Heppner gazette. (Heppner, Morrow County, Or.) 1892-1912, March 01, 1906, Image 7

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Heppner gazette., March 01, 1906, Image 7

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Newspaper Page TextAmending: It ou Rot a typewritten copy of this peech in advance, didn't you?" asked the reporter of the parly orRun. "Yea," replied the reporter of the oppo sition paper, "the Hpenker sent it in, even to the 'cheers' and 'applause' in parenthe ses." . "Well, then what are you taking down now?" "The 'cheers' and 'applause' and substi tuting 'sneers' uud 'groans.' " In France, out of every 1,000 inhabit ants, VSJ tire old people-of more than sixty years, as against 73 in England and 70 in Cerinany. 1 Annoyed. "Wore you annoyed while on the wit ness stand?" "Slightly," answered tlio great cor poration magnate. "The Judge and one or two other people in the courtroom seemed to think they were quite as im portant as myself." Washington Star. The Scientific Way." "Yes, he calls himself a scientific farmer." "And what does the science consist In?" "Why, he stays in town and runs the farm by telephone." Cleveland I'lain Dealer. A COLLEGE GIRL'S SUNDAY. H wmm MBA k.d WT9 Impure or effete matters accumulated in the blood during the winter cause in the spring such disfiguring and painful troubles as boils, pimples, and other eruptions, also weakness, loss of appetite and that tired feeling. The best medicine to take to rid yourself of them is Hood's Sarsaparilla, which thoroughly cleanses the blood, and effects permanent cures by giving healthy functional activity to the stomach, liver, kidneys, bowels and skin. This is the testimony of tens of thousands who have taken this great spring medicine. Accept no substitute for Hood's Sarsaparilla, but in 6ist on having Hood's and get it today. Sold by druggists everywhere. Usual form, liquid, or in new form, tablets, 100 Doses One Dollar." A Doctors i Medicine Ayer's Cherry Pectoral is not a simple cough syrup. It is a strong medicine, a doctor's medicine. It cures hard cases, severe and desperate cases, chronic cases of asthma, pleu risy, bronchitis, consumption. Ask your doctor about this. " I have nsed s (treat deal of Ayer's Cherry Pectoral for coughs and hard colli on the clmat. It has ahvayn done me great Rood. It in certain! a most wonderful coueli medi cine." MICH AUl. J. FlTZUBRALD, Medford, N.J. Alio manufacturers of yers SARSAPARILLA. PILLS. HAIR VIGOR. You will hasten recovery by tak ing one of Ayer's Pills at bedtime. Dr. Laurence I. Flick, an expert on tuberculosis, is planning an international convention, to b held in Washington in 1908. (Jwili, the Welsh bard, has just fin iBiitru iu n in aiisiaci:on a sermon on which he has been engaged for fifteen years. . More (Converts Every Year Every day in every year that comes, more housewives are giving up their exhorbitant priced Baking Powders and turning to K C, the honest and reliable, which has stood so well the test of years. They are find ing out that BAKING POWDER A Joke (hat Failed Twice. Miss Adelbert had just returned from a vacation spent at a tiny village on the Maine coast. In recounting her experiences she talked somewhat for the benefit of a cousin, a quiet person, who was visiting her city relatives for the first time In many years. "There was Just one store in the place," said Miss Adelbert, "and they kept everything, that Is, everything tbey had to keep. "One day I went In to buy Borne soap, and Just on a venture I asked the clerk if they had Browning, lie stared at at a second, then went off and looked under the counters and on the shelves. "Presently he came back and said, 'No, miss, we ain't got none. We got blacking, an' we got bluing, an we got whiting, but we ain't got a bit o' browning in the store.' " Miss Adelbert had to make several protests to assure her audience that this really happened. Finally the cous in asked, gravejy, "But, Cousin Bert why didn't you say varnish in the first place V" costs one-third the price of powder anywhere near K C quality, and makes better, purer, more healtmul baking. 