Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR
About The Eugene City guard. (Eugene City, Or.) 1870-1899 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 21, 1899)
lt Bo r I MAJOR "RCIMSECJ. ' I - , , lie prouu . TTV widow of tbe late Captain Mnl.worth. of the tl oroDr'etrwa of tba Bsmeralds 8"L , during which she bail """JL msnsged '' eutabllsbnieni r fc-sbr. je.Trougbt lew young people frt,fuly, riti. ona Mother tyai 5STSl to t.iifb. wJ xi r. Ualiwortb was a bom have ar tBana "".f U. north was one of those rare i aim can sink their own di Tf':f I wa.lr-l.ve lOtWj tlCt 0 bmaraloa tod prospered, nn.i Ibit iae tm .JSTUST who Johed nud wUb SfibofflaDdtba STCblng "-ore tbau mere a,u" . kleb would not reappear it, Irs. MlWorlb aud bur two Jkn w rowing djo. Tto JSSwi rapidly frowlni to a i close, . .. v.. no two J""" People bad Sl"uVe.l .0 each other. To to Z. ibm bad been one or two mild rVMiou.vvi.ioi, had exdted eonsldsr TispKtatlon, but the; had Ml "da NMar ami tad expired before the urildpaaii left Beahrtaa -llrre's Hcr r""" a MnJor n""' , ni) deara," said the widow om JrVlsr, "He want to con.o next Vooday with his son and daughter to giy-ahy, be doeen'l say bow lou,. to eiaiajrl" "vuo ii bar Inquired the eXler of tt Ulaava alallwortb, a prim young UJj of 23. wboM living Intercat wus KDtnd an.i clrcumferenced In tbe cut ling down of uponaea at tbe Bamer alO. Tbe widow passed tbe letter to ber. "lie writes from Sborebam, you see, mJ (bat In very select. We shnll bave to put blin ami tbe aon In the aecoud Joor front aud bis girl lu the room oppo lite ours." Tbeyoungernaugbter nodded approv al. Sue was a pretty girl, who had all btr niotln-r'saiiiiahlllly aud tenderness. mlie.1 altk ber father's soldierly pride. Major Uuiusey duly arrived with bis loo and daughter. He was a middle aged jeiirlenian wboae hnlr was geuer ounly sprluklrd with gray, labeled mili tary from bead lo foot, and possessed of i bluff, beany voice that lusluutly who ibe widow's heart. "I ilways feel thoroughly at home with army gentlemen," she confessed to aim ere he had bean In the bouse half I down boms. "You see, I'm a soldier's daughter and married a man who car ried l rommlsslou. "lladain," replied the Major, "you surprise and honor mo." "Yesjuy poor husband. Captain Malt worth, of the tb Cavalry " "What!" roared the Major, springing fmui his chair. "Your husband old Bob Mullworth of the tb?" "The same, sir." "My dear Mrs. Mnltwortb, this Is In ded a pleasure. 1 mid old Bob er Captalu Mallworth. were mates togeth er before Have you never heard him peak of bis old friend Uuiusey? "Bleu my soul, my dear lady," con tinued tbe excited Major, walking to the window, "Fane coming across the widow of my old frleud. The world Is, after all. quite a little place; now, Isn't ur The opening of the door and the en trance of Maliel caused hliu tu turu round. "Mabel, my dear, this Is Major Itum-f-and-aud be la au old frleud of four poor papa's." Tbe Major bowed to tbe fair young tlrl before him, while she blushed aud murmured, "How d'y' do" In eo pretty manner that the Major was on the ba bul charmed and captivated. iUt evening there was a merry par ty la tbe wldow'l little drawlug-rootn, which excited considerable curiosity ifflong the other boarders. There was much laughter aud Just a few tears ou "part of the hostess, and that ulght Jdj Harold Itumsey dreamed of a Niuhlug blue eyed girl who bad called to "Mr. Ruinsey" no end of times, nl toougb be would have given anything o have l.,.,.ti called Harold. The visit of Major Itumsey, Mr. Har old Itumsey and Miss Plenuor Uuiusey '" quote tbe Seabreete News) was da fdly time 0f utuiunlllled enjoy-pot- The happlneu Of the three suf 'i through the whole of the Esmer wa Hotel, and the proprietress was ,!lr J ""arb that never lu all her UnK?' 