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About The Eugene City guard. (Eugene City, Or.) 1870-1899 | View Entire Issue (Nov. 12, 1881)
COMPEXSAT 05. For every leaf of f3, A golden tbeafi.. Fo-every Ming flower, A ripened iheef ;' For every perched team! A ilmp of rsin ; For every lunnr dy, The Ur gin. Fur every wsrrinz wsye, A pretty (bell ; For every sound of wo?; A joy ou bell ; . For every putiog are, A iiHrfber'i ki-e; And wbit eould better be, Der child, than Ibiit leorge Cooper, T1KI56 BOABDEES. "It was a scandal," tbe neighbors said, 'tUt Miss Deli should be obliged to take boarder, after all she'd been tbrough;and heaven knows boarder did Lelp a body work ont her salvation. And ao much money in the family, too, tak ing it by mall and large! Wasn't her Uncle Ebcn, over at Dover, well-to-do, and not a chick of Lis own to care for ex cept the boy he Lad adopted, who was no credit to him? It was odd , now, that man with poor relutions should take a stranger when his own Bean ana iiiooa was needy: bnt sometimes it does seern as if folks had more fueling for others than for their own kith and km Then there were cousins in the city.forehanded and fashionable, who were never worth a row of pins to Delia, and there was her great-nncle John's widow alarkin' on the continent, a-garnbling at JJaden an den. and trying the waters of every min' end spring in the three kingdoms, for no disease under tbe sun but old age. She had been known to say that her folks were too rich already, and probably she would endow some hospital with her property." Plainly, wealthy relatives were of no value to Miss Delia. To be sure, she had never seen her great-aunt niece since she was a child, when her nnclo John bad brought her into their life for a mouth s visit, with her French maid and dresses, her jowels and fallals, which won the heart of her name sake. Since (ben Uncle John's widow had become a sort of gilded creation, al ways young and beautiful: for, though Delia bad received little gifts occasion ally from across tbe seas for the lant fif teen years, she had neither beard nor aeen anything of the being who had in spired her youthful imagination.and was Juite uncertain if such a person as Mrs. ohn Kogerson was in the land of tho living. Dead or alive, she 'seemed to have no difference iu Delias humdrum life. After having nursed her father through, a long sicknesj, Delia found that he bad left a heavy mortgage on the homestead, and her mother and herself on the high road to the poor bouse, un ions they should better themselves. As her mother was already bedridden, the stirring naturally fell upon Delia, and abe advertised for sundry boarders : Good board in the country to tho river side, at seven dollars a week. Large chambers, broad piazzas, fino views, borrios and new milk. One mile from the station. Address Delia Koohbho.v, Croftoborongh, Maine. "Cheap enough!" commented an Iderly lady who happened upon it. "Delia Rgerson. An old maid, I sup pose, obliged to look ont for herself. I've a good mind to try ber brood piazzas and new milk. If I don't like it, there'll Le no barm done." And so Delia's first boarder arrived an old lady with false frout bair, brown, wrinkled skin, faded eyes, a black alpuct gown and a bair trunk. Delia in ado her as welcome as if she bad been a duchess; lightod a fire in Mrs. Clement's room, as the night was damp, and brought out bnr daintiest cup and saucer, with the fade less old roses wreathing them. "Won dorfully kind," roflaoted Mrs. Clement, as she combed out bor wisps of gray hair and confided the false front to a box. "Wonderful kindness for seven dollars a wcekt Hue's now to tho trade. Sho'll learn' better. Unman nature doesn't chango with latitudes. She'll find it doesn't pay to considor tho comfort of a poverty-stricken old crcsturo." But iu spite of ber worldly wisdom, Mrs. Clem ent was forced to confess that Delia hud begun as she meant to bold out, though other boardors came to domuud her at tention, to multiply bor cares. Tho fret and jar of conflicting temperament under her roof wus a new experience to Delia. When Mrs. Uriscoruu complained of tho mosquitoes, with an air as if Miss Itogorson wero responsible for their cre ation; of the flios, as if they were new acquaintances; of want of appetite, as though Delia bad screed to supply it along with borries and now milk; of tho weuthor, as if she Lad pledged herself thcro would be no sudden ehangos to annoy her hoarders; of the shabby house and