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About East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current | View Entire Issue (Sept. 13, 2016)
ROUND-UP Tuesday, September 13, 2016 East Oregonian Page 7A Parade with a side of commentary Duo’s banter delights audience By KATHY ANEY East Oregonian Miller. Melton. Melton. Miller. The surnames of Bob Miller and Tom Melton are interchangeable on Dress-Up Parade day. The duo uncorks a river of repartee that lows as they provide running commentary for parade spectators. Miller and Melton started talking about 10 a.m. Saturday from their broad- casting platform in front of the Hamley Steakhouse and kept up the unbroken banter for about an hour as the 89-entry parade wended its way east up Dorion, west on Court and past their booth. The parade began with the Kyle Burnside Memorial Run. Runners blasted off the line to the boom of a cannon and ran the one-and- a-half-mile route. Miller and Melton evaluated running styles and costumes as the runners passed the broadcast booth. Costumes ranged from Captain America, Darth Vader and a chicken to Superman and a sumo wrestler. In the lull between the runners and the next group — a group of Oregon Army National Guardsmen and a Bradley Fighting Vehicle — they waxed poetic about the Dress-Up Parade. “This the third largest parade in the state of Oregon,” Miller said. “This is a parade for anyone who ever wanted to be in a parade.” The two men can’t remember how many years they have provided commen- tary for the Dress-Up Parade. “I don’t know … we just show up,” Melton said. “At least 20.” The two obviously have chemistry, but they like each other in the way of Jack Lemmon and Walter Matthau in “Grumpy Old Men.” They sling well-timed insults at one another with inesse. “We don’t get along that well,” Melton said. “One day a year we can stand each other.” “It’s like a marriage,” Miller agreed. “Except we’re divorced for 364 days a year,” Melton said. Well, 363 days. The friends also commentate during Friday’s Westward Ho! Parade. Saturday morning, the two men met at the microphones about 45 minutes before the parade start and studied a cheat sheet of facts about each politician, business, band, club or royal court that would pass by. The commentators keep their silver tongues oiled with tiny sips of strong Hamley coffee (Melton) or pure water (Miller). They restrain the urge to drink more because there are no bathroom breaks. Along with the cheat sheet and the beverages, they also keep an umbrella handy. “When the Happy Canyon guys come by, they unload 10 pounds of candy at us,” Melton said. “The kids gather around us. This year, we brought an umbrella.” They admitted the massive volley of Tootsie Rolls is partly their fault. “We antagonize them by calling them a bunch of weeny arms,” Miller said. Miller said he treasures this annual gig that he said he originally got because he knew about horses. “I knew the difference between a paint and a pinto, a Percheron, a Clydesdale and a Belgian,” he said. The men seek to keep their low of banter politi- cally correct. “It’s got to be politically correct,” Melton said. “There’s no reason during this great event to talk poli- tics.” The inal entry passed about an hour after Miller and Melton had picked up their microphones. They signed off with the phrase every Pendletonian knows, “Let’er Buck” and the street went quiet. The Dress-Up Parade had oficially ended. ——— Contact Kathy Aney at kaney@eastoregonian.com or call 541-966-0810. Staff photo by Kathy Aney Staff photo by Kathy Aney Bob Miller and Tom Melton keep up a running banter Happy Canyon Princess Appollonia Saenz. during Saturday’s Dress-Up Parade in Pendleton. THURSDAY, SEPT. 15 th It is the 11th anniversary of “Tough Enough To Wear Pink” TM Day. The funds raised from this event will help local breast cancer patients both during and after cancer treatment. Staff photo by Kathy Aney Staff photo by Kathy Aney A horse of many colors walked Pendleton High School’s Rythmic Mode performs the route of Saturday’s Dress- during the Dress-Up Parade on Saturday in down- Up Parade in Pendleton. town Pendleton. Wear PINK Custom Montana Silversmiths Belt Buckle Raffle! Staff photo by Kathy Aney A member of the Pendleton Round-Up Mounted Band plays during the parade. Staff photo by Kathy Aney More photos online Staff photo by Kathy Aney A roller skater passes out A dog walks with the Hal’s Hamburgers menus Pendleton Pupcakes group during the parade. during the parade. Family Health & Fitness Day Custom Justin Boots Raffle! The Pendleton Round-Up Association Would Like to Thank the Following Sponsors Gold Sponsors Something for all ages! Saturday, September 24 9am-2pm Hermiston High School Silver Sponsor FREE EVENT! FREE health & wellness event for people of all ages featuring health screenings, activities, demonstrations and workshops. • Blood Pressure Checks • Colorectal Cancer Screening Kits • Vision/Hearing Examinations • Dental Screenings • BMI & Body Composition Analysis • Mental Health and Addiction Services • File of Life • Cholesterol Checks (8-10 Hour Fast) • Blood Glucose Level • SHIBA (Medicare), Oregon Health Plan, Veterans Information • Health-related Classes & Activities (Cooking Classes, Exercise, Etc) • Teddy Bear Clinic • Children's Developmental Screenings • Community Resource Referrals • Tobacco Cessation • Car Seat Clinic • Alcohol Addiction Resources Bronze Sponsors PENDLETON For more information: Good Shepherd Education Department: 541-667-3509 or healthinfo@gshealth.org Pink Sponsors
