Bandon recorder., November 06, 1902, Image 3

nnnnnnnttnnnnnn
n
n
n THE & & & HOWARD FIELDING n
:: DELUSION or JOHN IRWIN n
n
n
CHARLES
HOOKE
:: COPYRIGHT,
n
down town by and by. You’ll look out
aerial polo .
CHOICE MISCELLANY
. for John?”
Il, ihm I i I i d. with a look of <|i-. i^iiin?‘•
A Queer Kind ot Amusement on a
De Wei to His Men.
Paeitte Ocean Island.
which indicated that he Would resort SOME SECRETS OF PROFESSIONAL
An Englishwoman who wns pres
Writing
ou
"Our
Equatorial
Islands"
, to heroic measures If a favorable
CONJURERS REVEALED.
I ent wheu De Wet addressed the men
in the Century. James D. Hague says: aud women In a coneentratioii camp
I change did not set In very soon.
It became uu amusing dherslou to after the signing of |»eaee sends a
| I happened to meet two or three of
■ low the Mysteries Are l>ratro>ril
overturn the large dat stones beueath summary of bis remarks. The s|>eecb
■ Irwin’s friends down town in the
mid the Trleks Shorn uf Their
which the rats were hiding iu solid is a remarkable and strong mixture,
' course of the day, and I mentioned his
t hm*na
u Peep ut the Meehauistn
masses and watch them us they scam­ displaying at once De Wet's natural
condition. We held a sort of mass
Behind tlie Seelies.
pered iu all directions, pursued and
meeting on the subject aud decided
chagrin and bls determination grimly to
A behind the scenes view of the fa­ quickly snatched up by the uiun-o’-war
that what he needed was an ocean
abide by the promise lie bus given. He
♦
voyage. Enrol** was out of the ques­ mous illusions with which conjurers hawks. These crafty birds were apt to
said: "Of course you will ull like to
tion because of expense, and the cheap have mystified mid delighted genera­ learu that the appearance of a mau ask me the question, ’Have we lost?’
W.
1902, BY
southward runs to Bermuda, Cuba or tion after generation lias peculiar fusel walking ou the Island, especially with
In a word, I must say, ’Yes.’ Our flag
the gulf were unseasonable; so we set­ nations. There are few ol’ us who u dog. meant rats for them, and any
is fallen. It Is dead and burled, never
tled upon u trip to I’rlnce Edward Is­ vulue our own childish Illusions so one thus goiug forth was usually lol
to rise ugnln. uml we are uow under u
land. By using our united pulls for
lowed by u hovering dock, ready and
new government, which we have to
HE upstairs girl rushed Into Gravesend pi-ople, and It ought to be passes aud collecting about $25 among highly that we will not part with them impatient for the sport they had
sene, not ns well as we served our
my room to tell me that some­ done next week.”
us it would be possible to start him off for tlie fun of seeing how we have been leurued to expect. A rut brought to
fooled.
“
At
any
rate.
”
said
the
doctor,
with
thing was the matter with
band by tlie dog was quickly toast'd in own, lint a great deal latter. Hunger,”
with all expenses paid both ways.
Here are examples of some of the air. where tlie birds were ready to lie went on. ”COIIl|M*lled me to give in,
Mr. Irwin. In itself the in- decision, “we must get him out of this
( to be CONTINl'KM.)
but I stood till the rille was taken out
best known tricks:
formation wns not Important; Indeed, room. Isn’t there a cooler place in tlie
snatch it. sometimes with a contest on
The box trick is as clever as well the w ing for the disputed possession. at my baud. 1 could point my linger
It wns no real Information at all. house anywhere? I don’t want to send
A GOOD PRESCRIPTION.
known and as old as any. A heavy, One form of tliis sport, u sort of aerial to a good many cowards here who
Something always was the matter him to a hospital.”
brass bound vliest is exhibited. An as­ polo, which st'cuieil to be as good fun were going to shoot tlie English In this
I
mentioned
the
room
on
the
second
Laughter
as a Stomach Cure and an
with Mr. Irwin—always had been, to
sistant is placed in a large canvas bag, for the birds in for the observers, con­ way uml that way. but who never
Aid to Health.
the lH>st of my knowledge and belief. floor, adding that I did not believe
Worry is but one of tlie many forms tin* mouth of which Is securely fus­ sisted iu tossing two rats Into the air fired a shot ami simply surrendered.
The gentleman himself once told me John had the money to pay for it in
that It Itegan 300 years before he was advance, h formality which Mrs. Rear­ of fear, so that worry tends to the ioned, ami tlie bag is placed in tlie nt (lie same moment, not singly and 1 indeed thought more of you would
born.
His earliest known ancestor don would certainly exact, and the production of Indigestion. Indigestion chest, which is locked and roped.
apart, but tied together with about remain loyal, as some of us did and
were true to the last. But, as it I h , If
'I lie box is concealed for a few sec­ six feet of stroug tw ine.
flourished or vainly tried to flourish— more particularly if it seemed that her tends to put the body of the subject in
a condition that favors worry. There onds, and when it is revealed the occu­
In London near the close of the six­ lodger was likely to be ill.
