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About Corvallis gazette. (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909 | View Entire Issue (July 30, 1901)
May not be all that la meant by dyspepsia
now, bat It will be If neglected.
The uneasiness after eating, fits of nerv
oua headache, aoomesa of the stomach, and
disagreeable belching may not be very bad
now, bat they will be If the stomach Is
suffered to grow weaker.
Dyspepsia Is such miserable disease
that the tendency to It should be given
early attention. This is completely over
which strengthens thewhole digestive system
Couldn't Pawn It
Mr. Straits It may seem a strange
thing for me to do on such a short
acquaintance, Miss Slasher, but I
have called to pledge you my love.
Miss Slasher You have made a
mistake, Mr. Straits. Miss Eisen
heffer, the pawnbroker's daughter,
lives in the next block.
The Summer Hotel.
Young Guest It seems to me that
you don't object to the mosquitoes
singing in your room.
Old Guest You bet I don't! Why,
when the mosquitoes are singing I
can't hear the university glee club
practicing on the piazza. . . .
Tha Bait Prescription for Malatfa) - -
Chills and Fever Is a bottle of drove's Tasteless
Chill Tonic. It Is simply iron and quinine in
a tasteless form. No Care, Mo Pay. Fries 50c.
Surely It Dots.
Daughter Which is correct, papa,
Miss Brown married Mr. bmith, or
Mr. Smith married Miss Brown?
Papa That depends, my child.
Had he the money, or had she?
"Education may be a good thing,"
said the man with the stubby mous
tache, "but if my parents had not
instilled in my mind so great a rev
erence for erammar I am almost sure
I could have been a poet." .
p;n'i Cure for Consumption is an infal
lible medicine for coughs and colds. N.
W. 3AMUEL. Ocean Grove, N. J., Feb. 17,
The Ruling Passion.
"I see that Masie has decorated her
room in the hotel with swords, guns,
pistols and foils.
"No wonder. She always was a
great girl for having arms around
' World's Record Apple.
British Columbia grew the worlds
record apple last year. -" It was 16
inches in circumference and weighed ;
one pound and three ounces. ; .
At Henlo Park, San Mateo Connty, Cel., with
its beautilHl, surroundings, perfect climate,
careful snperrision, thorough instruction,
complete laboratories, and gymnasium, easily
maintains Its position in the front ranks of
schools for dots on the Pacific Coast. Ira G.
Uoitt, Pb. P., Principal.
How She Knew.
Little Sister I guess you accepted
Mr. Sweetly. -
The Grown-up One What makes
you think so? - -
Little Sister He don't give me
candy any more.
YOV KNOW WHAT TOU ARB TAKINO
When von take Grove's Tasteless Chill Tonic,
because the formula is plainly printed on every
bottle showing that it Is simply Iron and Qui
nine In a tasteless form. No Core. No Pay. 50c.
" . Not Oysters Alone. - ! .:
Church Let's see; what is it we
have to go without in the months
without B? .
Gotham Heavy flannels.
Beware of Ointments for Catarrh That
- Contain Mercury, - .-'
As mercury will surely destroy the sense of
smell and completely derange the whole sys
tem when entering it through the macous sur
faces. Such articles should never be used ex
cept on prescriptions from reputable physi
cians, as the damage thev will do is ten fold to
the good you can possibly derive from them.
Hall's Catarrh Cure, manufactured by F. J.
Cheney & Co., Toledo, O., contains no mercury,
and is taken internally, acting directly upon
tbe blood and mucous surfaces of the system.
in buying Hall's Catarrh Cure be sure yon get
the genuine. It is taken internally, and made
in Toledo, Obio, by F. J. Cheney & Co. Testi
Sold by Druggists, price 75c per bottle.
Hall's Family Pills are the best, : .
. "Ifow can you go out
"What if he is?
nearly all on me."
He is such a
He spends it
;' . Try Before Ton Bay!
Ten cents buys a bos of Cascarets, bat if yon
want a free sample and booklet, adress Sterling
ttemeay company, unicagoor New YorK to-day!
Paul Revere' Invention.
Paul Eevere, ' the famous revolu
tionary hero,1 was an inventor and
was the first in fhis country to refine
and roll copper. The concern he
founded in 1801, the .Revere Copper
Co., still exists at Canton, Mass.
