Bandon recorder., March 23, 1905, Image 2

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liANbUÄ REH»KW:i
THEMEXW AN LIZA KU
DELICIOJS EATING, HIS FLESH
LIKE
THAT OF CHICKEN.
4
Tale nt
the
■■unnu — The
< er lows
War
Tall
Till*
«>• th»
l,eeallai
Creature fcan tires a New Append-
aae Iu 1’liice of One Lout or Stolen.
*
Don’t let the suu go down ami leave
you emldttvred and unforgiving tow urd
th<w- you love. Yoiamay comfort your
aching heart and HtiU the little voice of
«insolence that whispers, “don’t de­
lay,” by making up your mind that
when morning comes you will make
atonement for the harsh words and
sarcastic remarks that have wound«!
the sensitive heart far deeper than you
will ever know, but when morning
comes, you delay a little longer, or
possibly by that time you feel that you
are tlie abus«i party and wait for some
advance on the part of those who, in
your own heart, you know you have
wronged and that you must look for
tlie transgressor at home, you put off
the matter until you are asham«! to
acknowledge your error; but that is
not the end of the matter by any
means, for this little thorn will con­
tinue to rankle, and there will come a
day when you would give a great deal
to blot it from your memory. It can­
not be—it is there to abide as long as
consciousness remains — that is your
punishment. There is another reason
why you should never put off"a duty of
this kind, for how do you know but
what liefore another day rolls round,
the death angel may have entered your
home and placed the seal of silence on
the lips that you would give worlds
then to hear them murmur, “ I forgive
you.” Don’t delay, have a clear con­
science when you lay your head on
your pillow at night. Don’t be afraid
to say all the kind and loving things
you can to those who are near and dear
to you. If you have their praises to
sing, don’t wait until the Js-arl has lieen
taken from the casket and all the kind
and loving thoughts fall on deaf ears,
and tlie love-light of appreciation has
gone out of their eyes. We are here
to-day, but we have no guarantee that
we will lie here to-morrow. Then don’t
|s>st|ione saying the kind and encour­
aging words, and doing the gracious
thoughtful little acts that make life
worth living. Some p«>ple w ill doubt­
less say you are too gushing und accuse
you of flattering people you are thrown
with, and yet they are the very parties
who withhold all the commendations
when it would be worth while to give
them and sing their praises loudest
over a coffin lid, and tell of the silent
sleeper’s many lovable traits and good
qualities. If anyone has any kind and
encouraging thoughts aud words for
me, I want them now to help lighten
my pathway. A handful of violets
with the sweet incense of love rising
from them is better uow than many
floral designs with the words “rest”
and “gone home,” etc., when death
has rung dow n the curtain.
neurly a year we rweiv«! no word.
Wliat a Hiuqteiixe ami anxiety we liv«l
through from day to day. <*ur letters
came back to us unopened. We tried
in vain to trace our boy and even ad­
vertised for news of him, but he iM'i
simply dropjwd out of sigbL One
night we had retired a little earlier
than usual w hen we were awaken«! by
a kniwk at tlie door, and my husband
went dowu stairs to investigate. 1
heard him finally taking somelsMiy
through the house and I called to see
what was the matter. “It's just a
tramp, mother. He ML- hungry and
cold and”— "I'll be right dowu and
make him a cup of coffee. Ask iiim if
lie knows anything about our Jim.”
Just then I caught the sound of his
voiee. It was weak ami tremulous,
but it was enough for me. 1 just sim-
ply flew down the stairs, " Jimmie,
my boy, Jimmie!” and the next mo-
ment I was holding the emaeiated
figure in thin and tatter«! clothes in
my arms. How we laugh«l and cri«i
over him by turns, and put him to Is-d
in his own cosy room, that was just as
he left it months before. He had had
a terrible experience. He had been
shanghai«! and carried off on a foreign
vessel, and they had alius«! him tie­
cause he was not strong enough to do
the work required of him. He deserted
the first opi>ortunity and had beaten
his way back to his old home, begging
for the little to keep him alive until he
could reach us. Oh, what a sad expe­
rience my boy had! One request he
made over and over again, was that I
would never refuse a tramp something
to eat. ‘I have been.on the verge of
starving many times, mother, and 1
have gone up to the door of a house
where 1 knew they had plenty and to
spare, and where the odor from the
kitchen of thedinneror breakfast cook­
ing made me all the more ravenous,
only to have the door slammed in my
face with some insulting remark. One
woman threw a pail of water over me.
