The Columbian., October 17, 1884, Image 1

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ST. HELENS, COLUMBIA COUNTY, OREGON, OCTOBER 17, 1884.
VOL. V.
NO. 11.
THE COLUMBIAN.
V MM A
-L. V JJjiLf -il a SxJL. N o
IN THE AFTERNOON.
James Whiteomb Riley. J
Von in the hanimo-k:anI I, nearby.
Was trying to read. ani to swing you. too;
And the jroen of the swani was so kind to
t h eyv.
Ami the ahadn of the maple so cool and
hu,
That often I looked from the lxk to you
To say a-s much, with a sigh.
You in the hammock. The book we'd brought
From thu parlor to read in the open air
Something of lovo and of Launcelot
And Guinevere, I believe, was there
But the afternoon, it was far more fair
Than the poem was, I thought.
You in the hammock; and on and on
I droned and droned through the rhythmic
stuir
Hut. w iih always a half of my vision gone
Over the top of the page enough
To caressingly gaze y ,u,- j' .t!ied iu the
f.urf
Of your hair and your odorous "lawn."
You in the hammock and that was a year
Fully a yi-ar ago, I guess
And w'but do we care for their Guinevere
And b-a- Iauncelot and their lordliness:
You in the hammock still, and yes
Kiss me again my dear!
CREMATION ON THE COLORADO.-
Iiitereatlns Account Given by an Eiiff
' Mali JIajgazlue.
l'all Mall Gazette. )
Here is an account of a cremation
among the North American Indians, the
Cocopa tribe, on the Colorado river: A
short distance from the collection of
thatched huts wliich composed the vil
lage a shallow ditch had been dug in the
desert, in which were laid logs of the
mesouite, hard and dense wood, which
makes, as all western campaigners know,
a very hot tire with little flame or smoke.
After a short time the body was brought
from the village, surrounded by the
family and other inhabitants, and laid
on the logs in the trench. The relatives,
as usual with Indians, had their
faces disfigured with black paint, and
the females, as is the custom with other
savages, madp very loud exclamations of
grief, mingled with what -night be sun
pose.l to le Amend songs. Smaller
lagots were then )?hi"ed ol. top, a few
personal efftcts of the dead ma a added,
and lire applkd.
After a time a dense mass of dark-
colored smoke arose, and the burning of
the body, winch was much emaciated,
proceeded rapidlv. I (savs the eve-
witness) began to be- rather tired of the
spectacle, and was about to go awav,
when one of the Indians, in a few words
of Spanish, told me to remain, as there
was something yet to be seen. An old
man then advanced from the assemblage
with a long pointed stick in his hand.
Going near to the burning body he re
moved the eyes, holding, them succes
sively in the direction of the sun. with
his face turned toward that luminary,
repeating at the sanie time some words
which 1 understood from our guide were
. a prayer for th happiness of the soul of
the deceased. Alter Hs. iore fagots
were heaed on the ;ire, which was kept
up for jHi-haps three or four hours
longer. 1 did not remain, as there was:
nothing more of interest, but I learned'
on , inquiry that after the fire was
burned out it was the custom to collect
the fragments of bone which remained
and put them in a terra-cotta vase,
which was kept up under the care of the
family.
Chloroform for Cholera.
Gen. Jordou of The Mining Record.
A tablespoonful of chloroform in about
four times as much water is an infalli
ble cure for cholera. A doctor who had
lived in Mobile, Ala., and had great suc
cess in curing people during a cholera
epidemic there, told me about it. When,
in the Cubian revolution. I went to
Cuba to help organize the insurgent
army, I had a chance to try the remedy,
for a cholera epidemic broke out among
the troops. My first experiment was on
a negro who was in the last stages. It
cured him and hundreds after him.
When we marched the officers carried
bottles of chloroform, and if a man fell
out, sick with cholera, the remedy was
applied and he was able to resume his
place. I have seen men lying on the
roadside in a state of collapse, almost
dead. An officer would ride up, dis
mount and apply the remedy, and be
fore the column had passed the man
would be in the ranks again.
L.oii-Talled Rootter.
San Francisco Chronicle.
By the steamship City of Tokio there
arrived at San Francisco from China
fourteen coops of-fancy chickens for the
zoological gardens at London. These
fowls have been procured at great ex
pen.se. and come of strains of gnat an
tiquity, some of them, it is claimed,
having leen in the family of a mandarin
in central China for over 300 years,
and none of them have ever been sold
before. They cost $7 apiece. The birds
vary in Mze and color, but the most
striking feature is the length of the tail
feather of the cocks, .some them being
eight feet long. The.-e feathers are folded
in a roll and wrapped with ribbon to pre
vent injury while en route.
To JIake Coal Gm.
Philadelphia Call.)
The preparation of coal gas may be ef
fected in miniat ure by means of a com
mon ''long clay" tobacco pie. The
low! must )e nearly rilled with coarsely
powdered coal, and must be sealed up
with a cover of moist clay. When the
clay has sufficiently dried, the bowl must
be exposed to a red heat in an ordinary
lire-grate. The gas, with a quantity of
smoke, will soon be generated and can
be lighted at the mouth-piece of the pipe.
