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About Morning Oregonian. (Portland, Or.) 1861-1937 | View Entire Issue (May 17, 1906)
8 THE MORNING OBEGONIAN, THURSDAY. MAY 17, 1906. Entered at the Postoffice at Portland. Or., as Kecond-CUus Matter. -BCBBCRIPTION BATES. XT INVARIAP.I.T IN ADVANCE. M (By Mall or Express.) DAILY. SUNDAY INCLUDED. Tl month! ...$8.00 'x months ..........,........' - 4.-5 Three months S25 One month... a...... .73 retvred by carrier, par year......... XUvard by carrier, per month -75 Less time, per week -20 tundsy, one year 3-30 Weekly, one year (issued Thursday)... I SO Bundsv and Weeklv. one year 3 50 HOW TO lt&MIT Bend postoffice money rrder, express order or personal check on jrour local bank, stamps, coin or currency are at the senders risk. EASTERN BUSINESS OFFICE. The 8. C. Bkwltb Special Agrix-y New Tork. rooms 4S-SO. Tribune budding. Chl eago, rooms B10-5U Tribune building. KEPT ON BALE. Chiangs Auditorium Annex, Postoffice News. Co.. 178 Dearborn street. At. Paul, Minn. K. St. Maria, Commercial Station. IenTr Hamilton Kendrlck. 0o-lJ Seventeenth street; Pratt Book Store, 1214 fifteenth street; I. Weinstein. Ooldfleld. Ner. Frank Sandstrom. Kansas City, Ma. Rlckaecker Cigar Co., Ninth and Walnut. Minneapolis M. J. Xavanaugh, 30 South Third. - Cleveland. O. James Pushaw, SOT . Su perior street. New York City L. Jones at Co., Astor House. . Oakland, Cal. W. H. Johnston. ' Four teenth and Franklin atreeta; N. Wheatley. Ogden D. I.. Boyle. Omaha Barkalow Bros. 112 Farnam; Mageath Stationery Co., 1308 Farnami 240 fvouth Fourteenth. Sacramento. Cat. Sacramento News Co., 430 K street. Salt Lake Salt T.ake News Co.. 77 West Second street South; Miss L. Levin, 24 Church alreet. Los Angeles B. E. Amos, manager seven street wagons; Bar! News Co., VMVt South Broadway. aa Diego B. B. Amos. Pasadena, ( al. Berl News Co. Dan Kranclseo Foster A Orear, Ferry lewe Stand. Washington. r. C. Ebbltt House. Penn sylvania avenue. PORTLAND. THTRSDAY, MAT IT. !. A LETTER FROM MR. JONES. A letter by John Aubrey Jones, print ed today In another column, 1b one of those productions which exasperate the mind by their impudent violation of every principle of logic, fairness and truth. There are men with whom It Is Impossible to reason because they can not perceive the connection between premise and conclusion. From Interest, prejudice or conceit they first adopt some opinion, and thenceforward until the day of their death everything they learn or Imagine is tortured to confirm Jt. If a fact agrees with their. precon ceived notions, very well; if It does not agree, if It flatly contradicts, it Is all the same. A man like Mr. Jones is ca pable of twisting and contorting any fact you please until It seems to his own mind to prove any proposition whatever. If he should by some chance discover that water runs down bill, he would at once conclude from It that the moon is made of green cheese. Such men cannot tell the truth, because truthful ness Involves a certain Just apprecia tion nf human mnHvai nf ranaa and feet, of the relations among facts and things. They prevaricate, not from any particular love of falsehood, b.ut be cause they cannot discern the difference between fact and fiction. They are sometimes harshly, but correctly, de scribed as moral Idiots. One might as well expect a monkey to understand the binomial theorem as that such a man will be fair either to his neighbors or to characters in public life. He cannot be fair. His own mind being a chaotic Jumble of disconnected notions where truth and logic have no place or part, he inevitably Imagines , that all other minds are similar. It Is impossible for hLm to conceive of any man acting from reasoned principle, for he has no more Idea of principle than he has of the fourth dimension of space. His own sole motive for action being low and selfish cunning, he ascribes the same to all other men and can appre hend nothing different or higher. It Is only upon the supposition that Mr. Jones Is a person of this type that his extraordinary opinions of the President become Intelligible. That a sane, nor mally constituted) brain could cherish them is out .of the question. He asks The Oregonian to state spe cifically who the plutocratic enemies of the President are that have waged a campaign to discredit him. We do so, not' with any hope of enlightening Mr. Jones, but for the sake of other readers whom his delirious fancies might per rtaps bewilder. Recall the outcry raised by Tillman and others In the Senate over the Mrs. Morris episode at about the time when the Tate bill be came a live issue; the farcical "Inves tigation" by a Senate committee of the Panama Onnal and the scandalous re port of Poultney Bigelow, aimed direct ly at the President: the Insulting way In which the management of the rate bill was entrusted by the railroad ring to a notorious personal enemy of Mr. Roosevelt: the persistent assaults upon hi Integrity and Judgment by certain plutocratic Eastern newspapers: the outrageous attack which Standard Oil made upon him when Mr. Garfield's re cent report appeared; the Infamous ha rangue of Chancellor Day, of Syracuse University, who is known to be a ser vile puppet of the plutocratic "system." "We might recall other facts, but these are sufficient. The corporation mag nates and their organs and parasites have asserted with wearisome persist ency that tha country has lost confi dence in the President; that he is a man of -promise, but not of fulfillment; that he attempts but never executes; that