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About Spilyay tymoo. (Warm Springs, Or.) 1976-current | View Entire Issue (Oct. 11, 1982)
SPILYAY TYMOO OCTOBER 11, 1982 PAGE 9 Ways to head off sibling fights Extension Family Lifelines— Notes The fighting and teaching that goes on among children in many households often makes parents uncomfortable. Do we have to live with this behavior or should it be stopped? is a question frequently asked by parents in this situation. “Jealousy is at the root of most preschoolers’ squabbles,” notes Marcelle Strattman, Oregon State University Extension human development specialist. “Jealousy is an emotion all adults and children have, but it has such unpleasant effects few want to admit it. It makes its first appearance around 18 months of age when babies become aware of what’s going on around them. When these children notice mother giving attention to someone else, a terrible fear of losing her love envelops them. Whether the someone else is a new baby, the husband, or other children in the family, the feeling is the same. It’s hard for children and many adults to accept the fact that we love many people. Throughout life we struggle with jealously—rt can be controlled but not eliminated. The first step in controlling children’s fights is to look for cause. If the problem stems from the child’s fear of losing your love, you may be unconsciously neglecting that child. Are bigger kids picking on little ones because you stick up for the little ones and tend to them more? Do little ones grab the older child’s toys, which are more interesting—a symbol of more love? “Jealousy stems from anything you do or say that in a child’s view looks like the other comes first in your love,” Straatman explains. To help children relieve feelings of jealousy make sure each child has special time with you each day. Carry through on your promise. A walk around the block, telling a favored story, helping with dinner, sitting on your lap, or praise relieves a child’s feeling of beling loved or important. To keep feelings of jealously at a minimum, void comparisons with any other children. It feels terrible to not be as good as someone else. Some parents use comparisons to motivate children to better behavior. It only leads to feelings of hatred toward the child with whom they are compared and develop urges to get even. Fighting over scarce toys or possessions is bound to occur, Straatman says. Sometimes it’s wise to let children struggle in their own way unless there is danger of physical harm. If a preschooler hits back or bites others, hold them to stop the action. You might say, “I know you’re angry, but I won’t let you hurt Danny. Here’s your ball to throw.” Five-year-olds often use unflattering language to hurt siblings. Try telling them, “Although we get angry with each other, we do not talk like that in this family—we belong together.” It gives children a sense of safety in the family to know you will protect them all in the same manner. Fight and bickering among preschoolers is a normal reaction to feelings of jealousy. Parents should assure children that they are equally loved and give equal attention to all. This will prevent children from bottling up feelings of hostility. New from Pennie Albrandt, Lee Hamilton and Doris Brackett 4-H This is Nationl 4-H Week— October 3-9, 1982. 4-H is one of the nation’s largest and most successful youth educational programs. In 4-H, youth have an opportunity to develop new interests and skills, make new friends, practice democracy and leadership, and have fun. 4-H is a cooperative effort between volunteer leaders, 4-H members, 4-H parents, and the O regon S tate University Extension Service. Its goal is to help youth become creative, productive citizens through involvement in 4-H project clubs. There are a number of 4-H club that are available to Warm Springs youth this fall! Now is the time to join 4-H . “Learn by doing” along with other 4-H members in the community. Several 4-H clubs have been in existence for the past year or more; all of them welcome new members. These clubs include: ♦Rockin’ 4-H Livestock/ Range Club-Learn to care for your own cow and show to protect the grass and soil. ♦4-H Culture & Heritage year b e g in s Club-Learn Indian dancing; older youth may join the basketball team. This year the club wants to also start a team for younger members. -♦4-H Beadwork Club-Make your own beaded articles. •4-H Outdoor/Ski Club- Learn to ski and go on ski trips in the winter; learn about the outdoors and go on hikes and float trips in the summer. ♦4-H Decorative Painting Club-Learn to paint and make things to decorate your home (or room) •4-H Sewing Crafts Club- Make small craft articles and learn something about sewing at the same time. ♦4-H Public Speaking Club- Learn to share information with groups of people. ♦4-H Rifle Safety Club- Learn to shoot and handle a gun safely. The 4-H Horse Club started |ast summer. Members do not have to own a horse to join. However it is helpful if the member has access to a horse, to ride. Some members have been learning what to look for when they do buy a horse. Several 4-H clubs are starting this fall as well. These include: ♦Beginning Crochet-Learn to crochet and make a wapus or root-digging bag. •C o n tain er G ardening- Grow plants indoors year- round. •Indian Outfits-Learn to make wing dresses along with basic sewing techniques (this club needs a leader or leaders). A 4-H Dog club may begin soon. There is a leader who has led dog clubs in the past who is interested in starting a club in Warm Springs. Interested people should contact the Extension Office so we can let you know when something happens. 