for Circulars tu t
1029 Market Street, Kail FrancUco.
CAROLAN, CORY & Co
1MPOBTBBS OF
XJFLOTsT JSJ2TJZD STEEL.
Agents for Pittsburg Steel Works.
117 and 119 California t. ,
MAW Fit AX CI SCO.
AMERICAN EXCHANGE HOTEL
SAN FRANCISCO.
HIS old and popular hotel has for a quarter of s
-I century ratered to the want? of the public. Tims.
Prtax, an old Cahfornian and an eierienced per
tleman. conducts the house, which ia a sufficient guar-
auiee mui
Comfort, Good Living-, Cleanliness
And the general welfare of guests will he ac"ordd to
all. The tsble will he furnished owith the best tbe
market affords. Oentiemanly and obliging clerKs aril
careful waiters in attendance. This honseis the most
centrally located of any in the citr. Street cars ps.
the door every two minutes. The hotel coach will
carry passengers to and irnm the hou-e free of charts.
Prices from 1.50 to S.5l per day.
TEE FOOTUGHT
THE RECOGNIZED
DRAMATIC ORGAN
Of ths Parlllc Coast.
Contains IIoue Programme of principal Theatrfa
and places of Amusement of San Francisco: Theat
rical eoseip and general review of cm rent evenain
the Dramatic World. Send for sample copy.
Annual Subscription 8 OO
Per Month so
In AdTSnrc.
Address
FOOTLIGHT PUBLISHING CO.,
320 Sansome Mt.. Kan Franrlsco.
AGENTS WANTUDI
TO SOLICIT PICTURES
FOB
Copying-, Enlarging and Retouching-.
ar tne nest worn and highest comtnlss'O'' veu
on this i oast. Address "COPVISti," 7 O'f r
r 1 Nt rf . )u raurlseo.
N. CURRY Sl BRO.
113 Sansome Street, Saa Francisco,
MmDortera and Dealers In every descrip
tion of
Hrreeh and .Wanls-LoadlsK
RIFLES. SHOT-GUNS AND PISTOLS
P. N. P. Co., (New Series),
No. 12
Mineral Specimens
FOR Til C
MICROSCOPE,
Well mountel on glass, for sale in boxes of one dozen.
Send for dcscrimlve circular, or cil! af 5-tl Cslif'"'"--nta
St.S. F. CHARLES II. DEXISON.P. O. Box 2,010.
. , Sax Francisco, August 10. IS...
A. 7. Adam; Esq.;
Having given your Compressed Coffee a thorough
trial, with the happiest retutn, l would say ihat, iu
richness and de'icacy of flavor, it surpasses anythirr
we have ever used. It is cheaper than other coflee
because of its greater strength and its extraordinary
k-e-ping qualities, which womd make it very desira
ble to small consumers. While the Compresxed Coffee
can he had we shall ure no other.
Respectfully, P. Bramish.
213U Howard Street.
Mr.
San Francisco, December S,
A. P. Adams:
Having been a lover and ncr of coffee for the past
twenty years, and having tried nearly everything in
the line of coffee during that time. I'csn safely ?
that 1 consider yonr colive superior to any that I hsv
ever used: there is a delicacy of flavor and rU-hnee
to yonr coffee ibar I have never heeo able t' obtain In
other brands f coffee. Yuura, repecifn ly,
Thomas J. Jouxstox.
San Francisco, December 18"s
ifr. A. r. Adam:
I have used your Compressed Coffee and And lf
delicious article: and as soon as I get my lot f 1
coffee used up (irftfcA it in the bean) I will use your
Compressed, as It is economical, and f a most deli
cious flavor. GlOBRX F. BCMlKIt.
la De Boom Mrcet.
Mr. A. r. Afiam:
Sir .-I have tried yonr Compressed Coffee, snd with
out qualification whatever, pronounce it ttrlit iivt. I
cons.der it the bachelor' boon, for It is alirait readp,
eail-i and qvlckly mane, and will tot oeterlorsto by
exposure. Toura, traly,
O. D. Pltmptos.
EE