Heppner gazette. (Heppner, Morrow County, Or.) 1892-1912, December 30, 1909, Image 3

Historic Oregon Newspapers

Heppner gazette., December 30, 1909, Image 3

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About Heppner gazette. (Heppner, Morrow County, Or.) 1892-1912 | View Entire Issue (Dec. 30, 1909)

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Newspaper Page Texti SMITH WANTS and will pay aa follows for good, fat stuff we never charga com mission on anything: Veal under 130 lbs 11c Large veal less, according to size and quality. Dressed Hogs 9Jc Hens and Springs, alive 14c Hens and Springs, dressed. . 16 to 16C Turkeys, dressed 22Jc Geese, dressed 15C Ducks, dressed 20C FRANK L. SMITH MEAT CO. "Fighting the Beef Trust" PORTLAND, OREGON. A M tract f Science. Aeroplaning Is another miracle of practical science another Impossibil ity shown to be possible another dreajn of centuries realized, but real ized in a manner which none but this generation could have understood. Will the history of the steam locomo tive repeat Itself? The actual maxi mum speed on railways Is no higher to-day than It was sixty years ago, though, of course, the train loads are very different. Will It be so with the aeroplane? A Peep Abend. They were about to open the Pana ma canal In due form. "What are we waiting for?" asked the man who was to deliver the ora tion. "We are waiting," answered the mas ter of ceremonies In a husky whisper, "to see If we can't scare up a few American built ships to go through first!" Chicago Tribune. MODERN EXPERT DENTISTRY At Prices that Defy Competition lEETH WITHOUT PLATES A SPECIALTY PAINLESS EXTRACTION 60c SILVER KILLINGS 50c up COLD KILLINGS $1.00 up 22K GOLD CROWN S5.00 GOOD RUBBER I'LATE $5.00 THE BEST RUBBER PLATES $8.00 WHALEBONE PLATES $10.00 Out-of-town patient can obtain perfect work and save money by calling at our office. NO STUDEN rS NO GAS. NO COCAINE AH work guaranteed for ten years CHICAGO PAINLESS DENTISTS 323 W Washington St., Cor. Sixth Established 15 yean. Here to stay. A LEADER WATER SYSTEM IN YOUR HOME Means an unfailing water supply. It means that you will have the moot practi cal Domestic waler supply system now in use. No elevated tank, no frozen pipes in winter, no stagnant water in summer, no water supply troubles of any sort. Tank placed in basement, out of sight and way. made of pressed steel, will not rust and will last a lifetime. You will be pleased with the LEADER system of furnishing Domestic Water Supr v. Ask tor our catalogue and free booklet. "How I Solved My Water Nipply Problem. " LEWIS & STAVE R CO. Portland, Ore. Spokane, Wash. Boise, Idaho. THE SAFE WAY To travel East I via the Oregon Railroad & Navigation Company's NEW FAST TRAINS Oregon-Washington Limited Portland to Chicago Chicago-Portland Special Chicago, St. Louis. Etc Soo-Spokane-Portland "Train da Luxe" to St. Paul Latest equipment, Pullman, Tourist and Dining Cars, electric lighted and up-to-date. Block Signal System Portland to Chicago. For literature, rates, reserva tions, etc., call on or write to any O. R. & N. agent, or to WM. McMURRAY General Passenger Agent Portland, Oregon ! RAM'S HORN BLASTS. Warnliiw IVotea CallliiK the Wlekc to Repentance. There are a good many very poo people who have plenty of money If a hair shirt could make saint, the devil would w e a mourning all the time. . The purpose of all education Is to enable us to see' that the world la moving, and show us what It Is moving for. The trials that just about break us are the ones that make us. In most cases we look in the wrong direction for our happiness. The man who fears the light Is al ways running from a shadow. Whatever God's providence gives us to do is something He wants done. The money that does us the most good Is the money with which we do good. Some folks will do anything for th LiO rd except behave themselves at home. When we know that God Is the giver of all good, we shall find good in all Ho gives. Anybody can talk religion, but it takes a true follower of Christ to show what It Is. God provided for the worst that could happen to man before He breathed Into him the breath of life God believes in good cheer or He would not have made hearty laughter about the wholesomest and healthiest thing In the world. i T 2 THE MIGRATORY SENSE. The migration of birds, unlike the migration of human beings, is a very mysterious thing. Flying, as most of the song-birds do, by night, coming