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About The Oregon daily journal. (Portland, Or.) 1902-1972 | View Entire Issue (July 29, 1906)
."- THE OIJECON SUNDAY1" JCUr-NAL. PORTLAND. SUNDAY i:0IIING, JULY 3, - ' ... ' rC'dwseAtish' a- Alsslaa tase. el a. M North Rampart Itmfc nil da. I Mt Ciaaoy. whose I bad ,' , Jr. Mot Man la months. Clancy la -..a .Amvlota. with -aa Irish dlstheels and cosmopolitan proclivities. Many builMMM have claimed him. but bob for low.. TWrnllUfi Mood U He greeted mo with heartiness, and . X thought I jt something In hta or that ooafet-CO bo-aivvlr. SoaaeUn 4 whoa Clancy baa returned from . his ' voyage Into ' the Informal and the gregtoua, ho can bo persuaded to oral oanatruotio, . Mow I thought I caw- ta . him symptom of voluntary - discourse, s I hastily convoyed him to a llttlo . oaf near by, wharo a fan bussed, mtti- gating tho torrid aftrlaoM of the Kow Orlaana umme- - v ' . ''".''.'" I"TU Tory noai too troptoa, thla ; weather, today., said ' Clancy apropos '. I thouaht of th season. B tt ap peared, tt had moro to do with hi . atory. X nodded eonflrmatorlly, - ' Tm f- olegant t waathor," - continued Ctancr. "for filibustering- " Tls what I"v boon doln' for 4w ' most ha put, axnunrlla' ta liberate a forelan aeonle from y tyrant's clutch, 'Tvu hard work. ?Tt strainta' toth back and row corns on your .hand'. "S. I said, "you'vs turned aoldler ot fortune lar earnest , J hopo yoa mada tt pay. To what oouatry did yoa land ywur aldf - " - -' (' "- "Wherea Xamchatkar, naked Clan ay. Irrelevantly, I thought -"Why, oft Slbsria, bp la tho Arctic Mgtasa, ,1 believe," I aaawered, lonf what doubtfully. , '- .-.-' "X thought that was tho eold tea. "J Hid Cumoy. with a. nod. . Tr. eJwaye awttta tho 'two nam as mixed. Twi Goatem, than tho hot on Iv boo fUlbostaria' wit. TCU find that oown try oa tho map. - Tls la tho district known aa tho tropica. By tho foresight ad prorldanoo, It llaa oa tho eoast a tho awugiaphy maa could run tho name of tho towns off into tho water. . Tbayro aa baea long, a mall typo, eampaaad of Spanish dlaloets. and-.tla my oplnloo of th oama ayatosa of ayataa that blow vs tho htalno. Taa, Hwaa that ooaatrr X oallod aaainat. alnvlo-haadod. aad ow doarorod to Ubarat It from a tyrannical ovontmont with a ataflo-barrolod pleh ac. vanadoi at that . Ta don't adar otaad, of oooroa. 'Tls a atatamaat do aiaadta aluaUUtlOn and apologioa. "Twaa oao mornlnr aboat tho first of Jnno; I was atandlD down oa tho wharf, look to about at tho ships la tho rrrar. - Thar was a uiua ftaamor moorad right Op po alto mo that saamad aheat roady to oalL Tho fuaaals of It won throw la' out amoko. aad a aa rooatabonta woro oarryln' aboard a pllo of boaaa that waa a tack ad p oa tha wharf. Tho boaos woro aboat two foot oquaro, and soraathln' llks four foot hwr and thav aaamail ta ba wrattv boayy. r T walkad erar, earalaoa. ta tho ataok of boaaa. X saw ono of thorn bad boom brokoa ta handlla'. Twaa ourtoatty uado ma poll up tho loooo top aad look lamdo. Tho box waa paekod full of Wlaehoatar rlfloa.. So, so,'' say a I to nyaolf : aomobodya aottta' a twist oa tho aoutrallty laws.- tomabodya atdla' with mualtloao of war. .. X woador. whoro 1 board somebody -sough, aad X tarnod . around. Thoro stood a little, round, fat man with a brown faeo and whlto olotboa, a flrst-elasa looking little man. with a fouroarat diamond oa hi ftngor and hla era fall of tnterrontlona aad- rospaeta.1 Mdgad ho was a kind o taiwifuwv aaaypo rrom . Jiusaia or Japaa or tho archipelagoes.. ."Hlstr aaya tho round man, full of eoaooalmonta and confidence "Will tha aoaor reapoat tho dlaoorarynants ba haa mada, that tho mans oa tho ahlp ban not bo acquaint? Tho aoaor will bo a gontlomaa thai shall not expose oao thiag that by accident oocvir.' laonsoor.' aaya I for X Judged hla to bo a kind of frenchman, that aa oortmoat of forolgnora being doomed by nature to politeness aad dialects re earoa air aaoat exasperated eeouranoee hat your aoerot la safe with . James Clancy. Farthormoro, X will go so far aa to remark. Veer la Liberty Tee? H good and strong. Whenever you hoar of a Clancy obstructla' tho abolishment of exlstla' gorernmaata you may notify om by rotura mall' "The eeaor U good,' say tho dark, fat mas, a Ilia' under his black mna taebo. "Wish you to oomo aboard my ahlB and arlak af a win a alaaaw "Bala' a Clancy,, ta two mlrfutes ma aad tho foroiga maa wars aoatod at a table ta tho oabla of tha ateamar with a bottle betwoea ua, I aould hoar tha hoary boxee bela dumptd tat tho hold. X Judged that eargo must aonalst of at least t,tO 7lnshostaTa. Mo and tha browa maa drank tha bottle of stuff, aad ho called tho steward to bring an uthor. Whca yoa amalgamsto a Clancy with tho eon ten ta of a bottle you prac tically Instigate socoosfoa. X bad heard a good deal about these rarolutlons la them tropical climates, and I began to want a hand In It. . Ton gotn' to stir things up In your country, ain't you, monaoerr says I with a wink to 1st him kaow I waa on. "Tea. yoa,' says the little man, pounding his flats oa tha table. 