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About Morning Oregonian. (Portland, Or.) 1861-1937 | View Entire Issue (May 1, 1914)
OREGONIAN, FKLDAY, MAY 1. 1914. -
" " " " - i i i i , - . . . i
BUSH TO REGISTER
'Wrist-Bracelet Man' and 'Old
Beau Flirt' Companions to
, 'Mrs. Know-Her-Mind.'
PLAID WAIST IS PATIENT
Husband Tell "Wives Their Politics,
Women Dcxlge Their Ages and.
Giggly Girls Look Vise
in Cafeteria-Like Line .
BY LEONE CASS BAER.
That poet who sun? of "woman's
infinite variety" must at some time
have held down a job as clerk In tile
registration office at the County Court
house. Por women's infinite variety and
man's woeful lack of anything that
even smacks of variety is nowhere so
abundantly emphasized as at that Ions,
never-ending table where the popula
tion of Portland files past cafeteria
wise, a long, patient, (slow-plo,dding
line, each awaiting turns. It's a long
registration lane that has no turning,
but this one looked to me as if, like
somebody's brook, it just went on for
ever. It had all the esthetic atmosphere
of a line in waiting at the stamp win
dow at Christmas time, with none of
the attendant holiday spirit.
Stool of the Mlshtr Given.
I galloped over to get some impres
sions early yesterday morning and Mr.
I-dldn't-get-his-first-name Gilgas, who
is John Coffey's prime assistant, let
me sit on a stool in the realms of the
mighty and wait for whatever turned
up. I sat between two mighty pretty
girls, one wearing a plaid waist that
would make Harry Lauder's riots in
color seem orthodox and the other girl
had dined on green onions. So I im
mediately felt among friends, for I, too,
had partaken of green onions. The
plaid girl I discovered wasn't a girl at
all, in spite of her youthful face and
big, happy eyes, but a girl-woman, with
a wonderful baby boy at home, who
thought his -mother must be a million
aire because jhe owned the Courthouse.
One touch of baby and a breath of
ontons made us three close kin. We
got so gabby that one acidulated fem
inine party querulously inquired if she
"couldn't get waited on," in just the
tone some women reserve for tired-to-death
'Plaid" and "ObIom" Impervious.
But the chatter of those who regis
tered did not interrupt the workgirls
behind the counter any more than the
plunking of steam pipes.
The observations of some of the
would-be George Ades were like unto
cheap perfume, offered in quantity, not
When one beetle-browed man with a
high collar why. oh why, is this com
bination inevitable wagged a fat fore
finger, clad in a green stone ring, in
what he fondly believed was a roguish
manner at my plaid-waist-girl and in
quired if she couldn't tell he was not
over 40, I waited in fear and trembling
to hear what she'd say.
What she did say was a polite query,
addressed sweetly to a little, old lav-ender-and-grey
woman, whose hat was
pathetically youthful for her- eager,
wrinkled face, and whose jubilant, ex
uberant, juvenile spirits were a direct
contradiction to the 60 years she re
corded on her card.
Trillion of Cards in Stacks.
Oh, those cards! Millions and tril
lions of them, they lay in nice little
heaps before the clerks.
As fast as the pile got a little, low
someone stacked up a lot more. Every
body was handed one of them and told
to write his or her own name at the
bottom line. A few clever literary
lights filled out the entire card with
enthusiasm and a lead pencil, only to
have my onion-girl or my plaid-girl
curb their ambitions by tearing the card
In twain and remarking cheerfully:
"Now we will fill this out again,
please, with pen and ink, please."
The only sign .of personal individ
uality nine out of 10 married women
displayed at the counter was the color
of their eyes and a few sundry moles
or freckles. Beyond that they radiated,
reflected and spelled the consciousness
of their wedding rings.
"Shall I put down the Mrs.." became
the bromidic question- of those who
were allowed by law to ask it. It was
a sort of triumphant, chirpy question.
Bachelor Girls Revenged.
The 'unringed sisters had their silent
revenge when they looked at the usual
husband, who Accompanied the usual
wife, and realiKeoShow the usual wife
must have loathed working for a living
to have wedded.