25 ounces for 25c. Snd postal for " Book of Presents.' JAQUES MFG. CO. Chicago, 111. OH. W. A. Wist 18 YEARS HERE An.l iln' nil rii'ntn'.wnrk a'l the time that 1 tin- r r 1 of iir S A. Wisp, Iiiimri-s-t;i! ishniem arc expert ilentiNta who urn cniiipi'ient to pt-rlorin Dm mo-t inior;nt il"ii:ul opeiai ions. No ma:ter th' nature of tin- w rk, then; Is a mim re lo do It. WISE BROS., DENTISTS Pit. H. A. sTfUIiKVANT, Specialist on l h.lilren's Twill ami Ili'KUlaiing. Iu'lin Hlili;., Th'nl mill WHxhintrion St, h a. in. io n : in. rtu inl.iy.t V in 1J. M t. 2-rjj Work Donf on Weekly and Moithiv Paymtnts DR. T. P. wise. There is more Catarrh In this section of the country than all other difp&ses put together, aud until the last few years was supposed tube Incurable. Fit a great 1111117 yearsdoetori" pro-iiouiiUL-d it a local uiseae, and iireseribed loeal remedies, and by constantly failing to euro with local treatment, pronounced It incurable. Science bas proven catarrh to lie a coiiFtilu tional disease, and therefore requires coiieiitu tional treatment. Hall's Catarrh Cure, manu factured by K. I. Cheney A Co., Toledo, Ohio, In the only constitutional cure on the market. Jt Is taken internally in loes from lOdropstoa teaspoonful. It ai ls directly on the blond ana muc his surfaces of the f ygtetn. Thev offer one hundred dollars for anv rase it fails to cure Bend for circulars and testimonials. Address, K. J. ( HKMii' & CO., Toledo, O Bold by lruir(rist, 7'c. Hall s Family rills are the best. Amending the Declaration. "From a hasty examination," said the doctor, "I am decidedly of the opinion that you are suffering from the peculiar trouble known as 'clergy man's sore throat. " "The you say!" exclaimed the caller. "It is quite possible, however, that I may lie wrong. I will make another examination." Rppiwnt Iho survival of th flttt. We have beiimieilie larjret seed htuihe In the world wiyiiiM our hh--I nriMieiier Ihun oihem. ln you wish lo row the miwt beHiitlftil tlowerrt mid the llnost vev,'o- lalilee T J i. m I the Inststviln terry s. 100(1 Seed Annual free to all applicuuui. m. rrppy a co.. Dotrolt, Mich. &)&4l wwriTWBfli iT-itftriilft CLASSIFIEDADVERTISIMG Portland Trade Directory Well Drilling Machinery, Drilling: & I ishing Tools, Irrigation Plant. Hydrau lic Kdnis. Sprdy Tums. Write Cs reier:(w kachinery co. isl t-c, Morrison Ft. rortlitnd (ncKon A l.t'A It A VIT.KII CTI1K I'OK PILKS. Itchinc. Ill ml. lUei illnc, l'roiniflliiB l'ile. Drntr pists an' inithonzi'il to ret'imd limmy if PAO OI:.TjU-;N 1 fa Is to cure in 5 lo 14 Uuys. Jo. Names and Addresses in Portland of Repre sentative Business Firms. 1'IIOTO SI'I'l'I.IKs: Koilak ileveli.plmriimt prlnt init; write lur ri eH. W iMiitanl, t 'lm ke A Co. SlAlill' 1.AN1 KltNS Welsler Co., lowest prices on l,:mierns and Slides Portland. ELASTIC Kit; free HO-1 Kll V ; Supporters, llrnces; K oil to iiieHsiirenieut blanks: VoMlard, I'li.re. IIOItsKSnf all kinds for salo at very remonalile prices, liiipiire 7j frviiu St. Tltfssl-'s sent on approval: we cimrunb'P at In most dillieillt cines; iHMlard, t'ha-ke A I'o. Stt'KKT PKAS-Send n,-r,irprkc asMrl Knlriiold Meilai puis. J.J. Iluter. ss l-roni mreet. AKTIFKTAI. HVKS; every shade ami shape: ns tMirtmeat sent on approval; V onWard, t'.urke l o CKKAM SKPAItATitsWe tiuaranlef the t'. s. Separator lo lie Hie best. Write lor ire call ur. Ilazeiwood Co., Ullli ami ( ink. If KN'S CLOTH TNH Iluffiim Pendleton, sole aci'iiis Alfred HenlHm.n nrni'i rlotiie l-.very-iliitu; In men's turn rhinkK. lurnsou and s.xtli airteis. opiMAtte oaiiuliee. FltKK I.AM IN OHKOON U'oler the Cnrey Irri- f ilion ' l. Iwil d r-el Iroii sta'.e. Write today. UKiklet and map !!