antiquated furniture, "too old for comfort and not old enough for fashion" then Delia doubtod if taking boarders was ber mission. "What' makes you keep us, my dear?" asked Mrs. Clement, after a day when evorythiug and every body bud soenied to go wrong. "Why didn't you ever marrj? You bad a lover, i dare say." "Yes; a long, long time ago." "Tell mo about bim it?" "There isn't much to tell. lie askod me to marry him. lie was going to Aus tralia. I couldn't leave father and mother you know (they were both fee lie,) and ho couldn't stay here. "That's all." "And you yon " " 'Now all men beside are to me like shadows.' " "And Lave you ncvor Leurd of him since?" "Yes. lie wrote; but where was the use? It could never come to anything. It was better for Litn to forgot mo aud mirrr I w ziZZZ SDOU; uia neck. I didn't answer his letter." "And supposing bo should return aomo day, would von marry him?" "I dare say," laughed Delia, gently, as if tbe idea were familiar, "let the neighbors laugh eVor so wisely, I've thought of it sometimes, sitting alone, when the world was barren and common place. One must have recreation of some kind, you know. Everybody requires a little romance, a little poetry, to flavor every day thinking and doing. I'm afraid you think me a silly old maid, Mrs. Clement." "No. The bear never grows old. The akin shrivels, tbe color departs, the eyes fade, the feat t res grow pinched; but the soul is beir of eternal youth it is as hi.ntifnl at fourscore as at 'sweet 20. Time makes amends for the ravages of tl.a bodv br developing the spirit, ion didn't tell me yonr lover's name. Per baps yon would rather not." "Ilia nsme wss Stephen Langdon, Sometimes Captain Seymour runs against bim in Melbourne, and brings me word bow be looks and what be ia doing; though I never ask, and Stephen never aaaa tor me mat u u, Delia's summer boarders were not a success, t be sure. If they took no money ont of ber pocket, they put none in. She was obliged to eke out her sup port by copying for Lawyer Danmore and embroidering for Mrs. Judge Dorr. One by one ber boarders dropped away like autum leaves; an out om mt clement. "I believe 111 stay on," she said. "I'm getting too old to move often. Perhaps you take winter boarders at reduced rates, tn?" "Do you think my terms high?" "By no means. But wbeu one's purse is low-" "Yes; I know. Do stay at yonr own price. I can't spare you. ' She bad crown such a fondness for the old lady that to refuse ber would have seemed like turning ber own mother out of doors: besides one month more would not signify. But she found it hard to make both ends meet, and often went to bed binary that ber mother and Mrs. Clement might enjoy enough. without there appearing to be "just a pattern." At Christmas, however, came a ray of sunshine lor Leiia, in uie snape of a hundred-dollar bill irom an un known friend. "It can't be meant for me." she cried, It's directed to DeliatKogerson," said her mother; "and there's nobody else of that name, i?w that your Aunt Delia's dead." "We are not sure she's duad, "objected Delia. "Horrors! Don't you know whether your own aunt is dead or alive? asked Mrs. Clement. "It isn't our fault. She is rich and lives abroad. I was named for ber. I used to look in the glass and try to be lieve I'd inherit her beauty with the name, though she was only our great' uncle's wife." "She ought to be doing something for yon- now can sue, u sue is dead; i uon t blame ber, anyway. Her money is ber own t) use according to ber pleasure. Lncle John made it himself and gave it to her." "But if she should come back to yon, having run through with it, you'd divide your last crust with her, I'll be i..i "I suppose I should," replied Delia. The winter wore away as winters will, and tbe miracles of spring began in fields and nayside; and Delia's boarders re turned with the June roses, and dropped away again with the falling leaves, and still Mrs. Clement stayed on and on. Just now she bad been some weeks in arrears with ber reduced board. No money bad been forthcoming for some time, and she was growing more feeble daily, needed tho luxuries of an invalid and the attention of a nurse, both of hich Delia bestowed upon her, without taking thought of tbe morrow. "I must bear from my man-of-busi- ncss to-morrow, Delis; I am knee doep in debt to yon," she began one night. "Don t mention it!" cried Delia. "I d rather never see a cent of it than have you take it to heart. Yon are wel come to stay aud share pot-luck with us; you