'hla period, The visit ''-d from a fortnight to three kai.S 10 I""th. and still the T ""thing of leaving. SoL T V htW Sood to see these ml ; pconh tt,mt g0 happily." said SL jfth' MtoS ma feel Th xt VS" ' C0llfy" Bent' V''r M "'""'Hug at tbe ense- . tooklni away ovar tbe aea. Out- ed f, ,'r".""'"a,K' ,V,,A nlmoal deter rortocday, were growing cold and V,u", end of the, bin line cliff i !JS 11 WO t off by the on, i ,,ed out- Ut C0"'1 ee a U l:"1 " OH" Her hand croon i'l'r W?tcbed be saw ber head """-tower. A ''Wrth." he said, scarcely tW SH'r' "co""' here. You see two young poo,,,,, awa tbl,ry? W Ur SMng tofPhJ." cZn r !'"'' wtehad the two, who, 4 er tbat tll Were 0,,9l'rv- ttZ , R 0DP ""other the sweet ',or Id the world. . , 'Wwasthetliat to speak. W.k.r nouM co,no" the Ht , bj.'" lh0 'blrt ntb year with- bJlT S0"1 1?' thundered the "llrti,."11 mean ,0 h me 1 bat ,! f"r ,h,rtwn reari " om."UTyr' ,n""upted the lit lethl.,u . ""'n bl' Plained. PM ned o well, that her listener " entaniaMic i.p...i 'thi.l chareterlstle military lttt be could h.-.. .. : . 'C V.Mj UU Wl v. ueur; atie cried lu dismay. "It mustn't Be, 1 was forgettlni It's the 13th, aud that would be unlucky. It was on tbe 13tb that my poor Hole ert " "Nonsense, my dear madam," growl ed her liatener. "flureJjr you don't b II. ve in Hint old woman's tal. :" "Hut Robert on the 18th " " Uobert." tbe Major thundered, ami Immediately ipolojclaed, "i r,,r..t myself. What I wanle.l to say Is this: Why should we rjsk the happiness of our boy and girl?" "Why, Indeed?" murmured the lady. "Suppose, for Instance, two other peo ple fouud they could Join forces with advantage and advance on ll nemy's Hue better together than singly. Sup pose, I say-Mrs. Maltworth- BtleiH wbat do you say to inking me?" and here the Major Hopped down on his knees lu most uninllllury Itjla "an an old half pay offlctr without a friend In tbe world. Now, what shall we say?" And like tbe soldier's daughter and 4- Jk I ' P I 'TOU b't'lirniSK AND HONOR MR," SAID Til MAJOIi. the soldier's widow that she was, the blushing proprietress of the Ksmeralda answered "Y'es" with precision. This Is how It Is that the Ksmernlda Is "under entirely new management," and the young people who congregate there In the summer speak regretfully of the old days the days tbat are no more. Buffalo News. OFFICER WORSTED FOR ONCE. ,u;f als lad. I wMow atarted up. hnhaaj rullcemon Fulled to Arret Two Drunken Men and a l it Hog. Ever since be Joined Uie force Police man Andy Murray has made a special ty of the arrest of "drunks," a line of duty for which be seems to be peculiar ly (ltlcd. and In the exercise of which be takes great delight. It was because of his reputatlou for alwayslandlng his man at the nearest patrol box unassist ed that be undertook to arrest two In toxicated ludlvlduals single-handed on Monday night, aud thereby came to grief. Andy was standing at L"Jd and Diamond streets shortly after dark when he saw an oddly assorted pair leaning up against tbe gate of the Odd Kellows' cemetery, both evidently un der the Influence of liquor. One was a man attired In full dress, wearing a high silk hat, who was holding a big Newfoundland dog by a chain. The other was a bicyclist, who was appar ently too far gone to ride, but who still held on to bis wheel. I'ntrolman Murray grabbed each by the shoulder and started for the patrol box. but the prisoners wanted to argue. Tbe trio, came to a halt; the dog ran around them a couple of times, winding up the chain, and then suddenly, espy ing a cnt, made a wild dash for the oth er aide of the street. Tbe unsteady prisoners fell over like tenpins, drag ging their captor with them. In his full Murray Jammed one foot through the spokes of the bicycle's front wheal and, unable to extricate himself, be lay at the bottom of the heap until a broth er omVor came to his assistance. Ho now acknowledges that he bit ofT more than he could "chew." Philadelphia Itecord. The Wealthiest IieuKari. The wealthiest known living profes sional beggar, Simon Oppaslch, an Austrian, was bom without feet or bauds, and sympathy for his Inllrml t!es brought him a large fortune In the shape of alms. In l.HNt, when he was 47 years old. he had saved tTJ.OOO, and In 1888 he bad Increased bl-s fortune by speculation to f.2o,000 In cash nn.l about 40.000 In Trieste and Parenao estates. Since then he has quadrupled his wealth by speculation on the bourse. When Tori, a well-known Italian beg gar, died last year, bank books, securi ties, gold and silver, and other articles, to the value of upward of 80,000, were found In his rooms. Ills heirs were two nephews, who had been existing In a state of miserable poverty for years. A beggar who died In Auxerre, Prance, lu 1803, was found to bave