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About The Oregon scout. (Union, Union County, Or.) 188?-1918 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 2, 1886)
The Hack Writer. The hack writer in n country town is rather a pleasant fellow who wears dingy clothes ami whose shirt bosom is stained with the blubbering spray from a largo quid of tobacco. JIc has ex pressed so many opinions for other people that ho has none of Ii is own. lie docs nearly all tho writing for the local paper, but gets no credit and but little pay for it During the county political enmpaign, he wrilcB commu nications for both parties. Ask iv man who tho hack writer is and ho answers: "Oh. that's old Tom So-and-So. Sort of n literary man. Writes death verses and political editorials. Putty sharp feller, but ho don't amount to anything. Never had a dollar in his life." Some one meets tho hack writer and asks: "Tom, are you busy?" . "No; wny?" "Wanted you to do a little writing for mo." "All right." 4 Did you see tho last issue of tho IorscFly? Jim Dicklcson comes out and gives me lils. 1 want you to writ mo an article that will tear him all to pieces. Como uround to my oiliec." ,Si vcr.il days afterward, Jim Dickie son meets tho hack writer ami says: "Did you sue Lagson's como back at tho article yon wrote for mo?" "Yes, believe I did." "Well, 1 want you to burn him up. Come on around to my ollico. I'll pay you for it." Tho hack writer soon has about a col umn and a half of vituneration. "How do you like thai?" ho asks, when ho has read it to Dicklcson. "First rate. About how much do you think it is worth?" "1 don't know." "Set j'our price on it." "I don't like to prico another man's work." "Hut I don't know how much it is worth to you.". "Well, will scventy-iivo cents bo about right?" "Yes, I reckon so." "Hero's your money." Tho hack writer is always ready to represent any paper at n press conven tion, but ho never goes on press excur sions, When asked way ho cannot go, ho replies: "1 cannot sparo tho time." "Oh, you can spare thrco or four days. We'll have a lirst-class time, and will get cut rates at tho hotels." "1 don't mind tho expense, but I really cannot sparo the timo." .Just then a man rails the hack asido and says: "I liavo just received a eut ' ting letter, and I want you to answer it for me. Come on, dasli it oil', and then I'll set up tho drinks." Arkati $aw Traveler. A Midsummer-Day's Dream. All cummer long I liavc piled t lie law, I really think I must recruit. I dream I lieiir the occmi'h roar While In the courts 1 press my suit. The tullor duns urn for hit pcoro: I need new U'linls elothcti t'o bout, I'll boldly null; Into the store And liavo him press my lust year's Milt. Ah I then I'll seek Hint ocenii's chore, Deserting courts, both real und moot: I'll learn miother kind ot lore, As by her side I pro my Milt, (itvryc A'. Thnxtp, In Life. A Notablo Event. Tho biggest colored wedding over witnessed in Louisiana was that cele brated at Soulotiipio plantation, in Iber ville Parish, recently. Few while wed dings compare with it, Thoro was a special train from this city for tho in vited guests, a string bund imported especially for tho occasion and refresh ments by tho first restaurantour in Now Orleans. Uy day tho mansion of tho brido's father was a mass of natural flowers; by night tho grounds wore llghtod with lanterns and Japanoso lire. All tho cream of colored society graced tho occasion and not a few white per sons of standing were among tho guests. As for tho dresses, few ball-rooms have Been auy thing liner or tastier. Tho contracting parties wero Miss