1 never thought to have seen the day
when I would curse a woman, but 1 did
more than once, and my conscience
didn’t hurt me one bit afterwards, for
they were friends in disguise. You will
feed lots of them who are unworthy,
mother, liut better give to nine unde­
serving rather than let tlie tenth sutler.
F«sl them all—it won't hurt us one
bit.’ I promised, and I have faithfully
fulfilled the promise made to my dying
Iwy. He only lived six weeks after he
got home.’ ”
•My tale is of the tail of a lizard. We
bad steam«! anti rallroatletl many Lun-
dr«ls of utiles and at the end of civili­
zation hail started over a steep and
narrow trail with horses and pack
mules, finally finding ourselves en­
camped in a deep canyon or barranca
In west central Mexico.
Iguanas, great, black lizards, three
feet or more in length, were abundant
In the deep caves of the cliff, coming
out early In the morning to sun them­
selves and bobbing up and down as an
owl ducks bls head to get u better look
at us ns our Mexican cook started the
fire or stirred about the camp. Me
found them delicious eating. Though
tlie Mexican demurred at first, preju­
dice was soon cast aside. Their limbs
might tie black skinned and seal)' with­
out, but within all wan sweet, white
meat, like that of chickens aud frogs'
legs.
The Iguanas, which hud their bur­
rows in the ground, would climb up
each mornlug, up. up to the topmost
limbs of some trees, and there bask in
the sun. They had a most startling
way of descending, a headlong dive to
the underbrush or Into the water. As
twilight fell the sight of these great
black apparitions sprawling earthward
was most remarkable. If one of them
had ever struck us in Its descent our
Interest in this strange habit would
suddenly have become lessened.
Our usual method of procuring these
giant lizards for our larder was to
shoot them high above us, when they
would tumble headlong to our feet.
Sometimes we could approach close to
one when It was fast asleep In the
scorching beat of midday. Once I
seized a big fellow by the tail. I was
sorry a moment later, but as I did not
want to be beaten by a lizard I held
stoutly on. Never before had I taken
hold of such a steel spring. The crea­
ture curled and twisted and snapped
Its body about, the sharp scales hav­
ing anything but a pleasant feeling on
the palm of my hand. Suddenly some­
thing gave way, nnd 1 fell on my back,
while the Iguana shot off in the op­
posite direction Into a deep hollow
among the rocks. When I regained
my feet I found some nine Inches of
tall In my hand, almost one-third of
BRIEF REVIEW.
the entire animal.
Tills ls not an uucommon occurrence
among lizards, and the ability to part
Narrowing the Atlantic.
with so considerable a portion of their
If
one
is within seventy-five miles of
anatomy insures many au escape from
sea distance of one of the eleven points
what would otherwise be Inevitable
on tlie Atlantic Coast, and has been
death.
thoughtful enough to bring along a
Almost all animals with backbones
have a thick, pliable cushion of car­
wireless telegraph outfit, one may ad­
tilage between each of the bones In
vise the family what to have for dinner
their spinal column, which permits
when the ship arrives—which means,
them to bend and twist It with much
as H. C. Gauss points out iu an inter­
freedom. The backbone of the Iguana
esting article In the current Harper’s
ls at first all cartilage, and when the
1 heard a lady say the other day: “ I Weekly, that three hours of the fastest
hard cells of the bone begin to be de­
posit«! a deep, narrow wedge or crack have kept a strict account of all the steaming have virtually been elimina­
is left in each tall bone. This Is filled tramps I have fed within the last few ted, for purposes of communication,
with soft cartilage, so these bones are years, and it foots up in the neighbor­ and the Atlantic to that extent nar­
greatly weakened near their centers. hood of a thousand. I live in a district row«!. The new system which has
Instead of an accidental defect this Is where they are constantly passing and lieen devised for the regulation of wire­
nn all wise provision of nature, fore repassing, and they have me spotted, less telegraphy provides, in part, as
teeing that hawks, vagrant naturalists
for I never turn one of them away follows: A vessel wishing to com­
and other enemies may some day be
too quick for the reptile and will seize hungry. I don't give them money, municate with a coast wireless station
for that I haven’t to give, even if I will first ascertain that no other wire­
its tall before it can escape.