'A ehaago ot tho greatest will occur. Too long have the people booa oppressed with tho promises and (ha neTtr-to-happen things to boooma. Tha great work It shall bo carry on. Tea. Oar forces ah all la the capital city strike of the soonest. Carramboor , " Carrambos Is tbs word.' says X. be ginning to Invest myself with enthusi asms and - more wine, 'likewise, veer, as I said before. May the shamrock f old I mean the banana viae or the pie plant,' or whatever the Imperial ambleta may bo of your down-trodden oouatry. wave forever.' " "A thousand thank-yous,' aaya tho round man. for your omission of amic able utterances. What our cause needs of tho rery most la mans who will tha work do, to lift It along. Oh, for one thousands strong, good mans to aid tba General Do Vega that ho snail ta his eountr bring those suooess and glory) It to bard oh, so hard to find good man ta help In tho work.' - Moosaer.' aaya I. leanln' oyer the table ' and graspln' hla hand. 1 don't know wharo your country la, but mo heart , blooda for it. The heart of a Clancy waa never -deaf to the sight of an oppressed paopia Tha family 4m. tM bnataroro by . birth, and foreigners by trad a If yoa can use Jamee Clancy arm aad bla blood la denudln' your shores of tho tyrant'a yoke they're yours to command.' . - . X)noral Do Vega waa wrorcome with 1mt to eoaflaeata my condolence of his conspiracies aad predicaments. He tried ta embrace mo serosa tho table, but kia fatness, and tha wins that waa not la tho bottles, prevented. Thus waa X welcomed trite tho ranks of flllbua tery. Then the general maa told me bis oouatry bad tho name of Oust em a la, aad waa tho greatest nation laved by any ocean whatever,- anywharc lie looked at mo with tears la hla eyes, and from time to time ho would omit the remark, 'Ah! big, strong, brave mans! That Is what my country need.' . "Oenaral Xo Vega,' as was'ths name by which he denounced himself, brought out a document for mo ta sign, which I did, makin' a fine flourish and surlyaue with' tha tail of tho ' Tour paasago money,' says tha gen eral; businesslike, baU from your pay i deduct.'- . - : ., . 'i : ""TwiU not,' aaya X. baugnty. TH pay ny own paseage.' A hundred and eighty dollara X had In my Inside pocket, aad 'twaa no common filibuster I waa gola to bo, filibuster!!)' for ma board aad cloths,' , : ... - ... . ... "Tba ateamar waa to saO la two hours, and X wsnt ashore to got oomo things toaether I'd need. 'When I-came aboard I ehowed rha , geotrai, with pride, , tho a? AoahTad!! fP'ii-V.I 7,rAhJ!l'!?P-?"f,! muffs, with elegant fleeoe-tlned gloves and. woolen muffler, i . '.' . " Varrambool' aaya tho little general 'What clothes are these that shall go to tho tropler And than tho little spal peen laughs, and bo ealla tha captain. and the captain calls ths purser, and they plpo up the chief engineer, and ths whole gang leans against tha cabin and laughad t Clancy's wardrobe for Guate mala. '-., "I re f! acta a bit, serious, and aska the general again to dominate tha terms by which bla country la called. ,He tolls mo, and I sec than that twaa tha t'other one, Kamchatka, I had la mind. Since then I've had difficulty ta aoparatln' tho two aationa la aamo, climate and geographic disposition. "I paid my passage - lit, flret aabla ata at tanie win th officer d. Dow a on th lower dock was a gang of aoooad-olass passengers, about 4 of taam, seemla' to bo Dagoes and tha Ilk. X wondered what a many of taont ware goln along for. "Well, than., la -three aaya ws sailed alongside that Ouatemala, .Twas a bin oouatry, and not yellow, aa 'tis mls oolorod on th map. We landed at a town aa th coast where a train of care waa waitla' for a dinky little railroad. Th bone an th steamer .war brought ashor and loaded oat th care. The gang of Dagoes got aboard, too. the general and mo In tho front car. Tea, ma aad Oeaoral Do Voga headed the revolution, as It pulled out of the sea port town. That train traveled about as faat as a policeman goln" to a riot. It psnstrated too moot conspicuous lot f fussy scenery oyer seen out aide a geog raphy. Wo run aonfa to miles In seren hours aad the ' train stopped. - There waa no more railroad. Twaa a sort of camp In a damp gorge full Of .wlldnese aad melancholies. They wss gredln' and ehoppln' out the forests ahead to continue th - road. Hare.' says I To myself. Is th romantic haunt of the revolutlonlsta - Hero will Clancy, by tho virtue that la in. a superior race, strike a tremendous blow for liberty.' "Thar unloaded r the bozos from ths train And begun to knock th top off. Prom tho first ono that was opened I saw General D Vega take tho Win chester rifles and pass them around to a scmsd of morbid, sore-toed soldiery. Th other bozo were opened neat, and. believe me or not. divii another goa waa to be seen. Every ether box m the lot wss full of pickax aa and spsdas. 