Instantly tlie birds made a dash for ever I hear of anything wrong umong
“I’ll stand half of it If you’ll stand Is thus established a vicious circle pant is sitting upon it. tlie closed and tlie ruts, and tlie successful w inner of you that is, disloyal to tlie new gov­
teenth century, and nothing is now re­
membered of him except that be was the other half,” whispered Bland. which tends to perpetuate itself, each settled bag beside him. Tlie cords mid tlie first prize went sailing off with ernment—I, Christian De Wet, will be
seals oil the box are intact.
always in trouble. The capacity for “We'll fix It up with Mrs. Reardon and element augmenting the other.
one rat in Ills bill and the other swing­ the first to arrest you ami have you
Tills astonishing feat is accomplished ing In the air beneath until suatched well punished.’’- Manchester Guardian.
It is necessary to secure a cheerful,
being so was his only legacy, and it say nothing to John—just walk him
down there and put him to bed.”
wholesome atmosphere for the dys­ tints: The occupant of the bag lias in­ by tlie second winner, when, after a
bad never passed out of the family.
W hjn of u I'rofenMioiiM 1 Beggar.
He took the thermometer out of peptic. He should eat Ills meals at a serted a wooden plug in tlie mouth quick, sharp struggle ami n taut strain
Suclt being the case, the servant’s
M. de Blowitz in tlie P ris Matin
words meant nothing, but her manner John's mouth and after examining it table where there is good fellowship while the tying Is being done. When on tlie cord, tlie bird with the weaker
was relevant, She was frightened out by the window remarked that the pa­ mid where funny stories are told, lie tlie chest is locked, he pulls It out, slips hold was compelled to let go. Tills tells an amusing story of how a sub­
out his hand, pulls off the cords, gets
then went on as a continuous perform­ scriber to tlie "Encyelopiedla Britan
of her wits. The spectacle of ordi- tient had no fever. Meanwhile Irwin should himself make a great effort to
out mid replaces the cords over the top
nary human suffering could not have had begun to add again, ending his contribute his share of this at the table,
ance, with somewhat Jonah-like but idea” used that work, lie was a pro
of tlie sack.
alarmed nor even interested oue wlio sums with the exclamation about mon- even if It I m * ms-essary, as it was in one
rapidly repeated disappearances and fessional w riter of begging letters, and
By the time the chest is roped he is
ease under my cure, for him to solemn­
had served In Mrs. Reardon’s boarding ey.
reappearances of tlie little rats, swal­ In them he represented himself to be
“Out of his head,” said the doctor, ly and seriously collect tunny para­ free. Tlie chest lias a secret opening, lowed and reluctuntly disgorged by liow one sort of a person and then un
house for a period of seven years;
usually at the eml, and while it is bid­
tlie birds In quick succession until the other, "getting tip" from tlie pages of
. therefore I was led to suspect a dis- “Wliat he needs Is a little cracked lee graphs from tlie press, and at first in­
den lie crawls out. A slim uian is
flock, thoroughly exhausted by their his encyclopedia the necessary his
tiuctly uuusual occurrence. If some- and a cool place to lie down In. I’ll terject them Hpusmodicully during lulls usually employed to do the trick.
Impetuous flight and extraordinary torlcal knowledge to give his letters
thing was the matter with Mr. Irwln give him something to make him sleep. in the conversation at the table. The
I
lie
vanity
fair
trick
is
one
of
the
that had never been the mutter with John.” lie said, turning to the patient, very efforts and determination of the most battling in the repertory of the exercise, alighted on the ground for a plausibility. Thus, he explained, that
him before it must be worth looking “we’re going to take you down stairs mun to correct his own silent habits ut black art. A woman stands before a short truce, when tlie two temporary having written a letter in which tie
at. and upon this consideration I to a better room—second floor back, table, to correct his feelings of dis­ large mirror about teu feet high mid stakeholders would be found sitting was a potter w ho had been chemically
couragement and worry, were in them­
face to face, keenly eying each other poisoned and unfitted for work, "he
ascended two flights of stairs to the you know."
selves a promise of success. The; ef­ placed in a heavy frame. About three from opposite ends of the string still used the encyclopedia for details of his
“
Sixteen
and
four
are
twenty,
”
re
­
gentleman’s apartment.
fort made was adequate to tlie obsta­ feet from tlie floor is a small shelf connecting them, each anxiously on jxittery trade, of which he himself was
It must not be Inferred from what sponded Irwin, “and one and one and
cles to be overcome, lie succeeded, and placed against the mirror, the bottom tlie sharp lookout for sudden jerks und entirely Ignorant. Tlie one word, ’ka­
I have said about Irwin’s troubles that one and one—in heaven’s name, I must
the spectacle of that man trying to of which is about eighteen inches from unpleasant surprises, while all the oth­ olin,' which he used In Ids letters, and
lie was blind or crippled or ill of any have some money!”
be funny at table when he felt thor­ tlie floor. Tlie glass having been duly er pursuers gathered around In a ring, the explanation of tlie use of the ma­
“
You
must
have
thirty
grains
of
sul-
grave disease. Ill he frequently was,
oughly discouraged mid blue Is one we inspected, tlie young woman mounts waiting for tlie two prize birds to fly. terial made every one believe In the
phonal,
”
said
the
doctor,
with
decision.
but bls friend, Dr. Bland, who attend­
tlie shelf. She then turns to arrange
shall never forget.