- Millions of little glands or tubes connect the blood with the skin, and through
these small drain pipes perspiration passes out, carrying with it the impurities that
are thrown off by the blood. Should the pores of the akin be entirely 'closed for
. even a brief space of time, and the poisonous matter forced back into the circula
tion, -instant death would result In addition to the sweat glands, the skin is
: provided with certain others which pour- out upon it an oily substance, keeping
the akin pliable and soft and protecting it from heat and cold. The blood and skin
are ao closely related that whatever affects one seriously-interferes with, the func
tions of the other. Not only health, but life itself, depends -upon perfect harmony
between the blood and skin. When, therefore, the ' . .
blood becomes poisoned from any cause, it quickly jf f Gfff Ski eSJf O
manifests itself upon the akin in the fomv. . .?
of sores and ulcers, pimple and various ' Xf 0Ae9f r0l90ti8
eruptive diseases. By the character of the .
sore we are enabled to determine the nature of the poison or humor in the blood,'
as every disease originating in the blood has its own peculiar sore or pimple. The
akin is not only affected by the poisons generated in the system, but poisons from
without enter through the open glands or pores and quickly infect the blood.
Mercury rubbed upon the skin will produce Rheumatism, and Poison Oak and Ivy
and other wild plants gain easy access to the blood through the skin. As so-called
. ; skin diseases originate in the blood, the application,
PUi0 Of OQIf of powders, soaps and washes can do no permanent
- good, but often do immense damage by
Soft Healthy Skllt .dosing up the outlet to these little tubes
. .. - , , . . . . i
or we um. iae treatment man dckiu wuu uib viuuu, nuu tiu. m uma
n.Wai;, a O S AM thia aiul mirifiM h rirmlarion tinilda
sp the blood and flushes the little glands or pores with' pure, new blood, and
restores healthy action to the skin. The use of cosmetics never yet brought health
and beauty to a rough, red, pimply- skin or sallow complexion. What is needed
is rich, pure blood, such: aa 8. S. & makes. It not only relieves you of all disfigur
ing blackheads, blotches and irritating, itchingeruptions, but improves your general
health. S. S. 8. contains no mercury, potash, arsenic or other mineral, but is a
purely vegetable remedy and the safest and best in all blood and skin troubles.
Write our physicians for advice or information ; they have made a study of blood
and skin diseases, and you can have the best medical advice without cost. Book o
Hood and Skin Disejwea free. JKE SWIFT SPECIFIC CO., ATLANTA, 6A-
" Repartee Ab Ovov
"Hello I" exclaimed the egg that
was still intact, "you appear to be all
- .Nevertheless, " replied the one in
the bowl of eggnoe, "I'm in good
so I observe. I suppose you 11 be
drunk in a little while."
- One Use for a Missionary.
Rev. Mr. Goodleigh I understand
that the last missionary that was here
was esteemed very much by you?
Chiei Uppi No, . sah; we roasted
him, sah. . , ;
A Balloon Ascenslonlst Killed.
A balloon ascensiouist was recently kill
ed while making one of his daring trips.
Life is too valuable to trifle with in fool
hardy adventures. It is better to employ
ourselves in peaceful pursuits where we
may be secure. Then if we take care of
our health, we can live to a good old age.
rue nest means ot prompting good neaitn
is Hostetter's Stomach Bitters. This med
icine cures dyspepsia, indigestion, consti
pation, flatulency and insomnia. Be sure
to try it.
Friday Not Unlucky, .
Quizz Do you think Friday an un
lucky day to move.
Bizz Not for me. I moved on
Friday and found out if I'd waited
until Saturday my goods would have
been attached for-rent.
The Teacher Iniured In a Run
away Accident and Reported ,
to Have Gone Insane.
In October, 1896, one - Monday
morning the Rushford school did not
open and . it was . reported that the
teacher had gone insane. ; The physi
cian, in attendance pronounced the
trouble nervous prostration and said
that school work was mentally and
physically impossible. The teacher,
who is now Mrs. L. A. Gullickson, of
Rushford, Minn., in a recent inter
view' published in the Star of that
place, gives the' true story of the event.