he Is an Impulsive, headstrong, babbling Imbecile. If this !s not an at tempt to discredit 'Mr. Roosevelt, what Is it? We have not the least doubt that in Mr. Jones' case the campaign of slan der has been successful and that his misconceptions of Mr. Roosevelt are ex actly what the plutocrats have desired to implant In the mind of every cltlsen of the country. That they have failed in most instances only proves that the great majority of Americans are more Intelligent and falrmlnded than Mr. Jones. It.certainly does not prove that the attempt to mislead them has not been made. "Has not the President vehemently defended Aldrlch, Standard Oil. and so forth. In his muckrake speech?" Mr. Jones asks. No. he has not; and if our correspondent were a person of ordi nary fairness and" Intelligence he would not . ask such a question. In that speech Mr. Roosevelt pointed out the wrongfulness of slandering public men. He defended nobody from Just and truthful censhre. -Within a few days after the speech was made he transmit ted to the Senate Mr. Garfield's damn ing report upon the outrageous mis deed? of Standard Oil with caustic com ment, and the Department of Justice began action against the monopoly in the courts. Does this look like defense? Was it because the President had de fended Standard- Oil that Chancellor Day raved like a maniac against him and shrieked that he ought to be im peached? Is It the custom of Rockefel ler's monopoly to deride and revile its friends? Our correspondent thinks the Presi dent has capitulated to Aldrlch by- ac cepting the Allison amendment to the rate bill. In reply we need only say that the Allison amendment leaves the purport of the rate bill exactly as it was when it came from the House of Representatives. It makes no change whatever in the meaning and Intent of the bill, but simply puts Into plain lan guage what was before left to neces sary Implication. The purpose -of .the amendment is to remove doubt and avert controversy. It is in no -sense a capitulation. We confess that if we-believerd Mr. Jones to be morally responsible, the lat ter part of his letter-would astound us by its depravity. What must be the moral-state of a man who accounts for every action of, others upon the worst conceivable hypothesis? To him noth ing Is good, nothing is noble. He is like a swine nosing in fhe muck which de nies that there are stars in heaven. He first Imagines, absolutely without au thority, that Mr. Roosevelt desires a third term, and then interprets all that the President does In the black fog of that falsehood. Mr. Roosevelt has said in the most decided language that he does not desire and will not accept an other nomination for the Presidency. Who knows more about It, he himself or Mr. Jones? And yet, with no evi dence but his own disordered fancy, Mr. Jones rushes blithely forward and con victs the President of an infamous con spiracy against the people who love and trust him to obtain an honor which he has declared he would not accept. Would Mr. Roosevelt, unless he were -as insane as our correspondent, exchange the enduring love of the Nation and the prospect of a grea,t name in history for the transient and perfidious favor of a plutocratic .ring with the inevitable in famy which it would entail? We think not. Though. Mr. Jones may not believe it, there are such things as honor and decency in the world, and Mr. Roosevelt was not forgotten when the Almighty distributed those qualities among men. WHAT PORTLAND CAN DO. . For long time Portland was regarded everywhere as safe, solid, sane, stable and slow. Everybody said Portland was all right, for It had more money than It needed, more bus'.ness than it could well care for, and more mossbacks to the square foot than any other city on the Pacific Coast. Being rich, dignified, contented and a trifle exclusive, Port land was thought by many uninformed persons who had chanced to cat their lot with its somewhat envious neigh bors to be Indifferent to modern meth ods of promoting the common Interests of a community, and to be satisfied to plod along in an easy, untroubled and unprogresslve way. But It was all a mistake. Portland was always more enterprising and public-spirited than others thought it, and nearly as public spirited and enterprising as It thought itself. Within a very few years It has shown that no city in the West can do things In a large way more quickly, more intelligently or more generously than Portland. For example, Portland raised In a few days nearly $400,000 for the Lewis and Clark Exposition, and carried the great project to a proud and successful consummation. Portland has Just raised $250,000 more than any other Coast city for the suffering and desti tute of San Francisco; and there were no strings to this magnificent donation. And now the Commercial Club of Port land has Just raised $250,000 or raised it so nearly, as to insure the small bal ance for the erection of a -beautiful new club building. The Commercial Club recently suf fered the complete destruction of Its commodious quarters from fire. New quarters were Immediately found, and the members set about the task of car rying on the work of the organization with remarkable zeal and enthusiasm. The misfortune of loss of the old place was turned to splendid account In a plan for a building and site that should be entirely the club's own. After , the preliminaries were arranged and volun teer subscriptions had been made, com mittees were appointed and the active canvass began. This was only two days since. Last