The residue left in the now red-hot bowl
of the pipe is a lump of nearly pure car
bon in the form of coke.
Ac-cuuulln for Koine JTI e a n
Dog.
Detroit Free Press.
It is believed in Holderness that if a
man has a favorite dog, or if the dog is
very fond of him, when the man dies
his soul will go into the dog and stay
there until the dog dies. This will ac
count for the existence of Borne mighty
mean doss.
Washington Hatchet: De Smith
What's the reason, I wonder, the electric
lights always go out during a thunder
storm? Van Jones Professional jeal
ousy, I suppose.
The Egyptian lotus grows in this coun
try at Jones' creek, Maryland, and at
the mouth of the Raisin river and along
the River Rouge in Michigan.
TWO NOTED AUTHORS.
Ai Chat Willi Mayite field Thre
.Tllituten wHIi Charles Iteade.
ll.nke Miarp in Detroit Free Press.
A little over a year ago poor old
Capt. Mayne Beid moved up from his
country place near Ross, in Hereford
shire, to Loudon, where he died. It was
his custom to come to London during
what is called the "season," and he gen
erally occupied rooms in the Langham
hotel or lodgiugs in Bloomsbury. 15 ut
the move 1 speak of was cau ed by in
creasing infirmity, and he came up to
London to get the benefit of the expert
medical attendaace which the metrop
olis afforded, him, and it was the last
move he ever made. In a scrap-book I
have just turned up the letter which he
wrote to Hie. Afier speaking of so no
Dersonal matters he said:
"I am helpless as a child; completely
'.crippled and cannot move from my
!cha r. Come up and see me, for I can
;now grimly say my frit n Is will always
t'nd me af home. I liae taken a fur
nished house at 12 Bloouifield ro.uI,
with a pleasant bit of garden at the
back, lhincs are all in confusion so
far. but if you come 1 11 not make you
set out our supper as when the bell
rope broke ;.t Bedford street. If The
1 ree 1 re.-s with that Chepultepec
article is not out of print I Would be.
verv much obiicred for a few more
copies. My stock is exhausted.
" Your fr .'end.
"Mayse Rhid
"P. S. Come up to-night; 12 Bloom-
field road, right hand of anal, 'lius
from harintr Cross passes end of
a reet. "M. li.
"i he writing is in a heavy hand, big,
upright letters, six words to a page,
as the printers used to sav. The bell
ro)e incident he spoke of referred to a
visit I paid him at his lodgings at lieu
ford street, when with semi military
impatience that vas characteristic of
him he gave a jerk to the bell-rope
whk-h hunir with it b:? tassel bv the
side of the Jire-rdace, and the wi'-e
s.'ipovl at Va c eiling. The captain
who was sitting in big u arm-chair with
his right foot heavily swathed on a
common chair, before him, and a glass
of favorite hot tipple at his elbow,
Baid :
"All communications with the e.iemv
are now cut off. The garrison will be
stormed if voa do not form voui-selt
into a forlorn hope and go dowii into
the kitt hn un I get help. 1 o i see, the
rest of the army is in thehos ntal. '
Iiut as I had volunteered to go f r
help the captain remembeied that the
supples we.e in the huge mahogany
sideboard at the end of the rojm. and
so he sat there and dire te I the ex
ploring party while I followed his di
rections, and soon had a most excellent
cold Iuneh spi-ead out on the table, un
corked a couple of bottles of I'ass, and
thus -was starvation ouVf a or staved off.
On getting the IetfV J F- -a quoted
above. I made up a "parcel ol The Free
Presses
that Capt.
Reid wanted and
walked
up the e
er busy Strand to
Charing Cross.
Do vou know
where Blooinfield
road is?" I asked
the first 'bus con-
ductor. ;
"Pass the end of it, sir," he replio 1,
and without more ado 1 climbed to the
top.
Bloomfield road proved to be a long
way out to the west. . We went past the
National gallery, up Legent street,
along Oxford street, past the Marble
Arch, that might be ebony for all the
smoke of London has left of its white
ness : along the north side of Hyde park
and Kensington gardens ; through Hays
water ; over one railway and under an
other: past the triangular green spot
near Shepherd's. Then into the Cx-brid.-e
load, when the 'bus man hauled
up and sa:d :
"Bloomfield road, sir!"
I got off and speedily found No. 12
as one of a row of terrace houses with
very little indications of a 1 -asant
garden at the back or a canal at either
hand. I r ng, and a frowsy girl ap
peared at the door.
"Capt. Reid, sir ? No sir, don t live
'ere, sir. No, never heard of 'im,
j-ir."
"Do you mean Mr. Reade, the au
thor?" said a voice from the parlor, and
the next moment the lady of the house
appeared at the parlor door.
"Yes,M answered.
"Well, he lives in that large s juare
brick house at the corner of RIoomtield
load, facing the Uxbridge road."
