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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (April 5, 2019)
C3 THE DAILY ASTORIAN • FRIDAY, ApRIL 5, 2019 Hostage to constant talkers Dear Annie: How do you Dear Tired Ears: Any rela- politely handle “the talkers”? tionship or encounter we have There seem to be a lot of them out with people should be a two- there — you know, friends, peo- way street. If you leave feeling ple you meet at gatherings, etc., drained after having talked with who talk nonstop and a friend, then perhaps it’s DEAR hardly allow you the time time to find a new friend ANNIE to say anything. Conver- — especially if you have sation should be a two- been upfront with your way street, not a mono- friend and your com- logue, but they don’t ments have landed on seem to get it. deaf ears. For example, some- Also, be aware of one will talk on and on whether you are listen- about a trip he took or ANNIE LANE ing to the talkers’ stories. Creators Much of the time, we will take, and yes, that Syndicate Inc. don’t listen to the other is interesting to me, but person because we are I’d like to mention my trip, too, and he never comes up waiting to speak ourselves — the for air. Whatever I might have to very thing you are addressing in say is of no interest to these talk- your letter. ers. When they pause, I am able With a stranger or someone to actually get a sentence in, but you don’t know, you can always after they hear it, they just con- politely interrupt him or her and tinue on with their monologue exit the situation. without commenting. Unfortunately, there could be All this listening on my part a medical reason for why your is exhausting. I feel like a cap- chatterbox friend can’t stop. tive audience. So now I just don’t Compulsive talking could be a socialize as much. I have told a sign of attention deficit hyperac- friend she talks too much, but she tivity disorder or anxiety. With just laughed, as if it were cute or that in mind, if the person is a something. But with a stranger or really good friend, perhaps she someone I don’t know well, what is having a tough time and needs your friendship, but be firm in should I say? — Tired Ears insisting that for your friendship to continue, your conversations must include both of you. Dear Annie: Your reply to “Hurt, Frustrated and Appalled in Florida,” the woman whose hus- band agreed to host his daugh- ter’s wedding at their house, did address the lack of communica- tion and issues with his children. However, reading between the lines, I think this woman is afraid of having all those strangers in her home. A few suggestions might ease her mind. Remove items that might easily get bro- ken or are valuables to an off-lim- its bedroom. Remove all medica- tion and personal items from the bathrooms. She should remember that this is a small wedding, with 65 guests. Probably only close fam- ily and friends will be invited. A generous spirit in this wedding process will go a long way toward improving the family relation- ships. — Tennessee Reader Dear Tennessee Reader: Thank you for sharing your help- ful hints. You are correct that a generous spirit will go a long way, not only during this wed- ding process but during her entire lifetime. TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Balanced is not the same thing as equal. Strange things can balance out and often do. You can’t argue with what works, nor is there any point in arguing with what doesn’t. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You’re always making efforts to accommodate. Usually, life is better if you can swing it. But right now, it’s just easier when everyone eats the same food and likes the same kind of entertainment. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You realize what’s at stake for you, but in order to reach an agreement, you also have to know what’s at stake for the other person. You’ll reach agreement in at least three instances before the day is done. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Because you take business personally and treat people so well, you’ll reap the benefits of a fulfilling atmosphere where you spend a good deal of your time. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). It’s fun to think about the future so long as you can avoid getting so caught up in planning and dreaming that you miss what’s happening right now. What you have is extremely precious! VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). There’s comfort in knowing what you can expect. When you tell people what they are about to experience and then deliver on that, the reaction will be extremely favorable. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Take the high road. You don’t have to take it out of benevolence. You can take it out of utility, just because it’s the way most likely to solve the problem, and take the benevolence points as a bonus. FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). The time to set a goal for a conversation is before you have it. It may help to write down your goals and questions because it’s a lot harder to recall this reasonable part of the brain when face to face. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). There are so many wonderful things about your current position, most of them so common to you that you can’t really see them. It’s why the perspective of strangers is so valuable to you now. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). You’ll be evan- gelizing for a cause that will make the world better. Ignore the nonbelievers. You’ll gain real numbers and momentum with those who are on the fence, just waiting to be convinced. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). All the kin- dergarten rules apply, and those much older will avoid all sorts of mayhem from applying the basics like “eyes on your own page” and “hands to yourself.” PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Remember when you made that commitment when you really don’t know much about it? Now you know. Future commitments are harder to make from this wizened position. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (April 6). The cele- bration of your birth won’t be just a day. It will be ongoing, sporadic and surprising, the way the cosmic forces seem to gift you through this solar return. One of the gifts comes in the form of people who really get you and get behind what you do. Another is the environ- ment that better supports you. Aquarius and Gemini adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 8, 30, 1, 19 and 10.