night It was announced that the $250,000 bonds had been sub scribed, nearly to the full amount. The small balance ie being reserved for club members who have not yet put down their names, to take In small amounts, so that the bonds may be held by everybody, large and small, who be longs to the Commercial Club. It is good work great work the kind of work that shows the world that we have a fine and active and progressive cttisenship that is now running things in Portland. APPLE TREE PLANTING. Missouri has the proud dtstinctkm-of having more apple trees than any other state In the Union. A rage, one might almost say, for planting apple trees took possession of the farmers of that state some years ago. Apple trees do not come into bearing as early in the Middle West as they do on the Pacific Coast, but the tree planters were not discouraged by the matter of a few years' waiting. They cultivated and pruned and sprayed, and as a result of their efforts the whole state, according, to the Kansas City Post, was one vast field of apple blossoms . on the first of May, presaging an apple crop the greatest ever known in any area of its size in the world. '- This is. of course, the estimate of a loyal Missburian. but It is big with the "promise of fulfillment. And It is as true in Missouri as elsewhere that It pays to raise apples, when intelligence combines with labor and climatic con ditions to produce , a crop. The or chardlsts of Hood ' River, of Rogue River Valley, and in many sections of the Willamette Valley, have demon strated this fact to their profit. Tet we have here now,( and have had for sev eral months, a market practically bare of apples. We cannot claim for Oregon, as the journal above quoted claims for Mis souri, that the apple will grow and thrive and yield a good crop on any soil and in any section of the state, but we do know that no crop will pay or has paid better in Oregon for the area engaged and th labor employed, than has the apple crop of w-hat is known as the commercial orchard I. e., the or chard -planted in a suitable location with the view to shipping the product by the carload. And it may be added that no other portion of the farm of eiual area contributes as much to the pleasure, nourishment and health of the farmer's family as does the apple or chard, the trees of which are selected so that there win be prime apples .for home consumption for at least nine months in the year. "What plant, we in the apple tree?" asked William Cullen Bryant in one of his beautiful nature poems. Answering in poetic strain, be said: Fruits that shall awell in sunny June And redden In the August noon. And drop when gentle airs come by. That fan the blue September akyr While children come, with criea of glee. And seek them when the fragrant grass Betrays their bed to those who paaa At the foot of the apple tree. This is the result of apple-tree plant ing which Imagination delights to paint and which reflects the pleasures of childhood upon after years. But the practical side of it is scarcely less at tractive though stated in prosaic words. In these farmers are urged to plant a few acres in well-selected apple-tree stock, take care of the trees at proper seasons, and in intelligent ways, and be assured of an investment that, like a mortgage, will grow while they sleep and in the end make for material pros perity. The one Is the poet's estimate on the investment comprehended . in apple-tree planting; the other is the es timate of the man who is looking, as is seemly, for material returns for his out lay in time, labor and care. ; And he who plants apple trees will find in the result of his work a realization of both the poet's dream and the practical man's bold assurance of profit on the Investment. TILLMAN AND THE DISPENSARY. Mr. Tillman's term in the United States Senate expires next March. He Is, of course, a candidate for re-election, and' his success depends somewhat, though' not entirely, upon the sentiment of the people of South Carolina toward the state dispensary system. This sys tem makes the state the sole dealer in Intoxicating drinks. It was adopted in South Carolina in Mr. Tillman's second term as Governor, some thirteen years ago, and has been a fruitful cause of controversy eyer since. He( has always been its stanch defender, and says he will make it the leading issue in his campaign for the Senatorship. The state liquor dispensary in South Carolina does a business of . three or four million dollars annually. It is con ducted through a central establishment at the capital and has saloons distrib uted throughout the state, with distil leries here and there as they seem to be needed. The employes "are necessarily numerous. It will therefore be easily understood that the dispensary is a powerful political factor in the state, perhaps more important than any other, and with a man of Mr. Tillman's abil ity and ardor to lead in its defense it Is not likely to be easily overthrown. Nevertheless the forces against it are not to be despised. It is attacked by the prohibitionists on moral grounds. Liquor selling in their eyes is quite as bad when the state carries it on as when it exists for individual profit. Other citizens agree with the prohibitionists in opposing the dispensary, though for different rea sons. The Charleston News and Cour ier declares that it is a shame to the state and that honesty, virtuous citi zenship and common decency are all ar rayed aga,inst It. A number of leading citizens have united In a call to organ ize the opposition to