-. It. s. Cookv A; 1 o., -yl Allr stnn-t, I'ortlaod. oreiton. WANTED A brijriit man with team in yonrcoun ty. Stt'aily work anJood wages to rijjht man. liefereiices required. For par ticulars address KOCH V. T. CO. Box X Winona, Minn. The Genuine T0WER3 J VI At AlUb SLICKER HA3 BEEN ADVERTISED AND SOLD FOR A QUACItR OF A CENIUJY. LIKE ALL It 15 made of the btst rateral. m bl&ck or yellow, fully e-uwanteed. and sold by reliable dceler everywhere. STICK TO THE SIGN OF THE FISH. The Way of It. Tlie Misus Mary Ann, please ex plain to nie Low It Is that I saw you kissing a young man in tLe kitchen last nigtit. The Maid Sure, I dunno how it is, ma'am, unless yen were Iookin' through the keyhole. Cleveland Leader. She Doilifm Church anil Devotes Her Time to Odd John. "The church of the future is to ho wonianless as well as nianless, Judg- from the women's colleges," said the denn of a woman's college, accord ing to the New York Press, "for it is only by the strictest discipline that we can induce the girls to attend church. They Lave all sorts of ex- cuses why they should not attend dl vine worship and it's wonderful how many headaches develop Sunday morn in,'. Almost every woman's college demands a church record from every student and it is only by keeping thorn under our thumbs iu this way that we can be sure of their ever hearing a ser mon during their college course. The college maiden's disinclination to fhurch worship is not due to an irre ligious spirit, but it's because she wants the day absolutely to herself to rest, to dream, to write letters home, to do the thousand and one things for which there is little time on recita tion days. "Many girls look forward to Sunday as the day when they may indulge in the luxury of late rising. They won't get up until 9 or 0:30, and then they get a chafing dish breakfast in their rooms. They say it rests them per fectly and puts them in the proper con dition for the rush and grind which be gins the next day. There are rumor that some of the students take Sunday as a mending day and, of course, such a practice would be stopped at once if w only had actual proofs of it: but such proofs are difficult to get. Some time it looks suspicious if a skirt binding which has been ripped all the week appear nicely sewed on Monday morning, but there is no reason why the rewlng might not have been done Saturday afternoon or evening. "Punday the girls like to forget that they are In college and become merely the eternal feminine. They lay in a stotk of good things on Saturday and invite two or three friends in to take supper with them Sunday evening. They wash out their handkerchiefs and stocks and clean their gloves. They pet spots out of their skirts and straighten out their bureau drawers. They rearrange the furniture In their rooms so that it will look less monoto nous. They go to call on some of the 'town people.' They revel In a kimono In the morning, because, they say, they are obliged to 'get into togs' every oth er day in the week. They read popu lar fiction of the day and discuss the marriage question. "Sometimes they take long walks, but these walks are always attended by Sunday