4-H is always on the lookout for leaders who have skills to share with youth. It does not take any special talent or ability, only a willingness to spend time working with a group of young people. Your local Extension staff will help you get started. Contact Doris or Pat at the Extension Office for more information, 553- 1161, ext. 238. State Fair Committee— Evaluate this year’s 4-H State Fair demonstration trip and plan for next year. S im n ash o 4-H M ini- Marathon Committee—The Mini-Marathon is an all 4-H event since the closing of S im n a s h o s c h o o l. The proceeds will go to the Warm Springs 4-H leaders’ Assoc, account and will be used for future 4-H programs: The committee will organize the mini-marathon. Fall 4-H Fair Committee-A new event to be held late October or early November. It could conceively become an annual event. The purpose would be to provide a fun time for the whole family, create more awareness of 4-H in the community, and provide an opportunity to recruit new 4-H members and leaders. 4-H Member Recognition Committee—Plan the 4-H members recognition program. In the past it hasbeen a potluck dessert. There is money in the E x te n s io n b u d g e t fo r recognition items. ' Some of these take more time and energy than others. The amount of time you can give depends on you. But every little bit helps. Education classes 4-H planning committee starting soon Mark the follwoing two /Oriental Cooking Class events on your calendar to Coming to Warm Springs attend! for a third time to show us how to cook easy, inexpensive, low Machine Maintenance and fat and good tasting oriental Wing Dress-Making Classes dishes are Takako Carlson and This will be a two-meeting Anne Scissons. Takako and class from 9:00 a .m . to 12:00 Anne live in Beaverton and noon on two Saturdays, donated their time last spring October 30 and November 6. to teach two classes that had The classes will be held at the attendance of over 60 people. Extension/4-H meeting room Their food was a hit and so and kitchen in the basement of were they. the Daycare building. the latest class to be held Bring your owri machine if on At Saturday. October 23, from you would like to learn how to clean, oil and maintain it, or if 10:00 a.m. to 12:00 noon, to be prepared are Won there are parts of your machine dishes Soup, fried Won Ton, ou would like to learn how to Ton . e. If vou don’t have a slamon chowder, yaki-soba machine, your are welcome to (fried noodles using inexpen use a machine provided by siv e p a c k a g e d i n s t a n t soup,/noodles), and suwae Extension during the class. (m arinated cucumber and In addition to learning about seafood). Recipes will be y o u r sew ing m a c n m e s , available for dishes prepared instruction will be available on during the classes given in the making wing dresses from start Spring. to finish. Each person will There is a $2.00 charge for make a dress during the two classes, There is no charge for the class to cover cooking this class but participants will supplies. If y ou are interested in have to supply material for attending this class, come to the Extension office and sign up their wing dress project. and pay the $2.00 fee to If you are interested in Sandra. There is a 20-person attending, call your name into limit to the class and the only Sandra at the Extension office. way a space can be reserved for Phone: 553-1161, extension you is to pay the class fee when signing up. 238! The 4-H program at Warm Springs is growing. That means two things: 1) there is more work to do and, 2) there are more people to do it. To make better use of the talent and good ideas out there, we are organizing several committees. Some 4-H leaders have expressed interest in working on specific 4-H events or programs. But you don’t have to lead a 4-H project to be a 4-H leader. You could be an assistant leader, a resource person, a concerned parent, a junior leader, or a committee member. Some opportunities to contribute your ideas are: Cover windows to cut heat loss Windows bring light into a Beating the cash crunch much heat from excaping home. But, according to windows is to cover them with Extension housing and energy plastic during winter months. specialist Sue Badenhop, they Cut pieces of heavy plastic aren’t very good at keeping the shape of the window to be heat in. A single-pane window covered,'but large enough so loses ten times as much heat as that pieces of wood lathe can be wall area that’s insulated. If stapled down over the edges of people have insulated their the plastic. This holds the home, weatherstripped and plastic flat and close to the caulked and haven’t done window so that less heat anything to the windows, they escapes around edges and wind could have thirty-five to fifty can’t tear plastic away from percent of their heat loss on windows. their house going through the Covering windows with windows in the winter time. plastic is only a temporary type Short of boarding up your of insulation, but it can help to windows, one solution, says keep down the heating bill until Badenhop, is to install storm a permanent storm window or windows, or insulated window insulated window covering can coverings. Another inexpen be found. sive and easy way to keep so