the dispensary, which they describe as "pernicious." It is a festering sore, they assert, and they believe that it will. remain a paramount issue in the politics of the state until it is finally abolished. From present appearances this will not happen immediately. With a strong political machine to fight its bat tles, and. Senator Tillman for a leader the dispensary will not die easily. The people of South Carolina, so far as can be discerned, are not particularly ex cited over the issue. Most of the county conventions have had nothing to say about it, but as a good many of them have adopted resolutions indorsing Mr. Tillman's course in the Senate, one may Infer a general friendliness to his poli cies in state affairs. Perhaps the farm ers and others of the ordinary sort do-j not care much where their liquor comes from, provided they "git it stiddy and stout." Since South Carolina will have a Democratic Senator in any case, and without reference to his views on the liquor business, one may wish Mr. Till man success. He is a lively and pictur esque figure whose absence would de cidedly diminish the gayety of the Na tion and poselbly impoverish the upper house as a source of edification. THE 8EA-LEVEL CANAL. The Senate committee having charge of Panama Canal legislation yesterday voted in Javor of constructing a sea level canal. As there was but one dis senting vote, and the failure to reach an earlier agreement has been a serious and expensive drawback to the work, it Is hardly probable that the friends of the lock system will make any serious interference with the sea-level plan. There has never been any question about the advantages of the sea-level canal after it was built, and' all the op position that has developed regarding it has been based on the greater length of time and increased cost necessary in construction. The' lock canal, where there is such a mighty traffic to be han dled as will flow through this gateway between the world's two greatest oceans, is in a degree not dissimilar to that railroad makeshift, the switchback over which trains are operated pending completion of a tunnel through the mountain. It would serve well its pur pose, but would never be regarded as permanent and complete. Estimates have varied regarding the difference in time and cost between the two types of canal, but five years is generally regard ed as the maximum additional length of time necessary to complete the type adopted, as compared with the time re quired for completing the lock type of canal. There has been considerable comment over the loss of prestige which the Pan ama route will suffer by reason of the early operation of the Tehuantepec route, but as this road will be open and doing business years before any type of canal will be in operation at Panama, the additional time necessary to complete the sea-level canal will have but little bearing on this feature of the-matter. The adoption of the sea level type will, however, demand that the Panama Railroad be operated to the highest degree of efficiency during the construction period. In order that as much traffic as possible can be retained by that route. It Is not alone necessary that the road be operated so that the Immense business attendant on the con struction of the canal can be handledi, but there should also be facilities and equipment for the rapid handling of all commercial business that is offering. The cost of either type of canal will be enormous-"so great, in fact, that It must be handed on to posterity for set tlement, and as posterity is to foot the bills, or at least a portion of them, it is perhaps best that we construct a canal that will last for all time, and will not require the expensive changes which would be necessary to transform a lock canal into one of the sea-level type. By reaching a definite decision as to the type of canal to be constructed, much of the uncertainty and delay which has hampered the work in the past will be brushed aside, and public interest, which has been permitted to lapse, will be restored. For many months the en tire canal problem has been in an ex ceedingly complex stage, but practically all of the various features of delay and uncertainty hinged on the one great question as to the type of canal to be constructed. The enemies of the canal were quite naturally willing to have the matter drift along in a befuddled state, as the indecision which has character ized previous Senatorial action, has been both expensive and demoralizing. The greatest question to be considered in connection with the canal having been settled, there should now be some speedy action on the. method of con struction. Nothing In the news reports that have come out of the canal zone warrants the belief that the best results are being secured by having the work done under the direct superintendence of the Government. Based on these reports.