VTo begin at the beginning," she
said, "when I was about seven years
of age a sudden fright brought on a
dreadful condition ot nervousness.
When, in : 1896, - I was iniured in a
runaway accident, this, combined with'
my former; trouble, made me so ill
that I was unable to open school the
following Monday." - '
"Was it true that you were report
ed to be insane?" asked the- inter
viewer. - : -
Yes, and. the "members of my
family thought that I was becoming
so. Words do not express tne agony
I endured with my head and eyes.
The -least noise would cut through
my nerves like a knife. I was hot
and cold by . flashes, had piercing
pains in my temples and in the back
of my head and a red mist was con
stantly before my eyes.
I was dizzy and faint with .fearful
nausea, which nothing relieved. I
could take no solid ' food for 10 days,
but lived on milk and lime water.
When - the doctor had treated me for
nearly six weeks without helping me,
Mrs. J. : Webster, a nearby friend.
recommended Dr. Williams' Pink
Pills for Pale People. I took them
faithfully for not quite three months
and was perfectly cured.1 nave never
heard of a Bingle case where they did
not prove beneficial and know of sev
eral persons who have taken them suc
cessfully for rheumatism. "
Dr. Williams' Pink Pills for Pale
People are not like other medicines.
They act directly on the blood and
nerves. This makes them" invaluable
in such diseases as locomotor ataxia,
partial paralysis, . St. - Vitus' dance,
sciatica, neuralgia, rheumatism, nerv
ous headache, the, after effects of the
grip, palpitation of the heart, pale
and sallow complexions and all forms
of weakness either in male or female.
" ' At all druggists or direct from Dr,
Williams Medicine Co.', Schenectady,
N. Y. Price 50 cents per box ; six
boxes f 2.50. i; -
Our People well Fed.
, The people of the United States
are the best; fed people of -the world,
and consume more per head and year
than the 'inhabitants of any mother
country of the world. -
This signature is on every box of the genuine
Laxative Bromo-Quinine Tablets,
the remedy that esnres) a cold 1st one day
. . One Glance Was Enough.
Mr. Cityman What on earth do
you want with such an enormous
woodpile? - s .
Mr. Subbubs Protection "against
AN INDEX TO
a, vi J J .! : J .t :,.
By applying a prolonged pressure ot
18,000 pounds to the square Inch a
Montreal professor makes marble flow
like molasses. - y
The density of population in the
United States ia greatest In the Dis
trict of Columbia. There the number
of Inhabitants to the square mile Is
The late Professor Marsh, of Yale,
bequeathed his house and grounds for
a botanical garden. They are to-be
made the home of the newly created
School of Forestry. , . ,
A Kansas boy in China writes that
the custom of the Chinese in burying
their dead In mounds above the level
of the ground "makes the whole coun
try look like an exaggerated prairie
A revolutionary war claim for J400,
the original value of which was $46.09,
contracted under the act of 1779, has
Deen liquidated by the Treasury De
partment. The interest and principal
amounted to $12,906.20. ;
A special agent of the United States
Department of Agriculture reports
mat beyond v doubt grain - can-, be
matured anywhere in Alaska. Bar
ley, oats, wheat and rye have devel
oped perfectly from seed accidentally
sown and grown wild. Flax of good
quality has also been grown.
An Oklahoma country postmaster
sent the following notice to the postal
department: ' "Sur I wish to notify you
that on next Wednesday this offlc will
be shet as I am gone dear hunt You
kin fire me if you see fit, but I'll give
you apinter that I'm the only man in
the nayboruood that kin rede and rite.'
The most recent triumph of the
French postal administration is an In
genious little machine, which not only
automatically weighs letters and sam
ples, but records on an Indicator at
the Bide the amount required for
stamps. When the article deposited on
the balance exceeds the regulation
weight the' Indicator promptly hoists
the sign, "Too heavy." ' : . J
The plan of the Central Pacific Ball-
road -to cut. off- 107 miles by crossing
Great Salt Lake Involves a great engi
neering problem. The lake has to be
crossed at a point where it is thirty-
two mles wide, trestle-work being ne
cessitated -for the whole of the dis
tance, excepting two miles across the
rocky Promontory point. L The view
afforded passengers over tbe new route
will be novel and picturesque. ' -. - :
A notice board has been erected on
shore near to the naval anchorage at
Woo-Sung. China, with the following
information: "We open, at Woo-Sung,
on the south of the telegraph company,
for sale of foreign milk, the taste are
sweet, the milk are pure, the price are
Just. We have not put any water
In it If examine out won't pay single
cash. If you want to buy it you will
know the foreign r cow chop. : No. 1
milk. Ylh Plngshan dairy." ' "
The forestry department of the St
Louis fair intends to have an exhibi
tion that will be an object lesson to ail
who: see It of the practical side of wood
working in all Its phases and branches.