When this happens, as In my cnse, desired to, but they are never refused a less outfit is making use of tlie ether
the strain of the struggling creature’s cup of coffee and something to eat. I waves in that locality. After the ves­
body ls too great for the weak spots In suppose I am foolish and that I am sel has sent her messages, the station
its tall lames, anil one of these gives many times sadly duped and imposed w ill transmit any business it may have
way, with the result above narrated. upon; but I would rather be mistaken for her, in the following order: Gov­
The muscles, too, are arranged to aid many times over than to let one de­
ernment business; business concerning
this phenomenon. They are short nnd
serving man go hungry. My neigh­ tlie vessel; urgent private dispatches,
thick and conical Instead of running
tlie whole length of the tail, and, being bors don’t like to have me feed the limited; press dispatches; other dis-
only dovetail«! together, they readily tramps for they claim that it makes it patches.
give way. Only a few drops of bios! hard for them, for it brings such rafts
Trials of Flat-Dwellers.
escape; then the stump heals over, and of tramps through this part of the
before long a new tall lieglns to shoot country. There is one thing I can say
The flat-dweller in London has tribu­
out
for tlie tramping fraternity, however, lations that seem strange to those who
This, of course, contains no boues, they have never been insulting and we are accustomed to ajiartment life in
but instead n long, unjolnt«! rod of have never lost anything by their dep­
New York. He does not have to pay
cartilage exactly like the ancestral one
redations, while my neighlsirs, who such high rents as he would in New
which was present In the embryo Igu­
ana. Stranger still, the scales on this make a practice of never giving any­ Y'ork, but he has to pay for his own
new tall nre unlike those on the rest of thing to old or young, have lost many electric wiring or gas piping; his hot
the creature's body and actually may articles by their raids. No matter how and colii water, and Ills steam heat: lie
be like those of some bygone ancestor. feeble they are, sick or well, they know is required to pay a fee of Hl to his
In the smnller lizards. call«l geckos, lietter than to ask for a cup of coffee landlord’s solicitor for drawing up the
tills seems always to be the cnse.
and something to eat at her door. I lease, and liefore he can vacate his
When I closely examin«! the tall have never lost a chicken or a turkey apartment lie must handover at least
which the iguana had left In my hands and they roost far enough from the
£L><> to his landlord for redecorating
I saw that It was one of these "fraud"
house for them to be carried off' by the ami repairing. About all the landlord
tails and lind long ago supplanted the
original appendage, with which some dozen, and we would be none the supplies are tlie windowpanes, door­
other enemy, doubtless a feathered one, wiser; my neigldxirs sometimes have knobs and doorplates, kitchen dresser,
had absconded. Two new vertebrae or nightly raids made upon their isiultry a bath and as few cuplsiards as he |> oh -
tall bones had come off with the base yards. They Isiught a valuable watch­ sibly can—and nothing else. More­
of my pl«-e.
dog and he had a dose of poison ad­ over, it Ls impossible to rent a flat in
But the owner cares nothing for the minister«!, and tlie chickens, ducks the lietter part of London for less than
number or character of his new tails and turkeys disapjieared like magic. five years.
They serve him well, and he is content.
We don’t lock our doors at night and
It Is a curious fact that the tall making
Absentminded.
never feel tlie least particle afraid.
machinery In his backbone Is so active
They
put
everything
under
lock
ami
A
minister's
wife, a doctor’s wife and
that sometimes a double or even a
- • tl!j>!e-tal! wKl pash out at Use sitrnq--," kny, !»>’• thefedaces-attd aiv living iu a traveling man’s wife met one day re­
and when tbe original tall Is even only nightly and daily terror for fear of a cently and were talking alsuil the for­
slightly Injur«! at one side a tiny tall forbidden guest.
getfulness of their husbands. The
will often sprout out where It has no
minister’s wife thought her husliand
right to be.—C. William Beebe in New
"J wij.1 t.-jj you why I have -.melt a was the uioM: folgeiiui man living, tie­
' York Tribune.
sympathy for traiui«, ami you will not cause he would gotochurch and forget
wonder then that I can never turn a his notes, and no one could make out
A Diplomatic Reply.
deaf ear to their demand for something what he wits trying to preach about.
An eastern potentate once asked n to eat. We hail a son, one of the l>est
Tlie doctor’s wife thought her huslmnd
group of bls courtiers which they
boys that ever lived, and the pride of was the most forgetfui still, for he
thought the greater man, himself or
bls father. At first he could elicit EC our hearts. When he was nl«»ut eigh­ would often start out to see a patient
reply to so dangerous a question. At teen years of age he went into a decline, ami forget his medicine case, and travel
Inst a wily old courtier said. "Your fa- and the doctors ordered hint out into nine miles for nothing. ‘'Well,” said
ther, sire, for, though you are equal to the open air and advised him to tramp the travelling man's wife, “ my husband
your father In all other respec ts, in from place to place, living out of doors is-ats that. He came home the other
thin he is superior to you, that he had and never sleeping under a roof if he day and patted me on the cheek and
n greater son than any you have." He could avoid it. He expected to find said: “ I believe I have seen you lie-
was promoted on the spot.
something to do in the towns he would fore—what ls your name ? ”—Brown­
pass through to aid him in money mat­ wood Banner Bulletin.
