The Sunday Oregonian., March 13, 1904, PART THREE, Page 19, Image 19

1$
Ticket Speculators as Critics
Broadway Wiseman Talks About Good and Bad
Shows Strange Ways o Earning a Living.
THE SIWDAY 0EEG0N1AN PORTLAND, MAECH 23, 1904.
w
jERE you arc "Want seats? Two
WTm good seats down in front. Nothing
left inside. All right, sir; trr and
pee. No, he don't want seats downstairs.
Sa's a dollar man. You'll see him come
out in a minute and go looking for the
family-circle entrance."
"Pretty slow work for you speculators
today, is It notr
"Like a twin brother to a funeral. I am
goln' to get stuck with this bunch, sure.
Eight of 'em, I think. Lemma see. Yes,
eight to the bad."
"At $2 each?"
"Two dollars, nothing, young fellow. Do
you think we buy 'em "at the box office ?"
"Don't you?"
"Not much.- They know us all too well.
"We have to get 'em from the hotel men.
Til put you wise to that. Gee! ain't it
cold?" '-J
"And do you pay the hotel men their ad
vance on the box office price?"
"Sure we do. How else? Say, don't let
em fool you. You take it from me that
we always give up $2.25 and generally $2.50
apiece for every ticket we get."
"Can't you get them from the box office
by messengers?"
"Naw. That game's played out. They're
dead on. Try it once in awhile, but It
don't pay. More fuss and bother than it's
worth."
Where the Profit Is.
"Then your profit is what you can get
for a ticket above $2.50?"
"Sure's you're a foot high. Say, you're
a reporter, ain't you? "Well, now, I tell
you right to your face, the newspapers
ain't givln' us no fair deal. I don't know
why you want to stop us from makln'
an honest living. We don't do nobody no
harm, and we are a public convenience.
Look here, I'll bet there ain't an honester
business in New York than ticket specu
latln. Why, look at the cheats in many a
store selling Connecticut cigars for Ha
vanas, and chargln' a dollar apiece for
Ellk neckties that ain't nothing but cotton,
and passing off pieces of, glass for dia
monds. Aw! It makes me tired! Why
don't they jump on them fellows?"'
"Well, never mind the ethics of the
question. Tell me what you think of the
dramatic season from the sidewalk specu
lators' standpoint."
"That's easy. Rotten!"
"Artistically or financially?"
"All kinds of ways. Say, I've been in
the business 30 years and here you are,
lady; right down in front. Yessum, rows
from the front. How many did you
want? Three? Yes, I got three right to
gether. Here they are. Best seats in the
house. Ain't nothln Inside at all no
use trying. Sure, you can see right on
the tickets where they are. In B and P,
very best seats In the house. Yessum.
Only three dollars each. Thank you.
Nine from ten is one. There's your
change, ma'am. Well, as I said, I've
been in this business for nearly 30 yeara
and I never seen anything like it is this
year. New York seems to have mighty
little use for the theater."
"Rows From the Front."
"What did you mean by telling that old
lady that the seats were 'rows from the
front'?"
"Just that. Rows from the front. That's
true, ain't it?"
"But how many rows?"
"Aw, what's the use of tellln her? If
I'd said fifth and sixth rows, she would
have wanted them in the second and third.
Then if I'd have told her these was just
as good It would have started an argu
ment and it would have been all off. Just
Set a woman to arguing and there s noth-
ng doin. You've xrot to make a snao
ntnin rmf" Vint nir (inn nn mnTipu nffnr
bgbx a game of talk.
yjiCTPu torn iier wiey were lojjetnerr
In t they? Two In E and one in
ehlnd. I told her they were In
I didn't say they was all in
wJ'
fWon't she come back and ask to
v them changed?"
"Naw. A man might, but not a woman.
Once she gets seated she won't feel like
making a fuss and coming out again.
Besides, the curtain will be goln' up in a
minute and then you couldn't drag her
out. She will want to see it all and get
her money's worth. Well, I've only got
Ave left anyway, two pairs and a single."
"Will you reduce the price now?"
"Sure; after about 15 minutes I sell 'em
for anything I can get. I'll hold up to
two and a half as long as there's any
chance of latecomers, so as to break even
If I can. and then I'll let 'em go at any old
price."