and going in great Hocks, and chang ing their locality for no one reason, but for many, the problem of these "tidal waves" in bird, life is wholly fascinating. D. Lange, in the Atlan tic Monthly in discussing some phases of It, speaks as follows concerning the birds' sense of direction: How do birds find their way? There Is no doubt that they are often guid ed by sight along coasts, lakes, riv ers and valleys, which are plainly vis ible for a great distance from the height at which birds travel. In other cases, old birds which have been over the route lead the way, and the young bird3 follow their calls and their leadership. What wonderful stories these wing ed travelers could tell if they could talk to us! What fascinating teachers of geography they would make for our children! It has, however, been shown lately beyond all reasonable doubt that in adidtion to keen sight, acute hearing, individual experience and race instinct, birds possess what must seem to us a kind of sixth sense, the sense of orientation. I The Harrlman Alaska Expedition j found flocks of murres, which are : sea-birds, flying straight for their J home on a lonely rock island thirty i miles away, through a fog so thick j that everything a hundred yards off i was absolutely hidden from view, j What human brain could guide a ship 1 thirty miles through a dense fog with 1 out a compass? ! Still more conclusive demonstration j of this sense of direction in birds has ! recently been furnished by Prof. John B. Watson. He caught and marked i fifteen sooty terns and noddies on the Dry Tortugas, in the Gulf of Mexico, and took them out to sea. Some of the birds were carried as far as Cape i Halteras, eight hundred and fifty miles north of the Tortugas, before they were set free. The sooty terns and the noddies are southern birds, which seldom range farther north than the southern coast of Florida, and it is not likely that any of those experimented on had ever been farther north; but none the less, thirteen out of fifteen found their way back to the Tortugas Islands. Didn't Know, "Well, Mr. Henpeck, what do you think of this Peary-Cook controver sy?" "I really don't know what to think about it." "Difficult to know what to think, isn't it?" "Yes, especially when one's wife is out of town." Houston Post. Excusable Rfarntmtnl. "It's really provoking," said the fond mother, "baby always cries when we have company." "Well." answered Mr. Groucher, "you can't blame chil dren for disliking company. If t weren't for visitors they wouldn't have to recite or play pieces on the piano." The Arithmetical Spirit. "As a rule," said the cynic, "one may reckon the number of his true friends on the fingers of one hand." "Well," answered the good-natured person, "anybody who counts up his friendships the same as he does hla money doesn't deserve any more." When a woman buys a newspaper he thinks she Isn't getting her money's vorth unless she finds the name of somebody she knows among Hood's Sarsaparilla Acts directly and peculiarly on the blood; purifies, enriches and revitalizes it, and in this way builds up the whole system. Take it. Get it today. In URUitl liquid foun or chocolated tab lets called Sarnutubs. 100 Doses . One Sncceaaful Cat, "Doctor, you're not io foolish' as to think you can make people good by performong operations on them, are you ?" "That depends upon what you call making people good. .You can check their disposition to commit crime." "As, for example" "Well, I once knew a man who was cured, by a simple operation, of a ten dency to rob banks and hold up rail way trains." "Did you perform It, doctor?" "No; I was merely called on to ver ify the result after the operation was over." "Well, who did perform it?" "A frontier sheriff." Chicago Trib une. Died mt Klelit -elnrht aa Predicted. Prophesying early in life that she would live to see her eighty-eighth birthday. Miss Julia H. Hancock, ol Brockton, Mass., died a few days ago on the day she had previously set for her death. Infirmities of age are given as tli causa. She gave no particular reason for her prediction, although sh seemed Imbued with the belief that her prophecy would come true. Whof For who, to dumb forgetfulness a prey That letter in his pocket e'er resign ed, Without receiving, on some later day, A gpod-sized portion of somebody's mind? Save This Eecipe for Colds. "Mix half pint of good wliiskev wit two ounces ot glycerine and add one half ounce