Canse nnd Fffect.
The census bureau tells us that there ters. We were not in the comfortable
Plenty of Red Tape.
1« an overplus of women in the cities circumstances in those days that we
and a shortage In the rural districts. are now, and could not give him the
Before a recruit can be said to have
Merely In a desultory way it may be money, although that was one of the joined the British army his name must
mention«! that there are not so many laws the doctors laid down, he must be entered sixty-two times, and that of
■how windows In the country ns In the not be provided, with money for that
his superior officer twenty-nine times,
city —Cincinnati Tost.
might mean luxuries, all of which they tei the document required by the War
want«! to deprive him of. letters en­ Office.
He Knew.
couraging and cheerful came to us at
Father—But do you think you ran
The Ambid<*trous Society of Lon­
rfinke niy daughter happy? Suitor— first and we l>egan to build our hopes
Happy! Say. you should Just have on Jimmie coming home strong and don has been formed, with the object
s<«'u her when I proposed! - Brooklyn well and'sunburned from his out-door of fiwouraging people to use both hands
Life
experience. Then they stopi>ed and for with wptal facility.
CHOICE MISCELLANY NEW SHORT STORIES
Too lluril oa Hhi-uoiullf».
It wus a matter of course that tlie
doctors should come to regard con­
sumption us commuulcii.Tto aifJ it
would ml be surprising should they
seek tlie mierol.e of cold feet. But ft Is
going a little too far when they persist
in the assertion that rheumatism is in­
fectious. The great antiquity of this
malady is undoubted. yet it still re­
mains a st H'emlous and baffling mys­
tery. Now. as before the Christian
era. Its treatment is empirical and inef­
fectual. Of ,ij| the manifold affliction*
which restrain the hilarity of mankind
It ls tlie last about which the doctors
■hottld dogmatize. Their proper atti­
tude toward rheumatism is one of hu­
mility and awe.
It may be true, as the doctors uffirm,
that rheumatism ls "catching;” that a
person of blameless life may acquire
its seeds by consorting with a friend
or neighbor; but, considering their ap­
palling Ignorance of its causes, its na­
ture, the tissues It involves and Its
proper treatment they can show no
warrant for so distinct and alarming
an announcement. Surely It ls enough
•hat the rheumatic sufferer ls without
>pe of human aid. Is the victim of the
physician’s impotence and ls already
shunned by the timid as a center of
moral pestilence, without his being
proscribed as a source of physical In­
fection.—Philadelphia Public I.edger
.
Hu»
llr Heard Ike Mens.
Geuerai Spuuldiug, who bus Iwen at
the St.. Lon g fair representing the
treasury department as one of its s|>e-
clal akei.ts. has Just returned to Wash
Ingtou. He was formerly a mginber of
congress, having nerved two terms with
credit to himself and his district. Lat­
er on lie became assistant secretary of
i! e treuaury and while In that position
showed unusual knowledge of the tar­
iff laws. It wu while he was a special
agent of the treasury, located in the
city of Detroit, that he heard news af­
fecting ldmself in the most unexpected
manner.
Tlie congressional convention of the
district in which he happened to reside
became deadlocked. Twenty ballots
were taken without result. General
Spaulding, who was acquainted with
the rival candidates uud very much In­
terested In the outcome, paid several
visits to the newspaper offices for the
purpose of scanning the bulletins, but
Open Secret, nt Health.
What Is the secret of health and old
uge? Mr. Chamberlalt, as chancellor
of the University of Bnningham, has
just been assuring his medical students
that they may take lees, unoke at work
and at play and drink with impunity.
Students, as a rule, need to such assur­
ance, but the experience >f four other
aged and eminent politiciaas, published
on the same day, soinewhxt discounts
Mr. Chamberlain's belief In ices, smok­
ing and drinking.
Lord Avebury in the Young Man
frowns on the Highbury regimen and
counsels the open air, with little to eat
or drink. Mr. Frederic Harrison says,
"Touch not tobacco, spirits nor any un­
clean thing," and rise from every meal
with an appetite. Sir Algernon West
would seem to tolerate tobacco in mod­
eration, but "not on nn empty stom­
ach.” Mr. Justin McCarthy lays the
emphasis on steady and regular work,
with plenty of open air and physical
exercise. Here again Mr. Chamberlain,
whose only exercise is lighting big ci­ 5 o’clock In the evening came and still
gars, would, In his own favorite phrase, there was no result. The convention
“Join issue.”—London Chronicle.
was being held in Lansing, and the
latest
dispatch said that a night ses­
Farm Coming Back to Its Oivn.