"Can you usually get rid of your stock
to late comers at cut rates?"
"No, not generally this season, if you
are carrying much of a bunch. After the
first act you might as well quit. No use
standing around and freezing for an hour
on the chance of picking up a stray dol
lar." "What do you do with the unsold
Beats?"
"Oh, of course, we figure not to have
any. Try not to overbuy. We can guess
at It pretty close after a few perform
ances. Then, If I have any left, I go In
to see the show myself or give 'em to my
folks or some of my friends."
"So you sometimes help paper the
house?"
"Sure J, -More than you would think fer
once in a while. I've known man' a show
4 (.Wf
along the street here, when the manage
ment bragged about packing the house,
and where Tve given free seats. Oh, It's
a great game, I tell you. These managers
are. the steadiest bluffers going, but we
don't want any row with them as long as
they leave us alone, and we know our
rights, too. Say, Jim, you take the other
side of the entrance. Don't stand In so
close. That fellow on the door is watchln'
you- and that young snipe will be comln'
out again with his line of talk about
keeping eight feet away."
"Are you supposed to keep eight feet
away?"
"Thafs Just an idea of some fresh
house manager. As long as we don't
block up the entrance or Interfere with
the people goln' in, we can do business
anywhere on the sidewalk. Our licenses
allow that. They won't let us stand in
the lobby, but that's a bluff, too. "What's
the odds where we stand?"
Gratuitous Boomers.
"You really think managers do not ob
ject to having you in front of the!r
houses?"
"Why should they? Ain't we plugging
their business for them all the time, help
ing to fill the houseand cracking up the
show to everybody that comes along?
Say, they ought to pay us for advertising
their shows. "We never knock 'em. We
always plug 'em. No use telling a man
it's a bum show and try to sell him a
ticket to it at the same time, is there?
That would be clean dotty. I'll gamble
I've told more lies about New York shows
than I'll ever get forgiven for."
"What are the easist attractions to sell
tickets for?"
"The most successful, of course. No
use trying to sell tickets to a dead one.
Tickets for tonight! Here you are, sir!
Tickets! Boxoffice prices. Give you best
seat in the house. Yes, sir, right there;
you can see on the diagram for yourself.
Center of the house. Yes, sir, it's- the
best show on Broadway. All the papers
say so. Turn people away every night.
Not a seat left in there. No. you haven't
missed anything at all; curtain's only just
gone up. Theres a pair of seats you can
see everything from. Five dollars. That's
right Well I'm not going to get stuck
so much after all!"
"Why did you tell him boxoffice price?"
"It is Just what I paid for them. I
didn't make a cent." n
"Is it a good show?"
"Worst ever, if you want to know on
the level. There's enough paper gone in
there tonicht to half fill the house. I
wouldn't be sellln' tickets here If I hadn't
been stuck by buyin' 'em before I found
out about it I was nipped that time. A
case of too aulck. You can tell the show
that's goln' down hill every time. The
women stand around and look anxious
and the men seem to bo afraid of get
ting in the line. People who have paid
for their tickets rush right up to the
door as though they owned the place."
No Harvest This Year.
"Are you going to come out even on
the season?"
"Great Scott no! "We stand to lose
this year about all we made in the last
ten years. There are no new 'specs' In
the business this year. Nothln in it fer
them."
"The business is better now than it was
at the beginning of the season, Is It not?"
"Yes. It has picked up a bit lately. You
see. it opened with a lot of poor attrac
tions, and so the public wouldn't go.
Then came the Chicago fire, and that
knocked everything out and then the
bad weather didn't help any. We didn't
need either the fire or the cold in our
business not. to speak of."
"What class of shows has been dolus
the best?"
"None. Some of the big stars have
done fairly well for a while, and the
opera has helped us out a lot but there
have been too many tame musical shows.
The public seems to have been overfed
with them. You can't lay any rule down
this year, though. Some shows that
have been 'way up in art have been 'way
down at the box office. And then again
some silly thing has caught 'em good.
Tickets? Tickets for tonight? Best seat
In the house for a dollar. No, he's noth
ing. Only a programme hunter."