'And then orrow be upon them tropics the proud Clancy and tho dis honored Dagoes, each; one of them, bad t ahoulder .a pick or a spade, and march away to work oa that dirty little railroad, Tes: 'tweav that th ruiiras- terln Clancy signed for, though unbw knownst to himself at the time. In after daya I found out about it It seem 'twaa hard to gat hands to work on that road. Th Intelligent natives of the country was too lasy to work. Indeed,, the saint kno W.'twas .unnecea. aary.' 6y stretchln' out ono hand, they could seise the most delicate -sad costly fruits of th earth, and, by strstchta out the other, tbey could sloop for day at a time without heertn a T o'clock whistle or tha footstepe of tho rent man upoa th stair. - Bo,-regular, the a taam era traveled ' the United states to a educe labor. Usually ths 'Imported "spade allnger died In two or thro months from-eatln' the over-rip water land breatbln' the violent tropical scenery. Wherefore, they made them alga con tract for a year when they hired them, and put an armed guard ever th poor devils to keep them from runnln' away. "'Twas thus I was double-crossed by the tropica through a family fallla of gola ;out ot tha way to hunt disturb ances. . ' "They gave me a pick, and I took It, medlmtln'aa Insurrection en the spot; but there was fb guards nandUa' th '; .- :'?';- Tha Box Wag Packed Winchester ear lass, and X oom to th conclusion that discretion waa th beat part of f Ulbaatorta'. . Thar waa about ltt f us ta th gang a tar tin out to work, and tha word waa glvea to move. X atopa oat of th ranka and toe up to that General Da Vega man, who waa smokln a elgar and gaaln' upon . tho scene with aatlaf aationa and glory. He amlle at at polite and davlllsn. "Plenty work,-aayg ba, for big, strong inaaa in Guatemala. Tea. . Tirty dollar In- the month. Good pay. Ah, ye. Ton strong, brave man, Bimaby wo push thoao rail road la th capital very quick, Tbey want you g work w, Adlosjtroug " -Mrs X, Unirrtn you n a poor little Irish man thiar - Wbsa mana. I sot foot aa your oockroashy ateamar, and breathed liberal ana revolutionary aentlmoato Into your our' wine, did you think I waa aonaptrla' to sling a pick your ooatomptuou Uttl railroad T And when yoa anaworod mo with patri otic roottatlona, humping ap th star spangled oauso of liberty, did yoa bar meditation of rodueta me to tho ranks of th tump-grubbta - Dagssa ta th chain gangs f your Vila and groveiln' ountryr . , . "The ganeral maa expanded hla ro tundity aad laughed eonsldsrabl. Tea, ho laughed very long and loud, and I. Clancy, stood snd waited. . - Comloal maasr ho ahouta, at last "Bo you wnl kill m front th laughing. Tesi U la bard to find th bravo, at rang mana to aid asy country. Revolutions? Did X apeak of r-r-revolutlonaT . Mot en ward. X aay, big. strong man la seed la Guatemala. . Tha aniatske la f yoa. Ton have looked In those on box obtaining' thoao gun for tho guard. Ton think all boxes la contain guat tNr ao. There I not war In Ouatemala, But work Tea. Good. Ttrty dollar in th month. Ton shall shoulder on pickax, eenor, and dig for th liberty and prosperity ef Guatemala. Off to your work, Th guard wait for you.'' " Tittle, fat, poodl dog of a brawn man,' says I, quiet, but full of indigna tions and discomforts, thing shall hap pen to you. . Maybe not right away, but aa soon aa J. Clancy oaa formulate somethln' la th way of repartee.' "The boos of the gang orders u to work. I tramp off with th Guinea, and I bears th distinguished -patriot aad kidnaper laughln. hearty, as w go. "Tls a worrowful fact, for eight week I built railroads for that misbe bavln country. I filibustered 11 hours a day with a heavy pick and a spade, ehoppln' away th luxurious landscape that grow upon th right of way. Wo worked In swamps that am ailed llks there waa a leak In tho gas mains, trampln' down a fine assortment of the most expensive hothouse plant and vegetable. Th seen was tropical