are such company for mother and me." "Thank you, my dear. I've grown as fond of you as if yon were my own flesh and blood. There, turn down the light, please. Draw tue curtain, dear, and put another stick on tho fire, please. It grows chilly, doesn t it. 1 ou might kiss mo just once, if you wouldn't mind. It's a hundred years or so sinco anyone kissed me." And next morning when Delia .carried np Mrs. Clement's breakfast, her board er lay cold and still upon the pillows." i he rJrst shock over, Delia wrote to tho lawyer of whom she had beard Mrs. Clement speak as having charge of her affairs, beggiug him to notify that lady's relatives, if she had any. In reply Mr. Willis wrote: "lhe late Mrs. Clements appears to have no near relatives. Some distant cousins, who have an abundance of thic world's goods, yet served ber shabbily when she tested their generos ity as sho has tried joins, are all that remain of her family. Iu the meantime 1 enclose you a copy of her list will and testament, to peruse at your leistue." "What interest does he think I take in Mrs. Clements will," thought Delia; but she read, nevertheless: Being of sound mind this the lGth day of Juno, 1H , I, Delia Ilogerson Clem ent, do hereby leave one hundred dollars to each of my cousins; and I bequeath the rosiduo of my property, viz., thirty thousand dollars invested in the Ingot .Mining Company, fifty thousand dollars iu United States bouds, twenty thousaud in the Fortune Flannel mills, and my jewels, to the beloved niece of mr first husband, John Rogerson, Delia Roger- son, of Croftsborough, Maine. ' tor I was a stranger and ye took me in; hungry, aud ye fed me; sick, and ye ministered unto me." "Goodness alive!" cried the neighbors. whon the facts reached their ears. "What a profitable thiug it is to take borders. Everybody in town will be trying it. Of courso Steve Langdon will come aud marry her, if she were forty old maids. ion may stick a piu in there! Delia did not open her bouse to boarders the next season. She found enough to do in looking after her money and spending it; in repljiug to letters from indigent jeople, w ho seemed to in crease alurmiugly; in receiving old menus, who suddenly found time to re member her existence. And sure enough, among the rest appeared Steve Langdon, aud all the village said; "I told you so." "It's not m t fault that you and I are single yet, Delia," he said. "And we are too old to think of it now, Steve." "Nonsense! It's never too late to mend. I'm not rich, Delia, but I've enough for two and to spare." "I wouldn't be contented not to drive in my carriage and have servants under me now," laughed Delia. "Indeed I Then pertfaps you have a better match in view. Captain Seymour asked me, by the way, if I had come to interfere with Squire Jones' interest." "Yes. Squire Jones j nposei to me last week." "Now, see here, Delia. Have I ccme all the way from Melbourne on a fool's errand 7 There I was growing used to my misery and loneliness, when the man brings in a letter in a strange hand, which tells me that my dear love, Delia Rogerson, loves and dreams of me still, is poor and alone, and needs me me And tbe letter ia signed by her aunt, Mrs. Clement, who ought to know. I packed my household goods and came." "1m glad that you did. "In order that I may congratulate Squire Jones? "But I haven't accepted bim. In fact, I've refused bim because "Bocsuse you will marry yonr old love, like the lass in the song, Delia? In Croftsborough people are not yet tired of telling how a woman made money by taking boarders. In Je pendent. IM Charinlnf. There is no perfection in this world, and ao it happened that once upon a time Holiday House for so I called it in my fancy now was troubled by strange vis itants. Singular noises were beard at the watching honr of eight, and bells were rung unaccountably, when all visi ble bands were in bed. Nora, Granny's favorite maid, began to grow pale, and to go about after dusk uneasily, and with seared looks. I or was sue mnch com forted when certain depredations on Granny's stores, accompanied by other sufficient evidence, had convinced tbe household that rats were the cause of the disturbance. To Nora's mind, rata were acaicely less terrible than ghosts; indeed, I am sure her fancy invested them with some of tbe terrors of the su pernatural. One night, coming into our room witu a candle when we were fast asleep, she spied a black spot on my sister Bessie s pillow, a spot which fled precipitately when the light