- as well as on the experience of the Government with the canal and locks at the Cascades of the Columbia, it seems certain that the work will be greatly facilitated and more economic ally handled by private contract. Hav ing disposed of the greatest question at issue in connection with the canal. Con gress can now take up the manner in -which the work is to be conducted and the mode of government to be adopted in the canal zone. The necessity for the canal is as great as it ever was, and the awakening of the Senate committee may also awaken that public sentiment which has been lying dormant, In keep ing with the inactivity at Washington. The Chicago wheat market took an other turn upward yesterday, but the strength on this side of the water finds no reflection in Europe. This is due to the plentiful supplies which Europe is receiving from Russia and the Argen tine, the former country being an espe cially dangerous factor against high prices. Russian exports have more than doubled la five years, and the crop continues to Increase at a rate that causes wonderment In the trade as to when the limit will be reached. The wheat harvest in Russia occurs at prac tically the same time of year as that of the United States, and now, at the tail end of the season, Russia is still ship ping about 3,000.000 bushels per week, which, with a like amount from, the Argentine, now nearlng the height of its shipping strength, goes a long ways toward meeting the immedi ate requirements of the European bread-eaters. If the Russian crop, which begins coming on the market within the next sixty days, maintains its present good condition, it will be a matter of indifference to the Europeans what prices may prevail In the United States. One George Seabury Is reported to have been "vigorously applauded" by the National Association of Manufac turers when he m9.de the assertion that, after a thorough study of the situation, he was satisfied that exports from the United States would be more than doubled when this country "has an ade quate merchant marine, like that of Great Britain and Germany." Ameri can exporters already enjoy the advan tage of cheap freights to all parts of the world, and to some ports notably South America we have lower rates than are granted British manufactur ers,, a condition which . has been the subject of more than one Parliamentary investigation and protest. Even admit ting that such was not the case, Mr. Seabury has not improved his argument for a subsidy bill, for Great Britain and Germany pay no subsidies to the vessels which carry their exports to the world's markets, and to be on even terms with these countries we must first be given permission to buy our ships as cheaply as our competitors secure them. The Washington Railroad Commis sion has Just returned from a junket to Cuba. Railroad Commissioners from thirty-three states met in Washington, D. C, in April, and after a four days' session made a trip to the Florida sea side resorts and to Havana. The sec retary, of the commission has written a very Interesting account of the trip, in which he tells of visiting the spot where Columbus said mass, where De Soto's wife awaitect the return of her hus band, and where Lopez and other patrir ots were shot. If any of the horny- handed sons of toil who foisted the Railroad Commission on the State of Washington has ever entertained any doubt as to getting the worth of his money out of that $75,000 appropriation for the commission, it will surely be dissipated on reading the report, of the secretary on the first grand, junket of the commission. If the secretary's story gets into general circulation in Oregon, there will be renewed pressure for a Railroad Commission in this state. Manager Will J. Davis, of the ill fated Iroquois Theater, Chicago, was indicted for manslaughter last Tues day, and Mrs. Cordelia Botkin. of San Francisco, who poisoned Mrs. Dunning with candy about eight years ago, be gan to serve a life sentence at San Quentin. What the bard said about the law's delays applies "as well to the twentieth century as to the sixteenth. Studying Vesuvius with a view ulti mately of being able to forecast earth quakes is an interesting phase of scien tific inquiry. Fifty years ago the civil ized world would have said such inves tigation was the pursuit of an irides cent dream, but today we await results without scoffing. In undertaking to build and operate a $1,500,000 tourist hotel at Tokio, Japan, is one step in advance of its sister na tions. Whether the enterprise will suc ceed is doubtful; a good soldier does not necessarily make a good landlord. The inkeeper is born, not made. If the Panama Canal Commission shall succeed in establishing the tenta tive policy of buying stuff in the cheap est markets, perhaps a precedent will be established for National reform in the sacred tariff. Portland seems to have rescued the Pacific Coast League from disintegra tion. Let the Beavers play the game from this time on, and no fear need1 be felt of lack of public support. The church authorities beg to assure Dr. Crapsey that it will be all right if he will recant and teach that the spir itual world is flat. The Spring rise in our mountain streams, though rapid as usual, scarce ly keeps pace with the price of logs which they float. Sugar has declined three-quarters of a cent. Good. That leaves so much more to spend for strawberries. A MOUSE HIS ONLY GAME. Burroughs Denies Frealaeat Shot Mama 1st Yellowstone. New York Sun. For three years John Burroughs has postponed the performance of a- duty he owed to history the chronicling of his excursion into the Yellowstone Park with President Roosevelt in the Spring of 1903. In the Atlantic Monthly for May Mr. Bur roughs now tells the story of his camp life with Mr. Roosevelt. It is worth reading. We note, in the first place, with consid erable satisfaction, that Mr. Roosevelt was scrupulous in his observance of the law against the destruction of bird and animal life in the Yellowstone Park. Whatever werer his impulses and tempta tions in the presence of big game, he obeyed the law of the land as faithfully as If he had not been protected from de tection in wrong-doing by the exclusion of the