be yond tho wildcat Imagination of th geography man. Tho tree waa all sky scrapers; th underbrush was full of needle and pins: there waa monkeys Jompln around and crocodile and pink tailed mockin' birds, and y stood knse deep ta the rotten water and . grabbled roots for th liberation of Guatemala. Of night w would build emudgas In camp to discourage tho mosquito, and alt In tha amoko, wttw tho guards pacln' all around a . Thar waa too men workin' ' on tho road mostly . Guineas, nigger-men. Spanlsh-msn - and. wades. Three or four wer Irish. "On old man named Halloran a man of Hibernian entitlements and discre tions, explained It to ma H bad been workin' on the road a year. Most or them died In loo than six month He wss rll up to gTtotW an bor;.aniI shook with chills every third night "When you first come,' says he, yc think yCll leave right away. But they hold out your first month's pay for your passsgo over, and by that time th trop ics haa Ita grip on y. Te're surround ed by a rat-in' forest full of dlsreputahio beasts lions and baboon and anacon da wattln' to devour ye. - The sun strike y hard and melt th marrow la your, bone To get similar to ths Uttuoe-caters the poetry book sposks about.' ' To forget th elevated alntt menu of life, aueh aa patriotism, re venge, disturbance ef th peace and th dadnt love of a clone shirt- To do your work, and ye swallow ths kerosene II and rubber plpestems-dlshod np to ye by th Dag cook for food. T Jtght your pipeful and say to yourself. "Nlxt week I'll break away," and y go to sleep and call ysrallf a liar, for ya know ye u never a it. Full of Wlnchastgr Rlfloa. "Who Is thl general maa.' asks I thai ealla almsolf D Vegar "Tie th man,' aaya HaMoraa, wa la try-In to eomplst th nnlshln' ot th railroad. Twaa tho project of a private corporation, but It buated. and then ths government took it up. Do Vagy la a big politician and. wants to b president Tha people want ths railroad completed, as they're taxed mighty on account f It Th Do Yegy man la pushln' It along a a cam palga. move.' ' 'Tls not my way, aaya X, to make threats against any man. but there's an account to -bo aattlod betwoea the rail road man and James CDowd Clancy.' -Two that way I thought, meellf. t Brtt, Halloran aaya. with a big alga, until I got to bo a lettuce-eater. Th fault's wtd these tropica. They rejuleee a man's aystsm. Tls a land, a th poet says, '"where It always seem to be after dinner." I doe m work and smokes as pip and sleep. Thsra's lit Ito else la life, anyway. Tell get that way yerseM, mighty soon. . .Don't be harborin' any stntlmonta at alt, Clancy.' 1 can't help it,' any X. Tn full of 'am. I enlisted In the revolutionary army of thla dark country in good faith to light for Its liberty, honor and silver candlesticks; Instead of which I am set to am pu tat In' Its scenery aad grubbia' Ita roots. Tie th general man will have to pay for It Two month X worked that rail road before I found a ehaaoe to get away. One day a gang of u waa sent back to the end of th completed Mn to fetch some picks that bad been sent down- to Port Bar r loo to be sharpened. Tbey wer brought oa a handcar and I noticed, whs we started away, that the ear was left on the track. That night, about If, I woke ap B toran and told him my schema. .. . " 'Run awayr aaya Halloran. Good Lord. Clancy,' do yo moan rtf Why, 1 ain't got tho aarve. It's too ohtlly, and I ain't slept enough. Bun swart . I told you. Clancy, I've -eat the lettuce. I've loot my grip. . Tt th tropic that's done it 'Tls Ilka th poet say! "jror. gottoa ar sur friends that we have left behind; ta the hollow Httuce-iand - we will 11 v and Uy reclined." Ton better goa on. Clancy, ru stay, I guess. Ire too early and cold, and rm sleepy.' I had to - leave Halloran. I dressed quiet and sltppsd out Of tho tent wo wer in. When th guard oama along I knocked him over, like a nlne pln. with a green ooeoanut I had, and made for the railroad. X got on that handcar and mada It fly. Twaa yst a while before daybreak whoa I saw the llghta ef Port Barrloo about a mile away. X stopped the' handcar there and walked to the town. I stepped Inslds ths corporations of that town with cars and hesitation I was not afraid of the army of Guatemala, but my aoul quaked t the proepcet of a hand-to-hand strug gle with its wmployment bureau. Tls a country, that hire It help easy and. keep 'em long. Sure, X can fancy Missis America and Missis Guatemala pa sain' a bit of gossip soms fin, still night acres th mountains." Ob, dear,' say Misala America, and It's a lot of trouble I'm bavin' agla with th help, senora, ma'am.' Taws, nowT - nays Missis Guatemala. you - don't aay mo, ma'am! Now, mine never think of leavln' mo t-he! ma'am,', snickers Missis Guatemala. " . T was wonderin' how 1 was goln' to tnov away from them tropica without bain hired again. Dark a It was. I could see a steamer lid In' in tho har bor, with tho smoke smsrgtn' from her stacks, I turned- down- a-tlttla grassy street that run down to th water. On the beach I found a llttlo brown nigger man Just about to ahovs off In a akin. " "Hold on. Bam bo," aaya I, 'savvy XffngltahT ' " 'Heap plenty, yes,' aays h, with a pleasant grin,.., " 'What ateamar Is thatr t aska him, "snd where I it going And what' the news, and th good word, aad tha tint of dayr . " That steamer th Conchlta,' said ths brown man, affable and easy, rollln a cigarette. - "Him come from New Or laana for load banana. , Him got looj last night I think him sail in one, two hour, Vorre nl-re day wo shall b goln' have. Ton hear soma talkee 'bout big battle, maybe so. Ton think catenae General Da Vega, ssnorT Tssf Nor "How that. Ham bo r say X. "Big battle? What battle? Who wants ea tehee Oenaral Do Vega? I've been up at my gold mlnae la tba Interior for spl tt men tha snd haven't hear aay awn.' -r. " Ob,' aaya th nigger-man, proud to apeak the Eagllah, vorreo great revolu tion in "Guatemala on week ng. , Gen eral D Vega, him try be president Him raw .arise one Cl ten": thousand mana for fight at th government Those govammeat n4 f l ve forty oner bun drod thousand soldier to suppress revo lution. They fight big battle yesterday at Lomagrande that about nineteen or fifty mile tn tho mountain. That gov ernment aoldler whaep General D Vega oh. most . bad, give - hundred nine hundred two thousand of bla man la kllL That revolution I smash feuppraas bust very quick. General D Vega, him r-r-run away fast on ana big mule. Tea, sarrambos! - Th general, him r-r-run away, ' and hla armee la kill. That government aoldler, they try find General D Vega vsrre much. - They want ea tehee him for a hoot Ton think they catch that general, senorr "Saints grant tt;' say L "Twould ba ths Judgmsnt of Providence for aottia' the wsrlik talent of a Clancy to gradln' the tropica with a pick aad shovel. But 'tls not so much, a question of Insur rections, now. aa Uttl man, a 'tls of tho hired-man problem. Tls anxious X am ta resign a situation of responsi bility and trust with th Whit wings department of your grant, and degraded country. Bow mo in your llttlo boat out ts that steamer and I'll glv y five dollar sinker pacers sinker aeoors.' aay I. raducta tn offer t the language aad denomination of tba tropic dialects, - Cinoo peso,' repeat th little man Tlv doilee, yon girar . -, T "Twaa not euch a bad Uttl ata a. Ha had hosiutlon at first sayln that Ps angra leavln1 tb eoustry had to have pa pars and passports, but at last h took m out alongald th ateamar. Day' waa Just break In' a w struck bar. snd there wass't a soul to b bean on board. Tb water waa very still, and tb Bigger-man gav at a lift from th boat and I al Imbed ant th eteamer wher her ld waa sliced to th dok for loadln .fruit The hatch WVe pea and I looked down and saw tha ears of bananaa that filled th bold to wtthla alx feet f th top. I thinks to myself. Clancy, you better a a a stowaway, it's safer. Th steamer men might hand yon back to th employment bureau. The tropica '11 get you. Clancy, tt yoa don't watch, out' "to I Jumps dewa easy among th bananas, and digs eat a hoi to hid tn, among tha bunch. In aa hour or so I sould hear tb angina goln', and feel ths steamer roekin', aad I knew we were off to sea. They left th hatches open for ventilation, and pretty soon It was light enough la tho hold to so fairly well. I got to feeiin' a bit hun gry, and thought I'd have a light fruit lunch, by way of rsfreshment I crccped out of th hole I'd mada aad stood up straight Just then I saw another maa crawl up about tea feet away and reach out and skin a banana and stuff It Into his tnouth. Twaa a dirty man. black faced and ragged- and disgraceful of aspect Tea. th maa was a ringer for th picture of ths fat Weary Willis ta th funny paper. I looked again, and saw K was my general man Da Vega, th great revolutionist, mule rider and pickax importer. When he saw mo ths general heeiuted with his mouth filled with banana and hla eyas the else of cocoanuts. Hlst!' I say , "Not a word, of they'll put us off and msh u wslk. "Vsev la LlrytH V; .J-s.-fjnPiTr the sentiment by shovia' a banana Into the source of It I waa car U in th gen eral wouldn't recognise me. Th ne farious 'Work of th tropica had left me iookln' different There waa half aa Inch of roaa whiskers coverln my far, and my costume wss a pair of blue overall and a red shirt " ' "How you som la th ahlp, aenorr asked tha general aa soon aa be could apeak.