Tlie general aspect of all participants genuineness of Ids appeal ami brought
ed hint gratis, always said It was mere “That's wliat you need.”
Laughing Is in itself also a useful her hair by lie mirror. She is asked to si-vmed to verify tlie familiar adage him a perfect harvest of banknotes
He tbok John by the right arm and
accident—an obscure dietary misfor­
exercise from (lie standpoint of diges­ lace tlie audience, but again and again
tune, a stray ptomaine In the lobster I possessed myself of the left. Thus tion. It stirs up all the abdominal turns her back, lienee tlie name of the that tlie pleasure is not in the game, and postal money orders.”
we
marched
the
poor
fellow
down
tlie
but in the cliase.
salad or a mouthful of air from a
organs, it increuses (lie circulation of trick.
H okum Antique«.
New York street excavation, In ap- stairs while he protested In a voice the blood, it Increases peristalsis, it in­
Finally, losing patience, the perform­
The remarkable disclosure that one
pearance he was healthy enough, which grew louder constantly that six­ creases the secretion of gastric juices. er thrusts n small screen in front of
SCIENCE SIFTINGS.
of the ancient Roman statuettes in
though worn thin by worry, and pre- teen and seven were twenty-three, and Five minutes’ deliberato’lmigliing after her, tires a pistol at the spot where
the museum at Vienna is found to be
one
for
the
washerwoman
made
twen
­
While
volcanic
eruptions
are
usually
maturely gray.
i
each meal would be mi excellent pre­ she was standing, snatches away the
restricted in area, earthquakes are uot. rich in tobacco products and to be, In
His room was the farthest 1 front the ty-four. We put him to bed. and then scription for some people. Family Doe screen, aud she has vanished.
If all the mountains In the world fact. Indisputably made from the worn
front door and worth $7 a week, with 1 went out to buy some Ice and to get tor.
Tlie top, bottom and sides of the mir­
sulplional
powders
from
the
drugstore.
were
leveled, tlie average height of out mouthpieces of pipes ami cigar
board, by Mrs. Reardon’s scale of
ror have been in view all the time and
holders will send a shock through all
The
last
thing
I
saw
as
I
left
tlie
room
the
land
would rise nearly 250 feet.
prices. It was a moderate charge for
only the center has been hidden for u
THE BIRTH OF JAPAN.
the cabinets (with a small ct In Eu
The face of Jupiter presents u con­
one who earned so good an Income was Irwin's linger making imaginary
few seconds.
rope. It is Uow asserted tliut the ma
with bis pen, yet Irwin was always figures on the pillow. The last thing I CuriouN Legend of tlie Creation
The secret lies in the fact that the siderable number of murkiiigs, uotably jority of tlie antique works of art of
heard
was
bls
crazy
outcry,
“
I
must,
I
Handed
D
umb
by
tlie
JitpuueNe.
one
great
scarlet
patch
covering
uearly
bothering me on Saturdays fora couple
lower part of the mirror Is made
this description are the work of eon
must have some money!”
The following is the curious legend double, the bottom of tlie upper part 400.000 square miles.
of. dollars to piece out Mrs. Reardon's
temporary Greeks, w ho appear to have
It
was
dinner
time
when
I
got
back,
of the creation as It Is told in Japan: being concealed by a second sheet of
The amount of beut produced by an made this unsavory Industry theirs.
money or to gratify tile washerwoman,
average mun iu a day’s work would be As Lord Macaulay has It In a well
who must go to Coney island on Sun­ but the operation of cracking ice to Clouds formed the bridge on which silvered glass placed in front of it.
day. What he did with bls money put on John's head, with other neces­ once god Yzunaghi and his spouse
The shelf tits against the line of suttieient to raise sixty three pounds of known lay
heaven knows. He spoke of debt, but sary attentions, delayed me too long Yzanuma stood pondering on the rid junction, mid enables the mirror to be water from freezing to boiling point.
Such cunning they who live on high
when he contracted It I cannot guess, for Mrs. Reardon's table, so Bland and die of existence, whether tlie begin­ examined by tlie audience. As soon as
Cirrus clouds were once observed at
liuve given unto (tie Greek.
unless the rumor that he had been so I had a dinner sent in, with a quart of nings of worlds mid the beginnings of the screen is placed the mirror slides a height of 43,800 feet. Tills is by fur
We may even adapt another line
champagne
in
a
cooler.