bonds to the value of 1,000.000 francs In an old trunk and 4KJ bottles of wine of the rlntago of itihj. The French seem to to a generous nation, for In the same year an old woman, who lived lu a wretched garret In the Hue de Sevres, Paris, died, leav lug Government securities representing an annual Income of 210, all made by begglug. A beggar named Quttaee Slarcelln, of Avignon, died In November, 1803, and left 20,000 In French Government bonds, to be divided equally between the city and the Bureau de Blenfabv ance. the great French charily society, Loudon Mall. A Serious Matter. Truant scholars do not abound In Switzerland. If a child does not nttend school on a particular day, tbe parent gets a notice from tbe public authority tbat he Is fined o many rrnncs; me secous) day tbe tine Is Increased; ami by the third day tbe amount becomes a serious one. In case or sickiicss, toe pupil la excused, but. If there be any suspicion of shamming, a doctor Is sent If tbe suspicion proves to be well found ed, tbe pnrcut Is required to pay the cost of the doctor's visit. At a million Thanksgiving dinner ta bles a million housekeepers aald when the guests got arouud to pie: "I expect that pie la scorched a Utile On the hot ROMAN WEALTH AND WASTE. Nafta Mteoreod tn xvilic .,i u kiu, or Dinner for Mark Antony. "The pearl Wbleb .'1 ,,trn drank t Antony! health was valued at u.ariy ! four hundred thousand dollars. BO at ate mouthful she dumoeed of a much aa toe cost of Caligula supper, i sup pose that was the most valuable pearl we have any knowledge of; though Julius Caesar owned one worth two hundred and BftJ thousand dollars. Which be gave to ibe mother of llruius the same llruius who afterwards helied to kill Caesar. Pearls seemed lo bave held out particular temptations to people who tool pleasure lu waste ful follies, perhaps because no other Jewel could be so easily swallowed. "Cleopatra's prank was not tbe llrst of Its kind. Tin- same absurdity bad been committed by a silly fellow In Home named Aesop not your favorite fable teller, for he lived centuries ear lier, and was a very wise man. The BflOnnn Aesop was the son of a rich nc tor, and. Just to make himself talked about, be iook a pearl from the ear drop of Cecilia, the wife of the tyrant Hylln, and, ncordlng to writers of that age, drank It lu vinegar. I believe tbat the possibility of dissolving this kind of gem Is disputed by many I. in authorities, but tbe ancients appear to have bad no doubt on the subject, for the Instances recorded by them were numerous, and were attested by men of seleiitlllc standing. A Japanese nat uralist, who has studied pearls minute ly, states that be has fouud them of UCb various quality and structure that the existence of specimens which might be melted does not seem to him Incon ceivable. Hut whether Aesop liquefied his pearl or not, the performance cer tainly cost hint a sum equivalent to forty thousand dollars-qulte enough, though nothing lu comparison with what Cleopatra squandered. Hers was the wildest piece of extr. vagauce that I can recall. , "It was the fashion to be extrava gant then. Mark Antony was not far behind the Kgyptlnn queen lu that re spect, though his fancy was not for beverages flavored by trinkets. Sub stantial food wus more In his Hue. A visitor who once went Into the kitchen of his palace In Alexandria saw eight wild iKiars roasting at the same time, ami thought there tn list be an Immense number of guests expected; but the cook told him only twelve persons would dine tbat day, nnd the reusou of the extensive preparation was that no one could say exactly when Antony would go to the table. Hut whenever be gave the slgnnl the meat must he just lu proper condition at that mo ment. So it was the rule to get ready n series of dinners, overlapping one nn other. you might say, at Intervals of fifteen or twenty minutes. Only one could be eaten, nnd the rest were wast ed; but the waste did uot matter. An tony was never kept waiting, and that In his opinion, was the thing to be con sidered." St. Nicholas. The largest known moth Is the giant atlas, a native of China, the wings of which measure nine luclics ucross. The falling of a leaf Is brought nbout by the formation of a thlu layer of veg etable tissue at the point where the leaf stem