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About East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current | View Entire Issue (April 1, 2015)
Wednesday, April 1, 2015 PEANUTS COFFEE BREAK East Oregonian Page 7A DEAR ABBY BY CHARLES M . SCHULZ Today is a day to celebrate biting gators and big tonsils FOR BETTER OR WORSE BY LYNN JOHNSTON B.C. BY JOHNNY HART PICKLES BY BRIAN CRANE Dear Readers: In honor of April the class roared. What do you think Fools’ Day, I’ll share a couple of off- about this? — George In South Car- beat letters I’ve received from readers olina who have attempted to pull my pro- Dear George: I think that unless verbial leg. Enjoy! her students pay more attention to Dear Abby: I’m writing to brag what she’s teaching and less to her about my boyfriend. He’s a semi-pro- chest, they may be earning double fessional alligator wrestler and super D’s. brave. It’s a tough job and it takes him And now ... back to work: Jeanne away from home a lot. It’s also a very Phillips Dear Abby: When does an extra- dangerous job. He often comes home marital affair actually start? Is it when Advice with bite marks all over his neck and the two parties involved do the mat- shoulders, and scratches on his back. WUHVV PDPER WKHLU ¿UVW NLVV RU LV LW Want to know something weird about alli- sooner? — Clueless Wife In Canada gators? Their natural odor smells a lot like Dear Clueless: A love affair involves more perfume. When my beau gets back from a than having sex. An extramarital affair begins WRXUQDPHQWKHRIWHQUHHNVRILW7KH¿UVWWLPH as soon as a man or woman starts sneaking I smelled it on him, I was worried. But after he around and lying to his or her mate. explained it to me, it made perfect sense. (Just Dear Abby: Please settle an argument my another one of life’s coincidences, I guess.) ex-husband and I still have. Over the course We’re so happy together. We have four of our marriage, we had problems. One night beautiful children, and he promises we’ll get we had a nasty spat, after which he moved out married soon — right after the next tourna- and never returned. He claims I should have ment. I know you get lots of letters about bad asked him to move back in. My response relationships, so I thought I’d let you hear has always been that he chose to leave, so I about a good one. — Gator Girl In Florida shouldn’t have had to beg him to come back. Dear Gator Girl: That’s a good one, all Your opinion, please? — Wondering In right. You may have thought you smelled per- Crystal Lake, Ill. fume, but I smell a rat. Be glad your boyfriend Dear Wondering: In my opinion, you and doesn’t wrestle cougars because I hear they your ex-husband should stop arguing because wear indelible lipstick. DIWHU\RXUGLYRUFHEHFDPH¿QDOWKHTXHVWLRQ Dear Abby: A teacher at our high school became moot. took some time off to get a breast augmenta- Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Bu- tion. Before she left, she told the class she was ren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was having her tonsils out. When she returned to founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. the classroom with a larger chest, one of the Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com students cracked, “Nice tonsils!” Of course, or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069. DAYS GONE BY BEETLE BAILEY GARFIELD BLONDIE BY MORT WALKER BY JIM DAVIS BY DEAN YOUNG AND STAN DRAKE 100 Years Ago From the East Oregonian April 1, 1915 “Two horses have already gone mad and been killed and I suppose others will die too.” The sentence is contained in a letter received this morning by Douglas Belts from his son, Berne Belts, who is running stock on the mid- dle fork of the John Day near Galena, relative to the rabies situation there. He tells of renting some pasture land to another man and it was this latter’s horses that developed madness and died. Before dying, he writes, they bit a half dozen other horses and he expects these to be- come rabid too. Likewise some of his own cat- tle which strayed into the pasture. This is only one of a number of recent reports coming from Grant county and the southern part of Umatilla county. Another story has it that a prominent rancher of the south end of