John
could
not
life lay slumbering in that sea of tqi about a foot into the top of the tlie greatest height at which cloud
foolish as to assume his brother’s be
eat much, but he drank some of the chaos. Yzanaghi, apparently more en­ frame. The bottom of this mirror is vapor bus ever been noted above tlie from the same source by the alteration
accurate.
of one word to form a motto for the
wine, and that, together with the sul- terprising than philosophically In­ cut away in tlie middle, leaving a hole surface of the earth.
I found him pacing the floor, though
collector of such curiosities:
plional, put him to sleeji a little before clined, seized ills shimmering spear about eighteen inches square, which
Experiments made while iu a balloon
there was little room for sucli exercise.
Leave to tlie Greek liis umber nymphs!
it o'clock. Then Bland and I shaded mid plunged It into tlie black and was previously concealed from view .show that when a height of 15,000
His hair wns rumpled, and the collar
—London News.
the gas so that It would not shine on seething flood. Pulling It up again, lie by the double glass at the base.
feet has been readied the number of
of his shirt had been ripped from its
| the bed and sat playing poker until discovered seven salt drops on its dia­
Through this hole the lady instantly corpuscles in the human blood have in­
in front.
I’ll» Oldest Vessel In I se.
| about midnight, when the medical gen­ mond point, which, dropping, con­ slips, and escapes by a board which creased by one-third.
“Seven and seven are fourteen,” said tleman went home with $20 of my mon-
A curious old boat arrived at White­
densed mid formed the Island of Cliso- bus been pushed forward from behind
The atmospheric pressure upon the haven, England, tlie other day. At
he, “and three are seventeen and one I ey in his pocket.
korosima.
tlie scenes while tlie vanity fair by­ surface of an ordinury mau is 32,400 one time, a hundred years ago, the ves
makes eighteen and four make—blessed
I went to my room and was soon
Thereupon Yzanaghi and Ills spouse play was going on. The glass then pounds, or over fourteeu and u half
heaven! I must have some money!”
Bel suiled regularly from Portaferry to
asleep, but within an hour I was awak­ selected the spot of earth which had
“What’s the matter, Irwin?” I de­ ened by a monotonous and distressing thus been created as their permanent slides down again, the screen is re­ tons. Tlie ordinary rise and full of the Whitehaven und was then called the
manded. “Wliat are you raising such sound. It proceeded from John, whom dwelling place and peopled It with In­ moved. and tlie mirror appears just barometer increases or decreases this 1’ortaferry frigate, ami afterward the
as solid as ft was before.
pressure by 2.500 pounds.
a row about?”
name of the Three Sisters was be
I found pacing his room clothed in the numerable genii of animal and plant
Another of the most astounding feats
stoweil upon her. But. most extraor
“Say ten,” said he. “Ten and four upper half of his ragged pyjamas and life and spirits of the elements. And
Ills Offhand Manner.
dlnary of all, it Is solemnly alleged that
are fourteen and one makes fifteen and repeating bls endless additions. He around tills “palace of immortality” of modern magic is that of making a
person or Object apparently float in the
"Dan,” said a contractor to one of she was used in 1080 at the siege of
four”—
paused a moment as I entered and ad­ rose eight other Islands—Awadsi, the air. A couple of ordinary chairs are
Ills trusted employees, “when you are Londonderry to curry provisions up
“Sit down and keep quiet,” said I. dressed me by name. It was the first island of foam; the mountainous Clio,
placed on tlie stage—well toward tlie seeing about that lime this morning, 1 tlie famous
ugh Foyle in those stir­
“.You’ve been overworking In tills hot time lie had really recognized any one Yamato, blessed with fruit; Yyo, un­
back, which is draped witli black cloth w ish you to mention to Dempsey tliut 1 ring times. Ii this be so and the state
place, and you mustn’t do it any more. since Ills seizure.
surpassed In Its beauty; the qulnquan- —and upon these is laid a broad, thick
What you need is rest.”
“Frank,” he cried, wringing his gtilar Tslkousi, Sado, rich In copper plank. A young lady is then intro­ would like to have that bill paid. You uient seems to be founded upon fact—
needn't press It, you know, but Just the Three Sisters Is tlie oldest vessel In
“Blessed heaven!” lie cried. "I must hands—“Frank, I must have some mid gold; Yki, one of the pillars of
duced and Is assisted to place herself mention it to him in un offhand man­ actual use.
have some money!”
money!”
heaven, and Oko, surrounded by three in a recumbent position on the plank.
ner.”
“You worry too much,” said I. “Don't
Being only half awake, I forgot that satellites.
He then draws aside tlie chairs, and
“Yes, sorr.”
Salary One Dollar Per Year.
do IJ. Let the other fellow walk the the man was out of lils mind, and 1
Such was the birth of Japan, of that tlie plank, with the lady on it, remains
"I got tlie money from Dempsey."
Charles Henry Gibbs, keeper of the
floor.”
replied to his appeal as If It had been curious land of Fusiyama. with Its apparently suspended in the air. To
said Dan on liis return.