. It will show the woods of the country
and the uses to' which they are adapt
ed; it will endeavor to show where
they grow, at what price the standing
timber can be bought,-the -size of the
tract, accessibility and everything that
a prospective purchaser would want to
know. ... " - - ; '' ; ; .
" Wolves are ? increasing rapidly In
" many parts of the forest lands of
Northern Canada. This is undoubted
ly- due to : the large increase in the
herds of deer throughout the country.
As these, have grown .in numbers so
have the wolves that live upon them.
Fleeing from the ravages of the wolves
the' deer have made their way toward
the settled parts of the country, until
in many places they have become a
nuisance to farmers, in whose fields of
oats and other grain they often do con
siderable damage. .' iA-t...
The managers of a department store
in Harlem, N. Y., have rescued Charles
Krelg, one of their employes, from: the
clutches of particularly. t rapacious
loan shark. , In 1898 he borrowed $20,
giving his note, and receiving only $14,
the remainder being retained as com
mission. ; The note has. been renewed
over and over again, $6 being deducted
each time, .and although he had made
many payments the loan sharks de
clared he still owed them $196. Threats
of persecution for usury Induced them
to cancel the note on payment of $14-
Forgot and Kissed the tjueen.-
Courtly old Richard Vaux, of Phila
delphia, could boast that he had danced
wun yueen victoria, Dut there was a
young. American girl, who went even
further, for she kissed the queen. And
it, was not much of a day for kissing
queens, at that as the Anglo-American
tells the Incident' "
;She was an . American debutante,
young and pretty,; and in her confusion
in making the courtesy, she committed
the frightful solecism of kissing her
majesty. Instantly recognizing the
enormity of her offense, the poor girl
nearly fainted. .' ' r ;
' She hurried home in the most dis
tressed state of mind. The American
minister, was Immediately summoned,
and was asked by her parents to pre
sent her abject apologies through the
Simultaneously the minister received
a note from her majesty's secretary,
saying, that Victoria recognized the
young girl's embarrassment and sent
her an invitation to a state dinner. ; Of
course this not only silenced all ad
verse criticism, but opened, at once to
the young woman every door of fash
lonable London.- - -.. i .
Her Day Out.
Thft f Q i1 IT. - wtiraA . mnm - T'
I uui, -
. wf ,,i ann.v about vnnr loatntr ,, v,,,
A aWtU1 OTT aOOUt OUr 81Ug your hUS-
band, and I'd like to make things agree
able to you, but I see you have set the
funeral for Thursday. You'll have to
change It . . .
The Mistress Have to change it
The Maid You can't-have forgotten,
mem, that it is my day out Boston
To Hloihoro of
Ia this workaday world few women
are so placed that physical exertion
fa not constantly demanded of them in
their daily life.
. We make a special appeal to mothers
ef large families) whose work ia nevei
done, and many of whom suffer, and
sailer for lack of intelligent aid.
,-- To women, young or old, rich or
poor, we extend an invitation to accept
free advioa. Oh, women I do not let
Has. Gaunt Baxtavrms.
your lives be sacrificed when a word of
advice at the first approach of weak
ness, may fill your future years with
healthy joy. - Address a letter to Mrs.
Pinkham's Laboratory,! Lynn Mass. ,
and yon will not be disappointed.: :
"When 1 began to take Lydia E.
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound I was.
not able to do my housework. I suf
fered terribly at time of menstruation.
Several doctors told me they could dc
nothing for me. Thanks to the Pink
ham advice- and medicine I am now
well, and cast do the work for eight la
the family. - -. . .. -
"I would recommend Lydia E. Pink
ham's Vegetable Compound to all
mothers with large families." Mrs
CAkxIK BaXXKvnxE, Ludington, Mich
' Prepared for ' the Worst v
- "Yes, ; Briscbm's wife ' insists i
running their auto." "-. :i: .