I thanked the lady ami left.
The corner house stood in a large
garden that was completely surroun 'e I
by a high brick wall. A ring at the
bell brought a mddle-ag d servant to
the door, who looked rather sour and
suspiciously at me, and kept my card
kind of at arm's length, as it wee, as
if I were not at all the so t of person
that she approved of, and that really
they had no old clothes or broken
victuals to give away. My bundle of
papers seemed to add to my unpromis
ing appearance. She said, sullenly:
"Mr. Reade is not feeling well to
day. He is not seeing any one to
day." "I know that," I said, rafln r shortly.
"Rut Mr. Reid 6ent for mo, and if you
take that card to him I guess you'll find
he'll j-ee rno."
Si.e shut the door in my face, and 1
was at a loss wiiether to go or stay
Ju-.t as I turned to go away the door
opi ned again and she a ked me to come
in, but I could see that her good
opinion of me had not increased in the
interal. I was shown into a room that
was half parlor and half recept on-,
room. The next moment I heard a
slippered step come shu'llirg along the
uncarpeted hall, and a middle-si ed old
man, with short and thick gray beard,
a bla k silk skull-cap, a long dressing
gown with dangling tassels, stod at
the door looking at me with knit brows
over his glas-es, as if trying to recol
lect me. Then he glanced at the card
in his hand and said:
"i really have no recollection " then
he panted and looked inquiringly at me
oer his gla ses again.
"1 a ti afraid 1 have made a mistake,"
I aid, "I expected to see Capt. Mayne
Reid. I was directed here."
''We'l," said the old gentleman
qui. tl "I think my neighbors might
know better than direct you here. If it
were a man lees celebrated than Capt.
Mayn Rid I might be Urnpted to teli
the duke of Wellington story. My name
is Charles Reade."
I apo!ogized for my intrusion and
tried to express my pleasure at so un
expectedly seeing so celebrated a man.
1 ad.nit I was rather confused. I should
of course, have interviewed him then
and there, but I lost my presence of
mind. As we stood in the hall 1 ven
tured to ask him what the duke of
Wellington story was.
"Oh, no doubt you've heard it," said
the author. "It runs something to the
effect that some one said to the duke
that a certain Jones ha I often been
taken for him, and the duke 6aid that
it was rather remarkable, as he had
never leen taken for Jones."
Charles Reade s iw me to the door
himself, and that was the first and last
time. I ever sa' him. Thinking over
the matter I could not help wondering
at his mild and gentle manner and soft,
low voice, for judging by the somewhat
rabid letters he had written 1 would
have expected him to" be a . loud
mouthed, irritable man of the style of
Anthony Trollopo.
The next evening I found Capt. V a ne
Reid snuily quartered at his hens in
the north of London, No. 12 Rloomrield
read. Maiden hill, and if he had added
those last two words to the address 1
would probably never have seen Mr.
Charbs Reade.
Aaron Burr's Vlrt Duel.
New York Star.
Burr, during the summer of 1799,
Io-st patience under the attacks of Ham
ilton s partisans. He especially re
sented a rumor that had been started,
to the effect that for legislative services
rendered by him the Holland company
had cancelled a bond against him for
2',0tKj. Rurr cast about for the au
thor ot this rumor, intent on obtaining
satisaction. John B. t hurcii, a
distinguished New Yorker, the umle
of haniilton, wa heard openly
repeat. ug the story as a fact,
and him Burr held responsible, end
in u him a challenge to mortal combat ,
wiik ii w s promptly accepted. They
met at rob)ivrn. Church hud for his
second oi e Abijch Hammond, while
Burr was ttttenJej by Judge .Burke of
South Carolina. The serious affair
ended in a joke that amused all New
York and furnished a popular by-word
in the city for some time.
On the morning of the duel, when
l'urr, before leaving home, hanJed his
second, Judge Burke, his pistol case,
he explained that the ba'.ls were cast
intentionally too small, and thatcl amois
leather, cut the proper size, must be
greased and put l o nd them t make
them fit. The leatlurand grea-e were
in the case. When the principal- had
taken their stand. Burr, who had
noticed that the judge had beeu trying
to hammer the ramrod in with a stone,
remarked as he took the weapon fro:n
his hand, that the ball ha I not been
driven home.
"1 kiiuw it," replied Burke with the
spirit of Mr Lucius O'Trigger. "I for-
cot to n-ease the leather; but dou't
keep vour man waiting just take a
crack at him as it is, aud I'll grease the
next.
Burr bowed grim aud gracious in ac
quiescence, to the horror of his antag
onist, and took his place. Shots were
exchanged without effec', and' then
Church made haste to apologize, and
the attair was over with a hearty laugh
as the consequence.
