Bandon recorder., March 17, 1910, Image 3

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• ■•«pin* with Fv«S Raias«.
THE HIGHEST PRICES
Among the pemictou* tMngs that
we hav* all been doing without know­
ing it Is sleeping with a pillow under
our heads. No longer if we value
health and happiness may we bury
our weary heads I* these soft and
soothing depths. It Is the feet that
want elevation, not the head, says a
German doctor, and a pillow Isn't big
enough to raise them to the required
height. The doctor has the foot end
of his bed elevated about eight inches
and says that In this position his cir­
culation is betteg and that his brain
and nerves have profited thereby.
— ....
" -w
,
ever offered in the City of Port­
land are as follows: We will ¡my
these prices—straight up for
good, fat stuff. We never charge
commission nor drayage.
Fresh ranch eggs-market price.-
Dressed Veal up to 130 Ito 12Jc
Large Veal Less.
11c
Dressed pork, any size....
!8c
Live Hens.............................
10c
Dressed Hens......................
18c
Live Ducks..........................
16c
Dressed Geese.....................
25c
Dressed Turkeys.................
AdUrew.
FRANK L SMITH MEAT CO
“Ficklto ih« Beef Trut.”
PORTLAND. OREGON.
Dolphin
and
Flying
|
Flab.
A ship was lying at anchor at Boca
Grande, says the Punta Gorda Herald,
lately when the crew observed a dol­
phin chasing a flying fish, both coming
directly toward the ship. On nearing
the vessel the flier arose in the air
and passed over the bow just abaft
the foremast. As it did so the dolphin
went under the ship and, coming up
on the other side, sprang from the
water and caught the flying fish on
"the fly” just as it was curving grace­
fully down in Its descent to the water.
l.ookln* Forward.
"Why are you looking so happy?”
“My rich uncle has bought him an
ieroplane."
"But Curtis says an aeroplane is as
Mfe as an automobile.”
“And I believe it; that’s why I’m 80
lappy.”—Houston Post.
I in poowl ble.
Nothing
Inquirer—What do you suppose will
happen when the world’s supply of
India rubber is exhausted?
Information
Editor—Providentially
some chemist in the employ of the
Standard Oil Company will discover a
process for making a good substitute
out of petroleum.
DYSPEPSIA
“Having taken your wonderful 'Casca-
rets’ for three months at.d being entirely
cured of stomach catarrh and dyspepsia,
I think a word of praise Is due to
•Cascarets' for their wonderful composi­
tion. I have takeu numerous other so-
called remedies but without avail, and I
find that Cascarets relieve more in a day
than all the others I have taken would in
• year.’*
James McGune,
CUT THIS OUT. mail it with your ad-
dreaM to the Sterling Remedy Company,
Chicago. III., and rec ive a handaome sou­
venir Gold Bon Bon FREE.
The confidence felt by farmers and
gardeners in Terry’s Seeds to-day
would have been Impossible to feel in
any seeds two sec w» f year*
ago. We have made a
science of seed
growing.
always di
exactly what you
expect of them. Fors '.e
everywhere. FLRUY’S 1310 SEED
ANNUM. Free on request
p. M. FERRY a CO., Detroit Mloh
- -- ------------------------- !
SUICIDE OF 8NAHS3.
««■*—«<*,
----■** UfevM
----- "
tasrploiis, QeMtlpe.l«« 1st-
ass* *• Their Over« 4 enum.
Famoo.
EXPERI
DENTISTRY
At Prices that Defy Competition
IEEFH WITHOUT PLATES A SPECIALTY
PA1NIJ-XS EXTRACTION
..XJ.50<
SILVER FILLINGS ..........
..SOc up
GOLD FILLINGS
............
$1.00 up
S2K GOLD CROWN..............................................$9.00
GOOD RUBBER BLATE ............................... *5.00
THE BEST RUBBER PI.ATIS ....................$8.00
WHALEHONE PLATES ........................... $10.00
Out-of-town patient« can obtain perfect work
and save money by catling at our office.
NO STU DEN rS
NO GAS
NO COCAINE
All work guaranteed for ten year*
CHICAGO PAINLESS DENTISTS
323Mi Washington St.. Cor. Sixth
KatablUhed IS year«
Hera to Rtav
A LEADER
WATER SYSTEM
IN YOUR HOME
Means an unfailing water supply. It
means that you will have the most practi­
cal Domestic water supply system now in
use No elevated tank, no frozen pipes in
winter, no stagnant water in summer, no
water supply troubles of any sort. Tank
placed in basement out of sifrht and way
made of pressed steel, will not rust and
will last a lifetime.