"And what's a programme hunter?"
"There's a lot of folks do that Mostly
women at the matinees, though. They
go In the lobbies just to pick up a pro
gramme If they can."
"What for?"
"Just to take home and four-flush
their friends about havin seen the show.
Make out they have been to the theater
and flash the programme to prove It
Want their friends to think they are
great patrons of the theater, you know.
Talk a lot of guff about the actors and
pretend to know some of 'cm. Nothing
but four-flushing all the time."
'Are there many speculators in New
York?"
"Quite a number. Just 81, if I remem
ber right"
"Are out of town people pretty good
customers?"
"Only the drummers. The yaps had
rather stand in the line for two hours
than pay a quarter extra. Here's one
now. Looks like he came from up the
state. Guess I can land him. Tickets,
tickets, sir? Best neat in the house for
half a dollar. There you are. That's
all he'd pay, and I'd rather have the 50
cents than the ticket"
ADMIRAL URIU AT 'ANNAPOLIS
A Classmate Tells Stories of the Little Jap He "Was a
Good Fellow and Was Graduated Well Up 7ith Class
New York Sun.
VER the cpffee and cigars at the
Delaware Society dinner on Thurs
day night William H. Stayton, for
merly of the United States Navy and
now a lawyer In the city, told some .sto
ries of his old Naval Academy classmate,
Sotoklchl TJrlu, now Rear-Admlral of the
Japanese fleet that turned out to be such
a surprising proposition to the Russians.
"Congress passed an act back in the
'70s allowing Japan to send one cadet a
year to the Naval Academy on payment
of their pro rata, share of the actual ex
penses. "Japan bunched her privileges and sent
four cadets at one time. They entered In
the class of 'SL. TJrlu was one of these
and Yunoskl Enoye, a nephew of the Mi
kado, was- another. These two chaps
roomed together. "We cadets heard that
this was done at the Mikado's request
and we naturally -concluded that TJrlu
was of noble blood, tqo.
"At that time class feeling was very
strong In Japan. Unless a man was of
noble blood he could not address even the
remotest ramification of the royal fam
ily without humbling himself to the
ground. Neither Enoye nor Uriu showed
the slightest trace of class arrogance,
however. They were simply good fel
lows well met like all the rest of us.
But It afterward leaked out from a
roundabout source that Uriu belonged to
the laboring class, the' lowest in the
Japanese social scale.
"As a youngster Uriu was of an In
quiring, mechanical turn of mind. He
hvas the kind of a fellow that could take
watch to pieces and then put it . to
gether again. A. wandering English car
t-enter came to uriu's native village, and
ne progressive znue jap saw mat here
an opportunity to learn a new lan-
age. lie scraped an acquaintance with
e carpenter, and got him to teach him
e English language as the cockney la-
rer knows It in spite of his academy
training Uriu's English Is still well fla
vored with cockneylsms.
VThen Uriu heard of the competitive
examination that was to be held at the
Royal School of Toklo for the Naval
Academy appointments. It was under
stood that the examination was to be
open only to the sons of the nobility. But
Uriu presented himself jusf the same,
and asked to be examined. Japan had
already broken pretty well- away from her
old feudallstic ideas. The workingman's
son was admitted to the examinations,
and he carried off one of the prizes. It
was the Mikado's Idea that a chap who
had proved himself the mental equal of
the three other Japs who were going to
Annapolis should be put on the same
social level. It was for this reason that
he requested that Uriu and his nephew
should room together.
"Uriu was very popular with the Acad
emy boys. He proved his spunk on a
number of occasions, but what the fel
lows liked about him was his "absolute
squareness. McGiffen, that roving fight
er who afterward became mentally un
balanced as the result of wounds received
In the battle of the Yalu River and who
committed suicide in the Post Graduate
Hospital, was a classmate of ours. He
once said of Uriu: 'That fellow's the
only real Christian In the Academy.'
The description fitted him so weU that
he becstae known as 'the real Christian'
-a. name that stuck to him throughout
his Academy days.
