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About Oregon City enterprise. (Oregon City, Or.) 1871-188? | View Entire Issue (Aug. 27, 1875)
A . - ' -. -- " ' ' K ' a , iCT0M) ifi r frnn nrnrr tntir'- ; DEVOTED POLITICS, NEWS, LITERATURE, AND THE BEST INTERESTS OF OREGON. "V. 0 1 VOL. 9. THE ENTERPRISE. LOCAL DIM0C.1ATIC NEWSPAPER VOU THE Farmiir, Bnshess Man, & Family Circle. ISSUED EVERY FRIDAY. JV. NOLTXER, JtDITORU ND P UJi L IS ITER. osticial rjjPss roa clacxamas co. OFFICE-ll I Enterprise Building, one Terrrof Subscription! Slngls Copy One Year. In Advance ?2.50 Six Months ... 1.50 Tcrra of Advertising! Transient advinismnts. Including all tegal aotu , squaru of twelve lin one rjek 2.50 Far a-h -ub.s"!o.ucut insertion.- .. 1.00 OotColu:nQ,o.i year 1J0.00 iiiif i' " oo.'W 0irtr " A 40.00 12.00 uaiueas Card7 square, oue year... SOCIETY NOTICES. OKCGON LOICI3 XO. 3, I. I. O. 1'., Meets every Thursday eveuin-cat 74 o'clock, in tho -j Odd Fellow' 1UU. Main fj tret. Me:n!ersof the Or- ' " ' ' der aro invited to attend. I5y order S.G. REUKCCA UI:GCU LOli NO. 3, I. O. O. F., Meets on the MoTStm Sscond and Fourth Tues- rfJzXI Aav evening each month, at 7 4 olor?K.; in the Odd w"' "' Fellows' 1 1 all. Members of tho Decree r invited to uttond. MULTNOMAH LODUH XO. !, A. I". fc A. M., Holds its regular com- A mutiic.it ion .m the First and T;iird .Saturday. in each month, at 7 o'clocSc from theOth of Sep. tomUir to the :Kh of March ; and 74 o'clock from the J0th of March to the 2flth of September, brethren in good btandin.4 aro iuvited to attend. liy order of W. M. FA 1. 1. S IZ X U V M?"l i: XT XI). I , I. O. O. F., Meet at Odd Fellows' -o Hall on the First and Third Tues- JoT dav of each month. Patriarchs s in jjood standing are invited to attend. T '.. . P . . i V H I 2 X SS CARD S. A. J. HOVER, M. I. J. W. NOJIRIS. M. D. 1LOVEK; fc NORR1S, l'cIYHIClNS AND sntuIJOXS, eior;'..-.' lTp-Hta';rs in Charman'x Drick, hi in rf"!. i lr. Uovt-r's rt-ii-iiCo Third stroi-t, at foot of clitf sta:ri-ay. tl" Dr. 3 PAT. K , IMiysician Sc surgeon. OPyiOli Next t' t' Jiurnn j8 Storr, R :si l.Tie Ovt-r ". Fili's s'orc. Main St. Kutraiic; :i tfii-jsitl ?. Th? Doctor i Hxamlnin Surgeon frsr r-:iio.-.i. '- "xaaiitiation (''.'.. -jit "i.k-n-nial" :ki J "l'-ri'Mlieal") can u- mad-? with out sp"ci it or.J -rs iroin th XVn.sion iiurcau WaiUiustoii. 1. C I)K. JOIITS: WELCH DENTIST, OKK1CK IN' OllKCiO.V t'lTY, ORECiON. Hi;:irU( U.i. Ii-ico Pai.l f jr Caunty OrJur.. ATTOHNF.V 1D; COL'XSELOR-AT-LAW, Oregon City, Oregon. Spee!l attention f;ivn to loaning Mnn?y. 0no Front room In Kxteiumuse UuilU jnj. JulviDtf S. II II ELA T ATTORN EY-AT-LAW: OREaOIl CITY, - 03juN. rrOKFlCE-Chirnnn's brick. Main st. 5marlS7i :tf. JOHNSON & .VJcCOWN ATTOHNEfS AD;C0L"SEL0aS AT-LAW. Orogon Oltyf Oregon. "Will practice ia all the Courts of the Htat. Sp-cial attimtioa given to cases in th 17. S. Ind O.Jl.t hi or.-go:i City. q aayrlSTJ-tf. Xj. T. 15 A II I IS" ATTORNEY-AT-LAW, OREGOX CITY, : : OREGON. OFF ICE Over Pope's Tin Storo, Main treet. 21mar73-tf. AV. II. 1IIGHFIELD. Established alnce 'lO. At the old stand. Miia Street, Oregoa City, Oregon. 5 An asortmnt of Wathes, ,Twel gJV ry.and Sth '.'- homas' Wright Clocks a- .'l aH of which are warranted to be as r-pr-s"ntd. , '"lt':'pairin lon- n short notice, and tn lakful for past pf-.tronajje. J 0UX 3L IUC0X, IMPORTF.R ,Vni1EAI.r.Il In Books, Stationery, rcrfu'ai- ry. etc.. etc. JWr'riftrl Orou Clj-, Orojon. V.A.tthe Post Oflice, Main stgeet, east side. RESVIOVAL. ALFHEO K1.HHEY, M. D., SITRGEO:, UA? nFA'OVED! II TS OFFICE AND Residence to th double hous, -V W. Corner of AMerand E st Iorl J'roft, PortHnd. (reu-on. wh"P he can be nd at all hours, day and night. May a. 1375 ;lna j J to iOri Pilay at home. Tertns 'Xi ' fr(- Address ' G. fsTIN-fiON A Co., Portland. M A an-!. Political False Pretences. The following from the San Fran cisco Examiner may prove interest ing to the Whitneyites: The opinion of one who has grown old in such service to the people as may be rendered in a half centu ry's devotiou to their interests in the capacity of a non-party journalist, independent of party favor, and who may be aid to have witnessed, al most the birth of parties in this conntry, and watched their develop ment and fate, is certainly entitled to more serious consideration, and infinitely