Things on the farm are changing, sion might be necessary. The geuerai
and we already observe, If we watch went home to his dinner and on Ills
the barometer of social life, that there way down again stopped in at the
Is a tendency to get back to the coun­ newspaper office.
"Have you hoard anything from Lan­
try. Fifteen years ago, for Instance,
less than 50 per cent of the population sing?" he nsked the telegraph editor.
"Yes," was the reply. "Tlie deadlock
were moving countryward. In 1900
has been broken.”
the statistics show that "0 per cent
"Indeed. And who has been nomi­
were seeking out homes iu rural dis­
nated?”
tricts. and It is likely that the popula­
“Oh, I forget tlie name,” said the op­
tion now going away from the city
erator.
reaches 75 per cent. At last, with Solo­
"Would you mind looking?" asked
mon. they are discovering that "all Is
the general.
vanity" In the cities; that friendships
The man said lie had no objection to
are difficult; that neighbors don’t know this. and. going through a pile of dis­
the names one of the other; that noise, patches, lie finally discovered the right
dirt and confusion are there, and the one ami. looking up, said carelessly:
struggle to live Is at the desperate
"They've nominated an old fellow
stage all the time.
named General Spaulding.”
The telephone, the trolley line and
And that was how Spaulding got the
free rural mail delivery—these are mit­ news of his unanimous nomination,
igating the unsocial side of rural life, which resulted in bls election to the
and the beauty of nature is doing the house of representatives. — St. Louis
rest.—Opportu nity.
Globe-Democrat.
A Poem For Illa Tombatone.
In John Chase, Brewer has a unique
citizen. John is engaged in writing po­
etry which will be sold by him and the
proceeds go toward the purchase of a
suitable tombstone for himself. He
will be seventy-one years old In Janu­
ary and when not writing poetry is
generally sawing wood. In fact, Mr.
Chase calls himself the wood sawyer
and poet laureate of Brewer. John
thinks his poetry Is of sufficient merit
to warrant his having a tombstone
rather better than the average. His
latest poem is a death song which he
considers his masterpiece, lie hopes to
have the entire poem on one side of the
stone and his name, age and date of
death on the other. Meanwhile he re­
mains hearty and continues to saw
wood.—Lewiston (Me.) Journal.
Two Clever Blind Men.
A wonderful couple are the Barro
brothers, who live on Broad street, At­
lanta. Although they are both totally
blind and have been so afflicted since
birth, they are well educated and well
read. They are about twenty and twen­
ty-three years of age respectively. They
go arm In arm wherever they want to
go, without the aid of a guide or even
a walking cane. They are familiar with
the town and go about the streets,
dodging teams and street cars, and
never jostle against the!r fellow pedes­
trians. They frequently visit the post-
office and can go to any store In town
If given ordinary directions for finding
It. They are cheerful and get more out
of lift. than many wiiO nre ihore fortu­
nate.—Atlanta Constitution.
Oysters and Typhoid.
Gourmets In suspense may take com­
fort to their passion for oysters, ac­
cording to the London Globe. Their
harmlessness under almost every con­
ceivable condition has now received the
official Imprimatur of the French gov­
ernment. It Is now some time since
M. I’elletan as minister of marine dis­
patched Professor Glard of the Sor­
bonne and of the Academy of Sciences
on a rovfng commission to examine ev­
ery oyster bed on the French coast and
to go thoroughly into the question of
contagion from these shellfish.
M.
Glard's report. Just presented, is em­
phatic. ‘‘Oysters,” he saya, “cannot In
any case conVey typhoid fever.”
Luck? to n<- Allee.
Patient—Great Scott, doctor, that's an
awful bill for one week'« treatment!
Physician — My dear fellow, if you
knew what an interesting case yours
was and how strongly I was tempted
to let it go to a postmortem yon
wouldn't grumble at a bill three times
as big as this —Chicago Tribune.
The flattery of one's friends ls re­
quired as a dram to keep up one's spir­
its against the Injustice at one's ene­
mies.—Bulwer.
Deas«
Draiuatls Cllaias to as F'.eeiHiia Will
Coatest Case.