the county has lost over 20 head of cattle by rabies, among them a valuable bull. 50 Years Ago From the East Oregonian April 1, 1965 Keep the present Highway 30 from Pend- OHWRQ WR 6WDQ¿HOG MXQFWLRQ DV D VHUYLFH URDG when a freeway is built, the Oregon Highway Department was told in a hearing here Tues- day. Witnesses were unanimous on that point. Umatilla County Judge D.R. Cook lead off the parade of 20 persons, mostly ranchers, who spoke up at the hearing in the courthouse. “The county will have to construct new roads to get grain to Echo or Rew elevator” if the highway is built to present plans, Judge Cook said. The state highway department has proposed con- struction to interstate standards of the present highway from Pendleton to the Morrow Coun- ty line. Two new lanes would be constructed north of the present highway from the county line to the Rohde ranch just east of the Lexing- ton-Echo cutoff, and two new lanes south of the present highway from there to Pendleton. Federal funds would bear 92 per cent of the cost. The present highway would be widened. 25 Years Ago From the East Oregonian April 1, 1990 Believe it or not, the famous chartreuse Main Street Cowboy calliope is in for a change, a big change — to the tune of more than $8,000. The cowboys determined the 40-year-old musical wagon was on its last legs, er, wheels. Dan Bell obtained it from a defunct Yakima carnival back in the 1950s. Since this is the 40th anniversary of the Main 6WUHHW &RZER\V WKH JURXS ¿JXUHG LW ZDV time to polish up their symbol. Helix resident Charlie McEachern, who’s tuned all sorts of organs since 1973 — from pipe to computer- L]HG²DFFHSWHGWKHGLI¿FXOWMRERIWXQLQJWKH untuned. And it wouldn’t be fair if the calliope ORRNHGVKDUSDQGWKHZDJRQÀDW7KHZDJRQ and all woodwork is being completely gone over, overhauled and rebuilt. THIS DAY IN HISTORY DILBERT THE WIZARD OF ID LUANN ZITS BY SCOTT ADAMS BY BRANT PARKER AND JOHNNY HART BY GREG EVANS BY JERRY SCOTT AND JIM BORGMAN Today is the 91st day of 2015. There are 274 days left in the year. This is April Fool’s Day. Today’s Highlight in History: On April 1, 1945, Amer- ican forces launched the amphibious invasion of Oki- nawa during World War II. (U.S. forces succeeded in capturing the Japanese island on June 22.) On this date: In 1789, the U.S. House of Representatives held its ¿UVW IXOO PHHWLQJ LQ 1HZ York; Frederick Muhlenberg of Pennsylvania was elected WKH¿UVW+RXVHVSHDNHU In 1815, Prussian/German statesman Otto von Bismarck was born in Schoenhausen. In 1865, during the Civil War, Union forces led by Maj. Gen. Philip Sheridan routed Confederate soldiers under the command of Maj. Gen. George Pickett in the Battle STONE SOUP BIG NATE of Five Forks in Virginia. In 1924, Adolf Hitler was VHQWHQFHG WR ¿YH \HDUV LQ prison for his role in the Beer Hall Putsch in Munich. (Hit- ler was released in Dec. 1924; during his time behind bars, he wrote his autobiographical screed, “Mein Kampf.”) In 1933, Nazi Germany staged a daylong national boycott of Jewish-owned businesses. In 1954, the United States Air Force Academy was established by President Dwight D. Eisenhower. In 1962, the Katherine Anne Porter novel “Ship of Fools,” an allegory about the rise of Nazism in Germa- ny, was published by Little, Brown & Co. on April Fool’s Day. In 1970, President Richard M. Nixon signed a measure banning cigarette advertising on radio and television, to take effect after Jan. 1, 1971. In 1984, recording star Marvin Gaye was shot to death by his father, Marvin Gay Sr., in Los Angeles, the day before his 45th birthday. Today’s Birthdays: Ac- tress Jane Powell is 86. Ac- tress Grace Lee Whitney is 85. Actress Debbie Reynolds is 83. Country singer Jim Ed Brown is 81. Actor Don Hastings is 81. Baseball Hall of Famer Phil Niekro is 76. Actress Ali MacGraw is 76. Rhythm-and-blues singer Rudolph Isley is 76. Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito is 65. Rapper-actor Method Man is 44. Political com- mentator Rachel Maddow is 42. Comedian-actor Taran Killam is 33. Country singer Hillary Scott (Lady Antebel- lum) is 29. Thought for Today: “The only sin is mediocrity.” — Martha Graham, American modern dance pioneer (born 1894, died this date in 1991). BY JAN ELLIOT BY LINCOLN PEIRCE