Joins the branch of the tree. After the leaf ceases to make starch and su gar for the tree the tissue begins to grow, and actually cuts the leaf. The falling of ripe fruit Is dependent upon the same process. Many lusects can fly faster than birds. The common house tly can ordi narily fly twenty-five feet a s. ntt Hut when It Is alarmed it has been found that It can Increase Its rate of speed over 100 feet per second. Students of bird lore nnd the many friends of the feathered tribe are con cerned because enormous numbers of sea gulls are being driven from their homes along tbe coasts. It Is said tbat tin- work of the Government in prepar ing coast defenses has almost destroyed tin- homes of the sea gulls. The giraffe has such powers of mim icry that, although Its size might to supposed to make It a conspicuous ob ject to Its enemies, the most practiced eye has Ik'cii deceived by the animal's resemblance to one of the dead nnd blasted tree trunks which abound In Its haunts. Lions have been known to gar.e long and earnestly at a motionless giraffe, and. being unable to decide that It was not a tree, turn and skulk away. l in nm g Man's Wattes. The fact that others shirk Is a poor reason for neglect to earn one's wages. The Young People's Weekly prints tbe following anecdote about a boy who was an honest worker: One day, after a severe storm, a large number of meu aud boys were out on the roads of a country town to shovel out the drifts. Kaeh workman was paid a quarter of n dollar an hour, and, as mny be supposed, there was no very strict watch kelit upon them; but one little fellow seemed to be working with all his might, and bis comrades laughed at him. "Why, Jim. are you after the Job of highway surveyor, or do you expect to get more thnn the rest of us for putting In so?" Let's put him out; he Is shortening our Job; 't won't Inst till ulght, at this rate," laughed another. "I am getting man's pay for the first time In my life, and I mean to earn It," said Jim. "I don't suppose the town cares, nor tbat I shall get nny more money at ulght; but I shall feel a big sight better myself." "You've begun right. Jim." said the surveyor, who was not very strict lu tie half of the town, but bad a business of bis own, where he appreciated work men with a conscience. The New Curative Method. The doctors, In dealing with the body, are coming to the conclusion that the great remedy for disease is tue nour ishment of Ufa, They still sometimes attack disease directly, as when they uiaecrlhe nn antidote for a pot They sometimes save life by lesseulng life, as when they amputate a diseased limb and the cripple lives, though al ways a cripple. But for the most part hygiene Is taking the pliCO ef d-n.'s Nature Is nursed and eared for. and drugs are used, If at all, only to Strengthen Nature and add to her ro. ii pern live power, Formerly, for tMQ pie, tbe coaaumptire eras shut up in a warm room, kept away from draughis. guarded against the cold, and often, If Uot ordinarily, IntuthYlciitly nourished either ou gruels by the doctor! COUII -.-I. or on InoafltaiOOl food for want of sufficient appetite. Now (he eon.innp live goes to tbe Adirondack, wraps up lu furs, alls upon tbe porch In all weathers with the thermometer al aero, iai.es p root rl hod eserciee, ileope. roeta and .'ins heartily. No attempt I made by drugs directly to attack the bin llll which nre eating away the pa tient's life. The doctor simply attempts to nourish Nature and make Iter strong, ami Nature herself, as the mlcroocopc domouatratoe, surrounds the l.a.illl with tissues of her own producing, I in prisons them In solitary cells, and so makes the mini "Immune" from the en nay which assails his Ufa, The Outlook. WHAT THE LAW DECIDES A line fence maliciously erected so high as lo cut off the light and air from tbe windows of tl neighbor's bOUM Is held. Ill Letts vs. Kes-ler ili.i. 40 L it. A. 177, to be within the exercise of a legal right. A note to the case presents tbe authorities ou the liability for ma licious erection of a fence. A dollar bill, from the upper left baud corner of which a piece an Inch and a half by an Inch and n quarter has been torn. Is held, lu North Hudson OoUUty Unilroad Company vs. Anderson iN. J.i, 40 L .It. A. tlo. to l.c t uncb muti lated to