"bug light” at Nantucket, annually,
And I tried to make him sit down rational.
amiable population of artist artisans, prove that tlie plank is not supported,
“I’m very glud. You merely alluded about July 20, receives a check for $1,
“The doctor,” said I, "won all nay its graceful teahouses. Its glistening tlie exhibitor takes a large hoop and
upon the bed.
to it iu un offhand way, 1 suppose?”
bis yearly salary. The old lighthouse
“Seven aud four are eleven and one- money at poker. I haven’t a dollar in silks, its grotesque dwarf trees. Its passes it backward and forward over
“Yes, sorr. 1 bunded him the bill and has been put out of action by shifting
white cranes and dreamy lotus ponds. aud around tlie plunk.
one for the washerwoman,” lie mutter­ my clothes.”
told him if he didn't pay it 1 would let sands on the south side of Nantucket
“What shall I do?” he groaned. "Sev­ —Harper’s Magazine.
ed, taking an old letter from Ids pocket
Yet there is an attachment. As soon off my hand aud give him a black eye harbor, but the government allows the
en
aud
one
are
eight
and
four
”
—
and scratching upon tlie envelope with
ns the lady is placed In position on tliut be wouldn’t forget for a mouth, aged mariner to live in it mid pays
The Tired Foot.
But I bad reached my limit of en­
a pencil, “and four are sixteen and one
the board a carriage, placed behind the und he paid it ut wunst.”—London An­ 1dm the smallest of all federal salaries
A lady was watching a potter at bis black curtain and supporting a strong
—one for me. Two boiled eggs are durance, and the next instant he was
swers.
to give him ottleinl sanction. In his
ten, and coffee Ove, Is fifteen. Twice lying on the bed with my right hand work whose one foot was kept with a Iron bar twice bent upon itself, is
youth Captain Gibbs chased the whale
fifteen is thirty, or, say, three times in over his mouth and most of my weight “never slackening speed turning his pushed forward by an assistant so that
Filial Sympathy.
for a livelihood. Now lie breeds cats
centered upon the region of ids solar swift wheel round” while the other the Iron bar, which is covered with
two days.”
“When 1 was your age,” suld Mr. ami liens.
rested
patiently
ou
the
ground.
When
While I held him thus I
“For heaven's sake, old man, quit plexus.
bluck cloth, comes out through a silt Goldbags sternly, "I earned my own
figuring!” I exclaimed. “There's noth­ talked to him like a father to his the lady said to him in sympathizing In tlie curtain while tlie exhibitor is living.”
Women an Judge«.
toue, "How tired your foot must be!” pretending to mesmerize the lady. The
His son looked uueasy. but was si-
ing In It. Come and take a walk. Tills only son.
That women are needed ut times in
“What you need,” said I, “Is a good the man raised his eyes and said; “No, bar has at its end a very strong clip, lent
Judicial positions is shown by the case
room Is an oven.”
“Well, have you nothing to say for of the woman who applied to the
As a matter of fact that back attic night’s rest, and I’m going to see that ma'am; it isn't the foot that works and the performer, while making his
courts for a divorce from her husband
Is built on a plan which divine mercy you get it. You’ll be right here until that's tired. It's tlie foot that stands hypnotic passes, guides tills on to the yourself in that connection?”
“N nothing, sir, except that 1 sym­ on the ground of cruelty, alleging that
board. The chairs are then removed,
rejected when perdition was In con­ you stop talking foolishness and go to That’s It.”
If you want to keep your strength, and the board remains suspended by pathize with you, uml congratulate you he had given her three dresses only in
templation. Irwin was absurd to work sleep.”
on tlie fact tliut it’s all over.”—London four years. No man, though a rein­
He became quiet at once, except for use It. If you want to get tired, do tlie Invisible iron bar.
In It Yet for days and nights In the
nothing. As a matter of fact, we all
carnation of Solomon In w isdom mid
The hoop is passed along from one Tit Hits.
hottest August that ever baked New an occasional childish sob, but I could
know that the last man to give a help­ end until It reaches the bend where
of Aristides in Justice, could compre­
York lie bad tolled upon a long story see that his hand was moving gently
ing hand to any new undertaking is the bar passes through the curtain. Not H« Considerate as He Might He. hend the depths of such brutality as
that he was writing for the Gravesend en the bedclothes and that the finger
“He's a good frieud of yours. Isn't t ha t.— Ba It I more A meriea n.
the man who has plenty of time on Ids The performer passes It round the end
Literary syndicate. It was sheer fool­ traced the outlining of figures. I re­
hands. It is the man mid woman who of the board and himself walks be­ he?”
ishness, and 1 bad often asked him based him and sat leaning ngainst the
"Ob. only medium.”
White H ouhp Vlnitor«.
footboard, watching the dim white are doing tlie most who are always hind, passing the ring along in tlie op­
why be did not hire a better room.
"Wliat do you mean by medium?”
willing
to
do
n
little
more.