greater weight, than are the views of newly-tledged aspirants for political advancement who sub ordinate public interests to their own, and raise a clamor aguinst par ty organization to distract attention from thf-ir own efforts to obtain po litical preferment. The venerable New York Evening Post, wliose editor speaks from more than fifty years' experience of the workings of parties, in its issues of the 4t!i inst., sharply criticises the position of Senator Booth, as defined in his recent speech in San Francis co. "An Independent" party should by the conditions of its existence, re frain from all attempts to lay down or maintain "general principles." It is independent of all regular parties. It is a protest against them. Its corner-stone is i regularity. The moment it ceases to be exceptional and occasional it becomes itself a regular party. Its permanence is destructive of its independence. Plainly, then, it has nothing to do with general principles. The only successful 'independent' movements known to political history are those which have resulted from a sudden and swift impnlse toward a single, simple purpose nhich. according to prevailing popular opinion, has over shadowed all other interests and to the accomplishment of which the people have ben willing to postpone for the time all differences on other subjects." Referring to the move ment which carried tho eltcfion in New York City just after the down fall of the Tweed "ring" three years ao, the writer says: "How far that movement was successful we shall not undertake to say, but this is cer tain: The movement conl 1 not sur vive until another election. It spent its force in one. In the nature of things an independent party cannot address itself to the varied and com plex questions which make up the politics of a community. To do that it inn't nwnme the responsibilities of a regular party and forfeit inde pendence, in tho political sense of the term that is, independence of parties and party machinery." R:ferring to the experiment of an indepenllet party in California, the viter declares it impossible to read Senator Booth's address without being impressed with the embarrass ment which beset the 'People's In dependent Party,' and the difiiculty under which the Senator labored in ndvocationg its cause. lie could, indeed, scarcely state its claims with out statins: itself out of court. Qnot inpr Mr. Booth's assertion that the incledendent movement is a protest ncrainst party discipline, etc., the Post asks: "Now, in what way ex cept by discipline which in the broad sense includes every tiling which the term 'organization' im plies does the People's Independ ent Party expect to elect Mr. John Bidwell Governor? whom by the way, Mr. Booth eulogizes in the old fashioned party style. If the Sena tor and his associates devote them selves industriously to upholding the 'sacredness of individual liberty in the right of every California citi zen to vote for somebody other than Mr. John Bid well, how will they therebv promote the elevation of Mr. John Bidwell to the executive chair of the State? But do they really rec ognize any larger liberty in the mat ter than does any regular party? Are they not, on the contrary, employing all the other instrnmeutalites, such as committees, conventions, mass meetings, speeches, resolutions and appeals? They assert, it is true, that none of the members of the par ty owe it allegiance except as it does right, but do not the leaders of the regular parties say as much? As to the party lash or political thumb screw, would the 'independent' man agers wholly abstain from using them? Suppose they win in the next election. Will they appoint their own adherents to office, or will they magnanimously distri bute all the patronage among recrn lar Democrats and Republicans? We take for granted that they will pre fer members of their own party. We should not think of blaming them for so doing, but would not it pe an application of the figurative 'lash' and thumb-screw'? Orsu2pose that before election -day, Mr. Booth, or any other Independent should choose on the ground, of 'the sacredness of individual liberty' to apandou Mr. John Bidwell, go over to the enemy and vote for somebody else. Would not the faithful Independents char acterize him as a traitor and a rene gade? We have no doubt that they