constitute a legal tender for car fare. An employer who took an Injured em ploye to a boepltal and agreed to pay for his treatment is held, in It Ba ma nna Hospital vs. Minneapolis Interna tional Electric Company (Minn.), 40 L It. A. 3HS. to have had uo right to cancel his engagement for the care of the ser vant until the latter could be removed without serious danger to life or health. Petroleum oil aud natural gas are held. In Heller vs. Holland (O.I, 40 L It. A, 2(M1, not to be conveyed by a con veyance of all the coal of every variety "and all the Iron ore, Are day and other valuable minerals," with the right to use the surface of Ibe land as may be lattery for shafts, railroads, etc.. to facilitate the mining ami removal of the coal and other minerals. GUM CHEWING. The Story of Home. Sweet Itnme. A new story Is now told of the llrst time "Home, Sweet llouic," was sung In public. When the government at tempted to bar Iae the contending factions In Ibe dlspule on the UeorgbV Tennessee boundary line, by establish ing a trading pool there, John Howard Payne was accused of Inciting (lie db lalistled Indians and half breeds, nnd .vils arrested and can led to the couu ll house. An Indian, who committed suicide on be grave of his wife and child, was Hurled III tbe presence of a number of moil, among whom was Payne. As the Ixxly of the Indian was lowered Into the grave, Payne bummed to himself the song that has become so famous. General Blahop called the young man to him aud said sternly: "Where did you learn that song?" "I wrote It myself," OUBWered Payne, "Where did you gel the tune?" "I composed that nlso." "Will you give me a copy of it?" "Certainly." "Well." said the old Indian tighter, "appearances .nay be agalnsl you, but a man. who can write a song like that Is no Incendiary, and I am going to sjel you free." Pay ne had Itoen living In the house of n neighboring family, and on his return he related the circumstances, ami showed the pr.ss that General Blabop bad given him. Thai was the first time that "Home, Sweet dome," was ever beard In public Saturday Evening Post. An OONtn Trolley Line. An ocean trolley line, which reaches nearly a quarter of a mile over the sea, conveying either passengers or mer chandise, Is one of the curious sights to be seen at Hear llurlsir, on the Paellle coast, not far from San Francisco, While the ostensible object of Mils strange trolley Is the carrying of linn ber from the rocky highland aboard tbe big schooners which form Ihoocean ter minus of the line, dozens of lumbermen ride III a basket attached to the sus pended cable on a wheel. Of course, there Is no electricity Uted III connection with this novel trolley. The power of gravity does mosl of the bard work. The lumber schooners come from the Mendocino County ports. I'n III a year ago they were loaded by the slow process of lighters plying to nnd from the wharves. By the new trolley system lumber In any quantity can in curried from any Island point over n long and high railroad bridge to a sort of cage, where the wooden cargoes are Stacked, and thence to the deck of each ship. Tbe trolley line Is thrown from the lumber cage to the i ' -seis by means of a rope shot from a mortar. New York Evening Journal. Drive Asa; Hail Clouds. Tbe Austrian Minister of Agriculture has sanctioned nn appropriation for es tabllablog, at a cost of 2,000 florins llilrtv-tliree stall. ma at which the army Is to supply g""s and ammuni tion for driving away hall clouds. It Is considered proved that the concussion and the clouds of smoke rising Into the air affect tbe atmospheric state of hu midity. Who Hunts Ibe Most Coal? The consumption of coal per bend of i.ol.n i.n ion is lowest in Austria, where It IB only one-sixth ton per annum, nnd highest In Croat Mrltaln, where each person averages three and three tenths tons each year. In the D Sited Stat. s the average is two and one fourth tons a year. , Wby Bed Hrliates a BetfL U.-d Irritates oxeu ln . ause It Is tin n.M.i.l.oneiitnrv col-.r to green, and the eyes of the cattle Is-lng fixed so much 00 herbage, anything red Impresses their sight with Increased Intensity. I.st lr Hlr l Mny lie it I'oxt. Lady birds are Is lng Imported Inn P.gypt from New South Wales In ord. t to protect fruit from parasitic Insects They may prove as had a curse ua the sparrowa. HUMOR OF THE WEEK a H..