appeared. With a scream that rang through tbe bouse, Nora fell on ber knees, and was prsying and cross ing herself frantically when Granny hnrried in. She turned her entreaties to ber mistress then, and clinging to dear Grannr.sbe wept before her and im plored that she might that very hou be allowed to go in search oi a man (she had heard ber mother speak of him) who was possessed of a charm fatal to rats. The lives of the innocent children, 6he said, might be sacrificed if the mistress persisted in ber refusal; for if Bessie's gutrdian angel bad not sent her Nora into the room at that moment, the rat wonld surely have sucked the sweet child's blood! Granny did not like the rats, certainly; yet she was very un willing to lend her countenance to the practice of occult arts; but it was not in ber long to resist tears and entreaties. Beside, the girl wss half wild with ter ror; so there was nothing for it but to consent. Early the next day Granny promised her she should be permitted to go in search of the man, whose name even she did not know, and who she acknowledged might have died long since without having imparted his secret to another. Nora spent the rest of the night open-eyed in our room, sewing to keep herself awake, and did not thereby improve her mental condition. Next morning, when we knew that business was in hand, all of ns who were old enough to feel interested in it were for escorting Nora on her way; and what could that best of Grannies do but pack us np a banket of provisions, and send ns off in the green donkey cur that had done duty before on many a summer's day ramble. To all but Nora the whole thing was a summer dav's frolic; and I am afraid we ill requited her ready sym pathy with all our childish fears and troubles, by making her snxiety on this oa.'osiou the subject of our thoughtless mockery. It was a day's journey to find out that old man and to bring him buck ith us. Persistent inquiries of various individuals at length brought ns upon the right track, aud late in the afternoon we came in sight of the man we wanted, lie was a small old man, somewhat past the years of labor sitting at bis cabin door smoking a pipe, his little grandchild at his feet stringing daisies. He had long white bair, aud a cast of countenance that even gave me the idea of a covetous aud unscrupulous character. To our disappointment, be drew Nora apart, in order to ler.rn why we bad come in seurch of him, aud the few words we heard them exchange, were in Irish. They were not long, however, jn coming to an under standing, for Nora soon came back to us, looking more contented than she Lad done for somo days; and she told us that if we would let the old man have her place in the car, she would take a short way across the fields, aud meet us near homo. It was growing dark when we arrived at Holiday House, and Granny was on the steps looking ont for us. I remem ber she kissed us all as we came in, but was not quite gracious to Nora, whose action she still regarded with disfavor. e were all very tired Bessie indeed was carried in fast asleep so that we could give Granny no account of our doings until we had been refreshed with supper. Meanwhile in another part of the n-mises tho "charmer" was at work. When Nora came to prepare the child re n for bed, she told us that before he would partake of any refreshments, he hud called for a pen, ink and paper; and having torn the last into slips, ho pro ceeded to write ou each pieco some mys tic words, that no one should on any ac c unt presumo to read or try to read. This ifono, the papers were rolled up into H)llets, and placed, with ceromonies that none were allowed to witness, in every rat's hole that hail been discovered. If they were removed nr trwio)J ;ot oulv would tho charm be broken, bnt prolwbly worse things than rats would visit the bouse. The charmer was then rewarded in money by contributions raised among the servants; for they would not ask the mistress to pay for proceedings to which she had consented oniv under protest. They scrupled not. however, to feast bim liberally upon her good things; and after enjoying this re past be left the house. We were too sleepy that night to think much about the mysterious inscriptions; but next dsy they were the subject of many surmises; and by the afternoon curiosity ao far overcame the slight awe with which we bad at first regarded the prohibition, that we resolved on the bold step of examining tbe papers inquisi tive and irreverent little people that we