would, and we believe, politically speaking they would do right. But while employing this kind' of pres sure and other party influences to enforce discipline and secure the success which only numbers can give, with what fuce could they de voutly thank heaven that in all es sential party trails and methods the 'People's Independent Party' was not as other parties, even as the reg ular Democrats and Republican's?" Without questioning the motive of the Independent party, the writer advises it to avoid carrying on busi ness upon political false - pretences. It is a party , to all intents . and pur poses, and therefore it should not pretend that it 15 Dona. "It may ' Be OREGON CITY, ig r I'eral. but while it does last it maintains a party organi zation, employs party methods, en forces party discipline, rewards its FnrMr J enemies. For Mr. Booth to state its case by asserting tuat, in all essential traits, it is not a party, as we have said al ready, to state it out of court. If it is not a party, with the machinery of a party, proposing to do certain 1 things and with that view to elect candidates, it has no claim to popu lar support or to any consideration whatever. There is no cheaper cant than that of no party. Mr. Booth knows very well, ns every intelli gent citizen knows, that it is impos sible to do anything, under any sys tem but that of a despot;sm, except by means of parties. Therefore he has put himself at the head of the Peoples Independent Party.' Evi dently he expects his party to be permanent, because he endeavors to found it on broad general principles. It must, therefore, as we have shown be a regular party, and we advise him to drop the word 'independent from its title. We might differ from Mr. Booth as to the probable perma nence of his party. What exactly it proposes to do abont the railroad and other corporations which it de nounces, his speech does not enable us to fully understand. Enough is said, however, to suggest a miscon ception not only of our own institu tion, but of all reasonable popular government." Natural History, as Cleaned from an Oregon City IJojs Composition. Tho mouse is a shrunken rat, he chews more old newspapers than an editor. The turtle is more attached to his home than an Esquimaux. He makes very good soup but a poor racer barring the one Mr. Aesop saw. Providence does not give all the ad vantages to one animal. - The Goose Some people think the goose is a jackass. When well roast ed she is my favorite bird. The Parrot I never heard a parrot say its prayers, but my cousin knows a boy whose eo;isin once heard a parrot say a bad word. The canary sings loudest when people want to sleep. It gets stuffed when it dies. I would rather get stuffed during life, wouldn't you? The Eagle, because he is a high flier, is called the boss bird. My cousin's friend says he'll bet big money that his red pyle can knock the rilling out of the biggest eagle that "soars o'er the abyss." The Cat originated in Venice. Somebody has fooled all the cats in our neighborhood by telling them that they are good s'ingers and that our family likes to hear them. The c;its around our way get very fat when they die. They look as if they died of something on the stomach probably wind, introduced by a pair of bellows. The Crane is a modest bird. He has loug, bare legs which he tries to hide by wading into the water. The stag bristles with a whole arm ory, but like men who go armed, is a better runner than tighter. The Penguin is uncomfortably sit uated on the rocks of Patagonia. His chief products are penguins and gu auo. He is chiefly used as a design for camel's hair shawls. Birds sit down on their feet; boys do not. The Mnsquito is the most philan thropic of all insects. The Polecat (Father says I had better let this subject alone.) Horrors of African Travel. Col. Long, in describing his recent journey to the interior of Africa and tho vicinity of the land of the pig mies, thus describes the hardships he underwent: "To cross Atmour is a fearful undertaking, I assure you. For 150 miles the route, though painful, is in close proximity to the river, and thus we have water for 200 miles. Leaving. Abon Hamed, where the river describes a great arc westward, we are obliged to cross a bleak, barren sea of sand, so suffocat ing and hot that tne thermometer will scarcely register the