Concentrated pine compound I he bottle is to he well shaken each time and used in doses of a teaspoonfu to a tablesnoonful everv four hours." Any druggist hits these ingK'dients or he will get them from his wholesale house. This is wonderfully effective. The Concentrated pine is a special pine product and conies only in halt ounce bottles, each enclosed "in an air tight case, but be sure it is labeled ' 'Concentrated. " What' In a .imel An amusing story has been told con cerning Mr. Phillips' classic drama, Ulysses." When it was being played in America, two young girls were sit ting together in the stalls at a matinee performance, and before the curtain rose the following conversation was heard: "Say, Maude, I know this play is going to be funny." "What makes you think so?" asked Maude. "Why anybody could 'tell that from name!" was the rpnlv M. A. P. the The next time you feel that swai owing Bensation, the sure sign of sore throat, gargle Hamlins Wizard Oil im mediately with three parts water. It will save you days and perhaps weeks of misery. 1 En Famine. Willie, a little country boy, 6 years of age, was taken one Sunday night to a large city church, where he saw for the first time a vested' choir. To his mother's surprise and gratification, he not only kept wide awake, but seemed greatly interested in every part of the service. At its close he urned to her and said, "I like this church, it is so nice to watch tha preacher when he comes out with all his wives in their nightgowns." Har per's Magazine. Good for Sore Eyes, for over 100 years PETTIT'S EYE SALVE has positively cured eye dis eases everywhere. All druggists or Howard Bros., Buffalo, N. Y. i-omi of uiirerenca. Tes," said the bride of three short months. "I had made up my mind to remain in the spinster class, then John appeared upon the scene and I ac cepted him because he was so unlik other men." "Oh, of course he's different," re joined the envious lady friend. "He proposed." Yonkers Statesman. Your Hair Contrary? Is it inclined to run away? Don't punish it with a cruel brush and comb! Feed it, nour ish it, save it with Ayer's Hair Vigor, new improved formula. Then your hair will remain at home, on your head, where it belongs. An elegant dressing. Keeps the scalp healthy. Does not chmnet the color of the hair. A rormola with aaaa kottla Show it t year teeter him about It, than do aa ha Hn yers Ve certainly believe this, or we would not say so. Ayer's Hair Vigor, as now made from our new improved formula, is a great preparation for the hair and scalp. Stops falling hair. Cures dan druff. Promotes the growth of hair. X C. Ay mr Oo., Lowoll, Km. mis Does one Fish live in this build ing?" Janitor Yes, third floor, but his name's Herring. "I am looking for a husband." "How would I do?" "But you are married?" "All husbands are." Houston Post. First Newporter Was It an inform al dinner? Second Newporter Very. The flowers only cost $2,500. Puck. "Since Maud's engagement how bright and happy she looks." "Yes; a match lights up a girl's face." Life. Mrs. Cheatham I believe I shall have to give up bridge. Miss Frank Really? Wasn't the game worth the scandal? Puck. "Nature plans well for mankind's needs." . "I should say so. What could be more convenient than ears to hook "spectacles over?" Old Lady (in a shoe shop) Have you felt slippers? Small Boy Assist ant (solemnly) Yes, ma'am; many a time! Comic Cuts. "Was it your wife who called you up this morning?" "No; that was aunt. It was my wife who called me down." Baltimore American. Solemn Man Do you hear the clock slowly ticking? Llon't you know what day It Is ever bringing nearer? Cheer ful Man Yes, pay-day. Professor I've come to see your col lection of curios. Merchant Pardon, If I introduce, first of all, my wife and daughter. Megendorfer Blaetter. "Opportunity calls just as often as in years gone by." "But with us, all huddled up in flats, opportunity is liable to whistle up the wrong tube." Minister And the child's name, madam? Mother 1( firmly) Name him Frederick Robert Cook Peary Smith. I'm not going to take any chances. Puck. Barber fto customer, whum he's cut up) Would you mind going out the back way? So many people might see yon In the main street. Meggendorfer Blatter. Suitor (on bended knee) See, In me, my Ipve, your most humble and devoted servant. She If this is your first place, I'll engage you for life. Lustige Blatter. Arctic Explorer During our whole two