Kladio Allam, daughter of a member of tho Louisiana legislature, and Prof. Palmerston Lanihy, of Mansilold Col logo, another legislator. Tho brido'n father, originally a slave and coachman, bore in those days tho name of Soulou one. lie has not altogether forgotten that time, for his sugar plantation, onu of tho handsomest and prettiest in Lou isiana, Mill recalls tho old slave days in Its natno Soulouipio whereas ho him self is to-day Hon. Thoophilo Allaln. Every prominent negro politician in tho United States was invited to this event, ami nearly all sent presents or congrat ulatory telegrams. Charleston Courier. Shoai's or Pair of Shoars. Perhaps somo of our readers aro crit ical enough in tho uso of languago to decide whether tho customer or the clerk was right in tho following dia logue; (.'iistomor (to olork in hardwaro store) "Show mo a small, low-priood fchears." Clerk (facetiously) "Perhaps you moan a pair of shoars." Customer (sovcroly) I moan precise ly what I said." Clerk (dolluntly, opening a specimen nrt.cle)- "Aro thoro not two blade hero? and don't two mnko a pair?" Customer (triumphantly) "Von havo two logs. Doos that make you a pnlr of men?" Tho shoars wero dono up In profound slleuce. Tho Homestead. Some Summer Girls. Tho unlucky girl who is one of six or seven big sisters. Tho ciddy girl who wears short skirts, tight shoes and dotes on Sar: toga. Tho olophanUnc girl who bowls twico a dav in an incneotual oflort to reduce her weight. Tho engaged girl who, with an an ions air, is always expecting a telegram from "him." The envied Now' York girl, who lias more stylish dresses than anyone else in the house. J ho subdued girl with older sisters who wishes they would marry ofT am let her have a chance. Tho lively Atlantic City girl, whose cras:o is caramels, and who thinks tho sweetest thing in life is dancing on the pier. The sensible, modest girl who be haves herself and will bn married well when all tho roighning belles will have become old maids. The ingenious girl who, in tho nb senre of young men, flirts with the hotel clerk and bathing-master just to keep her hand in. Tho smart New England girl who coos botanizing and paralyzes the young men with long, Latin namos. Tho ilgly girl, with a blue-blood ped igree, at Mount Dcserl, to whom every nice young man lias to bo prcsontcd as soon as ho arrives. The stupendous girl, in a lilchoi green costume and a Rembrandt hat, who carries her chin in air on the front seat of a Newport drag. The eccentric girl who sits on the beach at Sea Girt alone, or wanders m tin; woods and doesn't seem to want-to know a soul in tho house. Tho shapely girl atNarragansctt Pier who looks best in her bathing suit and spends her afternoons in tiio water or lounging on tho sand. J no athletic girl who is camping in tho Adirondacks, who has cultivated her muscle by smashing the pestiferous insects that abound there. Tho inexperienced girl who is tickled by tho attentions of a played-out beau, and thinks the othor girls are jealous when they advise her to diseottrago them. The happy girl who went to Europo early in the season and slipped several nico Paris dresses through tho Custom house, in which she now flourishes su perbly. The flirtatious girl who goes boating with gallants without a. chapcrono at Lake George and has boon doing so for successive seasons without any appre ciable result. Tho desporate girl Hearing JiO, with an extra bottle of ltlooni of Youth and a trunk-load of juvonilo sashes, who feels that "now or never" is tho time to decide her fate. A sentimental girl who carries a yellow-covered novel to tiio