were, encouraged somewhat, I am afraid, br Granny. Having first made sure that Nora was well out of the way, we abut ourselves op in tbe playroom, where the rate bad a favorite hole, w itu uie neip of a knitting-needle, George succeeded in extracting one or two papers. Ou each there was written rude couplet, containing some exhortation to the rats to depart from the Louse. This is the Only one I fully remember: Black rtts sod while! blue rats sod pmi! Uoduooto Mr. saoua,ad Deivr corns bstk Uis way. More merciful than Lis forefathers, our charmer had not sought to compass tbe death of tbe vermin, but only to puss the in on to the neighbors! I suppose tbe rata bad already accept ed this rythmical notice to quit; for not withstanding our interference with the proper working of the charm, my recol lection is that tbe bouse was troubled with them no more. I Chamber's Jour nal. An American View o Brazil. . Mr. John Beitler, a young Pittsburg man. who went to Brazil to seek a for tune almost seven years ago.has returned to bis home in this city. He does not give a very glowing account of the country, and states that the opportunities present ed there for the encouragement of American enterprise are not very exten sive without lsrge financial resources. It is hardly tbe place for young men of even more than ordinary pluck and energy to visit and grow up with the country, un less they have money and are prepared to grow slowly. The country is flooded with American inventions and knick knacks, and the listless Brazilians, who in former times looked upon such novel ties from the States great discoveries, have lapsed into a state of more or less indifference. The telephone has been in use for many months, tbe roller-skating as one of the sports in the large cities and other contrivances have lost their novelty. Mr. Beitler says that the na tive Brazilians are gradually becoming more "civilized" since the number of Englishmen, Americans and comers from all quarters of tbe globe are introducing customs as new to the natives as they are frequent. Rio Janeiro, with its 400,000 inhabitants, is gradually assuming metropolitan airs, and you can ride all through its paved streets in a Pennsylvania street car. Mr. Beitler reports that the country is traversed by a number of railroads, all narrow gauge, however, save the Dom Pedro road, and one which was built by English capitalists and operated by Englishmen. The former road owns 200 Baldwin locomotives. One of the best engineers on the road is a young man named Lewis, formerly of Allegheny City. Most of the other engineers are natives, and most of them know as much about the locomotive as the hind brake man. So says Mr. Beitler. The chief industry of Brazil, the cultivation of coffee, is gradually diminishing, accord ing to the same authority. Many of the planters are leaving for Central America and Mexico, which Mr. Beitler thinks is destined to become a great country for that industry. Pittsburgh Tele graph. lieasoii in Birds. Several years ago a pair of my canaries built; while tho hen was setting the weather became intensely hot. She drooped, and I began to fear that she would not be strong enough to batch the eggs. 1 watched the birds closely and soon found that the cock was a devoted nurse. He bathed in the fresh cold water I supplied every morning, then went to the edge of the nest, aud the ben buried her head iu his breast and was re freshed. Without hands and without a sponge what more could we have done? The following spring tho same bird was lisngiug in a window with three other canaries; each in a separate cage. I was sitting in the room and heard my little favorite give a peculiar cry. I looked up and saw ull the birds crouch ing on their perches, paralyzed with fright. On going to the window to ascertain the cause of their terror I saw a large balloon passing over the end of the street. The birds did not move till it was out of si'dit, w hen all gave a chirp of relief. Tho balloon was only in sight of the bird who gave tho alarm, and I have no doubt he mistook it for a bird of prey. I have a green and a yellow canary banging side by side. They are treated exactly alike and are warm friends. Ono has often refused to par take of some delicacy till the other was supplied with it. One duy I had five blossoms of dandelion; 1 gave three to the green bird, two to the yellow one. The latter flew about his cage singing in a shrill voice, and showing unmistakable signs of anger. Guessing the cuuse, I