heat. Great simoons or khamseens blow with roaring sounds their hot breath, and cause your skin to crack like parch ment. On all sides a sea of sand, bordered only by delusive mirages that lead many to their death, for there is no well or water (save one half-way, like epsom salts, and none but camels may drink it) ; then we have water for eight days, carried on camels' backs in goat-skins. The camel, a patient, hard-working ani mal, without which it would be im possible to cross a desert, still has not the extraordinarj- powers attrib uted to him, and i3 water-proof only for two or three c.ays, dying on the fourth. Thousands thus perish, and the road for the whole distance shows live to ten carcasses for every mile, bleached bones that indicate the deadly route. Added to this is the fearful sea-saw movement. A forced march is necessary, and day and night, with occasional naps and stops for the purpose of eating black bread and onions and drinking our nearly putrid water all this may not give you the slightest conception of this march. The personnel of the President's committee to investigate the charges brought by Prof. Marsh against the Indian Department does not appear to inspire a vast amount of public confidence that the report will be im partial, and certainly does not meet with much newspaper approbation beyond the mere official organs. But there are,, perhaps, as 'many as two members of ihfs committee who, as a minority,' may be expected .to report the troth, 'so ' far as tlie investigation "shairbnng.it to their ti6w. ' OREGON, FRIDAY, AUGUST 27, 1875. Gen. Alexander Hamilton. The Death of the Son of the First Sec--i.retary of the .Treasury Au Event that iCecalls to Mind the Duel with Restless Aaron Burn 1 General Alexander Hamilton who ilied in this city on Sunday last, was only one of many American Haruil tons who have at various periods in the history of the country shown great alacrity in taking up arms for either their country, their friends or themselves. He was in command of the old Sandy Hook fort in the war 1812, and took part in many of the minor engagements near - the city at tliat time. After the war he went to Spain, and was at the memorable battle before Badajos between the French troops and the English army under Wellington. His father Alexander Hamilton, an adopted citizen, studied artillery at the age of nineteen, and in 1776 be came a captain under Gen. Schuyler in command of the Northern "De partment. He was ia the tight at White Plains, and after having lost nearly all his men at Trenton and Princeton and in tho retreat across the Raritan, he became an aid to Washington, and was at Monmouth and Yorktown. While he was a Rev olutionary soldier he bore a chal lenge to Gen. Lee from Gen. Lau rens, and acted as second to Laurens in the duel that followed. lie be came commander-in-chief of the army on the death of Washington in 1709 ami in 1S04 lost his life in a duel with Aaron Burr, jnst two years after the death of his eldest son, Schuyler, in a similar "affair of hon or." James Hamilton of South Caro lina, who was drowned at sea some twenty years ago, was a major in the war of 1812, served as Mayor of Charleston and member of the Leg itlature for several years, and in 1SJ2 was sent to Congress. In tho cele brated duel between John Randolph and Henry Clay, he acted as second to Randolph. His death was a no ble one. When on his way to Texas after having spent his fortune in her service, the steamer came in collision with another. With the courtesy and gallantry that always distin guished him, he yielded his own chauce of safety to a lady, and went down to bis death without a mur mur. The Gen. Alexander Hamilton who lias just died, was born on the lCtu of May, 17SG. From the time of his return from Europe in 1820 he lived a retired life in this city, spending much of his time at his county seat in New Brunswick, N. J. He leaves no children, and his heirs are his three brothers, James A., aged S3, who lives on the estate in Irvington; John C. aged 85 who lives in this city; and Philip, aged 73, who lives in Poughkeepsie. . . About Hoarding Houses. You will observe that the weather is invariably cloudy when the land lady tells you that old, old story of having seen better days. You will not believe her, however, when yon see her scoop up the pie with