-. ...... ""By tha back door whist!' say I. "Twos a glorious blow for liberty we struck,' rcontlnuca "but w was over powered by numbers. Let us eeoept our defeat like brave men and sat another bensn.' ., ' ' " "Were y tn th cause of liberty fish tin', aenorf say a th general, shed din leers on the cargo. ' " To the last.' says I. Twa t led the last desperate charge -against ths minions of tha tyrant But It mad them mad, and we waa forced to re treat 'Twaa I, general, procured the mule upoa wnlok you Moaped, Could yo gly that rip buaah a Uttl beoat thla way. general T It's a bit out of my reach. Thank.' -"Say you ap, brave patriot f said th general, again weapin v- 'Ah. uioal And 1 hava not of ths means to reward your devotion. Barely did . I my 'life bring away.. Carrara bos! what -a devil's animal waa that mule, eenor! ' Llka ships lit ons storm was X dashed about Th skin of myslf was ripped away with th. thorn snd via Upa tae bark of a hundred tree did that beast of the Infernal bump, and cause out rage to the leg of mine. - In tho night to Fort Barrio I cSmot I dlsposaas an yea If of that mountain of mui and hasten along th water shor. - I find a little boat to be tied. t launch myself and row to the steamer. I cannot see any mans on board, so I climb on rope which bang at th stds. I than myself hid In th banana ' Surely, I say, if th ship . captains view me, they shall throw mo- again to .those Guatemala. Those thing are not good, 'Guatemala wui enooi uenerai . U vega, rnere fore X am hid and remain silent Life Itself 1 glorious. Liberty. It la pretty good; but o good aa life . I do not think,' ' ;.?. ' .. ,x ' . "Three daya. as I said, was th trip t New Orleans. Ths general man and m got to bo cronies of th deepest, dye. Bananaa we at until they were dis tasteful to tha sight and aa eyeeore to the palate, but to bananaa alon waa th bill of faro reduced. , At night- I crawls out. careful, oa the lower deck. and gets a bucket .of fresh water. That General D Vaxa was a man Inhabited by aa engorgement of word ana sentence. He added to the mo notony or th voyage by dlveetln hlm eiT ox conversation. Ha believed I waa a revolutioniat of hla own party, there beln", aa ha- told me. a good many Amer ican ana other xorelanere In Ita ranka Twaa a braggart and a conceited little gabbler it was, though ha considered himself a hero. : Twaa oa himself he waatsd all his regrets at th failln' of hi plot Not a word did tho little balloon have to nay about - th ether missehavln' Idiots-that bad been shot or run themselves ta death ia hla revo lution, .... .;.; ... "Tb second day out hit was feeiin' pretty braggy and uppish for a atowed away conspirator that owed bla xist. a nee to a mule and atolen bananaa He waa tallln m about the great railroad be bad been buildlnV and ha relate what he call a cam la Incident about a fool Irishman h Inveigled from New Orleana to alias a pick on hla little morgue of a narrow-gauge Una. Twa aorrowful to hear th little, dirty, gen eral tell tb opprobrtou atory of how he put salt upon tho tall of that reckless nd sUly bird. Clancy. Laugh, h did. hearty and long. He shook with laugh la, th black-faced rebel and- out oast stand in' neck-deep la banana, without friends or country. -. . 'Ah.' senor." b snickers. ' to " the death would you have laughed t that drollest Irish, I say to him: "Strong big mana la need very much tn -Guatemala.' , T will blow stiik for your down-pisssod country.--ha ay,'That shall yoa do." I toll him, - Aht ft was an' Irish so comic. He see one box break upon the wharf that contain for the guard a few, gun... H think there la gun In all th box. - Bat that ta all pickax.' Tea. Ah! eenor. could you tb face of that Irish have see when they set mm to tn worgr.). t "Twa thus tb x-bca of the em ployment bureau . contributed to . the tedium ot tho trip with merry Jest an anecdote. ' But now and then, bs would weep upon tb bananas and make ora, tlon about the, lost causa of liberty and the mule. ... . ... .. "Twa a pleasant sound whew th steamer bumped against the pier In New Orleana. Pretty soon ws beard th nat- a-pat of hundred of bar feet. 'and th Dago gang that unloads ths fruit Jumped on th deck and down Into th bold. .