Man is not. by any stretch of imagin
ation, the noblest work of God at the
registration booth. Also, you might
as well appeal to the high honor of a
cat looking on the cream when it foara
eth in the cream Jug as to appeal to the
sense of humor of a woman when she
is giving her. age at the registration
booth. That is one place where figures
do He. The tenderest spot in women's
make-up is how many snows and Win
ters they have witnessed. But it is
easier to hide your most brilliant light
under the proverbial bushel than to
keep your age dark by asking to "please
be put down as over 21."
Ace Fur Baffles Psychologists.
Why It is so, psychologists and para
graph writers have never really stum
bled on in answer, but woman's sense
of honor suffers an awful blow the
minute someone mentions her age. And,
right along In the same line, it is the
registration book and the kodak evil
that teaches us women that truth is
truly stranger and more wild than any
fiction. As an ally, one woman is as
helpful to another in making out a reg
istration blank as is kerosene to a fire
fighter. "Will It hurt if Hezzie writes my card
for me?" queried one agitated little
woman. "Hezzie is my daughter and
I've got my gloves on." which combina
tion of relationship and excuse for not
writing seemed self-explanatory.
"Put me down a Pro-hi-bish-lon-ist
every time," boomed a wee. little man
with a voice clear out of any sense of
proportion. And my wife is prohibi
tionlst, too, aren't you. Babe?"
Babe nodded assent. She weighed
over sun ana coma listen to her hus
band call her Babe and not laugh right
Wives Dearled Into Parties.
All the married men affixed
"dearie" of some variety, according to
the man's methods, when he told his
wife what her politico were. This
brought the observation from my plaid
Birl that it may be bad manners to be
polite to your wife in company and to
call her soft nothings before other
women, but it's a darned good policy,
always. Women are such peculiar
chemicals that, just by adding a dash
of matrimony and politics, even the
ioro. can t tell what will hanoen.
As politicians women are mostly, as
a class, inclined to practicing lnvgen
eral rather than specializing. Thev cer.
tainly io flaunt that clinging vine stuff
you're what I am, you're a ," and
then he names the party they affiliate
wim as a combine.
Men Fear Wife Is Cheated.
That is the way it is done. And how
he does watch while the clerk writes
down the wife's age, name, color,
weight, shoe size, bust measure and
favorite actress and breakfast food. He
is bo afraid the city is going to cheat
his wife, and he is there to show them
it can't be done.
They stand with their mental backs
to the door of the closet where leers
the family skeleton. If only married
men and women stuck to their vows
as they stuck to each other in that
long registration line, -1 know one
court that would have considerable less
use for an alimony bureau. That is
one spot where man, mere man, has
his innings, all his just deserts. The
pretty little Mrs. who shared his name
and politics may scoff at his religion
or lack of it; she may insult his intel
ligence, his relatives and his friends:
she may absorb his time and his income
and pry into his secrets and his pock
ets, but there is one place where he
reigns a king. That Is in the line at
the registration desk.
When an occasional woman discov
ered she knew as much as her life
critic who patronized her, it struck her
dumb, but not with admiration.
As for the men, they wrote their
cards as cautionsly as though they were
writing ior fame, or publication and
posterity. It was certainly a great
old place for any unmarried girl to
grab a working knowledge of men,
without having to go through the mat
rimonial Inquisition t get it.
Forelgnr Lift Their Hats.
Foreigners, who had to unearth their
naturalization papers, and who chatted
volubly, displayed a splendid sense of
reverence, and maybe patriotism, by
lifting their caps from their heads
when they took the oath.
One woman glibly related that she
was 28 and had lived In Oregon 32
years. One dear old German man,
when asked about his party, beamed
and brokenly replied that he had quite
a party, six children. My onion girl
said she wouldn't call that a party,
she'd call it a visitation.
Two out of ten people raised their
left hands instead of the right when
taking the oath and then giggled nerv
ously and -invariably asked:
"Do you have many make that mis
take? Watch-Bracelet , Man There.
Watch-bracelet man got peeved
dreadfully and went away in a huff be
cause he couldn't tell the cross streets
he lived between.