her hand. She measures her attention to boarders by their celerity in pay ing to grab, betrays indebtedness. Landladies have a very incorrect idea of the calendar, seeming to think as they put hash balls before you under the name of chicken croquettes that every other day is the lirst of April. Look with suspicion upon the question "will you be at home to dinner to-day Mr, Soandso?" There is a hidden motive in it, she is counting noses. When your landlady insinuatingly asks at desert, "Pie or padding Mr. Flipma?" Answer boldly, "a little of both if you please" you will never regret it. Experience has taught me that boarding house chickens aro born with more than two legs. If the landlady has a daughter, strain every exertion to win her af fection; engage yourself to her if it must be (not for "keeps" only for "hugs") for on this depends your getting tho tender cuts and the big gest piece of pie. Rienzi exclaimed to the Romans: "Friends, I came not here to talk!" Let this be your motto at the boarding house table. It any one at the table has a pri vate jar of preserves, innocently help yonrself and pass it along. Such temerity will be forgiven in a new comer. Suspect the landlady whose servants are continually leaving her suddenly. 'Tis but an artifice to have the stale bread and cold meat eaten up. Don't eat with your knife, the boarders will take you for the circus sword-swallower, and the cir cumspect landlady, through fear of losing her Toledo blade will have it chained to the table. In a short time a book written by Mr. Lewis, the f tinny man of the De troit Free Press, will make its appear ance. The following is the dedica tion: "To the Pawnee Tribe of Indians,- whose enterprise, talent and statesmanship, coupled with the fact that they rise early, go to bed late and are always aro nnd when wanted, and who . cheerfully roasted one of my ancestors at the 6take, without reward or hope of reward, is this volume respectfully dedicated by the author." Of Course She Did. A middle aged woman fell as she was descend ing a pair of stairs on Jefferson j avenue yesterday, and the first man to help her reach her feet was a banker "who happened to be pass ing. - - "Did you fall, madam?" he in quired as he seized her arm. "Fall ! of course I fell, yon fool, you! You don't suppose I'd sit dovvn hero to rest, 36 yooTVshe snapped. He didn't say. COURTESY OF BANCROFT LIBRARY, tumtvttpsttY OF CALIFORNIA, Flirtation. No woman can carry on a flirtation with a married man that is not crim inal. No woman can flirt innocently ! even with a young man. It is the I first step toward unbalancing his ! characte. Through her he sees other women and forms an estimate. The voung woman who enters a fam ily and wins the affections of the husband and father knowingly and she can not do otherwise has enter ed on the road to uerdition. There isa punishment for the housebreaker, 1 but none for tne uomeureauer, wlio steals and mars life's best treasures. Every woman has the. best right to her husband. He is hers in sickness and hers in health, to love and cher ish, as exclusively as if she be his. He is to provide for her, honor and love her. He is her protector against all tho adverse circumstances of life; no other woman has any right to his attentions. A man who saw another man's arm around his wife's waist would consider it a case of court, or an exercise for pistol shooting. Wo men, with keener sensibilities and finer nature, feel it deeper. It touches tho heart. A certain sensible woman says there are two things she will never allow anybody to meddle with her husband and her sewing machine. Such flirtations are unworthy of true manhood or womanhood. They blight the lives that were created iu the image of God and make the in nocent suffer for the guilty. All mothers will do well to see that their daughters are not mentally growing up on the morbid books in which somebody is alvv j-s represented as falling in love with somebody else's husband or wife, and a "soul union" picture which is intended to veil the incornation of lust. There are enough men and women to fall by force of circumstances or the deprav ity of original sin, without educat ing any to it. It is well enough to pull our ox or ass out of the pit; but we do not want to dig pits for them to fall into. Many a soul has gone blood stained into