A Hofttuii Irug Uruuiiurr.
lExcLanse. '
"Well, you see, he was traveling for
a Boston drug house, and was pretty
much of a uude. He had an end seat
in the car that went over first, and after
the excitement, when -all the other
boys had got out, and were doing what
thev could to save the balance of the
people, they discovered that the Boston
man was missing. They skirmished
around awhile in the debris, and in the
second car found Mr. Boston crawling
through a window. Boston caught
on at once, and, looking up at
the crowd, said coolly and with
a drawl: 'Aw, gentlemen, I we
ally beg pahdon faw causing
you any delay or uneasiness, . but you
know theah ah a dozen pa Bengalis or
moah in that bottom cah, and weally,
you know, I couldn't teah myself away
until 1 had taken their ordahs for court
plastah and ahnica. I have them down
in my biok, and if you will diwect
me to the nearest telegraph station,
you w.ll not only have my esteem aiid
that of my house, but also that of a
numbah of suff.hwing fellow passen
gahs.' It showed more gall than any
thing I ever saw, and the boys showed
him to the telegraph office before they
could recover from the shock."
There was nothing more said by any
body. "Powerful" Important lluiiie.
Texas Siftings.)
The governor of Arkansaw looked up
as the door of nis private office opened.
An o'.d fellow entered, and, without
speak ng, sat down, and in a perplexed
way, began to turn his hat round aud
round.
"I am very busy to-day," said the
governor, when he saw that his visitor
was in no hurry to state his business.
"Yi.s, I reckin you're kep putty
straight. I would'nter come up, but I've
got some powerful important matter
fur you to 'tend to."
I cannot attend to an v business to
day." "But it's m'ghty important."
"I tell you that I haven't time. I am
deliberating whether or not to send a
telegram staying the death penalty of
a man."
"My business ia more important."
"What is it?"
"I've got a sick hoss around at the
wagon yard."
"What." exc.'aimed the governor,
arising and throwing aside his papers.
"A sick horse ; why didn't you tell me
sooner? Come on."
Winer Than the Doctor.
Phrenological Journal, j
Seven Leavenworth doctors were
gathered around a man who fell on the
walk. Four called it sunstroke, and
the others, said it was a fit. Along
came a small boy, and proved it was
banaua-peel.
"Generous to a fault" is sometimes
said of men who really are generoue
only to their own faults.
THE RAT-CATCHER OF PARA.
The Boa Constrictor of Brazil and
the Work Ih Doe.
Para Cor. Pittsburg Chronicle.
The rat-catcher of Para is not a cat, an
owl, a ferret, a compound of wire and
springs, a paste of poison, a terrier, nor
an ambitious boy with a borrowed shot
gun and the fragments of three fingers
on his left hand and otherwise mutilated
and disfigured for life, but the boa of the
country, the Giboa, or boa constrictor.
The great serpent is left at laro in many
of the stores and warehouses and in sev
eral of Jhe residences. During the day
it coils ftself in the cellar into the like
ness of a section of hawser in the hold
of a vessel ; or lies in the store-room be
hind the bales and boxes in the simili
tude of a discarded v-pipe, or it
loops itself , among the grinders and
rafters of the garret into the semblance
of a Brobdignaggian Bologna sausage
hung up to dry; as harmless as the usual
serpent of monstrous size depicted in
glowing colors on the swinging sign of
canvas at the door of the side-show to a
traveling circus in the United States,
i At night, however, when all good peo-
Ele of the city are suspended in their
ammocks, the ratter awakes and takes
possession of the building from the foun
dation to the roof-tree, and the ease
and expedition with which the legless
incarnation of longitude goes up and down
the stairs, and under, around, and about
the chairs and tables, in the pursuit ot
rats and mice and such small deer, is
something marvelous for the bats and
bombyxes and other night-seeis and lly
ers to behold I imagine, from all I have
heard. Presumably, many a time and
oft, the head of a family, in getting out
of- his hammock, steps upon the cool
body of his rat-catcher to shudder in the
instant of his misapprehension that it is
the corpse of one of his numerous
progeny.that has succumbed in the night
to one of the myriad diseases incident to
childhood and Para, and tumbled out on
the floor.
Presumably, also, now and then, the
chif clerk, returning lat from tb Hub
ano. stiiggenng up to his swinging ?"id
verv uncertain couch and falling across
it, gets his .sprawling hands against the
very Substance of the serpent in his de
lirium to convince him of the error of
his ways at once and work a reforma
tion in his habits in the course of time.
Presumably, also, occasionally, during a
dearth of rats and mice, a iiieniber of
the family disappears mysteriously,
leaving nothing behind him out of which
a surmise or the smallest quantity of
soothing syrup can be sucked by the sur
vivors, except his hat and other noon
day apparel. But I have not heard of
the occurrence of any such accident in
reality, and the serjK-nt may be set down
in troth as a remedy for rats as safe as
any in use in any other part of the
world, except China, where the ieople
are their, -own rat-eat fhf-rs every man
for himself and the devil take the hind
most: and where, to make assurance
doubly sure and take a bond on fate,
John Chinaman, afler killing a rat, cooks
and oats it.