took away one of the three flowers, when both birds settled down quiety to enjoy their feast. I bpectator. Blaug Pliraicg. Perhaps no other slang phrase ever became so popular as "Whut, never?" at all events among those who speak English, savsa writer in tho Traveler. "Who struck Billy Patterson?" "Do you bruise your oats?" "Don't give it away," and others attained consider able notoriety, but the Pinafore "pug" discounted them all put together. Per haps the fuuniest rendering of it was that attributed to a friend of John Stetson, the manager, upon whom every now ioke of a tbentrical character immediately saddled. Somebody asked him whether Stetson ever spe'lled an English word correctly in bis life. The usual "What, never?"followed, and this sincere friend wound up by saying, "No, by, not even hardly ever." It was the same gentleman who was in Stetson's company one morning when they waited three hours for a metropolitan Elevated railroad train, not knowing that no trains ran on that line on Sunday. Noticing the initials 'VM. E. It. "on the stution.the frieud asked Stetson what they meant. "Methodists Episcopal railroad, ' replied John. It wasStetsen who first approached Sarah Bernhardt with a view of bringing ber to America. He armed himself with a blank check and an in terpreter and sent up bis name. His in terpreter gave him the message in reply: "Madamoiselle can not be disturbed. She is in ber room with sciatica." "Just my luck," said Stetson, testily. "Some Italian loafer always gets ahead of me." Evening toilets are to be trimmed with deep Chantilly lace flounces. T Dutch CapUln'i Derke. "Sail on stvrboard bow!" "What ia she?" asken Captain Martin Pieterson, looking anxiously in that di rection; for in tbe Eastern at as. two hundred year ago, every strange tail was a terror to the captain of a well laden Dutch merchantman. "Can t quite make ber ont yet," answered uie lookout at uie mast-head. "Looks like a brigantine she has a very I . ; i . mi it - rasisu cut, aiiogomer. The captain's face darkened and hi lips tightened. They tightened still more a few minutes later, when the look out hailed again: "She's a briganline, bearing right down upon ns. Every face among the crew seemed to harden suddenly, but no one spoke, Indeed, what need was there of words? All on board understood in a moment what was before them they were about to be attacked by pirates, and there was not a single cannon, no not even an old mnsket aboard the vessel. It was a terrible moment for them an, more lernoie siui lor the poor captain. For years Le bad been toiling and saving, bearing every kind of hardship and facing every kind of dan gor, until he had ammost made money enough to become part owner of the ship that be commanded. He bad made three successful trips in her, and was now go ing borne for good, to settle himself in a snug little bouse, on tbe great canal, at Amsterdam, with rosy-cheeked Gredel Voort, bis old neighbor's only daughter, for his wile. And now, all in a moment. be found himself face to face with a hid eous peril, which threatened bim the loss ol all he hod in tbe world, and bis liie. The crew stood looking moodily at the approaching vessel, which came sweep ing over the bright, blue sea, with its huge sails spread ont like the wings of a swan, a perfect picture of beauty, though it brought death along with it. Some of tbe bolder spirits were beginning to mut ter to each other that it would be better to set fire to their own ship, and die like men, than to be flung into the sea, like dogs, when the captain's gloomy face suddenly lighted up as nobody had ever seen it light np yet, and be burst into such a loud, hearty laugh that the doomed were struck with the greatest surprise. "Cheer up, lads," he cried, still laugh ing, "all is not over with ns yet. Come, now, knock tho head out of that cask of butter, and thoroughly smear the deck with it. Be sharp!" The men only stared blankly at him. as they thought he had gone mud; and even the stolid mate opened bis heavy mouiu in amazement. "Do you hear?" shouted the captiin. "Lock sharp, will you? there's no time to lose. Grease the whole deck, fore and aft, and the rigging, too, as high as you can reach. Y e II give the rascals a slip pery job of it, anyhow." I hen the sailors begun to understand; and the shout of laughter that broke forth would have astonished the pirates had they been within hearing. In a twinkling the deck was greasod until it fairly shone, bulwarks and all. "Now, boys, soid