breakfast ta ble at Capo May, and whoso stock of conversation is conlined to a rehash ol tho latost silly Action. Philadelphia Time. Going to a Wedding. . A young professor in an Illinois uni versity was engaged to bo married to the daughter of a wealthy farmer living in ono of tho estern counties of the s'alc. On tho day of tho wedding tho bridegroom was driven in a buggy through a country road in the direction of his prospective father-in-law's house. Not bniug familiar with tho neighbor hood lie stopped in front of a dilapidat ed log cabin and inquired of a lank man who was loaning against a rail fence: "Is this the way to Mr. Poddur'.-,?" The lank man hitched up his troup ers and said: "He you going to PotLier'?" "Yes." "That's where tho doin's is to-night. Ills dartor's going to bo hitched." "Yes." "Who is she goin' to git?" "A man named Tompkins," said tho blushing bridegroom. "Is ho any good?" "Pretty poor stick, 1'vo been told." "lias ho got any Myle?" "Not niuoh." "Woll," said tho old man, with a sigh of rolief, "Pin glad hu's such a poor shoat, for my gals has got an in vito to the weddin', an' 1 heard nobody could go that couldn't eat with thuir forks. My gals can't eat with their forks, but 1 reckon I'll lot 'uni go. Podder's Is two miles ahead." - Torre Haute Express. A Problem Solved. Mother "Carrie, if you don't study harder at school I'll have to tell your pa, Mr. Nieefollow says ho has to keep you in every aftornoon." Carrie "I tudy hard enough, but when it comix to recitation I always in I ii.s somehow -except when I forget." "Forget what?" "Forget to ims." "1 ronlly ea't muleratHudyoUiOhllii." "Woll, you see, we're wo'ro onjjajf ed now." Omaha World. Tonsorial Horn. An oldurly gentleman, on whose head only a few lonesome hairs llngvr otl, untiiruJ a drug store and said to the el oik: "I want to buy n hair brush.' "For your own usuF" "Yo." "What's tho mutter with a tooth bruali?M--3,cii Siftdtijs. DOMESTIC HINTS. STEWKD ETKAK. lake sonic slices of beef, popper and snlt them well, slice up a couple of onions thin and lav a 'piece or two of tho steak at the bottom of a clean sauce nn, then some ot l Ho onion anil on that more steak, and so on alternately till you have put all in; shake and turn it about frequently to keen it from burning; let it slow in its own gravy till the meat becomes tender; then lake nfl all tho fat from the top, mix sonic flour in two tablospoonfnls of water mil pour it gradually into the stow; stir woll and when it boils up. good rc move from the lire ami serve. sti:wj:i vi:ai.. Lay a Irmieklo ol veal in a saucepan witli two blades of mace, an onion, small whole pepper and some salt, with two quarts of water; cover it closo und let it simmor for two hours. iti:t:i' jutOTir. Take a leg of beef, cut it in pieces out it into :i gallon of water, skim it, iiit in two or three blades of mace, 5ome parsley and a crust of bread; boil t till tho beef is tender, toast bread and ;ut into dice, put it in a dish, lay in the oeef and pour on the broth. Cut the meat from the bones, and hainr minced it verv line witli u small piece of lemon peel, grate over it a lit tle nutmeg, sprinkle on somo popper and salt. Put the bones into a sauce nan with a lanre onion chopped lino and water enough to moisten well; thicken with a little flour and butter and serve on buttered toast. IIAKICOT MUTTON. Make a good grevy by boiling the trimmings, seasoning it with pepper and salt. Strain and add carrots, parsnips and onions previously boiled tender. Slice them in, then pepper and salt the mutton, broil it brown; put it into tho gravy along with tho