But after all, when it is considered the
grand role the serpent has played in
many of the religions of the globe, re
ceiving divine honors in more than one
country at the hands of untold millions,
it is rough on one of the most magnifi
cent species the world . has ever seen to
take it down from the temple of worship
and put it to catching rats in a ware
house. But this is an iconoclastic age;
and the serpent is not the only god that
has succumbed to Mammon.
(Germany's Peaaaut Proprietors.
Chicago News.
Peasant proprietorship does not work
very well iu Germany, notwithstanding
Bismarck's policy of restricting agricul
tural imports, especially from America,
by every conceivable means. Every
where the debts of the peasantry are
said to be increasing at an alarming
rate; simulators are buying their land,
and thus forming large estates which
they manage on purely economical and
and commercial principles.
The reason is descrited as follows:
A proprietor who has five sons must
either leave his land to one or divide it
among them. In the latter case the land
in the course of a few generations would
be parceled out into such little pieces as
would hardly repay the cost of cultiva
tion, far less support a family. In Ger
many, as a rule, the eldest or youngest
son inherits the estate, and pays his
brothers aud sisters a sum of money in
proportion to its estimated value. This
money is generally raised by mortgage,
and it is because of these mortgages,
that the land is generally falling into
into the hands of speculators and capi
talists. The impression is gaiuing
ground that no mere fiscal impositions of
the government , founded on protective
methods will be able to redress the
growing evils of the system. .
Curiomttles of Irrigation.
Chicago Tribune.
It is found by actual experience that
after land has been saturated by irriga
tion a few years it requires less water to
make a crop of any grain, corn included,
and this is an important factor in the
future of the water-supply, for it means
that more land can be brought under
cultivation than was first thought pos
sible. Another fact is that irrigated
land does not seem to wear out the
water acting as a perpetual manure and
renewing its fertility as fast as exhausted
by cropping. This is said to be the ex
perience of other countries, notably of
the Po valley of Italy, of southern
France and of Spain, where irrigation
has been practiced from time im
memorial. It is the same in Old and
New Mexico for two centuries. The
Saints in Utah find their irrigated land
unimpoverished after thirty or thirty
five years of constant cropping.
Chesapeake'! Frog.
Chicago Herald.
The tributaries of Chesapeake bay
alone contribute $100,000 worth of meat
to the frog market every year. They
are worth about 50 cents a dozen, and
men make good wages hunting them
with shot-guns. Sportsmen also seek
for them occasionally, using small rifles.
The ITIehdl Uniform.
The uniform worn by the troops of the
Mehdi consists of a white smock,, decor
ated with 'three colored squares in front.
It has loose sleeves and a fancy border
around the sleeves and neck.
Xevr York to English Kyex.
i Fortnightly Review.
The commercial capital of the United
States may now be fairly reckoned, for
size and population, the second city in
the world, if BrookPyn, New Jersey and
the suburbs be included within its
boundaries. Its property is assessed at
1,500,000,000, its foreign commerce is
not far from a $1,000,000,000, while its
domestic trade reaches many hundred
millions. But there is hardly a Euro
pean city of any importance which
is not infinitely its superior in
municipal administration, conven
ience, beauty and architectural
pretensions. With the . exception
of the postoffice and the unfinished
Catholic cathedral, which is neither in
size nor design a cathedral at all, there
is scarcely a building which repays a
visit. The city hall, which cost $10,
000,000 or 12,000,000, is certainly
worth inspection as an instance of what
swindling on a gigantic scale is able to
accomplish, as is the Brooklyn bridge,
which cost $17,000,000, or three times
the original estimate, and which was
further unnecessary, as a subway would
have been more convenient and have
cost much less.
Local taxation is crushingly heavy,
and so inequitably assessed that the
millionaires pay least and the poor most.
The paving of the streets is so rough
as to recall Belgrade or Petersburg;
the gas is as bad as the pavement, and
it is only in Broadway and portions of
Fifth avenue that an unsystematic use
of the electric light creates a brilliancy
which but heightens the contrast with
the gloom elsewhere. The Central
park, so called from being a magnifi
cent expanse of wilderness in the center
of nothing, is ill-kept and ragged, and
at night is unsafe for either sex. The
fares of hack-carriages are four to five
times as high as in London.
A Lawyer Htratesy.
"GathV Letter.
I had an interesting talk with two
old lawyers at Lebanon, Ohio, some
j time ao about the celebrated Kissane
t trial, it happened thirty years ago.
! Kissane was an educated fellow aud a
rogue. He came of a good family and
took to forging. He was tried for a
series of frauds, such as the destruction
of a steamboat on the Mississippi river
by iucendiarism. His associates, who
numbered eight or ten people, were in
dicted with him. The wives of these
prisoners all went to the court and
made an extraordinary scene at the con
clusion of the case.
There was a large array of counsel,
and the expedient was adopted by the
late Thomas Kwing of not answering
the speech of the counsel who opened
the case for the govenment. This very
seldom happens in any trial, 'the gen
eral proceeding is for the case to be
opened for the prosecution, and then a
reply made for the defense, and then
the government puts forward its best
man to make the concluding argument.