the captain, "on with your sea-boots, and put sand on the soles of them, to keep you from slipping, and then each one uf you take a hand spike and bo ready." lhe pirate was now so near that thev could see plainly the rabble of gaunt, sinewy Malays, woolly-headed negroes. and sallow, black-haired Portuguese that crowded her decks. A few mfnutcs more, and she ran alongside; and almost before the two vessels hail touched, threo wild figures leaped from the pirate's rig ging upon the merchantman's deck. But it was a very unlucky jump for all three. The first man spun across the slippery deck as if it bad been a skating rink, and went right out on the other side. The seoond tumbled head foremost down the hatchway into the cook's galley, whero the black cook considerately piled a heap of his iron pans upon him in order to keep him quiet. "Aha, Massa rirate," said he. grin ning, Mis ship no do 'Flying Dutch man,' him de Slip'ry Dutchman!" The third pirate had leaped on board as fiercely as if he meant to kill the w hole crew at one blow; but the only man he hnrt was himself, for he hit his bead such a whack that he almost knocked his brains out, and fell down, roaring with pain. All this so frightened the other pirates that they thought the shit must be bewitched, and rushing buck to their own vessel with a howl of dismay, made off as fust as possible. For many years after, one of the fa miliar sights of Amsterdam was a portly old gentleman with a jolly red face, at the sight of which the boys wero nsod to singing : "Oupuin Virtln PI, iProon M'ti hi hl sb il fr-1 bin ' And his wife was never tired of show ing the huge silver butter dish presented to bim in honor of his repulse of the pirate with a cask of butter. f David Ker, in Harper's Young People. Ab jht Ivfo Crows. There is nothing like making sure of results. During the war 'between Augustus Ciosar and Marc Antony, when all tho world stood wondering and un certain which way Fortune would incline herself, a poor man at Itome, in order to be prepared for making, in either event, a bold hit for bis own advancement, bad recourse to the following ingenious ex pedient: "He applied himself to the training of two crows with such dili gence that he brought them to the length of pronouncing, with great distinctness, the one a salutation to Ciosar, and the other a salutation to Antony." When Augustus returned conqueror, the man went out to meet him with a crow suited io the occasion perched on bis fist, and every now and then it kept exclaiming, "Salve, CiBsar, Victor, Imperator!" Huil, Cirsar, Conqueror and Emperor! Augustus, greatly struck and delighted with so novel a circumstance, purchased the bird of the man for a sum which im mediately raised bim into opulence. Tbe youth who parts bis hair at tbe equator, sucks tbe head of a rattan cane, squints with dreamy eyes through airy Biases, wears number five boots on num ber six feet, sports a double-breasted watch, wears a horse's hoof scarf-pin and sporting-dog studs and aays : "dueed," "aw, yes.damme," and "don't you fail to remember it," has a soft thing in this bard world. He wears it in his hat just beneath Lis usually thick skull. A Dozen ffateriaoit, A reliable traveler tells tie following about watersjioutii: We left Aspinwall on the 11th of Msy forNewiork. Tbe weather was good until the 17th. At or about balf-.t two o clock in the afternoon of that day Cap tain Williams and a number of the officers, crew and passengers were aston ished by the. appearance of a large wter. spout. I Lave seen tLii remarkable phe nomena before, but never on such a gigantic scale. The first one wM seen about six miles away. A stream of water seemed to rise from the level of the ocean, and at the same time another stream descended from the heavens and depended from a dark rain cloud like a great icicle. The two streams met about midway between aky and water, and then began to move rapidly to the east ward. The base of the waterspout ap. peared to be nearly a quarter of a mile wide, and then it tapered toward the middle into an almost imperceptible line. Suddenly it broke, and there was a mighty heaving and tumbling alwut of the waters in the vicinity. We saw twelve spouts that af ternoon during some heavy rain squalls. At one time I saw four of them at once. Thev looked like lofty spires of a cathedral. 