You will be pleased
the LEADER
system of furnishing Domestic Water
Supi ’y. A*k for our eataloeue and free
booklet. “How I Solved My Water 'wpply
Problem **
LEWIS & STAVER CO.
Portland, Ore.
Spokane, Wash.
Boise, Idaho.
Saps
are entirely free from it.
It may develop so slowly *■ to cans*
little if any disturbance during the «hole
period of childhood.
It may then pr -luci» <lysj>epsia, ca­
tarrh, and marked tendency to con­
sumption, before causing eruptions,
•ores or swellings.
To get entirely rid of it take the great
blood-puritier,
Is lte«nlt of Phy «teal Coadltloaa.
soon!")
So they lingered there, waiting, wait­
ing.
For the total eclipse of the moon
DR. MARTEL S FEMALE FlLLS.
Serofula
Wasa**a*a
The venoms of serpents, fishes, scor­
Sir Lauder Brunton, the famous
pions, centipede*, spiders, bees, etc., ; English physician, says that weariness
as well as the blood of the eel, owe is the result of physical conditions
their virulence of the presence of tox­ and the chronically tired are not al
ins similar to those which are secreted ways lazy.
tn bacteria. In both cases the toxins
One constantly hears the complaint
are specific products of the activity of | from patients," writes Sir Lauder
living cells. They are very poisonous, I "that they are 'always tired.' Othei
non-crystallizable colloids, of unknown people term them simply lazy, but ii
chemical constitution. The venom tox­ is quite possible that In many of these
ins are very sensitive to the action of caseb there Is some physical condition
beat and light, are easily destroyed by in the person which renders exertion
digestive
ferments, and consequently I specially distasteful to them, although
Mother* win find Mr*. Winslow”* Soothing
Syrup the b-st remedy to use to* thalr chlklrea are innocuous when swallowed. There I other people cannot observe It."
during the teething period.
is a great variety of these toxins, each
Sir Lauder Illustrates his point by a
of which exerts a specific action in story of an eminent medical professor
No* 1« Ik« Thuaderboll.
"I sent you a communication a day the nervous system, the red or the who, while acknowledged to possess
brilliant abilities, was accused by his
or two ago,' said the Indignant caller, white blood corpuscles, etc.
It Is possible to produce in any ani­ friends of being lazy. He died at ar
“and you wouldn’t print it just because
It didn’t happen to agree with your mal an artificial condition of immun­ early age of heart disease, and hli
views.”
ity to the effects of any animal venom friends were then willing to admit thal
"What was it about?” asked the edl
This is accomplished by the repeated there was some excuse for his laziness
tor of the Morning Thunderbolt.
In discussing the relation between
injection of the venom In doses, each
“It was about woman suffrage.”
of which Is too small to cause death. mental and physical fatigue Sir Lau
"O, yes, I remember."
Brunton makes the striking
"You threw it in the waste basket, i After a larger or smaller number of der
presume.”
Injections the animal acquires the pow­ declaration that “it is a mistake to re
"I presume I did."
er to resist the action of many times gard muscular fatigue as a stimulus
"My object, sir. was to show that I the quantity
of venom that would to the brain, or mental fatigue as a
good deal can be said on both sides,”
stimulus to the muscles. Long-con
"Well, you said it, all right, sir—on suffice to cause death. If It were inject­
tlnued muscular exertion renders th«
ed
Into
the
veins
of
a
non-immunized
both sides of the sheet. That’s the
This fact he lllus
reason why you can't say it ln the animal. The blood of the immunized brain anaemic."
Thunderbolt. Good morning, sir."
animal now contains a new substance, trated by the following story:
“Many yearB ago 1 used to write for
an antitoxin which has the property
Precocious ForeMlght.
of neutralizing the toxin of the venom, I a medical periodical. On returning
"Tommy,” said the teacher, “you
and this blood (or rather Its watery home one night after a very heavy
have made some inexcusable mistakes part, or serum) may be employed to day’s work at the hospital and feeling
in your geography lesson.”
combat the toxic action of the venom completely exhausted I found a not«
"Yes’nj,” said the precocious youth.
from the editor, ’Please let me have
in a non-immunized animal.