the preseuce of its Maker, sent thither by a climax of dark circum stances brought about by a woman's flirtation. Don't flirt. It is unwo manly; it is untrue to your sex; it is wrong against the mother yon revere. The man whom you are tempting will not respect you, and worse, you will not respect yourself. Silent Hen. Washington never made a speech. In the zenith of his fame he ouce attempted it, failed, and gave it up confused and abashed. In framing the Constitution of the United States the labor was wholly performed in the committee of the whole, of which George Washington was the chair man, but he made two speeches dur ing the Convention of a very few words each. Tho convention, how ever, acknowledged the master spirit, and historians affirm that, had it not been for his personal popularity and thirty words of his lirst speech, pro nouncing it the best that could be united upon, the Constitutiou would have been rejected by the people. Thos. Jefferson never made a speech. He couldn't do it. Napoleon, whose exeevtive ability is almost without parrllel, said that his greatest diffi culty was in finding men of deeds rather than of words. When asked how he maintained his influence over his superiors in ago and experience when Commander-in-Chief of an ar my in Italy, he said by reserve. The greatness of man is not measured by the length of his speeches and their number. The Lamented Gloster. While the horses were trotting on the track, a little group of horse men on the grand stand were dis cussing the merits of the noted horse Gloster who died in California. Gloster's old driver was in the com pany and he evinced much feeling when referring to the lamented trot ter. He said that Mr. Goldsmith, Glosters's first owner, had the ani mal's tail hanging up in his sitting room, and that Budd Doble had egg cups and an inkstand made out of hoofs and uses them daily, and an other great admirer of the animal has a pair of boots, a pair of shoes and two pairs of slippers made of his hide. Mr. Sargent, who drove Glos ter, told how the horse beat Gold smith Maid at Chicago in private, and how he was kept back in all the races so that the Maid should not be beaten in public. There is no doubt whatever that if he had lived he would have trotted a mile this sea son in 2:13. All agreed that he would have been the fastest horse in the world. Pouglikeepsie EriyZe. It was a bad day for Chorpenning and his ring when Mr. Landanlet Williams went out of the Attorney General's office. Had Williams re mained, they might have got away with a half million or so of plunder, in spite of Jewell, and come back for more; but Mr. Pierrepont has shut down upon them, with a good deal of emphasis, and the next Congress will be a bad one for them to go to for help. An Indiana girl wanted to see if her lover really loved her. and she got a boy to yell "mad dog!" as they were walking out. The lover flew over a fence and left her to be chewed up. and she went right away and married a store clerk. 4 . An Oregon man named his girl Kabv after Oueen Victoria. and wrot i fTio Onpftn to that effect. Sh didn't I seem to care a cent, and he changed 1 the child's name to "Sal" and went out and potmaea,tne nrst English man he met. Postal Changes. Postage is reduced on all Foreign Letters between the United States and Great Britain, Germany, Austria, Hungary, Belgium, Denmark, Egypt, Spain, Greece, Italy, Norway, the Netherlands, Portugal. Russia, Swe den, Switzerland and Turkey, as fol lows: Letters, 5 cents each, half ounce prepaid. Letters, 10 cents each half ounce unpaid. Postal Cards, 2 cents each always prepaid. . Newspapers, 2 cents each not over four ounces prepaid. Printed matter and merchandise 2 cents for each two ounces prepaid. KEGISTEREB LETTERS. Registry Fee, foreign and do mestic, 10 cents each letter without regard to weight. MONEY OliDEES. Domestic Rates on orders not exceeding S15. 10 cents. Domestic Rates over $15 and not exceeding S30, 15 cents. Domestic Rates over $10 and not exceeding 50, 25 cents. Foreign Orders can be obtained for Great Britain and Switzerland at the following rates. On orders not exceeding S10. 