decorum and there is never any junketing Sunday. They seem to appreciate more the beauties of na ture on that day and think less about autumn leaves making a 'gorgeous decoration for the sophomore dance.' or about the 'perfectly grand fried chicken and cream potatoes' that are served at some of the weather-beaten old farm houses. "Sunday the college girl gives' her domestic instincts free rein, but she won't go to church if she can possibly help It" HAD CATARRH THIRTY YEARS Congressman Mcckison Gives Praise to Pe-ru-na for His Recovery. CONGRESSMAN MEEKISON PRAISES PE-RU-NA Hon. David Meekisoa, Napoleon, Ohio, ex-member of cosgreEB, Fifty-fitb district, writes: v i "I have used several bottles of Peruna and I feel greatly benefitted thereby' from my catarrh of the head. I feel encouraged to believe that if I use it a short I time longer I will be fully able to eradicate the disease of thirty years' standing." I j DAVID MEEKISON. ANOTPER SENSATIONAL CURE: Mr. Jacob L. Davis, Galena, Sione county, Mo., writes: "I have been in bad health for thirty-teven years, and after tak ing twelve bottles of your Peruna I am cured." Jacob L. D.ivis. If you do not derive prompt and satisfactory results from the use of Peruna, wri e at once to Dr. Hartman, giving a full statement of your care and he will be pleased to give you his valuable advice gratis. Address Dr. Hartman, President of The Haitman Sanitarium, Columbus, O. A CONSERVATIVE GIVER. lit til? tm X IT0WFB CANAMAN CO. t.lt , ioionio. can. A J TOWJB CO. 01tOM.riAS U 14 Mothers will find Mf, Wlmlow'g Boothlng Pyrup the best remedy touse for their children during the teething rriod. So, -There! "Ila! You refuse me, then, proud beauty? Well, I know your reasons? Were I rich you would bo but too glad to accept me." "Mayhap, it Is even so, Rupert Fitz goobler. Hut by my troth you would Lave to be a whole lot richer than cnybody else In the world, I'll tell you that." Cleveland Leader. FITS IWI.TR V V(MH If jr.m want your hen to lr inor f-Ki" writn im tor fr.- rartlciilara ttiit llr lil.NA rol'MHY i KMi Ai-mn Mills Co.. l'on:ol, Uri'Kon. TAIIXKH f'olnnitiin Wn.ln Mill '.. Portland. Or. I.aipt Htylr rlntli- itiAl t nifAMirertic up. mrieil it!-aAun'ni'nt aytfni tnfttirvs ritt-t tit. Write for fri aaiiipUiiiiil prion. riAXOS CltlANSll,t. rtann hnnw on Pa cific maT. 1 irican ami Piano on wr paymf-m. I w rile .r lii'i uint yun a rne. Allen A (llbert-Kamakfr '., Portland, oren. Orciron llrtH Snertflc tb!I Kidney and ltladW tr"iin:e. urv II A k A II K. fr.c-mr. I rial ire Kent liy mall lur IDc Id clamps. Send today. 3MI. Third St. Xinman ItairtJorvIt Swltrhe. Pompadour, Men' 1 oupe. and it: fcet 4iia!!iy : kmeM pr:re; end f tnfe price lI: mail ord-r pe-iaUr. i'aria liair Mure, ua Washington L IBM. Dr. C. Gee Wo WONDERFUL NOME TREATMENT Th w n.l rfiil rhl fese l.-:or I ra'l'd pr-Hl Im-nine lie c ir, leil without cie.-a-lion iliitl are e'.ven op to llle. He rure wtlh feij lh..e wondi rrnl t ill- faJjA l-ai k and veteliil,:. EtiL.'-v- Jr.. thMt are entlrt-.v 11 .! J' ri i'Vli known in ni-l ral m-:- 4t lTiu D Jjt J'.'J em-e in in c 'it itre. i nro ihe oi tiioat h.irmlrs r'iii.di till lam.iu do.'ior kimv theartiou of over &HI d.f e-.-m r.Mnedlp w lil.