“When I’m a man I’m going to be an
The Ichneumon, the hedgehog and an article on such and-such a subjec!
explorer. I want to avoid the minute
some other animals which devour ve­ to-night.’ I sat down with pen and
accuracy which will lead people to dis­
nomous
serpents, exhibit an extraordi­ paper, but not a word could I write
credit my observations.”
nary resistance to the effect of their Thon I lay back lazily and began tc
bites. This natural immunity is ex­ speculate as to the cause of my want
PlltS CURFD IN 6 TO 14 DAVS
PAZO OINIMtNT is guaranteed to cure any case plained by the presence of antloxins in of Ideas. I thought: ‘The brain is the
of Itching. Blind, Bleeding or Protruding Pile* in
the blood of these animals. Serpents same as it was yesterday, but yester­
6 to 14 days or money refunded.
tOc.
are also little affected by their own day I was not tired; perhaps it is the
Gratitud
venom. In general, it Is almost im­ feebler circulation that prevents the
"Hello!”
possible to kill a venomous animal by brain from acting. If the blood does
"Hello!”
Inoculating it with the venom of Its not go up to the brain, I may bring
"Is that the grocery and meat mt
own
species, of which It can support the brain down to the blood.’ I, there
ket?"
fore, placed my head flat on the table
very large doses with Impunity.
"Yes.”
looking
sideways at the paper, and be
These
facts
demonstrate
the
absurd
­
"This is Mrs. Kildeer. You have my
gan
to
write
easily. On raising my
order for an sight-pound turkey. ity of the stories of rattlesnakes and
haven’t you?”
scorpions committing suicide by means head again every idea fled, so I placed
"Yes, ma’am.”
of their own venom. It is asserted my head again down on the table, and
"Well, change it to a slxteen-pound
that a scorpion or a rattlesnake im­ finished the article in that position.
turkey. I've just got my divorce pa­
"A similar Instance was afforded by
prisoned in a circle of red-hot coals
pers!”
the
practice of the late W. O. Lecky,
will sting or bite itself to death. This
Would Be Tai.cn Care Of.
Is a physiological Impossibility.—Cos­ the historian. He had a large magni­
ficent head, mounted upon a long neck
“I fear I am not worthy of you."
mos.
and a willowy body. He found out
"Never mind about that," responded
that his circulation was not sufficiently
the young lady with the square jaw.
THE ORIGINAL TRIPLANE.
"Between mother and myself we can
strong to raise the blood to his brain
effect the necessary improvements.”— Flyinsr Machine Built by Mrlnvfel- I |n gUfflclent quantity for its funda-
Louisville Courier-Journal.
low in i8«N.
mental activity in the upright position.
The Aeronautical Society of Great For thla reason be wrote his history
Only One “BROMO QUININE"
in whl)e kneellug on a sofa which had a
That Is LAXATIVE BROMO QUININE. Ixx>k Britain announced an exhibition
for the signature of E. W. Grove.
Used the 1868, and offered various prizes, which I [arg0 broad head
Thla served him
25c
World over to Cure a Cold in One Day.
it was hoped, would create competition for a wrltlnR table, and in this kneel­
and result in the production of some lng po3ition he wrote all his works, the
Still at Her Own Disposal.
“Miss Violet,” said the handsome practical results with ftying machines. bIood baving thus to travel to his
young professor of vocal culture, "you Stringfellow added to the idea of Wen- brain ln a horizontal line, Instead of
must put more heart Into your voice. ham by placing three planes, one above upward against the force of gravity,
Let it be freer and more spontaneous.” the other. He also succeeded ln pro- ag
would have had to do ln the sit
"Why, professor," she said, bringing duclng a very light steam engine, and tlng position."
her lovely eyes to bear upon him. "my
The secret of being tired apparently
heart is entirely free!”
ties in the fact that the muscles when
Why»
in work give off poisons which bring
At the front gate, procrastinating—
on fatigue. Worry and sorrow are also
(“No, George, don’t go yet; ’tls too
given as causes of weariness.
Hood’s Sarsaparilla
In usual liquid form or in chocolated tablets
known as Sarsatabs. 100 doses $1.
Heard
Never
Negro
20
Paid
Note*
Years
After
“Yes.
Push her up to the side of
i ne tteusou
buy.
The Boy—Have yer caught any-
‘hing, sir?
The Angler—No, not yet, my lad.
The Boy—Ah, I thought not. There
weren’t no water in that pond till it
rained last night.—Leslie's Weekly.
fore our marriage?"
“Certainly.”
"Then you ought to have married
him.”
“That’s just what I did.”—Bon VI-
vant.