25 cent3. On orders over $10 and not exceed ing $20, 50 cents. On orders over $20 and not exceed ing $30, 75 cents. On orders over $30 and not ex ceeding $10, $1. On orders over $10 and not ex ceeding $50. $1 25. For Germany at the same rates, with the exception that on orders not exceeding $15,15 cents only will be charged. On and after August 2d, orders can he obtained for the Dominion of Canada, for which International business Boston is an Exchange Office. Postage Rates to Franco will no! bo changed until January 1st, 1876. a . -o- Sleep Necessary. "A man who would be a good worker," says Henry Ward Beecher, "must be a good sleeper. The qual ity of mental activity depends upon the quality of sleep. Men need on an average eight hours of sleep a day. A lymphatic man is sluggish, moves and sleeps slowly. But a nervous man acts quickly in every thing, lie does more in an hour than a sluggish man in two hotirs, and so in his sleep. Every man must sleep according to his tempera ment but eight hours is the average. Whoever by work, pleasure, or sor row, or by any other cause, is regu larly diminishing his slep, is de stroying his life. A man may hold out for a time, but the crash will come, and he will die. There is a great deal of intemperance besides that of tobacco, opium or brandy. Men are dissipated who oveitax their system all day, and undersleep every night." Kxtractfrom an Kiirlishmans Letter. Of course yon have noticed the peculiar pronunciation aud nomen clature throughout tho States? The map 13 filled with towns of "Eng lish root and French termination, such as Centreville, Malinville, Mc Cartysville, which to me, as a Brit isher, appears as ludicrous as a sailor with a stove-pipe hat. Our language is replete with terminations, such as burg, borough, ton, field, town, &c. and I see no excuse you Americans can offer for bastardizing our tongue. If Louisville is considered French, why not pronounce it accordingly Luiveal? Or if it is to be anglicized, why not boldly say Lewisvill not trying to effect a compromise between the two languages with Luivill? St. Louis, too, is made a hermaph rodite in the same way; it is not giv en the French Saunt Lui, nor the English Santo Lewis, but in the American tongue becomes Sante Lui neither fish nor flesh. Mr. Disreali in his speech at the meeting of the Byron memorial com mittee, said of the poet: "If he fell, which he undoubtedly did, into many erroneous conclusions upon Divine subjects, it may be urged for him that he was very young. I remember once Lord Lyndhurst discussing the character and career of Mr. Canning, and then asking some one who was present what was the precise age at which Mr. Canning died. He was told that, he died at the age of fifty six. 'What!' said Lord Lyndhurst, then advanced in life, but yet in the fulness of his complete capacity, 'only fifty-six! Why, he was a mere boy.' But wo must remember that when Byron died he was twenty years younger than Mr. Canning, and in any speculations upon his character and career this element in that wonderful character and mar velous career should never bo omit ted." At a camp-meeting last summer, a venerable sister began the hymn " My soul be on thy guard. Ten thousand foes arise." She began in shrill quavers, but it was pitched too high. "Ten thous and Ten thousand," she screeched, and stopped. "Start her at 5,000!" cried a converted stock broker pres ent. Curran was once asked by one of his brother judges. "Do you see anvthing ridiculous in this wig? "Nothing but the he-d was tho re ply. . Unluckt ax Last. "Lucky. Bald win," of San Francisco, was robbed :of 32,000 while at tke Poaghkeepsie raceB'last wBek. - - NO. 44. Fragment of a Letter Found In Ore gon Cii3". To our sunburnt Abigails, have I, by their respective selves been ap pointed Chief Scribe, Lord High Keeper of Secrets and Master of Cor respondence. I have already engaged the cook to two different fellows (unknown" to her), while the dashing chamber maid, owing to my bold advances, is to be married next month. One rather deserving young Hottentot ruined Ins chances with me (conse quently with her) by betraying the principles of an Intrasigente. Thia communistic Othello, this black Red, first betrayed his wretched religion by his contempt for all established rules of orthography. Don't say you admire hi-s independence or I'll send you one of his letters. If there is any possibility of misspelling a word or any unnatural shape into which a series of letters can be tw-sted, this iconoclast will accomplish