reporters, the surveillance of none but a few carefully selected companions, including Mr. Burroughs, and miles of re moteness and hundreds of pickets cover ing every possible route of approach. Mr. Burroughs' testimony concerning this is positive: As we were riding along In our big sleigh toward the Fountain Hotel, the President suddenly Jumped out and. with his soft hat as a shield to his hand, captured a mouse that was running along over the ground near us. He wanted It for Dr. Merrlam. on the chance that It might be a new apecies. While we all went flehing In the afternoon, the President skinned his mouse and prepared the pelt to be sent to Washington. It was done as neatly aa a profeased taxidermist would have done it. This was the only game the President killed In the Park. Not a single mountain lion; only one Inconsiderable mouse, and that for strict ly scientific purposes! While it is possible that a great constitutional lawyer like Mr. Tillman, of South Carolina, might persuade himself that this mouse came constructively under the prohibition of section 4 of the act of 1894, Inasmuch as Mr. Roosevelt could not have supposed that it was a dangerous animal, about to destroy human life, or to inflict physical injury on any of the party, we do not imagine that the President is in jeopardy of impeachment for the killing and skin ning of the Government's protected little beast. Much more interesting than this story of the mouse is the North River natural ist's record of his observations of the President's demeanor when emancipated from the restraint of conventional life. The train would start and the President would espy a little brown schoolhouse near the track, with the schoolma'am and her flock drawn up i-j line: ' We were at luncheon, but the President caught a glimpse ahead through the window and took in the situation. With napkin in hand, be rushed out on the platform and waved to them. "Those children," he said, as he came back, "wanted to see the Presi dent of the United States, and I could not disappoint them. They may never have an other chance." Next, he would be entertaining his old cowboy friends, "as'happy with them as a schoolboy ever was In meeting old chums." He "beamed with delight all over," all along the line. He "bubbled with laughter continually." In the park ha gleefully chased little birds as they flew from tree to tree. When he an. Mr. Buroughs ran down a band of elk, near Power Falls, "the President laughed like a boy." One day he was shaving, when a band of mountain sheep was re ported in front of the camp: One side of his face was half shaved and the other lathered. Hofer and I started for a point on the brink of the canon, where we could have a better view. "By Jove!" aaid the President, "I must see that. The shaving can wait, and the sheep won't." ... So on he came, accoutred as he was coat less, hatlesa, but not latherleas nor towel leas. . . . .He laughed with delight of it and quite forgot his need of a hat ,and coat till I ent for them. ' Mr. Burroughs' veracious pen is the first to record, we believe, from the President's own lips, the story of his encounter years ago with a "bad man" in the barroom of a little frontier hotel. As he entered the room he saw that every man there had been terrorized by a half-drunken ruffian, who stood in the middle of the floor, re volver in hand, compelling all comers to treat: "I went and sat down behind the stove." said the President, "as far from him as I could get, and hoped to escape hie notice. The fact that I wore glasses, together with my evident desire to avoid a fight, appar ently gave him the Impression that I could be imposed upon with impunity. He very soon approached me, flourishing his two guns, and ordered me to treat. I made no .reply for gome moments, when the fellow became so threatening that I saw something had to be done. The crowd, mostly sheep herders and small grangers, sat or stood back against the wall, afraid to move. I was nnarmed, and thought rapidly, saying: Well, if I must. I must.' I got up as If to walk around him to the bar; then, as I got opposite him I wheeled and fetched him as heavy a blow on the chin point as I could strike. He went down like a steer before the axe, firing both guns Into the ceiling as he went. I Jumped on him, and, with my knees on his chest, disarmed him in a hurry. The crowd was then ready enough to help me. and we hog-tied him and put him in an outhouse." The President alludes to this Incident in his "Ranch Life," but does not give the details. It brings out his met tle very distinctly. Mr. Roosevelt once told Mr. Burroughs that "all he cared about being President was Just 'the big work.' " He raced Bur roughs on skis over the deep snow banks: As we were going swiftly down the side of one of the hills. I saw out of the corner of my eye the President taking a header into the snow. The snow had given aw.ay be neath him. and nothing could save him from taking the plunge. I don't know whether I called out. or only thought, something about the downfall of the administration. At any rate, the administration was down and pretty well burled, but It was quickly on Its feet again, shaking off the snow with a boy's laughter. I kept straight on. and very soon the laugh was on me. for the treacherous snow sank beneath me. and I took a header, too. "Who is laughing now, Oom John?" called out the President. The spirit of the boy was In the air that day about the canyon of the Yellowstone, and the biggest boy of us all was President Roosevelt. Wheat