-h h aiii-ei'ully use In .l.rT. r.ni Omeaw. II niHrnni.e.l.x iireoj-arrli. aMIima. hinir, ihr -a', tli. ninailHiii, iicrvoiisn., nuiinai h, ller: k.d n , etc.; ha. huidr-d if trallnionlal. harre moderate. ail and ee lilm. I all. nl nit of the t it jr w rite for hlnnkr and rcular. h nd ttaiiip. CuNstl-TATIoN r liKI. .ddrtss TKE C. GEE WO CHINESE MEDICINE CO 162' a Tint St.. S. t. Cor. Morrison fj ki I! ro t ii Mention pcr. POriA!SD. OREGON. P. N.U. No. 9-06 ITTUElf writlnc to art re rtlaera IT uontloB tb la paper. rermnnpntly rnrod. T'o fllsor nerrousnes after lirst clav'Mieof lr. K 1 1 lie' i; rent N.rve iiesiorer. fer.ii ,.r I ree.'i trial hoitle and treatise. Ur.K. II. Kline, Ltd.,S3l Arch St.. Philadelphia, l'a. l.aty l'hlloaophy. Mrs. Ascuni Doesn't that lazy hus band of yours work for you at all? Mrs. J ark son 'Deed, ma'am, he say he ain't cwine tor, kase he's a-tryln' to lib tip to the bible teachin'. Mrs. Ascuni What bible teachin:;? Mrs. Jacksiui He say do bible done toll us dat "Contentment am bett.ih dan preat riches." so ho des nacber'ly 1huiii1 ter le contented. riiilndolphia 1'ress. TO t t ltK A Col li IX (INK PAY Take I .A X ATI VK niMMiHJiiliilneTnWets. Prne ;it r. fuml money II It fat x to -nri. E. W. ..lUtVI. siKiiulure Is on each ho. Site. Strnj- fow'i Art. A stray cow, picked up by the po lice on the South side, nearly put the ollicer out of business and creates! bts of fun for the urchins In the ne!rrh borhood. The row was raptured by the newly appointed subpoliceman. and, wishing to distinguish himself by an arrest, he determined to take the bovine to the station house. Pro curing a rope, he fastened it to her horns and started down Cottage Grove avenue. The thoroughfare was slip pery from a rainstorm. nud in a Iffy the lolicemnn was sliding down the asphalt on bis stomach, with the row on a dead run. The olllcer was g.-ime j and hung on to his captive for a j square, when the boys headed the ani mal oft". He landed his prisoner ami then begged off for the night to clean up. Chicago Inter Ocean- Squire Flanders was detailing the characteristics of the late Amos How den, one of his follow townsmen, to Mr. Partridge, a new comer in Scy- niouth. "As a loading citizen, we rather ex looted Amos 'd do something handsome for the town," said the 'squire: "re member it to the tune of a few thou sand for a libr'y, or something." "And he didn't?" asked Mr. Par tridge, with easy interest. "Ho didn't," repeated Squire Flan dors, dryly, "lie didn't make any pub lic bequests at least, not any out-and-out ones. Some years ago his wife per suaded him to put a fountain in the squaro, In front of the iostotllce, nnd the agreement was that he was to keep it in repair, the town to reimburse hiin for half the expense. m "You don't know what our winters are, but you will by spring." the squire continued, prophetically, "so you'll have to take my word for it that that fountain cost the town pret' near 's much 's the schools. Kverv year, regu lar, the pipes had to be dug up, and new pieces put In where they'd froze up and bust, nnd after a while we owed Amos quite a little sum. In his will he canceled that obligation, and that was the extent of his renieniUT lug the village be was lorn and brought up In an.l him close to th millionaire line." Mr. Partridge smiled. "He wasn't what could be calks! a royal giver." ho commented. "Royal I" gasis d the squire. "You couldn't have led him blindfolded up to the word. I'll tell you how 1M Vesey sized Amos tip." he continued witn nappy roeoiioetion. --ir aidos was an ostrich,' I'd s.-tld. 