At Mr. l-lwing's suggestion the first
speech for the prosecution was not an
swered at all. The lawyers went on
taking notes as if they had meant to
make a formidable argument. The
government had not stated its whole
case. 'iSiey had designed to press the
evidence home in the second speech.
To the astonishment of everybody the
defense made no reply, and conse
quently the case had to go to the jury.
When the defendants were acquitted
their wives rushed upon them in the
dock, and the whole court was turned
into screaming, w eeping and shouting,
and nobody could stop it.
lie Oepenrted on a "Valler los."
Texas Siftinss.
Rooney owns the ugliest yellow dog
in Austin. His friends often joked him
about the brute, and suggested that he
should drown him or choke him to
death with butter. But Rooney would
w ink and say, "Niver you moind ; that's
the saj-gaciousest pup in Texas."
After many a wild debate at a ward
meeting Rooney has staggered home
followed by his faithful dog. It was
his custom to cautiously open the door
and send his yellow dog in as an ad
vance guard. If the pup came back
hurriedly, accompanied by a howl, and
a poker or a sauce-pan, Rooney retreated
and slept in the wood-shed. On account
of these services Rooney became much
attached to his dog.
The poet has said, "There's nothing
true but heaven." One night Rooney
came home after an animated discussion
with some of his countrymen as to the
expediency of using dynamite "to in
timidate the toy rants." He approached
the door cautiously, listened at the key
hole, and then whispered, as he opened
the door, "In wid yez."
The dog thrust his tail between his
legs and sneaked in. A dead silence of
several minutes followed. Then Rooney
soliloquized, "It's a'slape she is, I'm
thinkin," and he entered. -
Next morning when he met his friend
Mulcahy, the latter said :
"Man alive, Rooney, did ye fall off
the scaffold. Ye look all broke up. How
did ye get that face anyhow?'-'
"I got it," said Rooney, sadly. "I
got it Mulcahy, my frind, by puttin' me
depindence in the saggaciousness av a
contimptible yaller dog."
Nellie Was Xot Poor.
Friendly Visitor. 1
Little Nellie Long had lost her
father and her mother was poor. Her
sweet temper and winning ways gained
her many friends. Among them was
an excellent lady, Miss Norton. A
glimpse of Nellie's bright face peeping
in at the door always brought a smile
of peculiar tenderness over Miss Nor
ton's placid features.
She loved to sit by the child softly
stroking her hair, and while looking
into her smiling eyes, would often eay :
"Poor, poor Nellie I" j
When Nellie shook her head, with I a
heart too happy to forbode evil, her
friend wonll caress her still more
fondly, and then say: "Poor little
Nellie I" !
The child's heart seemed troubled by
these pitying words, for she asked one
day, "Why do you call me poor? Please
don't, Miss Norton. I'm not poor
why, I've got 25 cents and a good
mother!"
An Englishman offers a prize of
$5,000 to any one who will concoct some
drink to take the place of beer.
HOW SOAP IS MADE
When II ! .Tlaiiufae lured ou a Large
Krale.
Chicago Tribune Interview.
"There is great competition among
soap manufacturers, as there is in t'le
production of all staple articles," re
market! a leading soap-maker recently
in a conversation with a reporter, "and
there is consequently very little profit in
soap-making. There is, in fact, no money
in it unless the stuff is made in enormous
quantities. It is, nevertheless, a trade
that is gradually increasing. Formerly
nearly every family, aspecially among
the fanners, made its own soap for gen
eral housekeeping purposes, but that is
no longer the case."
In the course of further conversation
the manufacturer said: ''Nearly every
practical soapmaker looks upon the de
tails of soapmaking as a secret. Here is
a published work on the subject, but, as
you see. it is locked, and no one has ac
cess to it but its owner. The real secret,
however, is the filling that . is used in
order to make the soap heavy and thus
realize big profits. Now, any filling is,
of course, an adulteration, and these
adulterations frequently consist, among
other things, of common starch, pow
dered alabaster, pulverized lime, gyp
sum, and iiK!-clay. The basis of first
class goods are refined tallow, or, more
properly speaking, stearine, vegetable
oils, caustic soda, and rosin, the residuum
of the distillation of rough turpeniine.
The stearine and the oil, both of which
we make ourselves, are weighed off in
the proper quantities to make a batch of
;oap, are then pumped into a kettle capa
ble of bending from 30,000 to 60,000
pound.-. Open steam is introduced by
means Of a pipe which leads to a circu
lar perforated ring at the bottom of the
kettle, and the contents are brought
to a lKiling jxjint. A fixed pro
portion of a certain degree of strenghtof
caustic lye, made from soda, which is
obtained from England aud shipped in
iiir-tiglit sheet-iron drums, is iheu
added. Thi- causs the fatly substances
to .vMpoinry. as u is u clinically ealled
that is, i: converts them into soap.
"Water is next added, after which a
quantity of salt is thrown into the ket
tle, the effect of which is to separate the
water not absorbed by thesoup from it.