Mother Strike. Chicago Tribune. All is In a flutter: Parlor isn't swept: Live on bread and butter How the house is kept: Breakfast: One stale waffle That no one can like This is simply awful; Motbera on a strike! Baby's In the cradle Yelling like a fiend: ' Pot and pan and ladle All wait to be cleaned; Milk la in the bottle Waiting till it sours Mother's quit the throttle. Struck for shorter hours. Everything is dusty: All the fires are out; Knives and forks are rusty Trash Is all about: Children all need dressing Where's the brush and comb? Isn't this distressing? Xo one runs the home. Father's argumentative; Mother won't reply Says there's no incentive; Bha won't sweep and frv; Wash and drees and hustle This was her remark Cacriftcing muscle From the dawn till dark. Frowns on arbitration; What are we to eat? See our consternation! Mother's smile is sweet: She is bland and pleasant ; She Is full of pluck. Home is fierce at present ilother's gone aad struck! YOUNGEST MAN AT CAPITAL vlncle Joe" ran May the Gam toe Some Time to Come. New York Evening Sun. Speak to "Joe" Cannon about Cannon for President in 1908 and he pooh-poohs the notion: talks about his antiquity, and modestly avers that, whatever else he may be, he is no fool. Or words to that effect. Such a Methuselah as he think of having a boom? Preposterous, my boy. preposterous. Meanwhile the inward eye of this Danville younker must wink rap Idly and happily. The exuberant and almost excessive vi tality of "Uncle Joe" is clear to every body. He has no more nerves than a Chinaman. The banging of the gavel is low music to him. and a "field day" and half riot in the House are as gentle mas sage. There is no heartier eater, laugher and story-teller In the world: and as -he showed at his birthday party, he is a competent handshaker. In view of this notorious juvenility and all-around soundness. Uncle Joe's inclina tion to dwell upon his age is only more evidence of his serpentlike wisdom. - A candidate mustn't be too forward, and above all mustn't be premature. "Uncle Joe" marks himself hors de concours. out of the running. If the delegates to the next Republican National convention are divided among a number of favorite sons, what Is more natural than that they should unite upon a general favorite ex cept, perhaps, in New Mexico, Arisona. Oklahoma and Indian Territory and lo! "Joe" Cannon's name leads all the rest? The congratulatory dispatch of the Hon. Clark E. Carr, an Illinoisan who will come to 70 years on May 20. is notice to "Uncle Joe" that he is subject to the right of eminent domain: that he Is not beyond the age of conscription: 'No patriotic American can become so old or so exalted as to disregard the man date of the people when they call us." "Uncle Joe" must be frightened by some of the precedents. Thiers was elected President of the French Republic at 74. Bismarck's resignation at 75 was not for old age. Grevy was re-elected President of the French Republic at 78. Gladstone was Premier for the third time at 77. "Uncle Joe" is but a child as yet. With the Ram In and Wit Oat. Philadelphia Press. Secretary Shaw tells this one: "Dur ing the last National campaign an elo quent orator was urging the people in one of the Southern cities to support the Democratic ticket. -Harry' Gass away Davis, who was over 80 years old, was considered a poor candidate, and many of the spellbinders believe! that the presence of Davis, who, although an octogenarian, was still a man of ability and would live out his term with good Iuck, would have a salutary influ ence on the voters. One of the auditors, who had drunk more than his allow ance of red eVe. almost broke up the meeting by exclaiming: T am a pretty good Democrat, but I can t vote for an octogenarian, as no member of my fam ily has yet voted for a man with negro blood In his veins, and I'm not going to do it now. Wives Who Make Americana Great. Philadelphia Dispatch. Mary Mortimer Maxwell, the English authoress, has just completed a clever se ries of stories entitled "An Englishwoman in New York." A recent number was de voted to the comparison between the American man of business and the Eng llsh man of business. Miss Maxwell's conclusion was: In England it is the man who keeps abreast of the times and "who does things that are really worth while," but in America the average man leaves the things which are outside of his bus! ness to his wife. "If he has a wife or a fiancee he expects her to do the reading for him. Tqe other day I asked a man if lie had read any history of the world. - ' " 'No,' he answered, .'but my wife Is reading it.' " I.ove Files Where Gold la Not. Cincinnati Inquirer. Because his "mansion," as described in a matrimonial paper, turned out to be a cabin. Miss McElheney, aged 18, of Bry ant. Ind., Is said to have deserted Corbley lams, a 60-year-old bachelor of Bluings, Mont., within 30 hours after their mar riage. The courtship preceding had been conducted through a matrimonial ex change. The young woman is said to have returned to Indiana. lams Is very Indignant. He says he sent the young woman money with which to come to Montana. Miss McElheney declared be- gore leaving that she had been deceived as to lams' worldly prospects. Relic of the Aristocratic Paat. Baltimore News. The original commission- of Thomas Lord Fairfax. Baron of Cameron, who owned Greenway Court, in Clarke County, and all the Northern Neck 'of Virginia many years ago. has been found among some relics and old documents bought by Dr. Charles von Witt, a