-.I..O Traveler Wba vt'ii Oe Horns aod T'ii Abonl it. S. Hanfblnm, : years of age. blonde gray, whiskered, volatile, and all the way from si. Petersburg. Kneels i at the Brown Palace Hotel. To the sur prise of a caller, who bad never seen the g, nil. man In-fore, Mr. Haufbluiu turned, and. with an expression of delight upon his face, exclaimed: ".xch. my frleud! I am llll wis fire light. You are xe xlicuilc mail from M.-l boom rich I meet ou 10 high uioillllalu. xe peak of tat y.ni call heem? Ah! Pike, ze peafe 01 PlkO, l-'el ees wis IS greatest pleOSlf I see yon." when gently told ibsl to was mtstak- en be could hardly believe It. "p.os cct pooseeb? Veil, eel ees re markabla xe rayaambianco," His accent ami vernacular were pe culiar. Sometimes he talked like a German, sometimes like a frenchman. Ills manner was wholly Preach. "Yes, snlr," said he in answer to a question. "I am a resident of St. Pee t rshayrg. I tvas born In Warsaw. I'o laud, but 1 leev lu It rUSStO lairty yalrce. illy name ees Jalrmaii. but I am not. Pet ees only xe name vlcb ees Jalrman. Heed you notOOCO xal name? rjanf. you see, meoncs hemp, ami blunt ees ttower; zat ees allogaylluilr, hemp flower, .at ees preely, ees eet not?" It was. and his visitor admitted It. "I haf been lu America some VCefea, ami haf not. ...ii many t'lnga to pieces me and some rich do not. Now, r.il sccuguhir ciMlOOffl of eating gom. .at ees ze most remarkable, pel ees not falar me to OOndorStSnd. All ze time ley bite, I. lie. bite, chewing all gom. So many, too!" And Mr. llanfldum held up both bands and arms like a pair of eidantatlon points. "tin ze car from Boofalo to Noeach eera xalr wass a young I eddy seeling In front of me ItlUg zls gom -wlsout stop, sink of It! All ze lime! I ask: 'Vai ees zls zat ze people all eating?' I res told, i palrcbaaa some of ze leedle sur an' put heem lu my mouse Pa ah! i Ihpnl heem out. p.et ees like inedeeceii nn.l vorse. And eet ees so ogly! I ren der so much as zls uiees er able habeet, and eet sconce to be ze hlhOSl dees teenkteef, nayceanol sea sol zo?" The Impeachment was admitted wllb grief. "And ees zalr no r ra.vme.lee. no cure for zis-s ter-ralble sing? No? Bal sea sad."- Denver Post STORIES TOLD BY FUNNY MEN OF THE PRESS. Oiiti, curion mot Laagkabto Pteaaea .. Human Nuture OropklOOJlf POV" trujr.l by Knilnrnl Word Artists of Our Own I. . i Undue! of Kim. Mrs. Amelia P. Itarr's latest novel h called "1. Thou, and the Oilier." ll Is said that George Moore has al mosi Bnlabed a sequel to "Bvelyn In ues." Dean Pnrrar is busily engaged upon n new book, to Ik- entitled "The Life of I.Ives; ortj Punher Studies In the Life of Christ." Anthony Hope has Just finished a ni.M-i which is devoied lo a delicate ami penetrating study of Dlaraell, It Is a new development in the novellat'a career and win be anticipated with great Interest. Professor It. Q, Monliou's inetlio.l of presenting In modern literary form Ibe several pans of the llihlc appears lo good advantage In his "St. John," espe cially lu indicating tbe dramatic move ment in Hi.- book of Revelation, Men Phlllpottaf new novel, "ObQ- dren of the Mlat," is a story of r Dartmoor, and extends over a period of ten years. As III "Lying Prophets," Mr. Pblllpotts tried lo draw a faithful picture of a girl, so In this I k. W0 are told, be has attempted to depict a boy. Contrary to the experience of most translators, whose fate It Is lo reap Mill.- of honor and less of pay for their painstaking work, Jeremiah Curtln, the translator of "Juo Va.lls," Is said to bave realised $'-'.".( n Ml as bis share of the unprecedented sales of Rlonkls wlca'i masterpiece. BJdmond Rostand, aotbor of "Cyrano le Bergerac," has written to an Atnerl an friend disclaiming the COOIemptU- mis references lo ibe American nation attributed tO him by some newspapers. In point of fact he lias every reason to feel amiably disposed toward Ameri cans, as be is receiving large sums of i icy all the time from the success of the play and tbe book. The prose Irans lotion by etlee Gertrude Hall pays blra a royally on every copy sold, and the publishers announce the thirteenth thousand already. The success of Mansibid's production, moreover, is netting m. Boatand something like j iimi a day. Yankee Ingenuity lllil I. Only a few years ago practically all the canned p.