-. Me and th general worked a while at paaaln up th bunches, and tbey thought wo were part of tho gang. After about half an hour w managed to slip off th ateamar onto th wharf., . "Twaa a great honor on tha hand of aa obaour Clancy, bavin tha.entar talnment of the representative of a great foreign flllbustertn' power. I first bought for th general and myself many long drfnks and thing to eat that were not banana . The general man trotted HOW TO WOO MORPHEUS . H ..."' i-;" HAT la aleept What Induce . It and what I tb special agency concerned In tb re cuperative " prooeeeT Al though the have been burning ques tions for a gee never wer they a truly vital ' they are now when the de mand oa our time are oftea ao great that sleep doe not only rank aa a sec ondary consideration but 1 often cut cut altogether for the night In fsot th demand for more eonsctousnes for busy folks now stolen from nature in cur Ignoranc aa regard a suitable method ef recompensatton baa de veloped something no less surprising than a demand for artificial sleep, or moan to- recuperate th Jaded f Se attle by som process mr rapid than th present snail-like rat of revltallsa tlon, aay th Mew Tork World. Tears ago, by a almpl experiment and a proceed open to the moat aaetent of thinkers, th writer chanced to stumble upon th long-sought key 'to dreamland. No other appliances than those provided by nature herself wer used, although what success or effect there waa was dependent on certain electrical properties of th living body formerly surmised but little understood. ' Perhaps this vlto-oleetrtcal condition may bo explained by the famous kite experiment of Franklin more thsn a century ago. Ha supposed tht light ning ws caused by the pent-up elec tricity In the elouda which had risen to such high potential that It dlschsrgsd sbruptly Into the earth. Forthwith he .sent up a line to tap these cloud and aa all ef us know a continuous stream of electricity cam forth. Th relation of th head to th body la much the same as th electrified cloud to th .ngatlva-artv. ad-iated-f ending up a kit lina w very simply rata up th hand and put it on th bead. Although nature apared no pains to thoroughly confine the aubtla energy charge In the brain, the fact rematna that whan limb connection la mada with tha more negative body there Is at once leakage. The electrical charg la th brain gathers towsrd ths area touched In gentle stream and thus It finds IU way down through th arm and thence to b absorbed by ths body. As fsr bark SB ItJI Noblll detected these currents end measured them. They ar known s msn-currenta. but for acme reason tbey hav never been Investigated or applied until now. It Is these gentle, quite Imperceptible enough men-currants which by flowing 'in a certain way in tha nervous system constitute th special agency upon which bTaln recuperation depends during sleep. Sleep sonslsts of thee currente; am theee current a re sleep, and It I not dependent on the blood ss formerly sup posed, and henee our ability t aug ment r retard its prsoesa. Th phJUV W along at my tdda. leavln all tk r raneemeata to ma I lei him up to Lafayette aqusr. a t a t on .a bench in the little park, 'C'.reUee I hsd bought for hire, and ho. humped himself down on the seat like a little, fat, contented hobo. I look him over ae he sets there,, and what see pleases me. Browa by nature and instinct hs Is now brindled with dirt and dust Praise to the mule, his clothes is mostly string-and flap. Tee. th look f th general man la agreeable tax Clancy. . "I asks, him, delicate, if, by any chance, h brought wy anybody' money with hint from Guatemala.- He sighs nd bump his shoulders against th bench. - Not , a . cent All right Maybe, Be tellU me. soma of hla. friends In th troplo outfit- will send him funds later. The general was a clear a cass of no visible mean as I aver saw.,. "I told htra not to raov front th bench, and than I went up to th cor ner of Poydra and" Carondelot Along there I O tiara's beat v In Bv min ute along comes. OHara, a big. fine man, red-faced, with shlatn' buttons, swlngtn' hla club; 'Twould be fine thing- for. Ouatemala to movw Into O'Hare's precinct Twould bo a fine bit of recreation or Danny t suppress revolutions and uprlsln's one or twice a weak with hi club. - ! "I I04t workin' yt, .Danny r aaya L walkin' up to hint -. "Ovortlm.' aaya OHarra. Iookln' over me suspicious.. -Wnt soms of Itr "Fifty-forty-alx s th celebrated city ordinance suthorlxin' arrest conviction and imprisonment of peraona that suc ceed In . conccalln' .th.aif' thr crime from th police, . , . , ; '- 'Don't ' y ' know "Jimmy Clancy T say L T pink-gill ad monster!' Bo, when O'Hsr recognised m beneath ' th scandalous exterior bestowed, upon m by th tropica, I backed bint Into a doorway, and told him -what I wanted and why 'I wanted It 'All right, Jimmy.' i aaya O Hara. 