'Through our glasses we could see that the tops of the spouts were lost in the clouds. It is a scientific fact that the di cannon in the neighborhood will always cause tnese water-columns to break. Tbe passengers insisted that the di a pistol would create sufficient vibration in tue air to uesiroy a spout which was a mile away. I loaded my revolver and fired at the snout. At the wtenn.l W it broke. I don't know whether it was the result of the firing or not, but the thing happened just as I tell you, and at least it was a remarkable coincidence. Every time a spout burst, the top part of it seemed to vanish into vapor, but the under part would rock the sea for imlo and our vessel experienced the violent enocts. in tact, all that alternoon the water was disturbed. Several times it was thoncht we wonld havn to elmncra our course, but the spouts did not ap proach too near for safety. Why lie Ate Brans for Dinner. They tell a good story about oneWv- mane.a diminutive drummer well known here and on the Comstock. He stopped one night at Deming, New Mexico, a favorite resort of the cow-boys. "Jdadame, said Abe to the landlady, "give me some dinner, and be quick about it. I have not dined since yester dav." The lady brought bim some bean soup. "Madame, take that soup away. I never eat soup. Bring on the roasts right away." The lady brought bim a large plate of pork and beans. ' Madame, take that away. I never eat those things." In vain the lady explained that pork and beans was the best tho bouse afforded. He was obdurate, and wanted roast beef, rare. A mild-mannered, blue-eyod cow-boy at the table then chipped in: "Beggin pardon, stranger, but you must excuse the lady. We " "Who aro you, sir?" retorted the drummer. "I know my business." "lou don t tell me? said the festive cow-boy, drawing his navy. "Now, yon eat them beans. I'm goin' to eat here an' see you fed. Light into 'em quick, or I'll open you, sure, and put 'em in. This is bizness with me, an' I'm shontin' in yer car." The unfortunate drummer saw blood in the air, and was forced to choke four plates of the unwelcome food down be fore the cow-boy was satisfied with his apology to the landlady. Reno Ga zette Consumption. Physicians used to hold that a fatal issne must follow the formation of tu bercles on the lun?s. So long as tuber cular formations could be arrested, there was hope of a patients recovery; but when these bad planted themselves in the lungs, their growth wss inevitable and fatal. But nature is wiser than phy sicians, and teaches those who study her ways valuable lessons. Careful dissec tion in rece it years has brought to light many curions facts. Foremost among these is the certainty that consumption, in its tubercular form, is often cured. A series of postmortem examinations in an Edinburgh hospital, disclosed the fact that the lungs of one-third of the per sons who died after 30 years of age bore marks of tubercles whose growth had been checked, and in many eases the dis ease wholly cured. Part of the lungs have even been destroyed, and - the cavities filled by the con traction aud adbesiou tof the walls. Iu some cuses brous tissue had complete ly inclosed the purts disintegratsd by the disease. If consumption is curable, as these f-cts seem to indicate, scientifio physicians will never rest till they have ascertained the most effective methods of treatment. Trap tor Sheep-Killing Dogs. The Lynchburg Yirginian describes an ingen ious trap devised by a Virginia farmer to capture sheep-killing dogs. Having suf fered severely from tbe depredations of dogs upon his sheep-fold, he built around a number of sheep that dogs bad killed an inclosure of rails twelve feet high and about ten feet square at the ground, the sides of the trap sloping inward nntil an opening was left about five feet square. Any dog could easily climb such a slop ing fence and entor the pen, but not even a grey-hound could jump out of it. In three nights the farmer captured 4C dogs.including fifteen or twenty that bad never been seen in that neighborhood this, after there bad been a public slaughter of all the dogs suspected of sheeping killing, save one, whose owner could not be convinced of bis guilt. The trap was built for his especial benefit, and it caught him the first night. "One author tells ns that he wrote 'In My Studr,' another 'In a Garden,' a third 'At'My Window,' while a fourth wrote 'In an Old Attic' Black wrote 'In Silk Attire' an effiminate taste in a man. George Sala, who was of solitary habits, wrote 'Quite Alone,' Marian Har land also wrote 'Alone.' Those who are disposed to be uneasy will never want something to be ncesey about.