Without having actually seen them
you cuunot imagine bow dark soum
Japanese country villages remain, even
IB the brightest and hottest weather
In the neighlsirhood of Tokyo Itself
there are many villages of this kind
At a short distance from such a settle
meat you see no houses; nothing la via
ible but a dense grove of evergreen
trees.
The grove, which ls usually compos«!
of youug cedars and bamboos, serve»
to shelter the village from storms and
also to supply tluilav for various pur
|aa«es. So closely are the tree’s planted
that there ls no room to pass between
the trunks of them; they stand straight
as masts and mingle their crests so as
to form a roof that excludes the sun.
Each thatched cottage occupies a clear
apace In the plantation, the trees form
ing a fence about It double the height
of the building. Under the trees it is
always twilight, even at high noon, and
the houses, morning and evening, are
half in shadow. What makes the first
Impression of such a village almost dis
quieting ls not the transparent gloom,
which has a certain weird charm of its
own. but the stillness.
There may be fifty or a hundred
dwellings, but you See nobody and bear
no sound but the twitter of Invisible
birds, the occasional crowing of cocks
nnd the shrilling clcadae. Even the
cicadae find these groves too dim and
sing faintly. Being sun lovers, they
prefer the trees outside the village. I
forgot to say that you may sometimes
hear a viewless shuttle—chaka-ton.
chaku-ton-but that familiar sound In
the great green silence seems an elfish
happening. The reason of the hush ls
simply that the people are not at home.
All the adults have gone to the neigh­
boring fields, the women carrying their
babies on their backs, and most of the
children have gone to the nearest
school, perhaps not less than a mile
away.—Atlantic.
The conversation tarn«! Bn the mo
meutous effects of trifles at times
when they were least exp«t«l to have
any influence st all, and this reminded
Mr. Thotnpson of au eptBBde in bls
own practice as a lawyer.
"It was the moat exciting legal bat­
tle of my life,” be said, and every one
present begged him to tell It.
“A tlglit was going on for the pt*
session of a large fortune.” continued
be. while the others settled themselves
for the story. "A wayward son was
contesting the will of hla father, and
the case abounded in dramatic fea
tures. Charge aud counter charge were
frequent. The young man w^is explo­
sive. hot temi>ered and without char­
acter. How much Ids family hud suf­
fered through him uo one ever knew.
The youug rascul bad hoped to get bls
father’s vast fortune, and now lie saw
the case going against him and the
money slipping through bls fingers.
The last link In the chain of evidence
was all that was needed, aud that
would be supplied by the testimony of
bls sister. Her name was called, aud
as she stood up—she wus a beautiful
creature—there arose a buzz of admira­
tion such as sometimes comes from an
audience, She flustered at that and
hesitated, then started for the witness
stand. I got up as she was passing
me. Intending to reassure her, and ac-
cidentally stepped on her gown, Gowns
had a slight train in those days. My
awkwardness saved her life.”
He paused for a moment to note the
effect of hlH words. "The admiration
of those In the courtroom was the final
touch to that worthless brother. He
sprang up and, drawing a revolver
from his pocket, exclaimed, 'Well, If I
don’t get the money you never will,'
and tired at her as she came toward
him. My checking her by treading on
her gown made her step backward, and
the bullet missed her by an Inch.”—
Lippincott's.
SIGNS OF POISON.
DUBLIN JARVIES.
JapKkrar Srttlemeats Aml«l
Grstra or kivererma.
What a Mudtlen Flow nt Mouth Water
May Indicate.
D». Trail mentions the bewilderment
of a family that was attacked with a
"water rage." incomprehensible until
Investigation revealed the fact that a
lot of horseradish in their kitchen gar
den had got mixed with some aconitt
herbs.
The sudden flow of saliva betrays
the effect of some metallic polson-
lcnd perhaps or verdigris (oxide of cop
peri—and suggests the examination ol
copper cooking utensils. Old fashioned
silver spotms were often Imitated with
plated copper and In course of time
furnished it clew to their bottom facts
by' turning black, then black with
greenish tints, but only after their
secret had been intimated by a spitting
epidemic. It ls the same with leud
Chewing a leaden bullet for a couplf
of seconds makes the "mouth water”—
not us a hint as a desire for additional
supplies, but to rinse out the palate
and remove saliva that might cause
mischief by finding Its way into the
stomach.
A decorative painter who nevei
touched such things as purls green ot
cinnabar without disinfecting his hands
and mouth was greatly puzzled by the
morbid activity’ of his salivary glands
He had to spit like a tobacco fiend and
finally traced his trouble to a substance
known as "bronze- dust" that had set
tied on his lips and nostrils ami, under
the Influence of moisture, had be-en de
veloplng copper poisons.