vegetables, and stew all together ten minutes. ISOII.KU CAICItOTS. Scrape and wasli tliem, then split tlieni in two, if very largo, into four, and uut them across; they require long boil ing to make them soft. TAl'IOP.V l'l'DDING. Tako six tablospoonfnls of tapioca und soak it in milk for some hours be fore you ilend to use it; when you are going to make your pudding, put the tapioca into a quart of milk, place it on the lire, anil, as soon as it boils, sweet en it to your taslo and let it simmer for a quarter of an hour. Pour into a ba sin and stir in a little fresh butter and three egirs well beaten. Pake one half hour. I.KMO.V ITIMMNl!. Take the yolks of six eggs well beat en, with a quarter oi a pounii oi sugar; take a quarter of a pound of butter molted in as little water as possible; keep stirring it until cold; then mix all together witli tho juice of two lemons mil the grated peel. Cover the dish with a thin puiV paste, pour in the mixture, and bake for half an hour. CUI'.AM si. AW. Shave one half head of cabbage, tako three tablespoonfulls of thick, sweet ream, three tablespoonfuils of sugar, alt and pepper to taste, one-half pint of vinegar. Mix thoroughly. DOIJOIINUTS. One eup of sugar, ono cup of sweet milk, two tablespoufiils each of butter mil lard, throe eggs, throe teaspoon- fuls of baking powder, flour enough to roll well. Cut into bliapo and fry in boiling lard. SI'OMii: CAICK. One-half pound of sugar, three oggs one-quarter pound of flour, one tea spoon of baking powder, one-quarter cup of sweet milk, liako in slow oven. English, You Know. When n imm wears r .'ollar that's high, And ii round piece of jjlass on his eye, A coat lonjr as emits ro, And white jailors that cover ench boot, I'lll It looks like a Chinaman's loot, Why, It's KikIIIi jou know. (in Htmoit. She Did Not Wilt "Why, Ashley, old man. you look iU jocted. What,'s the matter with ou, old fel?" "To tell the truth, old chappie, I do feel rat lior rocky. Do you know, I've just had tho most painful experience of my life?" "Indeed, now yon don't ay so. dear boy. Well, I'm sorry for that. Come, now, how was it thou?"' "Whv, it was Miis Tuberose, vou know. I've been dead gone on her al most ever sdneo 1 llrst knew her, and this forenoon, do you know, 1 plucked up courago and proposed. 1 flatter myself 1 did it in stlo, too. Wo wero out walking on tho rocks together, and when wo camo to a lovely, secluded spot I dropped my lixudarohiof on the ground, knelt gracefully down upon it, and told her all my undying passion. 'Beauteous creature,' mid I with fer vor, 'yourovod aro bright s shining stars, and pioreo my very soul. Your uhot'k ie as tho wild blush-row, your brow as nhtUutor fair. My iovo for you shall nuvor die, but I onu and (dial! unless 1 havo your pity nd uu, lows. Oh, angol of my heart, wilt thou bo mine? That's what 1 said. Sort of blank verge, you see. KuUior i? neat proposal, too, 1 flutter iu)olt. Don't you think so?" "Porfoolly iiiinieii5. doar boy. Per fectly Iminpuito, Ami d d slut wilt? What did stto f" "Oh. that's the trouble Chestnut.' "--Somen'Wt ..n Suokakl W f&si Absolutely Pure. This powder never v,m. A mnrvrl ol purity, Mlrouth and wlmii soni'iifs. More eonomiial limn tho ord.unry Kinds, and rannot ho sold in cumin tition with the mult it iido ot low terit, Hlmrt weight nlnm or phosplnite powderx. Hold only in cans Koyai. 