Winchester, Va., optician. It is elaborately engraved on parchment, dated in England, April, 1738, and is in a fair state of preservation. Lord Fairfax's body lies under the altar In "Christ Protestant Episcopal Church In Winchester. , state of Ohio Owns a Dog;. Exchange. The State of Ohio is the owner of a dog In New Bremen. Angjalze County. The dog's name is Ourly, and is supposed to be the property of Jim Doyle, whose place of abode is on a canal boat. The Asses sors were Instructed by the County Audi tor to charge all canines to the property in which they are found- Since the Doyle homestead is on state property, the local Assessor saw no other way out and listed the dog as" the property of the Buckeye State. ON THE ANXIOUS BENCH w l - lip .v3& LIFE IN THE OREGON COUNTRY. W114 Pigeons in Llasu Brownsville Times. A good many wild ptgoons are being killed In the wheat fields around town. They are more plentiful than for a number of years. Happy In Its Payroll. The bustling town of Ontario, on the far side of the state, is rejoicing over a brick factory that will add $700 a month to the payroll. It is the pay rolls that count. Alaa, Poor Maggie Joseph Herald. Maud Dale, while on her way to Chlco Friday, had the misfortune to be thrown from her horse. She broke seven bones and half killed Maggie Jones in tne shade of the stately pine tree. Oregoa Country Kewsanperw. C. D. Ball has suspended the Mount Tacoma Pennant and established the South Tacoma Press. Starvation is no longer staring ye editor in the face we have fresh veg etables and weeds in our own garden. Kelso Journal. Jackson County has a new paper the Central Point Herald, by Lancaster & Tattison. Mr. Pattison being editor. It looks good and sounds good. "Drammer In Jackson County. Medford Tribune. Beeson's "Uncle Tom's Cabin" Troupe appeared before a small audience nt Davis' Opcra-House Saturday night, and if toe people had known what was in store for them the number would have been less. It certainly was fierce, and the only ones that got any enjoyment out of It were some girls In the gallery who cried when Little Eva went to heaven. The scenic represen tation of the celestial regions, with the red fire effects, looked more like hell than heaven. Not I he Horse for Him. Astoria Herald. Hans came In from his ranch two miles this side of Olney this week to buy a horse. "I've got the very thing you want," said Ike Bergman, "it's a fine road horse. Five years old, sound as a quail, $175 cash down, and he goes ten miles without stopping." Hans threw his hands skyward. "Not for me." he said, "not for me. I wouldn't gif you 5 cents fc- him. I live e,ight miles from Astoria und I'd haf to walk back two miles." Equine Longevity. Dr. Young In Salem Statesman. There Is a mare at Perrydale that was 31 last Spring. Mr. Falkner, of Sheridan, had her in his livery stable for a number of years, afterward traded lo a blacksmith at Perrydale who bred her to a thoroughbred and she now has a fine filly at her side. - One mare I know of in The Dalles is 37. She is owned by French & Co bankers, and last March when I saw her she made Mr. French a good driv ing horse, and was without a blemish. I dressed her mouth and found as good a pair of molars as I ever saw ini mare 8 years old. Lane Coonty Wolf Story. Cottage Grove, Western Oregon. The Doak boys, T. M. and J. W., found a wolf den at Stony Point on the Dave Coleman place, three miles north of Lorane postoffice on Siuslaw. The young men needed help for the capture and got Scott Jackson. The hunters opened the entrance to the cave with a blast of powder suffi ciently large to allow the entrance of a man. Scott crawled into the cave and soon saw two shining eyes. He called for his gun and fired. The wolf ,n'a wounded but not so badly but that she made a rush for Jackson. He beat her off and got another shot. That laid her low with the two whelps that had been killed by the first shot. He captured the remaining whelps, three In num ber. These are snapping tilings and wsill probably have to die before they get large enough to eat poultry and mutton. Know Belter Neat Time. Baker Democrat. Yesterday afternoon George W. Ash by secured a license at the Courthouse to wed Mrs. Ida Reed. A little later they appeared before Judge Currey and the legal knot was tied. The bridegroom was about the limit as to bashfulness and was taking his de parture without having so much as said "Thank you," to the Judge. His Honor went down into his stomach for a remark to the effect that some thing had been forgotten. The groom looked up, stuttered a few words and then remarked: "Oh, yes, the treats!" And then he reached in his pocket for a lone cigar which finds favor out in Pine Valley. Tom Gorman, who offi ciated as best man, smiled, used a few adjectives and told the groom to pay the man. Quickly was Mr. Ashby's purse out and as he fumbled with its contents, took the pains to remark be was rot nervous. He proved to be quite the contrary, however, as in ex tracting a $5 bill he tore it completely in ywo. Who Wants to Be a Klngf Springfield (Mass.) Republican. A millionaire who has an ambition to be a monarch would do well to hid in Lundy Island, at the entrance of Bristol Channel, which is to be sold toward ths' end of the year. It is three miles long and one mile wide, and has been over looked by the insatiable British empire. It is no county, it pays no taxes, its own er is a monarch In his little realm. And all this splendid isolation within sight of the shores of England! Prom the PhUadelphia Record.