Paris green not rarely gets blown
like dust nil over the fields it Is sup
Barred Stranger*.
"Many times," said Colonel Bill Ster­ posed to protect from Insect plagues
rett of Texas reflectively. “I have seen then, moistene-d by dew or drizzling
the disastrous effects of butting Ill. rains, forms a paste and clings to vege
Sometimes the butter In gets the worst table substances, where its presence it
of it and sometimes not. Now I call to never suspected, till their consumer»
mind the case of a man down in my complain of colic and mouth water.—
state who got into a seven handed What To Eat.
game of poker and was done right and
proper. After be laid lost his money
TWO GREAT LEADERS
he went out ami formulated the theory
that he had been robbed. He meditat­ Disraeli and Gladstone and Their
Enmity Tmrard Flach Other.
ed over this for an hour or two and
then determined to go back and tell
Disraeli wit was too much for Glad
the people he had been playing with stone. The great Litteral bad but ont
exactly what he thought of them.
adjective for his Tory opponent, and
“He climbed upstairs and dashed that was "devilish.” Never during the
Into tlie room. While he was out the years of their opposing leadership had
game laid changed entirely. There was the two tiny social relations. Each
nobody playing who had been at the made light of the other’s literary ef­
table with him.
forts. Some one asked Lord Beacons
"He began talking before be looked, Held to define the difference lietweeu
though, and said. 'I Just come up here a misfortune and a calamity, nnd un
to say you are tlie biggest lot of thieves hesitatingly it came. "If Mr. Gladstone
I ever knew.’ Then he looked. The should fail Into the Thames, it would
men at the table prepared to get up be a misfortune. If any one should
and slay this abusive interloper, but pull him out, It would be a calamity."
Ids presence of mind did not leave him.
The best of all the Gladstone-Disraeli
“ 'Barrin' strangers.' he said as he stories tells how once at a Ixmdon din
backed out of the door—'barrin' stran­ ner party the ladles at the table were
gers. of course.' ” — Chicago Inter asked which they would marry if they
bad to marry one or the other, the
Ocean.
great Liberal or the great Tory. All
declared promptly in favor of Beacons
Colonel Reveley's i Plaint.
Colonel Bill Zeveley of Muscogee, field save one, who hastened to explain
I. T., having heard the east a-calllng, that she had rather wed Gladstone that
is bnca in Washington. says the New she might* elope with Disrneli and so
was in break her husband's heart. Tills hap-
Y'ork World. While the colonel
i
the southwest this time for a few I*enltig was of course- retold to Disraeli,
Svetins days toe Miltoi <>1 The Kansas uno so pleased waM be over it flint be
City Star, noting with evident Jealousy suspended a cabinet dehate on the
the popularity of Colonel Zeveley in chances of n continental war In order
these parts, wrote nn editorial article. to relate it.—Warwick James Price in
In which he sa.l,<’ “Oqt . here l>e 1« Criterion.................. ..
known ns J. W. Zeveley. When he
A Case of Too Much Children.
gets to St. Louis he is William Zeve­
In a volume of reminiscences n very
ley. As soon ns he arrives in Wash­
ington lie Ls denominated as Colonel funny story Is told of tbe late Bishop
Bill Zeveley. nnd God only knows what Bloomfield, who, having a family by
the tcsselated satraps of Broadway Ids first wife, married a second time.
rail him. This alone Is clear. Ilfs This Mrs Bloomfield wus a widow,
fame In Kansas City Is Imperishable. with a briHnl <>f tier own. and In due
He ls the man who first introduced the course a third family arrived on the
fashion In Kansas City of wearing a scene, One day the bishop was dis
turtssl by his wife running Into his
plug bat and spats before breakfast."
“Now, what do you think of that?" study in u great state of excitement.
asked Colonel Zeveley ruefully. “A “What Is It. dear?” he testily Inquired.
plug hat nnd spats liefore breakfast, “Oh. bishop!" was her agonlz«l reply,
when everybody knows I never got up "Quick, quick! There's not a moment
to lose! Your children are aiding with
liefore breakfast In my life.”
my children aud are murdering onr
In a Qnnndary.
children!”
Johnny—I wish my folks would agree
Those Two Words.
upon one thing and not keep me all
"She broke off the engagement yester
the time In a worry. Tommy—What
have they been doing now? Johnny— day. and now she's sorry for it.”
"I don't think so. She told me last
Mother won't let me stand on my bend,
and dad Is all the time fussing because night that she didn't care.”