'and was 'goin' to lay an egg. he'd sure lav a jKAvee's egg. An" he'd rail It,' says Kd 'keeping on the safe side."" Chinese Glrla Star at Home. Chinese girls as a rule are not sent to school ; the mother superintends j their training In housework. As soon as the girls are old enough they are i taught to cook, sew, make and mend ! clothes and Indeed do all domestic work. But the enlightened Chinese sends his daughter to school when near a mission or some other school. Aa They Danced. Twas nt a hop that he proposed; His heart went thump-ty-thump. But that same heart was true, and she. Accepted at a jump. Plenty of Time. They were discussing the canal. "I don't think, said one, "that P.ige low stayed down there long enough t learn anything about conditions." "Oh, I dunno,' said another; can pet eonsideralde bit up by less 'en twenty-four hours." a man fleas in Imagination. Sandy Gritty George went up da road an' told all de ladles in de way side cottages dat I once had a castle tn France an' an automobile. ' Dusty Gee '. Vid such a press agent as dat yer ought to git on de stage. ,...xk'-h-K'':"X:.-X'-''':'-:':' HE ATTENDS TO BUSINESS who goes straight to work to cure Hurts, Sprains, Braises by ths use of St.J aco End saves time, money and gets out of misery quickly. It Acts Like Magic. Price, 25c. and 50c. V V T T V Y r r y v v y hs Oil The Little Doctor in your Vest Pocket 3 Teacher Johnny, for what Is Switz erland famous? Scholar Why nf in Swiss cheese. Teacher Oh. something grander, more Impressive, more tremendous. Scholar I.hnburger? t'levrhiTid I lender. Open to n lotion. "IV you Kdiove in reiii.-ani iti.in :" n;ded Smith. "I don't know," answered the man who weighs his opinion;. "I hive never seen It tried." Washington Star. EE the thin, round-cornered little Enamel Box below I When carried in your vest pocket it means Health-Insurance. It contains Six Candy Tablets cf pleasant taste, almost as pleasant as chocc'ate. Each tablet is a working dose of Cas carets, which acts like Exercise on the Bowels and Liver. It will not F'Jrge, sicken, nor upset the stomach. Because it is not a " Bile- driver," like Sails, So dium, Calomel, Jalap, Senna, ncr Aperient Vaters. These waste Diges tive Juices cf the system needed to morrow, in merely flushing out ths Bow els today. Neither Is it like Caster Cil, Glycerine, cr Cher C:ly Laxa tives that simply lutr-eats the Ir.tes t.r.es fcr transit cf the food stepped up ia them at that pirc ular t.rr.e. These emergency drugs relieve the Immediate trouble, tut do net relieve Ps Cause. " The same trouble will therefore recur again till that Cause is removed permanently. The chief cr:? cf Cor.st:pa!:rn ar.d digestion is a weakness cf the Muscles that contract the Intestines nd B:el;. Carearets are practically to the F:?l Muscles what a Massage and Cold E-;a are io the Athletic Muscles, They stimulate the Bowel Muscles to contract, expand, and squeeze the Diges tive Juices out cf food eaten. Cascarets do .'this naturally, without purging cr discomfort. They dsn'j help the Bowels and Liver in such a way as to make them lean up?r similar assistance fcr the future. This is why, with Cascare'.s, the dos may be lessened each succeeding time instead cf increased, as it must be with all succeeding doses cf ether Cathartics and Laxauves. Cascarets acj 1 ik a exercise. If carried in your Vest Focket, (cr car ried in My Lady's Purse), and eaten just when you s; f ect you need cr.e. you wilrr.ever know a sick cay from ths S&ea'ic s:.e cf" lst fWJkti" Cjsciret T.-r r.v:.:-; to WcU h. ills cf life. Fecause.r.ea:!ya!l these z be-In in the Bowels, and p.trtil Ccnstiraticn all ether Diseases. "Vest Focket" box paves t.-.s fcr 13 cents. cn.y and r. sure y th you get the fie genutre. Remedy C ver s:.J in tu.fc. Ev Sterling rrads pa::v. ery ullct tf-FREE TO OUR FRIENDJt We wart to sr?3 t c-.r --1 a tn:;r..i tt-A-iti(rl btlLD-rt.lfc B0.NEUM t v kari-enam'iej Is uk-ts. It is a N-sc.y for v' crt-Siin tjil.c Ten i certs in rtjnrjs is asked ai a eiMsarvf pvJ toe. .. r cct cl tAwcatr s W:t!lbici t.vsc,::.!v t:fc k?t -sloaO. : iertj tiMtjy. in'nticnii: t-.s rjpr A'4' SUrut KeceUjr Carney. CSioer .New Yk.