years in the polar region we couldn't wash ourselves once. Enfant Terrible Mamma, can't we move there? Lustige Welt. "Will that young man ever gc home?" demanded the irritated head of the house. "I guess so, father," re plied the mater famlllas. "He always has." Washington Herald. Professor's Wife (to cook) My hus band has received a call to Heidelberg Will you go with us? Cook I feel highly honored, madam, but I cannol accept the call. Lustige Welt. Poet When I finished that poem J was completely exhausted. Editor can sympathize with you. old man I was in the same condition when 1 finished reading it. Philadelphia Rec ord. He ( nervously ) Er erMa rgaret er er there s something na3 Deen trembling on my lips for the last two months. She Yes, so I see. Why don't you shave it off? Princeton Tiger. You women never keep posted on current events." "Wrhy, yes we do. I've been reading all about the finding of the pole. But, John?" "Well. what?" "How did the pole happen to be lost?" Public Ledger. "Say, Casey, it's har-red wurrker ye are. How many nous uv moriar nev ye carried up that ladder to-day?" Casey Hush, man. I'm fooling the boss. I've carried the same hod up and down all day, and he thinks I'm wurkln." Senior Partner Keep a sharp eye on Holdfast. I'm afraid he's robbing the firm. Junior Partner Eh? Is he living extravagantly? - Senior Partner Well, I passed him In the street yes terday, and he was smoking a cigar that didnf smell at all bad. Tit-Bits. "I must warn you, dearest," he said, "that after we are married you will very likely find me Inclined to be ar bitrary and dictatorial in my man ner." "No matter," she replied, cheer fully, "I won't pay the slightest at tention to what you say." Presbyte rian Standard. "Has that feller Pinkley returned home yet?" "Nope. He's been gone two years now, and nobody knows a blessed thing about him." "Well, derned if I shouldn't think you'd be afraid he'd come home some day and claim he found the South Pole." Cleveland Plain Dealer. One of the wittiest of Parisians. In a friend's box at the opera, was listen lng to "Thais." or rather trying to do so, for his hostess talked incessantly and deadened the music with her shrill voice. At, the end of the opera she invited him to the next subscribers' night. . "With pleasure," replied he; "I have never heard you In 'Faust.! Exchange. "How Is this?" asks the brutal hus band, looking over his wife's accounts. "Here's a bill for $40 for two switch es. I thought I heard you and Mrs. Magoogln talking about how glad you were that the new fashions had done away with rats and pompadours." "So they have," explains the fond wife. "But don't you see, the switches take the place of the rats and pompadours." Chicago PosC j vVVIMfcSW?vla' FREE I HARP - A new and wonderful mo meal (nutriment, which is a combination of th irrand Italian harp and guitar. It ha a beautiful tone and in ponilivKly the eaiKt Instrument to play ever made. We teach you at your own home. Aa an advertisement we are GOING TO GIVE AWAY one of our 112. fjO Harp Guitar tn each of the firnt ten persons in each county who rend ua their name, addrena and whom the nam m far. Sit down KIGH'f NOW and drop ua a card and be one of the lucky few, aa they are going fast. HARP-GUITAR MfG. CO.. 428 Lumber Exchange Building, Portland. Or. Chance for Bar grain. Dejected Youth I would like to re turn this engagement ring I purchased here a few days ago. ,, Jeweler Dldn'J f it isult. the young; lady? Dejected Touth Yes, but .another young man 'had already iciveh her one Just like It, and y ypultf jlike to ex change it for a wedding present. Tld- Blts. '" Tree Brought Ilala. In lower Egypt rain fellvvery sel dom. During the French -occupation, about 1789, it did not ralnfor sixteen months, but since Mahomet All and Ibrahim Pasha completed their vast plantations the former alone planted more than 20,000,000 olive, fir, cotton, acacia, plane trees, etc. there now falls a good deal of rain. To-Day and To-Morroir. Happy men are full of the present, 'or its bounty suffices them: and wisa men also, for its duties engage th&m. Our grand business undoubtedly is not to see what lies dimly at a dis tance, but to do what lies clearly at hand. Edward FltzGerald, "Polonius." Bad BLOOD "Before I began using Cascarets I had a bad complexion, pimples on my face, and my food was not digested as it should have been. Now I am entirely well, and the pimples have all disappeared from my face. I can truthfully say that Cascarets are just as advertised; I have taken only two boxes of them." Clarence R. Griffin, Sheridan, Ind. Pleasant, Palatable, Potent. Taste Good. Do Good. Never Sicken, Weaken or Gripe. 