Trial Bottle Free By Mail
WE PAY CASH
For homestead relinquishments, and can sell your
farms and ranches quickly. Let u« handle your
business and we will guarantee y<>ur satisfaction.
Give full particulars in first letter.
DAV S & BUITKAMP
510 Dekum Bldg.
Portland, Ore. If yoa suffer from Epilepsy, Fits. Falling SickoeM,
SEEDS
J.
J.
Catalogue for
the Asking
Send for It.
B U T Z E R
188 Street Front
Spasm«, or have children that d<> «o, my New I)i*
covery will relievo them, and all yon are asked ta
do 1« to eeud fur a Free Tria if 2 Bottle of Dr. May*«
Epi leptlold«
Portland, Oregon Drt. W. H. MAY, 5<8 Pearl Street, New YorL
ainless Dentistry
Save the Baby^—Use
Out of town people
can haxo their plate
and bridge work tine
iohod in one day
bf necettwary.
necenvary.
W»
Wo will give
rive you e rood
22k fold or percolata
h.sd
crown for
TU BIST
Should be given at once when the
little one coughs. It heals the del­
icate throat and protects the lungs
from infection—guaranteed safe and
very palatable.
Molar Crowns
22k Bridge Teeth 3.50
Gold Filling«
1.00
Enamel Filling« 1.00
Silver Fillinft
• 5y
2.50
Inlay Filling
Good Rubber
Plates
5.00
Beet Red
7.50
P late *
Painlesa Extr don -.50
___
(
All Druggist*. 25 cents.
DH. W. A. Will, P mwwwt *«
a mas meniwce ia reanaM
WORK GUARANTIED FOR IS YEARS
Polnleas Extraction F roe to hei* plaice or bridge work
La ordered. Consultation Free, You cannot gat bettea
painleea work done any where. All work fully guar-
antoed. Modern electrio equipment. Beet methode.
Wise Dental Co.
F ailino U uilihmo __
T himd .^ axh S t *. PORTLAND, OREGON
COFFEEC
TEA SPICES
orrici M0U*«:
I Lit U ILS.
Suday*. * ta L
BAKING POWDER
w EXTRACTS
JUST RIGHT
C. GeeWo
CLOSSET a DEVERS
J
The Chinese Doctor
This wondeful man has
made a life study of the
{»ropertiea of Roots,
lerbs and Barks, and
is giving the world the
benefit of his services.
War.
No Mercury, Poisons
or Drugs Used. No
Operations or ( utting
Guarantees to curs Catarrh. Asthma, Lung.
Stomach and Kidney trouble«, and ail Privata
Disease« of M n and Women.
A SURE CANCER CURE
KOW-KURE
is not a “food”—it is a medicine, and the
only medicine in the world for cows on y.
Mad** for the cow and, as its name indicates,
a Cow Cure.
B« reneea. retainod aftep*
birth, abortion, scours, caked wider, and all
similar affections positive y and quickly
cured. No one who keeps cow-, whether
many or few, can afford to Is* without K< )W-
KU k E. It is made especially to keep cows
healthy. Our book “Cow Money’’ «ent FREE.
A>k your local dealer for KOW-KURE or send
to the manufacturers.
DAIRY ASSOCIATION CO.
Lyndonville. Vt.
Just received from Pekin, China safe, auro
and reliable. U..failing in its works.
If you cannot call, write for symptom blank
and circular. Inclose 4 cents in stamps.
CONSULTATION FREE
The C. Gee Wo Medicine Co.
162<-> Tirsl SI., cor. Morrison, Portland, Or.
P N U
No. 5-'10
HEN writing to advertisers please
mention this p«|i«r.
W
■■ ■
■
j
A flavoring used the ««me as lemon or vsnflla.
By dissolving granulated sugar in water and
adding Mapleine. a delH'ions syrup ia made and
a syrup better than maple. Mapleine ia sold by
grocers. If not send 35c for 2 ot. bottle and
recipe book. Crescent Mfg. Co., Seettle, Wa.
•*
1'
rof DISTEMPER
■ Z-IVil
and Catarrhal Fever
Sure cure and poMtlve preventive, no matter how horses at any ago
are infected or “expo<ed.” L quid, given on the tongue; acta on tha
B ood and Glands, expels the poisonous germs from the body. Cure» Dis­
temper in Dogg and Sheep and Cholera in Poultry. Largest Belling lira
Btock remedy. Curen 1 a Grippe among human beings «nd h a fina Kid­
ney remedy. 60c an<i fl a bottle; Stand S10 a dozen. Cut thia out. Keep
it. Show tn your druggist, who will get it for you. Free Booklet, “Dis­
temper. €au°ei and Cures.M Special agent* wanted.