"Yes. but she told me today that she
I wear my shoes out so fast
didn’t care—very much.”—Philadelphia
Aatfar^tlc Rnptlam.
Press.
“The Joneses took every precaution
Patience is not nerveless and weak,
at the christening of their first baby.”
"Every precaution?"''
but vigorous and powerful. The Scrip­
“Yen; they boiled the water."— tural synonym is steadfast endurance. ,
Cleveland Leader.
—Boston Watchman.
«
A NAHKOlV ESCAPE.
VILLAGES IN THE DARK.
The
ll.pr-y Go Lucky llarkmr.
the Irish Metropolis.
ol
The Dub.'ln jurvles are not what you
would call good whips. They drive, as
unladylike people say, like the dlvil;
they cut around comers featly enough
and go slashing up heartbreaking hills,
but nine out of ten of them drive with
it loose rein. They talk to the fare,
■ nd the little horse runs on, doing tlie
best he can and following his own
dauntless will. I lay no fault upon the
Jarvy. The Irish horse shares Paddy's
gragh for Independence. Of him, too,
it may be said that he serves without
servility.
The Jarvy—light hearted lad, be he
young or old gains In the run of the
days an average of 6 shillings. The
fares are Jolly cheap.
For a "set
down" within the boundary the charge
for two persons between 9 a. nt. and
10 p. nt. Ls only sixpence. By time
the charges are one and six an hour,
with an added sixpence for each suc­
ceeding hour. Still the Jarvy does fair­
ly well. Barney, who ls no better than
the others, took me to bls home. It
was In Spring Gardens, where there
are rows upon rows of neat little red
brick cottages, with gardens and ata
hies. They rent at 220 a year. Own­
ing his car as he does, Barney pays no
car rent to any one, and If be drives
Lawler's mare 'tls more for love than
profit. Year In and year out lie puts by
a bit, for the "childer, God bless ’em!”
are growing and will have need of edu­
cation. In his smart little home, with
bls smart little wife, there are un-
luckier men thau he.
“If 'twere not for the flghtln',” says
Mrs. O’Hea, "a better man than Barney
never pulled a shirt over bls bead.”
Barney, it seems, believes that ani­
mosities should be cultivated. Being a
good man with bls bands and blithe
and gay In battle, lie colors the week's
end with rloL—Vance Thompson in
Outing.
SEA GAZING IN BERMUDA.
Wonderful Life of Crystal Depths an
Revealed to the Observer.
It was a little parrot tisli that start­
ed out so briskly on this summer morn­
ing. Whether he was eager to keep
an appointment or had been unexpect­
edly summoned to a distant part of his
world one will never know, but one
may be certain that the matter was of
the greatest consequence so far as the
little tish was concerned. Keeping his
bright eyes fixed straight ahead, he
puss«l a corner of the reef where the
coral was Incrusted with mollusks and
sea urchins and where a pair of beauti­
ful squirrel tish, deeply engrossed in
sentimental affairs, turned to look aft
er him wonderingly through their enor­
mous eyes. Below in n deep pool a
school of allotted trunkfish played lieed
lessly, while under a projecting plate
of staghorn coral a huge grouper wait
ed expectantly, but as the parrot fish,
warned of his danger, turned quickly
away be gave his attention to a pair
of gray snappers great, quiet, ghostly
figure« that seemed like two nnadows
drifting along far down through the
green waters.
A few feet farther on and the hurry­
ing parrot fish passed a tall wa fat),
around winch three dainty butterfly
fish, clad brilliantly In yellow, were
peering into each nook and corner in
their search for small prey, while a
sober cowfish, with bls two consplcu-
ous horns, looked on sedately, Sud
denly the parrot fish turned sharply
aside to avoid a spot where the reef
was broken by jutting rocks covered
with green ulva. Around this a school
of bright little zebra striped sergeant
majors were sporting, while Just to the
right an angleflsh, whose blue body
tipped with gold first attracted the at­
tention of the mariners so many cen­
turies ago. sailed from tinder a purple
gorgonin with a disdainful air.- Metro
polltan .Magazine.
The Corset la Boon H. C.
Mr. Arthur Evans, the Oxford arch­
aeologist, who made so many Interest­
ing discoveries In the so called palace
of Minos, In Crete, found 1* a subter­
ranean sanctuary certain very nnclent
small earthenware statues, represent­
ing some goddeaa and two of her serv­
ants. The dress of the figures ls high­
ly modern. Jhe goddess, we grieve to
say, wears a corset—Just such a corset
as contemporary man shyly wonders at
In the windows of a department store.
—Everybody's.
'