. "I - noticed the fact - when they
passed. But why does Briscom sit in
that cramped position? .
"He's all braced for a hasty jump.
. TO OfJBI A COLD IN OKI DAT
Take laxative Bramo Ouinine Tablets. All
iroggists refund the money if it fails to care.
C W. urove's signature is on eacn oox. itao,
- York in Australia. -
- Western Australia ' has in York a
well : known- pastoral district which
bears a ; peculiarly appropriate name
in association with the visit to Aus
tralasia of the Duke and Duchess of
Cornwall and York. It was first peo
pled by immigrants mainly from
-u:- f . -.V-'
Little Liver Pills.
Must Bear Signature of '
- . 4s Pac-Simlle Wrapper Below.
Tavy sjaaan amd aa easy
Mtaave assneaz. -
FOR HEADACHE ; .-
FOR R1U0USIESS. - .
FOR TORPID LIVER.
FOR CONSTIPATION. .
FOR SALLOW SKIN.
FOR THE COMPLEXION
CURE 8ICK HEADACHE.
.. His Egg Business. -"I
am going into the egg business, "
said one city man to another.
JBut chickens are difficult to man
age in any considerable number, I am
told." J . -
"I intend to dispense with chickens
entirely, i shall simply raise egg
plants." c. - - . .-; .
CITft Pannanentlr Cured.
No fit mt nervonsnet
after Ant d&v'i urof 1r. Klin.'s Orrat herrc
BMtonr. Send rorFB.BE94.00triallxttleaDd treat
; " '-ggrieved Woman Aquitttd.
-A woman r in ''Adrian, Mich.,who
protested without avail against a
gambling den which got all her hus
band's earnings, set out with a can of
kerosene and burned the place to the
ground. . She was acquitted in court.
War Mm Off Ihm Botd. -
Laxative Bromo)uinine Tablets enre a cold In
one day. .No core. No Pay. Price 26 cents.
Accurate Description. ..--
"What t kind of cover - is that on
your umbrella?" asked the inquisi
; "Well, "answered the unblushing
personr "judging by the way it came
into my possession and the way . it
will probably-depart, I should call
it a changeable silk."
'' Vothers wilt find Mrs. Winslow's Sooth
ine Syrup the best remedy to use tor their
emidren during the teething period.
Traveling' With Ox Teams. ; ;
A novel vacation trip is being taken
by Banker Jenkins and a party -of
eleven friends,, from Carrelton. JCan.
They are traveling across the state
of 1 Colorado . in an old style prairie
schooner behind relays of oxen spans.
WhtUt ALL tXM f MLS.
syrup. Taaws wmu.
Bow DT qrngK'w.
I (Beat Uracil
I m time.
ONE EXPERIENCE CNOUQH.
Farmer Telia How He Tried to Corner
Corn and Failed. -
"Durndest experience -1 ever had,
said the old farmer who was cautioning
his son against speculation, according
to the Detroit Free Press. "Oome
mighty nigh rulnin' me. - You fellers
here In Detroit don't know nothln' 'bout
It You kin squirm an' wriggle an' get
on yer feet someways, but there me an'
Jim was out there in the las' row o'
townships with no bank fur to draw on
an' both our farms mortgaged up to the
"How did it happen, dad?" Inquired
the son, who has been on the right side
of the market often enough to make
"Me an' Jim started In fur to cor
ner corn. I see a piece in the county
paper tellin how the thing was done,
an' I read it to Jim. Jim was the all-
firedest excited man you ever see and
calculated that there wasn't . nuthin'
anybody else could do that me an' him
couldn't do.- So we slips round an'
bought in all the corn in the county,
paying a average of 85 cents a bushel.
We only give out cash where we had
to and the rest got our j'lnt notes. It
jest , 'bout filled up Jim's double-decker
barn, and when the stuff was all cor
nered there we sat back and counted
up what we was agoin' to make.
Ike Simmons kim 'round and wanted
ter git ten bushel ter keep fur seedin'.