When Yozz
Take Cold
SPOHN MEDICAL CO.,
GOSHEN, IND., U. S. A.
The RAYO LAMP 1» • high grade lamp <old st s low price.
There are lam;* that <v»t more but there i> no better lamp
st any prl< e. The Burner, the Wick, the Chimnev Holder —
•11 are vital ttilosi in a lamp; the»e part, of the RAYO
LAMP are f«rl< ctly condructed and there ia nothing
known in the «rt of lanitrmaklng that could add to tbs
value of t ie B a YO a« a llsht-flrTns device. Suitable for
any room in the hott»e.
Every dealer everywhere.
If not i t your*. Write for deicrlptlve circular to ths
neareat Agency of the
STEADY
VfMITl
M«HT
<
• ••
«
&
Our«'
It ha« cured thousand« where everything alee
failed. Guaranteed by May Medical Laboratoiy
Under Pure Food and Drugs Act, June 30th, 1001
Guaranty No. 1MD71. Please write for Specia 1 Frat
$2 Bottle and give A GW and complete add re»«
Seventeen Years the Standard.
’B*r*>
"■ —
<. taarlty«
will of the late Mrs. Franziska
Speyer, ■ widow of George Speyer, *
partner in the banking house of
Speyer 4 .Co., of New York. Ix>ndoa
and Frankfort-on-the-Maln, bequeaths
■ between 18,000,000 and $10.000.000 to
benevolent objects. The gifts include
$1,000,00# to the Frankfort Academy
of So< iai and Commercial Science and
$1,000,000 for the furtherance of th*
research into the subject of cancer
and lupus. Large sums are left to ■
lung list of institutions, among those
being societies for the aid of actors,
orchestra musicians, journalists and
artists. A fund Is set aside to be used
in pensioning employee in the bank*
of Speyer & Co. ln New York, Londoa
and Frankfort-on the-Maln.
Secarlna
Peter Morton, or “Old Pete,” a
colored man and a quaint character
PrMcribed and recommended for women’s ali­
of antebellum days, died at his home
AS EARLY ri.TINO MACHINE.
ments—a scientifically prtpnred remedy of proven
worth. Tha result from their use is quick and
in Geneva court recently, the Cincin­
permanent. For sale at all drug stores.
exhibited a model of the entire appara­ nati Enquirer says. He did not know
tus, experiments being made by run­ his exact age, which was about 80
Itaek In the Corridors of Time.
Plato had just dubbed Aristotle ths ning it along a wire, from which It oc­ years, and there Is probably no one
casionally lifted Itself. This appara­ now living who does. When asked
"Intellect” of his school.
"In fact," said Plato, “he comes pret­ tus received a prize from the Aeronau- about It he would say that he was "a
ty near being the Philander Knox of
tt.nid.u8!unl!e_!l0W a.,,en?Pt I right ‘smart ’’sized 7>oy“the“ye^r "thZ
my scholastic cabinet."
cd to proceed with the further develop­ stars fell and when Jenny Lind came
For, In the best educational circles tn ment of the apparatus, but failing
down the Ohio River.”
those days, It was considered better to
health and eyesight prevented, and he
"Old Pete,” since the close of the
be brainy than tc >e brawny.—Chica­
did little more.—Cassler's Magazine.
go Tribune.
Civil War, has at different times been
a family servant and man-of-all-work
Making Bure of the Architect.
Rheumatism and Neuralgia never
in many prominent families on the
Norman-Al
Oouar,
an
Arabian
king
could get along with Hamlins Wizard
hills,
and In Avondale, and varied hl9
Oil. Wizard Oil always drives them Aho reigned long, long ago at Hirah, j employment occasionally by doing
commanded
the
architect
Sennemar
to
away from the premises in short order.
build him a wondrous palace, This P°rter work in downtown stores. It
No Formalities.
the architect did, and when it was is related of him, and the story was
"You had a housewarming the oth­ done a single stone fastened the whole |
himself, that before the
er evening, Mrs. Guernsey? You didn't structure, and the colors of the walls Civil War he was the property of a
•ay a word about it to me!”
changed frequently during the day. Kentucky gambler, who went broke.