"When he entered the Academy he got
a good old-fashioned Annapolis hazintr
like all the other fellows, and he stood
It like a major. When he became an
upper classman and privileged to haze
the" incoming fledglings, he also lived un
to the Academy traditions. He weighed
only about 115 pounds, and was one of
the smallest fellow In the Academy I
remember seeing him get hold of "big
George Ferguson, now an assistant en
gineer of the Brooklyn Bridge.
"-"What's your name? demanded Uriu.
"Ferguson, sir.
"" 'Spelllt'
I
m
SPRING OFFERINGS IN
CARPETS AND DRAPERIES
a
AXMINSTERS ARE ARTISTIC
The most beautiful of all parlor or drawing-room fabrics. We are showing the most extensive line ever
brought to Portland. They come in the newest designs and most artistic color blendings ever shown in this,
city. If you are hard to please, we want you to see them. Sewed, laid and lined, per yard, Si.50
$1.60-1.75-$l.&0-$2.10-$2.50. . ' Is.
WILTONS WEAR WELL
There are the Carpets for hard wear and tear. They don't show dust quickly, as they come in dull'
tones in the smaller Oriental figured designs. Appropriate for libraries, dining-rooms, halls and stairways.
They stand the work and always look well. Wilton Velvets and Fine Wiltons, per yard, sewed,-laid and
lined, $1.50-?1.65-$1.80-2.00-$2.5$3.50.
INGRAINS ARE INDISPENSABLE
For good looks and economy, the Ingrain Carpets are hard to equal. We've just received a carload of the
celebrated PAEK MILLS FIRST QUALITY, ALL-WOOL, EXTRA SUPERFINE INGRAIN" CARPETS.
We're showing these pretty patterns in our front window. Just the thing for bedroom and nursery. The
colors are as fast as carpet colors can be made. Sewed, laid and lined, per yard, 90 and 1.15.
BEAUTIFUL BODY BRUSSELS
There is no carpet mAre widely known than Body Brussels, none more universally used,
at we have a beautif assortment of the very latest patterns, suitable for bedroom, s
On that ac
count we have a beautify assortment of the very latest patterns, suitable for bedroom, sitting-room or
nursery. The newest- defigas are reproductions of Old English Tauestries. They're most attractive. Lots
-of worth for a little moae. Sewed, laid and lined, per yard, 1.65 and 1.75.
I DAINTY DRAPERIES
Some new effects in artistic draperies have just arrived and are on display in our
Drapery Department. Of course, you'll want to see these. They're the prettiest
we.'ve ever shown.
PANAMA BURLAPS, 50 inches wide in dainty olive and. terra cotta shades.
Appropriate for hangings used in combinations with Mission and Colonial decoration.
FOLIAGE TAPESTRIES, in artistic designs, 50 inches wide, for hangings and
mural decoration. Some of these are woven with continuous patterns and make beau
tiful friezes.
FRENCH CRETONNES, 32' inches wide, Dresden stripes, floral patterns and
Renaissance designs on cream and tan fields. These dainty fabrics are adaptable for
hangings and fine upholstery work. Absolute novelties.
WOOL TAPESTRIES, 50 inches wide, Old English, Heraldic and Floral designs
on green, terra cotta, cream and tan fields.
YOUR CREDIT pfgc
IS GOOD . MltBKUl
MAKE YOUR
OWN TERMS
" 'F-e-r-g-u-s-o-n; sir.'
" 'Spell It over again, and remember
that you're addressing your superior.'
" F sir-e slr-r slr-g slr-u slr-s slr-o
shn sir. Ferguson, sir.'
"Uriu was converted to Christianity
while at the Academy, and though he
returned to Japan Immediately after
graduating, he has remained a Christian.
He Joined the Academy branch of the
T. M. C A. Every now and then he
would go to McGiffen, who was a wild,
turbulent character who steered very shy
of religious services, and ask him to go
to Y. M. C A. services.
"McGiffen never refused these requests
of Uriu, but there was not another man
In the Academy who could have got Mc
Giffen anywhero near a church.
"Uriu gave us one splendid exhibition
of his spunk. His countryman, Serata,
had stumbled during a drill and dis
charged his rifle. It was loaded only with
a blank cartridge, but the wad struck
a man in the front rank and inflicted an
ugly-looking scalp wound.