'Go back and bold th bench. .; i b along la ten minute . , Ta that tim OTIar strolled through Lafayette Squar and spied two Weary Willies disgrsctn' on of th benchea la .ten minute more I. Clancy and Gen oral D Vega, late candidate for the presidency of Guatemala, waa tn ' ths statlon-hous. The general . I badly frightened and ealla upon m to pro claim hi distingulshmenta and rank. .; " Th man." says I t ; th police. "used ta be a railroad man. ' He's n the bum now. Tt a littl bughoaa. hs is, on aoconnt of losln' his Job," " "Carramboaf aaya th general, fls- aln Ilk a UtU soda-water fountain! you fought senor, with my force a in my native country. Why do you say th lie? Ton ehau aay I ana tha Oen- ral Do Vega, n soldier, on cabal- " "Rail road ar,' says L again. On the hog. - No good. Been llvln" for three day an atolen banana Look at htm. Ain't that enough T ' Twenty-rive dollar, or so day a, waa what tha recorder gav th general. Ha didn't hav a oeot, ao he. took the time. They let- m go, aa I knew they would,. for X had money to ahow. and O'Hara knew e. nixty day. - Twaa Juat ao long I slung pick for th great country of Kam of Ouatemala." - Clancy Dfttteed. There was a look of happy content on his deeply sunburned . race. "Would you Juet atop around th cor-"" nor a minute with me 7" he asked. Tt ' ye don't mind, I'll walk with y there, ' and show ye Exhibit A. I go around , thor myself every 1 minute to look at It and tho time' about up now." . . I walked with him to the corner of TJnblino and down th atreet a-llttla way. A gang of me . under guard from ; -tha parish prison waa at work cleaning th very rubblahy atreet thue working -cut the fine they, were unable to pay Otherwise. ... .. . ;... Clancy stopped mc on the eldewalk ' opposlts a little, rotund.-dark-featured maa of foreign , aspect, who was strug gling feverishly with a heavy Iron rake. The beat wss almost tropical, and th littl man showed vaat area ef damp- ' noes through hie tattered clothe. "Hy. moneeorl" caned Clancy. eharply. The little man looked up and scowled darkly. "Tat strong mana." shouted Clancy, chaerily. "Is needed in " ix ew orieans. - Tea to carry on tns good work, ' Carrambos! . ' Erin ' go braghr . . ... oaophy at Bleep and Its control Is ao ' estanstve that nothing short of a book could elucidate tho whole, although there Is much algniflsno la th fsct that un it k ordinary electricity, vital energy, whll very subtle. Is ponderable t a. It Is a material fluid. If aa electrical cur- ' rent wer passed through th head It might affect th nerve, bee us thsy r sentient: but no chant would result a during sleep or when the bends ar applied and when tb ponderable our- . rent f Iowa. i ' . ' -' . In a measure Sleep may defined aa a pbamanoa do to the flow of nerve energy from the body to th head, while eonsclousnss for the moat part la du to a rovers condition 4. ., ft flows from th head to th body. Wer th condition not diamet rically opposite we should know nothing of ordinary sleep, or In ether words, thee regular period of nnoonsolous neas, and th sam would bo true If nerv current were an Imponderable form of energy. - Every thought and very movement wo make when on our feet demands a atlmulua from brain to body, and being that thee Impulses carry with them eorn of th braln'a vital material It follow that In tiro this organ muat become exhausted, and the longer It ia kept active th more dif ficult 1 eonsclousnss 'tor th greater I Is th desirs tor resignation of will, re pose sr sleep. This brain material Is not -destroyed; It I - absorbed by the many nerves of th. body until eat orated, which la about th time tha brain haa become thoroughly exhausted. . One unconscious, th blood I shut off from th brain, and soon tho electrical" condition aa whll conscious ar re versed, the brain 1 negstlv to th body, and for thla reason nerv currents from all parts of the body flow Into it and" carry with them to reetoro gradually . that wonderful material which It had lost Whll conscious and which In Itself seems t be ths sssene of mind or con- -sctouencee when lodged ia thla organ of mind. Prom th American . Spectator. The Arnold arc a very happy ooupl after all these year. How do you ac count for Itf . - "Well, ho can't gst over the idea that he married a mighty good woman and apenda som ttm each day to prove It to her." , - ( - jhaal th VTalatf.' - .' From Ufa. '. - Toung Lady to Clsrk In Book Store " f am looking for something suitable for an old gentleman Tho haa been mar ried to years. ,Can yoa suggest snme Ihlngt . i Clerk (praaipUy A Half Caaiury. f eaatflsV , A I- 7
