Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR
About Willamette week. (Portland, Or.) 1974-current | View Entire Issue (Aug. 11, 2017)
Where to drink this week. 1. Chandelier Bar HENRY CROMETT BAR REVIEW 1451 SE Ankeny St., 503-841-8345, chandelierbarpdx.com. In a space that looks like the Black Lodge from Twin Peaks, drink rare sakes that taste like you’ve probably never had them. 2. Urban Farmer 525 SW Morrison St., 503-222-4900, urbanfarmerportland.com. For a steep $20 at this steakhouse high in the Nines, you can get the fi nest Vieux Carré we’ve ever had in Portland. 3. Breakside Slabtown 1570 NW 22nd Ave., 503-444-7597, breakside.com. Breakside’s new Slab- town spot now has a nice nacho plate and burger to pair with the great beer—look for the Happy Unbirthday lager with lemon verbena. 529 SW 4th Ave., jacklondonrevue.com. Jazz is back on the west- side, in the no-nonsense velvet-curtained base- ment of classic pool hall Rialto, lit up with candles and Christmas lights and outfi tted with deep vinyl booths. DOLLAR THRILLS: October is baseball heav- en and football’s early-season shakeout, the last month before Blazers fans get really depressed. And at your neighborhood Applebee’s (ours is at 1439 NE Halsey St., 503-284-8040, applebees.com), it’s $1 mothafuckin’ margaritas all day, every day, all month. Few press releases have ever spurred our editorial staff to swifter action: We rushed down within minutes of reading about it to drink two Dollaritas™ apiece, batch-mixed into tupperware and poured into weird little beer mugs fi lled with ice cubes. The cheap margaritas are here, we’re told, to remind America that Applebee’s is also a bar. But it is not a bar. The physical bartop and rail are a horseshoe island in a sea of heavy booths and heavy eaters. In its clunky corporate reliability and naive huckster branding—one sign cheerily announces $12.99 all-you-can-eat riblets on Thursdays—Applebee’s is a retreat from both ecstasy and tragedy. Noth- ing good or bad is possible here. The half-rack of ribs tastes nostalgically like those frozen Tony Roma’s ribs my father used to bake in the oven. An onion-laden burger is so full of fat and sugar, the bun seems to dissolve. A mere $25 buys a steaming hill of calories, including burger, ribs, mashed potatoes, fries, green beans and onion rings. And as for those Dollaritas? They taste a little like lime Kool-Aid. Each little mug is a sweet and sour bomb lit with a fuse of budget tequila. Four dollars buys the sugar-spinning buzz of two grown men. The Dollarita is, perhaps, a miracle. The mood outside these walls may be apocalyptic, but Kansas-based Applebee’s is the still-smiling face of fake America. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Killingsworth Dynasty Whiskey Bar Quarterworld Tube 832 N Killingsworth St 31 NW 1st Ave 4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd 18 NW 3rd Ave Cake (hiphop) Sage Armstrong VCR TV (heavy synth, dark dance, soundtrack) Sunday Funday 4. Creepy’s 627 SE Morrison St., 503-889-0185. Creepy’s isn’t creepy, unless you think the circus is creepy: It’s clown paintings, big- eyed kids and John Quincy Adams, plus goofball coff ee cocktails and a great spicy chicken sandwich. 5. Jack London Revue Lay Low Tavern 6015 SE Powell Blvd DJ Dad Rock Moloko SAT, OCT. 14 45 East The Goodfoot 2845 SE Stark St Tropitaal Desi Latino Soundclash w/ Daniela Karina, Casual Aztec 3967 N. Mississippi Ave 315 SE 3rd Ave King Tim 33 1/3 (aqua boogie, underwater rhymes) Felix Da Housecat Quarterworld Black Book 4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd 20 NW 3rd Ave Quarter Flashback (80’s vinyl) The Ruckus (rap, r&b, club) Spare Room 1332 W Burnside St 4830 NE 42nd Ave 90’s Dance Flashback The Hustle (disco) Dig A Pony Star Bar 736 SE Grand Ave 639 SE Morrison St Deena Bee (hiphop, r&b) DJ Smooth Hopperator Holocene The Goodfoot 1001 SE Morrison St 2845 SE Stark St Verified (bass, rap, club) Soul Stew (funk, soul, disco) Kenton Club The Lovecraft Bar 2025 N Kilpatrick St Black Book 421 SE Grand Ave 20 NW 3rd Ave NecroNancy Sugar Town: Spellbound (r&b, soul) The Paris Theatre Killingsworth Dynasty Dig A Pony 6 SW 3rd Ave 832 N Killingsworth St 736 SE Grand Ave Friday the 13th (edm) J-Boogie (japanese dance) Emerson (hiphop, r&b) The Secret Society Mississippi Studios Star Theater 116 NE Russell St 3939 N Mississippi Ave 13 NW 6th Ave Jai Ho! Dance Party Jump Jack Sound Machine: Monster Mash-Up Hive (goth, industrial) 1006 SE Hawthorne Blvd Moloko 421 SE Grand Ave Waves 3967 N. Mississippi Ave Valentines Klavical (modern soul, heavy breaks, hiphop) Toffee Club 232 SW Ankeny St Honesty DJ Both Josh Crystal Ballroom The Lovecraft Bar 421 SE Grand Ave Musick For Mannequins w/ DDDJJJ666, Magnolia Bouvier & DJ Acid Rick (sexbeat, halloweenishness) Valentines 232 SW Ankeny St Devil’s Pie (hip-hop, r&b) Whiskey Bar MON, OCT. 16 Elvis Room 203 SE Grand Ave DJ Sam FM Ground Kontrol 511 NW Couch St Reaganomix: DJ ROCKIT (80s) Sandy Hut 1430 NE Sandy Blvd DJ Joel Jett The Lovecraft Bar 421 SE Grand Ave Black Mass (goth, post-punk) 31 NW 1st Ave Johnny Yono TUE OCT. 17 Dig A Pony SUN, OCT. 15 Flux (rap, r&b, club) The Lovecraft Bar Kawaii Party Presents: DWMA Monster Ball 736 SE Grand Ave Noches Latinas (salsa, merengue) Kelly’s Olympian 426 SW Washington St Party Damage: DJ Dave Cantrell The Embers Avenue 100 NW Broadway Recycle (dark dance) The Lovecraft Bar 421 SE Grand Ave Sleepwalk (deathrock, gothrock, post-punk) Tube 18 NW 3rd Ave Tubesdays w/ DJ Jack Willamette Week OCTOBER 11, 2017 wweek.com 37