"I'll not register," he said indignant
ly, and looked disappointed because
someone didn't run after him and beg
him to please come back. When they
lived on a corner they lived there, and
you couldn't pry them off. As the
names of all the various states were
reeled off, former homes of these pres
ent Portianders. I thought what a dan
dy place It would be to recruit members
for state societies.
And, oh, that word housewife. One
woman highly resen'ed the query if
she were a housewife.
"Indeed, I'm not," she said. "I don't
do anything. I am married."
Lots of women cpme back and change
their politics, after a conference with
their husbands or relatives.
And, oh, the cunning babies! When
father and mother both came a-regis-tering.
baby cotnes along, too, in his
cart or in daddy's arms. My plaid
girl and my onion girl had their eyes
open for the babies and anyone who
trotted into that mob with a baby had
it lifted right over the desk and father
and mother came into the quiet of the
Inside ring and got their registration
Woman Discovers Own Mind.
One woman, in a friendly row with
her husband, said emphatically that
she "knew her own mind." I wondered
why she boasted of the acquaintance.
Old ladies,' whose ideas of politics
were as prim and old-fashioned as a
haircloth settee with crochetted tidy
on its back, scurried in to register and
J"ounS. eiddy elrls, who giggled under
their pie hats, and business men, smug
and direct, whose idea of registering
was to poke an electric button and
have it over quickly, herded into a line
beside jnore horny-handed sons of toil
than I ever saw outside of a Labor day
Yesterday was the next to the" last
day and I think all Portland hurried
down to do Its duty. . Duty was wrlt
large. Their faces spelled it, their words
spoke it. And it Is a difficult thing to
keep our faces and the contents of our
heads separate, itsn't it?
CIVIL SERVICE BOARD SUED
H. A. IVster Endeavors to Rave
Xante Put on List City Eligible.
Man d am n mitt tA t .
Llvil Service Commissioners- to place
ot . a. foster on the liBt
of elittiblen fnr u ; .
i i . .n.;i 1 1. a r m. mem
ber of the fire department was filed
' "r Aiiorncy .rowers. Circuit
Judge McGinn cited John P. Logan A.
E. Clarke and G. W. Caldwell to 'ap
pear next week ajid show cause why
the writ should not be issued.
rosier alleges that at an examina
tion several months ago he stood sec
ond highest among more than 100 ap
plicants for appointment, despite which
fact the commlMinnAF.
put his name nnh. l ! -. 1 1 . . ,
- ..ow cilglDieB.
The refusal is persisted In. Attorney
Powers said, because Foster was dis
charged from the police department
several years ago.
BATTLE OF BALLOTS RAGES
Friends of Candidates for Queen In
creases Efforts for Votes.
With Onlv 16 daVR m nr. , Kallnt-.
the 26 candidates in th. ....... .....
queen of the Rose Festival and their
inenas are working with renewed en
ergy for votes. Besides the dancinr
parties and entertainments given by
some organization! havinv
in the contest, to raise funds- with
wnicn to keep their standard-bearers
i on me oinciai tally, some are
making a vigorous canvass by appeal
ing tO DatrOnS Of mnvfni. nlptn.. . v.
tsrs where votes are given away with
The sales of special coupons from
. "-- ' ten votes
for a cent, are brisk.
GRETCHEN HUEY IN LEAD
Milwankie Will Crown Queen of May
The Milwaukie School will hold May
Day festivities in Crystal Park today,
when a queen of May will Be crowned.
The girl receiving the highest votes In
a contest now in progress will be
queen. The vote yesterday stood:
Gretchen Huey, 3487: Helen Kelly,
1654; Charlotte Nash. 1072; Florence
K-lng. 622: Lenora Mulder, 619; Mae
urasie. 339; Doris Martin. 382; Olivia
Johnson, 292; Harriet Nichols. 277
Blanche Hopwood, 249; Rachael Blrke
meter, 235; Marie Cully, 213.
Voting has been in progress during
the week. The four candidates closest
to tne winner win be the queen's at
Ashland. Resident Passes.