10c, 25c, 50c. Never sold in bulk. The gen uine tablet stamped C C C. Guaranteed to cure or your money back. MORPHINIf Before you pj a cent, we) will con fine too that Vavnin perniauipiitlr cures diui habit. Outran texl Dot to contain Murphioe, Laudanum, Opium or any otfatr habit form i nf dnif. No money required in ad vane, s full month t treatment lent to those afflicted without one etot of depot it. Manine haa cured thousands, ft will cure you. it It ft trea trial. You are to be too sole judge. Addreaa Man In Mad to In C. 3249 Umrnt It., $l. Lean, Me. CURE Iftt UST limit TOR (UU$tfiDS is as safe as it is effective. Guar anteed to contain no opiates. It is very palatable too children like it. All Druggists. 25 Cents On Rainy Days A Fish Brand Slicker will keep you dry And give yon fall vain ia comfort and long wear sa.oo GUARANTEED WATERPROOF Bold by firat-clait Beiailera the oonn try . 0Tr. Send for our Freo Catalogs A. J. TOWER CO. ,0,WEJ?3' Bo.ton.S.A. QrLtWjl TOWER CASiDUS CO.. Lid. 1"r'" Toronto, Canada 'ZSfBRAJ From Arctic A DOSE OF 1 1 II Solid brass font holds 4 quarts of oil sufficient to give out a glowing heat for 9 hours solid brass wick carriers damper top cool handle oil indicator. Heater beautifully finished in nickel or Japan in a variety of sty Its. Every Dealer Everywhere. If Not At Yours. Write for Descriptive Circular to the Nearest Agency oi tite STANDARD OIL COMPANY (Incorporated) GUITAR! FREE! Aa Sometime Ilnppena. "You'd like to have me give this a notice, I presume," said the literary editor. "Indeed, I would," answered the au thor of the book; "the best In the world." But the conscientious literary editor, after reading it, classified it as one of the worst in the world. So Like m Ulan. "George, did you go and order tha parlor lamp I told you I wanted?" "No, Laura; I clean forgot it." "Why, I asked you to tie a strin around your finKer to remind you of It. and you said you would." "I know I did, but In the abstraction of the moment I tied it around my pocketbook." injnrjr Done iy Moaqnltoea. Before the draining and diking of England and Holland, mosquitoes, ma laria, chills and fever were as bad as in our Southern States to-day. Un diked and undralned, neither of thesa countries had risen to its place In his tory, but had been balked by malarial degeneration. HOWARD E. BURTON - Awwyer and ChemuA. Leadville. Colorado. Specimen prices: Gold. Silver. Lead. SI. U..ld, Silver. 75c; Gold oOc: 7. mm or Oopper. SI. Midline envelopes and full price lint sent on application. Control and FmDlre workao- ; liuited. Reference: Carbonate National Bank. . C0FFEEC TEA SPICES BAKING POWDER EXTRACTS JUST RIGHT CLOSSET&DEYERS PORTLAND, ORE. GOIIORRHOEAandGLEET AT DRUGGISTS.OR TRIAL BOX BY MAIL 50c FROM PLANTEN.93 HENRY ST.BH00KLYK.rOl . BEWARE OF IMITATIONS. Painless Dentistry and briJKftwrfc n laned in one day ! & We will gnt you a rood Js22k gold or porciiii" j crown for $3.59 ) Molar Crownt 5.00 V7 2kBridsTath 3.50 h Gold Fillingt 1.C0 .- &f Enamel Filling! 1.00 CI Silver Filling! .50 4T-k Inlay Filling! 2. 50 vkJ$ 5.00 Ba.w:.WIlt1r1KUa ""J" ti mn tsruimn m Mmid rainless txlr (km i9U WORK GUARANTEED FOR 18 YEARS . Pain I mi Extraction roe when plate or bridge wars ii ordered. Coneultatlon Free. a ennnot set bet tea painleafl an teed. work done anywhere. All work fully rim r- Modern plwtrio eaulpniunt. Heet methods. Wise Dental Co. NCORPORATCto Thxbd eWiPB. 6ts. PORTLAND,WKtwn 0mc B0CCB: A. M. U t. M. lundT. to U P N U No. l-'lO WHEN writing to adTertlaer plea mention this papers A flaTorini? used the same as lemon or TanCTla, By dissolving granulated sugar in water ana addinir MaDleine. a delicious syrop is made and a syrup better than maple. Mapleineis sold by grocers. If not send 35c for 2 oi. bottle and recipe book. Creecent Mfg. Co., Seattle, Wav to Tropics w a i - T "THE OLD RELIABLE" 1 Si! x in Ten Minutes No oil heater has a higher efficien cy or greater heating power than the PERFECTION Oil Heater (Equipped with Smokeless Device) With it you can go from the cold of the Arctic to the warmth of the Tropics in 10 minutes. The new Automatic Smokeless Device prevents smoking. Removed in an instant for cleaning. the death notices.