I asked him .a plum dollar a bushel and
tole him he needn't take It less he
liked. We argied and then we clinched
and he was wrapping me 'round a apple
tree when yer maw interfered. Me an'
Jim had four or five pitched battles
like that and was figurin' on glttin
shot guns at wholesale by takln' two
when we found out that all the farmers
up there was buyin' corn from the
counties j'inin. They were so dinged
mad they wouldn't give us nothln' for
ours an' we had to haul it sixteen miles
and sell It to a banker with a elervator
fur 20 cents a bushel. - Took me ten
years hard labor ter git even, and 1
never had no use fur corners or specu
lators or bankers since, t Keep outen it
me boy." I-.':; -.:';-':
CAUGHT AT HIS OWN
Confidence Man Waa Too
. . with tne Supposed Farmer.
Waiting at the union depot was a
round-faced man with an attractive
countenance, eyes that Invited confi
dence and rather long hair that waved
from a fine forehead. He was dressed
In clericals and looked the part. When
the old farmer took a seat after buying
a ticket for Ypsilanti the two fell into
conversation.. - :'. -.,..."'-. ,; V.i;V
The minister brought the talk around
to pickpockets and men who fool you
out of your money,' and expressed a
great dread of them, runs a story In
the Detroit Free Press. : He clung to
this topic until the noise of a row was
heard from the outside and he express
ed a desire to see what was the mat
ter. . . .
"Come on," he shouted, as he started.
"No, my friend," replied the farmer,
"not if you have any money about you.
It is sure to be taken from you in a
rough crowd like that" . - r tr;- -r -
"Here, you hold It and my watch un
til I run out a few minutes, and then
I'll hold your 'valuables while you go."
"All right, don't be too long," and the
farmer accepted his trust -
When the minister returned the far
mer was gone. Never did a clerical
masquerade come to a quicker end. He
rushed around muttering, things pro
fane,1 kept his hand In his hip pocket
and told everybody but the policeman
that he could lick any farmer that ever
wore shoe leather. .Half an hour later
he was making things blue. "I'll know
him-if I ever see him again, I don't care
how he's dressed, and I'll cut him into
Inch squares. - I don't 'low any man to
make a sucker of me and live to blow
about It?. . ... , : , . . .. .' , ' . ...
"Some guy cross-counter oh the con
game, Dick?" , r j ; -
"None cf your business; but If -that
mug didn't do the farmer as well as 1
did the sky-pilot I'll jump off the dock.
He had a bunch with him as thick as
your arm, too. But he's got all my stuff
and some lamb's got to' make good."
It had simply been a case of diamond
cut diamond.' f: .
, Electrio Eel's Victim.
At the Zoological 'Gardens a 5 large
electric eel was swimming In its tank
with more activity than usual," when a
big cockroach fell in the water, and in
its efforts to get out made a disturb
ance of the surface, which attracted
the attention of the eel. "The eel turned
around, swam past it, discharged Its
battery' at aboutelght iochea off, and
the cockroach instantly stopped stone
dead. It did not even move Its anten
nae after. The eel then proceeded' to
swallow its victim, and the narrator
goes on to point out the curious eircum
stance that the fish, which weighed
about .twelve pounds, should find It
worth while to fire its heavy artillery at
a creature an Inch and' a half long,
when It could easily have swallowed It
sans facon. Chambers' Journal.
- "Fint State in the Union."
A dapper young negro applied at the
Treasury Department- for a 'position
just as the reporter of the Washington
Star happened along.. .
'What can you do?" asked one of the
secretaries. " " -
"Anything, sah, anything."
-"What State are you from?" ,
He drew, himself up- proudly. - "I'm
from the first State in the Union, sah,
"No, sah; Alabama, sah."
"But Alabama Isn't the first State in
the Union." ,
. "Alphabetically speaking, sah; alpha
betically speaking." , -
"I rather fancy this," said Misa Thur-
Ood," trying on a very girlish , hat
."Well,", remarked the milliner, un
guardedly, "that would be becoming
to young ladles of a eertaln age."
"And you mean to say my age is un
-."Well; er yes. . Until. a young wom
an gets to be 24 or 25 her age Is always
uncertain. That hat's too old for you."
" V Russian Railways.
- Russian railways are the most dan
gerous In the world. : Thirty persons
in every million passengers are either
killed or hurt .