ASHLAND, Or.,-Anril 30. (SneciaLl
Louis R Ulen, an old and well-known
resident of this locality, died April "58,
asea t years, no leaves a wife, also
four sons, who are scattered through
Baseball, Tennis, Golf and Athletic Goods of All Kinds at Lowest Prices-Headquarters for Fishing Tackle, Camp Supplies
Go-Carts, Baby Carriages, Bicycles, Tricycles, Coasters and Wheel Goods in Great Assortment-Let Us Quote You Prices
today with all cash
purchases in Bakery
Dept., Fourth Floor.
Olds,Worttnan Jr King
Reliable Merchandise Reliable Methods
Store Hour- 9 A. II. to 6 P.M. Every Business Day Saturday Included
Shop Here in
Broad, well - lighted
aisles, fresh, pure air
and courteous, obligius:
salespeople the ideal
place to shop !
Friday's Moneis-Saving Opportunities
Two Specials in Women's Coats
$16.65 and $18
Garment Salons, Second Floor Season's latest effects for women and
misses. Some have the much-desired flounced skirt. These are shown
- in jaunty half-length models. Others in tailored styles with fancy collars
and cuffs and belt across back. New drop-shoulder or kimono sleeves.
Materials employed are chiefly serges, novelty mixtures, plaids and checks.
luousn mere are some or r.neiisri T "W P - r -m -
tweeds and crepes. A11 sizes. Priced
New Suits, Special $22.98
Suit Salons, Second Floor Novelty wool crepes, poplins, serges, gabar
dines and many other weaves, in full line of the newest shades, including
tango and the wanted greens. Coats in cutaway, belted or box back
- " i. ii"-", bii&s aim out tons, oingie and
double-flounced skirts; also peg-top and draped effects. CQQ Q O
Best of materials and superior tailoring. Priced, special pWWa0
Crepe de Chine and Silk Waists $3.98
$8.5Q Wool Sweaters $4.49
Second Floor Beautiful new Waists of
crepe de chine, pongee, Jap and tub silks
in a variety of fashionable colors. New
effects with low neck, short sleeves ; some
with fancv Vokft pffprta nihnra -n-ith enft
' collars and cuffs of 1
These beautiful Waists j?Q QO
go on sale Friday only at J'OaiO
Second Floor Special Friday sale wom
en's all-wool Sweaters, "Ruff -Neck"
and "Bvron Collar" kIvIps in
f red-, white, gray and tan. Some have'
Deits, others coat style with patch pock
et. Odd lines from our repular stock,
selling up to $8.50. For j?5 5 O
Friday they go, special Pari7
Child's Wash Dresses 98c
. Parasol to Match FREE
Center Circle. Main Floor Another lot of those
pretty Wash Dresses- here for today's selling:.
i o - uamuiaj , an iu.il, uiuk una
u.Ui, iiiiuiucu uu Binjjcs ana caecKS to I
French and Buster styles in sizes for little
2 to 6 vears nf sura PufocaI a( cumA -.t
nals FREE with each of .these QO
Dresses sold today at only, special 70 C-
Girls9 Bloomer Dresses
Center Circle, Main Floor These attractive littl
Hloomer Dresses are made of good quality per
cale in assorted light and dark colors, in stripes
and checks. Bloomers of same material as Dress.
Shown in all sizes from 2 to 6 years. 7Ckf
Priced,, extra special, for Friday, each
S. & H. Trading Stamps given with purchases.
'Baby Week9 Sale Infants' Needs
Continues Friday and Saturday
Department Second Floor Only two more days of the "Baby Week"
sale. Entire stock now at special reduced prices. Arnold's Knit
Goods and Reuben's Shirts are included. Take advantage of this sale.
All Hand-made Dresses and Skirts
in sizes up to 2 years t
are now offered at VI
Crib Pads, special now at 39
All Hand-emb. Jackets and Wrap
pers of silk or cassi- fm '(ff
more, now on sale at -ff
Double White Blankets now 79
Main Floor Used extensively for
millinery, sashes and trimming.
We show these much desired Rib
bons in all widths and qualities.