-as consumed in tills coun try were Imported from Prance, the famous petll pols. At thai time It was deemed Impossible to produce the re quired quality lu Ibis country, consum ers desiring Bra, even bright green, goods, and though sulphate of COnpol was used In securing ilial color It made comparatively little difference wllb the trade. American packers, however, ex perimented With the object of produc ing a pea the equal of the French arti cle, and how well tle-y succeeded Is now an old story. Starling with good sets), nud under careful cultivation, the American pen now equals (he Imported product of Prance, and our packers have built up an Industry wbleb has become au Important fialure of Ibe great canned goods trade of Ihe coun try. TuS careful selection of seed has resulted In n variety having all (he de sirable qualities of tin- French product and requiring tin- addition of no color ing substances lo make them attrac tive. American canned peas sinn. I on their merits. Wisconsin and New York are the leading pen packing Stales, al though others are rapidly developing ihe Industry, Heal tltn Iri tis. Tickets were sold to more people for a circus at I-os Angeles than the tent would bold. A i.. .in who had paid ft for two seats which he could not get to fSJOd not alone for the return of his money, bet for ft paid out In carriage hire, and he won a verdict for both) with more to cover the costs of tbe trial. Kvery politician believes he Is good dough for any office. An OfajMt of Tumuli. "it i money that makes a man Im portanl." "1 don't know; ll seems to me I'm of more Importance whan i haven't any money." Arlstneraca of Dolldoaa, "My doll can ihttl her eyes aud go to sleep just lovely ." "Hull! My doll never goes to sleep al ail; kbe's got uuomular." A Won Irrful WosMSh "llobson doles on his mother In law." "Just lo is- peculiar T" "No; at Christmas she always tends him something that his wife can't use." Worfclng'Claas . "Those new neighbors mUSl to very ordinary people." "Why?" "Their cats catch mice." hit, ills roles was tonne with emotion. And did she pity him? All, yes! Qeneroua girl that she was, she banded him au entire box of lozen ges dial some distributer bnd left upon ihe doorstep the day before. llllluUt.llalll.il- 1'ronf. "Why .1.. you think he Is a self ma. li mn ii "Because ha wears chin whiskers In stead of mutton c1iohj." Xlcrrltr u Krrler. "No, I thank you. I prefer to stand." The atonl woman who was standing An i .- Ouesa. Mr Itllinkus- Why do you think Mil dred and young P. . kl.-lgh are engaged? Mm Itllinkus After he went away last night I lied paper burning In the kitchen stove ami this morning I found a piece ..f an envelope nddreased lo her lu au. .liter's hand willing. nojeoosoi .. .. "Is he a successful man?" "Yes, very. He has been mixed up In three bank failures and succeeded In keeping out of ihe penitentiary every time." I vl.lrntljr Failure. s ngteton My eongratnlatlona, ohi man; no more sewing on buttons now, eh?" We l.-rly No, hidoodl I wear a belt now. It ke.ps me so busy supsirtlng a wife that i haven't time to sew on buttons. Orttlnu nt Ibe Vucta. Insurance Agenl Pardon uie, mail am, bin w hat Is your age? Miss AntlquatO- 1 have seen 22 sum mers. Insurance Ag. nt Yi-s, of course; but how many limes .11.1 you see l hem? Feminine Itlplontnry. HaUle Would you call Nell a beauty? Kil l Well, that depends. Rattle I lepends ou what? Plla Whether I was conversing with her or some one else. trailed to Coaelllate, As tbe Conventional young man sat talking with the conventional young woman the conventional stem father came In. Tin- young man would fain be socia ble and at ease. " The open door " began he. "The front door Is open at this min ute," said the father. IndlaJiapoHs Journal. Ton XX'enk a ComnitrWoa, At la(. after many dangers, she had THAININd SCHOOL "Wtot'S the cause of Ihe Infernal racket In the next room?" "It Is Schmidt, the dog fancier, who Is breaking lu some dogs Intended for UUSlcally Inclined mistresses." Megge iidorfi-r's lllaeltcr. up III the crowded car looked straight ahead of ber as she made Ibis remark. The men sluing down glanced fur lively ,it each oilier. "I didn't hear anybody offering