When the statue of Washington
was unveiled at Paris last summer a
happy group of American students
were waking the echoes from time to
time with their college yell. One
French woman said nervously to an
other, VWhy do they make that
Her companion answered with calm
superiority, "My dear, its the savage
in them I"
The Grip of Etiquette.
"What? Marry you?" cried the fair
young girl. "Why, you are only an
apology for a man."
True," he sighed: "but you are
not so lacking in courtesy as to fail
to accept an apology."
Her boarding house etiquette for
bade her flying in the face of conven
tion, so she resigned herself to fate.
." Another Thing.
"Yes, I'm studying French.
going to take a run over . to
"So you think that will helo vou.
"Why, certainly. It's easy enough
to speak the language. "
"Yes, but it's hard to make the
Frenchman understand it."
Knew His Failings.
Mr. Homely is not a beauty and he
knows it. When his first baby was
born he asked :
"Does it look like me?"
Of course they said yes.
"Well," said he, "you must break
to my wile gently. "
The Gentle Beggar. -
"I'm hungry, sir," said the beeear.
"Won't you give.me enough to get a
"Here", my good man," said Mr,
Pompus, "here's a penny for you.'
"OJ thank you, sir. By the way,
have you a pepsin tablet about you?
I always get dyspepsia when I overeat
myselt." : ' '
FARM MACHINERY AND SUPPLIES,
Wm Qumrmntmm ' -
That the Eccentric Sprocket Wheel on this
machine will rive an absolute eain of I6K Der
cent of -power at time of tieing and discharging
The Force-feed Elevator will waste less grain
than rnr other. There is less shattering.
The Relief Rake keens inner end of platform
Everyone ot 'those using Champion Binder
says it has no equal.
SEND FOR CATALOGUE.
Mitchell, Lewis & Staver Co.,
First and Taylor Sts. .. PORTLAND, OB I
-t m aisram aaaT "afA"afwsf
M MM fti SM lrs ST E.W
Agents wanted In every town.
THE AULTMAN & TAYLOR MACHINERY
- r. :. . - i turners ol mgn uraae -
THRESHERS, CLOVER HULLERS, HORSE POWERS, TRACTION
J AMD FARM ENGINES AND BOILERS, SAW MILLS, ETC ,
EDWARD HUGHES, General Agent.
Catalogue Mailed Free. . -
Chamber of Commerce,
i:-;, PORTLAND, OREGON. -
. Degraded for Religious Scruples.
An Austrian officer, the Marchese
Tacoli, declined a challenge on ac
count of religious scruples two years
ago. . He was not only degraded from
his rank, but has Deen oruerea to
serve out his time as a private in Ihe
ranks. :''':.-'' .' '
, Poems by King James L
' An interesting literary discovery is
reported from Oxford, where a num
ber of hitherto .'unknown poems by
King James I have been found in the
Bodleian library. They are stated
to : fee undoubtedly genuine and bear
the royal autograph. --s.-.-.u
; -'-7 Damage-Suit lawyer's Wealth.,
1 A lawyer named Patterson died a
few; days 'ago in Brooklyn, leaving
about 1,000,000, nearly all .made by
conducting damage suits in cases of
accidents and personal injuries, . the
defendants being - chiefly street rail
road and similar corporations. ; '
I Sullivan's Instruments Sold WelL
Sixteen " of the violins and violon
cellos owned by the late Sir- Arthur
Sullivan were, recently . sold for $1,
800. The greatest price realized for
any one of the instruments' was $850,
which was paid for a violoncello by
Joseph Guarnerius. - - T.' ' .
. Sweetmeats for Wives. . .
At the "stag dinner" of the Fish
mongers' company in London each
man gets a casket of sweetmeats to
carry home to his wife.. And the out
side caskets make neat work baskets.
Quakers iii Cuba.
One of the curiosities of Cuba is a
Quaker meeting house which has been
erected . at Gibara, near Santiago.
The congregation of Friends is said to
number over 200. : - :', '- -
- Live UpStairs and Be Healthy.
Scientists have declared that the
purest air in cities is found about 52
feet' above the street,, and hence it is
concluded that the healthiest apart
ments are those on the third floor. .
k. r. x. D.