”
—
Phllmlel
Every stranger who enters tin* White
posite
direction.
Next
It
Is
brought
“Walt a minute,” said Irwin. “I hand In the darkness until I could read
“Oil, lie listens while 1 tell him all House ut Washington Is counted by mi
plila Ledger.
back again, and tlie effect is such that
could fix It tills way—seven and four the figures that It traced. Instinctive­
the average spectator is convinced that of my troubles, but lie also wants me automatic register. The instrument Is
are eleven and four ones make fifteen. ly I began to add them and In the midst
The Man mid the Wave.
tlie hoop has really been passed over to listen while he tells me all of his.”— held in the band of one of the watch­
But what’s the use? Blessed lieaven, I of that exercise I fell asleep.
Once upon a time a man was telling tlie lady and tlie board from end to Chicago Post.
men stationed at the door mid for every
When
I
awoke,
with
my
spine
In
a
must have some money!”
a tale of woe that unveiled his matri­
visitor he pushes the button. Congress­
end.
“Money Is of small value compared knot and both legs full of pins and monial experience.
He Had It.
men, senators, members of the cabinet
Another very effective illusion, ar­
to health,” said I. “Go down and en­ needles, I was alarmed by the sudden
“It was all on account of a little
“Yes; it’s Fullerton's hobby tliut ad
gage Mrs. Reardon's back room on the view of the empty bed. Immediately, dainty handkerchief,” he said. “The ranged upon the same principle, shows vice Is cheap nud within the reach of and newspaper men are not counted.
second floor; coolest room In the house. however, I perceived that John was first time that I saw the girl and be­ the head and bust of a lady supported every person.”
Taxed Cats.
1 wish 1 could afford it myself. Hello, pacing the floor, murmuring softly In fore we had been introduced she waved on a three legged stool resting on a
“Wliat does lie medn, anyhow?”
small table. One can apparently see
In the German town Augustusberg
here’s Dr. Bland I”
the same old strain. It was almost that bit of lace at me, and 1 was car­
"Wliat lie says. I suppose. He's a a tax of 25 cents on one ent mid of 75
not only between the legs of the table
“What seems to be the matter, 8 o’clock, and before I had succeeded ried away. It was a fall in love and
to the back of the stage, but through confidential divorce lawyer.” — lialtl cents on a second cat In the sn inc
in making John dress himself Dr. Bland then matrimony. But, alas, that deli­
John?” inquired the doctor.
the space between the stool and the ta­ more News.
household w as Imposed some years ago.
cate handkerchief was uo index to tlie ble.
“In the name of heaven,” replied Ir­ arrived.
It worked so well iu reducing the num­
“I have arranged to spend the whole girl’s nature, aud I found myself
win, “I must have some money.”
A fi /Esthetic Sool.
In this case the three legged stool Is
ber of struy mid valueless animals that
Bland rummaged in his pockets and day with him, If necessary,” said he. wrecked on the sea of matrimony."
"Well, did he buy tlie book?”
arranged with mirrors precisely as in
the cities are thinking of following the
Moral.—A man may be carried away
tinully pulled out a leathern case, from "Dr. Jacobs will look out for my pa­
“No,” replied the clerk. "She said exmnple of the town.
the tripod illusion, but the table, wlii< h
which he extracted a physician's ther­ tients. Of course, I shall lose some by a wave and wrecked without going has four legs, is managed different!'
she didn't like tlie cover design.”—De­
money by It, but If I can pull John near the water.—New York Herald.
mometer.
troit Free Press.
Trees as a Monument.
A large mirror is placed diagonally t
“Take this,” said lie, "and put it un­ out of this I shan't begrudge the dol­
der tlie table, joining to opposite lei
Trees are to be planted and a general
lars. Well, old man” (to Irwin) "bow
der your tongue.”
Effect of Frolt on the Stonim-h.
Thus the spectators really only sees
If we could raise our neighbor’s cbll monument erected by the inunieipality
Irwin complied rendlly enough, but do you feel today?”
The malic acid of ripe apples, either three of the legs, the fourth being situ dreu Instead of our own. there would In tlie quarantine harbor at Odessu.
John
stood
still
a
minute,
gnawing
lie would not stop pacing the floor, and
raw or cooked, will neutralize any ex­ ply the reflection of the first. New be a model generation.—New York where several British seamen are
llllllol
as he walked, with tlie thermometer his fingers.
cess of chalky mutter engendered >y York World
Newa
“I must, I simply must have some eating too much meat. It it also t e
sticking out of his mouth, he continued
Kspre«al ve.
More Than ClutMuy.
money,” he said.
to make figures on the envelope.
fact that such fresh fruits as the apple,
An Enviable Position.
It was Tommy's first glass of soda
"My fingers seem to be all thumbs
Bland looked exceedingly grave. He tlie pear and tlie plum, when taken
“How long lias he been this way?”
Biggs—1 met a man yesterday who today,” apologetically remarked the water tliut lie hud been teasing for so
felt John’s pulse, scrutinized his ripe mid without sugar, diminish acid­
asked the doctor of me.
makes
his living by buying millinery
long.
clumsy butcher.