SVz-inch Moire Taffeta, yard 25
SVi-inch Imported Moire at 55
7y2-inch Imported Moire at 65
BYz-ta. Domestic Moire, yd, 45
8- inch Heavy Faille Moire at 95
9- inch Moire Taffeta, yard, 85
Bows and sashes fashioned free of
charge by experienced bow makers.
Fine heavy quality black Moire
Ribbon for sashes, bows and mil
linery trimming. 7'2 Sj
inches wide. Special at"-
Men's Shoes, Worth to $6.00 for $3.85
Women's $3.00 to $S.OO Slippers, Pair $2.48
j 1 - 1 1 -. c ijuuk aatm uoioniais. Satin
Pumps, Gunmetal Colonials with steel
buckles, Gunmetal with tailored bows. Pat
ent Colt Colonials and Tailored
Effects, Tango Ties of patent
leather, and "Mary Jane" styles of
Kid, Louis XV leather, Cuban and
low heels J3, X4 and 5 Slippers.
DEPT. MAIJT FLOOR Hundreds of
pairs Men's High-Grade Shoes In
cluded In this special offering.
Button and' lace styles In all the
popular lasts. Special lines bought
way under the regular price,
sizes and widths. Shoes
worth up to S a pair.
- the Pair
Main Floor "Kavser cel
ebrated "Wonderfoot" Silk
Hose for women. Universally
sold at $2.00 pair. g f ?Q
Friday sale, pair P Ui7
500 pairs Men's High-grade Shoes in latest English lasts, in Tan Russia,
Tan Willow and Tan Calf also in all popular black leathers Button and
Lace styles. Standard $6 Shoes, all sizes and widths. Priced extra special, pr.
Main Floor Women's $2.50
White Lambskin Gloves, in 16
button length. Overseam sewn
styles. Reg. $2.50 fl 7 i CZ
Gloves. Friday at
Sale Men's Suits
Men's Store, Main Floor Our famous "OWK
Special" men's and young men's Suits are tai
lorednot MADE. Smartest new Spring mod
els in cheviots, worsteds and cassimeres in the
very latest patterns and colorings. Sizes for
stouts, slims and regulars. Un- JJ W O ET
commonly good Suits at only H
Men's $1.50 Shirts at $1.15
Men's 25c Hose at 19c Pair
s "Devon" Shirts,
with detachable soft col
lars and soft cuffs. Good
assortment of neat pat
terns, and all sizes. The
regular $1.50 Shirts. Now
sale at f 1 GZ
Men's Balbriggan Underwear
shirts and drawers, in full line of
all sizes. Regular 50o quality
at, special, 3 for $1.00 O CZf
or, priced, the garment
Men's reg. 25c "OWK"
Hose in black, tan and
assortment of good shades.
Double heel and toe. Sup
ply your Hosiery needs to
day at a great IQp
saving. 25c grades "-
Men's Straw Hats
Complete showing new Straws
Panamas, Sennets, bplit Yachts,
Milans and various styles and in
all sizes. See win- J?C T f
dow. Priced $2 to pO.iJVJ
Boys' $7.50 Suits $4.65
Extra Pair of Pants Free
Dept. Main Floor Made of splendid woolen materials in
beautiful new Spring patterns. Norfolk and double
breasted styles. Sizes for boys 5 to 17. Gi C?C?
buits worth up to $.50. Your choice at Vr'c
$2.50 Wash Suits 98c
Ages 2V2 to 7 .
Main Floor 200 boys' Wash Suits of repps,
percales and madras, in many handsome
patterns. Russian style. Suits that are
worth up to $2.50. - For Friday HO.
they go on sale at, extra special
Ask for Green Stamps
Boys' $1.5Q Felt Hats
Main Floor Odd lines boys'
Scratch and Felt Hats, from reg
ular stock. Broken sizes to be
closed out at once. Grays, browns
and blues.' Regular $1.50 Q
Hats, special Friday atOC
Children's Straw Hats
$l.QO to $6.00
Main Floor Parents are invited
to inspect our complete showing
of boys' and children's Straw
Hats. In all sizes. All styles.