The curds of soap float on the top f the
kettle, while the excess or water sinks to
the lxtttoui and carries all impurities
with it. A certain jiercentage of resin,
according to the quality .of the soap to
be made, is dissolved in a large pan, and
added to the cntiteirs of the kettle, which
is again boiled up. Sufficient lye is now
Used to form a ierl'ect soap. After this
is done more salt is used iu order to
deane the reiu thoroughly. The kettle
is now allowed to stand for two or three
days, at the end of which time the water
at the bottom ts drawn off. and the soup
is then given what is called a"w ashing
chairgc This is done by adding water
and a little lye. aud 'opening the mass
with sail. The water is then run oil and
a str.-ngtlitening change" is given td the
soap. This is done with a strong alkali,
ami the boiling is continued for several
hours hi order that the soap may become
thoroughly saturated. The excess of lye
settles m the I ot torn.
"The effect of all these 'changes' is the
removal of whatever impurities may be
in the materials used. To make the soap
perfectly neutral it is given a 'settling
change.1 This is accomplished by run
ning in water sufficient to brings it into
a siruppy condition, when it has a semi
transparent apiiearancc, looking more
like honey than anything else. The soap
is now allowed to settle two or three
days, according to the weather. This
set t ling process answers a two-fold pur
jiose. The soap being 'finished (the
technical term) the kettle is covered up,
and the 'nigee,' a technical term for the
impurities, is allowed to settle or pre
cipitate at the bottom, while the soap
cools off until the temperature falls to
1C0 Fahrenheit, when it is reidy to
frame." .
Pli-ketl'M Division' at Ciettf bur.
Exchange.
The Confederates, out of fi8,000 men
engaged at t'ettysburg, lost 18.000, but
Meade held his hand from interfering
with their orderly retreat. Of that bat
tle the climax was the assault of Pick
ett's division, "the flower of Virginia,"
against Webb's front on the left of Ceme
tery hill. Before the heroic Armitage
called for the "cold steel" and carried
Gibbon's battery with a rush, the
division had met with a variety of ex
periences during its mile-and-a-half ad
vance over the smooth ground up the
crest. "When it first came insight
it hail been plied with solid shot ; then
half way acro.-; it had U-cn vigorously
shelled," ami the double canister had
been reserved for its nearer appoach.
An enfilading fire tore through its ranks;
the musketry blazed forth with deadly
effect." This is the evidence of an eye
witness on the opjiosite side, who adds,
"but it came on magnificently." Yes it
came oti to cold steel and clubbed mus
kets, and, after a desperate struggle, it
went back foiled, to the accompaniments
which marked its advance. But, heavy
as were its losses, it was not "annihi
lated." Pickett's division survived to
be once and again a thorn iu the Fed
eral side liefore the final day of fate came
to it at Appomattox Court House.
Sorghum vn. Heel .Sugar.
Atlanta Constitution.
The beet sugar industry lnis received
many serious checks in this country, but
it undoubtedly has a future before it.
At present only two beet sugar factories
are in operation in North America. One
of these is at West Farnhain, in Canada,
and the other is located at San Francisco.
The production of sugar from the sugar
beet has one great advantage over sorg
hum. . In the latter not only is the sea
son of growth to be considered, but what
is of more importance, the season of man
ufacture. Sugar manufacture from beets
can lie continued all through tho winter.
The Migar beet contains only one kind
of sugar, viz: sucrose. The amount of
glucose in the healthy, rijK) beet is so
small as to lie practically unappreciablo.
In the sorghum, on the other hand, the
percentage of glucose, or uncrystalized
sugar, is often so great as to unfit it for
sugar-making.
Dos Cheap.
Twenty-four greyhounds, of a choice
breed, were recently sold in England for
upwards of 7,650, which they say was
dog choao.
ICngllsh Opinion ol American Beaatr.
Hir Lepel OrlfflnB Book.
Americans hornwtlv believe their women
to lie the most beautiful In the world; nor
to them would there appear any extrava
gance in the remark of The New York
Sun on the audience which attended
Irving's first performance, "in respect of
the lx-anty it contained far surpassing any
audience that Mr. Irving ever bowed to in
his life. " But the opinion of foreigners
1 do not speak of Englishmen alone U
very different, aud 1 have never met one
who bad iivtil long or traveled much in
America who did not hold that female
beauty in the ctnti-a is extremely rare.
while tho average of ordinary good looks
is unusually low. More pretty faces are
lo lie aeon in a single day in Ivondon than
in a month in the states. The average of
tieauty is far higher in Canada, and thn
American town in which most pretty
women are noticeable J Jetroit. on the
Canadian border and containing many Cau-.
adian residents. In the western state
beauty is conspicuous by its absence, and
in the eastern towns, Baltimore, Philadel
phia, New York and Boston, it is to bts
chiefly found.
In New York, in August, I hardly saw
a lace which could be calloa pretty, so
ciety was out of town, but an estimate of
national beauty is best formed by a study
of the faces of the people, and the races at
Monmouth park had collected whatever ol
beauty or fashion had been left in the city.