1Uki.no I'owiir.u Co., 3 00 Wall St., i. y. HENTENMAL HOTEL BAB, E. MILLER, Proprietor. Having fitted up tho Centennial Hotel Hur-roun, and removed my stock ol Wines, Liquors & Cigars to that place, I am better prepared than ever to entertain and regain my customers. I keep none but the best of EuHtcrn I.lciuoriH, Itlllivniilccc. Walla Wnlln, and Union Itcci. Also, till) Finest Brands of Cigars. COMMERCIAL nmmr ninl TJonfl iifuij ami roou oui Ofi'osin: Ckxti:sm.vi. Hotci. JOHN S. KI.lOTT, PJtOIMlIKTOR. irnvinc furnished this old and popular hostelry with ample room, plenty ot feed, good hostlers and new bujjjj'eH, is better prepared than ever to aeeommodate cus tomers. Jly terms are reasonable. B Adam Oiioshman, I'lioi'itinTon. Has now on hand and for Palo tho best ol HARNESS, LADIOO, urn: it and I.At'E LEATHER. SHEEP SKINS, ETC. in:rrniArvn ec:si:j:s Paid for Hides ami Pelts. HOT LAKE! Situated four miliM mst of Union depot on Houth side of the O. 1!. it N. Co. 'a rail road. ifAEI MURAL BATHS. In Comfoi t.ilile lloomw. Honltli for tho Sick, and Host for tho Weary. Especinllv nditi.led for the Relict of Wo men. Id muler the supir imoi ol ono H0 hut) had thirty yearn' epericm'e. S. 1'. NEW HARP, Proprietor, SMOKE OUR 4 P 95 Pest Havana Filled Five Cent Cioar. 5 Jones Pros., agents, Union. E. GOLLINSKY & CO. A Positive Cure. MEN. you ni, nini;le or mitiru d, LOST middle-. itfed and all w ho and niter old, with .lSAMI!Ma. Nervous Peltiln y. Spermatorrhea. Seminal l.oe-, SeMiul Pee.iy, Tallin' Memory Weak Eyes, stunted development, luek ol onergy, iinpoverinlil It.ood, pimpleH, 1111 pedimtmtd to mnriiaxe; nlnohlood iimUkin disease, Hypiuu, erupuoiiH, imir aiuin;, bone pniiiti, nwelliun, sore throat, ulcere, flectw of mercury, kidney ami bladder troublev, wenk buck, luiniiin.' urine, incon tinence, uouorrhu'H, gleet, stricture, receive earchiiiit treatment, prompt, relit)! ami cure for lift). Hotii Sk.mw coiitf'ilt confidentially. If in trouble, call or write. Delay are danger ous. t'll at once; SJ." y.ar experience. Terms Conll. Olliie lioms S :i. m. li 8 p. '.j. ' DR. VAN MOW, ISCAR, VA2 I U 1 1, ud t. p,,rt l.i ml, Orejom SPRING BLOSSOM BOILS, riJIPLES, IJLOTCIIKS And Eruptions of the Skin. Dys Pbpsia, Sick Headache, and all KIDNEY COMPLAINTS, brioO fc.Tlun lll,w ii. f-tli)VKp.la, liulUe lo j..l SkW Itmd.eli. m.!Im fuu ld Ii lg Tut 11 saiul4r it unrna.u u imt ii a rforiK." ii-m sua (ium runner, i ou rc a. llttfrt)' to ute nj ii Trice, 50cj Trial Siie, 10c. Sold tova.ll Drueeiata o TCHELL factory. Ram, wis. Bund, wuai, urepn Manufaeturors RARRIAfiFS. RIIGIIilPfi. PHAPTflNfi B0 dUUBD Gnu KcM 53a e ids' ESJ wl lira a iiSl Vti? J Buckboards, Road Carls, a 3i CANTON CLIPPER PLOWS, 11AUROWR. ETC. GALE CIltl.LKD PLOWS. AND IDI5AL PLED MILLS. SEND FOR CATALOGUE AND PRICE LIST. FREE. MITCHELL & LEWIS CO., Limited. 192-191 Front St., Portland, Oregon. Pianos WALLA WALLA, HOWLAND Munl.u ST Tvlain Street, 01 XJ" I Keep ooiHtaiitlyon hand a largo supply of Parlor anil Red Room Sots, Bid ding, Di'sks, Ollii'L' Furniture, i-tc. Upholstering Done in tie Best Style. Lounges, Mattresses, and all Kinds of Furniture inailo to order. Your patron age solicited. Doalers hi- yooenes, imogos mm uEgars. Variety and Fancy Goods, Watches, Clocks and Jewelry. Musical Instruments, Picture Frames, Bird Cages, Baby Carriages, Etc. Candies, Nuts and Fruits, Sclisol Books, Stationery, Periodicals, Novels, Etc., of Every description. Orders from all parts of tho country promptly attended to. PHOTOGRAPH All 'tis of Flioloppliic Wort New Scenery and Accessories Just Received. All Work Warranted VIEWS OF RESIDENCES $( L! IS CO, (LIMITED.) of and Dealers in B V.l Spring; Wagons, Etc. El gent. WASHINGTON TERRITORY. & WILSON', turers of ITUR Union, Oregon. 4 - GALLERY. Done in a superior manner. M -WW to Give batisiacuon. TAKEN ON APPLICATION. Organs