“I don't know,” 1 1 replied. “The girl tongue, took Ills temperature and final­ ity in tlie stomach rather than provoke
Boggs—Well, wliat of It?
"Well, Tommy, how does it taste?"
"All.” said the customer significant­
ly gave him some medicine out of a It. Their vegetable sauces mid Juices
told me about it. 1 I>ld she cnll you?”
Biggs—Oh, nothing; only I've been ly, “that accounts for them getting In linked liis father.
“Yes,” said he. “I'm glad she had bottle.
are converted into alkaline ciirlsmates, buying millinery ever since I was mar
"Why.” replied Tommy, with a puz­
tlie weigh,”- Philadelphia Record.
"This stuff costs $2.50 an ounce even which tend to counteract acidity.
the sense to do It. John looks pretty
rled, anti I never made any money
zled face, "it tastes like your foot’s
to
doctors,
”
said
he
aside
to
me.
“
I
bad.”
by It.—New York Herald.
Ono firm of cloekmakers In the Black asleep." Cincinnati Enquirer.
"I told him he needed a rest,” said 1.1 bought four ounces on my way over
forest. Germany, employs 2.500 men.
TLv druggists of Philadelphia have
“Rest anil a clinnge of scene,” as­ here. I don’t know that It's any better
A New Sult In Proapert.
Mot IllssuMiletl b> Compliment«.
who make 8.000 clocks dully.
sented Blond. “He ought to go to the than good old bromide of soda, but organized for the lncor|s>ratlon of a
"All my best gowns were destroyed
Husband—Your hair Is your crown
stock
company,
capitalized
nt
$500,000
some
people
think
It
Is.
”
seashore for a month or two and take
The best cork comes from Spain, In that railway wreck.”
“It’s Sunday.” said I, “but you know to own and manage retail drug stores. Ing glory, toy dear.
life easy.”
“And didn’t the company give you
Wife—That's al) right, but I’ve got which has 020.000 square miles of cork
“I'm afraid he enn’t get away,” said we newspaper fellows have to work They expect to ultimately control 200
any redress? "—New York Press.
to have a uew bonnet Just the same.-
forest«.
I. “He's turning out a storv for the j seven days a week, so I've got to go stores in the city aud state.
:: « tt « n n «
T
::
FAMOUS ILLUSIONS.
BLAkb,
MOFFIIl
& TOWNE
it.StPawHnd Binders* Board.••
.5.5-5 7-.5H-Í» 1 Flrat Street
Tel. Multi 1WH.
43
SAN FRANCISCO.
Tapped
14 Times
Edwin W. Joy’s Test Case of
Bright’s Disease.
TVHEK TH ER an FRANCISCO BUSINESS
’ ’ men who Incorporated the J no. J. Fulluu
Co were putting the Fulton Compounds to
practical testa in casos of Bright's Disease and
Diabetes, Edwin \V. Joy, the Kearuy street
druggist, stopped oue ut the investigators aud
said he had a frieud who had au advanced case
of Bright’s Disease and was beyond human aid
Joy ••xplaiucii that b«» had been inoneofthe
large c ty t ospitals, had been tapped uearly a
dozen times and was mo weak tliut his case was
looked u|»ou us ho hopeless that his recovery
would create a seusation atid that it would be
a tine tost for the compounds. We told Joy to
send the patient’s brother down He came and
we gave him I e treatment Joy Hturted for a
trip around the world, fully expecting ou his
return to find that his friend hud joined the
silent majority
We now skip ten months Joy has returned.
His friend is uot otdy still living, but instead
of tlie tappings being a mouth apart, as former
ly, he has not been tupped forever six uu>nths,
und tusteud of being confined in u hospital he is
living at home aud is uow down on tlie street
daily and growing Mtronger all the time. There
is no wider know n druggist ou the Pacific Coast
thuu Edwin W Ju
Interested parties will find him at bis stores
Bl Kearny and < ’ullforuiu streets, where he will
confirm these important fuels aud give the de
tuilb Thor If tor of tlie Overland Monthly iu
YHStlgated the above case aud certified to lUt
entire correctness.
Medical works agree that Bright’s Disease
aud DlalHiles are incurable, but s? per cent ara
poaitivcly recovering under the Fulton Com-
pounds. (Dropsy. Bladder Trouble, Rheumatism
from uric acid, and the minor kidney diseases
are soon relieved.) Price, Il for Bright’s Dis­
ease and SI 50 for Diabetic Compound
Fra«
tests made for patients Descriptive pamphlet
mailed free. Cull or address John J. Fulton Co.,
Mills Building, Montgomery street, San Fra«-
cisco.
Save the Baby.
The mortality among
babien
during the
three teething years l.s something frightful.
The census of liMM) shows that ubout one ill
•■very seven succumbs.
The
cause
is
apparent.