the feat with ease. I suppose he might be said to write in an easy, flowing style, for he overlooks punctuation entire ly, as a matter savoring too much of Dutch billiards (as you used to call a bagatelle) for a master mind. There being no stoppages for breath. I sus pect the sinister designs of the vil lain to be to get people to strangle trying to read his eiiusions aloud. His use of capitals is perfectly para lyzing. Being rather of an lesthetic than utilitarian nature, he puts them where they look t!f pre'ttiest not "whero they do tho most good." When a page is finished,' he perfects it.s appearance by throning in, in a haphazard, devil-may-care style, a parenthesis or two, and to heighten the optical effect occasionally jabs a capital into tho middle of a word. As for grammar, I think he can play more pranks with poor Lindley Mar ry in fewer inches of paper than any blackamoor in the hemisphere. The ordinary double negative is quadru pled with him, and he so mixes the moods, tenses, cases and persons that it is difficult to teil whether he is trying to draw a kleidoscoxie or make a Fish House puneh. Before I forget it, in every letter he introduces a pet word "deleer yum," for instance, was Lis last favorite and this he uses without "a blush of conscience" four and five times in a sentence. Facetious dog! he springs it upon yon when least expected neither the .sense or anything else justifying its intrusion. Well, after playing "peek-a-boo" in this way through four pages of Chaldee, after snubbing the rules of grammar, and forgetting his punctu ation, after his communistic disre gard for orthographical ruies, would you believe it, tin's bravo, this Pet of the Petroleum Sprinklers, Las got the' modesty, the angelic meekness to seak of himself with a small "i?" The rest was illegible. SUBSCKTF.EP.S IN ArEEARS, PlEASK Remit. How not to stop a paper, aud how to stop ouejo 1. Do not take your paper to the post-master and tell him to send it back. In nine cases out of ten you will fail to stop it in this way. 2. Do not attempt to return it yourself, and write on the wrapper to discontinue.. This is against the law, and lays you open to a fine. 3. Before your subscription ex pires, send to the publisher a postal card, saj'ing .your subscription ex pires on such a date. Please discon tinue at that time. Sigu yonr name, also the town and State where your paper is sent, in lull. If the paper has been sent two weeks or more over the time for which it was paid, don't send a postal card. It will do no good. Rather write a letter and enclose what is due for arrearage, always allowing that ono number will be sent before the letter reaches the publisher and his list is corrected. By observing these simple rules your requests will always be prompt ly attended to, you will have a clear conscience and sleep well, and tho publisher will never be tempted "to take the name of the Lord thy God in vain." It was at a party that some young ladies were discussing the relative benefits of the sparrows and the worms, when one of the fair ones ap pealed to young Fizzleton, who had just joined them, and had not cangh t the drift of the conversation. -"Which do you think the worse, worms or sparrows?" What did the stupid brute do but innocently answer, "I don't know; I never had sparrows." "Do yon get off here?" asked the purser of the steamer City of New port of a lady, as the boat was within two or three hundred rods of Bul lock's Point, Tuesday afternoon. " No," she responded, and just as the purser was about to tell her that she would have to buy a return ticket, she continued," "I get off when the boat reaches the wharf." Has Seen Them. Mark Twain says, "I have seen slower people than I am. and mo.ro deliberate people than I am even quieter, more list less, and lazier than I cm. But they were dead." Lorenzo Day, having married Miss Marthy Week, a local paper com ments: A Day is made, a Week is lost. Iiut time should not complain. There'll soon belittle Davs enough To make the Week again. " John, I came very near selling my shoes the other day, " said one man to another. "How was that?" " Why, I had them half-soled." " I say, Pit, what are yon abont sweeping out the room?" "No," answered Pat; " I am sweeping; oat the dirt ar.d la-nn the room." O O o ( o o O o o o o O IS' O 0 o o f i o o o o .-w