"Serata toofc the thing very much to
heart. He "went to his room and kept
bemoaning the injury he had done his
classmate. Six or eight of us fellows
went to tell him that everybody knew
It was an accident and to come out and
join the crowd.
"Uriu had already gone to Serata' s
room, "When he heard us coming he
Jumped to the conclusion . that we were
going to. thrash Serata. He began to
barricade the door, with furniture, but
we were too quick for him and forced
an entry.
"There wasn't one of us who was not
big enough to throw little Uriu over his
head, but Uriu sailed Into the whole
crowd and fought like a devil. Of course
It took only a minute to pin him down
and explain our mission. In his studies
Uriu was always weak in grammar, rhe
toric and American history, but In all
other subjects he stood about sixth or
seventh in a class of 133. At graduation
he stood fourteenth. The graduation of
tho Mikado's nephew was more a mark
of our friendship for Japan than a tes
timonial of the young man's fitness for
that honor.
4rWhile at the Academy Uriu met a
Japanese girl who was a Vassar stu
dent; and they subsequently married.
"So that we can keep tab on our old
classmates, our class society regularly
sends out printed slips asking: 'How old
are you? 'Are you xrled?' 'Have you
any children?' and other personal ques
tions. Uriu always responds. The last
time we heard from him he said that
he was 43 years old, had five children,
and added that English was the lan
guage of his household from the children
up."
THE COURSE OF TRUE LOVE.
Far From Smooth Did It Run In This
December-May Case.
Chicago Inter Ocean.
Although all the world loves a lover,
and although Samuel Michaels, the lover
In. tills case. Is TO, and deserving of more
than ordinary consideration, it is impos
sible to approve of his violently affection
ate course in the case of En la Burns,,
aged 16.
Miss Burns, it. appears, is a domestic in
the Shock home, a name peculiarly ap
propriate to this love story, as, will be
seen when all the facts are brought out
Enla Burns spurned the advances o
Samuel JMIchaels. She would not give him
a ipeg to hang- his hopes upon. She would
not see him. She would not permit him
to see her, "
The Shock home Is situated In the coun
try. Needless to say, it Is situated in the
country contiguous to Kokomo, Ind. It
was a Structure of brick valued at $4000.
To demonstrate the intensity of his love
for Enla Burns, Samuel Michaels, It Is
alleged, conspired wlh certain others tn
shock the Shock home with dynamite,
which they proceeded to do. and the shock
almost killed Enla.
However, being a resident of that part
of the State of Indiana which lies con
tiguous to Kokomo, Enla recovered from
the shock, and, much to Samuel Michael's
satisfaction, as establishing the soundness
of his theory of love-making, she began
to exhibit a decided change in her feelings
toward him. She even agreed to an elope
ment, and In the fullness of his happiness
her ancient suitor not only confessed the
part he had taken In shocking- the Shock
home, but gave her other Information
which goes to show that with the assist
ance, of his confederates he was about to
dynamite other houses where she was in
the habit of staying from time to time.
The sequel to all' this Is that Samuel
Michaels, "William "Wagner; Mrs. William
"Wagner and John Bowqn are now1 locked
up in the Kokomo Jail, while Enla Burns
Is. expected In the forthcoming trial to
XumUfa. tiieac e vhlch-xU? 4es t&eaj all
to the penitentiary. And the moral pf all
this Is that you can never tell exactly
what a shocked girl will do.
Farming on Shares.
On some large estates of the wheat dis
tricts of New South 'Wales, . farming on
the share system Is extensively pursued.
Under this sysfem the landholder pro
vides the land and the seed, while the
farmer finds the plant and labor. The al
lotment of tho harvest Is, of course, based
on individual agreements between the par
ties concerned and varies accordingly; but
In all cases the division is characterized by
equitable terms. In certain Instances it
is agreed that the first two- bags of grain
per acre go. to the farmer, the third go
ing to the landholder. Should the yield
exceed three bags tho farmer takes the
excess. As. the average yield per acre
during the present season approaches 20
bushels, tho.share-system farmer, working
on such a basis', of division, has every rea
son to congratulate himself.
Should not miss the delightful trip up
and down the Columbia River. Parties