With
baby's
bones hardening, tlie fontanel (opening in tlie
Mkull) chtHlng up ami itw teeth : «»rming, all
1 IlfHC »’omiiig at once create a jeniand tor
bOH»- material that nearly half the littl«
is
S.\ H(t’l ih ait* < etlclent
in.
The result
1 •■••vis 'UieHH. w 11* H*
weal In*, ever, diar
I’hneu, biniti tr lUbb’S, eonvUlblunH • tv , that
under
|*rok •• t«-rilbl\ ft»till. The «iealhN ii
i brn»* >rat’M we e :«H.«NV. tu a> nothing of
the \ awl numb« i <>ni nh- th«* big lilies that
YV »•(’»• m>( repot ted, ami this in the United
Stutrs alone.
U Iu n bub> b •» in.H Io • W e.it, w »rry or cry
oli'l wail, aliti the need H
out I
\\ hai the
imlth«* r imbibii e nor nureoti«*»
hub-
in crying out tur I h more bone
mat«-! al
Swee im.iiiH Teething
F. hh I sup
piieH 1
11 Ims xived the lives «it thousands
ol bu bi«H.
1 h »y begin tu illlpl >ve within
Iter«« I h what physicians
lot t) ■IL’Ill hull H.
tblnk ut it.
LM.»3l Washington St ,
San Francisco. June 2, ¡902
Gentlemen I am prescribing your food in
the multitude of baby (roubles du»* Io Itll
pedefi dentition
A large percentage of In
Inutile ills and
finalities are tin* result of
slow teething.
Your food supplies what the
deficient system
demands, and 1 have had
sui prising succesH with It. In scores of euses
this diet, given
with their regular ioo<l, has
not tailed to cheek the inluntile iilstresses.
Several of the more set ioum raMes would, I
feel sure, have been fatal without it. It can
not be too «luii'kl.v brought to the attention
of the mothers uf th<- country. It i^ an ub
solute necessity.
L. C. MENDEL. M 1>.
Petaluma, <’al , September 1. 1902
Dear Sirs 1 have just tried th«* teething
loud in two eases and in both it was a sue
< ess. due wits a very sei ions case, s<» eritL
• al that it was brought io me from another
• Itv tor treatment
Fatal results were feared.
In three »lays the baby »’eased worrying and
eomnieiK rd eating and Is now well. Its action
in this case was remarkable.
I would ad
vise you to put it in every drug store in this
»|ty.
Yours,
I M. PR< m TOR, M D.
Sweetman's Teething Food will carry baby
saiely and comfortably through the most dan
gerous period of child life, it renders lanc­
ing of the gums unnrcrHsaiy. It Is the safest
plan and a blessing to the baby tu not wait
tor symptoms but *i<> commence giving It the
fourth or fifth month.
Then all the teeth
will come healthfully, without pain, dis­
tress or lancing. It is an auxiliary to their
regular diet ami easily taken. Price ,*.(• cents
(enough for six weeks), sent postpaid on re
ceipt of price. Pacific Coast Agents, Inland
Drug Co., Mills Building, Sun Francisco.
The Word °PI<»nlc.M
Few people know tlie original mean­
ing of the word "plenic.” It Is to be
found set out In the London Times of
u hundred years ago. "A picnic sup­
per consists of a variety of dishes. The
subscribers Io tliis entertainment have
a liill of fare presented to them, with
a number against each dish. The lot
which he draws obliges him to furnish
the dish marked against it. which be
either takes with liim in liis carriage
or sends by a servant. The proper
variety Is preserved by the talents of
tlie maitre d’hotel, wlici forms the bill
of fare. As tlie cookery Is furnished by
so many people of fnsliloii each strives
to excel, and thus a picnic supper nut
only gives rise to much pleasant mirth,
hut generally can boast of the refine­
ment of the art.”
Where He Koile.
A schoolboy who was going to a par­
ty was eautlon»d by ills father not to
walk home if it rained and was given
money for cab bin*. It rained heavi­
ly, and great was the father’s surprise
when his son, in spite of the Instruc­
tions lie had received, arrived home
drenched to the skin.
“Did you not take a cab as 1 or­
dered you, Alfred?” tlie parent asked
st ernly.
“Ith, yes; but when I ride with you
you always make me ride Inside. This
time I rode on top with the driver.
Say, dud. It was grand!”- Utica Ob­
server.
A Wonderful Echo.
At a watering place in the Pyrenees
the conversation at table turned upon
a wonderful echo to be heard some dis
tanee off on tlie Franco Spanish fron­
tier.
"It is astonlshiug,” said an Inhabit­
ant of the Garonne. “As soon ns you
have s|Hjken you bear distinctly the
voice leap from roek to rock, from
precipice to precipice, and ns s«>on as
it has passed the frontier the who
assumes the Spanish accent.”—rear­
son's Weekly.
Safer Too.
Lover—One kiss Is worth a hundred
letters.
Damsel—Oh, you’re very sentimen­
tal.
Lover—Oh. no. The kiss, you know,
can’t be introduced In a breach of
promise suit.