WHKN writing t advertiaeTS
aneutloai this paper. - -
Peculiar to Summer Weather
Promptly Cured by Pe-ru-na.
MISS MARIE COATS. 1
Miss Marie Coats, president ot the
Appleton Young Ladies' Club, writes
the following concerning Peruna:
rr. Appleton, Wis.
The Peruna Medicine Co.,-. Colum
bus, O. :
Gentlemen "I find Peruna an ex
cellent spring and summer medicine
and am glad to call the attention of
my friends to it. ! When thut languid,
tired feeling comes over you, and
your food no longer tastes good, and
small annoyances irritates you, Peru
na will make you feel like another
person inside of a week. I have now
used it for three seasons and find it
very reliable and efficacious." Marie
If you do not derive prompt and
satisfactory results from the use of
Peruna, write at once to Dr. Hart
man, giving a full statement of your
case and he .will be pleased, to give
you his valuable advice gratis. "
Address Dr. Hartman, president' of
The Hartman Sanitarium, Columbus,
JOHN POOLE, Portland, Oregon,
. Foot of Morrison Street
Can give you the best bargains in
Baggies, Plows, Boilers and Engines,
Windmills and Pumps and General
Machinery. ' See us before buying
Where do You
Sell Your Hides ? thy me.
. We always pay the Highest Price. . - r
Chasm Lm Mastick & Co.
75 Front St., cor. Oak, Portland, Or.
A GREAT FIRE SALE.
Of $5,000. Stock of the New York Dry Goods
Co.'s goods, Daraeg.d by Water o.ilv, is p'aced
on aaleat THE LEADER at one-half, aqd la
some cases, one-tenth its value. -
The stock consists of almost everything in
the line of Dry Go. dd and leneritl Meic.ian
d so, and being a Wholesale one will continue
for ten days, at least, and there there will be
plenty for everyone.
Let everybody come. The opportunity of a
lifetime. At THE LEADER,
. . . The People's Bargain Store,
710Second are., Seattle Wash.
The Perfection of Wall Plaster1, will not fall off, even
though a leakage occur by the bursting of water pipes.
Sena ns your aaaress ana receive circular
showing what others have gained by the use of
: THE ADAMANT GO.,
Foot of 14th Street. Portlmnd, OragNMt.
I82 - 18B Madison St., Portland, Oregon.
- Secures patents for inventions
In the United States and foreign
countries. Also negotiates mar
kets and defends patent inven
No better terms or facilities
than we offer obtainable anywhere.-
Payment of our fees
may be deferred till patent is
allowed. Write for pamphlet.. -
BEST FOR THE
If yon hares' a rennlar, bealtbr movement of tta
bowels ererj 4ay, you're sick, or will be. Keep your
bowels open, and be well. Force, in tbesnapeof
rtolent pnysie or pill poison, is dangerous. Tbe
(imootbest. easiest, most perfect way of keeping tb
sew ls clear and clean is to take
neasant Palatable. Potent Taste Good . Do G ood,
KeTer Sicken, Weaken, or Gripe. 10c. fiOc Writ
for free sample, and booklet on bealtB. Address
atari! ItMdrfMiwr, Chleatf. nmtr Kmt Tots, mm
KEEP YOUR BLOOD GLEAN
m y A w ruAiir nie ma i iib ad
luivn uifc, iniaUa, vi .
IT WILL "
KEEP YOU DRY
IN THE -
OOf, fOR ABOVE TBAOE tVSK
ON SALE EVERYWHERE.
CATALOGUES FCEE I
aiOWlNfi PULL tfNE OPfiARriENTJ AND HATi
A.J.TOWER COL BOSTON. MA55.
BICKFORD. Wiahlnslon, D. C. tber will re
ceive Quick renlies. B. 5lh N. H. Vol. Staff
20th Corps. Prosecuting claims since 187a. -
is best time to enre Catarrh,
Bronchitis and Consnmption.'
Oar remedy is guaranteed. Si.
.. P.O. Box 973. - .
2 CO., Buffalo, H. T.
Sum xer Resolutions
Sore relief fi om liqnor, opium and tobacca
habiti. Send lor particulars to
W. H. SMITH
l Caslsy Institute,
Moved to 40 Wlllisma
Ave., East Side.