“O, it was quite impromptu and In­
and and "Pete” with all other chattels pos-
formal, Mrs. Jipes. The janitor turn­ The king was greatly pleased
upon
showered
all
kinds
of
rich
gifts
_ 8e8sed hy the gambler, had to be sold
ed on the heat."
the builder with the lavishness of orl-1 t0 pat18fy his creditors,
The figures of this country’s wheat ental kings.
But monarchs were
The officers of a bank ln Maysville,
crop indicate not only a larger horns treacherous in those old days, and It ^y.. who had taken a liking to the
consumption as a result of Increased
population, but also a larger consump­ occurred to the king that Sennemar ‘■olored man on account of his genial
might build a palace equal ln beauty 8°O(1 nature and strict honesty, offered
tion per capita.
or even superior for some rival ruler. t0 ^uy his freedom for him If he
The more he thought over it the more would execute his personal note ln
jealous he became until one day he the,r favor and make his payments
ordered the architect to be thrown uPon
according as he was able, until
from the top df the palace to make they were repaid. This he agreed to,
certain that no duplicate palace would hut with the close of the Civil War
be made. After this the king was satis- and the scattering of his friends far
fled that his palace was the only one, and wide, Pete fell into hard lines
and the Arabians regarded It as one from lack of a permanent home and
of the wonders of the world.
| steady employment, but he never for­
got his financial obligations to his
One way is to pay no attention
On the 5 taste Coach.
banker benefactors and he continued
to it; at least not until it de­
Driver—Oh, I say, this money don’t making his payments to them for
velops into pneumonia, or
<o here!
twenty years after the close of the
Passenger—Why not?
bronchitis, or pleurisy. An­
war until the debt was Anally paid.
“Because it's stage money.”
other way is to ask your doc­
Often
he was
-------------
..— told that the claim was
"Well, isn’t this a stage?”—' I onker» I out]awed and be couid not be legally
tor about Ayer’s Cherry Pec­
Statesman.
forced to pay it, but he invariably re-
toral. If he says, “ The best
plied
that hla benefactors had trusted
•«Sat« end Baae.”
thing for colds,” then take it.
him and no matter how long it took
“
Why,
”
asked
a
Missouri
newspapei,
Do as he says, anyway.
'does our State stand at the head in he would pay them back to the
cent
publish our formulas
raising mules?”
Wo banish alcohol
I
"Because,
”
said
an
Iowa
paper,
"that
m w ■oAlamaa
A Trrin* Tin**.
Wa urge you to
Is the only safe place to stand."—Jack
“Colonel,” asked the beautiful Ctrl,
•onauit your
O’Lan tern.
doctor
“when was the most trying moment of
your
lifer
When the bowels sre
constipated,
poi-
I
There
is
probably
nothing
shocks
a
are
sonous substances sre absorbed into the man worse than to hear that an old i “It was when I went to my wife’s
blood instead of beingdaily removed from acquaintance, a man about his own father for the purpose of asking him
J m . A°.nr..V anTi,niSnd.*?-
to th« P°°r “ouee. to 1st me have her. He was very deaf,
this danger, doctors slvay* iaquirs about
the condition of the bowea. Ayer*« Pili*, i The man who wears a gadded coat and I had to explain the matter be-
. fors twenty clerk*.”—Chicago Reoorfi-
—Maes u j . c. at «• oe.. mm *. Ukaar-*
• ta shoulder the responsibility
to
the road and telephone to the repair
Strong Winds and Sard Storms
cause granulation of the eyelids. PET­ shop.”—Washington Star.
TIT’S EYE SALVE soothes and
quickly relieves, 25c. Al) druggists or
Flrat One That Came.
Howard Bros., Buffalo, N. Y.
“Didn't some idiot propose to you be­
PORTLAND. ORE.
Freedom
ft.
of
Million«
The elderly customer, whose library
had been destroyed by tire, was trying
to replace some of the rare old books
that had vanished in smoke and flame.
llesourceful.
“Have you a copy of 'Watson’s Apol­
"So you run your own motor oar?"
ogy'?” he asked the salesman at the
“Certainly,” answered Mr. Chuggins.
book store.
"His ’Apology'?” said the salesman. "Would not think of trusting its del­
“Great Scott!
He hasn’t made any icate mechanism to a chauffeur.”
apology yet. He says every word he
"And you know what to do ln case
wrote about those Asquith women la
anything
goes wrong?"
true.”—Chicago Tribune.
“OLD PETR’’ IS DEAD.
Honest
MODERN
Pbysfelaa
I TA
o
Standard Oil Company