me n Seat," she sai l, still looking straight nt the front and of the ear, "but I look ll for granted Somebody bad done It," Six men SlOWly rose up. "No, I thank you." she said. Without looking at any of them. "I've been standing for Bfteen minutes. It won't hurt me lo keep ll up a Hide longer. I get off at Ibe next crossing." Tin -n six men sat down again, much relieved. She had overesl linalisl them. Oelllnsi Hack at Her. "Yes, Mrs. Punk, i can understand why you wouldn't live lu a small town." "What do you menu?" "Anybody can live In n city, imt it takes people who have mcnini re Sources to enjoy life In n small town." Well Portllfd, "We never suffer from cold hands when WS go mil. 'Are you so robust?" 'No; but my wife has her muff nn.l I carry the poodle." ll Wus Natural. sin- (after the honeymoon) Pve often Wondered, dear, what yon ever saw In me to cause you lo liiilke me your wife. He That's a strange coincidence. Ho you know I've ask. si myself ilial ques tion a hundred times SiOCS we've boOS married? ii . Kflnrt. "I always nppreelate It when Illbbs is pleasant to me. 'Why?" 'BeCS OSS ll Is hard work for him to be pleasant to anybody." OolHI In for Fieri I.e. What did Hiss say lu her letter to Santa ( 'lulls V" Sh. said slie wan let! a pair of skaliti Slid a piano." lie' uhl tba t'rnae. 'Hobby, what kind of a sletl do you want ?" "I wnut one tbut's pretty enough to ton) IHa on." Inuring It Out. "Ilnve you any Idea bow old Mrs Wexford is?" "Well, no, not exactly, but she must Ik- pretty WOll down lu the 20s yet. I heard Mrs. BlOXhnm say the other day that slie didn't believe the biily was 'a day over 357 " Museum Kicltement. "The two-heeded girl got up another rumpus Ibis morning." "Wluit was she mail iiImiiiI?" "I me of her bends picked out a hat Just like thut which the other one had." The Having I lause. "Dott'l you get tired of so much BhnksH-are at your club?" "Well, we always have tesu."--Defeats l-'rt-v Press. braved the terrors of the Obllkooi pass and had rejoined her lover oil the Klon dike. "Arc you glad to see me?" she askisl. "Do you hi tl I think that I tun worth my Weight lu gold?" "In gold?" he sried, contemptuously, ns he fold. si her to his frojen bosom. "My darling, your are worth your weight In hash!" Chi, ago Times Herald. Mmilar but UlrTerent, Hlggs hi. 1 you employ a typewriter in copy your manuscript? Biggs I thought I did. but on looking over ibe work I (Uncovered that I had employed a type wronger. A Ciiah Clearance. "Cordelia Is selling everything to go abroad again." "She Is?" "Yes; she offered to sell me her bi cycle nud her engagement to Mr. Jimp." ('nnfeaeliina. "Gladys Lnctla I must make a con feoslon before we are married. You know me ns (luy Percy Pltx-Wllllnm, but the folks nt home cnll tne 'Hill.' " "That's all right. My pa and ma call me Toadlo.'" Pleasant for Jinks. Jinks They any married peoplt grow to resemble each other. Mrs. Jinks Well, I know It's quits Impossible for a married woman to keep her good looks. Larks. Hopeful. (irnngcr How ure you getting along at your house? TluiHou Pretty well, on the whole. We are nearly out of everything but debt, nnd 111 time, If things go on as they have been going, we ought to ha out of tlmt.-Tioston Transcript. Men ml lloraea It in.-. I In llattle. in regular bnKles Ihe proportion ol loss among men nud horses Is quite Close, and lu hand to hand combats of cavalry, as well as in shtirp artillery engagements, for every man killed or wounded there Is also n dumb warrior entitled to a place beside him ou the roll of honor. The Light llrlgade nt Ha Ink lava rode In tMiO (not i00) strong and lost Jss men, but of tbe lUlU horses BOO were shot down by the Itusslan guns. In the fierce charges of the Herman uhlans and cuirassiers nt Vlouvllle, Mars in Tour, lu 1870, 1,-lut) men and 1,000 horses were killed and wounded. In the tierce artillery contests on the Mime Held 7: :n men and over 1,000 horses fell around the guns. At Grave lotto, soon after Mars In Tour, the ar tlDery lighting was also terrible, and l,;iisj horses were shot down around the bait. rles, though the loss of the artillerists was less than 1,000. -Our Animal pri.-n.is. A play Is never satisfactory If there la a man or woman left over when the pairing off occurs In tbe last set. M