These Straw Hats ff
priced at $100 to V JU
Boys 50c Shirts Friday at 43S-Special one-day sale of Boys'
Percale and Chambray Shirts. Cut in full styles with military Jj Q-
collars. Splendid assortment of dark patterns. All sizes k&C
Women9s Leather Handbags
tfniiirifsrWWrr mri V
Department, Main Floor Shown in real seal, pin
seal, morocco and fancy calf. "Very latest styles and
sizes in all the wanted colors. Gilt, gunmetal, nickel
and German silver frames. Kid. and silk lined, with
com purse. Exceptionally well-made, CO CZfk
stylish Handbags. Special Friday
Main Floor Women 's All-Silk
Parasols in plain and fancy col
ors. Regular and tanso shapes.
Regular $2.50 2J T QCf
Parasols, special P itO
$3.QO Pillow Cases
Embroidered Initial and
Main Floor Latest novelty
"Day, Pillow Cases" to put on
pillows during the day only. Extra
good quality materials, with
dainty scalloped ends and embroi
dered initiaL, To introduce this lat
est idea, we will sell the regular
$3 values, one day ffp T
Friday special pair
Ask for Stamps
9 9 Moth
At Vz Price
Dept. Main Floor Protect yonr clothes
without mothballs. Instead of packing
your clothes away in tar paper, cam
phor and mothballs, buy "Wayne" Ce
dared Paper Wardrobes. They are dust
proof, moisture-proof and moth-proof.
Priced Friday at just regular price.
65c Wardrobes for 33
75c Wardrobes for 38
11.00 Wardrobes for 50
?1.25 Wardrobes for 63
Friday for 75c
Grocery Dept., Fourth Floor Special Friday offer Bur-bank "$L00
Garden "package containing one 25c package and eleven 10c packages
Burbank's garden seeds; total value, $1.35, all for 75c. Sweet Peas,
Poppies, Zinnia, Pinks, Marigold, Morning Glory, Egyptian Rose, etc.;
also one 25c package Burbank's Rainbow Corn a beautiful production
blooms all Summer variegated leaves. Buy a Burbank Gar-'TCJ-a
den Friday. Regnlar price $1.00, offered for one day only at OC
Specially Priced for Friday: -
Guaranteed Quality Taney Shapes
Teaspoons, set of six at only GOc
Dessertspoons, set of six at 99
Tablespoons, set of six at $1.20
Dessert Forks, set of six, 99
Table Forks, set of six. S1.20
Table Knives, set of six at $1.40
Sugar Spoons special, each, 24
Beautiful French Gray Finish.
Salad Forks, set of six at 1 ?
Oyster Forks, set of six for 95
Berry Spoons, special, now 59
Butter Knives, special now at 32
Long-Handled Pickle Fork at 32
Cold Meat Forks, now only 40
Cream Ladles, special each, 32
Fourth Floor "Bull's Eye"
Play Suits are extra well made
entirely different from the or
dinary "play suits" sold about
town. Good materials are used
and the trimmings are of real
leather. Visit the Toy Store to
day and inspect these :
Indian Girl Suits 75 to $2
Bronco Girl Suits for $2.00
In. Chief Suits 75 to S7.5Q
Cowboy S'ts S1.50 to $7.50
Cowboy Chaps, $2. $3 to $5
"S. & H." Green" Trading
Stamps given with purchases.
Ask for them.
Semi-Porcelain Dinner Set at Special Low Prices.
Pink decoration, with gold line.
$5.65 50-piece Sets at only $4.50
$7.55 60-piece Sets at only $6.00
$11.50 100-piece Sets, only $9.20
Very attractive Old English design.
$11.95 50-piece Sets now at $7.50
$15.25 60-piece Sets now $10.00
$24.40 100-piece Sets for 314.95
Garden Hose, Lawn Mowers, Garden Tools, etc., at special reduced prices Department on
Exclusive Portland agents for
'Automatic" Refrigerators. See them
Neat fancy shape in plain white.
42-piece Dinner Sets only S1.9S
50-piece Dinner Sets, only $2.99
60-piece Dinner Sets, only $3.99
our Third - Floor Department.
at tne registration bvoth.
oui r-acinc oast territory. He was a
-nat am I, Hennery?" and "Why,
civil war veteran.