Even at Saratoga the moat attractive face
seemed that of a young English, lady pass-
ing through on her way to Australia. In
November New ork presented a dixier-
ent appearance, and many pretty women
were lo be seen, although the number was
comparatively small, and at the Metropoli
tan Opera house even American friends
were unable to point out any lady whom
they could call beautiful. A distinguished
artist told me that -when he first visited
America he scarcely saw in the streets of
New York a single face which he could
select as a model, though he could find
twenty such iu the London street in whioh
his studio was situated.
The Raphael XI at.
New York Hun.
44 A man can't succeed In rur profesKlou
unless he keep posted iu wieiice, " ob
served a route-can ier. nhe toyed with his
heavy watch chain. "1 retu one day tbat
nitric and muriatic- acids mixed would
bleitch hair a heau'iiul straw color. 1
went to the nearest druggist and found out
what those things cot. 1 put an adver
tisement in a good many country papers,
about an follows:
' Beware of oiouous hair dyes, contaiu
iug lead, Mlver, bismuth or mercury.
These ruin the oalp. and may dostroy
health and life. Try Dr. Gomad's Golden
Balm. One application will produce the
Raphael golden tint. For sale at all
druggists, or 1112 Broadway. Price, $2.50
a bottle.
"That had just euough science to catch.
I sold more than 1,000 bottles of it, and it
cost me 3 cents a bottle to get h up. While
business lasted it was a bonanza. There
must have been 8.000 or 4.000 new blondes
around the country.
Why did you give it up?"
" Well, you see U did blench the hair to
a gorgeoHj blonde, but in two weeks the
hair came Out and left the women's head
like liillranfyjaill And their hufchauds
aud fathers came on to look for me, and it
wasu't very healthy to be found about that
time, aud so I quit. It was a good thing
for the wig-makers, however. "
A nitiak flarelr RIade.
Boxtou Transcript
YouDg lawyer (much elated) Mr.
Coke, congratulate me. You know I told
vou I had a casr. Well, fir, I've won il.
Yes, sir, actually won my first case.
Coke (an old fawyer) You're excusable
under the c ircumstance., but with a little
experience you may yet do honor to your
profession.
Young lawyer Excusable under the
circumstances! I don't understand your
meaning, Mr. Coke.
Mr. Coke Don't understand! Listen:
If you had been a lawyer of experience
you would have lost that case; then you
would advise your client to appeal, and if
skillfully managed it might have been made
to last for years, or at least as long as he
had any money. But you have won, and
that's the end of it. Let it be a lesson to
you in the future.
A Freak, by Jove
Shelby (N. C.) Argus.
On Sunday afternoon the storm raged
furiously oud heaven's artillery flashed,
often to the consternation of many a
woman. After the storm had ceased
Arcby I'obcrtN, colored, went to the
stables to feed his mule. He saw the mule'
standiug on its fore feet and resting on its
haunches, as if iu the act of rifaing, aud
said: ,-BIll, get up. " but Bill listened not
to his words. Supposing the mule was .
too lazy to riM he tJiook Bill's head, but
there was no movement on Bill's part.
Then the lail was twisted in vain Bill
was dead. 1 he lightning had killed the
mule in the act of rising, and there, statue
like, it stood on its fore feet. BUI has
plowed his last furrow and now sorrow
sits with poor Archy.
Gone on the Orchid Question.
Chicago llerald.
The display of orchids at the.great hor
ticultural show at Paris, and the fashion
able flutter round the curious flowers, has
revived a story of a certain English noble
man "gone" on the orchid question, it
seems that a wonderful specimen of the
Jlant was exhibited in a shop on the Quai
e la Megisserie. This gentleman wuked
in, got the history of the plant from th
owner, learned how it had oeen discovered
in Mexico, that it was the only one known
in Europe, and valued at 500 francs. My
lord threw down a note for the amount,
laid the orchid on the ground, and, crush
ing it w ith his heel, tola the indignant im
porter that now no ono should boast of a
rarer plant than he himself possessed.
IV ew Orleans Architecture.
Chicago Herald.
New Orleans, a semi-tropical city, in
stead of adopting a style of architecture
suited to the climatic conditions prevalent
there, imitates the methods of higher lati
tudes; resort to architectural forms which,
however beautiful in themselves, are ut
terly unsuited in the place.- The Times
Democrat calls this an endeavor to "en
graft upon the stock of the equator the
firoduct of the arctics, " and wishes a re
ormatlon. -
Obituary.
"He was made a real estate owner under
the weeping willow in the lot adjoining"
is the expressive way of chronicling a sud
den death iu Arizona.
Arkansaw Traveler: All de eddlcation In
de worl' won't make some men wise. AH
de co'n in de crib won't fatten do siumj
suckin' hoss.
Joaouin Miller: Better la a hearty wf-'-oome
from tba poorest dog than a douhuul
recaption from a king in purple.